k tf n J AWRECKJHTHERflftD What a Collision Means to the Man at th Throttle PLIGHT OF THE ENGINEER The Chances He Has to Take and His Fate Should Ho Become Crippled In a Smashup There Are Some Things Worse Than Physical Pain I junt dropped In to tell you thnt the coroners Jury has exonerated you from all blame for the wreck They are going to hold the block tower man The old engineer turned his pain drawn face toward me A white cap ped nurse gently brushed back the wild hairs from his forehead Thank you miss he said and you too sir for the good news I knew they couldnt blame It on me because it was white at Mentor Poor Denny hed tell you so too if he was alive All white he shouted when we came round the curve and I gave him the answer All white and pulled her wide open Then we struck the emp ties on the siding and well you know the rest lie wiped a trembling hand across his eyes as if trying to blot out Eome horrible vision His eyes began to sparkle and a bit of color flashed into his pale cheeks I suppose you fellows think I opened her up and went into those boxes just for fun A smile flitted over his lips and then he grew serious Say did it ever come to your mind that an en gineer might be as anxious about his own life as he is about the lives of those who are riding behind him My wife and little one dont you suppose my life counts for something with them Did you ever stop to think what a collision like that at Mentor means to the engineer Just try to tigure your self In his place He rides in four square feet of cab room surrounded by a mass of levers rods and the like Ahead of him is about three miles of boiler pipe carrying 200 pounds of steam pressure and enough hot water to cook the meat off his bones In a jiffy Clatteriug at his back Is G000 gallons of water and 20000 pounds or coal Under him Is 200000 pounds of engine and behind there is G00000 pounds of train Altogether he Is running along ahead of 800000 pounds of steel hardwood and brass held to an eighty pound rail by three quarters of an inch of wheel flange Why when one of those big Rus sian battleships fired a broadside at the Japanese the whole thing amounted only to 24000 pounds so the papers say And that 24000 pounds traveling eight miles a minute would strike a Japanese ship eight miles away with an Impact only one tenth of the force we lilt the empties at Mentor Of course I was the engineer and they depended on me There is al ways a lot of fine talk about engineers having the lives of several hundred passengers in their hands Thats ail very true but you dont want to over look the fact that the engineers life is right there along with the others We all take chances the train crew as well as the passengers only our chances are slimmer I had one chance in 500 of being killed or one in twenty five of getting right where I am now but a passenger on the train had one chance In about 3000000 of being killed and one in 130000 of being hurt I see that a lot of people were killed and a whole lot more hurt I dont want to be a grumbler but it appears to me that you fellows have kinder overlooked the fact that both of my legs are gone Of course that might not mean much to you but if you realized as I do that for the rest of my life it is going to be my job to hobble out into the middle of some country road and wave a white flag as every train goes by if you could real ize what that means to an engineer to hear the mocking toot of the whis tle as she comes up to the crossing and to see the sympathetic salute of the engineer and fireman as they go flying by I tell you my boy there are some things worse than physical pain His eyes filled with tears The nurse gently wiped them away and softly stroked back the hair I wouldnt talk any more now she said All right miss he replied putting out his hand to me I always obey orders B R Wlnslow in New York Tribune A Free Translation And you say the idiot of a teacher told you that you had an extravagant fool of a father Thats what he meant But what did he say He said it was criminal folly to waste money on the education of such a chump as I am Cleveland Plain Dealer Nothing Left Have you asked the judge of a recently convicted man anything to offer the court before sentence is passed No your honor replied the pris oner my lawyer took my last far thing London Tit Bits The Last Word Conductor This here transfer expired an hour ago lady The Lady digging in her purse snappishly No wonder with not a single ventilator open in the whole car Puck If you would relish your food labor tor it Danish Eroverb - - DIDNT NEED IT Vhy a Scotch Farmer Refused a Por tion of Dessert Could the funny saylugs and Inci dents at the tenants dinners in Scot land be collected they would make an unrivaled book of humor Mistakes of amusing and sometimes embarrassing nature occur frequently at such func tions One story Is told of u guest at a Scottish tenants dinner who tasted ice cream for the first time on that oc casion lie pushed n large spoonful of the frozen mixture into his mouth and jumped from his chair with agony ex pressed on his face He let out a yell and cried out Ow ow ma rotten tooth and could not be Induced to eat any more At another Scottish affair of the kind a good old farmer was seated next to the hostess She served him a bit of savory omelet which seemed to cause the old man deep disappointment His Idea of an omelet had always been a dessert with sugar or fruit or jams and after tasting the sample before him he turned to the hostess and said Weel ma lady I cauna compliment you on your puddins The late Duke of Buccleuch told a story of a tenant at one of the farmers dinners on his estates who was asked by the duchess If he would take some rhubarb a dish she was fond of The fanner was surprised but answered politely Im muckle obleeged to your grace but I dlnna need It FINDINGS NOT KEEPINGS Lost Articles Are Always Crying Out For Their Owners When one is on the public thorough fare or in the street car or train or boat and picks up an object that is valuable is it his True he maj find something which Is too small and trifling to warrant searching to find the owner such as a handkerchief a pair of gloves etc But when lie finds something of value it is not his until be has done every thing in his power to find the owner The street railways and trains are so systematized today that if when one finds an object of value he re turns it to the companys representa tive it is almost sure to catch up with its owner Every person of intelli gence knows that the first place to inquire for it is at the lost and found department When however one Is on the street and finds something which if he lost it himself he would very much like to have returned there are the columns of a newspaper In which to advertise If he fails to find the owner after this then he can rightfully call it his own and have a clear conscience but if he avoids looking over the lost and found columns and fails to do his part toward finding the owner he is almost as dishonest as if he took the goods Chicago Record Herald Serious For Once An army captain on returning home from India brought with him a goodly stock of souvenirs Among them was a pair of laughing jackasses which he intrusted to one of the sailors Tom Pinch Alas The unaccustomed shipboard life did not agree with the creatures and in spite of all Toms care they pined and finally died When he discovered the catastrophe Tom was in despair I darent tell the captain Dont shirk it mate said his pal Break it to him gently Youll find Itll be all right The advice seemed sound and Tom sought the gallant captain Scuse me sir he said you know them things below what you call Iarfin jackasses Well sir they aint got nuffin to larf at this morning London Scraps His Choice of Weapons M Victor Noir an illiterate bully of the time of the second empire for no real reason whatever sent a French statesman a challenge to fight a duel Noir was a densely ignorant man and nearly every word in the challenge was misspelled The statesman re sponded with the following letter Dear Sir You have called me out without any good reasons I have therefore the choice of weapons I choose the spelling book and you are a dead man The duel was never fought Counting It Up There is a son of Erin in Newton Mass who is quite a character He has a number of children and was asked one day how long he had been married Well he said theres Eu gene is forty and Norah thirty five that makes sivinty five and Lizzie is thirty two and how many do that make The Wise One Thin Boarder I dont see how you manage to fare so well at this board ing house I have industriously court ed the landlady and all her daughters but Im half starved Fat Boarder I courted the cook Kansas City Inde pendent Arrangements Complete Arrangements for the wedding are all complete Everything attended to Yes we have even made a deal with a photographer to have his cam era smashed Louisville Courier Journal The Cards Are Out Ysobel do you think you could learn to love me Learn to love you Oh Reginald f could give lessons in loving you St Louis Republic Fortune brings in some boats that are not steered Shakespeare GUiDlUR hue How the Treasury Vaults at Washington Are Protected WATCHERS DAY AND NIGHT Always on Duty and Always Prepared to Shoot to Kill Never Has a Dol lar Been Taken From Them by Force One Daring Scheme Not a dollar has ever been taken from the United States treasury by force Perhaps the nearest approach to loot ing the vaults of the treasury was the time Martin Broadfoot had his plans about perfected This was back in the eighties and the plan was to get Into the building by means of the great sewer which runs under and near the treasury and is known as the Fifteenth street sewer and which grows larger as it enters the Potomac about three quarters of a mile from the White House Broadfoots plan as developed after his arrest was to get into the building crack the safes and place the money In large rubber bags and float them down the sewer to the Potomac where his pals would be in waiting These bags were found in his room when he was arrested and secret service men had often seen him walking along the shores of the Potomac near where the big sewer empties This sewer is about nine feet In diameter where it passes the treasury A man could easily make his way up the sewer through a stream of water which un der normal conditions is only about twelve inches deep By entering the tunnel or sewer at the river the jour ney to the treasury could be made by keeping a sharp lookout When the man or men in the sewer reached the Fifteenth street sewer nothing would separate them from the gold coinTind bullion except about eighteen feet of earth and not too secure stone wall It was Broadfoots scheme to dig his way through this obstruction and to let the earth float or wash down the sewer It would not have taken one man more than two weeks working only at night to have made an opening large enough for a man to crawl through Of course Broadfoot knew the exact location of the vaults and when he once reached them he would have had no trouble in getting the gold coin and bullion It was evidently his purpose to fill the rubber bags with the precious stuff and float them down the sewer to the river where they would be looked after by his confed erates This was the only really well laid plot ever made to loot the treas ury and just why Broadfoot was never given a trial has never been known to the public He was an intel Jigent man and suspicion was first aroused against him by his frequent visits to the money rooms and vaults and by the questions he asked watch men and messengers as to the hours of duty when the time locks closed and what time they opened and all such questions That he could have successfully carried out his plans so far as getting into the building and the vaults are concerned there is no question for men have been in the sewer and conduits who say that it would have been easy work The most difficult part of the job would have been in getting away with the money and bullion for it would have required hard work to secure it and get away About the only chance would have been to bury it somewhere in Virginia for if It had been placed on boats it would have been easy to recover it It is the opinion of the secret service men that many celebrated cracksmen have from time to time contemplated the conversion of a few million treas ury notes to their own use but after careful study they have decided that the undertaking was too colossal in character Secretary Folger when he assumed his duties was not slow in deciding that the treasury was not properly and safely guarded There was not an oleetric alarm in ie build ing the watchmen were isol od an had no facilities for calling and the safes were of the old time I u i and key sort scattered aluiost ll tiver the big building The secretary went to work to bring about a prober erudition of affairs Ht luiI the watch system completely changed and reorganized putting them tner the strictest disci pline Elaborate and extensive alarm systems were installed Tr old safes were replaced by modern steel affaire with time locks and intricate combina tions The gold and silver vaults were fitted with steel casings and tinw locks different parts of t combina tions being distributed a man- various officials so that the vaults could be opened only with the concerted of all of them and then only at the stroke of the hour for whlcn the rime locks had been set But without a per fect system of watchmen to guard the safes the treasury could be easily rob bed for the most perfect safe ever made is not proof against the profes sionals The watch force of the treasury is perfectly organized and the least in fraction of rules means a layoff or dis charge The men seem to realize the heavy responsibilities resting upon them and they are careful almost to a fault The watch is divided into three reliefs the tour of duty lasting for eight hours However the watch does not anticipate an attack by robbers but they are prepared for any emergen cy and they will not be caught nap ping should one ever be made either at night or by day Each watchman is a regular walking arsenal and the In structions are to shoot and shoot to kill Los Angeles Times THE PILLORY Titus Oates and Daniel Defoe Both Suffered In It In the year 1S37 the British parlia ment passed an act that put an end to punishment by pillory Previous to the conquest this particular instrument of correction was In use in Englaud and went by the name of the stretch neck It consisted of a wooden frame erected on a stool In which were three holes for the head and arms For days together offenders agaiust the common law were thus exposed to pub lic view From historic accounts It ap pears that this particular form of pun ishment was meted out to those con icted of frauds of every description not only In Eugland but in nearly every country in Europe In the days of the star chamber when religious feeling ran high the pillory was the ordinary punishment meted out to those who offended against the church In KJSn Titus Oates was sentenced to be pilloried for five days in every year during the rest of his life Another famous sufferer was Daniel Defoe the author of Robinson Crusoe who stood for three days In the pillory In Cheapside It happened on occasions that the offender died while under going his sentence During the time of exposure the condemned man was not allowed to receive food of any sort or description The last occasion on which a pillory sentence was passed was in ISM London Globe A KINGS HOBBY The Mania of Frederick William I For Collecting Giants Of all the manias that afflict man kind the most ancient and curious is probably that for collecting The vic tims collect pretty nearly everything from books to shoe buckles and front pots to postage stamps but giant col lecting was the hobby of Frederick William I king of Prussia Nature designed him for a recruit lug officer destiny made him a mon arch All were fish who camo to his net Saxons Austrians Hessians Turks Swedes Englishmen Irishmen Africans provided they were at least two yards long Some of his speci mens were seven feet long Now and then he obtained one still more pro digious The Saxon cabinet minister Wack erbarth foreseeing the possible ad vantages of standing well with so near a neighbor in 1715 dispatched to Ber lin a recognition of his Prussian maj estys birthday Aug 14 no less flat tering than unique since it consisted of a large bundle of tobacco leaves two handsome Turkish pipes and a bagful of fragrant Latakia all com mitted to the hands of seven foot pas sengers with a missive imploring the kings gracious acceptance of these trifles and the Cupid who bore them St Louis Post Dispatch A Smile From a Stranger Most of us owe debts of gratitude to strangers whose kindly smile has sent sunshine into our aching hearts and has given us courage when we were disheartened It is a great thing to go through life with a smiling face It costs little but who can ever estimate its value Think how the pleasure of life would be increased if we met smiling faces everywhere faces which radiate hope sunshine and cheer What a joy it would be to trSvel in a gallery of liv ing pictures radiating hope and cour age Who can estimate what beautiful smiling faces mean to the wretched and the downcast those whose life burdens are crushing them Many of us carry precious memories of smiling faces which we glimpsed but once but whose sweet uplifting expression will remain with us forever Success Magazine She Was Deliberate It is said that Dinah Mulock Cralk the famous author of John Halifax Gentleman made a habit of leaving at her bank the manuscript of each of her stories as soon as it was completed It would remain there perhaps six months and then she would call for it and see how the story affected her after that lapse of time If it pleased her the manuscript was sent to the publisher Otherwise it was rewritten cr thrown away Ear Wagging Only animals with long and drooping ears are able to wag them A rabbit for instance can do what it likes with its ear dropping one or both and lay ing them flat along its back when dashing through thick cover Hares are still more brisk in ear movements But short eared beasts like weasels and stoats are unable to wag their ears in any degree although they have enough ear to wag if they had the power Accurate See here landlord said an angry tenant after he had signed the contract for a year this house is full of sewer gas Yes thats what I told you Told me Yes You asked me if there was gas in every room and I said there ivas London Answers His Right Hand My husband said the fair bride says I am his right hand I hope rejoined her mother that he isnt like that man who never lets his right hand know what his left hand does Chicago News Easy to Suit Mrs Eastend Youll not find me dif ficult to suit Nora Nora the new maid Im sure not maam I saw your husband as I came in maam Pittsburg Observer PRINTERS BLUNDERS Comic Effects Frequent In the Day When Bad Copy Was the Rule Typographical errors that produced weird or comical effects are described by the St Louis Republic In an article recalling the days wheu all of hat newspapers type was set by hand be fore the Introduction of typesetting machines when the copy instead of being typewritten was turned over to the printer In an Infinite variety of good bad and Indifferent chlrography Comparatively few of the errors were allowed to contribute to the giy ety of the subscribers as the majority were squelched In the house of cor rection as the proofroom was face tiously termed From a collection made by a proofreader the following instances of ridiculous misreading of copy are taken Ills blushing bride was trans formed into his bluBterlug bride A captain was said to have served with destruction in the Confederate army but the writer thought he wrote distinction Two pictures entitled The Galley Slave and Each In Their Turn were referred to as The Galley 1 Love and Enoch In Shin Town Having in mind the influence of former citizens of the land of the shamrock upon the political destinies of the town what more natural than that the printer man should set up an Irish district court where It had been the first district court Professor Frank Geeks was men tioned as hving rendered violent se lections rather than violin selec tions Somebody was quoted as saying that all the singing folks on the vaudeville stage have hundreds of wives but the copy when carefully examined was found to read husbands or wives and a sensation in the the atrical world was averted They sailed for three days around the cape aud finally slaughtered a small Italian was corrected to read sighted a small island On one occasion the reporter wrote of certain dwarfed and hungered chil dren who were made to appear per haps more pathetic when the composi tor substituted the words doorfed and haggard He takes delight in talking on his family shame was a shameful thing to say about him for favorite theme was meant I Red Cross Society Will Fight Cor bett was the way the typesetter trans formed the copy concerning a crusade against cholera AN HONEST ARTIST He Would Not Paint a Lie Even For a Napoleon There was no love lost between the Emperor Louis Napoleon and his cousin Prince Napoleon whom the Parisians called Plon Plon The prince used to make abusive speeches against the emperor which people were only too ready to repeat to him Let him alone Louis Napoleon would reply He is too well known No one would turn me out to place him on the throne The emperor was correct for no one said a good word about Plon Plon lie was commonly believed to have shown the white feather in the Crimea and never exposed himself where the lead was falling An English lady who in her younger days mingled with French society tells in her Foreign Courts and Foreign Homes a story as discreditable to Prince Napoleon as it is honorable to a French artist While the artist was painting the historical picture of the battle of the Alma which the emperor had ordered Prince Napoleon called at the painters studio to make known to him the facts On leaving he said he wished the prominent figure in the battle to be himself mounted on his white charger He sent the horse to the artist so that he could paint its exact portrait When the picture was finished and in vitations were sent out for a private view the white charger was seen a prominent figure in the battle but without a rider On hearing of this terrible omission the prince sent an aid-de-camp to ask the reason The honest artist said the horse should remain if the prince wished but no rider would be on it Tell the prince I have never yet painted a lie The hint was taken The prince ordered the horse to be rubbed out Fortunate Indeed Cook Taylor was always a fortunate man but doesnt it seem wonderful that his luck should stay with him to the very last Raleigh How was that Cook Why he was operated on for the removal of a pearl which he had accidentally swallowed while eating oysters and when the pearl was ex amined it was found to be valuable enough to pay for both the operation and the funeral Judge A Favored Fowl I has been told said Miss Miami Brown dat de parrot is one of de longes lived birds dat is De statement replied Mr Erasmus Pinkley is strictly ornithological I wonder why I specks dat one reason why de parrot lives so long is dat he aint good to eat Washington Star Giving Money The difficulty which is faced m America in connection with philan thropy Is not to find the people who have th money to give but to discover the ways In which money may be given wisely Ideas for wise giv ing are much scarcer than money awaiting opportunity Chicago Trib una County Commissioners Proceeding McCook Nohraskn July 10 1WX The board of county comiiiiioiior nmtp sunnt to adjournment sreent F S LofUxC H Irny nnd S Irrmr r county CoininIwtler r and Clin Sknlln county clerk The clerk ImviiiK adcrtil for tctilod Gln for the or bridtus in the county fciruV comliiK jenr nnd September Sntl tit 2 ar belnjf the tinio wt for the ttticiiJiiK Mild Aii the bonril proceeded to ojmti the bid t tfio The boanl found the bid of the Canton li air ComjHitiy of Omaha tho Western Contractor Supply Co of Oniiihu and the Standard lirlhyn Company of Oiiiaha on file aud on motion dm board accepted the bid of the Standard lliiic Co ns the lowest aud hot and contract onl ntS entered into with said company The following claims wore audited ntiljir lowed and the clerk wut intruded to fetxv warrants on the county Kenerid fund Imyilf 1108 as follows S Ireiuur services as coiiiiiiioiicr J ln KJ0riy Kfa Lofton jjiso On motion board adjourned to meet ber 15 HOS F S Lun on Chnteurju Attest Ciias Skalla Clerk NOTICE TO CKEDITOHJr In the county court of Ited Willow cowsry Nebraska In tho matter of the estate of Ota rnd ietiiiun deceased You are hereby notified that I will sitsim county court room in iloCook in -aid countouw the 20th ilny or ilareli U0t at nine oekrit a in to receive and examine all cluimaxiiifie mands against said estate with a view toirKar adjustment aud allowance The time lrotfiel for the presentation or claim- jicainst is six mouths Irom the lith day of Sm ber 1j0 and any claim not presented by C4C time shall be forever barred - Ov its - skaiI J C Muom County Juieu 1 K Kelley attorney LEGAL NOTICE In justice court before II if IVrryjutrMl the peace J II Iratt defendant will take uoticfl ali on the 3rd la or August lKte II II lSesrt justice of the teiicu of Ited Willow countyAH brasku isMied an order of attachment f - Mini of tfKt in an action pemhiu lieforoJiuu wherein ieoiKe S Hcott jIaintitl andXi Pratt is defendant and t tint property if tixs defendant consisting of inonej duo aud trtttx in the hands of the Chicago liurlinl Jn Quincy Huilroad Company riiishee iikw h for work aud labor performed ly said U4xt ant for said ICnilrond CimiiU has Ihhhc tached under said order of attht iunent iVuiii cause has been continued for hearing to tMZtau day of ireptembvr 1108 nt nine oclock juiiu k h 3ts Ufcoitos S Soocn NOTICE Notice i hereby Riven that on the 28th d n May 11MIS tho articles of incfrprntioii -of He Masonic Temple Craft or McCook NeliraAu were amended in the following Article Four thereof was aii uded to raitua follows The general nature of the to be transacted and the object t this shall be to purchase real estate in Nebraska upon which to erect a huildiiijr ti br known as a Masonic temple and to ftirnisA in said bmldiuK a room or rooms to he usniirc Masonic purposes and rooms for ollices jAjt and other purposes and to furnish said ava and storerooms and to construct ami erorr ha said building an opera house and to lease uvJ receive the rent of said building and anyasffi all parts of it and to operate and maiaruiei said opera house nnd to receive tho ictritn therefrom This corporation shall Inue rfci power to contract for and complete said ljjfd HiK to raise and borrow monej for aid pur poses by pledge ot its corporation proiierfjronr otherwise Article Five thereof was amended increMRg the capital stock to forty live thousand doicc Article Eicht thereof was amended to rcihins follows Tho board of directors of this cor poration shall declare dividends during the months of January and July or each year pro vided the surplus profits remaining atter tifc payment of all current liabilities of this cor poration are suflicient to pay the divideirki at least two aud one half percent and if at free times said profits are insuflicient to pay axJx dividends dividends shall bo declared lrjtix directors as soon as suilicient profits accumu late to pay such dividends no dividends fail be declared which will impair tho capitil g this company B SMZZZZZ MAhONK TKMILE Ciiatc seal of M Cook NcniiAam t Pr ZZ 8 Uy C L Fahnestock IrcsiAsnl Attest Lon Cone Secretary NOTICE OF SUIT Elizabeth Kilgore James V Kihsire Sarah Kilgore Florinda J liengic George L Berber Emma Hohnsjitu Arrillsi Vandervort Silas Vanderwsrc Marv Kimerling Marion Kimerling Ol iver P Whitted Margaret J WliiSfed James A Whitted Mrs James A Whic ted his wife Arthur EStone SarsA Jones Saniantba Potts and James P cfEt defendants will take that Gcgs E Evertson plaintiff herein has fik his petition against the abne namfed de fendants in the district court of Ike Willow county Nebraska the oojes and prayer of which are to quiet thet title of the plaintin in the East half uk the East half of the West half of Sec tion thirtv threo ITh Township three 3 Range twenty eight 2S Red Wiftiw county Nebraska and for i decree afesfc the defendants and each and all of tins be decreed to have no interest in orangr claim lien or title to said premisesusr any part thereof and that they may Ihs barred and excluded from making asjp claim thereto ZZ You are required to an Aver -aid jts tion on or before Mondav the 23ti4SHw of September 1908 ZZZ Dated this 21st day of August lSDt GeOHE E E FRTSO By Boyle it Eldked PlaintiaL his Attorneys Dr J A Golfer DENTIST Room 4 Postoffice Buildtac McCOOK NEBRASKA Farmers bring your waenti to the MILL 5 will pay ye a premium above the market for all gwiS milling wheat All Goods at Lowesf Possible Market Prices Whole Wheat Rye and Graham jJ ti oi - nt - iluuu oituiai jjines uu luia ui ten sacks or more uj5S SEMOLIA A fine breakfast food lira- excelled in 2 lb pack5i El All kinds of Mill Feed sBiH CornBarey Chop Bran Shorts efc Orders Promptly Delivered McCook Milling Company E H DOAN ProprietG Phone 29 McCOOK BEGGS BLOOD PURIFIES CURES catarrh of the stomach