Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Neb.) 1900-1930, February 26, 1903, Image 6

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    Mystery
OU will always love me , Dick ? "
"Till ray death , Flossie ! "
The unpleasant memory of
those words came to Richard Filby as
be saton the cliffs a mile away from
the little village of Seaborough paint-
lug , or rather attempting to paint.
What a fool he had been ! He had
flirted disgracefully with the Innkeep
er's daughter , Flossie , who had seem
ingly taken all his attentions In earnest ,
perfectly unaware that there was an
other young woman up In London to
whom he was engaged. Last evening
they had walked out together as usual ,
wending their way along the shore ,
and there the declaration of love re
corded above had been made. How on
earth was he to get out of this im
broglio ?
After a few minutes Filby dropped
palette and brushes. Ambitious as
he was to be famous , he really could
not paint this morning. He slipped
off his camp stool , and , throwing him
self full length on the grass , gazed
up reflectively into the sky. What a
nuisance this artistic temperament
was ! He was formally betrothed to
Freda Withers at Forest Hill , and
had no desire to end the betrothal ,
and yet down here in this romantic
little * spot the temptation to enjoy
himself with Flossie Barnett , who
had attracted him the very first mo
ment that he arrived at the inn , had
proved too strong to be resisted.
"Nice day , sir ! "
Filby looked up. It was the coast
guard on his r(5und.
"Yes ! Rather warm for working ,
though , and for walking , too , I should
Imagine. "
"Oh , I don't mind that , sir. Used
to it , you see. That's a grand bit of
cliff you're painting , sir. "
"If I could only get it right it
would be. " l
The coastguard mused , his hand
stroking his chin , his eyes taking in
the points of the picture.
"Ah , I mind that spot well. There
was a suicide from there about a year
back. A chap ( he was the son of a
farmer round here ) as was gone on a
girl that he couldn't get jumped
right off there into the sea. His coat
was found on the cliff he'd taken it
off before he jumped but his body
must have been washed away by the
sea , for though we searched high and
low , we never found it. It was a sad
case. "
Directly the man had passed on
Filby began pacing up and down on
the cliff. An idea had come , the exe
cution of which might solve the diffi
culty he was in , and with free move
ment of his limbs Filby always
thought better. The notion presented
difficulties at first , but one by one he
saw his way out of them. What a
lucky thing to have had that conversa a
tion with the coastguard ! The means
of relief from all his troubles was at
hand.
That night an unusual thing oc
curred at the Seaborough inn. Un
seen by anyone , a man stole out at
midnight , holding some dark objects
under his arm , and made straight for
the edge of the cliff. Not a soul was
about ; only the distant sighing of the re
broke the stillness.
waves Hour after cc
hour passed by , yet the man did not I
return. But the wind rose , the sighpf '
Ing of the sea became a tumultuous rj
roar , and by the time the light broke a
gc
regular tempest was in progress. gcb
b
Two hours prior to that mysterious
midnight flight Flossie Barnett sat in si
her bedroom , her usually smiling face
most seriously set A letter on foreign
note paper and bearing the Cape Town
postmark was in her hands , and she
had committed the contents to memory
for about the tenth time. It was from
her soldier-lover , Jack Preston , written
a couple of days before he was to em
bark on the transport for England. In
a very short while the writer would be
here in person , with the plainly stated
object of claiming her as his bride.
No.w Flossie was in a quandary. Her
little flirtation with her visitor , Mr.
Filby , had taken a far more serious
turn than she had anticipated. She or
had merely intended to amuse herself
with him during the absence of her
real lover , and surely a girl left by
bersclf for two whole years had lib
erty to seek some mild amusement.
On a higher social level than herself ,
be had treated her as an equal , and
that had rather turned her head.
Leaving that side of the question ,
However , Flossie turned to the consideration
" *
sideration bf the more practical mat
ter what was to be done now ? Mr.
Filby must be informed , and that if
speedily , of Jack Preston's existence ,
.out how could the information be to
most delicately conveyed ? A personal is
interview would be most satisfactory ,
but Flossie shrank from cutting a poor
figure at that. What would be the
gentlest way of letting this artist lover
down ?
Ah , she had it ! Mr. Ifilby was re its
turning to town oa the raorrow. She
had his London address , and would
write there a letter , which would to
reach him soon after his arrival home ,
explaining as best she might her pre
vious commitment to another , tt was
an easy and capital solution of the dif
ficulty.
Directly she was up next morning
Flossie went out and posted her let
ter. A blustering gale was raging and
the wind lashed fiercely in her face , but
her misson was far too Important to
admit of delay. On returning to the
inn she ran m thn passage into the
arms of Bell , the barman.
"Oh , miss , I was looking for you
everywhere ! There's some one In the
parlor as wants to see you most par-
tic'lar ! "
"Who , Bell ? "
"A sailor man , I should reckon , by
his rig-out He seems most oxclted. "
Wondering who her visitor could be
at this early hour , Flossie turned the
handle of the parlor door. A man
whom she recognized as one of the local
coastguards rose and touched his fore
head.
"Beg pardon for disturbing you so
early miss , but I've some very bad
news. There's been , I'm afraid , an
other case of suicide from the Seabor
ough cliff. "
"Who ? " queried Flossie , turning pale.
"A gent as I've had one or two chats
with of late. I don't know his name ,
but he was stopping here , he told me.
One of those painter chaps. "
"Mr. Filby ? You can't mean it. You
must be mistaken. " A wild look came
into the girl's eyes.
"Don't think I am. Perhaps you rec
ognize these articles. "
Going to the back of the chair upon
which he had been sitting , the man
picked'up some objects from the
ground. They were a man's coat and
waistcoat , of a rather pronounced
check. Startled recognition stood in
Flossie's face.
"Ah , I see you know them , miss.
They're the very clothes a little
stained with paint , you see that that
artist fellow was wearing yesterday.
But that's not all. When I found
those on the cliff , I turned them over ,
and there , pinned to the inside pocket ,
was this envelope. I'm not much of a
scholar , but I think it's addressed to
you. miss. "
"Dearest Flossie , " It ran. "Forgive
me the step I have taken believe me ,
it was the only one. We loved one
another too passionately to be happy
apart for a single moment , and there
was a life between that would always
have divided us. I cannot explain ,
but , dearest , I could zierer have lived
without you , so I have chosen what
they say is the pleasantest method of
departing from existence. Treasure
he lovely time we had together. Your
broken-hearted DICK. " ,
'I should like you-to keep the one
painting I did at Seaborough as a
souvenir. "
Flossie read it through twice , and at
last the sense began to beat in upon her
brain. She had driven the man who
loved her into a watery grave.
* * * * * * *
That same afternoon Richard Filby
in the flesh arrived at his lodgings in
West Kensington. He did not look
like a man who had lately undergone
fatal experience. His cheeks were
bronzed and his step was brisk in
deed , the first remark which his land
lady made was to compliment him on
his improved appearance.
A knock at the door. The maid
entered with a letter. He looked at
the envelope and started. It bore the
Seaborough postmark. It was from
Flossie BarnetL He was thoroughly
roused now. Had his trick been discovered -
covered ?
:
Three minutes later Filby was
pacing the room , waving the letter irritably -
ritably in the air. His scheme had
gone for nothing ; all his trouble had
u
been wasted. This' chit of a girl had
la
been simply playing with his affections diet
al the time , and here was her confes dim
sion.
sion.He
He seized pen and paper. That night
the following communication was
dropped into the post : otvi
vi
"Mr. Richard Filby begs to Inform vim
Miss Flossie Barnett that he is still
pj
alive and well , and has returned to w
town. On second consideration , he did w
not think Miss Barnett worth drowning tii
for , and her letter to hand this evening tiim
confirms him in this opinion. Mr. Filby m
hopes that Miss Barnett will attain hap cc
piness in her projected union and that pi
his little picture may find a niche on tl
her walls. " tlw
But by return of post , without line tL
comment , Filby , to his great indigna Pi
tion , got his picture back , disfigured al tl
most beyond recognition. New York sa
News.
in
1/arge as Lake Erie.
tii
Lake Winnipeg , or "The Muddy
Water , " is quite a large sheet of water ,
being about 300 miles in length and
sixty in width , or about as large as
Lake Erie. One solitary schooner of L
some fifty tons burthen is all the ves u
sel that sails over its broad surface ,
we except the bark canoes of the a
voyageurs. The sail vessel belongs a
the Hudson Bay Fur Company , and F
employed in transporting furs and FP
supplies on their way to from the Hud P
son Bay , tlo cklef factory of the com s
pany. L
Little is known of the great north c
ern lake , with its solitary vessel and tl
limited business ; it is what Lake
Superior was to the world twenty-five
years ago , and it is not unreasonable S
suppose that as in the case of this
lake unknown resources and unforseen tr
circumstances will in twenty-five years
more surround its shores with civiliza
tion and cover its waters with steam a
and sail vessels. That it is a re P
gion rich in minerals there is no doubt ,
from the testimony of many travelers.
The time may come , says the Winnipeg
Globe , when Lake Superior will be tl
only the half-way place for business tlC !
and travel to the northwest. V
WANTED THE CHEST AMD GOT IT.
Trials of a Detroit Man Who ThouRht
He'd Cut His Wisdom Teeth.
"I thought I had cut my wisdom
teeth a good many years ago , " said a
I Detroiter ttie other day , "but a little
' j thing happened In Chicago the last
week to make me doubt it. In wanderIng -
Ing about I entered an auction-room on
State street , while some 'family ef
fects , ' as the auctioneer termed them ,
were being sold. There was one old
chest which caught my eye , as It ap
peared to be of ancient make , and
must have knocked about a good bit.
I looked into it to find a lot of deeds
and bonds , and my curiosity was at
once aroused. Who could tell whai
wealth that old chest might hold. If
nothing- more , there must be deeds teat
at least 1,000 acres of land in Califor
nia. I was sawing wood and saying
nothing , but expecting to bid on thai
trunk , when a man beckoned me aside
and said :
" 'I hope you won't bid against me
on that chest. The family owed me
a debt of $00 , and perhaps the con
tents will help me to get even. '
"I didn't say whether I would or
not , and he continued :
" 'If you'll stand clear and let me
bid it in I'll make you a present of
$25 in cash. '
"That was enough for me , " contin
ued the story teller with a long-drawn
sigh. "I shook the man off and start
ed the bidding at $5. He looked re
proachfully at me and went a dollar
better. We had the bidding all to our
selves and the auctioneer sized me up
as a man who never let go of a good
thing and encouraged me from time
to time. I thought I had the other fel
low downed several times , but he came
back at me , and the result was that
the chest was knocked down to me foi
$85. I hired a cab and had it driven to
my hotel with me and I lost no time in
going through it. "
"And the deeds and bonds ? " vas
asked.
"Just 10 pounds altogether , and worth
a cent a pound ! It was a 'plant , ' of
course. They were looking for a suck
er , and they found one. "
"But you you "
"Oh , you try to make out that I'm
not the biggest ass in the world , but
if you'll take the trouble to go up
to my house my wife will soon con
vince you that I lead the procession.
Eighty-five of the long green , and my
eyes were wide open all the time ! "
Detroit Free Press.
A WOMAN'S CURE FOR DIVORCE.
Advocates Tlan Which Wonld Make
Separation Matter of Choice.
Dr. Frances Dickinson , president of
* he Social Economics Club of Chicago , "
has found , or professes to have found ,
. . . a solution for the
divorce evil. It is
an interesting solu
tion , but one which
we believe few per
sons can accept.
"When people ,
marry , " says this , ,
twentieth century
sage , "they should
have two contracts
one to satisfy the
demands of the
DR. DICKINSON. it
churcjlf and tlle
ol ther a contract just among thein-
lelves. In it each should agree to re-
%
ease the other whenever called upon to
lo so. " pl
By some process of involved think-
ng Dr. Dickinson argues that such a
I
ontract would have the tendency to
ha
iiake each of the parties to the mar-
sij
contract more1 desirous
iage of retain-
sa
ug the other's affections. "There would
lil
> e < , " she adds , "less carelessness , less
tu
aking things for granted and less m-
to
Lifference in dress and manner among
CO
narried folk. "
Dr. Dickinson unmarried , and thus
Lads it as easy to solve problems for an
ither people as the beggar does to ad- th
rise the millionaire how to spend his yo
uoney or the childless person to direct tei
larents how to rear their children. She ne
vould have people enter into a contract gr
vith the church , with a mental reserva- tic
ion attached the letter of the law sh
vithout its spirit The private agree- bewl
nent , according to her , would be in wl
lertain contingencies superior to the
tublic contract the latter for show ,
he former for use. Such a scheme
vould make a hollow mockery out of
he most sacred relations of life and
ilace the married state on a level with
he : conditions which prevail among
avages. Divorce , as it is , is too easy.
Co render the married state less bind-
he state. Utica Globe. heW1
W1
The JJouis Styles. th
It was the French king , Louis XL , alSn l
ivho invented gold lace , and it was Sn
Louis XIV. who ordered all the silk th
ipholsteries of the palace done in thB
svhite with figures of gold and blue B ;
md : a touch of red. The louisine silks ail
ire : named after him , and all the 1(5' (
French kings of the name of Louis .Ta
lave had tlieir names brought down to TL
osterity through the invention of re
erne < article of dress , whether it be a vo
Louis Quiuze heel or a Louis Seize di
oat. < while to Louis Quatorze belongs al
.Ue honor of a cuff and a hat. 15k
sel
In Good Faith.
The young man kissed her and she
screamed. (
"What's the trouble. Nellie ? " de- in
nanded a stern voice from upstairs. OS ;
"I I just saw a mouse-she fibbed. Of !
Presently the young man claimed ve
mother : kiss and the scream was re pe
peated. Again came the stern voice ; ca
"What is it this time ? "
"I just saw another mouse. "
Then the old man came down with
bhe house cat , a mouse trap and a
ane and sat in a corner to watch "i
relooments. 'ye'
JEWS IN AMERICAN WARS.
llany Shininjr Instances of Their
Patriotism.
"What Have the American Jews
Done for America ? What Should
They Do ? " was the subject of an ad-
Iress by Rabbi Leon Harrison before
: he People's Synagogue In the Social
! Settlement Building on Friday evening.
He said in part : "In the war of the
revolution , though there were prob
ably not 3,000 Jews In the country , 27
Jewish officers fought for our incle
) endence. ? J.anuel Mordecal Naoh was
a staff officer oC George Washington
and gave to the government 20.000 ,
I may mention the generous servlt
of Hayne Solonmn , the friend of Mad-
son , Randolph and Robert Morris , who
loaned 8300,000 tc the government
that was never returned , and in many
other ways helped his country In dire
need. I will simply mention that in
the war of 3812 Jewish brigadier gen
erals , colonels and captains abounded
In the Mexican war the same Is true
The list of Jews distinguished in the
regular army and navy of the Unirr.
States is disproportionately large
Commodore Uriah Levy , the highes
naval ranking officer up to the civil
war , abolished corporal punishment.
I have in my hand a partial list of
8,000 Jewish Americans who fought
in the civil war , among them beinj :
sixteen Union and twenty-four Con
federate staff officers. Their record is
distinguished by eminent valor and
numerous awards of medals by Con
gress. The old warriors from the
South recall Judah P.Ben jam In , the
brilliant Secretary of State for the
Confederacy. May I mention union
many shining instances in North Carolina
lina six Jewish brothers took the field ,
in South Carolina five brothers , am1
likewise in Mississippi , four bc-ing Con
federates and one Union. There is ar
instance of fourteen Jewish families
sending fifty-three men into battle. Ir
the present regular army and navy
from Commander Marix clown , dozen-
of Jewish officers evidence that thf > 7
are descendants of the Maccabcef-
Twelve Jewish sailors went down witfc
the Maine. " St. Louis Globe-Demo
crat.
t
HOW MRS TRUMBULL HELPED ,
Her Activity Gave Her Ilusban I -
Bad Half- Hour , However.
When Mr. Trumbull was a candidate
for the office of Mayor he hul many
strange experiences , not all of them
pleasant. From his political opponents
he naturally expected some bard
knocks , but he was not prejure i for
the severe blow which his faithful and
well-meaning wife dealt him.
"I'm getting used to unpleasant h
things , " he said , one night at dinner , P'
"but I must say I've had a blow to 11
day. I really flattered myself I was 11Hi
popular in this district , even with the Hifii
ragmuffins over on Sea street. " st
"And so you are , " interrupted Mrs tl
Trumbull. tl
"No , ' - said her husband , "that bubble to
was pricked to-day. I find that the u
two posters on the old Higgins fence ?
that announce me as a candidate have
been almost torn off , evidently by
sticks and knives , and the face oc m
each poster h.is been almost obliterat lu
ed. I felt quite depressed when I sa-o fie
on my way home. " fieM
"You needn't , " said Mrs. Trumbull , Bl
with rising color , "for I did all that in
work . with my umbrella and a hat inW
. "
pin. lo
"You ! " exclaimed her husband.
"Yes , Henry Trumbull , I did it , and
should do the same thing again if 1
had the chance. There was nobody in Pibi
sight as I came by there , and when 1 bi
saw those dreadful pictures , not really tL
like you at all , and with that hideous si
turn-down collar that you never ought ll
wear , it's so unbecoming , I just all
couldn't bear it ! Pf
"I took and looked at them a minute ,
and then I went right to work. And
the next time you run for any office ,
you send the men that make the pos ai
ters to me , and I will let them have the vi
negative of one of te
your good photo tew
graphs with glasses . w
your 0.1 so the lit
scowl between your eyes doesn't P
show , and a high collar. Then they'll ac
fit to put on Higgins' fence or any hi
where else. " Youth's Companion.
i
THE ORIGINAL JOHN BULL. an
of
It is not every one who knows that
in
there really was a John Bull. This
sq ;
gentleman was a musical doctor and. sqPI (
Dine of his biogra-
hers declare , also
medical doctor ,
ie that as it may ,
e is the man who
Tote the music of
ie British nation-
anthem. "God
ave the King , "
ie words of which
ere < supplied by
on ( .Tonson. The
on
:
a
w ]
]
wi
fia
]
ias
itheni was originally sung June 26 , svill
05 ' , to commemorate the escape of
lines I. from the gunpowder plot ,
lie portrait of Dr. J < hn Bull , herewith boi
produced ] from a recently resurrected soi
lume published in 1822 , seems to in- ful
cate < that the original as in * person md
appearance not in the least degree
ce the familiar caricatures of him- he
thTh
Th
for
New Telephone Indention. icii
A French inventor has communicated del
the Academie des Sciences a proct. . . .
s ! by which , he asserts , the features usi
a person telephoning can be con- I
jyed through the instrument to the
he
jrson with whom he is in communi-
md
ition.
ire
Dangerous Shoals. sm
Tliree hundred and fifteen shoals Lo pei
irious parts of the world were de- ible.
ared dangerous to navigation last ity
sar by British admiralty surveyors.
Tomato Soup.
For this soup use one-half of a can of
Jomatoes , or one pint of fresh stewed
tomatoes. If you use the canned goods ,
ion't leave the other half In the can :
pour It In a china bowl , and if con-
penient cook It a little before you put
It away. It will keep In a cool place
two or three days. It Is said that people
ple are poisoned by using canned goods ,
only because the article is allowed to
remain In the cnn after it has ber-i
opened. But about the soup one-half
can of tomatoes , one pint of water ,
small onion chopped , a bay loaf and a
sprig of parsley boiled together for fif
teen minutes. Press through a fine col
ander , return to the kettle ami add :
teaspoonful of salt , two of sugar ninl
a shake of pepper. Rub together ou.
tablespoouful of butter and one of flour ,
and stir into the soup when it boils : sti :
until it thickens. Serve with squares
if toasted bread.
Chocolate Creams.
Dissolve two cups of fine conCectioTi
er's sugar m a half cup of water , scr
.ipon the fire , and let it boil iapdly : foi
twenty minutes. Turn out on a platter
and stir with a large .spoon till cool ,
adding at the same time n tablespoonful -
ful of vanilla extract. When w Il
creamed , butter the fingers and work
It up in small balls. Prepare half a
pound of chocolate by setting it over a
steamer till melted : then thrust a Ions
pin into the balls and dip them in the
chocolate , laying them upon buttered
paper to dry.
Uscallopctl Ejrfrs.
Six hard-boiled eggs , one-fourth pint
of cream , butter the size of an egg , a
little parsley chopped fine , one-half
tablespoon ! flour. Mix the cream , but
ter and flour and cook until thick.
Place in a buttered baking dish alter
nate layers of sliced egg and bread1 :
crumbs seasoned with salt and pepper ,
until the dish is filled , having a layer
of crumbs and bits of butter on the
top. Mix the cream and parsley to
gether and pour over the whole. Bake
in a quick oven till brown.
Cream PnfFs.
Into a pint of boiling water stir a
half-pound ; of butter. Stir until it boils ;
put ' in three-quarters of a pound of
flour , boil for a minute , turn into a deep
Uish and cool. When cold beat into it ,
first , the well-whipped yolks and the
stiffened whites of the eggs. Drop by
the spoonful upon oiled paper spread in
the bottom of a baking pan and bake
golden-brown puffs. When cold cut
slit in the side of each and fill with a
ream filling.
Cream Toast. ta
One-half cream , one-half
cup cup 3ij
milk one-half salt small
, - teaspoonful , a fr
lump of butter. Melt the butter and ta
add enough sifted flour to make it stiff.
ca
Mix the milk , cream and salt and pour lo
slowly over the butter and flour , keeping leas
as
ing the mixture smooth by stirring. So
When thickened , strain and pour over
least. Serve hot. prw
Kice C ke. Tl
Beat up- three eggs to a stiff froth , In1
put them in a double boiler , and stir ca
briskly on the stove for eight minutes , Tl '
then add slowly three ounces of fine th.
sugar and quarter of a cup of ground to
rice , also flavoring to taste. When wl
Is well mixed , pour into a buttered
St
pan and bake in a hot oven for twenty
minutes. Be
Peanut Brittle.
Boil together a cup each of molasses
and brown sugar , a tablespoonful of Tl '
vinegar and two tablespoonfuls of but als
ter. When a little dropped in cold he
water is brittle add a cup of blanched all
peanuts ; remove at once from the fire , at
idd a teaspoonful of baking soda , beat sumi
hard and pour into buttered pans. mi
"T
"Tr
Stewed Squabs.
Clean tie down the and
, legs wings in
md put a piece of bacon on the breast ta
each bird. Put a few slices of bacon
ed
the bottom of a kettle and put the edmi
quabs on them ; cover with stock and of
them stew gently until tender. Serve ta
toast , and pour the stock slightly in
hickened around them. fai
Brief Suggestions.
little salt will make a delicate , be
wholesome supper for children. ne
If mutton chops are rubbed over dis (
svith lemon juice before broiling , their 3oi
flavor will be much improved. thj
kn
Rice cooked in milk instead of water
a
a much richer flavor. It must be
nei
ivatched closely while cooking , as it
hei
burn quickly.
an
To soften hard water add a little the
jorax. Water thus softened is wholesome wl
wlit
some for cooking purposes and is use it
in laundry for whitening clothes l map
effecting a of .
saving soap. ap
A thin flexible steel knife is one of Ion
most useful of kitchen utensils. "
Cliis can be used for many purposes , "
loosening cakes from the tins , for lig
cing cakes , scraping dishes or cutting in
lelicate cakes and puddings whose 3id
ightness would be quite ruined by "
ising a heavy dull knife. the
If the paraffin paper , which comes in
packages of fancy biscuit is saved bul
used to wipe the bottom of the
rons on ironing day the effect on the P
smoothness of the irons and the tem- fer
of the maid will be quite notice- I \
. There is just a sufficient quan-
of wax in the paper ta make It a the
iplendid cleanser. Dth
GIVING HIM A SHOCK.
Old Chief Insisted that It Was
Power that Hoiatcd Him.
" 1 was a clerk in the trader's stor
it the Pawnee agency for three or
four years , " said a Detroit grocer th
Dther day , "and , of course , I had *
jood chance to study the Indian.
There was ft chief named Leaning
Tree who never smiled or laughed.
Be had no curiosity. He had no In
terest in anything belonging to the
white man not even whisky. He was
the nearest thing to a stone man you
: ould find , , and his imperturbability
vexed me. I made up my mind one
day to arouse him or perish.
"The chief used to come down to
the store every morning and sit on an
jmpty barrel on the orch. I put half
i pound of powder under that barrel and |
> ne summer's morning Leaning Trea |
took up his usual roost. I waited ji
ibout fifteen minutes and then fired
the fuse. Ten minutes later there
vas an explosion that sent the chief
twenty feet high and ten rods away ,
and of course , there was a rush from
every side to learn what had hap
pened.
"The old chap must have felt hia
hair curl and been greatly mystified ,
but he got up without the slightest loss
of dignity and when asked to explain
he struck his breast and replied :
" 'Heap lightning heap strike heap
50 up , but no heap hurt me ! Let more
thunder come. .
"His dignity was a good thing tor
me , " said the ex-trader , according ts
; he Detroit Free Press. "There was
an investigation , and they would have
made it hot for me , but when the of
ficers questioned Leaning Tree ha
proudly answered :
" 'No powder no blow up. Light
ning thunder earthquake big wind.
But was I a child to be afraid ? Bar
rel humph ! Powder humph ! ' "
YUTOMOBILE AMBULANCE
FOR CATS AND DOGS ,
The automobile has been applied to a
tvlde variety of uses since it became
popular in America , but it is believed
khat the ci.ty of Cleveland has the only
jne which is used as an animal ambu-
ance. Dr. W. H. Staniforth , of that
ity , has an infirmary for dogs and
iats and makes a specialty of their
reatment. For some time past he has
assd an auto especially designed for
taking patients to and from his hospi-
AUTO DOG AMBULANCE.
al. The rear portion Is similar in de
ign to the ordinary runabout , but the f
rent < portion has been enlarged to sus-
iln ; a platform containing a wooden
ase , which is divided into upper and
> wer sections , the upper portion being
sed for cats and the lower portion for
ogs. The sides of the case have slita
rotected by wire to admit the air ,
: hile ] each contains a dish of water ,
'he portion for the dogs is divided also
ito two sections , so that three or four
mine patients can be tak n at a time ,
'he accompanying illustration showa
le . doctor making his rounds in the au-
) mobile : , with his two pet bulldogs ,
rho usually accompany him.
HE WASN'T THE REAL THING.
ietrayed a Woeful Ignorance aa
Social Qneen.
She looked like "the real thiag. "
'he women in the corridor , who wera
Iso becomingly groomed , looked after
er enviously as she swished rhythmic-
lly past them into the reception room
t the end of the hall and the men
implemented this attention with ad-
liring nods and softly modulated
Whew-ew-ews. * '
The do2en people already gathered
the reception room reading and
liking ] were likewise visibly impress-
with the general excellence of her
tanner and appearance and every one
them would have been willing to
ike ] oath tg.t there wasn't a kink
up-to-date life that she was not
imiliar with.
By and by the charming creature
egan , to give evidence of an uneasl-
ess ; that went a little ways toward
spelling the illusion. She looked
mbtfully about as if seeking some-
ling she wanted badly , but didn't
now how to get. Presently she spied
little ] black knob far up on the wall
2ar the door and she stood up on
jr tiptoes and turned it gingerly. In
instant darkness had settled upon
ie face of the reception roo'm and all
ho sat therein.
"O-o-oh ! " squealed the women and
Chieves ! " ejaculated the men. The
othesis < of grace and culture wailed
udest of all.
"What has happened ? " she cried.
"You've turned off &Q electric
jhts ] , " said a porter who had rushed
to prevent a possible crime. "Whafc
you want ? "
"I wanted to call a bell boy , " sobbecs
apotheosis , according to the New
ark Times. "I thought that was the
itton. "
Plausible.
Pa 'Tre s ticed most children pre-
chocolate candy to any other kind ,
wonder why that Is ? "
Ma "Doubtless because it makes
eir hands and faces dirtier than any
her kind. " Philadelphia Press.