Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930, April 22, 1909, Image 6

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    IJlfoUaie. .
The smooth-tongued book agent was
selling the old fanner a huge diction
ary.
'fBut , look here , young man , " protest
ed the farmer , "there don't seem to be
any appendix in this here dictionary.
iA.ll the dictionaries I ever saw had an
appendix. " /
The wily book agent thought a mln-
< ate and then said :
"Why , my dear Ki , this is the latest
dictionary. Every late dictionary has
the appendix removed. "
And the old farmer was satisfied and
bought the big book at once.
Makes One Exception.
"You're always kicking about our hav-
too many laws. I suppose you would
i peal the law of gravitation if you could. "
"No ; that's always rigidly enforced.
Et's only the dead letter laws I'm after. "
Pnjs CUBE FBEE : Wonderful Pile
Remedy sent free to sufferers by ad
dressing Rea Company , Dept. Bu , Min
neapolis , Minn.
The gold production of the United
States , in round figures , is 2,500,008
ounces a year , and of silver GO,000,05C
ounces.
It'a Pcttlt's Eye Salvo ,
that gives instant relief to eye , irritated
from dust , heat , sun or wind. AH drug
gists or Howard Bros. . BuSklo , X. Y.
Stale.
Stubb That old Senator is always
telling ancient jokes and boasting of his
tamlly tree.
Penn n'm. I'think his family tree
tiust have been a chestnut
Mrs. Wlnslow's Soothing Syrup Tor child
ren teething , softens the gums , reduces In
flammation , allays palu. cures wind colic.
S5c e bottle.
Trouble In Placing a Monument.
It sometimes takes trouble to get the
Conds for a monument , but a good deal
more trouble has been found in get
ting a location for the bronze statue
for the late F. E. Spinner , erected by
arcmen all over the country. People
SO years old or so are familiar with
th peculiar chirography of Spinner ,
Which used to appear on all government
aotes , but not many are aware that
fte was the first man to employ women
Ca the Treasury Department during the
* rar. This was for the double purpose
* f releasing men to go to war and
providing means for widows and or-
f bans to make a living. The govern
ment -wouldn't have the statue , which
aught to have been placed conspicuous-
y in Washington. It will be erected in
Herkimer , X. Y. , the birthplace and
eesldence of the old "Watch-dog of the
treasury" who worked almost his
Vhole life for the government , and to
Whom his "home" was little more than
t name. Thus are the silent and faith
ful workers
ox i uuurance.
At the close of his speech the campaign
inder stepped down from tihe plat-
and grasped one of his hearers cor
dially by the hand.
"I don't know who you are , my friend , "
aid , "but it's evident that you take a
4t P interest in the issues of this elec
tion. I hare seen you at eveTy political
Meting Chat I "have addressed since the
Campaign opened. "
"Ye , sir , " answered the haggard citi-
n to whom he had spoken , "and I ex-
yect to hear every speech you make -till
fce campaign clones , if it kills me. I'm
< Joing it on a bet. "
"COFPEE DOESN'T HURT ME. "
Tales That Arc Told.
"Iwas one of the kind who wouldn't
believe that coffee was hurting me.1
says a N. Y. woman. "You just
couldn't convince me its use was con-
%
necled with the heart and stomach
trouble I suffered from most of the
time.
"My trouble finally got so bad I had
to live on milk and toast almost en
tirely for three or four years. Still I
the coffee and wouldn't believe It
jCould do such damage.
"What I needed was to quit coffee
nd take nourishment in such form as
xny stomach could digest.
"I had read much about Postum ,
tout never thought it would fit my case
until one day I decided to quit coffee
* nd give it a trial and make sure
About it So I got a package and care-
tfully followed the directions.
"Soon I began to get better and was
able to eat carefully selected foods
without the aid of pepsin or other di-
Cestants , and it was not long before I
| Was really a new woman physically.
"Now I am healthy and sound , can
at anything and everything that
comes along and I know this wonder
ful change is all due to my having quit
coffee and got the nourishment I need
ed through this delicious Postum.
"My wonder is why everyone don't
, ive up the old coffee and the troubles
'that go with it. and build themselves up
* as I have done , with Postum. "
Easy to prove by 10 days' trial of
"Postum in place of coffee. The reward
ils big.
"There's a Reason. "
pver read the above letter ? A
aew one appears from time to time.
jThey are genuine , true , and full of
interest.
Bine Monday.
Look a-hcre , Mary Ann ,
You stop your complainin' ;
I know it's a-rainin'
As hard as it can.
But what are y.ou gainin' ?
Is't th' Lord you are trainin' ?
Well he ain't explainin'
His reasons to Man ! _
(
Look a-here. Emmy Lou ,
I know it's Monday ,
But in sis days comes Sunday , .
So quit bein' blue !
You'd think by the whinin'
There waru't no bright linin' .
Wasn't yesterday shinin' ?
Ain't Zeb courtiu' you ?
t
Life's chock full o' Sundays
To make up for Mondays !
Emmy Lou Mary Ann ,
Tes' you smile while you can !
Jean Dwight Franklin , in Harper's.
The Unpopular Woman.
Who is she ? Why is she unpopular ?
Is she to blame , or is she the object
of a diabolical conspiracy to shut her
out from the enjoyment of a circle of
friends ?
Did you ever notice how quickly ,
easily and amusingly she tears a new
acquaintance to tatters , or with what
gusto she rolls under her tongue a
choice morsel of unpleasant gossip
about an acquaintance of longer stand
ing ? Did you mark her intuitive ap
preciation of small faults and little
vanities , and her unmistakable delight
in magnifying them or holding them
np to ridicule ?
Then you know she has not one
friend , because those who might be
friends are afraid. They see she is
sharp and cruel. They have heard her
keen satire , her sarcastic jibes.
This type of woman always gives
you the uncomfortable feeling that the
moment you leave her she Is going to
make merry at your expense. For
that reason you never quite gave her
your confidence. The longer she per
sists in her bad habit the less likely
eho Is to ever reform , and unless she
reforms she cannot expect to win
friends.
The old proverb warns us not to
speak ill of the dead. Common sense
protests against speaking ill of the
living. And herein is the true ex
planation of the unpopular woman.
Chicago Journal.
Rednclnff Your V/cifirht.
The following familiar table of
heights and weights may be lowered
with advantage fully five to ten
pounds in every instance in the
weight of women :
Height. Weight
f > feet 1 inch 120 pounds
5 feet 2 inches 120 pounds
5 feet 3 inches 133 poundb
5 feet 4 inches 130 pounds
5 feet o inches 142 pounds
5 feet G inches 14. > pounds
5 feet 7 inches 148 pounds
5 feet S inches lee pounds
5 feet 0 inches 102 pounds
5 feet 10 inches 109 pounds
5 feet -11 inches 174 pounds
G feet 0 inches 178 pounds
A woman who has lost twelve
pounds in three weeks , and lost it very
satisfactorily from her hips , declares
that the feat was accomplished by
simply dropping and picking up a
handkerchief twenty times , night and
morning. Standing in her stocking
feet and without any tight clothing
she drops the handkerchief directly in
front of her toes and stoops to pick it
up ten times with one hand and ten
times with the other , the trick , of
course , being to recover the wisp of
cambric Avlthout bending the knees.
The exercise is repeated twenty times
again at night.
Copper Colored Satin.
A stunning creation of rich .copper
Colored satin , with sleeve , yoke border
and band across front of heavy lace
dyed to match. On either side thert *
\M \ a sash of black satin , starting from
shoulder and extending to hem o ?
skirt , passing under the lace bands just
below knee depth. The tucker and
stock are finely plaited cream silk
mousseline. The turban Is baby cara
cul witfi a wreath of velvet roses tn
same shade as satin , with natural foli
age.
What Ix Tuberculosis
It Js the ever present scourge of
the human race. It is called consump
tion when the lungs are affected.
Taken in all its forms , it is the cause
of one-seventh of all deaths. The
germs of the disease are most often
carried in the sputum of a consump
tive and are usually distributed in the
form of fine dust that is blown about
by the air.
But consumption is a preventable
disease. The germs are killed by sun
light and fresh air. In damp , dark
places they will live indefinitely. People
ple who live in overcrowded and bad
ly ventilated rooms are especially li
able to to contract the disease.
To Remove Pencil Marks.
Pencil marks can sometimes be re
moved from -white paint by gently
rubbing them with bread crumbs in the
direction of their course ( not across )
or by rubbing with a slice of lemon or
raw potato. In more obstinate cases
all traces can be removed with a soft
piece of linen moistened with pure tur
pentine , or benzine , taking care to
wipe it off quickly with a dry rag af
terward. The polish can be restored
to the surface by lightly rubbing with
a soft rag dipped in a very little lin
seed oil , or by just polishing with
tion. Moreover , those thus afflicted
who persistently employ the right
method recover , unless they are in the
advanced stages of this dread disease.
A few simple exercises employed every
morning on rising before an open win
dow or In a well-ventilated room will
have a marked effect. 'Try this for a"
week at least and note the results.
nit- '
Baby's Welsh t.
A 1-year-old baby should weigh 2
pounds.
, If healthy , the gain should be just
G pounds the next year.
At 3 the weight should be 31 pounds ,
and at 4 35 pounds.
The normal baby will weigh 41
pounds at 5 , and 4. > pounds at the age
of G years.
During the next four years up to
10 the weight should be 49 % , 5
60 and GO1pounds. .
If baby has kept close to his average -
age the chances for continued good
health are bright.
Cufthion Covers.
Burlap and craftsman's canvas are
much used for cushion covers , and
really beautiful effects may be brought
out with very little effort. A design ,
conventional or otherwise , cut from
cretonne and applied with an embroi
dery stitch , will make a brave show
ing at the expense of little time or
CHARMING DINNER GOWN.
This stunning frock Is adapted from
the Directoire modes , with the hlgh-
waisted skirt of the Empire and the
fichu-like drapery of another time
charming merged into one. It is of
pale blue satin , veiled with gray chif
fon. The upper part of the bodice
and the sleeves under the chiffon are
a little whiting. If the pencil has left
indentation marks they can be got out
by laying a piece of felt that has been
wrung out of water over the place ,
then pressing a very hot iron over the
felt.
-
Home Remedies.
For soft corns , bathe the foot and
place a bit of absorbent cotton , which
has been dipped in sweet oil , between
the toes night and morning.
To remove warts apply oil of cin
namon three times daily. Five cents'
worth will be sufficient.
When a patient is suffering from
fever and the tongue becomes coated ,
wash with glycerine. One application
will make the tongue clean.
A good poultice for an abscess is to
biike or boll a white turnip , mash and
mix with two tablespoonfuls of un-
snlted lard and five drops of laudanum.
This poultice , made according to direc
tions , will break an abscess when all
other remedies fail.
Hickory Oil for Boys.
An exchange gives this as the result
of interviewing thirty business men
and thirty loafers : The thirty busi-
men had all been flogged freely by
their parents when they were boys ,
while out of the thirty loafers twentj'-
seven had been "mamma's darlings"
and the other three had been raised
by their grandmothers.
Value of Proper Breathlnjj.
It is now generally conceded that
people who breathe deeply and so use
their lungs to the fullest capacity sel
dom become the -victims of eonsuinp-
of while lace , a rufiling of which ap
pears at the elbow. The embroidery
which encircles the corsage and bor
ders the tunic-like overskirt is of pale
blue and silver. The hat for this cos
tume is of dull blue panne velvet , with
marabout to match and a pale gray
aigrette caught with a huge white
stone.
trouble. Another , cock feathers drawn
diagonally across the pillow and work
ed with mercerized thread in natural
colorings. Craftsman canvas is $1 a
yard up , fifty inches wide. Burlap is
inexpensive.
Fringed Ruching Again.
Some of us remember the fringed
silk niching which trimmed our moth
ers' gowns and mantles nearly a score
of years ago. Those ruches were made
of stiff silk , raveled out at the edges
and plaited into a full ruche. Now
the raveled ruche comes back , intro
duced by Doeuilldt , a Paris dressmak
er , and the frock on which the ruche
Is used is called appropriately a
"polonaise"
No More Children.
Dr. Walter F. Wilcox , head of the
department of statistics at Cornell
University , says that In the last fifty
years there has been a decrease of
about thirty a year in the proportion
of children to every thousand women ,
and if this rate is to continue for a
century and a half more there will be
no children left.
l Ife as a. Duty.
It would pay pleasure seekers to
try the old plan of looking on life as
a duty , where pleasures canie by acci
dent or kindness , and were heartily ,
gratefully enjoyed. It stands to rea
son that If you are deliberately ar
ranging to get pleasure , and plenty of
It , you can not enjoy it as much as
If your life consisted of duties , and
your pleasures came by the way.
Scott Introduces Bill to Prohibit
Use of Means of Communica
tion in Trading.
FLOITK PRICES AHE SOAEING- .
Many Efforts Have Been Made to
Prevent One Man Gaining
Power Over Foodstuffs.
Washington correspondence :
The entire country is aroused over
the effects of the Patten corner on the
price of brand. The White House is
being deluged with letters and tele
grams from consumers and bakers. The
individual members of the cabinet also
are receiving messages from their own
States , and in every case the demand
is made that the government should
prosecute Mr. Patten and his associates
on the ground that 'they are engaged
in a conspiracy or combination in re
straint of trade. The agitation reached
Congress Thursday , and Representative
Scott of Kansas , chairman of the
House Committee on Agriculture , in
troduced a bill forbidding the use of
all means of communication for the
transmission of information relating to
dealings in futures. By this method
Congress put the Louisiana lottery out
of business.
Grain Corner Bill Drastic.
The new Scott bill is a consolidation
of a bill introduced by Mr. Scott two
years ago , prohibiting dealings in fu
tures in grain and grain products , and
a pending bill introduced by Mr. Burle-
son of .Texas , prohibiting dealings in
cotton futures. It provides that every
telegraphic or mail purchase of grainer
or cotton shall be accompanied by affi
davit setting forth the fact that the
purchase is bonu fide , not on margin ,
and that the articles are needed for
use by the purchaser. Newspapers are
prohibited from publishing quotations
on markets permitting marginal trans
actions in farm products , and telegraph
nnd telephone companies may not
transmit such quotations.
"Putting up the price of wheat after
it has left the hands of the producer
serves no useful purpose that I can
aee , " said Mr. Scott. "If wheat and
bread v increase in price the tax is
placed on those least able to bear it.
I am personally satisfied that the panic
of 1907 could have been avoided if the
money tied up in speculative future
deals had been available for legitimate
basis. "
State Laivs Only Hope.
There is but little chance , however ,
of any action by the government to
prevent the culmination of the Patten
wheat corner or any similar specula
tive movements which may be carrie'd
on in the future. The difficulty lies
entirely in the fact that the govern
ment has no original jurisdiction in
anjr matters which concern the ordin
ary trading in a local market. There
have been bills before Congress for a
generation to prevent any dealing In
futures , and efforts have been made
from time to time to get the Federal
government to interfere by means of a
prosecution under the anti-trust law.
All of these efforts have failed in the
past , and State laws seem the only
hope.
Manipulating a price on the Board
of Trade involves interstate commerce
only incidentally. That is to say , it is
a manipulation pure and simple , and
it involves the question of local prices
much more than the moving of grain.
Besides that , the farmers are ominous
ly silent. They don't seem to object to
having the price of their wheat raised ,
and take the ground that it is merely
a development of the old law of sup
ply and demand which regulates prices
the world over. Flour prices have ad
vanced to keep pace with the rise in
wheat.
Colored Moving Pictures.
That colored photography is no longei
a dream of the future , but an accom
plished fact was proved by a remarkable
exhibition of colored moving pictures
shown to the public in London recently
by Charles Urban and Albert Smith. The
"kinemacolor" is regarded as a distine
advance over any process yet developed.
The pictures are colored entirely by
means of the sun's rays , the process be
ing as follows : A roll of films is placed
in the biograph machine and in front of
the aperture are placed two screens , or
filters , which alternate as soon as the
machine is set in motion , influencing the
pictures as they are recorded. The filters
divide all the colors of the spectrum into
two groups , one ranging through white ,
yellow , orange and scarlet to the darkest
reds , and the other through white and
yellow to green , blue , violet and indigo
to black. It is found that the red and
green tints show up rather too bright
and crude , while the blues and yellows do
not show up so well. The inventors are
at work to perfect their device so as tc
get around this difficulty.
Diamond in Crow's Nest.
A $220 stick pin was found in the nesi
of Roosey , a tame crow owneS by John
Gambin , of East Xorwalk , Conn. The
pin was missed from the room of .Tames
P. Morris , a neighbor , several daj-s before.
William Jennings was engaged to mount
to the crow's nest and there in the lining
or the bird's new spring home was the
stick pin , together with a collection of
four thimbles , innumerable needles , hat
pinp , button hpoks , hair rats and switch'
as.
Eaxy for SuerlocU.
The modern Sherlock climbed through
rhr > kitchen window.
"Ah "exclaimed Sherlock , surveying
the surroundings , "I find that bis wife
f
* ' "
"Arid'how long has she been away ?
askc'd his assistant.
Thirty days , exactly. "
world can you tell ?
"How in the
dishes and saucers.
"Bv the unwashed
There are ninety of each In all , which
shows that he has used three each day
for thirty days and left them for her
to wash when she comes home. I guess
about married mea
I know something
' . ' "
keeping 'bachelors' hall.
DON'T DESPAIR.
o a Minnesota
Read the Experience
Woman and Take Heart.
If vour back aches and you feel sick ,
lc and miserable day after
day don't worry.
Doan's Kidney Pills
have cured thousanus
of women in the same
condition.
Mrs. A. Heiman of
Still water , Minn. ,
" Doan's
says : "But for
Kidney Pills I would
not be living now.
They cured me in
1S99 and I've been
T iicjor ?
wen
. _ _
in back that once
have such pain my
I fainted. The kidney secretions were
much disordered and I was so far
thought to be at
gone that I was
Death's door. Since Doan's Kianey
Pills cured me I feel as if I had been
pulled back from the tomb. "
Sold by all dealers. 50 cents a box.
Foster-Milburn Co. , Buffalo , N. Y.
Good as Their Word.
"Did those new grocers keep their prom-
fee that they would 'cut your grocery bills
in half ? "
"Tshcy did. They send their bills twice
i month. " Chicago Tribune.
Throat Troubles Weaken the System.
A serious illness is often brought on
by a neglected sore throat.
All throat troubles invariably weak
en the system and should not he al
lowed to go unchecked.
A gargle made with twelve drops of
Sloan's Liniment in half a glass of
water will break up a sore throat.
Sloan's Liniment is an excellent rem
edy for tonsilitis , croup , asthma and
bronchitis. Applied freely to the out
side of the throat and chest rt draws
out the inflammation , reduces the swell
ing and relieves any soreness. Twelve
drops of this Liniment in half a glass
of water maUes a splendid antiseptic
gargle. * t
Mr. Albert W. Price of Fredonia ,
Kans. , writes : "We have used Sloan's " % _ _
Liniment In the family for about a
year , and find it an excellent relief for
colds and hay fever attacks. Two
drops of the Liniment in a teaspoonful -
ful of water will stop coughing and
sneezing instantly. "
Mr. L. T. Hurst of Coatesville , Ind. .
R. R. Xo. 1 , writes : "I find your Lini
ment the best remedy I have ever tried
for sore throat , either for horse or
man. I once cured a case of sore
throat on myself the second day and
almost the first night , which had con
tinued for over three weeks , under con
stant treatment of three physicians ( I
was traveling ) and it was getting
worse. '
/
Great Objector.
Street Preacher O , my friends , when
Gabriel blows his trumpet what will you
be doing ?
Voice ( from outskirts of crowd )
Waiting for Montgomery Ward to serve
an injunction on him ! Chicago Tribune.
Beware of Ointments for Catarrh
that Contain Mercury ,
us mercury will surely destroy the sense of
emell and completely derange the whole sys
tem when entering It through the mucous
surfaces. Such articles should never be
used except on prescriptions from reputable
physicians , as the damage they will do Is
ten-fold to the good you can possibly derive
from them. Hall's Catarrh Cure , manufac
tured by F. J. Cheney & Co. . Toledo , O. , con
tains no mercury , and Is taken Internally ,
acting directly upon the blood and mucous
surfaces of the system. In buying Hall's
Catarrh Cure be sure you get the genuine.
It Is taken internally and made In Toledo ,
Ohio , by F. J. Cheney & Co. Testimonials
tree.
tree.Sold
Sold by Druggists. Price , 75c. per bottle.
Take Hall's Family Pills for constipation.
The average age of persons arrested
in ISew York City during 1906 was twen
ty-three years.
Don't Congrh , but iive .
If every cough were cured before It
got a strong hold , human life would ba
lengthened by many years. If c-jpT'
coughing sufferer knew that Kemp's I
Balsam would stop the cough In a few- 8i
minutes , he would be glad to escape
the serious consequences , if any medi- f
II
cane will cure a cough , Kemp's Balsam
S o- ° ! t At druSSists' and deal r
ers ,
Quite the Contrary.
Mrs. Upsome Is denti
your t one of
the "painless" kind ?
Mrs. Oylwell Not at aJI. He's so 5 \
ympathetic that be
says it hurts him
Just as much it
as does me.
A-lcYonrDealer for AHen Foot-Ea.B Si
t '
x
' , "
i
it for you ?
Fourth Floor
eta *
CASTOR.
. .
Ste Infants and Children.
Tfie Kind You Have Always Bought
Bears the
Signature of
of&r
&r ,
t 11
, *
\ .
t- ' Hi
if ? 1