The Valentine Democrat. (Valentine, Cherry Co., Neb.) 1896-1898, July 15, 1897, Image 7

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Found RcnsoiiH for Approval
There nro several cogent reasons why the
nuilicil profession recommend and tin pub
ic prefer Hostetter Stoiiiiicli ritters above
tlie ordinary cathartlrs It docs not drench
and weaken the bowels but usj Ms rather
Ihan foiees nature to act it is botanic and
safe its action Is never preceded Iy an In
crnal earthquake like that produced by i
drastic pin native For forty live years past
It has been a household remedy for liver
btoiuach and kidney i rouble
Not Inliiely P iinlcss
Dentist Did you give tlutt man
Iiughii ins
Assist ji ill Yes
Dentist How Ions did the effect last
Assistant TnUl he looked at the bill
Town Topics
Halls Catarrh Cure
Is taken internally Price 75 cents
Swifts letters to Stella and Vanessa
the two correspondences being carried
on at the same time are equally good
equally loving and at present equally
unreadable
WOMEN DONT WAIT
Ef You Have Any of These Symp
toms Act at Once
Do you know the reason why j ou will
go to the hospital my poor friend
Because you have allowed yourself
fco go from bad to worse You did not
Icnow that that heat swelling and ten
derness in your left side were all signs
of congestion of the ovary
Any intelligent woman could have
4oH you that congestion is fatal to the
uiterinc -iv
jzj77
system
and that
an ovary
uongest
5d leads
to tumor
forma
tion and
were -
rn
AWfiSSftvSv
you S
in awful vSsSs
Jh JVV Will
danger Now C
Y fe
WXsS If
VSSlHI I
you will have
to undergo the operation of ovariotomy
the cutting out of the ovary
Yes you will recover at least I hope
you will but you will never be quite
the same woman again Congestion of
the ovaries is fatal to health If you
have any such s3rmptoms be advised
in time take a medicine of specific
powers You can find none better
than Lydia E Pinkhams Vegetable
Compound prepared especially to meet
the needs of womans sexual system
You can get it at any good druggists
Following we publish a letter from
a woman in Milwaukee which relates
how she was cured of ovarian trouble
44 Dear Mrs Pinkham I suffered with
congestion of the ovaries and inflamma
tion of the womb I had been troubled
with suppressed and painful menstrua
tion from a girl The doctors told me
the ovaries would have to be removed
I took treatment two 3 ears to escape
an operation but still remained in
erable health inboth body and mind
Meeting to part with my reason each
coming month After using one bottle
of Lydia E Pinkhams Vegetable Com
pound and a package of Sanative Wash
I was very much relieved I continued
to use your remedies until cured The
last nine months have been passed in
perfect good health This I know I owe
Entirely to the Vegetable Compound
Sly gratitude is great indeed to the
one to whom so many women owe their
health and happiness Mrs F M
Kxapp 5G3 Wentworth Ave Milwau
kee3 Wis
i
W at the Susi llmmi
F S3 amsi rBJI Ita
rnn Ef -
WSUl i ri 6 Z3 t - o V3
ME1 PftlGES
Cfclia Bievdes
Tie Mari of tie World
1897 COLUMBIAS
Best Bicyclos made
REDUCED TO
1896 C0LUAI3IAS reduced to
I Second only to 1397 models
JS97 HARTFORDS REDUCED to
Equal to most Bicycles
HARTFCIOS
Pattern 2
HARTFORDS
REDUCED TO
REDUCED TO
Pattern 1
KARTFORDS
reduced to
Patterns 5 cad 6
75
iAS
fcS t Vi
iSjsjN
VJG fis
vS SS
At i
LIT US ALL LAUGH
JOKES FROM THE PENS OF
VARIOUS HUMORISTS
Pleasant Incidents Occurring the
World Ovci SayinptH that Are Cheer
ful to Old or Yoiiiik Funny
Selections that You Will Enjoy
And There They PticV
They always talk about the seven
at os of man said the Curious One
Why not the seven ages of woman
Because my boy replied the Know
Ins One one is enough for them
Ch rinnati Commercial Tribune
So Tricks
Some folks said Uncle Ebeii is so
tricky dat when dey comes acrost er
man dats shu nuff honest dey gets
skyaiht an says he mus be playin a
powful deep game Washington Star
BoltillK It
Mother Tohnmy how often have I
told you that you must not bolt youi
food
Johnny Guess it isnt any worse to
bolt my food than it is for you to turn
the key on it when its in the cupboard
Boston Transcript
Infectious
Uttle Boroham relating his Alpine
adventures There I stood the abyss
yawning at my feet
Cropper yawning portenliously
Sense me B but the tilings infectious
Household Words
One of tl c l ur Kiirns
What made you think Lillian was
literary V
Why she wears her hair so mus
py Cleveland Plaindoaler
A New Auto Motor
5
s
V stZz
l
aw
IS
w
Sl5SS1
TL t T ft
Talk about your roller skates New
York Journal
A Pretty Compliment
Miss Baquebay I had such a pretty
compliment from my optician to day
Miss Fenway What was it dear
Miss Baquebay Tie told me that I
had the best nose for eyeglasses that
ever came under his professional treat
ment Boston Transcript
Important Discovery
Bliffers reading Science now recog
nizes a condition allied intoxication
by radiation Many cases of drunken
ness are cited in which the victim had
touched nothing alcoholic but had sim
ply been in the company of drinkers
Whiffers Cut that ottt I want to
show it to my -wife Pearsons AVeekly
A Poer
Father axe generals brave men
asked Johnny of his father
Yes my son as a rule -was the
ansver
Then why does artists always make
pictures of em standing on a hill three
miles away looking at a battle through
an opera glass Tid Bits
Her Occupation
Well Mollie said the little girls
father what have you been doing all
day
Doing nothing said Moilie pout
ing Ive been donting most of the
nine Harpers Bazar
An Outcropping
now do you know that stranger is
from Brooklyn
He registered at the hotel as from
Greater New York Philadelphia
North American
More Generous
You said that when Ave were mar
ried you would refuse me nothing
Ill be still more generous Ill not
even refuse you nothing Ill give it to
you Cincinnati Enquirer
Bound to Weep
jptf
Nothing in the market approached the value
of tiicsc Bicycles at the former
prices what are they now
POPE MFG CO Hartford Conn
Catalogue free from any Columbia dealer by
mail from us for one 2 cent stamp
Mrs Mulligan An pliat be yez cryin
for Mrs Muldoon
Mrs Mukloon The banks busted
not a chit fur enny -vim
Mrs Mulligan An did yez have mon
ey saved in it Mrs Muldoon
Mrs Muldoon I did not but this is
the ivan Id go in ef I did Now York
Journal
i
CERSB
The Cheerful Idiot
So you say began the moderately
new boarder that he speculated on a
large scale exclusively May I inquire
what was the use of this large scale
Glad to answer you replied the
Cheerful Idiot He had to have it foi
weighing the consequences Indian
apolis Journal
X Kored Walk
Jmm
W if
-Chicago Inter Ocean
An Inference Probably
What would you cjiII the sound pro
duced when the two bodies come to
gether V asked the teacher who wis
trying to explain what a noise is to he
pupils
Oh a kis5 maam replied the little
girl who evidently had older sisters-
Ycnkers Statesman
The Kcul Trouble
They say he is short in his accounts
dont theyV
That is what they say but the fact
is he is short in his cash Pittsburg
Chronicle Telegraph
A Hint to the Kincr
Mr Felleheld It seems to be true
that Uneasy lies the head which wears
a crown
Mr Bloomfield No wonder I should
think a king would put on a more com
fortable nightcap Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph
Of Course Not
Why didnt you move on when the
policeman ordered you to asked the
New York judge of the prisoner
I no untershtand him shudge re
plied the prisoner
You seem to understand English all
right now
Yes shudge bud de pliceman no
speaka de English Yonkers States
man
The Supreme Power
Do you mean to say thundered the
court that you hold any human au
thority higher than the laws of tho
land
No stammered the timid witness
except when Im at home My wife
makes the laws there Detroit Freo
Press
Will It Come to This
Youthful Male Applicant I know
Ive been a pretty tough lot sir but
St Peter Oh never mind that walk
right in Young men are so terribly
scarce nowadays that we cant afford
to be particular Cleveland Plaindeah
er
Why They Do It
She A woman marries a man to
keep him indoors
lie And a man marries a woman to
keep her in hats Yonkers Statesman
Before Kis Time
1 Frl 1 lOT
J LjlJiMa l iff
ai 111
Sunday school Teacher Tommy who
made all these beautiful fields and
mountains
Tommy I dont know We just rnov
ed here
The Cheerful Idiot
One time said the traveled board
er Igotsnowedin on the Rocky Moun
tains and the only thing seven of us
had for two days to sustain life was
half a barrel of pickled pigs feet
You were indeed said the cheerful
idiot reduced to extremities In
dianapolis Journal
Her Post Graduate Course
Daughter Yes Ive graduated but
now I must inform myself in psychoid
ogy philology bibli
Practical mother Stop right where
you are I have arranged for you a
thorough course in roastology boilol
ogy stitchology darnology patchology
and general domestic hustology Now
get on your working clothes Detroit
Free Press
Couldnt Find Landseer
Madam Well Mary -what did you
think of the pictures at the academy
Mary Oh mum there was a picture
called Two Dogs after Landseer but
I looked at it for nearly half an hour
and I couldnt see anything of Land
seer Tit Bits
A Disagreeable Consequence
You say you hate to visit your rich
relatives Why Dont they treat you
well
Oh yes they always do everything
they can to make it pleasant for us
but my wife never gets through com
plaining until about two weeks after
each visit because we are not as well
off as they Cleveland Leaded
HOG WAS BaDLV rOUiuL
Mean Trick that Was Played 01 an
J n 11c cent hoat
The meanest trick that was ever
invented was played on a hog said
Uncle Jclm as he lighted Lis pipe and
settled inrck m his chair for ait alter
dinirer smoke A neighbor of oury
owned this hog and he was a mighty
wise critter ay my ttory will show
This neighbor also owned a large corn
field among other possessions and
this cornlield was well guarded by a
fence with but one gate Well this old
porker had the liberty of a held next
to the corn patch and the farmer was
astomshed one day to find the hog
wandering around in the forbidden ter
ritory The gate had not been opemxl
and there was no apparent break in tho
fence Farmer Joe drove him out but
next day he was back again He chas
ed him up and down the fence but to
no purpose The hog would go out
only through the gate though it was
certain he had not entered by that
way
Farmer Joe was curious and de
cided to keep a watch and solve the
porcine mystery In the early morning
the hog skirted the fence until he
came to a huge log which formed part
of it The log was hollow and by
some effort the hog squeezed through
and entered upon the premised land
Nothing could induce him to go back
by that entrance and the gate had to
be again opened
Upon examination Farmer Joe dis
covered that the log was crooked and
half circular in shape With the aid
of a hired man he pried it around so
that both ends opened into the vacant
Held The next morning Mr Hog start
ed for the cornfield as usual He trot
ted along the fence until he came to
the leg and worked his way into the
hollow log After a moment he emerg
ed at the opposite end of the log He
was probably the most surprised hog
in history lie looked around in a
dazed way and then gazed reproach
fully at the log Again he entered the
log and again he emerged on the wrong
side of the fence Thus he spent the
forenoon and only gave up the task
when it was apparent that some one
had done him wrong
There is a moral in this story said
Uncle John as he lighted another
match but you can apply it to suit
yourself I am afraid that as a people
we too often resemble Farmer Joes
heg and that no matter what we do
we come out on the same side of the
fenca
Make Your Will
A man possessed of one dollar or a
few hundred dollars has as much right
to arrange for the distribution of his
possessions as the man who has mill
ions It is also as incumbent upon the
man of small means to properly dis
ipose of his holdings as it is upon the
one who has more The lawyers of
this country would lose many fat fees
if those who have accumulated a por
tion of this worlds goods be it ever so
small would leave specific directions
as to what disposition should be made
of their property after death Making
a will is generally regarded as a very
solemn affair says National Stockman
Surrounded by all the glcom and sor
row of the death bed where these im
portant documents are generally made
the framing of a last will and testa
ment is a very serious and unpleasant
task
Many put this matter off on account
of the expense attached to it in law
yers fees etc Anyone who can write
a legible hand and express his ideas so
that they can be understood can write
his own will The simpler the form the
better so it is clear The following
form will make as strong a testament
as can be framed by any attorney
I of County
State do hereby make my last will and
to staniemt I give devise and bequeath
all niy estate real and personal to
heirs executors adminis
trators and assigns
I appoint sole executor of tlhis
will
In -Testimony whereof I have hereunto
set my hand Mils day of ISO
Siiiod
Signed published and declared by tho
-above named as and for
his last will and testament in the presence
of tis who in his presence and in the
presence of each otlher and at his request
have hereunto subscribed our names aj
w i messes
A will of this kind will hold in the
courts of any of the States if properly
witnessed Two witnesses are gener
ally necessary With this general form
the distribution can be made to include
any number of beneficiaries or cliang
ed to suit circumstances
A Bishops Centenary
The centenary of the consecration of
Bishop Bass of Massachusetts winch
was celebrated last week recalls some
anecdotes of the Bishop He refused
to live in Dorchester because the brooks
there were not large enough for Bass
to swim in His first marriage dis
pleased his parishioners whereupon he
preached to them a sermon from the
text They will slay me for my wifes
sake His parishioners would often
get in arrears with his salary which
never was more than j00 When the
the treasury was so low as to become
hopeless they would call upon him and
ask what -they should do
Well well he would say let it
go Ill release you and we will begin
jigain
At the A hist Club
Mr Wiggles Did you go to the whist
club to day
Mrs Wiggles Yes
Mr Wiggles What was the subject
for discussdcai this afternoon Somer
ville Journal
Every one admires the woman who
is so loyal to her husband that no one
dares pity Iter when he misbehaves
Experiment has shown that petro
leum ether can be used to measure by
its contraction temperatures several
hundred degrees below zero on the
Fahrenheit scale At the temperature
at which liquid air boils 10 degrees
Fahr below zero petroleum ether still
remains in a viscous or semi liquid con
dition and continues to contract with
decrease of temperature
Neglect ot Hie hair often destroys its
vitality and natural hue and causes it o
fall out iJefore it is too late apply Hair
Hair Uenewer a sure remedy
Two years ago SOU salmon trout were
turned into the ornamental water in St
James Park London But as these
lish cannot live except in fresh run
ning water all have perished whereas
roach and eels flourish in the lake
My doctor said I would die but Pisos
Cure for Consumption cured run Amos
Kelner Cherry Valley 111 Nov 2H
Caesar did not say Et to Brut
Eye witnesses of the assassination de
posed that he died fighting but silent
like a wolf
Alabaster is scarcely ranro Immaculate than the com
plexlon beautl ed witli llenns Milphur oap
Hills Hair ani Whisker Die black or brown JiOc
Thieves at Buckingnamshire Eng
land stole a bronze and stone fountain
fourteen feet high
rvirs Wiiixiowrt Southixo writer for ChllCren
lpttilnisllii the 3Uin reduce in ammatlonallajj
uain cures wind colic 25 cents a bottle
There is more snuff used in Boston
than in any other city in h United
States
BOILS BOILS BOBLS
Thoy Came Thick and Fast Till
Cured by Hoods Sarsapartlla
My brother had terrible boils on the
back of his noi k As fast as one wotdd
set bettor another would cnine He be
came very much emaciated and began
taking Hoods Sarsaparilla One bottlo
made a great improvement and when ho
had taien two bottles he was completely
cured I Enviv Mound City
Illinois Be sure to get
oods Sarsaparilla
Hoods Pills euro sck headache cents
Sara sate the violinist claims to have
a red Stradivarius for which he has
refused 30000
Shake Into Your Shoes
Allens Foot Ease a powder for the feet
It cures painful swollen smarting feet
and instantly takes the sting out of
corns and bunions Its the greatest
comfort discovery cf the age Allens
foot Ease makes tight fitting or new
slv s feel easy It is a certain
cure or sweating callous and hot tired
aciiiiiicet Try it to day Sold by all
druggisiVvutl shoe stores By mail for 25
cents in stips Trial package FREE
Address Alkj S Olmsted IeRoy X Y
The one who fails in character has
made the greatesufailure
FITS Iennannn ly Cnrrt No nts or nervensn ss
alter tirst ay um ot Ur Sreot Kent- its
1 orer end for rKE SIOO trid botth an realise
lit IC H Ki isE Ltd tm Arch si riniaueluhta Pa
They v ho wait to do great things
uever do anything
OPEN LETTER
To MOTHERS
WE ARE ASSERTING IN THE COURTS OUR RIGHT TO THF
EXCLUSIVE USE OF THE WORD CASTORIA AND
PITCHERS CASTORIA AS OUR TRADE MARK
I DR SAMUEL PITCHER of Ey minis Massachusetts
was the originator of PITCHERS CASTORIA tho samo
fJtn h lina hrrrnf rrnrl rJnpQ timn
hear the facsimile signature of S7Zc
07i every
wrapper
This is the original PITCHERS CASTORIA which has been
used in the homes of the mothers of America for over thirty
years LOOK CAREFULLY at the wrapper and see that it is
the hind you have always bought jFhl
and has the signature o 1 f s Lzs7jdcUb
1 O
t
ic
W SJ
wx rr
i YJJ
on tho
wrap
per No one has authority from me to use my name except
The Centaur Company of which Chas E Fletcher 13
President
March S 1897 1- 2---
Do Not Be Deceived
Do not endanger the life of your child by accepting a cheap substitute
which some druggist may offer you because he makes a few more penniea
on it the ingredients of which even 7ie does not know
The Kind You Have Always Bought
BEARS THE FAC SIMILE SIGNATURE OF
vTZ
fe7
Insist on Having
The Kind That Never Failed You
THE CCNTAUn COMPANY 7T MURRAY STREET NCWYORK CITY
-----
If a woman reads
Pearline ads and acts upon them shell
have plenty of time to read everything-
else rn the paper lnau
is what a woman writes to
us and shes a woman who
oueht to know How lare a
part of your time is spent in get
tine thin gs clean Havent yes
something better that youd like to
do if you had the time for it Time
is one of the things that Pearline
saves To hurrv up housework and
inake every kind of washing and cleaning- quick and easy use
Pearline
SSffiSSS
JI9IBIJIBISIMIWlleltlIWICII3ll0lieiaillIMIBII3lt3ll0IIMimMIlitlliO1CtOIl3ISlallrlllOIp
1 flFh W Efrb S
5
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SSPBSiBPESf ALWAYS TRGE T I
iCJaf AwHE i TO TliE LAZY UVE8 1
I Poisonous matter instead of being thrown out is reabsorbed into I
the blood wlien this poison reaches the delicate brain tissus it
s rmecc rnnwctmn ntyA irhf snwfftt rtutL tbrnbbincr sickening oairx 9
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x ract
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BCYCLc
Western Wheel Works
Cff CA GO CI SOS
CATAL9GVE FREE
bst Red Rope Rooflnpforl ct
jicrsn foot cih anil nails Included
substitutes for llaster -ain Dies free
ay Manilla Roofing Co Camden J
STENTS
H D WILLSON L CO Wash
lagtoa DC K o charge till patent
obtatcod GOpmcc book free
2
cw nihiiiiur e ia sijhj 11 1 wKuaifK a
Tf V XSk as- i PAKry
WfeS fFPW
STIMUUTIN6 THE LIVES I
s Making the poison move on and out and purifying- the blood
I The effect is ALMOST INSTANTANEOUS
s ft a 5 ja
A1J uxr
f whose sensitive organism is especially prone to sick headaches DO 5
OJ3 RTrs T7 W HhKB in trm r in hir th fc nt t ftMhKt 1 3 K
u a ir i X JS XLN Ul JJl W M j ww w j g
I gZSZSZ Relieved Like raagsc I
oilKiomiaitieiiiioiiaisiiwiii8iatiiiiauiiaiiieuiiiHwmiMiMiiiiMiiitiiiiciMWieiiliwiiiieisiiatf
Use the Means and Heaven Will Give
You the Blessing Never Negiect
A Useful Article Like
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tSl cot -a uitarf
rSWTKtEiW3
XT VCINCIXJfJinOI J
N Ks m
CURE YQ URSELF
f P IfiT Ci r tinrTr1
diFrnarjjefc iaiaijion
irritations or ulcerations
of mucous raembranes
Pitnlttm an tw ialM
UHEHiaLCO gent or poionuG5
Sold ny IJrnjist
or sent it plain -wrapper
by ezpreg prppaid for
Si CO r r 3 boftleg 27
Circular sent on request
gawfecefeggysgagaag
CURES WHchc
t CouKh Syrup
29 97