THE NORFOLK WEEKLY NEWS-JOURNAL , FRIDAY , MAY 15) ) , 30J1.
The Norfolk Weekly News-Journal
The News , Established 1881.
Tlio Journal , EHtnbllsbed 1877.
THE HU8E PUBLISHING COMPANY
W. N. HUHU N. A. Huso ,
President. Secretary.
iSvory Friday. By mull iior year , $1.50.
Entered nt the puHtofllco at Norfolk ,
Nob. , IIH Hecond clitHtt mutter.
Telephones : Editorial Doimrtinont
No. 22. IliialnoBS Office nnd Job UOOIUB ,
No. II 22.
Lndy Uccles being unnblo to deny
herself any luxury , has been operated
on for appendicitis.
A Mexican revolution Is like n Mex
ican dollar. It looks big , clanks loud ,
but it doesn't got much.
About $500,000 In silver went to tbo
bottom In the Mcrlda , nnd now the
mornmtds can have their new spring
hats.
Money , according to Wall street re
port , Is "distressingly easy" but the
men wlto have It are distressingly oth
erwise.
It Is mild that Russia favors wo-
men's rights. It Is high time some
one's rights wore fnvorejl In that
country.
Those Alaskans who tnrow the coal
Into the harbor scorn to bo taking
rather radical means to avoid the
Binoko nuisance.
I Gen. Wood says disarmament Is on
ly a dream of dreamers. Dut If people -
plo never did any dreaming , wo would
still bo living In caves.
The El Paso people seem to think
our soldiers should fight , bleed , and
die , to protect their right to sco the
battle from the rooftops.
The house 1ms voted to Investigate
the sugar trust. We hope they get
after those * people that sell sweeten
cd Hour as powdered sugar.
It Is not true that the secretary of
war resigned because the militia of-
fleers were always In the foreground
when the pictures were taken.
Many Americans are being present
cd to King George. They probably do
their best to conceal the damning fact
that they were born over here.
The people who vowed not to cut
their hair until Senator Lorlmer and
President Diaz resign seem likely to
save barbers' bills for some time.
The grand jury says there is no
crlmo wave In New York , but they
can hardly deny that there Is a per
petual high tldo of naughtiness.
The democratic house has begun to
purify the government by removing
300 officeholders guilty of the corrupt
practice of holding republican views
No doubt it's dangerous In El Paso
when the Mexicans are fighting , but
perhaps not inoro so than when the
cowboys come In to spend a week's
pay.
Henry Van Dyke has resumed teach
Ing of literature at Princeton , and wo
hope he gives duo attention to the
classic style of the baseball report
crs.
After Mr. Madero becomes presl
dent , the Idea that he alone should
have the right to do any voting may
look Just as good to him as it did to
Mr. Diaz.
The democrats In congress are
wrestling with the problem of tarlf
versus the presidential election. They
cannot decide on which side lies th
most votes.
Senator Stoneof Missouri wants t
Intervene In Mexico. The other sena
tors wish El Paso people were a littl
less curious and a little more dispos
cd to run.
The Informer Abbateraagglo was
called a hyena in the Camorra trial.
In our country the witnesses feel like
hyenas after the lawyers get through
with them.
Mexican soldiers are not very good
shots , Imt almost any of them can
shut their eyes , pull the trigger and
hit the United States two times out of
every three.
It Is not fair to expect the progres
sive and public spirited farmer to devote
vote all his time to dragging the roads.
Ho should pause ever and anon and
swat the fly.
The Mexican mess will seem like
smoking the pipe of peace to Henry
Stlrason , after his experience with the
war paint and tomahawks of Tam
many politics.
The democrats are trying on the
surface to capture the farmer vote ,
but when they think no one is listen
ing they keep Jeering at Uncle Reu
ben's whiskers.
The Ynqul Indians nro dangerous
again. They can't help questioning
sometimes why the pale face expected
them to give their land away and yet
look good naturcd.
Beventy-llvo thousand Americans are
aid to bo in peril In Mexico. If they
online their remarks to the weather
nd the crops and quit talking poll-
lea they'll bo all right.
Helen Taft attended the naval acad-
irfy dance the other night , and as
icr father works for a living , she was
nighty lucky to got into this nrlsto-
ratic circle unchallenged.
Four battalions of suffragettes arc
lOBleglng the Now York legislature.
Some one should ask them how many
lusbands they left at homo with cold
llnners and no plo cooked.
Perhaps Mr. Diaz would not feel so
Ircadfully about resigning , If ho would
ollect on what a good living our
ox-president makes Just by writing
ono piece a week for the Outlook.
Chicago's now chief of police an
nounces that "vice must remain with-
n the bounds of decency. " That is
iretty hard on decency , nnd Is Just
where most people do not want vice.
The Mexican rebels , having cap-
ured Juarez , want to bo "recognized" .
Having only seen their features peep-
ng out from behind some tree on a
dark night , wo flnd it difficult to do so.
Congressmen are praising them
selves In the Congressional directory.
Who can blame them for kindling a
Ittlo Incense to offset the offerings
of venerable eggs and vegetables ?
Jack Johnson Is going to the core
nation. IIo will probably bo accepted
over there as a bettor typo of Ameri
can culture than former President
Hot of Harvard , or Henry Cabot
About the only people who want
ho United States to intervene in Mex-
co are the speculators who were not
satisfied with the rates of Interest
paid by property protected by Ameri
can laws.
The original document of the con
stitution was Inspected last week af
ter being locked up nine years , but
t must bo longer than that since
any congressmen have read that In
strument.
James S. Sherman is mentioned for
president. His chief qualifications
seem to bo that as vice president ho
lias been able to put the motions and
count the votes without making many
bad mistakes.
Fourteen vote sellers get flvo years
: llsfranchlsement nt Portsmouth , O.
Now will the vote buyers get the
same exact Justice , or will they con
tinue to bo leaders of our political
thought ?
American experts are recognizing
Persia's finances. If they learned
their business well at home , they will
at once raise the tax rate , Increase
the assessment , and borrow all that
anybody will lend.
Wireless telegraph was a factor In
rescuing 3GO people on the steamer
Merlda , but lots of passenger vessels
are roaming the coast with no means
of asking help but throwing a bottle
over with a message Inside.
Something like 42,000 rural mal
carriers will benefit by the Increase o
salaries from $900 to $1,000 which
takes effect July 1. There are alreadj
more than 42,000 carriers and at the
present rate of Increase the total wll
probably go beyond 43,000.
The argument that we are getting
the bad end of the bargain in offering
a market with ninety million patrons
as an even exchange for ono with nine
millions , falls by the waysldo when
put alongside the fact that where these
ninety million people are buying one
dollar's worth of goods from the nine
million , the nine million are now buy
ing two dollars worth of the ninety
million. How long would that sort o
trade have to bo continued to affect u
in a harmful way ?
A sad but illuminating commentary
on the futility of human hopes wher
applied to getting rich quick is fur
nlshed by an advertisement which re
cently appeared in ono of the Sar
Francisco daily newspapers in th
classified columns. Hero it is : "
will sell I have 5,000 shares of a one
well known mining and leasing com
pany ; will exchange same for one set
ting hen and thirteen fresh eggs ( Leg
horn preferred ) ; only permanent In
vestors need apply. A. J. Moore
Rooms 20-21 Bacon block , Oakland. "
A couple of delusions , possibly. Ar
exchange says nearly every farmer
when ho has paid for his farm , edi
catcd his children , laid by some spar
change for rainy days , begins to thinl *
about moving to town , wheio wltl
sidewalks and other modern conven
ences ho thinks life would be Ideal
It Is till ho tries it. Nearly every cit
man hopes at some time to bo able t
own a country homo where ho ca
spend his declining years In qulctnes
and complete rest amid soothing in
fiuences of apple blossoms , song o
birds nnd hum of bees. Here h
thinks that life would be complete an
it is till ho tries it.
President Taft declares that ho bo
llovcs thoroughly in the reciprocity
bill , that it is a mistake to think i
will injure the farmers , nnd that it 1
not a political move on his' part. II
ays : "I have no disposition to inter-
ore with the prosperity of those who
lake up the bono and sinew of the
ntlon the farmers and 1 nm con-
Inced that In no way am I Interfering
with It. I believe that after rcclproc-
ty has been given ono year's trial no
Ide will think of Interfering with It.
believe this treaty to bo the best
hlng for the country farmers , mer-
hunts , laboring men and all because
believe it Is contrary to nature , It Is
lying in the face of Providence , to
nit an artificial tariff will between this
iountry and Canada. If wo take down
hat wall wo will sell more products
o Canada than she will sell to ns.
Vhcn you , gentlemen , como to see the
csult , I believe you will admit that
'on have been wrong In your fears
aid that I have been right. "
THE SENATE DEADLOCK.
Just what excuse the eight insur
gent followers ot La Folletto In the
onato can put forth for having de
clined to accept the republican caucus
nominee for president pro tern , unless
t bo to stir up still more Inharlllony
n the republican party with u view to
creating n condition which will result
n the defeat of the party In the next
> resldontlnl election , Is difficult to
inderstand.
The olllco of president pro tern of
ho senate Is purely an honorary one.
Jo principle Is Involved. That official
nerely presides over the senate In the
ibsenco of the vice president. The
office usually is bestowed upon the
ranking member of the majority party.
Senator Frye resigned and Senator
ullom , next in rank , has been suffer-
ng ill health. Senator Gallingor was
.he next in rank and the honor natur
ally and logically fell to him. Dut
eight insurgent republicans refuse to
nbido by the unanimous choice of the
caucus of the republican senators , and
hus prevent any selection whatever.
The eight insurgents are : Senators
a Folletto , Clapp , Bristow , Cummins ,
Gronna , Polndoxter , Bourne and
Works.
How any senator can repudiate his
party caucus in this matter , and still
claim the support of that party , is a
political conundrum. It Is apparent ,
lowever , that there Is a fixed idea
among this little coterie to stir up as
much dissension in the party ns pos
slble , with defeat in the coming presl
dential campaign as the ultimate mo
.ive.
TOWN GROWTH.
There nro two ways In which busl
ness men nnd property owners can
jecomo moro prosperous.
The first method Is by pushing at
their own business with all their
might. That is always necessary.
The second method Is by so uniting
with other merchants to make their
town grow , that all existing property
owners and business plants become
rnoro prosperous , through the growing
value of real estate and the growing
volume of trade that results from a
larger population.
Both these methods of expansion arc
needful. The men who adopt the first
method only soon find that they are
up against a blank wall. They find
that there Is only about so much trade
in a town. They may get some of It
away from thelr less hustling neigh
bors. But when these neighbors wake
up and see their trade dwindling , if
they make special Inducements and
show good judgment in advertising ,
they get their old customer back.
The general pull for town better
ment permits every business man to
grow without trenching on his neigh
bors' business. Thus it avoids those
bitter rivalries that occur where re-
tall traders are scrambling for the
same customers without effort to cre
ate a wider market in which all shall
share alike.
The business of chasing up now In
dustries Is ono attended by many dis
couragements. Three quarters of tno
propositions In the market nro froai
professional floaters , who are looking
for tax exemptions , subscriptions of
capital stock , and frco rentals , and
who will move elsewhere as soon as
they flnd some place to raise tha bid.
There is , however , a Constant per
centage of hopeful propositions always
looking for a llttlo assistance. There
nro constantly bright nnd competent
young men , who are given no oppor
tunity in the close corporations that
are employing them.
BEING PR'ESENTED AT COURT.
The sorrows of the American Smart
Set can bo read between the lines In
the dispatches tolling of the many
American women presented at the
English court the past week.
While Impecunious and mousey
school teachers are having the time of
their lives wrestling with rapacious
London cabmen over half crowns , the
worrited leaders of fashion are flut
tering with heart throbs and vexations
attendant on this supreme carnival of
red tape.
A plain simple little gown needful
to get by the court professors of flum
mery who regulate these doings , costs
from $500 to $700. Then a girl really
feels poverty stricken unless she has
a $100 bouquet of costly orchids. You
have to buy shoes of tradesmen who
charge $25 because they shoo the
queen nnd princesses , nnd the twenty-
four button gloves cost $10.
The traditions of the English court
require a very low cut bodice. You
could hardly make use of the dress at
oven the firemen's ball at homo , with
out extensive additions to Its struct
ure. A sensational fear would immed
iately pervade ono of our assemblies
lest It shout dbo about to fall off.
The matter of expense does not wor
ry our social higher ups a particle.
The acrobatic steps with which they
must prance across the hall , Is what
bothers those who have never taken
n training In circus stunts.
You nro required to make a dozen to
fifteen low nnd sweeping courtesies ,
pointed well over to the leo side of
the drawing room , so ns not to turn
your back on anyone. The Idea seems
to bo to see how near you can como to
sitting down on the floor without act
ually doing It
Ono girl got so tangled up In her
train a while ago that she rolled the
length of the stairs lllto n halo of hay.
Fear of a repltltion of this incident
no doubt caused the recent edict of
the court against the hobble skirt at
these ceremonies.
HUNNEYWELL'S SPUNKY WOMAN
MAYOR.
The city of Hunnowell , Knn. , has a
woman mayor , Mrs. Wilson , and a
break between the executive nnd leg
islative departments has resulted ,
likely to bo fought out In the state
courts.
Mrs. Wilson has called a meeting
for next Monday night. The flvo men
who compose the city council say they
will ignore the call.
The male councllmen seem entirely
too worried about the supremacy of
the male sex. They need not feel that
they occupy a position on the firing
line , with the fate of the masculine
world resting in the balance , contin
gent on their good defense.
If Mrs. Wilson can sweep the streets
cleaner , can nail the lid closer on vice ,
can run the business of the city on a
business rather than a political basis ,
the city council of Hunnewell will beef
of as little effect as was King Canute
when ho told the tides of the ocean to
go way back and sit down.
The foxy thing would bo to give
Mrs. Wilson unlimited rope. If she
falls because of the limitations placed
upon her , she will lay the blame on
the council.
Wo should advise that body to hold
their meetings on Mrs. Wilson's front
piazza If thereby they can demon
strate that a clear field has been left
for her operations.
That they would in the end win out
by thus bending for the moment to
the feminine blast , will bo forecasted
from the action of the new chief of
police , Mrs. Rose Osborn. She wont
to the store of a councilman , and tore
from his window a newspaper cartoon
entitled "A British View of Woman
Suffrage. "
If these women could not bear the
display of n cartoon on such a matter
of public discussion as woman suf
frage , they have no place in the rough
and tumble Of politics.
They might better run for office In
the Daughters of the American Revo
lutlon , where a preliminary mauling
might be received that would teach
them to smile even if their plumage
was ruffled.
SAVING NIAGARA FALLS.
A persistent campaign is being made
by the power companies to divert
moro water from these falls that are
one of the wonders of this planet.
According to the appeal issued last
week by the American Civic associa
tion , the companies now demand an
increase of 68 per cent In the amount
of water used in their turbines. The
current flowing over the American
falls Is already 'thin ' In spots. If more
is taken , the unbroken span of surg
ing tide will be cleft by the rocks that
will be left dry.
To many of our .p.epplo , the argu/f
ment for the sake of beauty has JIQ
force. To them naked tbrlcK walls ,
belching smoke stacks , ghastly cinder
heaps , look much better than the ma
jestic sweep of a falling torrent , be
cause they mean that someone Is stor
ing away dollars In his strong box.
The United States has never had
many ruined castles nor Gothic ca
thedrals with which to attract visitors
from the old world. Consequently the
stream of travel from across the wa
ter , compared with our tourists who
visit Europe , has been small.
Our natural wonders , Niagara , the
Yellowstone , the Yosemlte , the Rocky
mountains , have , however , a world
wide repulatlon for scenic grandeur ,
surpassing anything to bo found in
the tamer scenery of Europe. A cer
tain number of Europeans como over
periodically to see the wonders
wrought by the god of nature In our
streams and mountains.
And this return tldo of travel Is
tending to increase , nnd no doubt It
brings a revenue to the people of the
United States as great as the profits
of the power companies.
Why should ono of the things that
bring this travel , profitable to the
whole people , be ruthlessly marred , In
order that a few wealthy corporation
stockholders should be permltled to
make fatter dividends ?
Of far greater moment than this , Is
the argument for beauty for Its own
sake. Who that has heard the thun
der of Niagara's ago long voice , that
has stood In awe at the titanic force
that could throw up this stupendous
dam , can bear to think that these sublime -
lime tones shall bo allowed to fade
under the paralyzing hand of vandal
man ?
AGAIN IN NICARAGUA
Tempestuous Nicaragua will have
ad four presidents during n period'
f eighteen months. For the dls-
mtchcs this week say that President
Estrada has escaped from the country ,
cslgnlng his olllco In favor of Vice
'resident Diaz.
It scorns singular that a llttlo pco-
ilo right In our back yard should bo
overwhelmed by such n riot of wnslu-
ul war and plllngo with social con
Ultons about as hopeless ns under the
deepest shadow of dark Africa.
But war and gun piny is lllto meat
and drink to these fever blooded hot
icads. And ono of their revolutions is
10 tin sword comic opera sort of
jcrlmmago , ns the killed and wounded
n ono army alone In one of the bat
les of 1909 comprised 800 out of n
orco of 2,500 men.
The country Is now in n feverish reaction
action from the fifteen year tyranny
of President Zelaya , who was driven
out of office a year ago last December ,
clnyn suppressed any newspaper that
criticised htm , nnd such an editor was
ucky If ho got over the boundary with
a whole skin. People who had infor-
nation or money that Zelaya wanted
vere persuaded to give It up by being
dosed with chill peppers nnd alcohol.
The government got n 150 per cent
irollt on a tobaccco and liquor monopoly
ely , and no doubt Zolaya got a big
rake off on It , which ho promptly
salted down In European securities.
An illustration of Central American
nethods was given during the brief
ulo of President Mndrlz , who refused
o let the newspapers print Secretary
Cnox's reply to Madrlz's protest
against the American attitude. When
> ur consul posted Mr. Knox's reply on
.ho door of his office , Mndrlz sent sol-
Hers to keep the people from reading
t.
The now president Estrada , who has
jeen In office since January of last
year , was the Idol of the people as
their savior from Zelaya. But appar-
ntly Estrada has become involved In
controversies with the ncsf of para
site hangers on that hover like vul
tures over the treasury of every Cen
tral American state.
AROUND TOWN.
What's become of the old fashioned
"safety" bicycle , and the man who
thought It was some stunt to rldo with
out putting his hands on the handle
bars ?
And speaking of bicycles , what's be
come of the old fashioned man who
took his wheel in the house at night
so that It wouldn't get rusty ?
Likewise , what's happened to the
youth who rode all over town and all
around the county , just to run up his
cyclometer ?
With all the cups that have boon
hung up nt the Country club , this
ought to be a year of great golf en
thusiasm In Norfolk. ( The cups that
have been hung up , you'll find swing
ing at the side of the pump handle. )
There never was but ono windier
day than Wednesday. That worse
one was April 7 , 1892. We know , for
we rode n bicycle to Pierce that day
and had to walk back because the
wind was too strong to ride against.
How can you tell whether n tree is
really dead ; or just playing possum to
get you to water it ?
Sunday's "Mother's Day. " Enough
said.
Run any spikes into your automo
bile yet ?
Here either.
To tell the truth , we don't own an
automobile , and It's not because we
don't like 'cm , cither. If you insist
upon the facts In the case , It's for the
simple reason that we can't afford it
Now we hope nobody will ask us
again when we're going to get a car
or why we don't.
Norfolk , by the way , still needs that
hospital.
How would It do to run Mexican
war news in the sport column , with a
table to show the day's batting nv
erage , runs , put-outs , etc. ?
Why is the air always calm and serene
rene in the morning , nnd windier than
the very deuce along about time for
golf In the afternoon ?
We don't object to "Mother's day , '
but where does father como In at'
Personally , wo could qualify better for
father's day festivities.
Summer Is here. At least that sea
son of the year has arrived when you
can get your arms and neck burned tea
a beautiful blister playing a game o
golf.
But at that , the blister Is nowhere
near the kind you used to got swim
mlng all afternoon In the Elkborn , or
working barefooted in the beet fields
And ns a tanning of the hide , it can't
compare with the kind that "mother
used to make. " Those were "mother's
days , " all right , all right
You've missed something in life I
you never worked In the beet fields a
ten cents a row. But maybe you'l
get your fun some other way.
Speaking of Mothers' Day.
Three Norfolk women wont to a
danco. Two of them wore tholr datigh
tors' beads and a third was indlgnnn
because her own daughter was oh
enough to bo at the dance and woo
her own beads.
When Is the wind going down ? Yes
wo asked the cook , but the cook didn't
' know. Now who docs know ?
Mnybo the wlnd'll go down when
he grass seed comes up.
Or when the war comes to an end.
Yes , By That Time Surel
Or when wo got rid of that cold.
Wo sco by the paper that there are
00 now books in the library , but wo
can't find ono of them In the bunch
hat tolls about the wind or the grasa
seed or colds. What do wo have a
Ibrary for , anyhow ?
The supreme court has determined
hat oil and water won't mix.
Is It a sign of laziness If you never
lave had any ambition to keep a cow ?
riicn wo confess ennui.
Did the docllno of your stocks
caused by the Standard Oil decision ,
nuso you to lose any sleep ? Hero
cither , Pete.
ATCHI80N GLOBE SIGHTS.
Know It all , if you can , but don't try
o tell It nil.
Donylng It doesn't amount to much
as evidence.
A man can bo smart and not plead
: il own case very well.
If you are drawing wages you don't
earn , your rainy day isn't far off.
No restaurant over made n success
by serving olco and paper napkins.
When a man begins to look into the
future ho sees so much that isn't there.
What has become of the old fash
ioned boy who carved a picture on his
slate ?
Fortunately , it isn't easy to con
vince a sick man that he isn't going
Lo recover If ho isn't
When your curiosity runs away with
you , that Isn't a sign It Is going to
flnd what It is after.
Some men are such good mixers
that it Is hard for them to get any
useful work done.
A boy doesn't mind chapped hands
if the affliction permits him to wash
them less frequently.
Fewer farmers who favor the sin
gle tax Idea , now believe the automo
bile ought to pay it all.
A garden spot won't do much to re
duce your living expenses unless you
cultivate It a good deal.
You can't make a fair guess by the
way n widow "carries on , " how long
her grief Is going to last.
Our Idea of a cheerful person Is one
who can bo greatly pleased by win
nlng a game of solitaire.
Revenge may bo sweet , but It Is
another of those sweets that Impair
the digestion a good deal.
An Incubator chicken doesn't mind
being an orphan , never having had a
taste of maternal affection.
It might be well to bear in mind
that a sick person appreciates flowers
more than a dead one does.
Remember that there are various
ways of emphasizing your remarks
without swearing about them.
Parties are Important to politicians
nnd society girls , but other people
shouldn't take them seriously.
You needn't worry much about the
trusts grinding you down if you help
yourself up as much as you can.
Love Isn't so blind that It hasn't
been known to shift its course when a
better looking woman beckoned.
Our notion of extreme laziness Is
carried out by any reasonably healthy
person who eats breakfast In bed.
Before telling your troubles to your
friend , remember that he probably has
enough of his own to keep him busy.
Men can't all understand women
but there continue to bo a fair mini
her of bachelors who are never caught
Every boy regrets that in the course
of events , so many good dogs are spoil
ed by having women for their owners
Considering the kind of hats they
wear , women go to too much trouble
to protect them when caught out ii
the rain.
Try to save enough money so yoi
won't have to go back to the bush
leagues when you begin to get old am
worn out. '
Friends may be divided Into two
classes , but those who stay with you
until you begin to need them form the
larger class.
You may wonder that the fakir puts
up such a convincing argument. But
It Isn't any wonder , ho has to bo con
vlnclng or quit
If a man never wastes any money
ho is pretty sure to get rich , but if ho
is never going to waste any money
what's the use ?
Speaking of extremes , there nro
boys who can't Icarn to smoke , nm
others who don't seem to bo nblo to
learn anything else.
Do you sometimes doubt the possl
billty of getting an honest opinion ?
Then listen to ono expressed of an
other behind his back.
An ornery man never gets so far
down the line that ho doesn't ndmiro
a good citizen , if the good citizen wll
nly refrain from trying to reform the
. m ,
If you insist on running things ,
uiiko up your minds that a lot of peo-
ilo will be awaiting an opportunity to
give you both barrels.
When u woman becomes Interested
n a ciiHe , HIO ! has Shot lock Holmes
over the ropes In the content for the
leteotlvo championship.
A woman with half a do/.on children
lousu't Ilo when she tolls how easily
she IH awakened , hut there IH a siwpl-
clou that other people do.
Girlish wayH are excusable In girls ,
> r oven admirable at times , but when
in old woman affects them , people
login to wonder how she escaped ,
The man who keeps n revolver hi
ho house ought to have to pay a high
er tax on It than the man who keeps
i lady dog about his promises unys on
ils live stock.
"Thoro is n Ilo out on mo , " said an
Atchlson man this morning , "and my
_ rent fear Is that someone will dis
cover that It Isn't true. The Ho gives
no undue credit"
It IB remarkable how poor MIIIIO
people uio when the assessor calls and
io\v wealthy they aio when a daugh
ter lands a man and an expensive wed
ding Is on the program.
Probably the longest measuioiiient
of time , using the feelings IIH a gauge
Is that which elapses from the lime
ono sends a rush order for the doctor
and his sufo arrival.
If n man isn't henpecked to n cer
tain extent , most of the furniture in
his happy homo will boar llttlo burned
spots whoio ho has laid his clga-a
down in his own independent way.
If some people don't BOO a doubleheader -
header the day they como back with
their rain checks , they nre convinced
that It Is Impossible to get their
money's worth In this homo of the
brave.
California people talk so much
about their grandoldstnto that It Is u
wonder they don't say moro about the
earthquakes that occur there so fre
quently some people use them for
alarm clocks.
Convicts are always kicking because
the world doesn't receive them more
cordially when they quit their btato
jobs. It Is our hard-hearted opinion
that the convicts should kick cadi
other about this unhappy condition.
Mrs. Taft Takes a Ride.
Now York , May 17. The condition
of Mrs. Taft was so much Improved
this morning that it was announced
that her doctors had consented to her
taking an automobile ride through
Central park during the afternoon.
She will bo able to return to Washing
ton tomorrow.
Reach Potash Agreement.
Hamburg , May 17. The German-
American potash conference today
reached a full agreement regarding
the prices of potash and for an ad-
Judgment of a supercontingent tax.
The text of the agreement is now be
ing drafted and now contracts will be
arranged immediately.
Another Dirigible Wrecked.
Bltterfeld , Saxony , May 17. Parse-
val II , the new German military dir
igible balloon , while returning from a J
trial High ttodny , was blown against
the hangar and wrecked. Two pas
sengers on board the airship suffered /
sprained ankles.
Falrbury Votes for Saloons Again.
Falrbury , Neb. , May 17. Falrbury
yesterday voted to return to the sys
tem of high license of saloons after a
year of prohibition. The majority for
license was 1C9 in a total vote of near
ly 1.000.
Laay Decleo Recovering.
London , May 17. It was said at the
home of Dowager Lady Dccles today
that Lady Decles was making satisfac
tory progress toward recovery , follow
ing the operation for appendicitis on
last Friday.
THE STATEHOOD BILL IS UP.
Debate Will be Longer Than Had Been
Anticipated in Congress.
Washington , May 17. The IIOUHO
joint statehood resolution to admit
Arizona and New Mexico continued to
day with the prospects that the do-
clblon would piobably not bo termi
nated tomorrow night. Before the
debate began , however , there was considerable -
siderablo Informal discussion on the
democratic side over the action of the
rules committee in moving the adop
tion of the sugar trust resolution of
inquiry and nomination of the special
committee. The house adjourned yes
terday whllo the democrats were fight
ing on this question , many demanding
a caucus to select the committee.
Chairman Henry of the rules commit
tee was ready today to take up the
question with the possible modifica
tions of the plan of choosing the com
mittee.
Democratic leaders who had hoped
to dispose of statehood in two days at
most were surprised to learn that an
many on 'both sides wished to speak.
The amendment requiring the peoplo'
of Arizona to vote again on the recall
ot the judiciary , is the chief subject
of the discussion on the ono hand
whllo many republicans oppose rosub-
mltting the constitution of Now Mexico
ice with a proposed amendment because -
cause Arizona is held back.
Democratic members of the ways
and means committee resumed con
sideration of the woolen schedule of
the tariff bill.
At the meeting Monday , ono mem
ber referred to the "study class of
wool. " The members were given long
\
lists of figures bearing on importations
and revenue derived from wool.