. 7-.
If sr- KS were what •
tlie rose is
And r u bbi s h w ere
the leaf
1 need not ask your
pardon
For showing you
my garden;
•Twould be what
each one knows
is
Of flower beds the
chief—
If Btieks were what
the rose is
Ami rubbish were
the leaf.
If weeds were what
green hedge is
Ami plantain were
but grass.
My lawn would be
k fair one
And not a skimped
and bare one
With bald spots
where the edge
is.
3 would not say
"Alas!"
.11 we< ■ i
green hedge is
A nd plantains
were but grass.
11 burdock were but |_ I
clover
And sand were candytuft
The bees In gladness coming
Would fill the air with humming
Instead of darting over
As though in tempers huffed,
If burdock were but clover
And sand were candytuft.
Were parsley morning glories
And pigweed hollyhocks
Then nodding, fragrant flowers
Would sway through sun and shower*
l«ik< honey-laden dories
Tied up to fairy docks—
Were parsley morning glories
And pigweed hollyhocks.
Wert dandelions pansies
And thistles mignonette
Then would my little garden
'Be as tlie vale of Arden
Filled with all scented fancies
In blossom-beauty set—
Wen dandelions pansies
And thistles mignonette.
If plantain were but blue grass
Arid sand were only turf
Each morn rnv clicking mower
Would only serve to lower
Tin velvet of the new grass;
I'd bf a singing serf
11 plantain were but blue grass
And sand were only turf.
.
i
0LDM^rGsbI>ibS
Observes.
Son. go ahead
and be a million
aire, but after
people get tired
ol asking where
you got it, they
will begin pester
ing you to know’
what you are go
ing to do with it.
There should be
some special form-———
of medals for heroes who refuse to
say: "1 only did what any other man
would have done.”
Some men confound an excuse with
an apology.
Ezra Potts says that preachers al
ways deliver sermons against women's
dress when they want the men to con
tribute to some fund or other.
A magazine is running a series of
articles on "How a Woman May Re
tain the Love of Her Husband.” One
way is for her not to insist on reading
the series of articles to him.
Whenever I read some great man’s
rules for success and note how he
dwells upon the hard-work idea. 1 have
a mental picture of him dictating that
stuff with his feet on the desk and his
auto waiting at the curb.
There is about as much talk about
an old woman who dresses like a girl
as there is about a girl who dresses
old-fashioned.
No Mistake.
“Daughter,” says the ambitious
mother, "I am afraid you made a
mistake in treating Mr. Billiocrat as
you did.”
"How do you mean, mamma?"
“By acting with such hauteur tts
ward him when he stole a kiss. 1
knew he is a trifie impetuous and all
that, but—”
"But I didn't make a mistake, mam
ma i didn't act the least bit angry
until after he had kissed me.”
Its Last Request.
The hunter had just bagged hie first '
gnu on the African plains.
"There is just one last request I
would make," it sighed. "Please do
not simplify the spelling of my name
when you send your report in to your
publishers.”
Welcome Home.
“Why there's Smith!” his friends u«
shouting.
"Where the dickens have you been?"
“I’ve been out upon an outing
Jn an inning in an inn.”
CHANGES IN FIGHTING SHIPS.
United States Naval Designers Have
Recently Made a Number of
I mprcvements.
The principal changes are the re
moval of bridges, tiie taking out of
the old military masts and the sub
stitution for them of the new circular
latticework masts for carrying the
lire control platforms. The alter
bridge and its associate armored sig
nal lower have been removed and the
forward bridge has been greatly cut
down The extensions of this bridge
on each side of the conning tower are
now so arranged that they can he
quickly removed in time for battle,
the captain of the ship being hence
forth compelled to take his station
within the conning tower, where he
properly belongs My the removal of
the top hamper It will he possible for
the captain to command the horizon,
except through that arc of it which is
shut out by the smokestacks. Bays a
writer m the Scientific American.
This change will remove one more
of the picturesque and popular epi
sodes of the earlier days of sea fight
ing Tiie* captain will no longer tight
liis ship from the flying bridge and
in the open. The conning tower was
built tor him, and a due regard for
the issues oi the battle demands that
he remain within it. it was the
death of Admiral Vitboft, of the Czare
vitch, that threw the Russian line Into
disorder in the great sortie front Port
Arthur at the very time when the
chances ot shaking oft the Japanese
seemed favorable. The captain of one
of the battleships in that fight told
ns that the admiral was struck by a
shell as be was leaning with folded
arms upon tlie railing of the bridge
watching the Japanese line. That
shot also wrecked the < mining tower,
it is true, but the latter was of a de
sign which would not be considered in
our navy
In addition to tlie removal of top
hamper, the whole of the accumulated
layers of old paint throughout the
ships jh being removed; and in future,
with a view to further reducing
weights, no ship will be allowed to
carry an accumulation of stores be
yond the regular six months’ supply.
As showing the absurdity of the state
ment that the structural changes men
tioned atiove are being made in order
t< bring the "deeply-laden ships” up
to a lighter draft, it may be mentioned
that when the alterations are com
pleted the draft will be only from
three-quarters of an inch to 114
inches less than belore.
Drinking Cups of the Ancients.
Silver cups made by such famous
workmen as Myron, Myos and Mentor,
were preferred to gold cups. They
were beautifully engraved and of
workmanship which has never been
equaled When gold cups were en
riched with precious stones, they
sometimes became peers of the en
graved silver vessels
Of all sizes, shapes and designs
were these drinking cups, and their
value was measured more by their
form and design than the material of
which they were made. Some had two
handles, some only one and some none
at all They were large and small,
low and tali, narrow and oblong. They
were purely the product of the vary
ing fancy oi that prodigious age,
which seemed to scorn uniformity.
The early Ureeks and Homans
drank hot water from cups, as we now
drink coffee and tea, these beverages
being unknown to them. Coffee orig
inated with the Assyrians, and tea
was first used by the Chinese at a
very early age.—National Food Mag
azine.
ExcelEicr and Cullinan.
The two largest diamonds in the
world have been brought to light with
in the last score of years. Great dia
monds have been the objects of zeal
ous pursuits for centuries, and even
the cause of murders and wars insti
gated by the mad desire for their ac
quisition. In the case of the great
historic diamonds, however, we lack
complete and authentic information
regarding every stage of their history
which we possess in reference to
these magnificent diamonds in our
own day. it is true that no important
historic happening has yet been asso
ciated with either of them, but we are
making history every day, and there
can be little doubt that in the future
the story of the Excelsior and Cullin
nan diamonds will be as eagerly
sought lor as is that of the Koh-l-nur,
the Regent and the Orloff.—From Dr.
George Frederick Kunz' "The Two
Largest Diamonds," in the Century.
Enjoying a Shew.
Here's a hot one on Powell Hale.
He entertained in Whiteville, N. C.,
in April, so Edwin Weeks says, and a
negro hoy went to the op'ry house
■with him to tote his grip Alter the show
was over and the Senegarnbian serv
itor and good old Hale were meander
ing back to the drummer's home, the
entertainer said to Snowball:
"Did you enjoy the show?"
"Yes, sah 1 joyed mob' of it.”
“You did not enjoy it all, you say?”
"No sah, 1 joyed it all but de very
las piece what you spoke
Why, what was the matter with
that piece?”
"Well, sah, all dem white folks
laffed so loud dey kep’ me 'wake en
during de las’ piece "—The Lyceum
ite.
At a Casual Glance
"Don't you think iny poetry resem
bles Tennyson’s?” said the confident
young writer.
“It does,” answeied Miss Cayenne,
‘‘In the capitalization und the arrange
ment of lines into varying lengths.”
HIS. KINDLY HEART
CHAMPION SENSITIVE MAN WAS
THIS VERMONT CITIZEN,
His Mantle of Kindness Even Spread
Over That Pestilential Enemy of
the Human Race, the Blood
thirsty Mosquito.
“1 think the most sensitive man I
ever knew," said Col Calliper, "was
nil old friend of mine named Jonathan
Saglow. who lived at one time in
Storkville Center, Yt. lie couldn't
bear to see pain inflicted on man or
beast, and any sort of cruelty filled
him with great indignation,
“On Mr. Saglow's place there was
a little hit of swamp hjnd which he
had never drained and which fur
nished a breeding place for what i
suppose were the greatest and llere
est mosquitoes that ever grew, but
Saglow had no screens on his porch
or windows. He did have some once
on his porch but he took them down
the next day after he put them up.
"People hesitated to call on the
Saglows in summer on account of
those mosquitoes. There were mos
quitoes, sure enough, elsewhere in
Storkville Center than around where
they lived, but none quite so big and
ferocious as those that grow in Sag
low's swamp.
Then one day, to Stork ville Cen
tre's great astonishment, Mr. Saglow
was seen putting up screens around
his front porch; the next day, to its
still greater astonishment, lie was
seen taking them down, and Mr. Sag
low wasn't a man that everybody
could run up to to ask the whys and
wherefores of anything he'd done, but
one day in a friendly mood he told me
why lie had taken down the screens
the very day after he had put them up.
“He admitted freely Hint that, one
night they had had on the porch with
tlie screens up had been most comfort
able for them all; that to sit there
and not lie bored into by those ginnt
mosquitoes had been an experience
that they had all greatly enjoyed; but
what he saw in the morning when he
came to look the screens over by
daylight prompted him to take them
down immediately.
“Sticking through these screens, till
over, all around, everywhere, he saw
mosquitoes’ broken off beaks you can
judge what sized beaks tliej were
when 1 tell you that those screens
were not very line meshed—big beaks
which mosquitoes had thrust through
the netting in their efforts to get at
the people inside, and which had be
come wedged there and been broken
off when the mosquitoes had beaten
up against those screens and how
many had stuck their beaks through
and still been able to get them out
again nobody could know, but here
were 94 broken off benks si ill stick
ing through the meshes of file net
ting.
“Now most people, you know, would
have found a sort of savage joy in the
contemplation of those broken off
spears and in the thought that so
many giant pests had thus been
made innocuous; but not so with
Jonathan Saglow.
“When he saw those 94 broken off
beaks the first thought that came to
him was of the poor wounded and
walned mosquitoes wandering beak
less around the world deprived of their
only means of sustenance; and
straightway he tore down the screens
so that others might not by them he
made likewise to suffer; for not even
upon the sufferings of mosquitoes
could lie dwell with serenity, this
most sensitive man I ever knew.”
Malaria.
Malaria ever has been, and is yet,
the great barrier against the invasion
of the tropics by the white races, nor
has Its injurious influences been con
fined to the deaths that it causes.
It has been held by careful students
of tropical diseases and conditions,
that no small part of that singular
apathy and indifference which steal
over the mind and body of (he white
colonist in the tropics, numbing even
liis moral sense and alternating with
furious outbursts of what the French
have termed “tropical wrath,” charac
terized by unnatural cruelty and ab
normal disregard for the rights of
others, is the readly work of ma
laria.—Outing.
Reducing the Range of Wit.
Mark I wain once said there were
but seven original jokes. Now there
are but six. The management of a
long chain of vaudeville houses lias
decreed that no actor in playing in its
circuit shall spring the mother-in-law
Joke upon the helpless audience; and
while this action does not quite elim
inate the joke from common usage it
so clippies it that it may be regarded
as a hopeless invalid doomed to early
oblivion or dissolution.
Matching His Feelings.
“Kagsbv is very chesty since he
started to buy a new house.”
“Yes, so much so that he insisted
on getting one with a swell front.”—
Yonkers Statesman.
Color Blind.
Servant—A pound of tea for the
missus.
Grocer—Green or black?
Servant—Shure, ayther will do.
She’s as blind as a bat!—Judge.
When Women Vote.
He—Aren’t you ready to go down to
the polls yet. dear?
She—Not yet..
What are you doing—trying to make
up your mind or your face?—Yonkeys
Statesman
t
Benner's Famous Advertisement.
When the New York Ledger was
wavering on the hrluk of failure, Rob
ert lionner, the proprietor, sent to the
New York Herald a brief advertise
ment, to be set up in a single line. So
llreeleyesque was Mr Bonner's hand
writing that the advertising manager
Interpreted the directions as order
ing that the copy lie run in full page
which instructions lie obeyed, though
marveling greatly. The Herald eatne
out tin* next morning with one whole
page devoted to the crisp ndjuratlon
t(» read the Ledger's new story. The
effect upon Mr. lionner was almost la
tal, first from chagrin at the thought
of the possible hill, then from amaze
ment ns subscriptions began to pour
In, and finally from satisfaction, ns
they continued to flood the office, un
til till* fortune of the publication was
ltiaih The novel, though accidental,
device had stria k the public's fancy
Mr. Rentier was hailed as the pioneer
of a new and daring theory of exploit
ation, and the advertisement gained
tenfold currency by being commented
upon as a feature o! the news Col
ller's.
LET U3 TAKE YCUR ORDER
Knickerbocker
f0E
Company
CALL TELEPHONE NO. 28©
The Buyers’ ^
Guide
Tbe fintis whose names ate repre
sented in our advertising columns
are worthy of tbe confidence ol every
person in the community who has
money to spend. The tact that they
advertise stamps them as enterpris
ing. progressive men of business, a
credit to our town, and deserving of
support. Our advertising columns
comprise a Muyers’ Guide to fair
dealing, good goods, honest prices.
V__J
Don't forget •
the little folks
4th of July
They have two days
to celebrate this year.
We’ve got things they
WANT at our store.
Call and look them
over and make your
selections early.
McMillan’s
Pharmacy
Opposite Postoffice falls City. Neb.
CLEAVER &, SEBOLD
INSURANCE
REAL ESTATE AND LOANS
NOTARY IN OFFICE
SHIGHESTER SPILLS
h.
DIAMOND GRAND
LA MFC !
Ar'i your Nrur«l** for CITT-CHKS TFR'S A
DIAM< 1 J RANI) PILLS in Ki d tndA\
{ r x €■ sealed with BluevO/
Ril ' r Ti.KB NO C-TIIER. Hu; oFyourW
bi.ii tnk fop ('lll.CllKk.Tr KM V
I> l A Afl (i M> Hit A N l» I* I l. I.n, for twenty-five
regarded as Best .Safest, Always Reliable.
SOLD BY ALL DRUGGISTS
ffi, everywhere
t
TRADE MARKS
Designs
Otti’ Copyrights Ac.
Anyone sending a sketch and description may
quickly ascertain our opinion free whether an
invention ia probably patentable. Com noun lea
lions st rictly confidential. HANDBOOK <>u Latent*
pent free. Oldest agency for securing patent*.
Latent* taken through Munn A. Co. receive
fprctal notice, without charge, In the
Scientific American.
A handsomely Illustrated weekly. Largest cir
culation of any scientific Journal. Terms, $3 a
year; four months, Bold by all newsdealers.
MUNN & Co.38,B,«*“» New York
branch Office. F Bt« Washington. b. C.
Falls City
Chautauqua
July 24th
=====*=== TO _.JM=a^a
August 1st
Biggest and Best Ever
Why Not Secure a Tent
Seasonable Suggestions
To be Found Here:
Lowe Bros.’ Paint
Pittsburgh Electrically Welded Fencing
Fishing lackle and Sporting Goods
Alaska and White Frost Refrigerators
Call Our I inner Before the Spring Rains
J. C. TANNER
Falls City Nebraska
Plumbing z:zHardware
Chas. M. Wilson
HAS IN STOCK FISH GLOBES
1-2 gal. to 3 gal. in size
Tumblers in a number of stylos and prices, from 30c to
$2.50 per dozen. See the 15c Glassware. You
can t match it at the price. Anything you want in bancy
China or Dinnerware.
A Complete Stock of Groceries
Fine Coffees and Teas a Specialty
Chas. M. Wilson's
Announcement
* We are pleased to announce that our Spring
campaign of the biggest values in Farm Ma- j
chinery for lyoy is now on. You are invited to
call and inspect our lines.
A complete line of John Deere Farm Machin
ery, Hay Loaders and Stackers.
McCormick Binders and Mowers.
Avery Cultivators and Planters. 1
Sharpies Tubular and DeLaval Cream Sep
arators.
Litchfield Spreaders.
Gasoline [Engines. Old Hickory and Avery
Wagons. Keys Bros’, and Vehlie Buggies.
No trouble to show our goods.
Loucks & Jones
FALLS CITY NEBRASKA
A HOST TOUCHING APPEAL
falls short of its desired effect if ad
dressed to a small crowd of interested
listeners. Mr. Business Man, are
vou wasting your ammunition on the
small crowd that would trade with
you anyway, or do you want to reach
those who are not particularly inter
ested in your business? If you do,
make your appeal for trade to the
largest anu most intelligent
audience in your commun
ity, the readers of this
paper. They have count
less wants. Your ads will
be read by them, and they
will become your custom
ers. Try it and see.
