Nebraska Newspapers

    . T."X l-if
THE JOURNAL.
ISSUED 2VKRY WZDKrSDAT,
m. e:. TrrRisrER & co.
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VOL. XT.-N0. 4T.
COLUMBUS, NEB., WEDNESDAY. MAKCH 18, 1885.
WHOLE NO. 775.
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autumbtis
V mWLmW nmmU
BssM BsssuM BssssLT
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COLUMBUS
STATE BANK!
COLTKBUS, EB.
CASE CAPITAL, - $75,000
DIRECTORS:
LeAXDER GKBRAED,'PrC'i.
Geo. W. Htjlst, Vice Pres't. .
Julius A. Reed.
R. H. Henry.
J. E. Taskeu, Cashier.
Baik DepMit, DIscasuat
aad. Eichaace.
Callectieas Promptly Slavde
all Point.
Pay Imterewt TIaee Depos
it.. 27
HENRY G-ASS,
UNDEETAXER I
COFFINS AND METALLIC CASES
AND DEALER IN
Farnltnre, Chain, Bedsteads, Bu
reaus, Tables, Safes. Lounges,
&c, Picture Frames and
Mouldings.
XSTRepairing of all kinds of Upholstery
Goods.
6-tf COLUMBUS, XEB.
HENRY LITERS,
DEALER IX
WIND MILLS,
AND PUMPS.
Buckeye Mower, combined, Self
Binder, wire or twine.
Pomps Repaired on short lotiee
JSTOne door west of Heintz's Drug
Store, 11th Street, Columbus, Neb. 8
Tl I ."IT TVor working people. Send 10
H Pi I 1 1 cent' Pstase, and we will
J-LJ-IAJ-L mail you free, a royal, val
uable sample box of goods that will put
you in the way of making more money in
a few days than you ever thought pos
sible at "any business. Capital not re
quired. You can lire st home and work
in spare time only, or all the time. All
of both sexes, of "all aees, grandly suc
cessful. f0 cents to $5 easily earned
everv evening. That all who want work
mav test the business, we make this un
paralleled offer: To all who are not well
satisfied we will send $1 to pay for the
trouble of writing us. Full particulars,
directions, etc, sent free. Immense pay
absolutely sure for all who start at once.
Don't delay. Address Stixson & Co.,
Portland, Maine.
23. .A. FOWLER,
ARCHITECT,
15C5 "tai St,, - CSAHA, JTCJ.
PLANS AND SPECIFICATIONS FURNISHED
for all kinds of Public Buildings and
Private Dwellings. Architect of "Willard
Block, Child's Hospital, Residence of
Hon. J. M. Thurston, Residence o Hon.
John I. Redick, Omaha; Residence of
Hon. G. "W. E. Dorsey, Masonic Hall,
Fremont, Neb; Residence of C. C. Crow
ell, Esq., First National Bank, Blair,
Vh RpslriAnpp of Thos. Brvant. First
BsSbs
t National Bank, Schuyler, Neb., and ma
ny otners. -mo
A 1TOKD OF WAKTCVC.
FARMERS, stock raisers, and all other
interested parties will do well to
remember that the "Western Horse and
Cattle Insurance Co." of Omaha is the
only companv doing business in this state
that insures Horses, Mules and Cattle
against loss by theft, accidents, diseases,
or injury, (as also against loss by fire and
lightning). All representations by agents
of ether Companies to the contrary not
withstanding. P. W. HENRICH, Special Agt,
15-y Columbus, Neb.
NO HUMBUG!
But a Grand Success.
RP. BRIGHAM'S AUTOMATIC T7A-
terTroush for stock. He refers to
every man who has it in use. Call on or
leave orders at George Tale's, opposite
Oehlrich's grocery. 9-6m
rristA-fSIT HOUSE,
PLATTE CENTER NEB.
J0K5 BtGGAX,
Frearietsr.
The best accommodation for the travel
ing public, guaranteed. Food good, and
plenty of it. Beds clean and comfortable,
charges low, as the Is west. 13-y
AT"Tj TrTTJl Send six cents for
I Mi I fi VI Pstage,and receive
J. -LILLZJAJ. freej a costly box of
goods which will help you to more mosey
right awav than anything else-in this
world. Ail, of either sex, succeed from
first hour. The broad road to fortune
opens before the workers, absolutely
sure. At once address, Tkux A Co..
Augusta, Maine.
LYON&HEALY
State kkm ts..cirf
TOmlliillilUnT
BAND CATALOOUC,
lsa. r00 m. U
maa sbi, up mm.
Stu4k rtca MpSSB.
mat. DUKIIi U-U
gl . BMJ (JBXBBi
(nAaKnraukWt
3am ucnoa imwh -
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THE jCAOSC OF IT
'Ml 1st sat ttSe?ss Udbi
'Sfttd,
waothesttlfal story wss tellin,
riiiili1rrii1mlrii antathlatrad
'As vom sear aataatve, rm
And umu tkest lata a aulow.
Indsuplaff
ana over xaeaa soon i wui tee
. . .. . r
nods.
Like a plume, the cOBveimosal willow.
-Oh. res. he was killed bran editor's
Killed lsstanuy. too, that s a fact.
And scarcely a paper In all the broad las
But laughs at the terrible act.
"The cause? Oaly tats, tae Hnrertsaai
wight
Was one of the type-setting' throng
Who always Insist upon spaUing words
right
Which writers spell purposely wrong-.
. Boston CoMrisr.
"BAIL UP, THEBEr
jl Thrilling Experience in the Aus
tralian Bush.
"In 18 I was Deputy Governor of
Melbourne Gaol, and, upon oae occa
sion, hiving important business which
called me to Geelong, booked my place
on the mail- car, which was the only
public conveyance available, and took
my seat on the box on one of those de
liriously balmy mornings 'so- eotomon
in that country' but little "experienced
here.
There were but three passengers, the
car-driver and guard, and we rattled
along at a brisk pace, conversing freely
upon various topics. Among others,
the vexed question of "Free Trade rs.
Protection" supplied us with ample ma
terials for animated discussion. Being
a stanch Radical in politics I was elo
quent in favor 'of the former, and di
lated freely upon theC-namerous ad
vantages enjoyed by the "old country"
in consequence thereof, winding up my
peroration by standing up, waving-say
pocket handkerchief and shoutmg-Jat
the top of my voice, "free trade for
ever," when bang pingping What
could be the matter? We were not
kept Ions: in suspense,-fbr. two -men.
suddenly emerged from the bush with
the cry which ' sentea .v thrilL
of horror to the heart of many a trav
eler in these regions, "Bail up, there:"
which is equivalent to the old highway
men's challenge, "Your money or your
life:" The car-driver mechanically
pulled up his "horses, evidently fearing s
repetition of the revolver practice,
which might not prove so harmless as
the first, but I, perhaps more from long
acquaintance with the class of men by
whom we were assailed than from in
difference to danger, seized the reins
and whip from the paralyzed driver and
lashed the horses into a furious gallop.
"Ping! ping!" went the bullets most
unpleasantly close to our ears; how
ever, we were getting well beyond their
reach, and every bound of the in
furiated animals carried us further from
danger, when to our dismay, one of the
wheelers stumbled badly, and was by
reason of the great speed at which we
were going unable to regain his footing,
and after a short but desperate struggle,
fell heavily. We hastened to dismount
in hopes of getting the poor animal
upon his legs and starting again before
the robbers coulil come up with us,
but we were disappointed, for we were
soon overtaken by them. The first, a
powerful man seized me roughly by the
throat, and, presenting a revolver to
my head, coolly informed me that,
upon my making the slightest resist
ance, he would blow out my brains,
and, suddenly releasing me Jrom his
iron grasp, he, still keeping 'the re
volver to my head, drew, another with
his disengaged hand and "covered"
my companions generally with it, with
the remark that his friend would now
proceed to "business," at the same
time jocosely intimating that, prob
ably, my political opinions had under
gone a sudden change, and that I
might w.ant a little "protecBon,,
which pleasantry, being so mucbto the
point, notwithstanding the- serious as
pect of affairs, caused a general langh
at my expense. ".Business w.is
quickly proceeded with by bushranger
No. 2 binding the carrdriverand guard,
whom he then assisted to mount the
car, after which he performed similar
kind offices for the other two passen
gers, mv turn coming last, for the
reason, 1 think, that the robbers de
tected my intention to avail myself of
the slightest relaxation of watchful
nes on their part to make a sadden
and determined resistance, an inten
tion I certainly had, but 'which was
effectually frustrated by the close at
tention paid me by hinTof the two re
volvers. Being all aboard, the first bushranger
took the reins, the other keeping guard
over us with the dreaded weapons,-and
we found ourselves being hurried, away
in the direction of the Geelong sands.
Arrived there the quondam car-driver
alighted, deliberately unharnessed .the
horses, and we were one by one assisted
from the car and bound, some to the
wheels, others to the pole of the car,
"spread-eagle fashion." The robbers
now-proceeded tojrifeour pockets of
everything .valuable,- and next to open
the mail bags,, confiscating numerous
tetterajcontaiming notes andwantoaly.de
stroyiao: valueless ones (from their point
of view). HaTing- taken everything
which they could, without risk. of. dis
covery, turn into money, they prepared
to depart, each one takuur a horse, .and
were speedily out of sight. Our delight
bodily harm was changed-to alarm far
mure serious than any we had yet ex
perienced, for we became aware of ,a
fearful peril hitherto, in the excitement
of the occasion, overlooked by us alL
The tide was rising rapidly, and would
shortly, without doubt, engulf us. So
tightly were we bound that struggling'
was unavailable, and only rendered us
more miserable. On and on came the
waters, until now and again a large '
wave would actually touch our feet.
Oh. horror! who but ourselves can
imagine the the torture of watching
those relentless waves which were to
drown us, slowly, surely! Miles away
from any "track," we were
not likely to be heard bv
man. "The birds seerred to' "mock
our misery as they gaily flew over our
heads, chattering to each other and en-
Cying the liberty for which we would
ive given all we possessed. . Shouting
was evidently useless. Yet we shouted;
screamed, yelled, frantically.. I think. I
was somewhat the calmest and tried to
console and soothe the others with the
thought that the water might not rise
ssfhcently high to overwhelm us entire
ty, but I being considerably taller than
By -companions in distress, they receiv
ed this soggeaton as a sort of ghastly
Joke andlangaed a bitter laugh: Water
au arouaa. qb nsutg, atux nsmgi. .u,was
bat too enaew tut ear wecst
were' sooa to he thIj rl With
thought of the dear oldkeeae in
la4. with
day whyldfcmaotre-
nsn or at least write; eae.jpraj'sr wsy
Godaadlgaveayallhafs m !,
what do we- hear! toIsbs, siaay.
ing? I it ddirmmP Ho. It cosaJ
-aearer and nearer, ua, loyi a noes
rounding the 11 prosaoatory to oar
right, and we distinctly hear the Tosses
of several yoang asser mmpmg. We
shout once snore. They evidently see
us, but do not appear to aaderstaad
our. position, - Belp! we cry again, and
are answered. They easckly arrived
and help to free as frost oar boads.
Instbictively we throw oarseivas
dewn on our knees sad thank Alstighty
God for so reaaarkable a dehveraaca.
Thea we'coasult upon the best course
to take, with the result that I take oae
of the remaining horses and the car
driver the other, he' sain; towards
Melbourne and I to Geelong
It was an uncomfortable ride enough,
L assure .you.. Wet through, excited.,
mounted on a raw-boned, bare-backed
coach horse which atuasbled about,
threatening to fall with me it every
few yards. Yet the feeling of relief
from my recent perilous posuioa was so
great that I forgot sty discosafort and
urged-on my blundering steed until I
arrived at Geeloag.
I had not been idle 'during say ride.
The fresh air had braced up my nerves
and Thad begun to think what clue 1
had to the robbers- .They were evi
dently ."made up" sad wore blouses so
that I could not tell whether they were
stout or spare. Moreover, they had on
crape masks." Suddenly I remembered
that while oae-af-theaVwas- investigat
ing the mail-bags oa bis knees, with his
back towards me, I had sees that his
boots were '"sprigged" with copper
"sprigs" or nails in a pecnihr nuaaer.
Here, thought T, "hi a clue," and I de
termined to follow it up. I according
ly sought the Chief .Inspector of Police
and explained the circumstance to him.
He, knowing me in my official capaci
ty, placed one of his men st my .service,
with whom I proceeded to several boot
makers and inquired whether they had
anv .knowledge of such'boots. None of
them- had. -"But.il- resasrked oae,
".they are capital cine; for from your
description I should think they are the
only pair in the colony."
Leaving the police office to follow out
certain instructions, I went to s hotel,
obtained a change of clothing, dined
and settled myself down for the evening
to ruminate over the events of the day
and form plans for future action, when
s tap at the door announced the arrival
of a messenger from one of the boot
makers, who desired to see me. Hasten
ing to the shop, I confronted the trades
man, who apologized for troubling me.
"But," said he, "I think I have seen
your man' look at these boots'' and
he handed .me the identical pa;r which
had so attracted me. He explained
that a man of gentlemanly appearance
had called on him and bought a pair of
boots, leaving- his old ones to ne re
paired, and kept until he should call for
them. SaTd he: "I got into conversa
tion with the man and found that he
was going to the theater to-sight. I
feared to send you a message whilst he
was here in case he should be suspicious.
So, having obtained this information I
waited until he had left, when I imme
diately sent for you."
This was indeed good news. I has
tened off to the police station and,' ac
companied by two officers in plain
clothes, proceeded to the theater. We
had not been there long before my at
tention was attracted to a figure in the
pit which seemed familiar to me, for al
though dressed differently from what he
had been on the previous occasion, of
our meeting, I felt sure from certain
peculiarities in his ssovements, which
would, perhaps, be very difficult to de
scribe, that this man was nose other
than Mr. Bushranger No. 1, with whose
revolver I had that morning been so inti
mate. "Presently I observed that he was
miHngr signs to some one in another
part of the house. Scarcely- had I atsde
up my mind to secure- the- first named
man than the second made tricks1 to
leave the theater. This circumstance
confirmed jne.and.wjtk. the aid.of.the
officers I secured ay man and conveyed
him to the police station.
a ex. morning roe police were active
ly engaged in searchingf or number two,
and one o.the body, very cleverly de
tected haa riding 'at the head "of s
"mob" of cattle, notwithstanding that
he had shaved his chin and completely
altered his dress.
, It were a long story to tell of the
hearing before the magistrate, the com
mittal and the trial; sutfiee it to say that
both men were found guilty. The man
I had arrested was sentenced to ten
years in irons, on the roads, the other
had to undergo a further trial for mur
der, for which he had long been wanted,
a price having been 'set upon his head.
He was executed. This man was none
other thanroe-nptoriou3-tehranger
MoTgan.-iy Jfoy, 'iaJJe-roi. Free
Press. A ., .
CRIMINAL- NEGLIGENCE.
TkXeklMsWayim trkfak
.-Car tor
Nothing, to the, minds of careful peo
ple. Is so sstoaiahing as the reckless
way in, which sense people care for the
necessary-poisons which are kept in
every .house. TustesR e these being in
a separate closet, or even on a separ
ate shelf, from the simple remedies in
the family pharmacy, they stand side
by side, in bottles of similar shape,
with the'xaost harmless drags. The re
sult of this method is that at short inter
vals the daily .papers record, verdicts of
"accidental poisoning.0 -Not long since,
a woman of intelligence and position
took, in. mistake lor a- mineral water
which she was is the -habit- of takiag
each morning, a most -deadly poison,
and died in agony in a few hours. The
poison bad been put in s bottle" which
had formerly contained "the ' mineral
water. A name gave a three-montas,-old
baby corrosive sublimate for pot
ash, and the baby died after hours of
intense suffering. A mother gave a
daughter carbolic acid for a ,medicins
left by s physician, sad .only by almost
superhuman efurts was her- life- saved.
In all the" cases the sulerms; and deaths
were caused by .the criminal careless
ness of the mother in aBowiag-poison
in places to which all of the family haa
9CGCSS.
Last weeks woman took a paper of
potash for sugar from a closet, sal pas
it into the cups of coffee for her faauly.
They all drank enough of the eolee to
be made serioasry fll . "Mistakes
in the best-rerulated temilint." 1
excuse can be ofteredLfor the
ness that allows poisons a nlsees
tsey are, of easy arrant Give thesa a
special place nader .look sad key.
is the eldest eel-
lege
wss
ss this ccsntrv.
1825 at Uaisa CaV
lege.
, N. Y. 2rsy
HONEST MEN.
it
Trifle.
Old Abraham Dillinger sued Bill
Hillisrd for calling him s liar. He
thought that his character had been
aamsged to the extent of fifteen dol
lsrs, sad, for that amount, brought
suit before a justice of the peace. Jast
before court met, Hillisrd spproaehed
Dillinger and said:
' "Look here, Abe, you know your
character ain't been hurt fifteen dollars
wata."
"Yas, blamed ef it hain't."
"Now. Abe, I b'lieve that five dol
lsrs will kiver up sll damages, fur,
Abe, you know well enough that you
air a liar."
"Yes, I know sll that, BilL but 'it's
one o them sorter truths that I de
spise." ,
"I don't want no lawyer er peckin'
at me, Abe. Tell you what I'll do. I'll
give you five dollars."
"Taint enough, BilL"
"Wall, now, I want to do whut's
right We are both hoaest men an'
rood citizens. I'll give you the fifteen
dollars if you'll go before court, ssy
that you-was s liar an' withdraw the
suit
"Give me twenty, BiUie, an' blamed
ef I don't do it."
Tm your man."
The money was paid, and after the
court had been called to order, Abra
ham stated that as he "mout" have told
s lie, he would withdraw the suit.
"WelL" said he, after making the ac
knowledgment, "b'lieve I'll be goin',
as it's gettin' 'long toward the shank
o the evenin'. Goin' out my way,
Bill?"
"Not right now, Abe. Ssy, hold on
s minute. Jedge, I want this man tuck
up for false arrest. He has acknowl
edged that he is s liar."
"Let me see you s minute. Bill,"
called Abe.
Bill went out and Abe said:
"Look here, what's the matter with
you?"
"No thin', only I'm going to have the
damps put on you."
"I'll give you ten dollars to wipe this
thinr out"
"Now, Abe, I want to be Tar an
squar'. Gimme thirty dollars an' out
she goes. I ken send you to the Den
for mis, Abe, an' I consider thirty dol
lars mighty cheap."
"I'll give you twenty-five."
"Thirty, Abe."
"You must be a fool!"
"All right, Abe."
"Say!"
"WelL"
"Here's your money. I'm gettin
tired o' this blamed law business, fur
thar ain't no honesty in it Settle her
up an' let's be travelin'. I wouldn't
be a lawver
fur nuthin'." Arkansaxo
Traveler.
THEIR HUSBANDS' MERITS.
A Bttl SetWMi Nw York Amuou
Aristae Oat of m Dicawlon of the Good
rtata of TS(r KwpecUve Spouse.
Having a tuft of hair like an Indian
with a scalp, Mrs. Wolfenstein majes
tically strode into the Essex Market
Police Court There was a bald spot
on the top of her head, from which she-
said the waving lock had been up
rooted. Mrs. Mulligan had lived on
the opposite side of the hallway in
Mrs. Wolfenstein's tenement, and a
dispute had arisen over the compara
tive merits of their husbands. An of
ficer had been attracted to the scene
of battle by an unearthly clatter that
sounded like the wreck of a crockery
shop in an earthquake.
"What did Mrs. Mulligan do to
you?" asked Justice Gorman of Mrs.
Wolfenstein.
"Shudge, I'm a goot Cherman voo
man and I nefer do notings to nopody.
Dieserlrishervas foreffer annoying me,
and shust as I vas going to kirche
dieser morchen' she called me names
and said my man vas no goot"
"What did she call you?" asked the
Court, holding the -cross-bound Bible
in his hand.
"Sheeny, sheeny."
"Faix an' phwat did she call me fust
Yer Anner? It was Mickev. Mickev."
shouted Mrs. Mulligan. " "Thin she
said me husband waz no good or he'd
be a dinnermiter."
The hair' was compared to that
around the desert spot but no com
parison could be found." The officer
said he found the women's husbands
in their respective rooms tumbling cans
and dishes on the floor and screaming.
"Let me get oud to hellup my frau!
Let me go!" and "Hould on, Biddy;
I'll be ter yer aid if I can get away
from this spalpeen that's holdin' me."
The officer could not find anybody who
had been holding the experienced hus
bands. "One of you women must move,'
said the Justice. "That's the penalty
of the Court" X. T. Herald.
BANK OF ENGLAND NOTES.
DUBmac la Um Srystom r Kcdcasp-
ttaa laKagUad mad Tate Coaatry..
There is as great a difference between
the systems of issuing and redeeming
the notes of the Bank of England and
4be banks of the United States,' as there
is in the appearance of the notes them
selves. The English note is much longer and
somewhat broader than ours, is of
rough, white paper, with ragged edges,
and is printed on one side only, with a
few words and with no pictures or de
signs; while ours are completely cov-
"ered oaboth sides with vignette, a copy-
ox a pminnng, ana iawe won.
Our aotes are issued again and again,
until they become so worn and ragged
ss to be no longer serviceable. A
Bank of England note is never issued
more than once. Every note that comes
ia is at once canceled, and then it
is stored sway with other can
celed notes to be preserved five years,
when it k destroyed by burning. It
takes oae hundred and twenty clerks
te keep the record of notes issued and
said; .and so accurately is this work
done that the date when,anv note was
.Issued, the person receiving it. the time
whenit was paid in tbthe bank andby
wouiu, vmi'Bc ascenamea irom tne
books. If the time was within five
years, the note itself can be produced.
Many are the stories of attempts to
.counterfeit these notes, which have
always been failures. As the average
time between the issue and payment of
notes is oaly five or six days, the fact
that a counterfeit is in circulation is
known almost st once; and the system
ef English bankers aid merchants of
keeping the numbers ef notes received
and paid gives the elew by which has
feeder -quickly banted down.
Tfaufi'i fafnarnifna
FIRST
National Bank!
Altkerixeu Capital, - - $250,000
Pain Ii Capitol, - 50,000
Surplus an Prtits, - - 6,000
omenta ahd directors.
A. ANDERSON, Frtsft.
SAM'L C. SMITH, Vice Pres't.
O.T.EOEX, Cashier.
J. W. JSABLY.
HERMAN OEHLRICH.
W. A. MCALLISTER,
O.ANDERSON,
P.ANDERSON.
Foreign and Inland Exchange, Passage
Tickets, ana Seal Estate Loans.
2-vol-13-ly
ITJSTjriSS CAJLDS.
D. T. MUCTTK, M. D. F. J. SCHUG, M. D.
Dn. XULTTsT SCHUG,
U. S. ExaniMng Surgeons,
Local Surjjeoni. Union Pacific, O., N.
A B. H. and B. A M. R. R'a.
Consultations in German aad" English.
Telephones at office and residences.
sarOffice over First National Bank.
COLUMBUS,
NEBRASKA.
42-T
p D. EYAH8, 91. D
PHYSICIAN AXD 8UBGE0N.
3-Office and rooms. Gluck building,
11th street. Telephone communication.
44-ly
r J GARLOW, Collection Att'y.
SPECIALTY MADE OF BAD PAPER.
Office with J. G. HIggins. 34-3m
f"IJLA. AJNHB AUJO, a. s. S.
DENIAL PAELOB,
On corner of Eleventh and North streets,
over Ernst's hardware store.
NOTARY PUBLIC.
Sta StrMt, t in wt f Hsauaoad How,
Columbus, Neb. 91'7
J O. MEEDEaT,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
Office on Olive St., Columbus, Nebraska
2-tf
V. A. MACKEN,
DJCAUCKEC
Foreign and Domestic Liquors and
Cigars.
llth street, Columbus, Neb. 50-y
-ITcALElSTEBl BatOS.,
A TTQRNEYS AT LAW,
Office up-stairs in McAllister's build
ing, llth St. W. A. McAllister, Notary
Public.
-rOHJf TDIOTHT,
H0TARY PUBLIC AMD CONVEYANCER.
Keeps a full line of stationery and school
supplies, and all kinds of legal forms.
Insures against fire, lightning, cyclone
and tornadoes. Office in Powell's Block,
Platte Centei. I9-1
J. M. MACFABLA2TD, H. R. COWDKRY,
A&tntj sal sirT raST c. CeUsetw.
LAW AND COLLECTION OFFICE
OF
MACFAKXiAlTD & COWDBRY,
Celumbi. : : : Nebraska.
F. f. m TOW Est, 91. !.
(Successor to Dr. C.G. A.Hullhorst)
HOMEOPATHIC PHYSICIAN AND
SURGEON.
Regular graduate of two medical col
leges! Office up stairs in brick building
north of State Bank. 2-l.y
J. J. MAUGHAI,
Justice, County Surveyor, Notary,
Land and Collection Agent.
tarParties desiring surveying done can
notify me by mail at Platte Centre, Neb.
51-6m
Tp O.atUSCIXE,
"llth St., opposite LindeH Hotel.
Sells Harness, Saddles, Collars, Whips,
Blankets, Curry Combs,, Brushes, trunks,
valises, buggy tops, cushions, carriage
trimmings, Ac at the lowest possible
prices. Repairs promptly attended to.
TAMEM SAJLMOn,
CONTRACTOR AND BUILDER.
Plans and estimates supplied for either
frame or brick buildings. Good work
guaranteed. Shop .on 13th Street, near
St. Paul Lumber Yard, Columbus, Ne
braska. 526mo.
T M. LAvTEtE,
DEPUTY CO. SURVEYOR.
Will. do general surveying, in Platte
and adjoining counties. Office with S. C.
Smith.
COLUMBUS,
XJ3RLSKA.
17-tf
J 8. MTJRDOCK & SON,
Carpenters snd Contractors.
Have sad an extended experience, and
will guarantee satisfaction in work.
All kiads of repairing done on short
sotiee. Our motto is, Good work and
fairpriees. Call and give us an oppor
tunity to estimate for you. 3TShop on
13th St, oae door west of Friedhof A
Co's. store, Columbus. Nebr. 483-v
o. c. sTTAisnsroisr,
xairurACTURKn or
Tin and Sheet-Iron Ware !
Jeb-Wsrk, lsoing sad Gutter-
inf . specialty.
t3"Shes on Olive Street 2 doors
aerth of Urodfeubrer's Jewelry Store.
46-y
QW.
LAND AND INSURANCE AGENT,
HUMPHREY, NEBR.
His lands comprise some fine tracts
Ib tie Shell Creek Valley, and the north
ern portion of Platte county. Taxes
said for non-resldeats. Satisfactioa
guaranteed. 30 y
AURAL TESTS.
its Character Iadieata by taa
of His
A reporter has found s man who
claims that ears are the best index of
character. He has a Isrge collection
of cars to illustrate his views. "Now,"
he says, "just see how the lobe of that
ear goes down into the cheek; in front
there is no lobe to the ear at alL I
don't ssy, mark you, that every one
who has an ear of that formation is s
thief, but I do ssy he has the propensi
ties of onp, and only needs opportunity
or temptation to develop them. You
know Becky Sharp said that she could
not have been, an honest woman on
five thousand dollars a year, and there
are hundreds of people who are only
not dishonest because they are so fortu
nately situated financially as to be be
yond the reach of temptation. In some
very marked cases, such as in that of
the former owner of this- ear, which is
remarkably typical in formation, even
the possession of wealth does not pre
vent from stealing or cheating. This
ear, in its principal . characteristic is
almost the counterpart of a pair that
are worn by s man of former high
standing in the business world, but who
is now serving a term in the peniten
tiary. I used to have occasion to meet
this man in business, and was surprised
for years to see him retain the confi
dence of his employers; indeed his ap
parent trustworthiness almost caused
me to doubt the value of my theory.
At least I had come to regard him as
an exception to the rule, but the event
proved my views to be correct He was
detected in an enormous system of theft
that had been going on for years. It is
only s week or two ago I had occasion
to let a contract for building an exten
sive well, and among the bidders was
one who offered to do the work half s
dollar a thousand lower than any one
else. But when I saw the man his ears
told me not to trust him. I know he
would have robbed me in some way
had he got the contract"
"The establishment of such a theory
would raise the price of ear-muffs con
siderably." "Yes, or create a demand for false
ears; they make very natural-looking
ones out of glass now. But see, here's
another typical ear."
"You see this thin cartilage, with the
roll disappearing in the northeast cor
ner, and the ear itself coming almost to
a point somewhat like a fox's. That is
the ear of a keen, unscrupulous, hard
hearted money-lender, one of those
chaps who seem to take a positive de
light in oppressing the unfortunate and
in wringing from them- extortionate in
terest for small accommodations. Some
of these ears set well back, like a fox's
when it is snarling; they are the worst
cases. In others the upper point stands
slightly forward; such men are rather
shrewd and cunning than cruel, but
they are not very pleasant folks at the
best Other of this sort, again, are
movable at the will of the owners.
These chaps add to their other amiable
qualities a quarrelsome disposition that
will make them snap and snarl at
everything and everybody."
"But about the study of ears, which
is the best way to acquire this knowl
edge?" "The only way is to select a few note
worthv specimens. Study the eara of
some men whoe character you are well
acquainted with and mark their re
spective peculiarities. Then compare
those men of similar characteristics,
and see where their strongest resem
blances are; the first discovery of a
principle for yourself is the only diffi
culty. It is like the St Deni3 miracle,
only the first step that has to be ac
counted for, all the rest is easy."
Are ladies' ears susceptible of
similar interpretation?"
' 'Certainly. If any one is about to
get married'l could tell him whether
the woman he is about to wed is likely
to agree with him or not I could save
many a divorce, or worse, if the people
wanted me. But of course I couldn't
have time to do that work, though I
have serv ed some of my friends in that
way. Oh, you may set it down for a
fact that the ear is the true index of
character." St. Louis Globe-DemocraL
SCIENTIFIC IGNORANCE.
Th Idea of XataraJUU Begardlnr the
Domestic Cst Shown to B an Entirely
Krroneotu One.
Naturalists of course know more or
less about animals, but they are some
times strangely ignorant as to the most
simple and easy beasts. Take, for ex
ample, the monkey. There is nothing
complex or difficult about the monkey,
yet not a sitigle writer on zoology seems
to know that the monkey understand
the difference between current coiiO
snd buttons, and that a button that
might with perfect ease be put on a
Sunday-morning collection plats would
be rejected with scorn were an at
tempt made to palm it upon a monkey
connected with the hand-organ pro
fession.
The ignorance of naturalists is, how
ever, most conspicuously shown when
they attempt to describe the cat They
learnedly inform us that the cat belongs
to the species Felis domestiea; that it is
a carnivorous mammalian quadruped,
capable of domestication, and with a
passion for mice. This sounds well,
but is very far from being an exhaust
ive description of the cat Indeed, it is
characterized by other errors than those
of omission, and is in every way unsat
isfactory. The cat above, everything else, is s
crockery-smashing animal its alleged
passion for mice, which, by the way,
is never manifested except when the cat
is on the verge of starvation, is not to
be named on the same day with its
passion for breaking crockery, and tho
skill and perseverence which it shows
in gratifying this passion are simply
wonderful.
A gentleman whom we may call Mr.
A., and who is not a habitual natural
ist has made a careful study of his pri
vate cat in her relations to his crock
ery. The cat inquestion belongs to
the black and white variety, and is in
no respect remarkable in comparison
with other cats of her species. Within
the last two years this cat has broken
seventy-five pieces of crockery, includ
ing both glass and china ware, and
ranging from small wine-glasses up to
.soup tureens. . The smaller articles she
breaks in the presence of the cook,
while large platters and soup tureens
she usually breaks at midnight and
alone, one i especially fond of gob
lets, and if the cook, so much as looks
away from the table where the goblets
(arc standing ready to be washed, the
cat will leap up and dash two or three of
jthem to the floor. A soup tureen weigh
jing fifteen pounds may be placed oa the
i top shelf of a pantry, 'and the door may
;be carefully closed, but sooner or later
ithe oat will get up in the middle of the
night open tae pantry door, snd takiag
the tureen in ner lore-psws, nun it
against the wall, sad irretrievably
smash it
Mr. A. hss not, it hi true,- personally
observed his cat in the set of breaking
crockery. Indeed, that deceitful ani
mal pretends in his presence the most
utter indifference thereto. He has,
however, the explicit testimony of his
cook as to crockery ravages committed
by the cat snd as the cook is s most
respectable woman from Ireland, who
is zealous in protecting her employer
from imposition on the part of tramps,
he hss ontirs confidence in her asser
tion. The evidence brought forward
by this able observer touching the cat's
fondness for destroying crockery can
be corroborated by almost every house
keeper who has a faithful snd honest
cook, yet not a single naturalist defines
the cat as s crockery-destroying sai
maL Then, again, the naturalists assure us
that the cat is carnivorous. This ia true
as far ss it goes, but it is only a part of
the truth. The cat is also cakeivorous aad
preserveivorous, and evenpi&lelvoroua.
Another private student of cats, whom
we may call Mrs. B., hss s est whose
fondness . for preserves snd whose
capacity for devouring them are some
thing wonderful. This est makes noth
ing of breakings quart jar of straw
berry sweetmeats and devouring its en
tire contents in the course of an even
ing. The animal has even been known
to consume at the same time, and in ad
dition to the quart of sweetmeats, s
large quantity of cake, a pint of cream,
a pint of pickles, snd half a loaf of
bread. It is a curious fact that the cat
is never guilty of these excesses when
in the presence of her mistress, bat the
cook has again and again caught her in
the act of finishing an unlawful ban
quet Another curious thing is that
whenever the cook has company the
cat is almost sure to be seized with s
hunger for preserves and pickles.
Whether the presence of the cook's
guests irritates the cat and prompts her
to the commission of crime, or whether
the cook's attention is bo taken up with
her visitors that she fails to watch over
her employer's interests, there is at
E resent no means of deciding. It should
e added that this particular cook is
greatly grieved at the misconduct of
the cat but being a kind-hearted
woman, she is unwilling that the poor
irresponsible beast should be punished
for gratifying rt3 natural appetite.
2ow, one would think that all nat
uralists pretending to be acquainted
with the manners and customs of cats
would know that the cat breaks erock
ery and eats all sorts of things. No one
pretends that there is anything abstruse
about the cat On the contrary, it is
one of the first animals mentioned in
zoological text-books, and tho student
who hnds cats difficult would have very
little reason- to expect to master ele
phants, giraffes and other higher ani
mals, let naturalists are ignorant of
the most characteristic traits of cats,
and actually prefer to dwell, in describ
ing the cat upon some such partial
truth as that tho cat is" carnivorous, or
some such fallacy as that it has a passion
for nrce. Let the naturalists go to the
kitchen and humbly sit at the feet of
the cook. Thus they will learn in' fif
teen minutes more about the cat than
they can otherwise learn in s lifetime.
Harpers Bazar.
m
FABLES.
Some Distinctively Asaarieaa Ayelagao
With Striking XoraU.
A Fox one day met s Peasant and
Remarked that he took great Pleasure
in Informing.him that he had Decided
to Reform his Conduct
"Well, I am Heartily Glad of it" re
plied the Peasant "and I will do all
that I can to Strengthen your good
Resolutions."
Ne it day as the Fox Approached the
Peasant's Cottage the man came out
and Clubbed him oft.
"Is this the way you Strengthen my
good Resolutions! ' exclaimed Key
nard. in a voice of Pathos.
jJ"The less you see of my Chickens the
more apt you will be to stick to your
good Intentions," replied the Peasant
as he heaved another Club.
MORAL:
Don't leave your Watch and a Re
formed Burglar Hanging on the same
NaiL
THK PARROT AND THE MONKEY.
A Parrot and a Monkey one day be
gan a Dispute as to which of them had
the better right to be called Handsome.
"I have Limpid black Eyes!" ex
claimed the Monkey.
"And I have Plumage like the Rain
bow!" replied the Parrot
"I am the better Climber!"
"And I can Fly!"
The Dispute waxed so hot that it was
finaliy Agreed to leave the Question to
a Sage living near by.
"Ladies and Gentlemen," he re
marked, when the case had been stated,
"the Rose and the Violet are Sweet to
look upon, but when you want some
thing Real Solid take a cabbsge-head."
MORAL:
If yon pick a Wife for her dimples
don't Bewail the fact that she can't
make Bread.
THE ELEPHANT AXD THE HARE.
A Hare who was Running for Life to
Escape an Enemy happened to pass an
Elephant
"Hei ho!" called the great Beast,
"but here is my chance to do my Little
Friend a great" Favor without costing
me a cent"
Thereupon he seized her with his
Trunk as she passed and swung her
into the branches of the tree overhead.
"Alas!" cried the Hare a moment
after, "you have rescued me from the
Wolf to give me over to the Serpent! I
might possibly hae outrun the Wolf,
but here I have no show against my
Enemy!"
MORAL:
Never throw a man down stairs to
prevent his falling down a hatchway.
Detroit Free Press.
Enough Farmers.
It is quite probable that the present
low prices of all kinds of farm prod
ucts may have a quieting effect upon
our city philanthropists who have for
many years advised every poor man
with a family to go into the cauntry
and become a farmer. The young man
who went West ten or twenty years ago
and bought a farm probably sees as lit
tle money for his labor as tho&e who re
mained near their old hornet and
worked in some shop or even upou the
farm. There are o.-rtaluly enough
farmers at present and the more com
petition the worse it will be for those who
own farms and can not dispose of thm
without serious loss. Other iaduatricfl
must take th surplus laborers, or agri
culture will suffer more in the fcture
than in the past or present N. Y. So.
PITH AND POINT.
The man who always finds some
thing good in the newspaper hi the
chap who carries his lunch wrapped uo
in it
There were 241 decrees of divores
issued in Philadelphia courts ia 1864.
That is ringing tho liberty bell lead sad
long. N. t. Picayune
What is economy?" asks the
Philadelphia North American. We'll
tell youv It is paying tea cents for a
cigar and compelling your wife to turn
her last season's dress to mskeit do
for another winter. The country is
fairly bulging-with such economy. N.
Y. Ledger.
Mistress Jane, I read in the news
pspers that very much of thseaady
now made Is decidedly bad for the
health. You must be very careful that
dear little Fido does not get hold of say
of tie children's candy. PkiUdtlfkim
Progress.
It does seem to be s little bit es
travagaat to put s three-hundred rial
1st seahikin sacque upon s three-dollar
. woman, but it is sometimes excusable
when it is the only way ot smothering
three thousand dollars worth of ill
temper. Fail River Advance.
A woman in town became ao in
terested in a poetical calendar for the
new year that she has torn off sll the
leaves to read the sentiments ex
pressed thereon. That of December
31, -1S85, hss the proverb, quite appro
priate in her case: "Haste makes
waste." Boston Journal,
Yes. mv son. it is a solemn, eternal
fact that "Truth once erushed to earth
will rise again." And in these days of
awful carelessness truth is kept- so
busily engaged in performing the grand
rising act that she looks like s man
picking up pms. Burdette.
"What are you taking my boots
out of here for?'1 asked a gentleman of
his negro servant "Whut; is dese yer
boots, boss?" "You know they are.
you trilling rascaL" "Wall. I 'dare
for goodness, boss!" (Dropping the
boot&.) "I thought da wuz de skut
tles, an' 1 thought dat I'd go down
arter some coal, sah; Cuis how er
man can be'eeived." Arkansaw 3roe
eler. "Sir, can you give a poor man s
quarter?" "Why are you asking for
alms, my man? "I nave just come
from Spain, sir; I am an earthquake
sufierer." "But you are not a Span
iard; you sneak good English." "Oh,
as to that I speak Spanish, butsince the
earthquakes my Spanish is .so broken
that I am ashamed to converse in it"
Louisville Couriir-JourmtL
"I'm aware that the commentators
do not agree with me." said Rev. Dr.
Foosterer. in his sermon. Next day.
old Farmer Turniptops drove up to the
rectory with half a cartload of old pink
eye potatoes. "Mornin. parson, said
he. "Ye told us yistd'y that the com
mon taturs didn't agree wid ye; so I
brought ye s trifle o' tho finest pink
eyes ever ye laid yer own on. Balls o'
flour that's what they are!" A". Y.
Independent.
GREELEY'S BELL-BOY.
How tha Tooar Man Kt th Baav
tha Kdltor Sanctum.
Ben Van Houten, Greeley's old bell
boy, is driving a milk-wagon in New
Jersey. He was six feet high when in
the Tribune service, and he had eyes
like zo?;les and a hand like the hand
r rO
of Providence.
"Bub," said Horace to him. as he en
tered Ins sanctum one night "I want
to write for an hour or two, and I don't
want to be bothered. Keep sll the
bums out of my room."
"Yes, Mr. Greeley." Beu replied in a
hoarse vo.ee, for he had a voice lika a.
bull of Bashan.
Within half an hour B.m Bruce,
Dennis McLaughlin ami several other
political gad-fl'ej tried to buzz their
way to the old man's room, but were
summarilv x4iuelehed bv Ben. Finally,
Senator Henry Wilson, of Massachu
setts, entered, lie had been on a cam-
S
aign tour in Indiana, and he wore the
irticst duster and ilotioli hat that had
been seen in New York since tho de
parture of the IVudleton escort in 1868.
The Senator dtojipod h. corpet-ba and
advanced toward the open door of Mr
Greelcy's sanctum, when he was con
fronted by Bvn.
"Where aro you jroiag?" blurted th
watch-dog.
"I'm going to sea Mr. Greeley." th
Senator replied.
"Not much you hain't" roared Ben.
elevating his voice so as to make him.
self solid with Horace. "Git right out
o' here or I'll help you out"
General Wilson "was dumbfounded.
His face, usually red, was made redder
by Ben's manner.
"Won't you be so kind as to take my
name in toMr. Greeley?" he asked.
Ben looked hard at him. and asked
his name.
"WiIon." was the reply.
"Well." said Ben. 4TM go in snd
see if he wants to ee you."
He returned in forty seconds, more
agitated than ever.
It's just as I told you," he roared.
"He won't see vou; now, blame you.
get out o' here.'
Wilson turned to Amos Cummings,
night editor, who lay back in his chair,
bursting with suppressed emotion.
"What's the matter. General?" he
asked.
Senator Wilson explained, while Ben
looked on in astonishment
"There must be ome mistake." the
night editor remarked, 'and I'll take
you in snd introduce you to Me,
Greeley."
They entered the great editor's sanc
tum together. Horace sat at his high
desk, his eyes clo-e to the manuscript
scratchingaway like a hen on a fresh
sand-heap.
"Mr. Greely," said Amos, "here's
Senator Wilson. You refused to see
him just now."
Thre was a moment of silence. Hor
ace scratched away without looking
up.
"WelL" he piped, in a hrill alto,
without removing his pen. "the boy
said that a cursed old bum named W'i
son wanted to see me, and I thought it
was Billy Wilson." -Journalist.
Why should a community "get
ready for the cholera." any mare than
for smal!-pox, diphtheria, typhoid or
?elIow fever, on any other contagion?
'he true policy would seem to be to
to get ready not to have the cholera.
Boston Herald.
Captain R. L- Chndwick has bees
Postmaster at South Lyme, Conn., for
forty-six years, and for thirty years
carried the mail to the railroad statbon
himself.
A little) girl at Wind Gap. Pa, hss
ears that are beat forward and grown
fast to the face. She is bright snd her
hearing is very scute. PMsburk FmL.
n