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VOL. XIIL--NO. $9.
COLUMBUS, NEB., WEDNESDAY. APRIL 4, 188B.
WHOLE NO. 673.
THE JOURNAL.
ISSUED EVKEY WEDNESDAY,
M. K. TTTRJS'.ER & CO.,
Proprietors aad Publisher!.
S3-OFFICE, Eleventh St., vp stairs
ih Journal Building.
4 SaV.'
m
iifiwlws
-
1TJSDTESS CARDS.
DEJTAL PABIOR.
On Thirteenth St., and Xebraska Ave
over Friedhofs store.
jy Office hours, 3 to 12 a. m.; 1 to " p. m.
Olla ASHBaugh, Dentist.
0
lOs:IX.HJ9 SUaAIYAI".
ATT0HXETS-A7-LA Wt
Up-stairs in Gluck Building, 11th street,
Above the New bank.
TT J. OII1WMMU
NOTARY PUBLIC,
12th Strtet. t Joor went or Hsnaoad Hoatt,
Columbus, Neb. 491-J
Ta. M. O. THWKSTOJf,
RESIDENT DENTIST.
Office over corner of 11th snd Nortb-st.
All operations lir.t-clas and warranted.
C
1BIC4GO HAKIER HHOP!
HKSttY WOODS, Pkop'R.
j3TEvervthing in first -class style.
Also keep the bet of oisrars. &ly
f KKR Sc KKEDER,
.4 TTOItXEYS A T LA W,
Office on Olive St.. Columbia. Nebra-ka.
i-tf
C
G. A. IU'LLHOUST, A. M.. M. D.,
HOMED PA Till C I'll l'Sl CIAX,
gTvi-o Blocks -outh of Court House.
Telephone communication. 5-ly
lrcALLlSTES BKOS.,
A TTORXEYS A T LA W,
Office up-stairr in McAlli-ter'a build
ing. 11th St. W. A. McAllister, Notary
Public.
J. M. MACFARLAXD. B. It. CWDERY,
Attsr7 isi Scary hi?:. C:lU:::r.
LAW A$b COLLECTION OFFICE
OF
MACPARXiANDA COWDIR7,
Columbw, : ' -' Nebraska.
p KO. X. DKKKY,
PAIXTER.
J2Tarriae, houe and 'ij;n 'painting,
pluziu. paper banning, kaNomiuinir, etc.
done to order. Shop on 13th St., opposite
Enirine Ilou-i-, Culumbu-, Neb. 10-y
"P II.RI'MCHIm
llth St., nearly opp. Gluck's store,
S 1 Harness. Saddles. Collars, Whipn,
B nketa, Curry Combs, Hruahes, etc.,
ut the lowest j.oible price;.. Hepairs
pr mptly attended to.
G
W. C'LAKK,
LAND AND 1NSUBAXCE AGENT,
lU'Ml'IlHEY, NEBH.
His lands comprise some tine tracts
In the Shell i reek Valley, and the north
ern portion ol PI tie county. Taxe
paid for iion-res:deut. satisfaction
guaranteed. :? y
J OU1S SCIIREIBER.
ILACKSMITH AND WAGON MAKER.
All kind of rpairinj; done on short
notice. Btiiri:ie-, Wagons, etc., made to
order, and all work iruarauteed.
j3"Shop oppoite the "Tattercall,"
Olive Street. -23
"VJ"OTICR lOTICArilERS.
J. B. Moncrief. Co. Supt.,
Will be in his office at the Court House
ou the lir-t Saturday of each
month for the purpose of examining
applicants for teacher's certificates, and
for the tranactton of any other huiuess
pertaining to schools. r-tJT-y
CONTRACTOR AND BUILDER.
Plans and estimates -upplied for either
frame or brick buildings. Good work
guaranteed. Shop on l.'lth Street, near
St. Paul Lumber Yard. Columbu. Ne
braska. ")- "mo.
J. WA&NER,
Liverv and Feed Stable.
Is prepired to furnish the public wfth
good team-, biurie and carriage- for all
occasions, especially for funerals. ANo
couducts a sale tabfe. 44
D.T. Martyx, M. P. F. schuo. M. D.,
( Deutscher Art:.)
Drs. MAETYN & SCHTIO,
U. S. Examining Surgeons,
Local Surtreou. Union Tacitic and
O., N. All.n. It. R'.
COLUMBUS. NEBRASKA.
:i-2-ol-xiii-v
WILLIAM RYAN,
DEALKR IX
KENTUCKY WHISKIES
(Fines. Ale. Cigars and Tobacco.
rTSchilz's Milwaukee Beer constant
ly on hand. 51
EUEVEXTH ST COLUMBUtT. NKB.
JS. BURDOCK & SON,
Carpenters and Contractors.
Have had an extended experience, and
will guarantee satisfaction in work.
All kinds of repairing done on short
notice. Our motto is, Good work and
fair prices. Call and give u an oppor
tunitytoestimateforyou. J53"Shop on
;13th St, one door west of Friedhof &
"Co'a. store, Columbus. Nebr. 483-v
THE .
COLUMBUS FLAX AND TOW CO.,
Are prepared to receive and pay $3.00 per
ten.for good clean flax straw (free from
foreign substances) delivered on their
grounds near the Creamery, in Colum
bus Nebraska.
COLUMBUS FLAX & TOW CO.,
GEO. SMITH. Ag-t.
Columbus, Dec. 5, 1S32. 32-3ni
COLVABVi
Restaurant and Saloon!
E. D. SHEEHAN, Proprietor.
yarwholesale ind Beta.il Dealer in For
eiirn "Wines, Liquors and Cigars, Dub
lin Stont, Scotch and English Ales.
& Kentucky Whiskies a Specialty.
in their season, by the case
can or dish.
lath Street, Seat's ef
ADTMTIIBMMTS.
$1:90
Salt at J. B. Dels
man's for $1.90 a bar
rel, and everything
at accordingly low
prices.
49-tI
NEBRASKA 'HOUSE
f.
S. J. MARMOT, Prvp'r.
Nbraska Ave., South of Dpot,
COLV.HBVH, TRIB.
- . -i " j:
A new h'ouse, newly furnished. Good
accommodations. Board by day or
wees: at reasonable rates.
tSTMetM a Fint-Claiui Xable.
Meals, .... 25 Cts. Lodgings.... 25 Cti.
38-2tf
H. LITERS & CO,
BLACKSMITHS
AND
Wagon Buildeis,
Sew Erirk Shop opposite Urlntz's Drug Start.
ALL KINDS OF WOOD AND IRON WORK ON
WAGONS AND BUGGIES DONE
ON SHORT NOTICE.
Eleventh Street, Columbus, Nebraska.
D YOU WANT THE BEST
W Illustrated Weekly Paper
published? If so, sub
0 scribe for Tk. WnUj
Ormpklo. It contains four pages
of illustrations and eight pages
of reading matter. It is terse.
It is vigorous. It is clean and
healthy. It gives all the news.
Its home department is full of choice
literature. Fanning interests receive spe
cial and regular attention. It treats inde
pendently of politics and affairs. During
the year it give over 200 pages of illustra
tions, embracing every variety of subject,
from the choicest art production to the
customs, manners and noteworthy incidents
and averyday scenes of every people ; and
Cartoons upon events, men and measures.
Try it a year, subscription price $2.50 a year.
Sample copies and terms to agents, 5 cents.
Addbess THE WrEEKLY GRAPHIC,
182 & 1S4 Dkabbobx Street, Chicago.
We offer The "Weekly Graphic In
Club with
The Columbus Journal
For $.".90 a year in advance.
COLUMBUS
STATE BANK!
3i::t!unt3 3tmrl s Siil i:i liner a Eslit.
COLUMBUS, JEB.
CASH CAPITAL, - $50,000
DIRECTORS:
Leander Gkrbakd, Pres'i.
Geo. W. Hulst, Vice Pres't.
Jolics A. Reet.
Edward A. Gerhard.
Abn'er Turker, Cashier.
ftatak of Deposit, Dliicoami
aatd Exchassaje.
CoIlectiBH Praaaptly Wade oa
mil PelatM.
Pay latereMt ea Time Icbom.
274
ALL PARTIES WANTING THE
-ACME-
rW?M
POLVEH Hffli !
CLOD CRUSHER
AND-
LEVELER!
IN
BUTLER, PLATTE, DODGE,
COLFAX it- SA UXDERS
COUNTIES,
Will send their prdere to
T. W. HUNT & CO.,
SCHUYLER, NEBR.
45-4t
SALARY $20
Per week to live agents. Something new.
Sells on sight. The Temple of Life;
representing the Past, Present and Fu
ture. A fine lithograph in six elegant
tints. Size 22x33. Send stamp for circuit-
inmi i a- v& ! . u
' iwrii a .r. riiaswi,
4d-C
fp(iE9KVWBSBikBiaiaw9BiavFMH- jUt
-itir'ieftiEEaaiaiElC
r'
National Bank!
COX.X71CBX7S.
Aithorized Capital,
Cash Capital,
$250,000
50,000
OFFICERS AND piBECTORS.
A.-ANDERSON. Prtsft
SAM'L C. SMITH, Vice Pres't.
O.T. ROEN, Cashier.
J. W. EARLY,
-. - ROBERT UHLIO.
.HERMAN OEHLRICH.
i rtP.V. A. MCALLISTER,
G. ANDERSON,
P. ANDERSON.
4-0 tens r '" uj
Foreign and Inland Exehangej Passage
TictefnTKeal Esaie7toam ana Insurance.
BECKER if "WELCH, "
PROPRIETORS OF
SHELL CREEK HILLS.
MANUFACTURERS AND WHOLE
SALE DEALERS IN
FLOUR AND MEAL.
OFFICE, COL UMB US, NEB.
SPEICE & NORTH,
General Agents for the Sale of
REAL ESTATE,
Union Pacific, and Midland Pacific
R.R. Lands for sale at from $3.0Oto $10.00
per acre for cash, or on five or ten years
time, in annual payments to suit pur
chasers. We have also a large and
choice lot of other lands, Improved and
unimproved. Tor sale at low price and
on reasonable terms. Also business and
residence lots in the city. We keep a
complete abstract of title to all real es
tate in Platte County.
G21 COLXJIBUN. NEB.
HERMAN OEHLRICH & BRO.
Wliolos.tle and Retail
GROCERS
ALSO DKALER.S IN
PillafeHrjr'a Best Mimaesota, Seknyler
Saow Flake aad Sckajrler 82
Flour Always kept on kmmd,
Every Sack Warranted.
CASH PAID FOR BUTTER AND EGGS,
iSyGooda delivered free of charge to
any part of the city. 43
LANDS, FARMS,
CITY PROPERTY- FOR SALE,
AT THE
Union Pacfic Land Office,
On Lontf Time and low rate
' of Interest.
All wishing to buy Kail Road Lands
or Improved Farms will find it to their
advantage to call at the U. P. Land
OlBee before lookin elsewhere as 1
make a specialty of buying and selliug
land on commNion; all perou wish
ing to sell forms or unimproved land
will find it to their advantage to leave
their lands with me Tor sale, as my fa
cilities for afl'eeting ales are unsur
passed. am prepared to make final
proof for all parties wishing to get a
patent for their homesteads.
JSTHenry Cordea, Clerk, writes and
speaks (ierinau.
SAMUEL C. SMITH,
Agt. U. P. Land Department.
6Jl-y COLUMBUS. NEB.
WM. BECKER,
DEALER IN ALL KINDS OF
FAMILY GROCERIES!
I KEEP CONSTANTLY ON HAND A
WELL SELECTED S I'OCK.
Teas, Coffees, Sugar, Syrups,
Dried and Canned Fruits,
and other Staples a
Specialty.
Geeds Oelirered Free to aay
part of the City.
I AM ALSO AGENT FOR THE CEL
EBRATED COQUHXARD
Farm and Spring Wagons,
of which I keep a constant supply on
hand, but few their equal. In style and
quality, second to none.
CALL AJfD LEARX PRICES.
Cor. Thirteenth and K Streets, near
A. t N. Depot.
CI1TO
Lames
Glassware
Our Tonus Readers.
1EE LITTLE SPARROW'S TRUST,
This crumb Is mine, -said Sparrow Gray,
" Tne only oae Tve bad to-day.
And I ihmt!d be a silly bird
To give you half, or even laird;
For seel tne ground Is white with snow.
And may be weeks for aagbt Lknow.
u If 'tis.' replied the younger bird,
I'll tell you what I overheard;
1 beard some little children say.
In that great hruse across the war.
How they should scatter crumbs of bread.
That every Lire might bo well fed.
Till all the ice aad muw were gone;
So cbeertrp. Prsv don't look forlorn:
I'd rather gaze on miles of snow
iTaan see a bird with looks or woe."
' You simple!" twittered Sparrow Gray,
That's always just your heedless way.
Ko matterwhetber foul or fair.
It's 'etiirg, chirp, chirp,' without a care.
And now you think you'll be well fed;
1 hope you haven't been misled;
But time will tell. Good-day, good-day."
And greedy Sparrow Hew away.
The little bird waajeft alone
Poor wee. wee Sparrow, scarce half-grown:
Tae cold winds soon hegaa to blow; .
No shelter offered, high nor low; j
iMmHiafnl uf tan woafu itrnnwTut "
To tke great house at leaatk be -cornea
A little shivering, hungry bird.
Then to the window where be beard
The children's voices, straight he files.
And with h:s ehlrpinif Sparrow-cries
Soon brought them thronging t his side.
Then qu ck the sasli they opened wide.
Strewed thick with crumbs the sheltered sill,
Till wee, wee Sparrow had his till.
And chirping soft, as if to say;
I thank you, thank you," Hew away.
Dear little children! dear wee bird!
Could we but heed the promised Word
Of One who keeps both great ami small.
And notes a single sparrow's tall!
KlUaUth A. Davis, in Harper'i Youim People.
m m -
KXITES.
Lecture
by a Boy.
Reported for the
Wi ie Awake," by Mrs. A.
M. IW.,
The second of the John spicer Courw
of Lectures took place yesterday after
noon in Barn Hall, and was listened to
with attention, though there was some
disorder among the audience as they
entered the hall. Superintendent Dick
informed the assemblage that Mr. John
.vpicer was waiting to have a hole in his
trousers leg sewed up, and would be in t
presently. At this moment Mr. John
Spicer appeared and was greeted by the
audience with tliat prolonged clapping
sometimes called appladse". Mr. buicer
bowed to the audience and began as fol-'
lows, and was heard to the end with
quiet attention:
Ladies and (Gentlemen: My subject is
knives". There are two kinds of knives. ,
I will mention them: eating knives aud
jaekknives. You must not put eat ng
knives in your mouth. You can a jack- I
knife, because then you do not have any
fork. I mean when you are eating raw
sweet potatoes or raw turnips, or any
raw things outdoors. 1 ou can do nine
teen things with a jaexknife. I will
mention them- wh-ttle, sharpen pencils,
clip off linger nails and thumb ones,
play multipeg. cut knots, punch holes,
shock out clams and oysters, clean fish
es, cut your name on an thing, eat ap
ples and pumpkin seeds and other
things, make whistles, whet it on a
whetstone, cut your fingers with it,
break it. swap it," lose it, find it, lend it,
give it away. Every icllow that borrows
a iackknife ought to give it right back
asain. (Applattsi.) 1 don't meau be
fore he's done with it. (Appluuse.) A
jackknifc is matle of two parts. I will
mention them The handle and the
blade. You can have a knife with six
blades if anybody w 11 give you one.
(Appltiusr.) "Your father and mother
hardly e er give ou a six-blader. They
do not think it is best. Some l.ttle fel
lows have numb 'ackknives. Numb
jackknive-j are made not to cut. Numb
jaekknive are good for little fellows to
have My IittlT brother's orot a numb
jackknife. arkkuives are'verv easy to
lose. A feliow most always loses his
knife. He fee's very sorry when he
first finds out he can't find his knife.
He does not believe that knife is lost
He keeps feeling in his pocket for he
believes it is there somewhere, under
his hall, or his jewsharji, or his pocket
handkerchief, or 'mongst the crumbles
Then he begins and he emptier out all
these things, and turns his pocket inside
out and shakes it and stands up and
shakes his trousers leg, and looks down
on the floor, and puts them all in again,
and then he begins to hunt. 1 know
some verses av.out losing a jackknife. I
will mention one:
When a boy ttets a. shining new knife,
Oh a Jubilant boy U he!
Capering, shouting, prancing: chattering,
laugbltur. dancing.
All to joyfully. highdidilie-Ue!
When ho loies that shinini? nw knite.
Oh a s Tiowfut by is be!
Banting, snitbng, groping; whininjr, sigh.ng.
mopinir.
All o dolefully, oh dear me I
One dav 1 lost rav knifo somewhere
in the house, and 1 hunted for it in
ninety-seven places. I will mention
them" In my mother's work-basket, in
her other work-basket in her darn-stocking-bag.
in eight of her bureau
drawers, in six crack.-, of the V oor up
garret in the' ashes pail, ail over eight
noors (crawl ng. in the cookie pot, in
niv mother's pocket, in the bain's era-
.n: : tu ,r,i honi f7,.. ,
iicic:a. vfu ctcuiccu uluci aiicites.
in
the spoon-holder, in ten of mv father's
pockets, in fourteen of my big brother's ,
pockets, in two of my little brother's
pocket, in four of my" pockets, on six j
mant!epieces in the waste basket, in '
my sister's doll-house, in her bureau
drawer, in the bed-clothes chest, in my !
mother's trunk, in four of my sister's '
pockets; and all the time my knife wa
in my trousers leg, down at "the foot of
the trousers leg, insfde the outride part (
of the trousers leg, back of the linin"
of it
One time when I found my knife I
was sorry I found it. I will" tell you
about that knife. One da I had a new ,
kn'fe. I ne- er had such a ptetty one. 1
It had a white handle, and 'twas'a two
blader It was as good as a man's i
knife. All the fellows wanted to see it
and they thought 'twas a first-rate
knife. It had "J. S." on the handle. ,
I was so careful of it that I wanted to
keep hold of it when 'twas in my pocket;
and I kept sitting down and taking it '
out to see it My uncle who had been
gone five vears brought it to me. When
I'd kept that knife not ,uite two days,
there was a little hole in my pocket: a
little bit of a hole. It wasn't as big
round as the end of my little finger. I '
mean the very tip end of my little finger '
not where it begins to be big any. It
wasn't as big as a little white bean. I .
don't think it was as big as a pea. I
think it was about as big as a quarter of I
a pea. No fellow would think a knife j
could get through that hole. But I kept i
it away from that hole. I put things in
between, and I kept putting: my hand '
in to touch my knife. Well, 1 played
round a good while, and then we played
' I spy!" and we had to run every
where; and next thing I knew 1 put my
hand in my pocket and my knife was
gone! and my finger went right through
that hole! not just exactly the same
one, for that little one had grown a bis
g
e
one. My mother said that my knife
ruDueu ana wore tne noie out Digger.
Nobody could find that knife. A long
time atter I lost it I stubbed my toe and
fell down in the field, and my" hand hit
something in some grass, and I looked
there, and there was my knife. J. S."
on the handle. I was not glad I found
i I w sorry. It mot made ma cry.
It was all rusty and black, and yoa
could not start the blade one mite to
Tnake it come open. My father tried
ia I sever wasted to see it again, and
I dug x deep hole and buried it np. I
,know the spot, and every time I go bv
there I think of that knife.
' Once there was a boy lost his knife
and all the boys knew it. and they,
belped him hunt for it ; and when it had
'been lost about three days a boy went
j-anckleberrying with another boy and he
let bis basket fall down amongst the
huckleberry bushes and spilled about a
double-handful and that was about all
he had and when he was looking
amongit the huckleberry bushes trying
So pick up his huckleberries, he found
the other boy's knife. T mean that boy
that lost his knife and he knew 'twas
that boy's knife jastas Wellas'he wanted
to know, but he kept it private( Groan.?),
and he kept the knife out of sight, and
'obody knew He'd got it for about six
weeks'; and oae day when there'd-been
a circus and the boya were all standing
PKUieir ucaui, mat auue uruppeu oui
of that boy's pockefwhen he was standi
ing on his head, and then a little fellow
picked it up, and another fellow, one
that had gone over sideways when he
was standing on his head, saw it, and
knew whose knife it was in a minute
Applause). And the boy was so
ashamed that he cried He fold the one
that lost his knife where he found it, and
all the fellows looked at him so. Imean
looked at the one that found it that
he kept away from playing with the
boys for a long time. And when any
fellow lost his knife the other ones would
tell him he'd better look in that fellow's
pocket I mean the one's pocket that
found the knife. Ladies and gentle
men, many thanks for your kind atten
tion. Applause).
Step by Step.
I once stood at the foot of a Swiss
ii ountain which towered up from the
foot of the Vispbach Valley to a height
of 10.000 feet. It looked like a tre
mendous pull to the top. But I aid to
myself, "Oh, it will require but one step
at a time!'' Before sunset I stood on
the summit, en;oying the magnificent
view of the peaks around me, and right
ouposite to me flashed the icy crown of
the Weisshorn, which Prof. Tyndail was
the first man to discover by taking one
step at a time.
Lvery boy who would master a diffi
cult studj, every youth who hopes to get
on in the worldmust keep this rao'to
in nliud. When the famous Arago was
a school-bo v he srot disc; uraed over
, niatheraatiw. But one day he found
on the waste leaf of the cover of a text
book a short letter .from D' Alembert to
a youth discouraged like himself. The
advice which Ii' Alembert crave was:
Go on, sir. go on." "That littlesen
tence," says Arago, "was my best
teacher in mathematics.' He did push
on steadily, until he became the greatest
mathematician of his day, by mastering
one step at a time.
Forgot Herself.
I Aunt Nancy Ellis started the other
day to make" a visit to her married
daughter who lives in Pontiac. As her
son's wife was busy with her household
, duties, the old lady insisted on going
alone to the depot
"La. sakes." she said, "I rid once
' from York State to Ohio, and was six
weeks on the road; 'taint nothin' to just
go deown to the keers and git aboard
where everybody else does. I've a hull
lot of things to look after and they'll
keep me from bein' lonesome while I'm
waitin'.'"
So the old lady went down in the
street ca-s. got out at the depot, asked
the "p liceman" to buy her ticket got
it all right, and when the car was ready
1 was the first one to present herself at
1 the door. She went in and piled her
things into a seat and then went out and
. asked some one to "p'int out the con-
' ductor."
j Here's my ticket" she said, pulling
! the bit of pasteboard out of a brown
mitten, "and my things are set up in the
seat there's a" canary bird for my
grandson andabundle of flannel things
for the baby, and a lamp bracket for
Hannah, and a rockin' -horse for Sam
my, aad my 'tother gown for company,
and mv best bunnit and "
All aboard!' yelled the conductor,
and the old lady "felt hurt at his rude
ness -it wasn't the fashion to interrupt
1 folks that way when she was young, she
thought
Her son had gone home to his supper
and was asking his wife if mother srot
, off all right when the door opened and
the old laiiy walseu in.
"Why, mother, what's happened?"
they both inquired simultaneously.
"There aint nothin' happened! ev
erything went off fust-rate. I sot the
things in a seat and guv the conductor
the card for 'em he was kind of rude,
but law-, folks don't have raal good
uiauuris eiiuv muic-auu i can t see
.... ..-. -... .,. i r .
ere's anything; left, and vet sure
to certain I feel like I'd forgotten sura
thins:! '
" Whv, you didn't go yourself, moth
er," said Her son; "that's what it is."
I awful sakes, Jeems, you'-re right!
I felt in my bones there was sumthinad
I bad forgot. I never wuz one to think
of myselt an' I meant togo along nil
the hull time, and forgot myself; it can't
be my mem'ry's failin' as late in life ea
this?"
Her son assured her that it was
all the conductor's fault, and the next
day he saw her safely off, not giving her
a chance to forget herself again. Detroit
Free Prcs..
m w
Encouraging Him.
He had been with the establishment
five years without an increase in salary
and without getting higher than the
basement The day after New Year's
old Foggs came down-stairs for a look
around, and by and by he said:
"James, you keep things in pretty
good shape down here."
"I try to, sir."
"How long have you been here?"
" Five years, sir."
"And your salary is $15 per week?'
" Yes, sir."
"Fifteen, eh? Yes. Just so. Fifteen
dollars a week and been here five years.
Ahem! James!"
" Yes. sir."
I think I'll send you up-stairs."
"Thanks, sir, thanks."
"Can you sell goods."
" I think I can, sir."
"Very well. Til send you up-stairs"
"Thanks thanks!"
I'll send you up-stairs to ask Mr.
K "
"Oh! sir you are very kind."
"I'll send yon up-stairs to ask Mr. K.
if we can't afford to give you all your
evenincs. so that you can arrange to
clerk tor some grocer from seven to ten
o'clock. In that way you can probably
earn two or three dollars a week
and spin out your salary. Yes, I
think we'll let you do that ThL
house has always made it a point
to reward energy and honesty,
and I take pleasure in advancing you
step. There no thanki rua along;
Chicago Herald.
That Mke By.
He takes about as much interest in the
work he i-i hired to do as would a young
bear similarly circumstanced, and little
is the wonder. He is simply employed
as a human machine to run,, fetch, carry
and hold things. The office is to him a
prison.
He is frowned upon, reproved, sat
down upon and snubbed by everybody.
There is no one left for the office boy to
snub. He is the lowest in the class. He has
no one to kick. He brings with him a nood
lunch and eats it at tea o'clock. He re
tires into a corner and. eats between
whiles. He may at times be heard
munching and munching. Which makes
the nervous clerk more nervous, who bids
the ot&ce boy "stop that munching."
Which the office boy does not always
stop. But goes into another corner and
resumes munching, and renders "himself
thereby obnoxious to some other 'nervous
official.,. The office boy has a dull jack
knife, with which he whittles, sometimes
a stick, sometimes the furniture. His
initials are carved about in various
stages of incompletion. He has a ten
dency to leave half consumed bretd, but
ter and meat lunches in odd and unoc
cupied drawers. Which, when by the
enraged owner opened weeks afterwards,
emit rank and musty smells. By that
time the guilty office boy has gone. His
place is filled by some other miserable
office boy. There ii of them a constant
succession. Their identity and individ
uality are of no earthly importance. It
is merely a small and uneasy boy, who
munches and weats out the seat of his
pantaloons as he twists himself about in
his chair, and is sworn at and grumbled
by everybody.
Between his tasks he becomes absorbed
in a string. Or plays with the office cat.
Or draws rude resemblances to human
forms and faces with the stuaip of a pen
cil. If there be two office boys it Is next
to impossible to keep them apart They
will gravitate towards" each other like
magnets and chatter in the piping treble
of office-boy era. When "howled at by
the nervous person present, the piping
subsides into a confounded whispering.
This intensifies the nervous, clerk's ner
vousness, who arises straightway, knocks
together the heads of the two-office boys,
who thereat separate and -silently shed
teare, punctuating the sheddinga at in
tervals of thirty seconds with sniffinea
and repressed snivellings, which again
attacks the nerves of the nervous func
tionary present
If the two office boys can manage to
get just outside the office door or on the
other side -of the board partition, they
quickly make up for lost time and collo
quine. pipingly and possibly scuffle.
Whereat there is more howling arid
another twisting of ears or knocking of
office boys heads together, with the at
tendant coursing of silent tears down
dirty faces, all Being punctuated with
the usual sniffs and snivels of the office
boys.
Set these two office boys to the per
formance of any one task, and they will
together require double the time of any
single office boy. As a rule, the more
you have of them the less there is done.
Three office boys in one office will
eventually drive somebody into insanity.
Life is a tiresome, dreary thing to
that office boy. Men about him who use
him are interested and absorbed in their
business. He is not He has not yet ar
rived at the business stage of being. He
is a boy, or rather wants to be a boy, and
can't He longs for marbles, tops, kites,
traps, . skates, dogs, guns, rabbits and
Guinea pigs. He longs for a saw, ham
mer and nails wherewith he may set to
and destroy his father's barn. He h
being cheated out of his boyhood in that
office. He is the merest unconsidered
adjunct of the great business machine
a peg, a nail, a screw therein, to be used,
worn and fazged out in the process of
making somebody's fortune.
Is it any wonder that the dime novel
has such a fascination for the office boy?
That it is his constant pocket companion"?
That he pores over it when not in ser
vice? That he revels in prairies, buna
loes, bears and Indian fight-"? Where
otherwise is his recreation?
O man absorbed in business, turn aside
for a moment, contemplate your office
boy, put yourself in his place, and give
him a moment's consideration. Think
of the blood of youth demanding action
now stagnating in your close,"heated,
stuffy office. You can go in and out at
pleasure. But your office boy must re
main to guard your desk and papers; to
say that you are engaged when for the
unwelcome person who calls it is ex
pedient that you are engaged; to say that
you are out'and that none can tell when
you will return when for that certain un
welcome caller it is expedient that you
are out, and that none shall know- pre
cisely the time of your return. True,
you are bringing him up in the way he
should go, from- a business and com
mercial standpoint of view. j
i et for him it is now a dreary road.
He is as happy as the Italian' organ
grinder's monkey, who, inwardly protest
ing, performs his tricks, wishing all the
while he was climbing the trees of his
native tropics. X. 1. Graphic.
He Meant It.
"I was playing in a minstrel troupe
one season and traveling through Texas.
One night, I think it was in Palestine,
we missed connection and were compelled
to lay over. Frayne was then playing '
"Si Slocuui," with his wife acting as '
Lucy Slocum. As he was to occupy the j
opera-house that night I, accompanied
by several of our troupe, went over to
see the show. The hall was a miserable,
tumble-down frame shantv, lighted bv
candles and lamps. The light, you may i
be sure, was not the best in the world,
but, nevertheless, the audience, which
completely filled the house, seemed to i
thoroughly enjoy the play, and mani-1
fested their approbation by loud shouts
and huzzas, when the time came for
Frayne to shoot the apple from his wife's ,
head she was brought on the stage blind-1
folded. She was nervous and excited, !
and shook like my bas drum when I
gave it a healthy whack. The light waa
too poor for Frayne to see distinctly,
and it was plainly to be seen that he had
misgivings of his own power.
The audience seemed to take in the
situation. Suddenly one of the auditors i
a big, burly cowboy, with a sombrero
as wide as the Tabor stage jumped up
from his seat and pointed a pistol fair at '
Frayne, saying out, in a firm voice:
"Don't shoot or I'll pulverize you!" i
Frayne glanced down at the resolute
look'ing stranger, and seemed to be glad
of his intervention. The whole house
took up the cry, '"Don't shoot," and the
affrighted woman tore the bandage from
her ires and said, in pleading tones:
"Don t attempt to anger that gentleman,
Frank; he means what he says."
"Bet yer boots, gal, I do," replied the
stranger. That part of the play was
omitted for that night, and the Indians
had to be killed twice to make up for the
cutting of ' the programme. Ltnmr
F CENEKAL 1STEM3T,
A colored man named Hatchitt has
beam aeatsneed to oae year im b peni
tentiary by taa Wwifanon,; (Ky.): Cir
cuit Court for obtaining a beafstake un
der false pretensea, N.O. Picayiini.
Jennie B. Henry, of New Castle, Pa,.
sent np a toy baloon'with her nama and
address, attached, aad requested the find
er to notify her. In thirty days- she was
advised that it had descended at Star
berry, Miss.
The Nineteenth Century Club is the
same of a new organization in New-York."
Its object is the hearing and - criticisiag
of the most progressive, thought. ' Among
the members there are women as well as
men. N. Y. MaiL
Miss Emily FaitMal has fee fth
philanthropy bniinsafor,the last twemty
nve years, and yet a Chicago hackmaa
palmed a lead quarter off on her theother
day without the least twb3ge o'f-conscience.
Detroit FretPrem.
. For sasoe tiiaethe lettar-bage is the'
village of Cardross, Scotland,, have been
carried by a collie dog, who has never
made a mistake respecting his destina
tion, nor has he ever lost anything. The
postoffics authorities, however, have or
dered the services of this faithful and in
telligent public servant to be discon-"
tinued.
The sorrows of a Georgia editor are
thus depicted in the Montezuma Weekly:
"We donned a man for a three-dollar
subscription bill the other day while he
was purchasing six or seven gallons ot
whisky. He pulled out twenty cents and
gave it to us. We would almost as soon
have had a knock in our face for the
trouble."
A miner at the Albion reduction
works, Eureka, New, became so stimu
lated from inhaling carbonic acid gas,
mixed with lead fumes, while repairing
one of the tunnel fume escapes, that bad
he not been immediately secured he
would have killed three men standing
near him with a sledge hammer, which
he snatched in his mad fit
About six years ago a little son of
Mr. Henry Shatler, of Johnstown, Pa.,
fell dead in the street during a thunder
storm, and it was thought at the time
that he had been struck by lightning, a
presumption which was disproved by a
subsequent examination. Recently an
other son of the same gentleman dropped
dead while skating.
Fifteen cases of small-pox among the
female operatives .of the paper mills at
Conshghocken, Pa., had their origin in
the dirty paper and rags gathered from
the streets of Philadelphia and sent to
the mills to be made' into new white
paper, such as schoolboys chewinto wads,
with which they bother their teachers
and ornament thecitizen-L Philaildphia
Xeics.
A young man, arrested in Washing
ton for beating his father, excused him
self on the plea that he was following
scripture. "How is that?" asked the
Judge. "Whv, whom the Lord Ioveth
he chastiseth,"' replied the youth. "I
love my father, and so when he came
home drunk I chastised him, and I think
it's done him good." He was fined ten
dollars for misquoting.
The good people of Xeponset, Mass.,
have discovered what they had supposed
for several weeks to be the ghost of
some pirate king flitting about, "the
Pirate's Cove" is only another seeker
after the treasure which tradition sayj
some rascally rover of the deep long ago
secreted on that spot For many vears
periodical searches have been made by
fortune-hunters with more time than
sense at their disposal, but the presence
of some evil spirit or the absence of the
treasure has nitherto cheated them of
their reward; the latest adventurer will
probably not be the last
The American Machinist prints let
ters from over forty establishments en
gaged in manufacturing machinery, en
gines, boilers, tools and machinist's sup
plies, representing several States, which
tend to show that 1S32 was a signally
prosperous years, and that confidence in
trade for the present year is not lacking.
Taken as a whole, however, prices of ma
chinery and tools, are lower than they
were, and the tendency is toward closer
competition. Iron and other materials
that enter into machine construction are
lower, but as a rule wages of first-class
mechanics have not declined.
The car carrying the properties of
the Madison Sjuare theatre company was
wrecked recently, en route to Rahway,
X. J., and when the time came for the
curtain to rise at the theatre at that
place-the stage manager explained the
situation to the audience, and that the
actors would be obliged to appear in their
ordinary street cootumes, adding that
those of the audience that desired to do so
could have their money refunded at the
box-office. Not a person left the theatre,
and the play went on, the actors striving
to make up by attention to their duties
-what was lacking in the matter of stage
costumes.
The shortage in the beef aupplv
which was caused by the great drouth
of 1881 has been fully repaired by the
season of 1832, and beef ot good quality
is again plentiful. The pinch was felt,
however, until last fall. The potato
famine of last year still has an effect
upon the market, and potatoes are much
higher than they might be, considering
the crop of last season. One good result
of the shortage was the importation of an
excellent variety 6f potatoes from Scot
land. Many farmers planted th? im
ported potatoes, and the result is an ex
cellent tuber. Rochester X. V.) Demo
crat. In Como District, Nevada, there is a
mining claim which was Iocatad several
months ago by the Ely sisters, aged
sixteen and fourteen, and named the
Woodbine and DafibdiL These young
ladies, who are personally very attractive,
are at work developing their claim, in
the value of which they have great con
fidence. Like all prospectors, they look
upon their propertv as the coming rival
of the Consolidated Virginia and Califor
nia bonanza. They have already sunk a
haft eight feet deep and twelve by six
feet in size, doing ail the work with their
own hands and picks and shovels in
hard-picking ground. They deserve the
success which all their friends wish them.
Chicago Times.
---Mr. X says to his friend who is suf
fering from a very severe bronchial at
tack: "You ought to call in Dr. Tel!;
he saved my life this summer." "I did
not know you had been sick lately."
"Well, no; I wasn't sick; I was out
swimming with the Doctor when I was
taken with the cramp-', and I should
surely have drowned if he had not sup
ported me till help came."
The use of artificial leather is now
suggested for buggy tops and for up
holstering purposes where leather is now
used. The new material has the alleged
advaatage of being much more imper
vious to water than the.genuine or natur
al article, while it is found to wear longer
and looks better.
PKKS0X.1L AND LITERARY.
Victor Hugo will aot keep a plant1
or bird as prisoner, in his house."
The Southern pcet, Paul H. Hayne.
is a nephew of Colonel Hayne. who
many-think: had the better of Mr. Web
ster in the celebrated a-fi-umeat He la
a man of polished manners and natural
sloquence.
Surgeon-General W. J. Dale, of
Massachusetts, retired f;om office with
the incoming erf Governor-ttutlsr, after
twenty-one years' service for the State.
-He is the last remaining active member
of Governor Andrew's staff-
Joseph-Holt. President Bnchan-in's
PoHtmaste.-Ge. era! and afterward Sec
retary bt War and Judge-"Advocate-"eneral,
lives in ?t ict retirement in
Washington. He is a chil ihj-a wi 'Ower,
-aad is very, seldom teen ia public-
Major Burke ot the New. Orleans
Ttme-tasi0cra,-weBt to work in a
stone-yard sj .ccsunon laborer just
after the -war.' He "is-sow supposed to
be worth $500,000. and to be looking to
wards the United States Senate. CAi
cago Journal
Mr. I abouchere savs in London
Truth that "Anthony Trollope never
matle anything a proaching to 100,
000." and that the "mo.t h:ghly re
munerated and successful" author of
the ll-th century, taking into account
the amount of work accomplished, was
certainly George Eliot.
Mrs. Sarah Wood, aged 121 years,
d ed at Buiord. Ga.. recently. She was
a slip of a voung woman when the
Dec aration b Independence ' was
signed, and her husband fought " at tho
battle of King's Moun ain. They had
eleven children. She lived 102 years in
Buford and was for fifty years a mem
ber of the Baptist l hurch.
Rev. Dr. William M. Taylor, of New
York, in a lecture on "Book3." said:
"In reading novels I would advise one
to read it as Hebrew is read, backward
I'nravel the plot, and then youcanrcad
the book with an appreciation of its
beauties aud not hurry it over with
your ears lis. ening all the time for the
marriage bel's of the end."
Ca tain Nutt. who was recently
kille I in I nioniown. 1 a., only a few
months ago purchased a , roprietary in
terest in the Ha ri-biirg(l'a,)WvrnpA.
and intended, at the exp'ration of his
terra of office as Cashier of the Penn
sylvania State Treasury, to d-vote him
self to journal sm. He was a member
of the 1'cnnsyl.iima Historical Soc oty.
tht'ivlelphia I'res.
John G. Whit tier writes the follow
ing note iu response to an inquiry an to
the truth of a published rumor "that a
play from his pen w:t shoitty to be pro
duced "Thy tfnie wdl be lost in go ng
in search of the 'drama" of the news-
faper slip. 1 never knew of it before,
t is a very foolish lie. The idea of a
uaker play-wriht is unspeakably ab
surd." John F. Mcl'ona'd, of Indiana, has
been telling his reminiscences of Abra
ham Lincoln. He reports "Old Abo"
assaying "The death j enalty is one
of the rao-t dithYult uestions with
which ! have to deal. When a sol "ier
desers to go over to the enemy and M
caj t tired. I let the law take its course,
but when a nnm has been a long tim
in the service and has not had a fur
lough, and who. when on picket gets to
th nking of his wife and children, an I
fteaks or tall timber. I never let them
harm a hair of his head." Chicago Her
aid. " - e .
HUMOROUS.
''ne of the add-st moments in life
is when a man is looking through an old
vest and thinks he has found a ten-cent
piece, which, when 1 rought to light
turns out to be a eoiixh lozenge. Puck.
Old Mrs. B. came to town last week
from Indiana on an excursion, and when
she was ask-il why she was in such a
hurry to leave she" replied : "I've got
to ; you ee as how I came in on an ex
ertion train anil my ticket perspires to
night" Drummer.
A Fairhaven five-year oldch Id who
went to s hool for the first time, came
home at noon, and said to her mother :
"Mamma. I don't think that teacher
knows much." "Why not my dear?"
"Why he kept asking questions all the
time." She a-ke 1 where the Mississippi
iver was." Boston Post.
A child ha' ing sustained horizon
tal Relatons with His mother's lap. was
hea-d to Philo-ophicallv remark that
Spanking not only Pevelopcd the Bot
t. m fact of a Slipper's usefulness, but
also Afforded the Spankee anadm rable
pportunity of appreciating the Bea i
tlful and Wondrois Intricacies of the
carpet Pattern Denver Tribune.
The New York Sun has embarked
in the laudable busines- of instructing
its contemp oraries "esteemed" and
otherwise, iu th use of good English.
There aren t nothing that we can th nk
of what wo despise more than poor
grammar and loose syntax in the news
papers. The Sun are engaged in a good
work. orristoivn Hera d.
Here is a Welsh song. The Ameri
can who would sing it must first take an
emetic, a pinch of C'avenne pepper in
his nose and breathe the sulphur fumes
of a few matches. Then it comes natural
enourh
Chwychl ni-h oehl och uchau o cbowea
Ach ii wen achy chan
Iuchewftt 'vch tiv'a run-h li-h iarbnu
!uch wyi bach eweb o ch nchitu."
Once u on a time an editor in
search of food was com cl!cd to pawn
his diamond shirt-studs for a loaf of
bread. While conveying the bumble
meal to his castle a hungrv dog ran of
with it, and a few moments later rob
bers deprived the oditor of his watch.
Instead of being rattled by these unto
ward incident-C the editor smilinglv re
marked "I thank the gods that I still
have my ap: etite left." We are taught
by this little fable that true content
ment is the greatest of all journalistic
boons. Chietbjo Time.
"Father." he began as he entered
the library w th a hesitating te;. "may
I ask you a question ."' "Certainly, my
dear a thousand if you like.'" "Are
you afraid of dogs ?" Why.no !" "Did
a dog ever bite you0" "Never." "Did
one ever try to?" "Not as I remember
of." "Could dogs biteyou if they wanted
to?" "Whv. I p esume so but I'm not
nfra'd." "Oh. you needn't be a bit
afraid, for I heard a man on a Sixta
avenue car sav that he was laying for
j you and would put you where the dogs
couldn t Dite you ! He said you unloaded
ou him. .V. '. Sun.
Ma;or Gale Faxon bought a horse
from the pastor of an Austin church,
and shortly afterwards the following
conversation was heard : "You have
swindled me with that horse you sold
melast week." "How so ?'' asked the
c!erg man. very much surprised. "Well.
I only had him for three days when h
died.' " That's very strange. I owned
him twenty-three years, and worked
him hard every day, and never knew
him to do that whil I owned him,"-
Ttzai Sifting,