One Theory of jli.- . . < . . . .jt5 ' rafi- arc aV.i. . * r'iMO. Napoleon , noeorc'lti ; ? " : . > Amxl" : Dumr.K. Ust.u < -Ii x ' . r.s 11 . .iln \ - > bccvu.se Lo.tolc : u.h n fi. .s. ' . . . . . His generals could not rcul * bis noti-d and letters , typewriting had not been invented , and the tnjmbling marshal' , afraid of disobeying and u iving to in terpret the indecipherable commands , loitered , wandered and did not come up to the Kcratcb. or not to tLo right scratch. TL-us Waterloo was lo"t. Cun- not you fancy Grouchy hnndi ; s ri'ucfl Napoleon's note.i on thai san u. . . .ry Sunday ? "I uny. " cries the m.tra : . .l to " that word Gem- his ald e-camp , "Is bloux or Wavre ? Is this Bluchcr or Bulow ? " So probably Grouchy tosBed up for It , and the real words may have been none of these at which he offered his conjectures. Meanwhile on the h'ft and center D'Erlon and Jerome and Ney were equally puzzled and kept on sending cavalry to places where It was very uncomfortable ( though our men seldom managed to hit any of the C.-IT alters , firing too high ) and did no ho \ of good. Napoleon may never have been apprised of these circumstances. His old writing master was not on the scene of action. Nobody dared to say. "Sire , what does this figure of a cent ! ' pod mean , -md how are we to construe these two thick strokes flanked ! ; blots ? " The Imperial temper was peppery pery ; the great man would have ton" " Off his interrogator's epaulets and danced upon them. Did he not o ; oo draw his pistol to shoot a little t'.ia that barked at his horse ? And wl M the pistol missed fire the great soldi/ threw it at the dog and did not hit lm The little dog retreated with the bo ors of war. Such was the temper of Napcls : . and we know what Marlboro * : * thouIt of the value of an equab. .temper. Nobody could ask Bonap : .r 'to'write a legible hand , so his ffon r lived a life of conjpcrurp JIB to : ' ' metiuiug , and "Waterloo v * : t a . " cess , and the cir"pror ro * * Ur.tw ; ' . j Of all his sev u or eight t. Ties of I. ' . : ' failure at Waterloo , bin L'&udwvk : : was not one. Yet if tt'n explanation bad occurr.to : him Napoleon wo'M cortnlnly hcvo Warned his pens. ! : . ; and paper. Those of Nelson nt Co-- : har.en were vrry bod. "If your jjv.r.- are no better than your i is" . . 1 : Dn ! 7-b o.Tcf.ro cam ? in i I fln . of truce before UP fight r. . 'asl.cd to put a m5s : : : ; Into : : : . "you had better retire. " Andrew ! > . - . In Longman'Majraalne. . r--1 SICKRO Never conllno a patient to oce P , If you can obtain the 1:53 : of tvro. Never play the piano to a si ? ' * ? ' * if you ran play on strings or sin- ? . r. d fidr.ct T.- > . . - . - , 3 ? K g-to you. Sit dova. . Never complain that you cannot . a feeding cup if there is a tcpot tn i. had instead. Never read fast to n sick pcr - ' The way to make a story scm nJc- Is to tell it slowly. Never judge the condition of yet ; patient from his appearance ( luring conversation. See how he looks . . Lour afterward. Never put a hot water bottle next t- the skin. Its efficiency and the pa tient's safety are both enhanced by surrounding the bottle with fla : ' u l. Never allow the patient to take the temperature himself. Many patient ? are more knowing than nurses wherf there is a question of temperature. Hot Crosa Dana. In its early days , when , it Is to br hoped , It was more toothsome than It is now , the hot cross bun played POHIP part in converting the people of tl-ese Islands to Christianity. Fagan Ergltind was in the habit of eating cakes in honor of the goddess of spring , and Christian missionaries found that though they cotild alter the views of the people in reference to religion- * matters they could not Induce them to withhold from the consumption of con fectionery. So they put the sign of the cross upon the bun of the Saxon era rtnd launched it upon missionary enter prise which has" extended through the intervening centuries and survived till now. London Tit-Bits. SOUTHERN SUPERSTITIONS If you kill frogs , your cows dry/ ' dryTickltog Tickltog fl baby will cause the chlM tn Btutteri fc tfofow hair combings out of tht- bad luck. To thank a person for combing your llulr will bringbad. . luck * person wh'o touches a dead bodr be haunted by its spirit. Cut a dog's -dew claws" and It will not die from poisonous snake ? b'te. To kill a ghost It must be shit With abullet tnade of tt silver quarter dolUi To dream of a lire snake means i u- mies at larj.r ; of : i dead snake eneml-- * dead or powerless. To area in of unbroken eps i slguifl--s * . trouble to come ; if the eggs are broken , the to uble is past. If you boast of your gsod . . .hr. pound wood immediately With jour cater or you will become sick * To cut a baby's flnger nails will de * form it. If the child is a month old , It " ' will cauae It to have titd. ' To allow a child to look into a mirror / befoif it is r mouth old will catlae it to v'bave tro Lo in teething. - " A chllt' vr.Il have n r.-tui-d and diopn Kltlou ? ' : nils to thos ? of the person wbti firet tii : : * 5 It out of tiox > i-H. To iojr f r'tc : ii r.--i ida.i luc. fo prevent hwriug ltn cry tr.ra the pockets inside out and set the shoo HID BEHIND THE RULE. One of Horace Greeley' * Order * Tl iff'Tped ' HI.S Xevri Editor. As an editor Horace Greeley hn ! b < come weary of the constant rr" ' ' ' " of the word "the" in open. : g v. One issue of his paper in pnrucuhtr " asperated him. Almost every item ' . its opening paragraph begin v : "the. " This lack of judgment on ih part of his writers in the choice c words received attention. Greeley wrol a note. This notice he requostrd to 1 posted in the editorial room and < w * ' copies of it to be sent to corre.-.jji. ents. The order read : "Under no circumstances must tl word 'the * be used In the opening subsequent paragraphs of a news a ; tlcle. In sentences within a paragrap it will be tolerated if used with mo ? eration. If you cannot write a pnr ; graph without 'the' to open it , omit. " One day shortly after the issuance c his new rule Greeley entered the et itorial room in a fury- "How is it that we have nothing i today's paper regarding Holland's a titude toward the policy of the north 1 he asked of his editor who bad chary of the foreign news. This editor was aware that he l > a omitted an important news item whic at the time he considered as uniuipoi tant. But he was resourceful. "Your rules and orders are i osith < Mr. Greeley , are they not ? " aiked tli editor. "Certainly ! " shouted the fun : ; : scribbler. "Then tell me how I could have use 'The Hague' for the da.e line In th Holland dispatch without viola i in your positho order. " Mr. Greeley was iten , but he raj tered , "If you fellows could use ju. . . ment , there would be no need fc rules. " PONIES AND COBS. the Distinction * TTVO Arc A correspondent writes , so : , tl : Badminton Magazine , to ask nse wh. a "pony" is not the pony of the bo ! ting ring ; he refers to the animal. Th dictionaries which he has consulted tel him no morr than that "a pony" is ' little horse , " and he wants to kno\ where the pony ends and the hors begins. The term IB , of course , ver ; loosely used. At Newmaikcl , wh'-r one might expect accurate deflnlt.o. the trainers seem to call all sorts c , animals ponies. "I will send roun ; your pony at S o'clock , " is a fainJf ! > . phrase to me. and in two cases ' . ' always portended the arrival o : an n. . . mal of quite 14.2. I have searched f- authorities for some time past an- only accidentally came upon one u. ' other day. A pony , I find it stated , i strictly applicable to an animal undo 13 hands. Above 13 and up to 13.3 t/ creature should be known as a KM * way , and over 13.3 It becomes a horf.f This , however , is not the modern Inter pretation , though when the phrasco'o * was altered I do not know. AccouL.1. to the Hurliugham rules of polo , "th' ' height of ponies shall not exceed t- hands 2 inches , " and such an nniw.l according to ray old time authority would be quite a full sized horse. OiH cannot , of course , go against the Hur lingham nomenclature , but 1 8hoii ! be inclined to say that in general pav lance anything under 14 hands Is ; pony. I am glad my correspondent rt1 not ask for an exact definition of5 "cob , " for I could do no better tl.m suggest that a thickset pony frcm about 13.3 to 14.2 would come und i the head. The term "cobby , " at au.i rate , has a significance of its own. The Columbine. There are same good reasons adduce- : by those who favor the claims of tlr columbine ns a national flower. Th < colors of the wild varieties are red white and blue. The flower is purclj American , quite widespread , hardy graceful , beautiful. The petals ar perfect "liberty caps ; " reversed the ? are "horns of plenty. " Columbine comes from tha Latin columba , a dove the peaceful derivation of the Wore accords welJvlth our national policy the name also recalls Columbus , th great uavigtor * and discoverer. The flower alsn lends itself well to a con ventional architectural decoration. Esaa nnd Ills Copyright. Once a month it was the custom of c clergyman in a neighboring town tc catechise the Sunday school. Among the questions asked was , "Who wat Esau ? " Several responded , but none ol the answer was satisfactory , and. as _ the pastor was about to tell them , one little fellow said , "I think 1 can tell yon what he did. " "Well , " Paid the pastor , "tell me what Esau did , " "Esau was the fellow who sold hie copyright for a mess of potash. " Phil adelphia Ledger. A ! tu i-'or th * Ftitnff. "It is a source of great happiness " t : : ? . i : : - ricr.r. " remarked Mr , Baxter ' ' ' ' = ' ! Jipi:4nn. "thr.t 1.0 < - ecivt . .itlifiuncss point to y-P a wvjjan w..li a past , " Yrs. .Tain- . * . " replied Mrs , IlriX - . - . , , ; ! nifon happy , and JJH \ - . . .rth.in > it will uj. U..y ' ? to hr. .y everybody point t i T---.n v.-tb $ a present , " New ' ! ' ' ' i s tntrentnien < s Ifl Ml.i YT-"id ! : von like to live you - -.fi7 l.t : I'd like to speiid o ' , .1 ft- money I've spent. Sarny " 5. ? 4 is positively tile most ID Ir i ui I ever saw/ ' I i. v-cr knew him even to uo UJ4 STREET CRIES IN CAIRO. SoHnila anil Volc That Travelei Hear In the Egyptian City. . Take .1 chair outside .1 busy en : near the market place and tram-cent and watch street life. There are i hungry men , no starving , pinched chi ! faces , no finger worn mothers , for th Is a land of plenty , and the people wants are few and simple. Thus sui shine and laughter spray a welcoii fragrance over the novelty and r mance of the gay city's streets. Hei Is a street melodist twanging a monst < one stringed "something" and aecon panted by a nose ringed girl who tii deftly on a species of tambourin while bystanders ejaculate "Allah , a lah ! " the Arabic word f6r applaus If not quite in accord with your preji dices concerning music , well , maalais ( never mind ) , it is not nearly so di trading as a street corner athome , an they will go away if you tell them t The baboon , the donkey and boy ai In evidence , with a score of performin tricks that are very original and ce tainly funn3 % and you console yourse with the hope of a minimum of cruelt In the training. A fruit seller , basket on head , wit luscious grapes and figs , saunters b : singing In a quaint minor : "O grape O sweet grapes , that are larger tha doves' eggs and sweeter than nei cream ! O angels' food , delicious fig bursting with honey , restorers c health ! " There Is a drink seller , ber under the weight of the odd shaped jn slung over his shoulder , a lump of ic projecting from Its mouth , conjurin custom in a similar strain as he strut up and down , making the air rcsoun with the rhythmical clap clap of tw brazen saucers : " 0 refreshment of th weary ! O quencher of parched lips O blessing of heaven ! " Another street cry which may b heard in the main street of Abbassiel a suburb , contains the following entic ing announcement : "Tomorrow. 0 pe ( pie , I am going to kill a carnal ! Th doctor says , it is young and hral'hj Oh , Us flesh will bi > tender as the qr and juicy as lamb. Its price is but 1- plasters (7 ( cents ) a pound. Do you lov the sweet flesh of the camel ? The come early and be satisfied. " Not th least picturesque figures in the street are the city police , in their neat whit drill and red tarbouches In summer blue eerge in winter , FRUITS AND FLOWERS From a twenty-year-old mulberr ; tree 218 pounds of leaves have beei picked in n yar. String bf . - may be obtained duria the entire s nixncr by planting ouce ; month for si trccssive supplies. Some trers are much more unfavor 'able to thprowth of plants beneatl them than . . e othersTheworst ar the yew and the ash. Whenever water is given to po plants. enough should be used thor oughly to.wet the soil nround/the roots Mere sprinkling of the surface does lit tie good. ' Too next time you have a bouquet o flowers to krp add a very little cam phor to tht > water in the vase and PCI how'much longer its freshness will b : retaiui-d. Oil.of , the most satisfactory plant for h .use * culture is the yellow oxalis It w'.ll blossom freely if given sun am water , and its bronze brown foliagi seta off its pretty yellow bloom rarely. Peppermint For Slccplcnnucaa. A phyKici.Mi declares that he fi'ndi peppermint -rater an efficient remedy for BlerpU--sness. This ia a very slm pie cure , ai. l it will not bring fortl from the organs of professional opin ion any declaration of unsafenrss. I is added that a mixture of spirits o : chloroform and peppermint water giv en in hot water to the victim of insoto nia will produce sleep , but perhaps li the case of the admixture of chloro form water may claim a decided shan in relieving the trouble , It ia at leas eney to try peppermint water , and tin theory of It. * action is believed to b < founded on its effect in withdrawing blood from the brain by attracting r fuller flow to the stomach. He A Ucd A mlSB. - "What's the trouble , my boy ? " queriet the minister of n young member of hl flock. "You look sad , " "And 1 feel sad , " replied the yoUuj man. "I asked Mies Silvertou to be inj wife , and she declined the honor. " "That's too bad , " said the parson "But it's in accord with the Scriptures which says , 'Ye asked and received noi bf.-iuse yo asked amiss , ' " "V , > H. what would -you advise me t ( ! " qii. rird the youth. ' N'fxt time nsk a widow , " replied th < f.o d num. with a suspicious twinkle Ir bis eye. Chicago News. Imitation This Is n perfectly splendid llvel meIclnc : Take a deep breath and then o-r.p.-l the nlr from the Jungs In little puffs , like a donkey engine. Push out nil the air yon possibly can. drawinp til" abdomen in and up ns far : ts it will Sta. Tbo doing of tin * exercise will l . 'obtibly strike you as beingso per fectly funny or silly that you will wind Up \vith some of the real thing , which Is.f course , better than the imitation. Maxwell's Talisman. A. Fatal JHi. ClioJly 1 would' have bought a bos of windy tl.s : evening. Gladys , only you're troinirg for n basketball game , you" know , find ' Indignant Muldeo t'ta not doing any thing of the sort ! Cholly ( turning pale ) then I've got my girls mized ! Chicago Tribune. . . - , - ' . 'r.i it ; creum ever sold as a rcg- i ! r : : n. ; h t commerce was shipped : . ; merchant named Tudor ii ) SB tttat t A FREE game inside each package of Lion Cof f e 60 different games. Business Notices. under this beading 5 cents per lin each Insertion. Ainon reading mHtter , I0i' m per Mne each insertion.- All kinds of heavv hardware am wagon wood stock at E. Breuklanden- The Bed Front Merc. Co. carry j complete line of sporting goods. Good fresh Meat and Lard a Stetters Meat Market. 26 I am now ready to take orders fo : fine Knit Underwear for ladies am and children. MRS. ELMORE. 3 ( L.OST ! One brown yearling horse col randed , IBSj > n left hip. 12 D. STINAKD , Valentine , Nebr Genuine home made Lard at th < new Butcher Shop. 26 For all -"kinds of Undertaking Goods and Undertaking work cal on the Ked Front Merc Co. 27 ROUND THE WORLD A Wonderiiii Traus-PnciJu Jouiuej of & * x Mouths via A A II ITS t O * A ECTIO A S f lu line * with its well known policy 01 development of trans-contineutai ant trafis'-Facltic t avel r the Uuicago & JS'ofth-We'stern tiaiiway is izing a personally couducted rouuu- tne-w'o'rld tour , 10 leave Cnicago n Ocioher , 'virfitiug fclaAraii , Unina , The Straits rfettlemeuts , Ion , India and Eg pt , returning the usual European points oi interest on ttie way home. Tbe.party will be moat admirably provided for eu route Tne railway trip win - be made on luxurious last traiua tnrough the great viaaissippi Valley over "tne only double track raiiwa'y between ohica o aud tnt Miflsiasippi Kiver , " and west via Den ver and tnrough the mountain woud- erland ol Colorado , and Utah. I'nt trip across tne Paciric will be on om 01 tne magmticent new Facilic Mail Uo'o steamera. This trans-Pacific trallic has grown to sucn proportious that the service has been improved and elaborated un til in man > respects it is said to vie with'tnat iouud on the finest trans- "Atlantic greyhounds. The trans-Pacific route is the com ing highway over which American pleasure seekers will travel for rec reation and sightseeing. Hawaii , .la- pans Dhina , Australia and our own Philippine possessions are full of int erest and the number of visitors to these faraway lands increases with the increased tacilities for travel FOR SALE : A second hand spring wagon in good running order. WM. JOPLIX. Valentine , Nebr. RANCH FOR SALE. 6 quarter sections of Deeded land and some school land. Eange for 200 head of stock and is the best range now vacant. 200 tons of hay can be cut on this ranch and there is a good house , corrals , cattle sheds stable , two windmills with never failing wells and stock tanks. Al so open water on a part of the range the year round.i,000 will buy it. Call at this office or write I. M. RICE , Valentine , Nebr. Very conservative in all matters are tje Turks , and espcciajly slow to adopt h'odern improvements of any1 kind. When a man quits smoking ana goe3 to chewing he is not much of a liero. Qftftfe Meals Lunches Short Orders T HE KANGAROO First class meals at all hours , day and i'ght. Oysters in season. Pics , cakes , dough nuts always on hand. JF. P. Cohota , Prop. THE NORTH-WESTERN LINE Only Double Track Itttilrontl lifttreen Jlinnotir-l Jttlver ami Cltirayo. MMrevtlinvto St rtnil-JIimtruji- olis. Direct tine to Kluek. Uill.i. Jto e r t ttgent/or rnttm and time onrefs. The Elite Restauran and Chop House Meals at all hours. Fruits , Candies , Cigars. Good cooking and just as yoi want it. MRS , C. L , WALKER , Propi "Iflnd Thedford'n Blact-Dratight ft rood mcdicino for li cr disease. It cnrcd my on after he had epcnt $100 with doctors. Itfanllthomed- icine I take. " MRS. CAROLINE MAETI , Parkeraburg , W. Va. If your liver does not act reg ularly go to your druggist and secure a package of Thedford's Black-Draught and take a dose tonight. This great family medicine frees the constipated bowels , stirs up the torpid liver and causes a healthy secretion of bile. Thedford's Black - Draught will cleanse the bowels of im purities and strengthen the kid neys. A torpid liver invites colds , biliousness , chills and fever and-all manner of sick ness and'contagion. Weak kid neys result in Brights ! disease vrnich claims as many victims as consumption. A 25-cent package of Thedford'a Black- Draught should always be kept in the house. \ "I ned Thodford's Black- Draurht for liver Bad kidney com laints and fqund nothinsr t THEDFORD'5 Deeded in Every Home THE NEW \INTER.VAnaNAI. \ WEBSTEIVS AND E.NLAKGE.D . DICTWKARY E.DITION OF . . WEBSTER'S ; ; : IHTERHATIOHAL A Dictionary of ENGLISH Biography , Geography , Fiction , Ne\\r Plates Throughout 25,000 New Words Phrases and Definitions IVcpnretl under I ho dirt'cl. super vision of W. T. HARRIS , Ph.D. , LL.D. , Unilctl Slates Commissioner of Edu cation , assist edbyulnrgc corps of com petent specialists and editors. Rich Bindings 2364 Quarto 5000 Illustrations % -jir The International was first issued inlSSO , succeeding the "Unabridged. " The. New and Enlarged Edition , of the International teas issued in October , mo. Cfct the litest and lest. ltO publish Webster's Collegiate Dictionary - th GlossaryoCScotlisu"\VordsamlPhrases UWlI'jUrcs. UWlllnstratlong. Siw > T.xlOiS M inches ; 'Tirst-c-lnasin qtmlity , peconcl-clnss in aize. " . -pecimcn pages' , etc. of both hooks sent uu npplicjitioo. G. & C. MERRI AM CO. Publishers , Springfield. Mass. The Valentine Bottling Works puts up eleven different kinds oi drinks. 17 AVe have LOTS of Milk and Cream. Rest quality. Let us sell you some. EED GATE DAIRY. . Crnaas , Professib The L"ip Valley Ile.l r. _ . ul litre ! i of I'ovvl . r. A l \\lilnnai. . . . . UlniJstoiie pretl.KI. uatea In my lierd. No .stock fr wle nt present. Kanch lour mile ? nortli-ui : > t f HrownleeNehr. C. II. FAUUIAIKU. MILL PRICES FOR FEED. Bran , bulk 75 per cwt $14.00 ton Shorts bulk 85 per cwt | 1G.OO ton Screenings VOc " $13.00 Chop Feed 1.05 " $20.00 " Corn 95 " $18.00 " Chop corn 1.00 It 119.00 " Oats 1.20 " 123.00 " John Nicholson , Dentist. > Will be in Valentine on the 20 , 21 , 22 and 23rd of each month. Reserve your work for him. Office at Donoher House. ETTA BROWN SUPI , PUBLIC INSTRUCTION Examination Third Saturday of each month and Friday preceding. VALENTINE NEBRASKA H. DAILEY , Dentist. Office over the grocery deparment of T. C. Hornby's store. Will be in Eosebud agency July 3rd , Oct. 2nd and Jan. 1,1904. HENRY ATJGUSTON Blacksmith JBroirnlee , Jfcbr. Does general blacksmitkingathard times prices for cash. fl. M. CRAMER , City .Deliyeryman , Trunks , valises and packages hauled to aud irom the depot and all parts of the City. W. A.-KJMBELL First-class Snbp "in EVdrj * iRcspcct Eau de Quinine Hair-Tonic , Golden Star Balr Tonic , Herplclde and'CoSc's-Dondruff Cure. Try Ppmpeian Face'Massage Cream ' . . - . -r . . „ tfr LEROYrLEACH County Surveyor Valentine dr Woodlake TVOKK PHO irTLY ATTENDED TO. A. N. COMJPTON Physician and 'Surgeon Office at Quigley & Chapman's Drug Store. Nights The Don oher residence. Cherry Street. . - v ! ' JEdiuard S. Fwray Physician and Surgeon Office Fraternal Hall or El liott1 s Drug Store ; - I9un2 F. M. WALCOTT ATTORNEY A.ABSTRAGTER Talentine , Nebr , Practices In District Court .and U. 8. Land Office. Jleal Estate aud ttanch Property anlrt- . Kpjbert G. feasley , ATTOBKEY AT I/A.W. e over Red Front , . i ' f GENERAL LAW PRACTICE Valentine , Clothes Cleaning ! Dyeing and 'Pressing Hats renovated and. blocked. tS > Leave orders- Davenport fclhacber's. Ladies and 5Ii HeH Skirts. Orders tatken ior Beady-Made Tailor Skirts at reasonable prices. MBS. ELMOBE . . . If yon need a gun or feonfe am mnniCion call on tlie Bed Merc.