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Have you ever tried an eraso ink
eraser See one at The Tribune of
fice
Secretary Wilson of the department
of agriculture says that the unbounded
prosperity of the agriculturist is not due
to chance but is the result of intelli
gent scientific business methods A
reader of The Weekly Inter Ocean has
placed before him each week the prac
tical and approved methods to which
Secretary Wilson refers It is a good
investment Only 125 for The Weekly
Inter Ocean and this paper one year
THE WORD QUACK
Ito Origin Traced Back to the Sixtconth
Century
The original ami acquired meanings
of many an old word have been clear
ed up in the law courts When quack
had its turn Sir Edward Clarke who
was probably quoting a dictionary de
fined the word as a boastful preteud
er to medical skill Quack Is un
doubtedly derived by suggestion from
the quacking of a duck The quack
doctor has always substituted volu
bility for knowledge Quacker and
quacking cheat were sixteenth cen
tury words Quack In Its present
sense Is certainly as old as 1G90 when
It was included in the earliest of our
slang dictionaries The original word
was quacksalver a traveling empiric
who quacked about his salves and
according to Ilcnley and Farmer the
dramatist Wycherly first shortened this
word to quack
The full term quack doctor is found
at least as early as 1710 when these
words were used as a title to the Earl
of Rochesters mountebank speech on
Tower hill This witty and ofligate
nobleman he is always called witty
and profligate took it Into bis head to
disappear from his friends and appear
to the mobon Tower hill as a quack
doctor The speech he made on that
occasion has been preserved and it
shows that quack oratory has gained
nothing since
It Is not all printable in these polite
pages but the following passage will
show its character
The cures I have done are as in
credible as innumerable IcuredPrester
Johns godmother of a stupendous dolor
in her os sacrum which had like to
cost the good lady the perdition of her
buckle bone I curd the Empress of
Boolmapo of a cramp she got in her
tongue by eating pork and butterd
parsnips I curd an alderman of
Grand Cairo of a scarlet burning rag
ing fever of which he dyd I curd
the Emperor of Morocco who lay sev
en years sick of the plague I curd
him in forty two minutes so that he
daned the serabrand flipfiap and Som
erset to the admiration of his whole
court For my pains he presented me
with G000 Hungarian ducats and a
Turkish cymeter Verbum sat sapient
No cure no money
I doubt very much whether Sir Ed
ward Clarke was right in saying that
the word quack was revived by
Carlyle after It had died out So use
ful a word Is not likely to have been
dropped though in Carlyles vocabu
lary of denunciation it certainly took
on a new importance It was from a
court of law by the way that Carlyle
obtained the word gig which witb
ferocious glee he never ceased to use
as a symbol of smug respectability
The trial of Thurtell at Hertford as
sizes for the murder of Mr Weare pro
duced the following dialogue
What sort of person was Mr
Weare
He was always a most respectable
person
What do you mean by respectable
He kept a gig
Carlyles sardonic humor seized on
this and ever after when he was
storming at respectabilities and unreal
ities gigs were not far from his
mind He even applied the word gig
manity to those classes of society
which held the gig ideal John
OLondon in London Tatler
The Arabs Pride of Blood
Of the Arabs pride a traveler writes
He is proud of his own blood and of
his mares blood for its own sake He
will show you a broken down little
crock and inform you with perfect
truth that she is of the best blood in
the Jazirah he will also show a fine
stallion of bis own and tell you he is a
gdish or underbred animal and there
is no doubt it is the bad thoroughbred
he admires and prefers to the finest
made cross breed As regards his
shaykh and tribal leader he discrimi
nates in an equal degree between the
clever warrior astute diplomatist and
good business man of low extraction
and the shaykh of high lineage who
may be a miserable epileptical crea
ture and always to the disadvantage
of the low born man
Where He Would Have Shone
Cardinal Mezzofauti who died in
1S49 at the age of seventy five years
knew and could speak more than fifty
languages And he knew them thor
oughly He could entertain his English
friends with specimens of Yorkshire
dialect and his French or German vis
itors with the patois of their respec
tive countries What a fine job he
could have had as a universal interpret
er should he have lived in the times
of the tower of Babel was one of
Lord Byrons caustic remarks Argo
naut
A New Leaf
Ive just been thinking said Wil
Iieboy
Thinking what demanded Silli
man to whom the idea of Willieboys
thinking was somewhat disconcerting
That in Adams case it must have
been a real re leaf to change his
clothes said Willieboy Harpers
Weekly
For Ones Own Comfort
Half the sting of poverty or small
means is gone when one keeps house
for ones own comfort and not for the
comment of ones neighbors Dinah
Maria Mulock
Fooling the Cook
Your cook is telling that your bus
land gets a very small salary
We just tell her that to keep her
rom demanding a large one Hous
ton Post
Each man judges things by his own
conditions No sunrise looks alike to
ny two men Manchester Union
About Some
People In Print
Thomas E Watson and His Lunch With the
President Bostons New Mayor
Rudyard Kiplings Honors
fHyFL
jO
jK Au -
JmgSZJ
T JDYARD KLPISSQ
h o m a s e
WATSON
former Popu
list candidate for
president after
taking lunch with
Mr Roosevelt at
the White House
recently declared
I should say that
what Impressed
me most Is Presi
d e n t Roosevelts
thomas e watsojt sincerity earnest
ness and breadth of human sympathy
Mr Watson gave the president his
ideas on the subject of needed amend
ment of the currency laws and In re
spect to recent conflicts between the
authority of state and federal courts
He is a man who has found time in
the course of his career to teach school
practice law write historical works
edit magazines and lecture in addi
tion to such political activity as led to
his nomination by the Populists for
president He is a man of consider
able property now though in early
life he had a hard struggle Speaking
of those years he once said
The first year of my law practice
yielded me 212 gross In the second
year I bought back one of the old
home places that had belonged to our
family and removed my father and
mother and younger brothers and sis
ters back to It having bought the en
tire property on credit and I lived
with them walking three miles to my
office every morning and carrying my
dinner In the schoolboy tin bucket and
returning to the farm at night In
that second year I made 474 Of
course the money which I owed for
board during the first year was re
turned out of the first surplus that I
could make The third year I again
doubled my income and from that
time my practice rapidly Increased
until the annual income from it reach
ed 12000
George A Hibbard who recently
won the mayoralty of Boston is a Re
publican and his victory was won over
John F Fitzgerald the present mayor
and the Democratic candidate and
also over the candidate of the Inde
pendence league John A Coulthurst
Ma 3 or Fitzgerald
has hitherto sus
tained a reputation
as a man who nev
er got defeated
The mayor elect
was born in 1SG4
and educated in
the Boston public
schools He en
gaged in business
and gradually got
into politics serv
ing on his ward
committee going to
the state legisla
ture being chosen george a hibbard
as delegate to the national convention
of his party in 1S96 and serving in
various other places of trust in the
party organization In 1S95 he was a
candidate for state treasurer in the
caucus of the Republican members of
the legislature and was defeated by
one vote He made a good record as
postmaster of Boston and is now pro
moted from that office to the mayoral
ty of the Hub
It was only last year that the Nobel
peace prize was awarded to President
Roosevelt and now another of the No
bel prizes that for attainments in
physics has been given to an Amer
ican Professor Albert A Michelson of
the University of Chicago By the pro
visions of the will of Alfred Nobel five
prizes are awarded each year for the
most important discoveries in physics
in chemistry in physiology or medi
cine for the most distinguished work
of an idealistic tendency in the field of
literature and for the best effort toward
the fraternity of the nations and the
promotion of peace The prize in lit
erature was this year awarded to Rud
yard Kipling who married an Amer
ican has been much in this country
and seems in many respects almost an
American
Like the typical American Mr Kip
ling Is usually ready with a retort On
one visit to this
country he dined
with a party which
included several
other well known
writers a fair pro
portion of men and
women who knew
something about lit
erature as well as
a large number who
knew little making
up for their lack of
knowledge by pre
tense Several of
the last started a useless discussion
concerning pronunciations synonyms
antonyms etc and apropos of nothing
at all that had been said one firing
his remark straight at Kipling as be
ing the lion of the evening said
I find that sugar and sumac are
the only words beginning with su
that are pronounced as though begin
ning with shu
Bored though he was Kiplings po
liteness did not desert him and as
suming an expression of interest
though his eyes twinkled behind his
glasses he replied
Are you sure
SPURIOUS ANTIQUES
Many Forgeries Clever Enough to De
ceive the Experts
In the manufacture of antiquities the
forger shows an ingenuity that is un
limited Furniture prints china pic
tures plate armor Ivory bronze
tapestry all are most successfully imi
tated Many such Imitations are It
is true clumsy enough but a great
many deceive even the Initiated The
experts of national museums have been
imposed upon more than once
The British museum bought a Palis
sy plate for 230 Whiie an attendant
was handling it one of the seals at
tached to its back attesting its genu
ineness became detached disclosing
the mark of a modern French potter
Terra cotta figures of Isis and Osiris
bought by the same Institution for
thousands of dollars were discovered
to be composed of modern clay There
is one forger of antiquities whose spe
cialty is old leather jacks another pro
duces horn books still another turns
out mediaeval manuscripts a fourth
clerical vestments of the middle ages
and so on
An expert of the Smithsonian insti
tution was called upon not long ago to
pass upon a specimen of a mummy
servant an effigy in a plastic material
such as the Egyptians buried with
their dead Close examination proved
it to be made of putty It was a very
clever forgery
Count Tyskiewiez a noted judge and
collector of antiquities gives some In
teresting details of the forgeries that
have been attempted from the earliest
times No metal lent itself so easily
to this work as gold Etruscan jewelry
has been largely manufactured in
Italy but Syria has carried on the
most extensive forgery of gold works
of art Forgeries in silver have been
less successful
A good story is told of a forged sil
ver cup in Rome that purported to
have come from some secret excava
tion in Sicily This ancient cup was
ornamented with a circular bas relief
representing the frieze of the Parthe
non In the height of his innocence the
forger had given the frieze in its pres
ent ruined condition The cup obtained
an immediate success shouts of laugh
ter St Louis Republic
CORNMEAL
Varied Joys of This Rich and Ver
satile Product
But cornmeal is such a rich and
versatile product that it lends itself
to all days and all meals For break
fast it can be turned into batter cakes
light and luscious or into waffles that
melt in ones mouth or Into muffins
which take on new sweetness in their
tin boundaries or you can have your
corn in the shape of grits yellow with
butter and of happy digestibility
Then for dinner there is the corn
pone large brown and hot from the
oven ready to be seasoned with a
sauce of butter and washed down with
freshly churned buttermilk with an
accompaniment of cabbage or collards
or turnip salad or new snap beans If
for any reason the corn pone is not de
sirable though the farmer cannot im
agine anything that can take its place
Avith a healthy and an expectant appe
tite there are the dumplings to fall
back on the dumplings boiled with a
mess of greens This dish is a time
and space saver and there is also a
butter saver The dumplings should
never by any chance be allowed to
grow cold before serving For supper
there is the hoecake which should be
of a generous thickness and it should
be eaten with gravy distilled from the
juices of a country cured ham or if
you please a dish of mush and milk
And then the days work being over
and done with the tired man or wom
an and the children weary with play
may fall on their couches and forget
in sweet and dreamless slumber the
grisly troubles of the world Joel
Chandler Harris in Uncle Remus Mag
azine
An Oversight
When Chappie got up the other
morning he wandered around his
apartments in his pretty pink paja
mas the very picture of woe
Whats the matter fir inquired
his valet
I dont know AlphonFo hi groan
ed I passed a most uuhappv uicrlit
Alphonse looked hrn over rai of silly
Oh sir ho cxclaimc I know
what was the Tin tr orie
of your pJafi o ic --v-You
must be ioro r refill ii li
I had prepared for you v uv hig -
across tho fov r t Boho
mian
Her CorrpIr eni
It is the aim of Ut IIiII xo compli
ment her friend oi o ivy possible oc
casion yet stvg to say she doo
not always pleaso thiii
Did you like my unwn at tho re
ception tho otlv otuiig asked an
acquaint to and Mir Hal was
ready wis1 ho lc riig suile
My uo ir k with a cordial
pressure or tho hid it ws i drcim
You locked lovely I said to my hus
band Is thut n t cait bo and
then I saw it was But do you know
I scarcely recognized you
Clever Woman
She Dont you think a woman is
clever enough to do any work that a
man can ne Shes smarter than
that Wliy shes clever enough to
make the man do the work and give
her the benefit of it London Tele
graph
Not Lazy
And you say the public can be sep
arated from its money
Without effort
Oh I am perfectly willing to ex
pend some effort providing the trick
can be done Washington Herald
m
V J3S rfy8C
IflDIANOLA
Archibald Mann qi ito sick
Lagrippe is very fashionable among
our pecploat tho presont time
Harry Wyrick drove up from Bartley
Saturday evening to attond tho cntor
tninmont at the hall
Allen P Day and wife havo gono to
California to spend tho winter and visit
relatives
The fourth sorios of tho lecture courso
was givon Saturday evening at Shorts
opera house
Charles Kohl and Miss Eoberts wero
married Tuesday evening at tho Cathol
ic church Father Kolley officiating
Quick and King shippod four cars of
cattle and one of hogs to KariHas City
Sunday
Elba Ilotzo shipped two car of cattlo
to some eastern market first of tho
week
William Plourd went to Lincoln a
few days ago to attend the Horse Racers
Association of which ho is a member
Teel Co are enlarging and other
wise improving tho interior of their
millinery store
Protracted meetings are in progress
at the Methodist church and a lively
interest is manifested Rev Woodson
of Ravenna is present at each mo bting
and speaks with an eloquence born of
his acquaintance with the holy scrip
ture
Leonard Hethcote is out again after
a severe tussle with the grip which kept
him conGned to his home for a few days
Miss Pearl Lyman of Bartley was a
guest in the Elmer Thompson home
this week
Marion Powell is in town thi9 week
attending to the shipment of some
stock
Leonard Smith is in Grand Island on
a business pleasure trip
Mrs John Crocker died Wednesday
morning at her home eight miles north
of town Her disease was pneumonia
Butler Jones president of the Jones
farm company limited shipped a car
load of thoroughbred hogs to St Joe
Tuesday night
The health inspector made a visit to
Bartley Tuesday the result of which
wasi the quarantining of several families
on account of smallpox
A young son of Mr Theobald living
in Bartley died of smallpox Tuesday
morning
Mrs Tom Haley is expecting her fath
er on a visit soon He lives in South
Dakota
Mrs Orobel Walker and little sou
have returned to their home in Coving
ton Oklahoma Master Bennie Smith
accompanied them home for a visit
Mrs Lytle and children of Box Elder
are visiting in Alma this week
Newton Smith who has been suffer
ing from some malady of the mind has
concluded to try the Springs in Arkan
sas as a relief for his trouble
John Harrison senior has gone out of
the livery business
Wm ODaniel has gone to Edison to
visit a sister Prom there he will go to
Wyoming in the near future
Miss Helen King went down o Cam
bridge Tuesday morning and spent
the day
Pack Keegan and Jake Oherman
were visitors in the Standpipe city
Tuesday
DANBURY
Mr Kendall and wife have gone to
Iowa on a visit with her brother and
other friends
We understand Miss Alta Morgan
will teach the Hamburg school
The basket supper at the hall was a
success Some fine music and drill by
the Sunday school was excellent
K
gffjyijipipwipww
G B Morgan wife and daughtor
Alta and son Donald with Sam Graham
and Harloy Woods -have returned after
having spent a pleasant threo monttiB
in Los Angolos Calif Mr and Mrs
McGuiro stopped over to visit relatives
at Ln Junta Colorado
John Evers who was horn on business
and visiting old friends and relatives
has returned to his homo in Valparaiso
Howard Ruby of Kanotm has beon
under the doctors enro for somo time
but is roported improving f
Mrs Maggie Wicks who has beon
visiting her parents Mr and Mrs Joe
Dolph of this place returned to her
home in Omaha this week
Mrs Noo has been over to see her
father who is in very poor hoalth
Mrs Dora Huthcoto and daughtor
Cecil aro both down with the grippo
Mr Olmsteads moved into tho Gra
ham residence vacated by McMullon
who moves into the Davo Boyer house
Al Boyers family after a fciego of the
grippe are able to bo around again
W A Stono was a visitor to Beavor
City last week
U F D No 1
A brother of G C Smith arrived
last thursday and may remain here
during the coming summer
Miss Junio Waters was at tho home
of Nelson Downs over Sunday on a
visit
W N Rogers had a great loss last
week Wednesday in tho death of his
famous prize and sweepstake winner
Beau Donald Death was caused by
pneumonia
John Hume has been very sick but is
improving
Jacob Fiechtner accompunied Honry
Rogers to Denver with the show herd
week W N Rogers went up
Sunday
Carl Schlutsmeior is framing a fino
new home
Mrs William Stadler of Minden and
MrsJacob Harsch of School Creek wore
at the old borne during the sale at
Joseph Downs this week
The Mutual Telephone Co is putting
in a number of new phones
RED WILLOW
Mrs Will Myers and Alta Helm were
callers at Louis Longneckers Sunday
Even the bravest women are nervous
about being left alone on the farm and
think that all tramps and hobos should
be severely dealt with
Mrs Taylor and son Horace and Mr
Smiths family attended the Odd Fel
low and Veteran supper at Indianola on
Tuesday evening
Wm Randel and wife and others at
tended the banquet at Indianola on
Monday evening
A little son came to Owens Longneck
ers new house on Tuesday and expects
to live with them
A weekly newspaper that publishes
twenty oue columns of good reliable
news each week is rare in these days of
cheap weeklies intended only to sell
some article that the publisher is inter
ested in Credit is due The Weekly
Inter Ocean for keeping its columns
filled with fresh and up-to-date news
Give it a trial by subscribing through
The McCook Tribune
Typewriter lor Sale
If you are interested in securing a
Smith Premer Typewriter in splendid
condition at half price call in The Tri
bune office and see the machine It is
a bargain and will be sold because the
owner has two machines
A G Bump room two over McCon
nells drug store is agent for some of
Americas best insurance companies
Consult him
FENNEY WALKER
GENERAL CONTRACTING PAINTERS AND DECORATORS
Not How Cheap but How Good with Us
Office and Shop west of First national Bank
Steel Ceilings Sold Put Up and Decorated
r
Make jour friend a present of some
Monogram
Stationery
We have an excellent line of samples from
which you can choose embossed in one
or two colors or in bronze or gold any
letters or combination of letters Call and
see samples of the monograms and stock
The TRIBUNE Office
J
i