i
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II
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T
THE CONSUMER PAYS
Pass it on to the consumer That is
the rule with reference to tariff taxes
It is the rule also as far as this can be
made so with reference to extraordin
ary taxes imposed for the purpose of
the war Somebody else must pay It
is required in the law that not only car
riers shall stamp a bill of lading but
that they shall see that it is stamped
and canceled Shippers expected for a
time that railroads would take the bur
den on themselves but they do not pro
pose to do so They prefer to have the
shipper pay Some compromise may re
sult but the prospect is in this case
as in all cases that the burden will be
placed on the shoulders of the ultimate
person Congress requires that sugar
and oil refiners doing a business of over
3250CC0 shall be taxed annually of
1 per centum on the gross amount on all
receipts in excess of 20000 but these
companies will not pay the tax except
In a formal way They will as they
an readily do increase the price of
their products The consumer must
pay So as to the beer tax The brew
er must settle with the Government
but he has raised the price of beer to
the retailer who will probably not
raise the price to the consumer but
will save himself by giving the cus
tomer more froth and less substance
Compmies having parlor cars or sleep
ers are required to pay a cent on each
seat or berth sold and themselves affix
to the ticket the stamp representing
the payment of the tax It will be diffi
cult for these companies to pass on tihis
tax inasmuch as their charge is now
large and they cannot very well in
crease certainly they cannot do so
without the liveliest sort of protest
upon the part of the traveling public
but to the inculcation of State legisla
tion limiting their charge For the
rest it will he the old story the con
sumer will pay
Pacific Railway Commission
An exceedingly objectionable meas
ure is that which proposes to take the
settlement of the Pacific Railroad debt
to the Government out of Congress and
to place it in th hands of an adminis
tration committee The measure in
question proposes to make the Secre
tary of the Treasury the Secretary of
the Interior and the Attorney General
a commission with power to settle the
indebtedness of the Government grow
ing out of ih issue of bonds in aid of
the construction of the Central and
WeWv rn Pacific Railroads
Representative Mnguire of Califor
nia in an interview had at Washing
ton says My objection to this meas
ure is that no limit is made to their
power exciit as to a quesiion of time
and interest
It cvnres an patindy new relation
ship Ihwiv Government and the
company c J srltuting an innovation
or new cont - bidoning th right
of the Gov riVt to pursae the di
verted a--- vi the company which
the Kilway Commission found
tohi onoai d to more than 70CO0
K with a reasonable probability rhat
they amounted to a much larger sum
It provides for a special assessment of
claims of Lhe Government with its rich
and power debtors of he Govern
mcr Ir v pt rs a period of lobbying
and manipulation on the part of the
company to secure terms from the next
Congress or a future one similar to
those- whii h it and the other railroad
companies have been seeking for the
last five years
It is objectionable from almost ev
ery point of view All that can be said
in favor of it is that it is nor nearly so
liad as those which were beaten in the
last two Congresses But it is bad
enough and its passage gives no guar
anty either thn its terms will be car
ried out or hn during the pericl of
suspension th 1 Governments rights
against cue company which it involves
It may not be used to secure a further
extension ard waiver of the Govern
ments riirhis
Victories for Silver
With lapau heartily sick of the gold
standard and with the English gold
raonometallists urging the opening of
the India mints to the free coinage of
silver the foreign outlook for the silver
cause is cheering But certain trausac
tions at home are worthy of considera
tion In the first place the authoriza
tion of 400000000 of Government
bonds contains no taint of gold legisla
tion The bonds are coin bonds in
spite of the desperate attempts of the
reformers who strove to place this
country more firmly on the gold basis
shortly after the inauguration of Mc
Ivinley But in addition to this import
ant fact it must be noted that the bill
for the seigniorage was passed by both
houses of Congress and that gold advo
cates were forced to vote for the meas
ure When it is remembered that the
monetary reformers are the authors
of the statement that to coin the seign
iorage was to coin a vacuum the ex
tent of the silver victory may be more
readily estimated Now the administra
tion organs are satisfied to let the money
question in Congress go over until the
next session And when that session
meets they may be still more anxious
to postpone the day of discussion The
fact is the people of the United States
are becoming more enlightened on this
important question and the Republi
cans see defeat in further advocacy of
gold monometallism on their part
Cleveland Not Approved
Opposition to the annexation of Ha
waii on the part of the Democratic
A
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Congressmen has been characterized as
approval of Grover Clevelands policy
This is a mistaken view of the situa
tion and is put forward bj the annexa
tion advocates merely for the purpose
of darkening counsel Clevelands pur
pose was to re establish the monarchy
in Hawaii while those Democrats who
now oppose annexation hold no such
theory As the Atlanta Constitution
says To oppose anexation is one
thing there are good arguments on
both sides but to attempt to restore a
monarchy which has been overthrown
is another thing Mr Cleveland we
believe is the first American official
who ever attempted such a game as
that All our Presidents have been im
pressed by the fact that the Govern
ment is pledged by its history and its
character to sympathize with if not
support the efforts of the people every
where who desire to govern themselves
Properly understood the American re
public is a menace to monarchial in
stitutions everywhere Democrats in
Congress have sins enough of their own
to answer for without being responsible
for those of the late President Grover
Cleveland Exchange
No Politics in This
In favoring the building of the Nic
araguan Canal this paper wants no con
struction company granted a concession
to do the work When the task is un
dertaken it must be by the Govern
ment and when the task is finished it
must belong to the Government It
should be a great national work cm
ploying thousands of American citizens
in its constructions and belonging to
the United States when it is done
There should be no politics in discus
sing or in forwarding the Nicaraguan
Canal project It is a national enter
prise Republican Populist Democrat
all sorts and all shades of politcinns
should favor this work The nation
needs it The nation ought to construct
it and once it is constructed it should
belong to the nation Democrats of
Arkansas and Indiana have approved
the canal project by resolution adopted
at their State convention Republicans
of Ohio have done the same thing But
let the work be done directly by the
Government Let no corporation in
tervene between the Government and
the people in the labor of construction
Then there will be a unity of purpose
and a national triumph worthy of this
nation and of its citizens Chicago Dis
patch
Rich Men in War Timoi
The rich American has never failed
with purse or sword in any of his coun
trys perilous periods His temptations
come not in time of war but in peace
time inclination to be an ostentatious
spendthrift a mere pleasuri hunter or
on the orln r hand a misi r a mun y
grabber or a coid eyed conservative
blocking the way opposing improA i
irerts waiting for the labor and enter
prise of others to make him rich But
this disposition overcomes him in time
of peace and not infrequently N meted
and fused in time of war Kansas City
Star
Just Like
No combination of capital however
vast engineered by abilities howevei
great has ever been able to
ly carry through a corner of the wheat
market except for a very short period
on a line of prices beyond thtiir natu
ral level Every attempt cf the kind
however apparently successful for a
time has ended disastrously for these
concerned in it That the Leiter disas
ter will have any more effect than its
long line of predecessors in deterring
others from following his example ma
well be doubted
CbnMTicv the Wenthercvk
When he was in Paris our own and
only Channeey Depew told the Paris
ians the talk about an Anglo America ti
aliance was all moonshine and that The
only country which America really
loved is France In London the peach
is advocating an alliance between the
two great English speaking nations All
of which shows that Dr Depew lias re-
termined to he agieable und r any and
all circumstances St Louis Republic
Trust nle in New Jersv
New Jersey is ruled by the corpora
tions True to their history the courts
there have held that the American To
bacco Company may sell its goods to
whom it pleases the same as an indi
vidual without violating the anti trust
law It is well known that the Tobacco
Company preserves its monopoly by re
fusing to sell goods to retaiers who buy
of other manufacturers Buffalo Cou
rier
Effect of the Tariff
It is coming to be understood better
each year that Americans are more ir
danger of losing foreign markets by
restricted tariff policy than that they
are saving their own from competition
Instances are thickening all the time in
proof that the world is moving just ir
this way Boston Herald
Dangerous
Perry Tatettic 1 wonder how one of
them fellers that has a steady job am
works every day feels
Wayworn Watson You better not let
your thinker run on them ideas First
thing you know you may go wrong
Cincinnati Enquirer
its an 111 Wind
They can say what they please about
the horrors of war said Sprocketts
but afte all it has its bright side
Hows that asked Wheeler
McWatters the sprinkling cart
driver has enlisted
iO
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STATE OF NEBRASKA
NEWS OF THE WEEK FN A CON
DENSED FORM
Recently Promoted Men to Be Ex
amined as to Their Fitness to Hold
Commissions in the Nebraska Na
tional Guard Other Items
Examination for Officers
An order has been issued from Adjutant
General Barrys office at Lincoln directing
that under the requirements of the mili
tary code of the state a board of examina
tion shall convene at the armory of the
Wymore battery for the purpose of exam
ining such per ons as may be ordered be
fore it as to their fitness to hold
ions in the Nebraska National Guard
The members of i he board designated are
Captain J M Murdock and First Lieu
tenant William McKinncy both of battery
A The order further directs First Lieu
tenant A A Munlofk Second Lieutenant
S E Yoiler ot the battery to appear be
fore the board of examination The officers
to be examined have recently been pro
moted
RIGHT TO REGULATE EXISTS
Judge Cornish Decides Against Tele
graph and Express Companies
Judge Cornish of the district court at
Lincoln lias handed down a decision in
the telegraph and express case holding
that the law giving the state board of
transportation power to regulate the
charges of these companies is valid The
case came into the district court several
mouths ago on the application of the com
panies for an order restraining the board
Irom enforcing lower rates Judge Cor
nish in his decision goes into the history
of the case and into the principal featuies
of the new law The opinion concludes
with the following The questions in
volved are not free from doubt The law
is as has been stated by the supreme court
that legislative enactments ought not to
beheld unconstitutional unless they aie
clearly so The legislation under consid
eration was passed by the legislature un
der a subject that lias been agitated in
this state more or less for some time
Rightly or wrongly the public mind as
expressed in this enactment has readied
a conclusion that corporations of this na
Ime are pioperly under state control that
ordinary competition and business methods
are not effective to prevent at times arbi
trary action on their pare and grievances
against which the people may justly com
plain The necessity for it may be re
gretted but the legal right of the people
acting through their representatives is
well settled
Cost of Free Text Books
Superintendent of Public Instruction
Jackson recently received from the super
intendent of the slate of Michigan a re
quest for figures showing the cost of books
for the state under the free text book law
In accoi dance with this request the fol
lowing interesting table of figures haa
been compiled
18Jfi
Number pupils enrolled 272310
Text books total cost 12154143
Cost per pupil 45
1895
Number of pupils enrolled 274282
Text books total cost 168tit909
Cost per pupil 151
1894
Number pupils enrolled 273C52
Text books total cost 14883fi 0
Cost per pupil 54
83
Number pupils enrolled 251517
Text books total cost 14817500
Cost per pupil 5fi
Ctionls Filled with Shot
The 4-year-old son of Frank Hushnell
of Columbus was buried Friday and Sat
urday Hushnell was informed that the
grave would be robbed Hushnell and son
went to the cemetery and watched About
11 oclock a light spring wagon drove up
and they identified the driver as an old
man who lives in Columbus He said he
had come to cut some grass for feed and
was allowed to go on About half an
hour later forms were seen in the cemetery
making direct for the new grave Hush
nell was unable to restrain himself and
lei go with two big loads of buckshot
The ghouls tied pell mell out of the cem
etery Had Hushnell been more cautious
and got some help the whole outfit might
have been bagged The child died with
spinal meningitis This is the fourth
time within two years that graves have
been tampered with at this point
Shot from Ambush
Frank ONeil son of J H ONeil of
Gordon was shot about sunrise one morn
ing last week by some person in ambush
with a shot gun loaded with pounded glass
and ciockery His right shoulder and
right hand were badly shattered and
pieces of glass were imbedded in many
places in his body He was evidently
jJiot at close range as his face is badly
powder burned He claims to have seen
and recognized his assailant as one Louie
Eddy a neighbor with whom the ONeils
are not on friendly terms Eddy has Lecu
arrested charged wish the shooting
New Omaha Scandal
Comptroller West berg of Omaha has anJJ
nnum ed a sensational discovery In a
cosimunicatioa lift sets out that during the
years 1803 and 1894 thousands of dollars of
taxes were marked paid on the books and
not a cent of the money turned into the
city treasury An investigation has boon
ordered by the council Wcsthcrg says
he has recognized the handwriting of the
clerk who made the entries The work
was done during the administration of
Henry Holln as ciy treasurer Hollu is
now serving a nineteen year sentence for
embezzlement
Celebrate Schleys Victor-
The people of Fremont had an enthusi
astic demonstration in honor of Commo
dore Schleys victory at Santiago A
salute of forty five guns was fired and a
procession of citizens headed by the nor
mal school band and a drum corps paraded
the streets Across the street were sus
pended two large new American and one
Cuban flag
Kicked by a Horse
Dr John H MeConnell of Falls City
was found in a barn in that city the other
day in an unconscious condition Upon
examination it was found that two of his
ribs had been broken He entered the
barn some time during ihe night before
ind was kicked by a horse
David City School Census
The completed school census of the
school district of David City gives 709 as
itho u umber of pupils in the district a
gain of twenty eight from last years
number
k i - - f t r
Fatally Shot by His Wife
George Blackwell a hostler in the em
ploy of Dr Gilmore at Omaha has a bul
let wound through his right lung indicted
by his wife Lottie Blackwell and his
wife had a quarrel over a picnic the former
attended at a suburban grove and Black
well struck his wife after which he left
the house Two hours later he returned
and the quarrel was resumed At the
time of the shooting Blackwell so the
woman says had her prostrate on a bed
and was choking her She reached under
a pillow where she kept a revolver and
placing it against his heart fired After
the shot Blackwell ran from the room but
relumed in a few moments and dropped
onto the bed unconscious At the hospital
Blackwell said he did not want the woman
prosecuted as the shooting was all hi7
fault
Shooting Affray at Tcoumseh
Mrs Zoe Knight caused another shoot
ing affray at Tecumseh July 3 and the vic
tim of it will die Zoe has recently turned
her affections to V E Worthen a horse
trainer and Worthen has reciprocated to
the extent that he left his wife and child
ren The pair have been out of town to
gether a number of days and when they
returned Knight the womans husband
stiot him with a shot gun over sixty buck
shot entering his left side Worthen
dodged behind a tree to prevent being giv
en a second charge Knight then gave his
attention to the woman and threatened her
life She delied him and his courage
failed The woman then administered to
the wants of Worthen while Knight took
tiight Knight was caught by the sheriff
and a posse when about eight miles from
town
Raids a Hole-in-the- Wall
Osceola citizens are on the alert and are
thoroughly organized to rid the town of
the bums bootleggers and streetwalkers
that have been infesting it lately At the
spring election the city voted no license
and it was thought that the liquor ques
tion was pretty well under control but on
the Fourth of July the sheriff and a posse
pounced down on a hole-in-the-wall
where they found a gang congregated The
sheriff seized two crates of beer and tookC
A Badgely who seemed to be the one
who ran the establishment Mr Badgely
pleaded guilty and the judge gave him the
lightest sentence he could 100 and costs
Mr Badgely had no money and Osceolas
jail has one prisoner who will board until
the whole line and costs are paid
Liquor Question at Humboldt
The question of the illegal traffic of
liquors in Humboldt has taken on a new
phase Deputy United States Marshal A
J Keini of Beatrice went to the former
city and took away with him Harry
Perkins colored who was a short time
ago convicted in police court of disposing
of liquor without a license and took him
to Beatrice to answer to the United States
commissioner on a like charge The
officer also made a thorough search
through the drug store of Wiesner Son
but failed to find any evidence of illegal
sale of liquor -
Street Cars fop Havelock
The council of the village of HavelocK
has called a special election to decide upou
the p opositiotMf the Lincoln Street Car
Company io extend Its Tines lo that place
The franchise if granted will provide for
a 10 cent faro between Lincoln ana Have
lock for a period not to exceed ten years
after which time a lower rate is to be made
It will also provide that the work on the
new line be commenced before October 1
and bu finished before April 1
Pioneer Passes Away
Stewart MeConiga one of the oldest
settlers of the state and the first register of
the land office when the state capital was
located at Huieoln died at his home in that
city aged 71 years Mr MeConiga was
bom in West Virginia his parents hav
ing been emigrants fiom Scotland He
came to Nemaha Oouuly in 1851 md
located in Lincoln when the laud office
was uatabl shed there
Young Man Inwned
Walter Fawkes a young man 17 yoirs
of age whose parents reside about four
miles northeast of ONeill was diouind
in the Elkhoru July 4 Deceased could
not swim and got into the water over his
depth The body was found about an
hour after he went under in ten fcef of
water
Creamery for Duncan
Duncan is to have a creamery ttie
first meeting looking to a location was
held July 9 A voie of the stockholders
resulted in forty votes for Duncan nd
thirty for another point All the shares
are sold and a 4000 plant will be put in
at once
Farmer Badly Disabled
O A Cooper while assisting iu looking
after the stowing away of his mammoth
hay erop near Humboldt was struck on
the right hand by a hay fork and badly
disabled
Hartley in the Pen
Ex State Treasurer J S Bartley hs
been turned over to Ihe warden of the pen
itentiary at Lincoln
Nebraska Short Notes
Aurora is figuring on putting in an elec
tric light plant
Work has been commenced on the To
bias telephone system
Young grasshoppers in large numbers
have appeared in Dawes County
Lightning killed twenty steers on the
Stewart ranch inrLogau County
Applications for 7500 wortji of the new
government bonds have been made by resi
dents of Ho tkins
Tim Folev aged 28 years was drowned
at North Bend while in bathing in the
Platte River It is presumed he broke bis
neek while diving in -hallow water The
body was recovered
The sixteen sections of land comprising
the larger xhare of the old Fort McPher
son reservation were opened for entry at
Xorth Platte Monday morning By noon
iluce fourths of the land was taken
Bishop Scannell of Omaha lias notified
the trustees of the llavenna Catholic
Church that when they have raised the sum
of 31400 and invested that sum iu a site
able residence property for a priest he will
see to it that a resident priest is sent
there
There is talk of starting a second bank
at Creston
J M Snyder and wife of Loup City cel
ebrated the fiftieth anniversary of their
marriage July j and four generations
were present The remarkable feature
was that not one of the families in these
four generations hadsuffered a siugle less
by death
There are some pretty big grain fields in
the vicinity of Gothenburg W F Black
has in 930 acrs of small grain H L Wil
liams 700 acres J W Hiiest one seetion
white J00 more farmers adjacent to the
city have from 100 acres to 820 in small
grain which promises an immense yield
JHOpdif
They were talking of the civil war
and the older members of the company
had compared reminiscences Which
side were you on during the war Mrs
BV asked the kittenish young girl of
the party turning to a pretty little
woman who had been born In 02 I
was in arms on the Southern side
was the quick reply
Sir John Sinclair once asked Coch
rane Johnstone whether he meant to
have a son of his then a little boy
taught Latin No said Mr John
stone but I meail to do something a
great deal better for him What is
that said Sir John Why said the
other teach him to shave with cold
water and without a glass
When after a few months in Wash
ington a new Senator decided to take
a little run home just to see the folks
he went back minus about twenty
pounds of flesh Why Senator said
one ardent constituent you have been
losing flesh What can have happen-
cycle No hang it replied the Sen
ator it was dodgin em that did it
This story was told by an intimate
of the Ingersoll family Very recently
Mrs Ingersoll spent an evening with
a friend At about S p m she began
to give evidences of fatigue and yawn
ed repeatedly and had the greatest dif
ficulty in preventing herself from fall
ing into a doze Arousing herself with
an effort she finally said You really
must excuse me but you know dear
that I have accompanied the colonel
on a recent lecture tour and have in
consequence got into the habit of fall
ing asleep at about S oclock every
evening Which goes to show that no
man can be an oratorical hero to his
wife
During a trip through Ireland a New
Yorker one day found himself without
his razors which were in a handbag
he had left behind at the hotel where
he had stopped the day before He ac
cordingly told the landlord to send him
a barber The landlord was doubtful
if there was a man in the village who
could serve him but presently sent up
a man who expressed his willingness
to undertake the job The New Yorker
decided to risk a gash or two Well
sir said the amateur barber after a
little hesitation will you please to lie
flown flat onyour back while I shave
you sir Thinking it was probably
the custom of the country the New
Yorker stretched out comfortably and
nearly went asleep while the fellow
shaved him so light was his touch
When he had finished thoXew YorkerJ i
rose and said l am curious to Know
why you asked me to lie down to be
shaved Because sir was his in
genuous reply fliever before shaved
a live man sir
It is often said that Frenchmen lack
humor and dread ridicule but M Fran
cisque Sarcey has given an example of
that humorous good sense which defies
mockery At carnival time in Paris it
i3 customary to exhibit on the boule
vards grotesque effigies of well known
public men A modest stranger called
on M Sarcey to tell him that his image
was to figure in the procession Yery
good said Mr Sarcey What can I
do for you Well if you would be
so kind as lend us some of your verit
able garments they would make the
likeness all the stronger No doubt
responded the critic blandly In that
cupboard you will find several hats
Oh the veritable hat will not do You
see your head I mean the head of the
elligy is enormous Tres bien Take
a coat then Dressed In the veritable
coat the Sarcey dummy was an im
mense success It seemed so strange
to literary Paris however for a man to
aid and abet the caricature of himself
that M Sarcey has volunteered an ex
planation which is a delicious bit of
humor Lamartine he remarks
would not have consented to lend his
2oat for such a purpose He was a
poet with a sensitive soul So was Vic
tor Hugo But what would you We
cannot all be Lamartines and Hugos
Why should we poor journalists who
have no feelings to speak of deny our
selves to the populace when we can
2ontrIbute to their harmless amuse
ment Besides they may not always
think it worth their while to notice us
An agreeabde trifler came to me the
5ther day and asked my permission for
lhe use of my name in a burlesque I
gave it cheerfully This may be the
last time said he What do you
mean I asked Well you are going
out of date and next year you may not
be worth a laugh
A Story About Nelson
A pretty little romance gives Nelsons
memory a sentimental interest in Can
ada During his service at Quebec in
17S2 when he was but 24 years of age
he became infatuated with a beautiful
Canadian girl Mary Simpson daugh
ter of a great Canadian merchant of
the period At the time of Nelsons
visit she was but 1G years old mar
velously beautiful and witty On Oct
14 17S2 Lord Nelsons ship the Al
bemarle was ready to sail and he had
a very sad and tender parting with
Mary Simpson and went down the St
Lawrence to board the man-of-war
The next morning arrived and the Al
bemarle did not heave anchor and Cap
tain Nelson was seen coming back to
Quebec in a boat A friend of Nelsons
a man prominent in Quebec at the time
espied him and asked him what had
happened Nelson is quoted as having
said I find it absolutely impossible
to leave this place without again wait
ing upon her whose society has so
much added to its charms and laying
myself and my fortune as her feeV
y
Nelsons friend protested against such
a rash act and told him that situated
as you are at present your titter ruin
will inevitably follow Then let It
follow replied Nelson earnestly for
I am resolved to do it But despltel
his intentions the stronger will of lite
friend prevailed and he was fairly car
ried back to his ship and forced to leaver
behind the girl he loved and It wan
many years before he gave up the hop
of possessing her for Nelson never re
turued to Canada and Mary Simpson
died in spiusterhood Leslies Weekly
THOUGHT IT WAS A SPOOK
Pilot on a Kiver Boat Stnna a Ilorso
vitll a HFesrnphoue
I was on the npier Ohi ths summer
when the river was low and wu much
amused over the use to which i pilot
put a megaphone He bought the thing
to call ashore any message that might
have been given the boat to cary hij
j was to save time for those little boat-
in the local trades are a great deal like
the old fashioned mail carriers any
thing to accommodate the peopl along
the bank
We were In the pilot house and th
boat was running up a chute near the
West Virginia side of the river In a
cornfield was an old farmer who was
following the plow behind an old ilea-
ed Did you lose it from riding the hi- i bitten gray that only needed a half iu
vitation to stop at any time The pilot
put the megaphone to his mouth and
shouted Whoa and the old grav
whoaed
The farmer heard the sound and ho
thought evidently that a neighbor was
there or thereabout for he looked
around to see whence the sound came
Then he tossed a clod at the old horsu
and started him up
Whoa said the pilot and again
the old horse stopped Then the old
Rube went to the river bank and looked
down in the willows but not a soul
could he see He looked up and down
and then at the steamboat and scratch
ed his head in surprise He couldnt
afford to waste any time In looking for
the ghost for he went back to the plow
and started on with his job
Once more the joking pilot said
whoa and again the horse stopped
dead still You could see from the boat
that the old fellow was all mixed up
for he looked up and down the river
and then at the hillside behind him to
see if he could find the man who was
working him and his old horse Ha
made up his mind that he would take
it out of the old gray and to fix for the
occasion he went to the underbrush
and cut a stick that was ten feet long
He started the horse with a vengeance
When tbepijothollered whoa again
the old man gave the gfaya lick that
sounded clear to the boat We could
almost hear him say -
Thar gol darn you Ill teach you
to stop when ye hear a spook hollerln
at ye - -S - Tfe sse
pilot keTrrufJthe good work
and hollered whoa whoa and again
the old man hit the gray Finally It
looked as If he had caught on for he
let the old horse stop while he watched
the boat
Then the pilot thought he had had
enough fun and he called out
Feed the old gray feed him Hes
so hungry that he cant work Thats
all the matter with him
Then old Rube got his voice and we
heard him say You go to thunder with
your old voice Itd stop a railroad train
anywhere
A Chanjje of Ambition
Horatius at the bridge and he
Who fought at old Thermopylae
Great Samson and his potent bone
By which the Philistines were slone
Small David with his wondrous aim
That did for him of giant frame
J Caesar in his Gallic scraps
That made him lord of other chaps
Sweet William called the Conqueror
Who made the Briton sick of war
King Hal the Fifth who nobly fought
And thrashed the foe at Agincourt
Old Bonaparte and Washington
And Frederick and Wellington
Decatur Neteon Fighting Joe
And Farragut and Grant and oh
A thousand other heroes I
Have wished I were in days gone by
Can take their laurels from my door
For I dont want era any more
The truth will out it cant be hid
The doughty deed that Dewey did
In that far distant Spanish sea
Is really good enough for me
The grammars bad but O my son
I wish Id did what Dewey done
Harpers Weekly
Spells ol Southern Negroes
There are numerous harmless
spells which are regular observances
in the lives of the average Southern
negroes Besides the root chewing the
track lifting etc they have a love-
philter of frogs legs cooked in stilL
water and the ashes of a bat are pow
erful enough to keep a rival nr na
enemy To make a dog stay at home
they cut off the tip of his tail and bury
it under the doorstep To make a wife
obedient they draw her pictur aad
hide it in the shingles Thus waking
or sleeping there is a constant forcing
or counteracting of destiny
phi a Times
Startlinc Discovery
He See nere wife a hairpin In the
soup
She Now I know at last -where onr
things go to there is a bootjack miss
ing too
Circulation of Pennies
It is estimated that on an average
each penny in circulation change
hands eleven times a wee