tATES OF ADTEKTMinC
ifttn&nts
mtm
lSTBusineas and professional cards
of five lines or less, per annum, five
dollars.
22? For time advertisements, apply
at this office. 4
ISTLegal advertisements at statute
rates.
22TFor transient advertising, see
rates on third page.
E5TA11 advertisements payable
monthly.
ISSCKD BVERY VKI)NCMAV,
M. K. TriiXEK sS: CO.
Proprietors and Publishers.
T33 OFFICE. Eleventh .St., up stairs
tit Journal Uuildituj.
t i: i: m j? :
I'ervear
Six month JJ
Throe months
Single copies
VOL. XV.-NO. 16.
COLUMBUS, NEB., WEDNESDAY. AUGUST 18. 1884.
WHOLE NO. 744.
THE JOURNAL.
iu
L-i
I?
IFS
j
BTJ3INESS CAEDS.
1.T. JI.uityx. M. 1- 1. '- chio. M. I.
Drs. KARTYN & SCHUG,
U. S. Examining Surgeons,
l.or-il r-urgeeii. l'iii 1.n-iii-. .. N.
.V R. II. and I. R- :-
iii.ii!t-itiii 111 inTiH n ni'l r.azli-li.
Telephones at iillin- and rcsidem -.
noT.TTTvmiJS. - NEBRASKA.
t:!-v
rnrsiciAXA- .sn:ci:ox.
irr mi' :"i '' "" '"'k'1 "'' iwt-,1'tt'-
.).
t "iV 3 B-" "-. 35- ""
i . ( 'I AX f" ' ' '!'' - W-v-
!)i-.-.t- - I v. .m ii :in 1 children :i spe
cialty. i.imi: j.l.v-ifi in. iMhVe foruiei -
I mcllpic.l l' li-. RolHstecl. Telephone
c li.in-.re. '"'
O
B.I. A A."IIBCAI,4i;it .S.
y;. ia i. v a u lot,.
Oil roim-r t l-: '. fiilli :ml N.l Hi tl el.
i,it Kin-"!"-. hardware store.
0
ioie:E.s5: a sm-mv ":v.
.J TTOHX E YS-A 'J -LA T,
lip-stair in I. luck Ruilding, lltl treel,
AlmM- tin- New 1'ink.
II.
j. is;a?.
xotauy pun Lie.
Il'IIi Slrrt-t..! 4onrs Mist of llHnimoiid House,
CWmmAim. Xrh. 4fll-y
rpiiB;atsro.- .v iwi-:ks
I
SUIWEOX IIKXT1STS,
EjJ I MIHI" I" .win u" ", .........
v w, :.. SI. ...I.. Ml lln.l.' I'lillim.
bus. Nebraska. H-
J.
a. ii:z:ci:s:,
ATTOnXEY AT LA II',
Oiliec on Olive M.. Oduinhll. Nebraska.
2-1 f
V. A. MACKEN,
IIKAI.K1C IN
Ftirciijn ami Domestic Liquors and
Ciyars.
lltli -tr.ct. Odunibiis. X"b. "-'
M
cA B.B.BJ TEK ISICOS.,
A TT0R2TEYS A T LA W,
Office upstair- in "McAllister's build
ing 11th M. V. A. .McAllMer, Notary
I'ubli
ti.
J. M. MAITAKUNM, K- COWllKUY,
Ittcrse? ii U:t;r7 F-V.'c. C:'U:'.:r.
LAW AND I'OLLEITIOX OFFICE
OK
MACFARX.AND & COWDERS",
Volumes, Xebr'iska.
'. l- Kl'.'V.'VKK. .11. IK,
(Mjci-u-sor to lr. C.n. A.lliilllior-t)
HOMEOPATHIC PIIYS1CIAX AXD
H'JiUEOX.
Uvular L'lMiluati' of two in.-diral rol-l'-i-s.
Oili.r Olif St.. ont'-hair Mock
noTlli f Il.iiniiioiiil Utilise. --ly
.S.".I. .IIAUWHA,
.first ice. County Surreior, Xolitn,
Lutitl ami 'Collection Aycnl.
JTart ic- ilrsirin;; -urvov iiiiT ilom- -:i!i
m.lilj tut- 1 in ill at 1'l.itti- iVntrv, N-l.
."il-(iiit
V.
BB.3C5 "S'BI1-:,
llth St., opposite Lindcll Hotel.
S.'IN Il:ii-urs. Sadillos, Collar-, Whips.
Klanki-t-. i.rr C"oinl. Ilrtis-lii-s. trur-Ks,
alis-s. I.ii-j.m "top. ciisiioiis. t.iriiai'
triiiiiiuiiv's. A at the love-t pos-ilil.-pri.es.
l: p.itis pr uiptly attenilcti to.
$fk fi ' Wii'l. at home. ?...! M oiltlit
YW tree. l.iv ali.liitelv s-iro. No
JJ risk. Capital ti"t r-.pureil.
Keailr, it yon want business
at V.hieli persiiis i" either c. ouni; or
will, ean make irreat pa all the time they
work, witli alis. .Int.- eertainty. writ.- for
partieiilars to II. llAt.Lrrr .t CO., Port
land, Maine.
GEOKGE SPOONER,
coxti:ajoi: foi: all eixd.s of
mafox yoi:k.
(Iitick, Thirteenth St., hot ween )lie
:nd Nebraska Axenite. Kt'sidt'iice on the
eorner of Kihtli and llie.
All "Worlc fJinu-aiileed.
ls-tf
JS. MUUDOCK & SON,
Carpenters and Contractors.
Haveh.id an extended evperlenee, and
will nuarantoe satisfaetion in work.
All kinds of repairing ilone on short
notice. Our motto i. (iood work and
fair prices. Call and mve Us an oppor
limit toc-tiinalt-foryou. 3Tbop on
l.ith St.. one door west of Fricdhof .V
;oV.torc. Columbus. Nebr. 4S1-V
o. c. SHLiVisrjsrojsr,
MAMFAcrn:n: ok
Tin and Sheet-Iron Ware !
Job-Work, Roofing and Gutter
ing a Specialty.
JSThop on KU-MUtu Street, opposite
lleintz'.s lru:r Store. 40-y
G
XV. CliAKK,
LAXD AXI) IXSIL'AXCE AC EXT,
IIUAirHEEY, XEIilt. -
His lands comprise Mime line tracts
in the Shell Creek Valley, and the north
ern portion ot Pl.'tte county. Taxes
paid for non-residents. Satisfaction
guaranteed. iO y
f-OCUMBUJ PAt'kLliG CO
COLUMBUS, - NEB.,
Packers and Dealers in all kinds of Hog
product, cash paid for Live or Dead Hog
or grease.
Directors. R. II Ilcnry, Prest.; John
Wiggins, Sec. and Treas.; L. Gerrard, S.
Corv.
TA5IES SALnO.l,
CONTRACTOR AND BUILDER.
Plans and estimate? supplied for either
frame or brick buildings. Good work
guaranteed. Shop ou 13th Street, near
St. Paul Lumber Yard, Columbus, Ne
braska. 52 Cmo.
IOTICE TO XEACHKRS.
J. E. Moncrief, Co. Supt.,
Will be in his office at the Court House
on the third Saturday of each
month for the purpose of examining
applicants for teacher's certificates, and
for the transacttou of any other business
pertaining to schools. 5C7-y
COLUMBUS
STATE BANK!
COLUMBUS, NEB.
'AS II CAPITAL,
$75,000
IHJIKCTOKS:
I.kanim:): (Jki:j:ai:i, 1'rcs't.
Cu... V. I1UI.ST, Vice Pros' I.
.Itii.iirs A. Kkkd.
M. II. IIknuy.
J. IL Taskku, Cashier.
Ilmtlc of lf:-ll, Miscount
:nJ i:xclunp:e.
'oISt'fIn-i i'rontpllj- illatlo on
::i JoIiiIh.
fiy Intercut on 1'inie ieo--
lt. -
1). .1. liKKI'.KltT,
CoiMtr.
IKA It. IlltlGfil-K,
Is&AaX Catiic:
THE
CITIZENS" BANK !
lir.MPUKKV, XE1J.
ISTPrompt attention given to Col
lections. jSTPay Interest on time deposits.
reinsurance, Passage Tickets and
Real Estate Loans. "-tf
LINDSAY &TREKELL,
WIIOI.KSALE AND RETAIL
FLOUR Al FEED STORE!
OIL CAKE,
CHOPPED FEED,
Bran, Shorts,
BOLTED i HTED CORN MEAL,
GRAHAM FLOUR,
AND FOUR KINDS OF THE BEST
' WHEAT FLOUR ALWAYS
ON HAND.
TST.WX kinds of FRF ITS in their sea
son. Orders promptly tilled.
lltli StTeet, Colunilii, ISlr.
iT-'ini
HENRY G-ASS,
TJIST DEETiMCER !
rOFFLNS AND METALLIC CASES
AND DtALKK IX
Furniture. Chairs, Bedsteads. Bu
reaus. Tables, Safes. Lounges,
&c. Picture Frames and
Mouldings.
5l:cpairinu of all kinds of Upholstery
Goods.
0-tf COLU3I1WS, NER.
GOLD
fr the working class
Send Iiieents for postage,
and we will mail you free
a roval, aluablc box of
sample j'oods that will put ou in the way
of making more money in a lew days than
you ecr thought possiMe at any biisi.
.ess. (. apital not required. We will
start you. You can work all the time or
in spa're time only. The work is univer
sally adapted to both sexes, yotin and
old."" You ean easily earn from ."ill cents to
$." t'li-r; eenin'Z." That all wltn want
work may test the business, we make
this unparalleled offer; to all who are not
well satisfied we will send ?1 to pay for
the trouble of writing u. Full particu
lars, directions, etc.. sent lrcc. Fortunes
will be made by those who irive their
whole time to tile work. Great ueeess
absolutely sure. Drn't delay, start now.
Addres SrixsoN . Co., Portland, Maine.
a woiei of v.aki.k;.
ARMERS, stock raisers, and all other
F
interested parties will do well to
remember tint the " esterti Horse and
Cattle insurance Co." of Omaha is the
only company doing business in this state
that insures" Horses, Mules and Cattle
against loss by theft, accidents, diseases,
or injury, (as aUo against loss by lire and
Ii::litnin":r). All representations by agents
of other Companies to the contrary not
withstanding. HENRY GARN. Special Ag't.
l.Vy Columbus, Neb.
NO HUMBUG!
J3ut a G-rand Success.
RT. BRIGHAM'S AUTOMATIC WA-
ter Trough for stock. He refers to
every man who has it in use. Call on or
leave orders at George Yale's, opposite
Oehlrich's grocery. . IMJni
J. WAGNER,
Livery and Feed Stable.
Is prepared to furnish the nublic with
good teams, buggies and carriages for all
occasions, especially for funerals. Also
conducts a sale stable. 44
tLYON&HEALY
I State A Monroe Sts.. Chicago.
Will kb i prrraU to My iintt iWr
I tor 13. sW pi, J10 EarmTiLgi
AMD CATALOGUE. I
or icitranou. stuu, ssp. uia,
IPmse&L Enltt. CuLvnDk
i SuaJs. Dran Iews StuTk ud
I Hili, Soadrj Ittsd ucteu, JplxiDj
UMatnitb, ifco IsdadM Inuroctlon aa & Ex
Lwl, for Anuteor Buuli. iaJ OulecM'
(Ctkau4IUk
WHHSsSHQI":
I sSojm
FIRST
National Bank !
COLTJ1VIBXJS. NEB.
Authorized Cnpiial,
Paid In Capital,
Surplus aiid Profits, -
S2")0,000 ;
50,01)0 j
. (;,ooo
oitickus ani iin:r.CTOt:s.
A. ANDERSON, 1'rcs't.
SAM'L C. SMITH. Vice 1'rcs't.
O. T. ROEN. Citstier.
.1. W. EARLY.
HERMAN OEHLRH'lI.
W. A. MCALLISTER.
G.ANDERSON,
P. ANDERSON.
Foreign and Inland Eveh:in;e, Passage
Tickets, ami Real Rst.ite Loans.
2'J-vo!-i:i-l
COAL ' LIME!
J.lfi.UORTH&CO.,
DEALEPiS IN
Goal,
Lime,
Hair,
Cement.
Hork Spin? Coal,
Carbon (Wyomin?) Coal .
Eltlon (Iowa) Coal
.67.00 per Ion
.. ecu "
Blacksmith Coal of best quality al
ways on hand at low
est prices.
Nortli Side Eleventh St.,
COLUMBUS, NEB.
I4.:iin
UNION PACIFIC
LAND OFFICE.
Improved and Unimproved Farms,
Hay and Grazing Lands and City
Property for Sale Cheap
AT THE
Union Pacific Land Office,
On I .on y Time ami line rate
of Interest.
KITFiiial proof in.ide on Timber Claims,
llniiesteaiU and Pre-emptio'is.
jfTAll wishing t buy lands fny d.--seriptiou
will please call ami examine
III list of lallils hefore looking elseUlielc
JSjTAII having lands to si'-H will please
eall and give me a desei iption, I rm ,
prices, ('K-.
37"! a si, am prepaicil to iti-up" prop
el ty, as I bae the agency of several
lils"t-elas.s Fire iiislir.lli.-e eompatlies.
t. W. (TT, Sr.Jiiitor. .speaks Cenn.in.
WASBIIIKB '. S.?Si'fi'2l,
;Sl-tf Coliiinlois, Wbraskn.
BECKER & WEIiCH,
PROPRIETORS OF
SHELL CE1EK MILLS.
MANUFACTURERS AND WHOLE
SALE DEALERS IN
FLOUR AID MEAL,
OFFICE, COLU VI ' VKIt.
SPEICE & NTH,
Gcnor.il Agents for the Sale of
REAL ESTATE.
Union Pacific, and Midland Pacific
R. R. Lands for sale at from $3.00 to $10.00
per acre for easb, or on live or ten years
time, in annual payments to suit" pur
chasers. We have also a large and
choice lot of other lands, improved and
unimproved, for sale at low price and
on reasonable terms. Also busines and
residenco lots in the city. We keep a
complete abstractor titleto all real es
tate in Platte County.
021 COL-UJimLS, IVEB.
LOUIS SCHREIBEE,
II
All kinds of Repairing done on
Short Notice. Baggies, Wag
9 ons, etc., made to order,
and all work Guar
anteed. Also sell the world-famous Walter A.
Wood Kowers, Beapers, Combin
ed Machines, Harvesters,
and Self-binders the
best made.
iSrShop opposite the "Tattersall," on
Olive St., COLUMBUS. 26-m
MCMMWaMffiei'
PATIENCE.
HoM thou mine hand, beloved, as in sit
Within the radianco of our winter's flra.
Watching the dainty shadows as they Hit
On wall and ceiling, as the names loap
higher.
Hold thou mino hand, beloved, with the calm
Cliwe clasp of love assured and at rest.
And let the peace of home, a blessed balm.
Fall on us, foldintr breast to breast.
Hold thou mine band, beloved, while I spcafc
(! all thy ;iove bath done und borne for me.
The stronger soul supporting still tho weak,
Tie .'ood hand piviiitr royally and free;
Thetender heart that tut man's roughness by.
To wipe weak tears from eyes too seldom dry.
I touch ttii-s thinjr and that, thy pretty jrlfta.
The silver zone, the jeweled tlna-er-riiiff.
The outward symbols of u love that lifts
My fate and fne beyond life's biiffctiiijr.
Yet, oh. thrice irunerous fiver! there remains
A tiling for which I havo not thankod thee
et.
Thy patience through the long years with
their pains
Thy patience with my weakness and rejrrct.
Ah. let mo thank thee "now with falling tears.
Tears of great joy, and deep, serene, con
tent. And Go.l be thanked that through tho weary
years
Wo saw together ere our lives wcro Went,
Although the years were desolato and long;
Thy patience matched thy love, and both pero
strong. All the Year ltouiul.
EXERCISE.
Tho old Romans who conquered
eighty-six foreign nations had tccojj
iri.ed'lh secret of success when they
called their armies exercitus, bodies of
drilled or exercised men. Exercise
overcome all dillicullies, and if the
power of its inllueiicu has limits, thoy
have never been ascertained. It en
Mites every victory; practice, t. c, ex
orc'se and experience, would enable a
hundred veterans to beat a thousand
recruits, even if tho recruits were bet
ter armed. A brigade of ordinary rifle
men would have no chance against a
regiment of picked archers, such as
were employed in war in tho Middle
Ages.
During the Middle Ages it was the
custom of princes, and even of wealthy
burghers, to keep runners who followed
their carriages afoot while tho horses
were going at full gallop. Fast runners
were in great request, and if parents
wanted to qualify their children for a
position of that sort, they began to train
them from the earliest childhood.
From the city of Puebla, in Mexico,
n sandy country-road leads across the
hills to the valley of Amozoc. Early
in the morning that road is crowded
with Indian hucksters, who carry heavy
baskets on their backs. They often
come from a distance of ten or twelve
miles, but make the whole trip at a
fsharp trot, and without a single stop.
Their children trot at their sides, carry
ing small bundles or bags, and thus
learn their trade so gradually that they
hardly feel the hardships of it.
It isccrtainly queer that nowadays a
Bniail,"short-legged dog can easily out
run the tallest man. It has not been
always so. An ostrich proves that two
legs can go as fast as four. Want of
exercise probably accounts for the
whole difference. Next to football tho
.favorite game of the English school
boys is the play called "Hare and
Hounds." In watching their races I
noticed that for one boy who is too
short-legged to win, at least twelve are
too short-winded. Their lungs give out
a long while before their legs do. But
that sort of short-windedness can be
readily cured by various kinds of exer
cise, especially by mountain excursions.
Lifting weights is another excellent
lung execrcise. There is a story of a
(Grecian Samson, the athlete Milo of
C'rotona, who day after day carried a
calf around the arena, and gained in
strength as the calf gained in weight,
till he could finally carry a steer. We
may doubt if the steer was quite full
grown; but there is no doubt that Dr.
Winship, of Roslou, Mass., practised
with dumb-bells and bagfuls of pig-iron
till lie was able to lift (though only for
a moment) the weight of the heaviest
steer on the Texas prairie. It w:u
e ,ually eerta'n that before he began to
exercise lie was the puniest student of
the Medical College. And if a weakly
man of modern times could uplift such
a weight, why .should not a champion
of the Civ ian arena have been able to
carry it for a distance of half a mile?
For it can not be denied that people
have become more puny since they
began to trust to gunpowderaud steam
instead of to exerei v.
In countries where they still rely on
the strength of their limbs, -ls in
Tiirkc, Hungary and Afghanistan,
there are plenly of men earning their
bread by common labor who jould as
lotiish the so-called athletes of a
French circus. A Turkish porter will
shoulder a box which the driver of a
New York express-wagon would hesi
tate to unload without assistance. Dur
ing the Ia.st Afghan war the native
warriors carried cannon t a battery on
the toj of a hill from where the En
glish soldiers were tumble to carry
them down again.
The foot-soldiers of the Turkish Jani
zaries had to drill in full armor, run,
wrestle, and even swim, without re
moving their iron equipments. Such
a value did their drill-iu:istor set ;;pon
tlic i ii II n nco of early training that they
would never accept a recruit of more
than twelve years of age. These cadets
were exercised for years, like the sons
of the old Spartans, before they were
a-signed to actual duty, and the result
was that the .Janizaries repeatedly
beat the armies of all Western Europe
combined.
The ancient Greeks managed to tra'n
not only their troops, but the whole
Nation, by otlering liberal prizes for
proficiency in all kinds of,bodily ex
ercise, such as running, leaping!! lift
ing, spear-throwing and wrestling. At
a distance of sixty yards their spear
men could hit a target with unfailing
certainty. Their runners competed
with horses and grayhounds. It is on
record that the champion leaper of the
Spartan Helotes once cleared lifty-two
feet, and a native of Crolona in South
ern Italy even "lifty -live feet.
But .hc most wonderful results of
life-long training are ieen in the
achievements of the Oriental acrobats,
who come from countries where over
population obliges such people to work
miracles in order to excel their numer
ous competitors. During the last Vien
na exhibition a troop of Japanese jug
glers attracted far more attention than
the display of their native art works
and manufactures. They had amazing
ly clever rope dancers and tumblers,
mere boys some of them. But their
best performers were all gray-headed
old men. It had taken them a.life-timo
of practice to master the difficulties of
their special tricks. One of them be
gan his performance by putting the
palm of his left hand upon a box, and
after stretching out his legs horizon
tally in one direction, and his head
and right arm in the other, lie
raised himself in a way that his whole
weight was supported on the edge of
his left hand. Without ever touching
the ground with any other part of his
body, he then began to turn ou his
wrist, slowly at first, then more and
more quickly, till his outstretched feet
whirled around liko the spokes of a
horizontal fly-wheel. The rapidity of
Ms motions was wonderful enough, butj
how he contrived to keep his "balance
would have puzzled the best acrobats
of our gymnastic associations.
The next performer had an attendant
who held a tin box b' a leather strap,
and swung it slowly to and fro like the
pendulum of a large clock. In tho
center of the box was a hole about au
inch and a half, but certainly not more
than two inches, in diameter. Tho
juggler stepped back to a distance of
about twenty yards, and began to throw
little copper balls at the tin box. The
first ball was caught by the attendant,
who thereupon raised tho box a couplo
of inches, but continued to swing it to
and fro. Tho second, third and follow
ing balls went straight through the nar
row aperture without over touching tho
rim of the hold. He threw about 'fort'
of them, and then rctired.amidst the pro
longed applause of the whole audience,
for this time everybody could appreciate
tho miraculous cleverness of the trick.
But the champion of the band came
last. His whole outfit consisted of a
straight wooden pole, about teu feet
long, and hardly three inches in di
ameter. It was "cut oft" square at each
end, and did not seem to be very heavy.
This pole the juggler placed upright on
the level surface of a wooden board,
tried the Ixrard with his feet to see that
it did not shake, and then pro
ceeded to climb the pole. He clambcrod
up and down somo ten or twelve
times in quick succession. He then as
cended to the very top, seized it wilh
his hands, let go his feet, and went
spinning around in a circle, till it made
one giddy to look at him. Bv a sudden
contraction of his body, ho then joined
his feet at the lop of the pole, let go his
hands, and slowly raised himself till he
stood bolt-upright like a statue on a
pillar. All this while the pillar had no
other support but a Hat wooden board,
and was balanced entirely by the man
agement of the performer.
One of the spectators, an expert
American gymnast, got permission to
go on the stage, and examino that pole.
He looked at the lower end. took up
tho board, looked at tho floor below,
and then examined the board itself. It
was nothing but a flat piece of pine
wood.
" Well, how do you explain it?" I
asked him when ho came back.
"I can't believe in witchcraft," ha
uttered, "so I don't know at all what
to say about it." Felix L. Oswald, in
Youth's Companion.
Fixing a Screen Door.
Ho had a doubtful expression on his
phiz as ho entered a hardware store,
and he spoke about the stove trade, the
Wall street panic, the Greenback Con
vention and several other matters be
fore he finally said:
"I think it is time to put up fly-screen
doors."
"Certainly."
'You have springs, I suppose."
Yes, sir."
Have you a spring which I can ad
just?" We have. Here is one which a boy
ten years old can put on. The time for
intricate springs has passed and sim
plicity is the rule."
"Let's see. I wonder if I can put that
on?"
"Of course you can. All you want
are a screw-driver and three screws.
Here this end goes on the door that
end on the casing. See? When you
have it on take this wire and turn here.
When the spring has the right forco
drop those slots thus. See? Why, a
woman could put on one of those springs
with her eyes shut price fifteen cents."
Bones hadn't lost airy of his doubtful
expression as he started out. He walked
home feeling of his car and trying to
remember just what the dealer said.and
in half an hour ho was at work on the
door. The dealer had held the upper
end of the spring to the northwest,
while his door opened to the northeast.
He sat down and thought and thought,
and finally decided to try it, anyhow.
Mrs. Bones came out and helpc'd him
and the spring was finally put on.
Now what?" she asked, as she
opened the door and saw that it re
mained thus.
"Why, wo turn the ratchet, I sup
pose." "Racket what's that?"
'Hanged if I know. I've heard the
hoyssay: 'Cheese tho ratchet,' and that's
all I know about it. Oh yes; he said
I must put this wire in the holes ami
turn."
"Well, go ahead."
Bones turned and turned. The
spring .stiffened and the door flew open.
'That's just like you," she said as
she jumped back. "What on earth do
we want of a spring to hold a door
open?"
"That's so that's so. Let's take it
off and turn it end forend.
This was tried, but it was no good,
and Mrs. Bones cried out:
"You might have known it! It takes
a man with" brains to put on a spring!"
"And I've got more of 'cm right in
my heels than your relations have in
their heads!"
"Then put on that spring!"
"I'm going to when I get ready.
There's no partieulary hurry, as I can
sec.
"Maybe it's tired!" she sneered.
"And maybe you'd better attend to
your mopping!"
She went "in and Bones tried that
spring six different ways. Then he
went off and borrowed a gimlet, an
inch auger, a crowbar, a jack-screw
and a pair of pincers, and fie tried six
other ways. He turned the old tiling
until the tension lifted up one cud of
the house, aud he looked from the from
gate to the alley fence for .the ratchet,
but tho door had no spring to iL He
fiut the spring on diagonally, crosswise,
engthwise, top for bottom and bottom
for top, and about four o'clock in the
afternoon Mrs. Bones came out and
found him pounding it with a crowbar,
while the door had been wrenched
apart and heaved into the alley.
"I said you couldn't do it," she re
marked. "Couldn't do what?"
"Put on that spring."
"Who's tried to put on a spring?
We don't need any door thero, and I've
taken it away. It isn't at all likely that
we will see three flies this summer, but
if a few do come around we ain't going
to murder 'em. Spring! I was just
fooling you. That was a burglar alarm,
and the reason I didn't put it on is be
cause we haven't anything to bur
glarize. Even if we had I'd let 'em
come. A burglar can't live unless he
has a fair show." Detroit Free Press.
As soon as it was announced that
the lato Mr. John F. Slater had set
apart $1,000,000 for educating the freed
men of tho South. letters began pouring
in begging him to give money for this!
that and the other schomes of alleged
benovolence. and before he died he had
received biishels of such communications
from all parte f the world. lioston
PotL
A Diplomatist.
"The next time I catch you loafing
around this plantation. I'll shoot oft the
top ot" your iufernal head!" exclaimed
Colonel" Lawson. addressing a tall gen
tleman of cbou complexion. "Every
time you come aro'tnd here something
is missing."
The tall gentlcnv.rn, placing one foot
on a sump, and bringing his elbow to
rest on his knee, looked at the Colonel
for a moment and replied: "Ycr say
dat ehery time I comes heah suthen's
lnisscn?"
"Yes. I do."
Wall, dat's a mighty good sign dat
I doait tuko it, case of 1 did, it woulduif
be mis.sen' when I comes, but when I
goes or way."
"You know what I mean, you black
scoundrel!''
1 knows whut yer says."
"Yes. and you'll feel what I say if
you don't keep away from here. What
has become of the plow that was lean
ing up thero m tho corner of tho
fence?"
"Ain't de plow dar now, sah?"
"Don't you see that it is gone?"
"How ken 1 see a thing when it's
gone? 'Clare ter goodness c white
'gennermen is or get tin' so c it is I kan't
unerstan' 'em ha'f de time.'
"I'll make you understand me the
first tiling you know. What became of
the saddle that was hanging on the
banister?"
"Saddle gone, too, Colonel?"
"You know it i.s, von infernal thief!"
"Look heah. doan come erowdin me
dat way. I tries ter do de bes I ken,
an' I doan like ter hab my reppcrtatiou
dragged erroim in do dew pizen o' a
white man's spite. I ain't been 'tendii.'
dat night school tor be 'bused."
"Move ou and don't come skulking
around here any more.''
He took his loot from the stump,
turned and walked slowly to the fence,
then, throwing one arm over the top
rail, he looked back at the CVlonol and
said :
Dars a time er comin' when 3'er'll
take back all dis heah slander. I come
up heah tor day 'spectin' tor hab peace
wid yer. De niggers down on de Young
plan ation sont me up heah ter '.amine
yerezer'vailable cannurdate fur do Lcg
islatur', but I sees dat yer doan want de
per.ishnn."
"Look here,'' the Colonel replied,
"let's talk this matter over."
"No, I'se er'bleegod ter ycr. I'll go
on btck an' tell de fool niggers wttt' a
mistake da's made. Good day. sah,"
and he began to climb the fence.
"Hold on a minute. I thought you
could take a joke."
"Yer's ctt-ed me o' takin' ebcrything
else," sitting on the top rail of the
fence.
"Simon, you have been around hero
long enough to know me."
"Yas, putty well 'quaintcd, 'blecgcd
ter yer."
"Come on. old boy, and let us look
this matter over in a sensible way. The
colored people know that they have no
better friend than I am."
He got down and approached the
Colonel. They talked for some time,
and the smooth flow of conciliatory
w.irds of the Colonel wcro occasionally
interrupted by the pleased haw-haw of
the colored gentleman. When ever3
thing had been satisfactorily arranged,
old imon said.
"I'se niightly in need o' a little
money, sah. Dat udder cannurdate is
flingin his silver 'mong do niggers, an'
I wants a lectio ter sorter offset him.
'Rout ten dollars'll do. Thankee, sah."
as the Colonel gave him tho money:
"wish er good-dav. Mr. Kipersenta
tive." "
Shortly after the diplomatist wont
away, the Colonel discovered that a line
set of buggy harness was missing, and
that a game rooster, for which he had
paid quite a large sum, was also gone.
Testis Sifliiifjs.
Boston's (Jirl Fiddler?.
A stranger in Boston who happened
to be in the street when the girls an
going to or returning from school can
not fail to notice that many of the pu
pils carry violin cases. This is so com
mon a spectacle that no notice is taken
of it by the inhabitants. Not infro
quentlv a young woman balances her
violin case with a large box of painting
materials, and it is currently reported
that so fashionable havo painting and
violin playing become that more peo
ple carry the tools than are oven in the
.smallest wav acquainted with their use.
A well-know- ioliuist said. '-The fa- t
you havo notivd. that the girls hen1
have, in many instances, taken to ic
liu playing, has been of great benefit to
proiossioH.il fiddlers. A good violinist
can now liml hero all the teaching he
wants. The tat for violin playing
among lad'es began to be noticeable
here about five years ago, and now. it
has been calculated there are from four
bundled to live hundred young ladies
studying, beside many who havo be
come Miliicicntry advanced to pursue
their practice alone.
"The violin is an instrument partic
ularly well adapted for ladies. It does
not require any great physical strength,
and the proper h.lndlng of instrument
and bow admit of the display of the ut
most grace. Violin -playing does not
have a tendency to narrow the chest
and round the body as too constant sit
ting at the piano often docs. The violin
is portable, and, with a mute' on,
can be practiced in a school or bed
room without annoving the household.
(if course the difficulties of the instru
ment are great, but I find, as a rule, the
feminine ear is more acute and accurate
than the male. As the great difficulty
of the violin is to step the notes in tunc,
the value of a good ear is inestimable.
There are many young girls in Bo-ton
who are really excellent players, and in
several instances there are families
where the daughters can supply a com
plete quartette, viz., first and second
violins, viola and violoncello. The last
named instrument is less adapted to la
dies, because it should properly be held
by the grip of the lower limbs, bui the
placiug of a loig peg on which the in
strument rests has almost overcome the
difficulty.
"My pupils take the greatest possible
interest in their instruments. They read
up on the subject of violin-making, and
can talk learnedly with a professor
ubout scrolls, single and double purfling.
sound-posts, bars and varnishes. They
have the dates of the great makers firm
ly fixed in their minds, and will argue
warmly about the respective merits of
the Cremona artists.
" I don't know what started the
fashion in Boston, but probably the ad
vent of some' lady violinist or the read
ing about the great triumphs of Mine.
Norman-Ncruda in London. At any
rate, the fashion, though on the whole
steadily increasing, grows spasmodi
cally, and fhe recent playing of a con
certo by Mme. Sembrich at tho Abbey
benefit has brought me several new
'pupils.
" A girl should begia to leaca when
about ten years old, but not unless she
has a strong liking for music, a good
ear and decided perseverance. Tho
first .stages of learning are extremely
dreary, and nothing can mako them ou
tlurable but a strong ambition. Bad
violin plavfng is, I "think, the worst
torture I know, and I will not keep a
pupil who does not show application
and intelligence. I should think my
self tit for jail if I turned looso upoL'
society any large number of bad play
ers. It requires from two to throo
years of honest work before a pupil
can play a simple piece sufficiently well
to please even partial listeners. To be
a great violinist is, as Dogberry .says,
'the gift of nature. Some men of in
telligence, industry, and who devotcdly
love their instrument, will practico for
ten hours a day for half their, lives and
never bo more than good reliable
players. On the other hand, tho now
pre-eminent Joachim at thirteen played
tho Mendelssohn concerto in so superb
a U lo that the composer publicly em
braced him." Boston Transcript.
Oyster Fishing.
As to the methods by which oysters'
are taken it is hardly necessary to men
tion the familiar ones of the tongs and
tho dredge. The latter i.s the usual
method, the dredge resembling a largu
iron claw, whose downward-bent tcelh
scrape the bottom of the sea or bay. To
the claw is attached an irou-meshed bag
largo enough to hold two or three bush
els. This instrument is draggeu over
the otcr bed by the forco of vessel
moving at easy sail, the clusters of
oysters being torn loose from their
clinging places by the claw and depos
ited in the bag.
There are other le3s known methods
of raking oysters. At the island of Mi
norca, in the Mediterranean, they aru
dived for in the same method as pearl
oysters are obtained. The diver de
scends to a depth often of a dozen fath
oms, hammer in hand, and knocks
loose with his right :is many oysters as
he can clasp iu his left hand, with
which he quickly rises to the surface.
Thus two divers are kept going uutil
their boat is filled.
An easier method is that pursued on
tropical shores, where the oysters at
tach themselves profusely to the roots
of the mangrove and other water-loving
trees. These oysters are larger and
tiuer than those on the bottom; and to
obtain a plentiful-meal it is only neces
sary to cut off a root with the blow of
a hatchet, fling it over tho shoulder,
with the oysters clinging to it like
grapes to their stem, and walk home
shouldering a bushel of the juicy bi
valves. The negroes of San Domingo
have the habit ot serving the osters ou
their tables still attached to the roots,
like grapes of the sea.
A singular method of oyster" fishing
is that practiced by the raccoon. This
shrewd animal takes his stroll along the
shore at low tide, looking for an oyster
that has been deserted by the waves.
On discovering one he waits quietly
until it opens it:? lips, when in goes his
pa1--. The shell instantly closes and
nips the intruding paw, but this is just
what Mr. Coon wants. He runs quick
ly :ishorc with his prize, smashes its
shell on the nearest stone and devours
his prey with all the relish of a human
gourmand. Cases have been observed,
however, in which the tables were de
cidedly turned. The oyster is some
times too firmly fixed to be dragged
loose, and in this ca-e the adventurous
coon finds himclf in a sad plight. The
oyster will neither come nor let go.
The tide rises inch bv inch. Slowly tho
unlink v oysterin in is overwhelmed by
the .swelling waves, and looses his life
iu his oiiort to obtain an epicurean
meal. It is a marked instance of the
biter bit."
'I he fishing proclivities f the raccoon
are not eouiuied to the oyster. The
(milling creature go.-s crab-lUliing in a
soin.'vvhat similar manner, f-or thi
pur,ioso it uses its tai! as :; fishing line,
drops it into!.'a water, and waits ipiiet
Iy until some nv estimating cra make
an assault with its nippers on the living
bait. Instantly the tail i.s jerked out ol
tt.e water, and usua ly the crab with it.
As to the suhso pi. nt fate of the verdant
crab nothing need Ie said, it can Ik
let to the leader's imagination. - t'hi'a
dclpuia L'trord.
Don't Watch the Roys.
The latest nuisance that has been
sprung upon an inoffensive public, i
the boy with a watch. A bov Lt natur
ally an infliction in liiin-elf, but much
Ls lorgivon to him. simply because he
is a hoy. Rut when ho p-tsscsses a
watch he ceases to le a boy, and be
comes a little man. Such a being rode
dywn on a Cass avenue car the otiior
day. Instead of sprawling over the end
of the ear outside, making fares at big
bos, and bulhing the little ones, he
walked in with the air of a man about
town, paid his fare, and sat down be
side an elderly gentleman, to whom he
seemed to occupy the relation of father.
Then he looked at his watch, started,
put it to his oar. felt reassured, and re
marked that the town clock was wrong.
Next, he turned his cIImiws out, spread
his hands on his knees, and took no
note of time for a minute and a half,
when his elderly companion asked hur
riedly, with a wicked twinkle in hi;
eye:
"George, i.s your watch going?"
" Going where?"' Then he recalled
himself with a distracted gesture, drew
forth that wretched timepiece, and said
with awful severity:
"Half-past-quarler-after-four. Hadn't
vou better set vour watch by mine,
father?"
It stands lo reason that a boy can not
have a watch and retain that sweet
boyishness which is the d-l'ght of his
parents, ami tho terror of the neighbor
hood. How can he tear through back
alleys, and over vacant lots "n "hi spy'
with a watch in his pocket, or crawl
under sidewalks and circus tents with
ease and propriety if timed down by au
hour hand? How can he stand on his
hoatf, or make a wheelbarrow of him
self, or do cartwheels, or "wnisscl' foi
the championship of the crowd? What
excuse can ho give for beinjj late at
school, and early at a fire? o; don'i
watch the innocent youth. Don't let
him begin in his early years to go or
tick.
" Put away the little ticker
That our durlmx fondly wore.
Is It broken I shou'd snicker
Gone into our uncle's store.
'Twas a nickel-plate, stem-winder"
Whir-whir-whir-whir-r-r-r-r.
(Machine busted.)
Detroit Free Press.
According to Mr. Walter Besant'j
statistics, novels constitute nine-tenth:
of the books read in England and nine-tecn-twentieths
of the books read in the
-world.
An exchange asks: "What wil
make lamp chimneys bright an
clear ?" Soap and water ought to.
V. V. Graphic.
1'EitSOXAL AND LITERARY.
- -Whittier tolls an inquirer that hit
poem of "Barbara Fritchio" is founded
on fact.
l'hilippo D'Enncry author of "The
Two Orphans." is said to havo amassed
a fortune of $-',000,000 from tho uearlv
three hundred plays lie has written.
The productions of tho press, fast
as steam can make and carry them, gf
abroad through tho land, silent as
show-llakes. but potent as thunder.
Chuptn.
Mrs. John Jacob Astor has given a
gold watch and one hundred dollars to
each one of her servants as a thank-offering
for the recent recovery of hex
health.- -X. 1'. Times.
Sarah Bernhardt wears a jersey
when she plays "Lady Macbeth."
When the French Macbeth first saw lie
in that costume ho involuntarily ex
claimed: "ls this a daggor I see before
mo?" .V. Y. Montinij Journal.
John C. Eno, tho lato New York
Bank l'rcsidcut who ma de way with
some four millions of tho bank's
money, is described as a very youc
man. who prides himself on his "fuazy
little mustache and his good looks.
Thero has lately appeared a book
called "A Lover's Dictionary a foeti
cal treasury of lover's thoughts, fan
cies, addresses aud dilemmas, and a
complete guide to thw study of the ten
der science."' An English newspaper
suggests that they might havo called it
"The Complete Angler" and bo done
with it.
When Mrs. Hcnrv Ward Beecher
was" reminded that (lonry Irving, tho
actor, had in his book on America de
scribed her as at first cool in her recep
tion of Ellon Terry tis a guest, but had
at the end of the visit been so entirely
captivated by tho actress as to impul
sively embrace her and weep in her
arms, she simply answered: "Non-
sense!" Ar. Y. Tribune.
Lovcring, the brilliant Harvard
student who worked himself to death,
has been known to make $1,200 in two
months just beforc the mid-yoar exam
inatins. His custom was to give luct
ures in his college-room to large groups
of students who were behiudhaud iu
thoir studies, and his lectures were so
valuade that students were willing to
pay a large admission fee. Hurt) or d
Pol.
The only daughter of Minister Rus
sell Lowell is the wife of Edward Bur
nett, sou of the famous cocoainu manu
facturer. She is a demure little lady,
and bears a slight resemblanco in looks
to her distinguished father. She is
noted as one of the best horsewomen in
New England. Last summer she went
across the ocean alone, in order to
spend a few weeks with her father, and
returned as she went. Boston Herald.
HUMOROUS.
Why are pawnbrokers liko pioneers
of progress? Because thoy are alvvaya
ready to make an advance.
The gentle spring and the mellow
autumn go for nothing with soldiers.
All they ask for is goodMarchweathor.
- Thomas Burch writes to ask a Mas
sachusetts paper if the editor recollects
him. The Burch we remember was not
spelled that way. -Chicaao Herald.
"John, what is tho best thing to
feed a parrot on?" asked an elderly
of her bachelor brother, who hated par
rots, "Paris green," gruflly auswerod
John. X. Y. Lcdyer.
"How fresh and green everything
looks!" murmured ( laribell, as they
waiiderod along tho road. "Every
thing?'' questioned Adolphus, looking
down into her violet eyes. "Yes, ev
erything.' she replied, abstractedly.
He wanders with another girl uow.
Boston 1'osl.
Mr. Whackem. a fiery school
master. lo-t another scholar yesterday.
The class was parsing a sentence.
"What is the imperative of thu verb 'to
go?'" said Whackem to JolmnvFi.k
top. "I don't know." "Go!""shouted
Whackem. "Thank you, sir," replied
John::, and he was two streets oft" be
forc the teacher could catch his breath.
"Poor Spooks," said one gentle
man to another as the young man re
ferred to staggered by; "he has gone to
the bad entirely." :'," replied, the
other, "he is most, certainly lost."
"Can you tell me,'' asked the firsJ
speaker, "why he is liko a conun
drum?" "No. I can not; why?" "Ro
causo nearly vvvry body has given him
up.' At'antu Coii.itztulion.
-"I wonder what gives h"r such a
glorious voice." murmured Ethel, as
f'atti bowed oft" the stage, and the roof
lose and fell with the violence of tho
applause. "Reeause." whispered Cuth
bert in her shell-like ear, "because, lika
Cleopatra, she has been drinking pre
cious tones." And Kthcl was so shocked
that she ate up every one of the cara
mels without offering CuthLert a soli
tary bite.- Hoehland Courier.
"Thero is no animal that can resist
moths," says a scientific writer.
Wrong, brother! seals kin. That is tho
very best reason to i urged in favor of
buying a sealskin cloak, where neither
moth nor rust doth corrupt aud enough
monoy can be raised upon its summer
board with an uncle to go abroad on.
No family should !; without one o
these useful and suggestive garments.
This may seem far-fetched, but it cam
phor. -Detroit Free Toss.
"Papa, what i.s a bat:" "It id
what base-ball plavers use. my child."
"I know that; but isn't there another
kind, papa'."' "Yes. there's a bird called
a bat." "I know that, too, but isn't
there anothci one?"' "No, I guess not,
dear, why do you ask?" "Because I
heard Uncle John tell mamma that you
went on a frightful bat last night."
Papa said nothing, but made up his
-mind to give I'm-lo .John a laying-out
next time he saw him. -V. Y. JourHut.
Ycry Cetisi derate.
"And you say that -aw you can
not be mine," said Mr. Alphonso Kitz
Foodie as he ceased sucking the knob
of his cane and examined it attentively to
sco that he had not removed any of tho
varnish iu his effort to amuse himself.
"No, I can uevcr be yours," the faic
maiden answered. " You suit very
well as an ornamental appendage at
parties, but I am afraid you would not
wear well as a husband.'
"Yet aw- aw -I have heard you say
I possess some excellent qualities.
" I admit it- You do possess son
excellent qualities. You are very kind
hearted and extremely considerate to
your enemies."
"Considerate to my enemies?"
" Yes. For instance, you never pul
an enemy in your mouth to steal awaj
your brains.'
"No. nevah."
" Well, that shows you to bo verj
considerate."
In what wespect?"
" In not iaposiig.on an enemy an baa
ynwttrffi t&k."8mt0vith Jmrnal.
v"Sp-iS.J