THE VALENTINE DEMOCRA1
I. fll ItCIS , J'ub Ihhcr.
VALENTINE , NEBRASKA ,
immersion is the Gcrmnn water cure
for pirate craft
Count Boni de Castellane has jusl
bought a chateau In France. The
Gould roads have been making money
lately.
It has been remarked with some de
gree of unanimity , also , that the salt
trust has gone up the river of the same
name.
Young King Alfonso wants to have
It distinctly understood that he intends
to do the cutting up for the whole
family.
The Duke of Maryborough declares
he will never set foot on American soil
again. What have we done to deserve
this kindness ?
Here's the best news of the day :
When the school bell rings in Porto
Rico 1,200 schools are filled with 50-
000 future Americans.
Whistling soloist weddings are among
the latest Eastern fads. We shall next
hear of somebody whistling "Lead
Kindly Light" at a funeral.
If the Duke of Veragua resembled
his illustrious ancestor of the period
of 1492 he would be a good man to
Bend in search of the North Pole.
England is disposed to admire Amer
ica's public school system. Every now
and then England discovers something
worthy of attention in this country.
A book lover who lent two or three
and forgot where , is advertising for
them in the papers. Never lend a
book. What are the public library and
the bookstores for ?
A girl has applied to the Circuit
Court to have her name changed.
There are lots of other girls who could
tell her a quicker and more satisfac
tory way of securing the same result.
Peary says the arctic regions would
be the best place to send consumptives.
This suggests a reason why he wished
to discover the North Pole. He may
have planned to convert it into
health resort
An Eastern scientist predicts that in
five years the air ship will take the
place of the automobile. Are we to
understand from this that in five years
the air ship will get to killing other
besides those who operate it ?
According to Rev. A. B. Simpson , the
celebrated pocket compeller , the "nov
els and books that are given to our
young people to read to-day are a scan
dal and a disgrace. They are clever ,
aye , very clever. As clever as the devil ,
in fact" This is unjust to the devil.
If that old serpent is not cleverer than
1)9 ) per cent of the books read by "our
young people , " then he is as much of
an ass as the legends make him out to
be.
Mr. Rockefeller's gift to science in
the form of an endowment of patho
logical research has already borne most
interesting fruit , if it is true , as re
ported , that investigators working un
der the endowment have discovered the
germ of cholera infantum. Anything
which should help to prevent or check
the ravages of a disease which carries
off so many thousands of children ev
ery summer would make Mr. Rocke
feller's gift one of the most valuable
the world has ever known.
"Wealthy and wonderful" is as good
nu alliterative phrase to be applied to
the West as "wild and woolly. " More
over , it has the advantage of truth.
The new civilization of the plains is
pictured by a recent incident ten miles
from a Kansas town. A farmer , riding
under an awning on a sulky plow met ,
at the end of his furrow , the rural mail
vagon. The driver tossed the farmer
t bundle of mail , and as the team took
. : p its steady course back across the
'ialf-mile field , the farmer unfolded
the daily paper , printed that morning
two hundred miles away , and read the
happenings In China and the news of
the political campaign.
Burglars should always be polite , but
some of them are carrying refinement
of manners to the point of insolence.
For example , the burglar who made a
business call at a house in Thirty-first
street , New York. For twenty minutes
he searched the house for keepsakes.
Meanwhile , outside , one man was look
ing for a policeman and another man
was waiting for the caller to come out ,
and , inside , the burglar alarm was sput
tering awajr and not alarming the bur
glar. At the end of that time he came
down the steps calmly , lighted a cigar ,
walked jauntily past the watcher and
disappeared. We should hate to be con
vinced that a gentlemanly burglar can
be ungentlemanly , but It was Insulting
to the watcher to saunter by him , and
the cigar was a detail positively arro
gant.
The masculine worm Is sometimes a
little slow In turning , but when he does
turn his revolutions are amazing. The
Pennsylvania man who objected to his
wife's written rules of conduct has
been sustained by an upright judge
not that he refused to "take a bath all
over once a week , " or "to go to church
: md Sunday school , " but because he
maintained that he was not bound to
sign an agreement pledging himself to
these and other specific articles. There-
fN'e his wife deserted him and demand
ed a regular allowance for her support
But she forgot that the applause of a
woman's club is not necessarily the
edict of a court of justice , and Mr. Sut-
ton Is now free to marry a woman who
will not present him with a written
order to "get up at 5 o'clock without
calling you. " Little by little , with the
helpful support of the judiciary , we
men are getting back to the old busi
ness basis.
That was a good word which An
thony Hope Hawkins said recently in
appreciation of the modern novel. He
characterized It as "fresh , alive , readi
ly responsive , full of healthy curiosity ,
courageous to the verge of audacity ,
greedy of every new experience. " He
further said : "Its faults are not the
vices of decadence , but defects of viril
ity and confidence. " The word of as
surance is a relief from the chorus of
wailing that comes from critics who
affect to survey the field of fiction , and
see no Thackeray , no George Eliot , a
Meredith already past 70 and a Thom
as Hardy preferring to write poor
poetry than good prose. The great
mass of fiction writers , they hold , have
little idea of good art and care less.
The immense sales of novels which
can live only a brief day show the
crudG taste of the public seeking the
popular sensation. Is the case so bad ?
Have not the popular novels their rea
son for being , and that a good one ?
"The Crisis" may not be a great work
of art , but It responds to a deep , loyal
sentiment of the American people ,
evoked anew by the Spanish war and
by comparison reviving interest in the
earlier critical period. "The Octopus"
may not be immortal. It has its
weak points , but a moral as well as
economical principle is at stake in
which the public at large Is interested.
The work of fiction which deals with
a question of this kind is sure to have
large sales and numberless readers.
The intensely practical life of to-day
must eventually find expression in a
truly artistic way , just as the passion
for beauty found artistic expression in
Greece and the passion for religious
feeling is shown in the art of the mid
dle ages. Art in any new direction is
slow in coming to perfection. Mean
while critics sigh over the past with
out looking to see prophetic glimpses
of new and perhaps better things.
' " " first
When Browning's "Paracelsus"
appeared the London Athenaeum saw
no promise of the future Browning. It
dismissed the work in three lines : "Not
without talent , but spoiled by obscu
rity , and only an imitation of Shelley. "
It is never worth while to cling too
regretfully to the past , and critics
would do better to look for signs of
promise in the mass of what they are
disposed to pronounce mere verbiage.
They may then come to Anthony
Hope's conclusion and find the faults
which they lament to be the defects of
virility and confidence and not the
vices of decadence.
The Quiet Man in the Corner.
I lingered o'er a checker game a night
The OIIP > played against me seemed
to o no ghost of show ;
I had a bunch of Insty kings that strutted
all about
And bullied my opponent's men , who
dared not A'enture out.
'Way over in a corner shrunk a timid
little man
Who staid right in his station ever since
the same began.
He watched my crowned heads marching
by with banner and with song ,
And seemed to be discouraged over stand
ing still so long.
But pretty soon an opening occurred two
blocks away ,
And not another moment did that little
felloAV stay ,
BTe bounded o'er the board and took three
kings in one fell SAVOOP ,
rhen lauded in my king-roAV with a wild ,
ecstatic whoop.
i'ou've knoAvn these quiet fellows that
just sat around and thought
A.nd never made a noise while the others
raged and fought ;
Die whole community had come to think
of them as dead ,
Or else so very near it that their hope of
fame had fled.
Ehe chaps with recognition for their por
tion pose and strut ,
seem to overlook the man who keeps
his talker shut.
But some day , when 'most every one is
looking t'other way , tc
Fhis quiet fellow sees a chance to break tI
into the play. I
Ele reaches out and grabs things that E
the others had ignored ;
3e ! puts into the life-game all the energy .
he's stored
rhrough all the years of silence. So I
you'd better not forget
still man in the corner , for he'll reach
the king-row yet !
Los Angeles Herald.
Turning the Tables.
Among the students at a Chicago
nedical college was one who frequently
rled to "play to the galleries" by twist-
ug his answers in such a way as to
aise a laugh. But one day the laugh'
vent against him , says the Chicago
lecord-Herald.
One of his hits , although not at all * *
original , was his description of a re-
narkable red bat he had seen. The class
vas much interested , but the professor
vas skeptical , and intimated that he
hould be better stisfied if he were to
ee It.
"I've brought it with me , " said the
tudent , and taking the paper off a
ackage he exhibited a brickMt
The other day he was asked about the
irlgln of cholera. o
"Asia , they say , " he answered , "but
rom my own experience I should say e
t was in the abdominal region. " fi
"I did not mean cholera Infantum , " fiP fisi
emarked the professor , blandly , and si
he joker couldn't see for some time \ titi
rhat the others were laughing at. ti
When you look at some people the
irst thing you think of Is a club. I
tSbOJlW
THE WIFE IN BUSINESS.
MAN'S wife often knows more
than he does about a great
many things , and while he need
not lower himself in her estimation by
admitting her mental superiority , it is
.sometimes well for him to silently rec
ognize her superior intelligence , and
profit by It. If he is a wise man , he
will not be too ready to come into ac
cord with the opinions of his wife , but
will affect a great deal of wisdom of
his own , even though he knows he has
none. It never increases a wife's re
spect for her husband to know that he
is her inferior in anything , and it cer
tainly does not increase her respect or
affection to have him intimate by word
or look that she does not know anything
at all. The judgment of the average
woman regarding the disbursement of
money is often better than that of the
average man , particularly when it
comes to spending money for domestic
purposes. It takes a shrewd tradesman
to get over the average sensible woman ,
while the tradesman finds it easy to
work off stale goods on the average
man ; and the most conceited man might
as well acknowledge frankly that his
wife can attend to most of the affairs
of her own household better than he
can attend to them for her. Women very
often have the most acute perception
regarding business affairs. If men
would only "talk business" with their
wives , instead of taking it for granted
that women "don't understand any
thing about business , " there would
probably be fewer failures. Many a
successful business man owes his suc
cess to the keenness of judgment of u
partner whose name does not appear
in the firm or over the shop window ,
and who is not supposed to have any
connection with the business and
that partner is his wife , In whom he is
wise enough to confide. Housewife.
Hansrinir of Pictures.
To give the walls of a room a digni
fied and restful feeling , nothing must
be placed upon them to disturb the
vertical effect A wall shoulu remain
a flat surface. The first illustration
shows a picture hung with two hooks
so that the wire forms vertical lines
that harmonize with Ilie lines of the
frame. The picture be'ing fiat against
the wall casts no unrestful shadows.
The second illustration shows a very
HOW TO HANG PICTUliCS.
common but mistaken fashion of hang
ing pictures. Here the eye is dis
tracted from the picture , which should
be the center of interest. The oblique
lines of the wire are obtrusive , and
the ugly shadow usually cast by the
sverhanging frame is still more so. In
ract , all the lines confuse the eye , so '
that a wall thus hung with pictures j '
: an never be beautiful or reasonable
Tom an artistic standpoint Good
3ousekeeping.
Tranquillity.
Who does not love a tranquil heart
L sweet-tempered , balanced life ? It
Iocs not matter whether it rains 01
ibines , or what misfortunes come to
hose possessing these blessings , for
.hey are always sweet , serene and
: alm.
That exquisite poise of character
vhich we call serenity is the last les
ion of culture , it is the flowering of
ife , the fruitage of the soul.
It Is as precious as wisdom , more
o be desired than gold yea , than
ven fine gold. How contemptible
uere money-wealth looks in compari-
on with a serene life a life which
Iwells in the ocean of truth , beneath
he waves , beyond the reach of tem-
iests , in the eternal calm !
How many people we know who
our their lives , who ruin nil that is
weet and beautiful by explosive tem-
ers , who destroy their poise of char-
cter by bad blood ! In fact , it is a
uestion whether a great majority of
eople do not ruin their lives and mar
lieir happiness by lack of self-control ,
low few people we meet in life who
re well-balanced , who have that ex-
uisite poise which is characteristic of
lie finished character ! November
uccess. o
0
The Neiv Woman. c
Oh , "New Woman ! " you who face
le twentieth centurjr with the secret ,
If-complaisaut reflection that you a
re the highest production of your sex ,
> ok back with honest impartiality to
le woman of colonial days and grow
umble. You are priding yourself not
little because you are a graduate of v
mith , of Wellesley , Vsissar , or some
ther great college , that you can stir
) ur clubs with scholarly theses or A
isy-flowing words , that you are pro-
cient in domestic science , informed
olitically , that you are traveled ; in
iort , are a brilliant , cultured , at-
active women , drilled to meet the si
ixing exigencies of modern life. Par- sia
) n me if I draw your attention to t (
le fact that all your life-equipment si
sia
iay be acquired by any woman of a :
average endowments opportunity per
mitting. Your real fiber has nevei
been put to a straining test Hav <
you the vast courage required for pio
neering ? Could you lend your fine in
stincts to the cheerful making of can
dles , cheese and medicines ? to wash
ing and carding wool , spinning , weav
Ing and knitting , to eternal mending
brewing and baking ? Could you stiiU
your yearnings to quietude while yoi' '
churned , wove clumsy carpets , and did'
a hundred other homely things ? Anc
if you bore the test , would you have' '
spirit left for dancing minuets , foi
making yourself a charming , ever
hospitable hostess , for keeping ir
touch with the greater affairs abou *
you , and finally for insuring to youi
children ( as only a mother can insure ;
the gladness of childhood , spite of
dangers , ever surrounding you ? Gooc
Housekeeping.
X j > I I r . &fu\i t
Fashions change so rapidly that tlier * ,
are few homes where the remodeling
of last season's gowns does not become
a necessity , and the question to be con
sidered is how it may be done in the
most satisfactory manner. In some
large places there are dressmakers
make a specialty of making dresses
over , and derive a good income from
it , but many women do their own sew
ing , which is a great saving , and witli
the aid of good patterns the results are
very satisfactory.
If one wishes to accomplish a greal
deal of work in a short time , it is besl
to have a small room set apart for the
sewing room. One cannot keep the
sitting room neat if such work is done
there , and this consideration , as well as
the comfort of the family , will well re
pay the expense of heating a separate
room. There should be a good machine
a cutting table , a large and well-fitted
work-basket , and a set of drawers foi1
keeping pieces of various material ?
left from dresses and other garments.
spools of silk and cotton thread , tin
finished sewing , etc. A wire skirt form
is a great convenience , enabling one to j
see at a glance whether they are even !
all around or not. A woman with : i '
room fitted Avith all the implement' 1
needed can accomplish almost twice as '
much as one whose tools are scattered , j '
When a dress is to be made over il . '
should be ripped apart , every stitcli ' :
picked out , and the cloth sponged andl
pressed before it is put together again
Black silk should be sponged thor-
mighly , then rolled smoothly on a roll j
ing pin. The economical woman buys <
Ljood material , then when it becomes ]
faded or she groAA's tired of the color ,
) ne or two packages of dye will make
t fresh and pretty again. NaA'y or in-
ligo blue , seal brown , wine color 01
jottle green are handsome , while black
s ahA-ays a safe change. The bri htei
; hades are often preferred for children
The sewing should be done as care-
: ully as if it Avere a new garment , foi :
: he little details make a great deal of
lifference in the appearance of a goAvn.
L'he safest plan for an amateur is to
rut the lining of the waist and fit it on
lie person for whom it is intended ,
> efore cutting the material. Get a good
) attern If you do not cut by a chart ,
ind follow the directions in the min-
itest details , and you can scarcely fail
o obtain satisfactory results. The
kirt is almost as important as the
'
vaist ; the top Is snug fitting , and
ild-fashioned gores are easily shaped
vitliout piecing. Two old skirts Uiay
e used for one of the new ones with
he circular flounce , by using one foi
he gores and the other for the flounce
To Clean a Sewinjr Machine.
To clean a sewing machine place il
ear the fire to get warm , that the con-
ealed oil about it may melt and then
il it thoroughly with paraffin. Work
a
: quickly for a few minutes , then wipe
ff all the paraffin and dirt , treat it to
little more clean paraffin , wipe il E (
gain , and after the application of a ;
ery little of the ordinary lubricating
il it will be ready for use. People
ften shirk the trouble of thoroughly f (
leaning their machines like this , but a
atl
clogged and "heaA-y" machine under tl
lis treatment will become like new ,
nd its easy AA-orking will be an ample S (
- trouble incurred.
iAA-ard for any sc
To Wash Stockings.
All kinds of stockings require careful
ashing. No soda should ever be used ,
ad the water should be only moderate-
warm for both washing and rinsing , tiqi
fter rinsing , which should be done qi
i water containing a few drops of IDw
ammonia dry them w
quid , quickly out
! doors in a good current of air and
ess with a warm iron when dry. Silk
ockings require several rinsings , and ti
: ter pressing ( not wringing ) the wa-
r out of them and pulling them in be
tape they should be shaken out well cl
"
id rolled In a cloth to dry. m
Heart Sonp.
Soak a pint of beans all night In the
morning put over the fire with two
quarts of cold water , a half-pound of
salt pork , cut small ; a pound of cracked
beef bones ; an onion and a stalk of cel
ery , chopped ; salt and pepper to taste.
Boll slowly for four or five hours , or
until the liquid is reduced one-half
Strain through a colander , rubbing the
peas through also. Return to the fire
stir in a tablespoouful of butter rubbec
to a paste with one of flour , and wher
the soup boils up once serve.
Devil's Cake.
Half a cup of grated chocolate , hal.
a cup of sweet milk , half a cup ol
brown sugar. Boil these ingredients
together until thick as cream and let
cool. One cup of brown sugar , half a
cup of butter , two eggs , beaten ; two-
thirds .of a cup of milk , vanilla flavor
ing. Mix well , beat in the boiled mix
ture , and two cups of flour sifted with
a heaping teaspoonful of baking pow
der. Bake in layers and when cool put
together with boiled frosting.
Boiled Stuffed Chicken.
Boil till about half cooked enough
onions to fill the chickens to be cooked ,
and drain ; mash them a little , moisten
with milk , season with salt and while
pepper and a chopped celery stalk or
two to them. Fill the chickens , truss
them , and boil till tender. Let the
water in which they boil cook away
slowly till only a half pint or so re
mains. Add to this half a pint of rich
cream , season as needed with pepper
and salt , thicken and serve.
Oranire Marmalede.
Wash , seed and slice very thin a
lozen oranges and two large lemons ,
[ f you have not a quart and a pint of
iuice add enough water to make that
luantity of liquid. Put the fruit and
iquor over the fire , cover and simmer
, * ery slowly until the peel is tender.
Vdd three pounds of sugar and boil
intil the skin looks clear and is like
elly when poured in a saucer and
: ooled.
J'asrry.
Into a pound of flour chop a half-
ound of cold , firm butter until you
lave a coarse powder. Wet with a
eacupful of iced water , work with a
poon to a paste , turn upon a floured
ioard , roll out , fold over and roll out
igain , and repeat this process three
imes. Put for two hours or longer in
he ice , then roll out and make into
lies. Have all ingredients ice cold.
California Cookie * .
One cupful of molasses , one-half cup-
ul of milk , one egg , onehalt'cupful of
Butter , one-half cupful of sugar , one
upful of chopped raisins , one-half
easpoonful each of ground cloves , cin-
amon and nutmeg , one teaspoonful of
oda. Mix in flour like soft ginger-
read and drop in spoonfuls on butter-
d tins. Bake quickly.
Fried Cod Steaks.
Trim the steaks well and flatten ; cov
r each with a coating of oil , in which
re lemon juice , a little onion juice ,
ayenne pepper and salt At least an
our the fish should stay in this dress-
ig , then lightly drained , dipped in egg ,
len in crumbs and fried. Or if it is
referred to have it broiled , drain it
'om the oil and put right on the grid-
on over a hot fire.
Utitter-cotch.
Put into a saucepan a cup of sugar ,
cup of water , two tablespoonfuls of
Inegar and a heaping tablespoonful of
utter. Boil steadily without stirring
atil a little dropped in cold water is
rittle. Remove from the fire , add a
iblespoonful of lemon juice , turn into
buttered pan and mark off into
[ uares.
Fndjjc.
Boil together a cup of milk , one ol
igor and one of grated chocolate until
little dropped in cold water hardens ,
ben remove from the fire , add a tea-
toonful of vanilla and beat until
r
eamy and granulated. Turn into a
eased pan and mark off into squares. tlh
tlP
Brief Hints. P
Never light a lamp with paper , foi tl
agments of it are sure to drop off into tla tle
e burner. e :
A little borax in the last rinsing water tln
ill make handkerchiefs easier to iron n
id look better when done.
Io imitate ground glass dissolve Ep- y
s
in salts in beer and apply it with a
ush to the glass. As it dries it crys- tiol
ol
Ilizes.
IT
Knife-cleaning may easily be per-
rmed by rubbing the knives over with
slice of and then
potato polishing II
em with brick dust IIki
SVash chamois leather in lukewarm , ki
apsuds and finally rinse in slightly
apy water of the same temperature ,
: washing leather in clear water
uses It to harden. Dry in the air and
t near a fire.
ror cleaning enameled baths , zinc
bs , etc. , use a paste made of equal
antities of shaved yellow soap , whit-
* and soda , dissolved over the fire
th the smallest quantity of water re-
ired to keep it from burning.
Boiled starch is much improved by alPC
addition of a little salt or dissolved PC
m arable. A useful thing to remem- be
: Is that the Iron will not stick to the th
thes If the starch used has been
sed with soapy water. tr
1'i
I
SOCIAL INSTINCT OF ANTS.
Insects Who Preferred Dnty to thr
Call of Pleasure.
A swarm of formica pratensis var
closely pressed in its nesl by an armj I ,
i V
of the same species , and crowds ol
alarmed defenders issued from the en
trance to the nest and flew to take
Like Satan , th <
part in the fight
tempter of old , I placed near them a
drop of honey on a piece of paper , sayi
International World.
a writer in the
At any other time the honey would
have been covered in a few instants
with ants gorging themselves , but this
time numerous working ants came
upon it , tasted it for scarcely a second
and returned to it restlessly three 01
four times. Conscientiousness , th
feeling of duty , invariably prevailed
over gonnandism , and they left the
honey to go and be killed while defend
ing the community. I am bound tc
own , however , that there are ants lest
social in whom gormandism does pre
vail.
Compared to the manner of other so
ciable animals , and especially to those
of man , the manner of ants exhibits a
profound and fundamental aggregation
of facts of convergence due to their so
cial life. Let me mention devotion , th <
instinctive sentiment of duty , slavery ,
torture , war , alliances , the raising ol
cattle , gardening , harvesting , and even
social degenerescence through the at
traction of certain harmful means oJ
enjoyment It would be ridiculous and
erroneous to see in the fulfillment oJ
this series of acts individual reason
ing , the result of calculated reflection
analogous to ours. The fact that eact
is fixed and circumscribed within one
species , as well as the fatalistic char
acter it has in that species , proves this
superabundantly. But it would be as
grave a mistake to refuse to recognize
the deep natural laws that are conceal
ed under this convergence. Is the case
different as regards our actions , though
they are infinitely more plastic and
more complex individually ? I do no1
believe it
I have been unable to give more than
a short sketch of the social life of ants
Let each one study it for himself and
lie will experience in doing so the deej
enjoyment that comes from sounding
the secrets and laws of nature , while
it the same time he will enjoy the most
lelightful satire upon human wretched-
ness , and will perceive at least the
main lines of a social example that we
night to be able to imitate , though we
: annot do so on account of the too large
lose of egotistical and ferocious in
stincts that we have inherited from oui
incestors.
DOCTOR WAS TOO CLEVER.
* u anonymous physician who has
vritten some "confessions" for the In-
lependcnt tells this story about him-
; elf : "I received a request to call
rom an old patient who was afraid sh
vas taking scarlet fever. I responded
it once. The patient was one of twc
Iderly sisters whom I had attended foi
tiany years. I greeted her in the sit
tig room and noted her pulse while ir
he act of shaking hands with her. Bj
ome witty remarks I contrived t <
nake her laugh , which enabled me tc
ee her tongue. Then I said in a play
ul tone : 'If you will get me a glass 1
rill treat you to-some of my patent
oda water. ' She did so. I put a tab-
it in the water , and she drank it 1
, 'ant you to know that I take pride in
ly original methods. I try to educate
ly patients to like , and not to dread
tie visits of the doctor. In this cast
11 of my work had been done without
lie direct knowledge of the patient
nd I felt very good over it. So I badt
ly patient good-by with extrerm
lieerfulness. She looked surprised anc
icn said : 'Of course , you Avill conn
pstairs and see my sister ? ' 'Not to
ay , ' I said. 'Give her my respects.
, Vhy , ' she said , looking mystified anc
tartled , 'how strangely you talk !
strangely ? ' I echoed. 'Why ? ' 'Be
luse I sent for you to prescribe foi
iy sister and you decline to see her.
: flashed over my mind in an instant
had prescribed for the wrong sister
was entirely too clever. "
"Humorous Yankee Thief. "
An American thief named Arthu.
obinson has set Paris laughing by hij
tpartee Avhen arraigned for trial. Al
ie papers publisb pictures of "tin
imorous Yankee. " Robinson
ap
; ared in the criminal court and askec
, at the trial be postponed because hi <
torney was ill and
unable to be pres
tt The judge said he couldn't gram
e request because two postpone
ents had already been *
alloA\ed
lave you confessed repeatedly thai
m were sentenced in the Unitec
ates for petit larceny ; that you stol < A
is man's pocketbook and struck th ( \
Seer Avbo arrested you ? " queried thi
figistrate.
'Yes , your Honor , " Robinson replied
'Then what could
your
lawyers sai
your defense ? " demanded the court
'That's just what '
I'm
curious t <
low , " the Yankee said , grinning. H
't ' six months in jail.
Plainly Stated.
Mr. Yerning-If you will only mar
me , I promise you I'll make you t
od husband.
Miss De Termind Never fear
! If j
cide to marry you I'll make you that
Philadelphia Press.
Ironze Beard"
Probably
a Fiction
Che first fourteen Roman
emperon
shaved their faces clean. There is j
rtralt bust representing
Nero
with J
ard , but It Is not believed to be an
sntic.
L little learning often
saves a mai
> m Jury doty.
