R
.
THE NOHFOLK WEEKLY NEWS-JOURNAL : FKIDAY , FEBRUARY 22 , 1907.
The Norfolk Weekly News-Journal
THE HUSE PUDLISHING COMPANY
W. N- tin * " N. A > ' ' '
1'roitltlont
Kvory Kr"l ayi M.V m-ill l" r . .oar , U fc" .
Kntowl nt tlio poMollloo nt Norfolk ,
Neb , , an lu'coml rlnnn wnttor.
UtlltoHnl I
TMcuhonoHS "
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No. SS. llUHlnohrt Olllro und Job
No. H 22.
THE PENALTY OK SPEED.
Tlio Now York Control wreck , re-
nulling In the death of twenty-two pen-
faliilltli-H In serious
l > lo , brings the list of
rious wrecks Hlnco .Iiiiiiuiry 1 to eon-
nldernbly nioro tlnvn HOD. Homo of
tlicin linvo been duo to tlio failure of
linnmii agencies to t-nforco tlio block
signal safely appliance , but thla hint
disaster \vaa ono which may partially
1)0 charged un to the Aniorlcan public.
Tlio train that WIIH wrockoil , WIIH
ninnliiK at u rate of about seventy
miles nn hour when derailed. The
cnuBo of tlio accident .la a matter of
speculation. The coroner thinks a rail
spread. The speed of the train turned
tlio cars over and many were Injured ,
nsldo from those killed.
Americans conatantly demand great
er risk In railway service , because they
constantly demand greater speed. As
n nation wo seem to bo willing to take
chances on our lives for the Bake of
rushing through with things. The fa
tal train was running nt Hoventy miles
nn hour. It was tilled with people who
delight to ride at that furious pace.
That the public demands faster and
faster service Is shown by the patron-
ngo given to fast trains as compared
with slower ones. There's an Incen
tive , therefore , for locomotive build
ers to make machines that will run
nlong faster and faster , drawing coach
es behind.
As a nation we're looking for chanc
es to break records In time. And tbo
penalty for speed comes high.
The waving of red Hags In Chicago ,
flory speeches against capital , and all
that sort of thing , Is a continuation of
the spirit which prompted a man not
long ago to drop a bomb In a Philadel
phia bank. It's a dnngorous sign , and
ono that ought to attract the attention
of serious minded people everywhere.
The fact that there are In the country
nnd In tbo race members of society
whoso minds lead them to destroy by
preference , Is a serious Indication In
Itself. And , knowing of this condition ,
It becomes the duty of Intelligence to
quiet rather than nrouso to excitement
such as these. Utterances of drastic
nnd Iconoclastic typo fall na seeds upon
those anarchistic minds grow up Into
full-sized bombshells in a very short
time.
THAT GHID1UON DINNIOR.
Wonder has been expressed by part
of the general public over the fact that
the snappy portion of the Orldlron dinner
nor proceedings , which took place
some weeks ngo at Washington , was
printed by ninny of the weekly mnga
zincs of the country and by some of
the dally papers , but not by all of
thorn. The wonder comes through the
fact that the matter emanating from
the Gridiron club banquet was of a
Bonsatlonnl nature nnd carried a largo
news value. But It Is n mnttor easily
explained .
The Gridiron club nt Washington Is
an organization of newspaper corres
pomlonts. Not all newspaper correspondents
pondonts nt Wnshlngton nro members
but many of them are. They hold an
annual banquet about the first of each
year , at which they drop their noses
for news and enjoy themselves in their
private capacities. They put on the
grill nil of the prominent men In the
national capital , nnd bnvo much sport
in the pnstlme. They generally Invite
the big men whom they expect to
grill. But there Is nn unwritten law
thnt what goes on In the Gridiron club
Is of a confidential nature and that
any public man may sny anything ho
chooses without having n word of It
get Into print. The fnct that It Is the
Gridiron club Is n protection for his
utterances , nnd sonic spicy utterances
result.
At the last meeting of the club , Pres
ident Roosevelt and Senator Fornker
were Invited guests. There wns n
prominent cartoonist present , who
drew splendid likenesses of various
ist.
men as their names wore hinted nt. ,
Thus , when It wns asked , "Who loves
38c
Roosevelt most ? " the cnrtoonlst pictured
cd
tured Fornker. And on the other hand
when It was nsked who loved Fornker
srm
most , Roosevelt's face loomed up on
the sketch artist's paper.
That much wns given to the public
on the Sundny morning nfter the din
ner of Snturdny night. And not much
more. But as n mnttor of fact there
were a couple of pretty warm speeches
made by the president nnd Senator
Foraker.
Some reports say that Forakor spokt
first , others say that Roosevelt spoke
first. In stories which sny that For
aker led off , It Is said that he declared
In the course of his speech , that no
body had loved Roosevelt more thar
he. The president Is said to have nn
Bwered , Insinuating gome rather un
complimentary things at the Ohio sen
ator. Then Foraker , angered , arost
and , with white face , made the speed
fc " - . J-- - KTT
of bin life , grilling the president roundly -
ly for destroying conlldcnco In busi
ness conditions nnd tearing down In
dustrial proBi | rlty , Bonding out Bplo
lo make criminals of cattle men , etc.
The president. whOHo face twitched
Nltli excitement under this attack ,
nroso and made what la Bald to have
'teen the Hpeech of hla life , also , In
which ho went nfter Forakcr with
equal jnba. It la mittl that things be
came so teiiBo that Homo of the more
timid guests oven wanted to go home.
Membera of the club , who were pres
ent , heard the BpeecheB nnd , although
they know the nown vnluo of the Btory ,
they kept fnlth nnd sent out nothing
concerning the speeches. That was
Saturday night. Hut Monday after
noon from Homo nource , somehow , the
story shot out from Washington over
telegraph wires. Then the Aaaoclated
Press carried a very short account of
things In order to contradict some fea
tures of the first report.
And that la why papcra carrying Aa
ooclatod Press reports , or who had
correspondent ! ) In Washington who be
longed to the Gridiron club , did not
glvo the meat of this story to their
readers , The story wan not ono for
2hc public. It was like a meeting with
In the halls of a secret fraternal ordor.
Where the story did como from , no
body knows. It la not probable that
a mnn present nt tbo dinner Rent It.
It Is more likely thnt Bomo outsider
heard a dlscusHlon nnd , not belonging
to the club , seized upon the posslbll-
Itles nnd used them for his pnper.
In some wnys the report was n do
plornblo mntler. It hns destroyed the
secrecy of the Orldlron dinners. A
yenr ngo ono of tbo president's most
famous speeches was but a duplicate
of what ho had delivered at the GridIron -
Iron dinner. This was his speech In
regard to "Muckrakers. " No word of
It got to the public until some tlmo
after the banquet , when the president
chose to deliver It again.
CALIFORNIA'S RECENT THREAT.
Sail Francisco hns surrendered her
desire to exclude Japanese from the
public schools , on condition that the
Japanese coolies , who como to this
country to Interfere with American
labor , bo excluded from the country ,
The conlllct between the federal gov.
eminent and the state of California
over the admittance of children to the
San Francisco schools , Is rendorei
useless In light of the existing condl
tlons , but because of the dispute over
the point , It would seem probable that
the case begun by tbo United States
government to force the city of Sar
Francisco to admit the Jap student ,
ought to bo curried on nnd determiner
finally In the United States supreme
court.
The question ns to whether the federal
oral treaty takes precedence over am
annuls the law of the state Is still un
determined , but It Is 0110 which may
arise again at any time. For that rca
son the opinion of the United State :
supreme court upon this point Is very
much desired just now.
Now that San Francisco has los
sympathy In Its fight by admitting tha
the school question and the state'
right question , over which so muc !
frenzy wns crented nnd regnrdln
which so many henrts were set ben
Ing for the rights of the parents wh
were alarmed lest their children b <
sent to school with the yellows , wen
not at the root of the teapot tempo
at all , but that It was the labor prob
lorn at the foundation , there will bo
reaction In favor of a more centralize
federal control of all things. It ha
been brought out clearly In this whir
wind that there must bo n llnnl an-
thorlty somewhere , and that It would
be with the federal government ,
where It will operate to the advantage
of the whole nation , than with various
states , allowing each community to set
Itself up Into A supreme government
and to pass laws that will lock horns
with those of the national government.
It is the sumo old question which
stirred our forefathers into ringing
speeches nnd debntes when the con
stitution wns framed. It Is the same
old question thnt rose up and sent half
of this country nt lighting tbo other
half , forty-odd years ago. And it Is n
question which will be settled ono day
by concentrating more authority with
the federal government , nt stnte gov
. ernment's expense.
When this Snn Frnnclsco school con
- troversy nrose , California sent elo
, , quent telegrams to eastern newspa *
pers threatening to secede before they
would surrender their God-given right
to send their children to white schools ,
nnd to keep them separated from ori
ental companions. It was pointed out
that California was a powerful com-
monwealth , a wealthy state , and a
proud community. It was argued that
Cnllfornians were a peculiarly Inde
pendent 'people , fearing no mnn , nnd
that for the sake of their little chll-
dren's rights they would go to war , if i (
irneed be , with the balance of this un-
, Ion. The outcome lias demonstrated
that all of this impassioned outcry
was not for the children's schooling ,
but was based upon the competitive
labor that comes Into the Golden Gate
from the orient.
But for all of that , the memory ol
I the California threat is still ringing lo
the ears of thlH country , and because
of this memory there la n desire that
Iho constltulonal problem of nuprem-
acy In federal treaty or state law , be
Hetlled once for all.
Mack In the early days of our his
tory , Alexander Hamilton ntood for
federal power. Ho argued that all of
the authority should rest In the feder
al government excepting thnt which
WIIH expreHsly delegated to the Htates.
llln collcagucH weru afraid of the the
ory and argued that all power should
rest with states , cxcptlng that expressly -
ly delegated to the federal govern
ment i that local government , nnd just
as little of It ns poaalble , was the Ideal.
And llnmllton'H theory Is coming more
and more to Impress the people of the
country that ho helped to found.
In the early days there was no cen
tral government , nnd statea fought
It. Knch stnto made Its own tariff
lawa , nnd thus there became Inequal
ity In ports nnd n rivalry going after
business which resulted In the cutting
of rates until nn Injury wns worked
upon the whole country. And then the
states formed a combination a trust
for governmental purposes , so to
speak. They went together , each sac
rlflclng a little individually for the
sake of the whole , and the nation be
came recognized by foreign countries.
It was the centralized power that
earned thla recognition. It Is as the
confidence of a foreign nation In the
fact that a contract , or treaty made
with the central government In the
United States would bo observed and
carried out by all of the states In the
union , even though It worked more or
less hardship upon a few , for the sake
of the whole.
It's not a new problem , but an old
one , that we're uu against today. It's
the same old problem that the constitu
tion-builders fought over. And today ,
when various state legislatures are
making various sorts of unequal laws
to meet the same dllllcultles , resulting
In unfair results to the whole union
and to the citizens and Industries of
tbo whole union , incidents of tbo San
Francisco sort only tend to emphasize
the need of n simpler nnd more unified
authority , Invested In a central govern
ment to represent nnd net for the com
bined stntes.
RIDGBWAY'S FAILURE.
Colliers thinks thnt the failure of
RIdgewny's weekly magazine has been
a gross misfortune nnd points to the
failure ns proof thnt good things can
fall ns well ns bad. Colliers looks at
this failure through colored glasses
The failure lias In It more the demon
stration of the fnct that the Iconoclast
hns no permanent place In society , am' '
that the destroyer and pessimistic ng
Itntor against evil , eventually dies. II
Is a striking example of the demand of
the public In this country , and we're
lilco the rest of humans , for optimistic
things rather than constant battering
away nt the bad In the world.
RIdgewny's Militant was a weekly
magazine started some months ago.
It was to be n weekly , and was pub
lished simultaneously In fourteen
cities of the United States. It's mis
sion was to attack evil In all places ,
city and country , nnd to destroy sin.
Rldgowny's bad no time to the build
ing up of good things , nor to devote
to constructive effort. The public
failed to buy RIdgewny's , and the mag
azine has announced its demise. In
the announcement , Rldgeway snys the
printing machinery on which It was
attempted to turn out the magazine
were not perfect , and that the public
would not stand for poorly printed pub
lications. This Is well enough for nn
excuse. It Is not logical , because
RIdgeway's was well printed. The
trouble with Rldgoway's wns thnt It
wns n "knocker. " And the knocker
finds nn early grave , whether It be n
national magazine or n humble citizen.
Perhnps It Is well enough to let
Rldgewny's stnto Its own purpose In
life. This Is what It said : "Wherever
the strong are oppressing the weak ;
wherever the thoughtless are grinding
the helpless ; wherever selfishness
seeks that which Is not Its own ; wher
ever right cries out for a champion ;
wherever plutocracy or hypocrisy Is
opposing .democracy . ; wherever wo can
help along that better day there you
may expect to find RIdgeway's Mill
tank This Is an honest , serious ef
fort of ours to build up a fighting ma
chine , not for political power , not for
profit , but for the common good
Write to us or write to our editor in
your section , or see him personally
about some growing wrong that should
bo attacked ; some wrong In one o
your city , county or other state Instltu
tlons ; the failure of some public ofll
clal to do his duty ; some glaring EO
clal evil ; some one of the thousanc
crimes that men and women comml
against society for the sake of gold
See what a fighting equipment your
editor has for any campaign he mn >
take up. "
The mission sounds well. It is a
promise that , nt first glance , would ap
peal to many , because It Is spectacu
lar and because It savors of the spicy
side of life ; It promises lively reading
of a certain sort for a certain time
There can bo no question but that the
editors In this effort were serlouslj
bent on their mission to save the coun
I try. Neither can there bo a doubt tha
hey were on the wrong track.
For a few short weeks the periodical
'v' " ' . then It succumbed to n lack of
mtronafic' . That's the strongest sign
that It was on the wrong track , for
the proof of the pudding Is In the cat-
ng.
ng.There
There Is no question but that there
arc gross ovlls existing In this land to-
Iny. There can bo no question but
that evil always will exist. And there
s no cnso on record where nn ngltnt-
ng agent came forth as a reformer
ind Baved the country. The man upon
.vhoso teachings is founded the Chris
tian religion , wns an optimist. The
prophets were filled with gloom nnd
evil forebodings , but the grentcst lend
er of them all saw the cheerful things
abend , looked for the good nnd not for
the bad.
Running water purifies Itself , and
liuman generations do the same thing.
Every ovll net Is n suicidal act. Glvon
enough time , the evil things will de
stroy themselves. Corruption will become -
come BO corrupt that It will dlo a na
turnl death. There are many Instances
where vlco was allowed to go BO far
that Its vlclousncss rose up at last and
poisoned Its very being. No man or
set of men , nnd no magazine or set of
magazines , can purge society by keenIng -
Ing before the public's .gnzo the vlco
and crime and ovll doing of the out
cast typo of beings.
And persistently holding up to the
public gaze the worst features of life ,
has an effect wholly unsought by the
reformer. Suggestion is n powerful
agent. We're all more or less subject
to the hypnotic Influence of sugges
tions thnt come from the magnetic
men , nbout us. And to forever run on
and on about the vicious things , the
ovlls , the corruption , by nnd by pro
duces the belief In humankind that all
things arc bad , that nil people nro
tnlnted with crime nnd vlco and self
ishness nnd that thought breeds evil-
germs.
To constantly keep In public mind ,
by agitation , the bad that Is around us ,
makes more bad people nnd does not
reform those who nro attacked. An
nttnck nntngonlzes nnd forever sur
renders the possibility of chnnglng the
ways of the man who is the target
The Iconoclast is almost as vicious
a member of society as the Ignorant
criminal , and his destruction may bo
greater. Anybody can tear down , butte
to t build up Is much more a noble busi
ness. And the trouble is that one pes
simist , one Iconoclast one agitator ,
pointing 1 his finger at the dark corners
ami seeking out , the wrong and evil
can himself destroy more of whole
some spirit , more of hope , more of en
couragement nnd optimism , than r
score of builders can construct.
There Is no permanent place In llfo
for the knocker or the agitator. The
founder of the Christian religion bull
upon good deeds and charity nnd kind
ness townrd the sinners as well as the
good nnd the effect hns been n grow
ing one. Rldgewny was in earnest , bu
Rldgewny was on the wrong track.
RAILWAY MEN TALK.
One result of the agitation ngatns
railroads that has been rife over the
ountry , nnd which is coming to n
lead In various state legislatures
hrough the medium of hundreds o
) llls that are being introduced antag
onlstlc to those corporations , has beet
nn Incrensed tendency nmoiig rnllroai
nen to recognize the public as n vita
factor to deal with , and to take con
slderably more care than ever befor
n presenting their side of the story
: o the people at large. Publicity
which has carried the public's cry fron
shore to shore , Is now serving to car
ry the views of the railway men , many
of whom had hitherto considered 1
innecessary to talk for publication
It has been a clear-cut recognition o
the Importance of the public prints Ir
the forming of public opinion untie r
modern conditions.
During the past few weeks Mr. Hill
and Mr. Harrlman have consented to
be Interviewed as never before. In
fnct Mr. Hill hns taken pains to send
several long letters to the newspapers.
Many others have nlso paid l\eed to
the knocking nt their doors , nnd have
opened the doors In order to tell their
side of the matter to the crowd out t-
side. W. C. Brown , president of the
New York Central , has spoken. Theodore -
dore F. Shonts has given his views.
And Julius Kruttschnltt , director of
maintenance nnd operation on the Har
rlman lines , has taken the unprece
dented railroad attitude that complete
details of all wrecks should be given
maximum publicity as a means of pre
venting further disasters. Mr. Hill
told us a few weeks ago that railway
extension is badly needed ; that the
railroads of the country are utterly In
adequate to the traffic ; that the rail
roads of America , to keep pace with
conditions , ought to build 5,000 miles
of track and spend $5,500,000,000 with
in the next five years $1,100,000,000
every year for Improvements. Ho
pointed out that materials have gone
up , wages have * gone up , railway con
struction Is more expensive than over
before , billions of dollars must bo bor
rowed , nnd yet the public agitation Is
for a reduction of rates and railway In
come. It was pointed out that Presi
dent Roosevelt has never at any time
contemplated reducing rates , but that
his regulation theory Is merely * o pre
vent unjust discriminations. And Mr.
Hill adds that Instead of lower rates ,
higher rates must bo charged by the
railroads. A number of prominent
railway ofllclals have agreed with this
statement. *
And now Mr. Shonts has been
prompted by the agitation in stnte
legislatures , to express his views. He
takes the stand thnt the railroads , to
win the confidence and protection of
the people , "must throw down their
hands , " make a frank statement of
true conditions , and ask for help. This
Is what he says :
The attitude of the present national
administration on the question of
rates has not been to secure their re
duction , but to prevent unjust discrim
ination. Railroad rates in the United
States are lower than anywhere else
In the world , while the service under
normal conditions Is better. I do not
think that the public Is demanding
cheaper transportation so much as It
Is demanding safe , reliable and ade
quate transportation. In the matter of
Improvements the railroads of tlio coun
try , almost without exception , have
been pursuing a hand to mouth policy ,
which has proved costly to themselves
and Irritating to the public. Costly to
themselves because before improve
ments necessary to relieve existing
conditions have bcon completed their
capacity has been exceeded by the
growth of traffic ; Irritating to the pub
lic because at no time In recent years
has the public been free from delays
and annoyances of a continued state
of congestion. .Tho result Is that the
railroads are confronted also with a
etate of public opinion extremely bos
tile. So that the raising of money to
provide facilities so urgently needed
Is , under present conditions , well nigh
Impossible , although many of the cor
poratlons have sought to do so at the
risk of almost imperiling their credit.
The situation Is a grave one. If the
various states continue arbitrarily to
reduce rates , as some of them are do
Ing , and the various laborers continue
to press their demands for Increased
wages and shorter hours , the next un
precedented crop harvested In this
country will be a record breaking crop
of receiverships.
I wish to say , and with all possible
emphasis , that In my judgment the
time has come for fair dealing to both
sides of this controversy. The time
has come for what the president calls
a "square deal , " but we want It all
around.
There Is no doubt that in the build
ing up of these properties things have
been done which though , legally right
were morally wrong , but because they
were legally right and cannot legally
be disturbed , what Is the use of exploit
ing the new when no result can oe se
cured except to furnish material for
the charlatan and the demagogue and
to Intensify class bitterness ?
If any government , whether nation
al , state or municipal , permits any In
justice to be done to corporations sim
ply because they are corporations , the
real sufferer Is the small Investor.
Let us compromise on the best avail
able and the most practicable terms ,
Let the railway managers lay aside all
subterfuge and come out In the open
Let there be a maximum of publicity
and a minimum of legislation. Let
eminent financiers and "captains" o
Industry co-operate with the preslden
to bring about better corporate prac
tices. Let them lay their cards on
the table and say to the president :
"We will uphold your hands not only
In enforcing existing laws , but In ask
ing such others as are necessary to
prevent wrong-doing , but you In re
turn must protect us from the Irre
sponsible agitator , whoever he may be ,
Let us convince the public that we
will give It the best facilities Amerl
can Ingenuity can devise , and In my
judgment the funds required will b (
forthcoming.
As to labor , treat It fairly and 1
will meet yon half way. No sane cltl
zen or employe desires hard times
and If they realize what our latest sta
tistics prove absolutely , that the mar
gin between prosperity and bankrupt
cy Is not broader than a 10 per cent
Increase in the cbst of transportation
and a 10 per cent , decrease In the rev
enue received , they will join the con
servative forces of the country in see
Ing that no steps are taken for bring
ing on the crisis.
Mr. Shouts' plea Is one much In lln
with the president's attitude a pies
for not only regulation of unjust dls
criminations by the government , bn
also a plea for protection under th >
federal government's wing. It Is :
recognition of the tendency towari
federal centralization as against un
equal state restrictions and laws , an
an appeal for centralized protection a
against unequal and sometimes drastl
state legislation.
The letter of President Brown o
the Now York Central Is much alon
the same line. As bringing out th
point that many state legislatures hav
overstepped President Roosevelt's pro
posed regulations for justice and not
malice , by seeking to reduce rather
than to adjust the business , the fol-
lowing comment from the Kansas City
Journal is significant :
The letter of Mr. W. C. Brown , vice
president of the New York Central
line , and for a number of years general
manager of the Burlington system , Is
nn able and far-seeing statement of the
very probable effects of the anti-rail
road campaign now being waged
throughout the country. It represents
the view of a man who has had the
widest possible experience In the ac
tive and practical management of rail
ways and Is not the dictated Interview
of an office magnate. It Is neither an
undignified complaint against what has
been done nor a sensational appeal for
leniency In the gnlse of sounding an
alarm regarding what may be done In
the future. It Is a dispassionate and
almost statesmanlike exposition of
what will happen , according to the
Inescapable laws of business , if the
rabid antipathy to corporations be
cause they are corporations shall be
reflected in legislation that goes be
yond what has already been enacted.
It Is not the province of this sort of
legislation to be merely punitive.
hethor the railroads have brought
bout this hostility or not does not t
ffcct their rights to demand equal and
xnct justice ns well ns their duty to
Ivo It themselves. The proper limit
f anti-corporation legislation Is In
mimon fairness the correction of ex
iting evils , not the wreaking of von-
eancc for possible Injustice In the
ast. More strictly speaking , there
tiould bo no anti-corporation leglsla-
on any more than there should be
ro-corporatlon legislation. T h c r o
hould be simply legislation that ox-
ends and guarantees right and justice
o corporation and Individual alike.
It Is this broad view , of the situation
.hlch Mr. Brown expresses In his
etter. He concedes the justice of the
. glslatlon that has been enacted up to
its point , but warns against the exhl-
Itlon of malice In future laws , for
Ital Injustice Is only malice In legal
ulsc. The Increased cost of supplies ,
10 tremendous demand for enlarge-
nent , the voluntary Increase of $75-
00,000 per year In the wages of em-
iloyes , the material curtailment of
evenues In many ways , the Increasing
Ifflculty of raising money for improve-
jients all these are facts to be taken
nto consideration and any legislation
, vhlch does not do so cannot escape
he charge of being to that extent ex
mrte and retallatlve. The whole eitua- 5
Ion Is too Impressive and too Import- - ,
int for any feeling of satisfaction at ' f |
he mere crippling of a corporation "
f
_ ecause It Is such. There Is often
more danger In momentum than In Im
pact and It Is against the danger In the
momentum which ant ! - corporation
entlment has acquired that Mr. Brown
Irects his warning.
AROUND TOWN.
How do you like to answer the tele-
hone and bear : "Hello. Who Is
his ? "
All's fair In a street carnival. It'll'
jo street fair and horse fair together
n Norfolk next summer.
Directors of the Commercial club
iliow their loyalty to the Interests of
Morfolk in no way more strikingly than
n getting down town at 8 a. m.
A Norfolk man who , hurt his foot
ind wrapped It up In white bandages ,
ays that If ho doesn't get more sym
pathy he will have to wrap It up In
ilnck bandages.
A Norfolk woman telephoned to her
uisband the other day and said ,
'Won't you come home early this even-
ng ? We're going to have Sadie's
ambs for supper. "
And now Gran'd Island Is worried
'or fear the sugar factory there will be
illsmantled and taken away. Norfolk
can be thankful for one thing , at least
we have nothing of that kind to fear.
Teachers and bankers and race hors
es they're all coming to Norfolk for
a convention soon. The teachers come
April 3 , 4 and 5 ; the bankers April 22 ; '
and the racers July 31 and August 1
and 2. i
Plalnvlew News : Norfolk Is gain- t ,
ng quite a reputation as a convention Jf' t ,
city. They treated the schoolma'ams r
so nice last year that they are going
to give her a chance to again show her
hospitality.
Panic at' Wlnslde Since witnessing
the "Dr. .Tekyll and Mr. Hyde" per
formance last week some of our brav
est ladies , those who are not even
afraid'of a mouse , dare not go down
cellar for potatoes without tnklng a
lamp , two or three members of the
family and all the cats and dogs
around the house. Wlnslde Tribune.
It looks as if the law had a grudge
against editors. First they take away
newspaper mileage , then they pass a
bill prohibiting hoboes from riding on
trains. Now how the deuce do they
expect an editor to get to the state
convention ? But the editors beat out
the law this time there's no law yet
against walking , and that's what
they're doing today , to get to the state
association meeting In Omaha.
ATCHISON GLOBE SIGHTS.
Foolish remarks always sound more
foolish when heard through a tele
phone. fL
The amusement of boys loses a U- '
great deal of Its fascination If they
have someone's permission to indulge
_
When a woman says she has made
up her mind never to marry , people
begin to wonder what they quarreled
about.
Perhaps they called them "cross ex
aminations" because the witness feels
that way when he Is undergoing the
ordeal.
When a grandmother cannot think
of any other excuse for a child's fuss
ing she Immediately recommends worm
medicine.
There Is too much attention paid to
the "influence" of women over men ,
and too little said about the fear men
have of women.
Ashes1 sprinkled on the sidewalk at
this season of the year look bettor to
the average man than a marble foun
tain In the front yard.
Nearly every mother Imagines her
daughter has musical talent , and fre
quently she makes the mistake of tryIng -
Ing to develop that talent to the neglect -
lect of plain sewing.
A woman Is traveling over the coun
try delivering a lecture entitled :
"How Wives Should Act to Keep Hus
bands After They Get Them. " Every
woman who reads this will bo Indig
nant.
