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About The Columbus journal. (Columbus, Neb.) 1874-1911 | View Entire Issue (July 14, 1886)
Fh r.. - 1 M I i"lui a. ; k I r ; TS A HOT PLACE. ejearalag at Hawaii, a Comspoadeafe Ia terrlewa a Volcano ia FaU Blast. H. S. Jordan writes to the Chicago Intcr-Occan from Kohala, Hawaii: The proper name of this rrcat crater is Kileauaand it is situated on the south ern slope of the Mauna Loa Mountain, some several thousand feet below the apex. -The crater proper is nine miles in circumference and about sjx hundred feet deep. The'floor of" this crater is covered with black lava, and every few weeks or months it receives a new coat-' ing. This floor is as uneven as the waves of the restless ocean. The de scent into the crater is made by a path cut down and alongside of this great Pali. On leaving the house the excur sionist is provided with stout staff and a, lantern. The guide precedes the com pany with staff, lantern, and a large canteen of water. The volcano proper lies two and one-half miles from the outer rim of the crater. The trip across the lava can be made with reasonable safety during the daytime, but woe to the traveler who will not havo the guide even in daylight That lava is fearfully treacherous, and what seems safe one moment may next prove a great hole or fissure. The trusty Hawaiian who has traveled that crater for years knows the result of each flow. The approach to -the volcano was made from the safest side on account of the treacherous wind, which is apt to veer and Miiothcr you with sulphurous smoke. If at any time you are overtaken the guide drops upon his knees, opens, that canteen, calls for your handker chief, and thoroughly wetting, puts it cross your mouth, exclaiming, "aole pilikia no danger. There are three orifices out of which at times pour red Lot lava. "Lua Hou," The New Lake: "Halemauniau." the house of everlast TbeT ing fire, and Peles Throat, alias Little Beggar, so named because it draws its supply from the New Lake. Halemauinau is the oldest lake and has a circumference of about a mile. IT HAS FOR UNKNOWN TEARS been at work, and upon two sides has great walls, scores of feet high, leaving one opening and a second in case of great eruptions. The new lake lies to the east about half a mile, and Is nearly round and has a diameter of not less than eighty rods. This lake has thrown an embankment all around itself probably fifteen feet high, and teighteniug it by lava this lake becomes active lava over this wall with is constantly flows. When it throws red a recklessness jthat is truly reprehensible. The Little Beggar is situated quite a distance from the new lake; it looks like a lighthouse built out of the remains of the great Chicago lire. It has an opening on the side, near the apex, aud out of this con stantly dart the fiery tongues of this subterranean hell. During the eruption the molten lava belches out of this opening at an incredi ble rate. Pole was the ancient god of the Hawaiians, and because this was throat shaped it was called the throat of a god. Strange to say many of the na tives still cling to their old .superstitions anent the volcano. This race is peculiar ly superstitious. All that religion,cduca tion, and science have done has not thoroughly eliminated it The Rev. Mr. Oleson, of the Hilo Boys' Boarding School, records with great gusto that he and thirty boys slept in the crater, and the boys evinced not a particle of super stition. The Hawaiiaus used to offer sacrifices to this great god, and some of them still observe that custom despite the ridicule heaped ujion the heads of the devotees. Not long ago a native woman, widely known in the island, a member of the" church and having royal blood in her veins, came to oiler sacri fice. She brought a pig, two roosters, some taro-poi, and various other articles. The lake at this time was encrusted, the fire having temporarily subsided. The pig was tietl and heaved over into the black lava. IT WAS A HOT PLACE. The protest of the pig was grateful to the god and appeasing to tiu woman's conscience. The roosters did not take --so.pnilosophical and religious a view of the matter. Evidentlythev had some where sot a tasto of the "XewTheW ology, and flopped about until they broke their fastenings and then flew away. The natives were frightened out of their wits, believing that some awful catastrophe was at hand; but that god must be appeased and they gave stern chase to those plucky unbelievers, caught aud fastened them securely, and as the lake again broke up they were cast into the Tier- depths and swallowed up by that burning that never ceases. If this woman had been an ignorant re ligieuse we might charitably have said that she mixed her theology very badly, but the fact is she was well educated in English and an intelligent woman. It is not to be wondered at that the ignorant natives regarded this house of everlast ing fire as a god. No intelligent man can approach this great wonder of na ture without more fully believing in Genesis i., 1. The reverent student of nature and science looks upon this mighty volcano and exclaims in the words'of the book of books, "In wisdom Thou hast made them all." The volcano is not always active. Sometimes it quite dies down. A few years ago Halcmaumau sank down and it was impossible with the naked eye to sec the bottom. Ordinarily this is not true. The fire falls away several feet from the top of the lake and at that point the lava cools sufliciently to allow the formation of a crust of lava. It looks like dirty snow, save here and there red-hot lines four or five inches wide extending across the crater. This usually lasts about one hour and a halt Then this black crust begins to rise like a large leviathan out of the sea. It is fair ly frightful to look upon. THEN THE FIRE BURSTS OUT in great columns and jets, throwing great sheets of molten lava into the air. The sound is similar to the swish and swash of the waves of the ocean. When the volcano is thus active the whol heavens seem to be on fire, and the lurid; w glare lights the country for miles and miles around. Angrier and angrier grow the flames, until they leap oat, sending out long lines of red hot lava, and there they lie like billows of fire, exhausted yet terrible to behold. This work goes on unceasingly. What is to be the future of this apparently gather ing force no human can tell. The fires are being pent up; they are exhibiting an awful restlessness that will not al ways submit to restraint They un doubtedly will gather force until at last the top of Mauna Loa will be blown heavenward and the dwellers of this fair isle will be as hopelessly buried be neath ashes and stone, as was Pompeii in the days when the anger of Vesuvius was satisfied only by the death of every living thing within its grasp. Near by this great volcano are vast craters that indicate the dying down of eruptive fires and the gathering of their forces at this given central point Into one of these craters about 2,000 feet deep, the writer and our Union soldier descended, and so far as is now known the first white men that ever trod the floor of that extinct crater, Kilcau Ski or Jtilean dead. Then a fearful and dan gerous climb out, a little further on a. ' view of the ill fated. Captain Cook's monument and the journey is com plete. Since the above was written tele- aphtc advices from the Sandwich rods state tuat volcanic phenomena which were accompanied by a large number of shocks of earthquake, result ed in tke total disappearance of New "Lake and Halemaumau, two pits in the crater of the volcano Kilauea, and the extinction of the fire in them. These ars believed to be the pre- fature, cither In Kilauea or Mauna Loa. Some, basing their views on the, obser vations of Prof.' Agassiz, believe the dis appearance of ihc'fire is a prelude to the extinction of Kilauea. Rnm and Oil. "Let me have a little butter, please," said a stout clderlv gentleman, who stood in front of the "Morton houso bai the other evening, with a ghiss of steam inghot rum before him. The whitc-aproncd bartender bent down, and from a shelf underneath the polished mahogany brought up a dish of buttor in which was stuck a silver knife. With this the man took off a lump of butter and dropped it into his glass and stirred it about until it was melted. Then he drank the concoction slowly, with an oily smile overspread ing his features. "Yes, it is rather a curious drink," said the bartender to the reporter stand ing by, "bat it is a very pleasant one, and a E1' favorite with some gentle men. Those who don't know of its ef fects, however, had better lot it alone, for the effects are apt to be queer. The man who. drinks a number of these hot rums would be quite sober when he went home, but in tiie morning when he woke up he would be as drunk as a lord. That's odd, isn't it? But it is easy enough to explain. It is because there is so much oil in the butter. "Let me explain, and you can try it yourself. Take a bottle of sweet-oil with you when you go out with the boys the next time. Order any kind of liquor you like, though I wouldn't bother much with beer if I were you. Pour in to the glass a few drops of sweet-oil every time you take a drink. No mat ter how much you drink you will keep sober, while your friends, if they have kept up with you, will be in a very how-nmf.vnii-i' I'nndition. You po home &D(1 S to bed feeling all right and in the morning when you wake up you will be dead dmuk. "The reason is sim ple. Oil, as you must know, rises to the surface. "Consequently, when you drink these oil-covered concoctions the oil will re main on the surface in your stomach, keeping the fumes of the liquor down. That prevents you from getting drunk. When you have stopped drinking and gone to sleep, thus giving your interior arrangements a chauce to go about their ordinary duties, the oil will grad ually evaporate itself through the sys tem, allowing the funics of the liquor to rise to your head. The consequence is that you awake iu the morning 'full.' It's the funniest tiling in the world when a man has this experience for the first time. He can't understand it at all, neither can his wife, who has seen him go to bed sober the night before, ami can't be persuaded that he has not got up during the earl' hours to take on tiie load he apparently has with him. But ter has the same effect us sweet-oil, be cause it contains a large percentage of that fluid in its coinjxjsition, so l'u ad vise vou to leave hot rum and butter se verely alone if you're a married man. But if your'e going on a trip, anil want to take along a load that won't operate until the next dav, you can try what oil will do for you." X. Y. Star. A Manager's Lucky Number. Col. John McCaull, of the Broad Street Opera House, is in no way an old man, except that he is a disbeliever in many popular theories of modern times, one of which is the fatalism of the num ber IS. He declares the dogma of one plus a dozen being a combination of misfortunes is heresy. To the energetic manager of "The Mikado" and "Black Hussar" the number is full of charm and luck. This was the conclusion that the Times gatherer came to, after a short talk with the Colonel. The con versation was brought about bv the hap py manner in which the colonel had written an acceptance to a dinner to be f" iven by the famous "13" Club of New brk. "Colonel, do you have no feeling of fear to sit down with a company of thir teen?" was the query. This made the managerial Napoleon smile, and he remarked: "Ishould certainly feci uncomfortable wftlrany'other-niBlnber arouud the fes tal board. Some people lose their ap petites when there are. thirteen at the least and sit a whole year expecting trouble. At two of the most enjoyable feasts I ever sat down to there were just thirteen in the company. They were given when we opened "'The Mikado' season here. "At the supper given the night before our opening with the D'Oyley Carte Company there were just thirteen gen tlemen from Japan and maids from school, including the daughter-in-law-elect On the night of our opening we entertained Sir Arthur Sullivan at dinner and we had thirteen at the table, and the great composer thought it so unique that he wrote home about it "This was certainly a 'pretty how d'ye do' for nervous folks, and a kettle of lish for people who are superstitious. We did not have such bad luck, after all. We opened with a $1,300 house and played a successful season of thir teen weeks. "I never understood why thirteen was my magical number until I recalled the fact that I was born on the 13th of the month. I was the thirteenth John in the family, went to school until X ? was 13, and married thirteen years after that time. ' ;i' "In looking over the register of the boxes I find that we opened with a box party of thirteen, and out of 110 we had during the season there were eighteen that were composed of 13 people. I be lieve in 13. It knocks out the biblical 40 and 7, and to say nothing of the mokes' sugge3tiyei4-ll-44. I take good care that my shoemaker puts 13 buttons on my shoes and always wear my scarf 13 inches long. I am an original 13 man. Here is mv coupe. I'm off for tiie Broad Street "Statiou." ,Qn the lamp of the hack was the mys- UppaJ number 13. Philadelphia Times. The Hotel Hygela, Fortress Monroe. The Hotel Hygeia has this advant age, which is appreciated at least by the young ladies. The United States fort is close at hand, with its quota of young officers, who have the leisure in times of peace to prepare for war, domestic or foreign; and there is a naval station across the bay, with vessels that need fashionable inspection. Considering the acknowledged scarcity of young men at watering-places, it is the duty of a paternal government to place its niili tarv And naval stations elose to thn fashionable resorts, so that the young I aJfca A lm i Sa SVatt j lajar 4 S J iniHtn wk I and other branches of the life of tiie period can have agreeable assistants. It is the charm of fortress Monroe that its heroes arc kept from ennui by the company assembled there, and that they can be of service to society. Charles Dudley Warner, in Harper Magazine for ApriL i s The famous diamond, the Kohinoor, which Queen Victoria wears on great occasions, belonged to an Indian prince, but .was appropriated by the English during the 'Indian mutiny of 1857. Dhuleep Singh, whose property the Kohinoor was before the English seized it, now demands its restoration. He wrote to Lord Salisbury on the matter shortly before the latter's resignation from offioe, and received in reply a note in which Salisbury "refused to discuss such chimerical nonsense.' i The millennium is due, according to Prince Krapotkine, in fourteen years. "Before 1900 we shall be delivered from the fleecing capitalists and monopolists, team. State despotism and fopkistiy," Prnninjc. Vs One of our chief aims' is Jto form an evenly '-balanced,- -open, --symmetrical head, and this can often be accom plished better by a little watchfulness during the season of growth than at any other time. If for instance, two branches start so closely together that one or "the other must be removed in the spring pruning, why let the sujH;rfluous one grow at all? It is just so much wasted effort By rubbing off the pushing bud or tender shoot the" strength of the tree is thrown into the branches that we wisji to remain. Thus the eye and hand of tlic master become to the young tree what instruction, counsel and admoni tion are to a growing boy, with the difference that the tree is easily aud cer tainly managed when taken in time. Trees left to themselves tend to form too much wood, like the graic-viue. Of course line fruit is impossible when the head of a tree is ' like a thicket The growth of unchecked branches follows the terminal bud, thus producing long naked reaches of wood devoid of fruit spurs. Therefore the need of shorten ing iu, so that side branches ma' be developed. When the reader remem bers that every dormant bud in early spring is a iossible branch, and that even the immature buds at the axil of of the leaves in early summer can be forced into immediate growth by pinch ing back the leading shoot, lie will see how entirely the young tree is under his control. Thesa simple facts ami princi ples are worth far more to the intelli gent man than any number of arbitrary rules as to the pruning. Reason and observation om guide his hand in sum mer, or his knife in March, the season when trees are usually trimmed. Beyond shortening in leading branch es and cutting out crossing and inter fering boughs, so as to keep the head symmetrical and open to light and air, the cherry does not need very mudlr pruning." If with the lape of years it becomes necessary to take off large limbs from any fruit-tree, the authori ties recommend early June as the best season for the operation. E. P. Roe, in Harper's Magazine for April. ? - - . Two College Stories. ? Some interesting situations have. come up 'at Harvard apropo&'iof the enforce ment of "involuntary prayers.'- The other day a party of four youug meu, with dark hair aud slightly-aquiline noses, picked fellows among the stu dents, waited upon the dean of the faculty aud asked to be excused from chapel in the morning, on the ground that they were Jews ami had religious scruples against attending Christian services. The good doctor knew bhe ap plying students by sight only, and, as lie made a memorandum of their re quest, casually asked their names. Aft er he had put them down, his tablet run something like this: Solomon Isaac Lowe. Abram Grcenbauer, Moses J. Stern, Jacob Fried burger. It struck the conserver of moral discipline that it was a little extraordinary that he had not heard of this Hebrew quartet: so, though he granted them the required leave of absence from praj'ers, he looked into the matter, and found, of course, that this was only another expedieut of godless youth to "cut chapel." This reminds the historian of a stor' of his juvenage. A young collegian of his acquaintance was called up for a reprimand before his college president He had made up a concatenation of words to explain away the misdemeanor for which he was reproved, but his statement had not the desired effect on the professor. "Young man," said that worthy sol emnly, "is it possible that you really ex pect nio to believe such a lot of non sense? Can you look me in the eye and repeat what you have been saying?" The graceless youth looked up uon cnalantly, and inquired: "Which eye, bir?" Boston Record. Gouverneur Morris. Gouverneur Morris is by no means so well known to the present generation as he ought to be. Perhaps it would be more accurate to say that he has not been and is not justly appreciated. If, however, we turn to M. Taine's great work on the French Revolution, we find that he relics on Morris as one of the bast and most penetrating observers of that great struggle and places him at the head of the small group of men like Arthur Young, Malouet and Mallet du I'au, who alone were able to record clear and dispassionate judgments in that diz zy time, for the benefit of Ksterity. The comments of Mr. Morris, thus rescued from his biography and brought before a wide public bv M. Taiue, already have attracted attention elsewhere, and a re cent article in Macmillaii's Magazine shows how striking his criticisms aud narrative really arc Such a prophet should never be without honor in his own country, aud now that he is winning admiration in England and France per haps it would not oe amiss to refresh our own memories in regard to him. It is not to be wondered at that M. Taine and others find so much that is admirable in Gouverneur Morris, for in him many high qualities met in a rare combination. A man of the world aud of society, a wit, philosopher, and fine fentlcmau, he was also a bold and ar ent patriot an able and most practi cal statesman, a distinguished lawyer, and a successful manager of large busi ness affairs. He played a conspicuous pail among the many eminent men of his da', but in one respect he differs from them all. He had a shaip wit a strong sense of humor, aud a capacity for amusing satire which are to be seen in all his writings. If we except Frank lin, who was of an earlier generation, Gouverneur Morris holds in this respect a lonely pre-eminence among his friends and contemporaries. The great men of our revolutionary and constitutional period were, it must be confessed, judg ing from their letters and journals, somewhat ponderous. Now and then we find a moment when we can laugh at them, but Morris is the only one of them all with whom we laugh or smile in sympathy. This is enough of itself to make us hold him in remembrance, but he was far more than merely an amusing companion or a writer of clever letters. Henry Cabot Lodge, in April Atlantic. Brother-In-Ijaw. He It was natural, you know, that I should )c attracted to you. She (shyly) Indeed! Why? He Well, you know, that your brother studied law in the same office with me, and we were admitted to the bar together. She But what has that got to do with me? He Why, don't you see, I looked upon him as a brother iu law? She (blushing) Oh! I see. He Yes, a brother in law dejure as it were. Now I propose that he shall be a brother-in-law dc facto as well. Then he slipped the engagement ring on her finger and their heads came close together, and the parian Cupid on the mantel .looked as if he was about tc clap his wings and crow. Boston Courier. m i David Siton, Ohio's richest man, is a Scotch-Irishman, and grew up around the big iron mills of Pittsburg. He be gan business as a clerk in a country store at $4 a month; then was a clerk in a blast furnace, afterward manager, and at last half owner. After that the ad vance in wealth was fast He is worth $12,000,000, and gives largely to public charities. The Comstock lode has been ton depth of S.200 feet, end 1 dgoed about $850,000,000. worked m pro- GIFT OF SPEECH. An Arconplishraeat Which. If Not Natural. May Be Cultivated. Probably, my son, you never consid ered how important a thing it is in life to use language with felicity and copi ously. I purpose showing you. by a couple of examples, how appeti.ingly a dish of fact may be garnished by the flowers of speech. Here is a bald, uninteresting matter of fact statement: "As I came down town this moraine, I saw a man run down by a hcrdic. He was not hurt, but his clothing was badly soiled." Now there is nothing attractive in this statement It is juicelcss, spirit less, inartistic. See howthe same materials can be made intensely-interesting: "By blowpipe! I witnessed a con deuiuationed narrow escape this morn ing. Great. Zeus! but I thought the incarnadined fool was booked for Hades, for sure! He was just ahead of me. d'ye sec, and the man, by stove-lifter! must have been blind or asleep. An uusanctitied herdic came careering down the street, by pens and scissors! and just as the anathema got half-way over the crossing, by "pianaforte! the herdic, by curtain fixtures! came on to him, by elm tree! pell nu-ll. and, in an instant, by tobacco! he was down on his marrow-bones, by collar-buttons! aud the horse almost on top of him. by check-rein! The fellow wasn't hurt, but, by Boston Common! he got a con demned dusting, by sealiug-wa! and he looked, by pocket-knife! as though, by cuspidore! as though, by garden sass! he had been wallowingin ahorsc- pond. by locomotive and a train of cars! all his natural life, by primrose and I fi in There, that is something like. You have the same story, but embellished and beautified into a real work of art. A few oaths interspersed into the com monest narrative will enliven it won drously. There is much virtue in an oath. Again: You are called upon to make a speech. You have nothing to say, therefore you remark to this effect: "Mr. Chairman I am no public speaker; and if I were. I have nothing to say. Therefore I beg to be excused from attempting to nu.ilce a speech. Thanking you for calling upon me. I will, with your permission, now resume my seat." That is what you would say; but an orator would express the same idea in language befitting and eloquent. For instance: "Mr. Chairman Utterly and irrevo cably unaccustomed and unused as 1 am to mount and ascend the raised and elevated rostrum and to dispense and give forth thence glowing, glittering and resplendent streams of speech, rounded and rotund periods of elo quence ami ornamental and ornate ora tory, I am especially and particularly unfortunate and unhappy at this time and moment in not having any thing to talk about, to speak of or even to men tion. Hence and therefore, Mr. Chair man, I beg and supplicate and pray to be excused and pardoned and forgiven if, Mr. Chairman, I neither attempt nor essay, nor yet endeavor, to speak or talk upon this occasion or at this time or in this presence; but that I may be permitted and allowed, both at this time and upon this occasion, to be ex cused and exempted from making, manufacturing or constructing any re marks of any Kind whatsoever, or from uttering, delivering or giving voice to iiiiv thoughts, cogitations or reflections. And, Mr. Chairman, returning and ex- tending my heartfelt thanks and good wishes to you, Mr. Chairman, for calling upon and requesting me to address this honored and honorable assemblage of honored aud honorable crentlemen, I will now and at this time, with your kind and graceful permission, your in- dulrence and vour well-known and universally recognized courtesy, re sume and retake the seat from which I ought never to have arisen, and which I ought never to have relinquished or left. Again thanking you, Mr. Chair man, for the honor you have bestowed upon and vouchsafed to oue who was never fitted to flourish in the luxuriant fields of oratory, I once more sink and descend into the obscurity and insig nificance from which I ought never to have emerged or ventured forth." This is oratory; this is eloquence. Copy this style of speaking, my sen, and you will s oon acquire nauie -and fame as a public speaker. Ami to you, my daughter. I have a word to say. Instead of simply say ing: "I saw Sue to-day, but she didn't have anything particular to say;" Endeavor to cultivate that faculty of diffusive particularity so uncommon to your sex, aud deliver yourself in this wise: "I saw Sue to-day and, by the way, what a taste she has in bonnets oh! that reminds me of May Flcmington; she s got a lovely new wrap, and John Strut says you know John; his sister I :...! u l i l. .......... ...!... ! married Charley Black wonder what she ever saw iu Charley! I'm sure I never could endure him, he isn't a bit good-looking, and then he's so stupid what was I going to say? O, yes! John Strut; John says oh, Belle! have you seen John's new turnout? It is awfully nice. I was telling Kitt' only last night what a queer girl Kitty is! Did I ever tell you about the time she and I had last summer? " And so on indefinitely. I am aware that this perspicuous and delightfully varied style of speech is seldom acquired by females; but, my dear daughter, it is not so difficult, after some practice. Acquire it, by all means. Boston Tran script. ' TAKEN FROM LIFE. X Uow the Girl or the Period Receive At tentions From Her Many Suitor. At six o'clock her flowers came; at eight she and their sender were ffeing to a card party. "No, Jane, you need not open the box. Just peep in and see -what color they are, then put them in the refrigerator. Pink roses? Well, I will wear my new Chinese silk. I will sleep about an hour longer, then come and put up my back hair." Aud he had foolishly selected them with care and much expense. She did not even give them a glance, but closed her pretty eyes iu sweetest slumber, unthoughtful of the roses that had bloomed for her. That night she modestly thanked him and murmured something about his delicate little attention, etc.'; and he? Why, of course he believed her when she returned home with the Iirize, a bauble of beauty. She care essly removed them from over' her sordid little heart and told June that they would do to put in the window on the morrow. "For you know, Jane, mamma likes all the "flowers the gen tlemen have sent to be placed in the front window. She says it looks well, and shows that I am having attention, and I do have lots, don't I, Jane?" Three foolish men each tenderly lifted a pink rose from over his heart that night and thonght of his "dear, good girl" who had given'it Louis ville Commercial. Evidence of the decay of forests in Australia is found in the present ev'-t-encc of a few trees far exceeding in size any of those about them ami supposed to be survivors of a departed race of giants. A tree twenty-five feet in cir cumference at a height of thirty feet above -the ground was described at a late meeting of the Royal Society of New South Wales. MISCELLANEOUS. An American HvinginKobc, Japan, has cnirasrcd thirty very skillful Japa- nose ivory-carver.s to introduce the art into this country. I J. R. Bond, of Stewart County, f Ga., says that some of his neigh-! bors heard the train coming in the other night for the first time, and, mis- j taking the rumbling noise made by the i train for a cyclone, spent the night in their eyclone" pits. The locomotive headlight, which is so universally employed on railway engines in this country, is said to be losing favor among experienced rail way men. They regard it as of little or no utility, while its powerful illu mination tends to render indistinct the colors of signal lights on the track ahead. X. Y. Examiner. Richard W. Belmont, who was going from Denver to the Pueblo Insane Asy lum in charge of Sheriff Shrock, sprang through a car window when the train was running thirty miles an hour. When the train was stopped Belmont was seen running over the prairie un hurt. Shrock, after along chase, recap tured him. Chicago Mail. , When Thebaw and his retinue were landed as prisoners at Madras and turned over to a burly Scot on duty there, the officer who had brought them demanded a receipt The Scotchman Iiromptlv made it out somewhat as fol ows: "Received of Colonel Willoughby one king, two queens, thirteen maids of honor, etc.. as per invoice." With the foundering of the steamer Ferouia off the Dutch coast about 5,000,000,000 of sewing needles were lost, which had been shipped by four firms from Isarbohn fr China. Sev- i " """.ice couipamw uiusfc uur ' he damage which is very heavy i there having been a large quantity of expensive needles among the lot. ! A gentleman having surrendered ' his seat to a lady in the horse-cars, without the slightest recognition from her, drew an ear-trumpet from his , pocket, and held the open end close to her face. She was brought to her ' senses by this broad hint, and found she had occasion to get off at the next crossing. We intend to carry a trum pet hereafter. Prairie Farmer. A cotemporary says "many of our cooking utensils have remained the same for 1,800 years. We fry, bake and stew in pans formed precisely like those used in Pompeii and Hurcula neum. We even use the same shaped pans for eggs as were used in those cities long oefore the fateful eruption of Vesuvius buried them in ashes and iava." Happily the eggs we use in the pans are commonly a little less ancient. Chicago Sun. Mrs. Elizabeth Chambers, of Mis , souri, made her will in 1SG2, and be ; qucathed her slaves to her children equally, with the exception of one to whom she gave iler freedom. She lived a number of years afterward, but steadily refused to recognize the results of the'war and her will was admited to probate at St. Louis this week, just as it was originally written. But the slaves which she desired to divide among her children long since walked off on their own account. St. Louis Post. Henry L. Ebbccke, of Upper Naza reth township. Northampton County, Pa., is the owner of three horses, the like of which arc seldom found. One of the animals is thirty-eight years old, j another twenty-eight and the youngest I twenty-six, their combined ages making a total of ninety-two years. They are 1 the only horses Mr. Ebbccke owns and i all three are in constant use on that i gentleman's farm. Even the oldest is j still able to do a solid day's work, and all promise to be good for some years' service still. Philadelphia Press. A youthful theological student, so minute in stature that he ordinarilv C:in not make himself seen when behind the pulpit desk, recently preached near Exeter, N. II. An aged woman sat in the front pew, and was ! greatly concerned to see a boy in place of the expected nrnistcr. So she , slipped on tip-toe to the pulpit stairs I and beckoned to him, whispering loudly: "Come down, my boy; yon mustn't sit there; that's the place for the minister." Springfield (Mass.) Republican. m THE PERSIAN ARMY. The Help It Could Give England in a War with Ku.Hsia. I have of late been surprised (1) fit the orderly regularity of their camps; (2) at the fair show of discipline and neat ness of dress when on duty; (.'$) at the cleanliness of their rifles, which in the regular army are all breech-loaders, though not of the best ami latest pat terns; (4) at the intelligence and smart ness of some of their officers. There is now a military college at Teheran, at which the superior class of officers are instructed in branches of military edu cation similar to those taught at most European military academies. The in- ferior class of otlicers is drawn in the ... t jt. s.i.ii.. I i- maiu iroin ine iiuuuie tir iuwcr graues of the Persian people, and is as a rule by no means highly educated. Many of them, however, are capable and intelli gent; though others, and, I fear, the majority, are the very reverse. This class never, or hardly ever, rises above the grade of Yawar or Major. There are 80 battalions of Persian infantry, each nominally 1,000 strong. Perhaps we may be not far wrong it we assume the actual average strength of each to be 500, thus making a total of 40,000. The Shah has only three regiments of regular cavalry, drilled and disciplined by Russian officers on the Cossack sys tem. He has at Teheran several bat teries of artillery (guns of modern make) also under European officers, while scattered over his kingdom are a collection of antiquated pieces of ord nance worked by artillerymen more or less proficient in the duties they are called on to perform. To the above may be added an almost unlimited number of irregular cavalry, but very indifferently armed. Their arms are their weak point. They are good horsemen, well mounted on horses capable of enduring much hard work, ami are entirely imlcpendent of trans port and commissariat. A more mobile force could not be found, and, com posed as it is of Kurds, Turks, Bakhti aris, Hazaras, Jamshidis, and all the best and bravest fighting element of Persia, one not to be despised. Bnt it must be better armed in time of war. That portion of the Persian army which is under the Zill-us-SuItan at "Isfahan has a good name for drill, discipline, and general efliciency." All considered, then, we should be justified in placing somewhat greater faith in the eflic&cy of Persian military resources than most recent writers have displayed. I would not argue that a Russian corps d'armec marching on Teheran would be likely to find the Persian forces more than a match for it; but in the event of a war between England and Russia it would be a great advantage to the former if the latter were obliged to detach a corps d'armee, whether to watch the Persian frontier or to repel a Persian attack. Moreover, with a hostile Persian on her right flank, the operations of Russia from the Caspian via Askabad and Sarakhs against Herat would be, if not paralyzed, at least seriously ham pered. Let not, then, England despise a Persian alliiucc. But, be it remem bered, that alliance will be conditional upon the successful debarkation of a British army in the Caucasus which saeans Turkish co-operation and probably, also on the presence of a powerful force from India at Herat, Jfationai Mtvitw. SCHOOL AND (2HURCH. Rudolph Albrccht's university at Vienna is the largest in Europe. It has 285 professors and 5,221 students. The average age of those who enter college in this country is seventeen; a century ago it was fourtycn.CAicttyo Inter Ocean. l'hc average salary of the Metho dist preachers of the Baltimore Con ference is 9t&j a year, bixty preachers, some of them .married, receive less than this amountand one receives only $160. Baltimore Sun. The Rev. C. S. Sargent, of New Haven, t., has given to the Congrega tionalist a cheering description of a work of the Holy Spirit. He says: "The churdhes of the Chap lain Malley arc experincing a work of grace aud an outpouring of the Spirit such as has not been known for fifty years." The Christian Advocate states that during the past three mouths upward of oue hundred thousaud persons in the Methodist Episcopal denomination have "responded to the appeals of pas tors and friends, and professed to give their hearts to God, through Christ, and their names as candidates for ad mittance into the Christian Church." Simultaneous meetings held at the same da' aud the same hour, for the purpose of advancing the interests of the missionary societies of the church, are frequent in Eagl.md. and the Epis copal Recorder thinks they might be in troduced into this country with advant age, and, moreover, that an entire week should be devoted to the cause of missions. Since the accession of Pope Leo XIII. forty-four Cardinals have died. Of the Cardinals created by Pope Pius IX. twenty-six are still living, the re maining thirty-four have beeu created by Leo XIII. There are now ten va cancies in the Sacred College. Cardi nal Newman is the oldest of the Cardi nals. There are now 1,203 dignitaries in the Roman Catholic hierarchy. The vast work that is being done bv the four great Bible and Tract soci eties of this country and of England is hardly understood or appreciated by the public. The daily issues of the two Bible societies was 18,213 for each work ing day of 18S.J. The total issues of these two societies for 1S85 reached the enormous number of f,70!,207 copies of the Scriptures. These are startliug figures. Brooklyn Eaqle. -The attention of the Catholic Church is beginning to be attracted to Alaska as a promising missionary field. The country is vast and the population estimated a"t 70,000, but in all that ter ritory there are but two priests. Thi state of affairs is likely to be soon reme died. Archbishop Segbers. of Oregon City, having given up his see for tlu purpose of taking the field in the ardu ous missionary labor in Alaska. iY. Y Timet. The American missions of South Africa have recently celebrated theit fiftieth anniversary at the oldest mis sion station, which is named after it? revered founder. Dr. Adams. The Lieutenant Governor of Natal, Sir Charles Mitchell, was present and the Hags of England and America waved together in the breeze. He expressed, iu his speech, the hearty sympathy of the Government with the work of the missionaries, which has been so suc cessful in that part of the world. The great feature of the celebration was the opening of Jubilee Hall, which is the name that has been given to the ne seminary for boys. PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS A cigarette-smoking dude is as much like . ... w - i man as .hi opera bonffe i& like an opera, lie is merely a thin and amusing burlesque. Fall River Ad vance. In order to distinguish one frota the other, the dinner-plate must be made smaller or the fashionable button affected by the ladies must be slightly enlarged. Chicago Tribune. Patient "Well, doctor, what dc you lind ails me?" Doctor "I can'4 tell just yet. Mr. Peters. I am afraid 2 shall have to diagnose your case more thoroughly before I can tell you." Pa tient "Say, doctor, will it hurt?' Tid-Bits. It will bo remembered that "Old Uncle Ned" laid down the ihovel and the hoe, and hung up the fiddle and the bow. Probably if Ned had stuck to the shovel and the hou he would uot have been compelled to "hang up" hit fiddle and bow. There ia a moral here. Puck: Miss D. "O, I assure you that the doctor's wife is very untidy. Why. she can not cook or govern her servants and her children are badly brought up. Ah! she deceives her excellent husband." Mr. C. "How do vou know this so well?" Miss D. How? Don't you know I'm her beat friend?" Pitts burgh Chronicle. First Dealer "So they are going to pass a law forbidding the sale of tobacco to miners." Second Ditto "Yes, but I don't see how that is going to interfere with our business so longas we stick to the favorite brands cab bage leaves and old shoe leather, you know." Boston Transcript. Rev. Mr. Slytcs, of Bungton, (to usher in up-town church) Will you show me a pew, please ? Usher You can take any one of the back pews, sir. Rev. Mr. Slytes But I am the Rev. Mr. Slytes, of Bungton. Usher That don't make any difference, sir. The back pews can be occupied by any one who behaves himself. X. Y. Times. Young Wife I am" going to be very economical. Do you know I bought liver to-day for dinner? Young Husband I suppose you bought some bacon to cro with it. Young Wife O, no! Couldn't afford it, but I bought you a necktie and nryself a love of a bonnet for only twenty-eight dollars. Now, wasn't I good? Young Husband (groaning inwardly) Yes, very. Bos ton Globe. "No," said Fogg, "I'm tired of go ing out visiting, if I call on Brown he s sure to bore me to death with his everlasting brag about his dog; if I go to Black's, he'll talk of nothing but that confounded horse of his; and at White's I shall hear of nothing but his hens. Therefore I prefer to stay at home and enjoy myself. "But, my dear," interposed Mrs. F., "the con versation will hardly be more improv ing if, as usual, youdilatc on pipes and tobacco." "Yes, my love, replied Fogg, "but you should remember the difference. I do the talking." Boston Transcript. m A HARD FATHER. How He Abased the Confidence ef Hl Daughter' Admirer. The clock was on the stroke of twelve and old man Stuffey was awakened by muffled voices in the hall below. "Wife," he said, "what is that?" "It's Sary and her young man," re plied the wife. " 'Tain't morning, is it?" he asked. "I don't know what time it is." "I will sec about this," he said, get ting up and putting on his boots. In a few minutes his wife heard a dull thud down stairs, and shortly after the old man returned. "I am not an astronomer," he said, "and I can not explain it, but I saw the son rise a few moments ago, and it is now midnight." Then he looked reflectively down at the toe of his boot, took them both off, blew ont the light and west back to bat Merchant Traveler. THE BEST Ixkhi evi - in.Mm'rd i:;;!i iir:: N jHjrftvt iu ail li, ::.,.: 'v :.-up way to hi :-v health is to j:s f '; ysiur !ol v s a A n's S;n-si-uri!!:i. km. VXir.x A. Clou::!'. "A rvz ton s:., I.v.v;!. Jltiv.. wrilf.-: "Every winter" ami ;t5hz my family, isicltnlini; III self, Un: .j.-.-il hrtt:i,"iOf AwrN ?:ir :i;:irlll:i. lTvj.rrieare l:a- -uyinvl mu tli:ii..is't ;fwirfii: 3ioGd l-ariiltc. i: i.. ery much i:j-sTlr t any other prcfiinith'U of S:ir-:i;:irii!::. A.I jKTMiu- i i'rotuiu or oon--!iiiijt:e teti il Jii, atj.l especially delicate !:;Mr, . arc Mire In lv greatly beiniitil lv?i:s n-.'.' I. W. Hlarr, Liiruuia, It.ua, wjjjfi " !or year-: 1 was troubk-d with .-f:i-Joi:s vuiiinkiiuN. X tried sewrsd illi&r M irejiarati.in, which did ir.e !ii.:ii' . tr!. Two ;t!es of Aver's STr:ii -i- villa eir.eliil opinion tl::. lt:xil n I'OiupK-te e.::e, V. i. lt:V i ills nyuiL'llie is Ke U-t Purifier of the !...' C I!. I'jit ,.:i. NaMtt:.:. X. !., utiles: J-or a i.i.n.Ir i.f i .-.: i wax troidiVd vi;h a humor in my ee, :i:ii mi:.b!e to oi;:!!l: re'.;, f tm'.ii I -joiu-:u.ifeI ulii!X Ajei's Sar-ai'Miil-a. I hae tai.en v'.'eral hUHt", :n r. ally ber.e lid il, and hclietf ii to Ik- !!: br-l of h'o.tl lti!;ii.-i-.' II. i?ir:;. Cu-eJ t'itv.IIim-ey .., fMnola, u.ite.: ' I h..- he.-n an niieiiM" MilVeivr, il!i I:vsi-r-iu. for the ;.:i-t three year-;. Six ino!ith ao I hey.n to U"l AYER'S Sarsaparilla It has eiseliil an entiiv cure, ami I nut lw ; Will a ever.'' SoM by all Drus.'M. I'rice $1; Six bottles, $,". I'reosivd by Dr. I. C. Aver .t V.. Lou el! JIa., l S. A. '1'IIF. OMAHA & CHICAGO SHORT xuxsfs: . Ml Railway. THE BEST ROUTE FromOJIAllA TO THE EAST, Two Trains Daily lirtwten (Ininlia Chicago, ani Milwaukee, St. Paul, Minneapolis, Cedar Rapids, Clinton, Dubuque, Davenport, Rock Island, Freeport, Rockford, Elgin, Madison, Janesville, Beloit, Winona, La Crosse. Aral all other Important I'oiuts K:i.st, Northeast and Southeast. For through tickets call on the Aijent at Columbus, Nebraska. Ticket 1'ullman Slkki-kks mid the Kinkst Dinino Oaks in tiik Vokli are run on the main lines of the Ctii;ng;o 1111 waiikec & Nl. lul Ky, mid every attention is paid to passengers by cour teous employe.- of the Company. It. Miller. A. V. II. Carpenter, General Man gcr. Ueii'l Pass. Agt. J. V. Tackrr, Asi'tCen'l .Man. CSt'u. II. IIalTortl, As't Pass. Ag't. J. ''. 17-1 Clark, Cen'l Sup't. Feb, LOUIS SCHBEIBEK, Bill All kinds of Repairing done ou Short Xoti:e. Buggies, Wag ons, etc., made to order, and all work Guar anteed. Also sell the world-famous Walter A. Wood Mowers. Reapers, Combin ed Machines, Harvesters, and Self-binders the best made. ISrShop opposite the Ttterall." on olive hi., i fi.iiMiir-- ;. A copy of thin Buperb Work of Art will bo mailed to any addrciw ou receipt ot ten cents. TTTJ1T Tfor working people. Send 10 H Hi I i I cents postage, aud we will J, I., I i I JJ- ,naj you free, a loyal, val uable sample box of goods that will put vou in the wav of making more money in a few days than you ever thought pos sible at "any busiucs. Capital not re quired. You can live at home and work in spare time only, or all the time. All of both sexes, of all ages, grandly suc cessful. SO cents to $5 easily earned every evening. That all who want work may test the business, we make this un paralleled otTer: To all who are not well satisfied we will send $1 to pay for the trouble of writing us. Full particulars, directions, etc., sent free. Immense pay absolutely sure for all who start at once. Don't delay. Address Stixsox & Co., Portland, Maine. HewspapER A book of 100 page. The best book for an advertiser to con sult, be be experi enced or otherwise. flDVERTlSlHQ Itcoiitttinslistsornewspapcrsandestlmatea ofthecostof advert Isinfr-Theadvertiserwho wants to spend one dollar. Amis in Uthe In formation he requires; while forhim who will invest one hundred thousand dollars in ad vertising, a scheme is indicated which will meet his every requirement, or can bewtade to dotobf tight changes tatay arrivtdat bycor respondenee. 119 editions have been issued. Sent, post-paid, to any address for 10 cents. Write to MEO. F. HOWELL & CO., NEWSPAPER ADVERTISING BURKAU. U0SpnM4t.PriBUBff HouM8q.h Nw York. no Blacksmith anflWimouMaKer ISrVSffflKvK93I UNION PACIFIC LAND OFFICE, S Altt. C. SMITH, Ag't. -ASD- General fieal Estate Dealer. J3"I have a lare number of improved Farms for auIc cheap. Alio uniinproveil farming and grazing lands, fiom $1 to $15 per acre. EITSpecial attention paid to making linal proor on Homestead and Timber Ol.tims. EST a II having lands to sell will Bud it to their advantage to leave them in my bauds lor sale. .Mouey to loan on farms. K. 11. Marty, Clerk, peak Oerman. ""-If Columbu, Nehrask t. FREE LAND! KOK FARMERS & STOCKMEN lust hrvoiid the Nehra.-tki Platte Uiver. line on the The Country is Wonderfully j;- Productive. . Cheap Lands lor sale is the vicinity of the lively town of Sterling. Grand Openings for all kinds of Buai ness. Present population of Town 500. 23T3ci:d for circulars to PACKARD & KINO, 2X-y Sterling, Weld "o., Colorado. ESTABLISHED IN I860. tiii-: WASHING l'ON l. C. Dally, evcept Sundays, l'ricc, ij.tw jier 3 car in advance, postage free. -TIIK WEEKLY UT10IM BEHLICM. 1'evoted to tre'ieral news and oriiiri! matter ohtaiucd trom the Department ut Agriculture Hint other Uepai tmeiits ot the (ioveriuueiit, relating to the farming and plantiur interests. An Advocate of Uepublicau principles, reviewing fearlessly aud fairly the :icts of Congres and the National "Adminis tration. I'rice, $1.00 per year in advance, postage tree. E. X. FOX, President and Manager. The National Republican and the Columbus .Journal, 1 year, $2.60. 32-x Cures Guaranteed! DR. WARN'S SPECIFIC No. 1. A Certain Cure for Nervous Debilitv, Seminal Weakness, Involuntary Emis sions, Spermatorrhea, and all diseases of the geiiito-uriuary organs caused lr self abuse or over indulgence. Price, $1 00 per box, six boxes $5.00. DR- 'WARNS SPECIFIC No. 2. For Epileptic Fits, Mental Anxiety, Loss of Memory, Softening of the Brain, and all those diseases of the brain. 1'rwe $1.1H per box, six boxes $."5.00. DR. WARNS SPECIFIC No. 3. For Impotence, Sterility in either sex. Loss of Power, premature old age, and all those diseases requiring a thorough in vigorating of the sexual organs. Price $2.00 per box, six boxes $10.00. DR. WARNS SPECIFIC No. 4. For Headache, Nervous Neuralgia, and all acute diseases of the nervous system. Price f0e per box, six boxes $i50. DR. "WARN'S SPECIFIC No. 5. For all diseases caused by the over-u.-e of tobacco or liquor. This remedy is par ticularly efficacious in avertiug palsy and delirium tremeus. Price $1.00 per 'iox, six boxes $3.U0. We Guarantee a Cure, or agree to re fund double the money paid. Certilicate in each box. This guarantee applies to each of our live Specifics. Sent by mail to any address, secure from observation, on receipt of price. Be careful to mention the number of Specific wanted. Our Specifics are only recommended for spe cific diseases. Beware of remedies war ranted to cure all these diseases with one medicine. To cvoid counterfeits and al ways secure tnS genuine, order only from DOWTJc CHlttX, DRUGGISTS, Columhu. Neb. !!)-! Health is Wealth! 2Cil u. I brau I Bb E. C. Iter's Nditb jwd Bhact Totat- c HINT, a guaranteed specific for Hysteria, Dizzi ness, Convulsions, Fits. Bierroa Neuralgia, .. , Headache, Nervous Prostration caused by the usa " ot alcohol or tobacco. Wakefulness, Mental Do pressiou. Bof tenin of tho Urain resulting lain aTiitr and leading to misery, decay and death. Prematura Old Ar. Barrenness, Loss of power in cithor box. Involuntary Looses and Bpercaat orrhcea caused byover-exertion ot tho brain, self abuse or over-indulgence. Each box coutainsi one month's treatment. $lXOa box.orsixboie forS&GU. sent by mail prepaidou receipt of prico. WE GUARANTEE SIX BOXES To cure any case. With each order received by as for six boxes, accompanied with S5JXX wo will send the purchaser oar written guarantee to re fund the money if the treatment doMBOteffiCl . euro. Guarantees jsaoed only by JOHN O. WEST & CO, 862 W. MADISON ST., CHICAGO, ILLS.. Solo Prop's West's Liver Pilla. in presents given away. Send us 5 cents postage, uuu ami oy man you will get free a package of goods of large value, that will start you in work that will at once bring you' in money faster than any thing else in America. All about the $'JOO,000 in presents with each box. Agents wanted everywhere, of either sex, of all ages, for all the time, or spare time only, to work for us at their owa homes. Fortunes for all workers ab solutely assured. Don't delay. II. Hal utt & Co., Portland, Maine. SSOO REWARD! -m .,... .. j. f .... ,.. fcr tVrT'i"-w"-iViin nintiin rmiHiTMitrwiinM m, caaart cut with We Vfgattbfe tint WU, wkm IW m ttocxm (trim? eomfitd wtta. TWywfwIy TrgiftKnil mrbn to gin mutation. fegarCMteo. !( kom.coa. Ula!r( 9 fillets cota. WW ? aU dnfxfeu. Btwaraot-. 525?ttflJ,ri,,kll,fc "n aBficlaia mtT MtUfC. WEST ACQ, ttl to W. Mateo SL. Cklaf. l"'T""'I'IIIIHWIMCIIBltltft TTTTTVT more money than at anything W I I e'"e D? taking an agency for ' --J-' the best selling book out. Be. ginners succeed grandly. None fall. Terms free. Uaixbtt Book Co.. Pert land, liaise. l-h-j Mnn nnn i t I e r i , vr..- ' Z " 5- ."jvr -