fjft gfcCwk frikp By F M KIMMELL Largest Circulation in Red Willow Co Subscription 1 a Year in Advance Cruelly Blunt The minister who atlends to the spiritual wants of a country parish In Scotland Is not much of a preacher and In other ways is Inefficient One by one his elders left him and joined other churches in the neighborhood As he saw the number diminishing he felt that It would soon be necessary to appoint men to take their places In the eldership The time came at length when he had to moye in the matter lie took the beadle into his conQdence lie was sure If anybody could assist him In his difficulty it was that functionary John he said to him one Sabbath after service I want you to assist me In getting up a list of new elders You are well acquainted with the parish and remember I will have none but thoroughly good men You know the very snuffers for the candles In the great temple of Jerusalem were made of pure gold Well sir returned the beadle that may be but to tell the truth I see little use o huntln through the parish for golden snuffers as lang as we have only a brass candlestick Glasgow Times She Give you a latchkey Never He But wifey just think how the fellows will make fun of me and abuse you She reflecting Yes thats so Well you can have this room key and then you can tell thorn you took it by mistake for the house key Fliegende Blatter Dr Beach is practicing agai n Office at residence same old place Telephone i26dozen and a half BEGGS CHERRY COUGH SYRUP Cures BRONCHITIS Fred Wiggins Auctioneer 1000 All dates made 9 6 tf ii mi iiii mi nlMiTTiiinrr Will cry your sale any time anywhere Bills posted in the Sappy country Tin cupsfurnlshd for your free lunch without extra charge Terms 10 for first 1000 or less 1 per ct on all sales running over by The Danbury News BEGGS CHERRY COUGH JRUP Cures BRONCHTISi Rev Merrill B Carman at the flethodist Church AT 815 OCLOCK Monday September 9th i I -- and Friday September 13th These lectures are given for the benefit of the church debt and every cant will be turned into that fund We need 400 yet to free our church of debt by September 15 Come out and help us and hear two good lectures Rev Carman has delivered one of these lectures at fifteen different place this summer and has always pleased Tho lecture at the M E church last evening was a medley a real mince pie every part select well chosen nicely prepared and delightfully appetizing to the appreciative audience that greeted Rev M B Carman as for nearly two hours ho without gloves dwelt upon the follies and foi bles of modern life in the rearing of -our boys and girls Brother Carman is an epitomized steam engine possessed of far more than ordinary forensic force and ability whose keen trenchant and well rounded epigramatic sentences bring him at once in full touch with thinking people imbued with right ideas concerning the responsibilities of life Everybody should hear him Curtis Courier May 31 1907 Tickets on Sale at McConnelFs Both Lectures 50c One Lecture 35c Children 35c Children 20c BAftsSteS The Triumph of Yh Tho total number of those fho per ished In tho slego and capture of Jeru salem Is estimated by JosepKs at 1100000 persons 07000 were taken captive by the Romans Of these 700 of tho finest and strongest were select ed to grace the triumphal procession of Titus The old and tho weak who could not bo used the Romans had butchered in cold blood Those over seventeen years of age were part of them sent Into the Egyptian mines part of them forced to appear in bat tle with wild beasts and be torn to pieces by them or to fight as gladiators with ono another to delight tho eyes of the heathen populace In Caesarea Phlllppi alone at the celebration of the birthday of Domltian more than 2500 Jews shed their blood in the arena Tho males under seventeen years of age and the women were sold directly into slavery Titus with all his prisoners and all his booty marched to Rome where ho had a bril liant triumph In the year 71 A D The sacred vessels of the temple were carried before the Imperator and Simon and John for the first time shoulder to shoulder were obliged to march before the chariot of tho victor with the 700 chosen captives Simon being the real leader was first scourged and then throttled at the stake in ac cordance with Roman custom John finished his career In prison A- Magnolia Elysium When good Chaiiestonians die their bodies it is said go to Magnolia ceme tery and their souls to the Magnolia gardens Indeed It were quite ex cusable In a wandering spirit if chancing on these gardens when azaleas were in their radiant perfec tion he should mistake the place for Elysium especially If looking for such a gardenlike Elysium as Derricks Although widely known and visited yearly by hundreds Magnolia is not a public garden but a noble old estate on the Ashley river belonging now as It has belonged for 200 years to the Drayton family of South Carolina Very much as the folk of Tokyo go out to worship the beauty of the cher ry blossoms so in March and April Charleston people and any strangers fortunate enough to be within their gates make a pilgrimage to Magnolia During the season the little steamer plies between Charleston and Mag nolia making the trip twice daily Francis Duncan In Century hforse Sense Mr dont want this horse He hasnt any nense at all Every time he sees an automobile he wants to climb a tree Dealer Well thats good horsa sense It seems to me Chi cago News Suited to His Business Gracious exclaimed the kind old lady to the beggar are they the best shoes youve got Why lady replied the candid beg gar could yer Imagine better ones fur dls blzness Every one o dem holes means nickels an dimes ter me Philadelphia Press Quite a Difference Tommy when I tell you something Is wrong you do not do It No sir But when your conscience tells you a thing Is wrong you keep right on and do It Yes sir But doesnt your conscience hurt you when you do something wrong Yes sir but not in the same place you do Houston Post Boys and Girls Down East TWO POPULAR LECTURES BY 153SSjiijTiiij in my i p UKhXmJJXItUJJiliBJJ U J MOVEMENT 0b 1HE PEOPLE VinoiL Williams ia homo from Mor rill Nebraska Mrs and Miss Hark wore Lincoln visitors closo of last week Merlin Bros have returned to their home in Sioux City Iowa RIis3 Loretta Kkating of Denver is in tho city on a brief visit Mr and Mrs M U Clyde arrived homo Tuesday from Hot Springs Mrs C A Fisher arrived home first of tho week from her trip west Mrs Charles A Johnson of Leban on was a county seat visitor last week Miss Minnie Pade was in Hastings Thursday between trains on business Louis Fleishman returned closo of last week from an outing of two weeks in tho mountains Dorthy Carman is afflicted and iso loted with scarlet fever but tho disease is progressing favorably Mrs F E Kennedy and family are down from Sheridan Wyoming guests of her mother Mrs Mary Mullen Jules Merle went in to OmahaMon day to have his eyes treated being troubled with cataract formation Mrs W G Dcjtton left this morn ing to attend the national encampment G A R at Saratoga Now York Mrs J F Forres and tho family ar rived home last Saturday from their outing of a couple of weeks in the west Mr and Mrs J E Tirrill arrived home Monday night from spending several weeks with friends in Boulder Colo Mrs T B Campbell returned home last Friday from spending two weeks with her daughter Mrs E J Kates in Plattsmouth C M Bolles of Morton Park Illi nois returned close of last week to Red Willow county and will try farming hern for a season Mrs J M Brady Miss Jennie and Frank departed Monday night for St Paul Minn where they will visit Mrs Bradys brother for a couple weeks Mrs E M Day Mrs Oscar Grismore and children arrived home Thursday morning on 2 from their visit to a son and brother in Salt Lake City Utah Miss Claudia B Hatcher was up from Indianola Saturday Miss Hat cher will be one of the nominees for superintendent of public instruction this fall Mr and Mrs A R Mehaffey of Pittsburg Pa arrived in the city first of the week and expect to make their home here She is a sister of Mrs T B Campbell Mrs Adele Phelan Miss Viva and Master Tom arrived home early m the week from their Tolland Colorado outing and camping having sojourned briefly in Denver en route home Mr and Mrs A P Thompson of Omaha were in the city Monday brief ly between trains on their way home to Omaha after spending several weeks with the Marslands in Washington Mr and Mrs William Hiersekorn of Lebanon preeinct attended the state fair assisting in the Red Willow county exhibit He had with him a fine sample of wheat which weighed 61 pounds to the bushel Mr and Mrs C D Noble and Mrs Maggie B Jeffries arrived home Sun day morning from a delightful trip to Salt Lake City Utah taking in the Grand Canyon and other glories of the Colorado Utah country M W Eikenberry and son Loran of Kokomo Indiana arrived in tho city Wednesday on No 1 and are guests of his brother Daniel of this place M W was recently elected county clerk of Howard county Indiana Mrs A Backstrom was up from Lin coln close of last week making prepa rations to return to McCook in time to start the children to school Seplembpr 16th They have been spending the summer in Lincoln with relatives Steve Wilson arrived home from a long absence in Kansas close of last week He was in search of a long lost span of livery horses which he succeed ed in recovering while absent He sold the team at a good figure while away R F D No 1 Miss Ada Walkington of Cambridge commenced school in the North Star district on Monday Frank Dudek and family returned Tuesday from their visit in Colorado Miss Geneva Fitch opened school in Prospect Park district Monday Leon Rogers and John Crocker went down to the state fair Wednesday morning Mis3 Freda Mette commenced teach ing in the John Hammel district Mon day Miss Margaret Evans has two young lady guests the Misses Anderson Mr and Mrs G F Randel have been entertaining some guests from Colorado part of the week W N Rogers expects to go from the state fair at Lincoln to Spokane Wash to hunt bear like Teddy The weeds about the mail boxes should be cut down In some places they are so high the carriers cannot seethe boxes and signals r fiXVl a I 5K fc ARTIFICIAL PEARLS What a Little Silver Fish TaugrA French Beadmaker Ill tell you said a jeweler hvS the wonderfully perfect artificial peart came to be invented A rich French beadmaker Moise JnquLn he lived in the seventeenth century found a pond In his garden covered one morning with a lovely slV very luster Amazed he called lib gardener who said it was nothing some albettes had got crushed that waii all Albettes were little silver fish bleaks tho Leuciscus alournus The gardener explained that if you crushed them they always gave the water a pearly sheen like that Jaquiu put on his thinking cap For six years he worked with beada and bleaks wasting millions of both but finally he achieved success He learned how to extract the pearly lus ter from the bleaks scales and to cov er a glass bead with it What he did and his method is still used was to scrape the scales from the fish wash and rub them and save the water The water decanted gave off a lustrous fluid of the thickness of oil a veritable pearl paint a magic fluid that imparts a lovely pearly sheen to everything it is applied to It takes 1000 bleaks to yield an ounce of this pearl paint New Or leans Times Democrat CIRCUS RIDERS They Earn Good Salaries but Their Careers Are Short A man horseback rider receives from 75 to 123 a week and his career as a principal rider lasts about ten years It Is short not so much because these men get stiff and lose their agility as be cause they lose their nerve Nearly all circus folk marry young and with their added responsibilities comes a lively sense of danger which they ignored in younger days A man rider who can not turn a somersault on a horse can not command more than 50 a week A woman rider who can perform this feat gets from 150 to 200 a week if she is a finished rider This isnt much when all the disad vantages of the calling are taken into consideration but it should be remem bered that all the expenses are paid Including the care feeding and of course the transportation of their horses All they have to provide Is their own clothing For the men riders clothes do not constitute much of a factor and the women nearly always make their own except those provided by the management French Rags High Priced A collector of rags offered the man ager of a large boarding house a cer tain price for a bag of wornout lirien These rags are worth more than that said the shrewd landlord I run several houses In this neighbor hood and all are occupied exclusively by French guests The dealer apparently considered that remark sufficiently explanatory He cast a hasty glance upon the con tents of the bag then raised the price And he could well afford to raise it too sard the landlord Even at that rate he will make money off the things French rags the world over bring a higher price than any other The rea son why French people wear a bet ter quality of linen and their castoff garments are In demand by all manu facturers of high grade paper New York Press The Congregation Smiled Two country clergymen had agreed to exchange pulpits on a certain date One of them made the following sol emn announcement to his congregation on the Sabbath previous to the event My dear brethren and sisters I have the pleasure of stating that on next Sunday morning the Rev Zachariah B Day will preach for you Let us now sing two verses of hymn No 4S9 That Awful Day Will Surely Come And It took him some time to discov er why the congregation smiled The First Boat At first when a man wanted to cross a deep stream he was compelled to swim across But man at best is a poor swimmer and it was not long be fore he invented a better method of traveling on water A log drifting in a stream furnished the hint By resting his body upon the log and plashing J with his hands and feet he found he could move along faster and easier Thus the log was the first boat and the human arm was the first oar S E Forman in St Nicholas Vitty Women Women have more wit than humor They are more sensitive than men Their minds are nimbler Their thoughts Hash instantly to an intuitive conclusion hence wit is far more nat ural to them They have hardly tho intellectual patience to create or enjoy the less obvious and more deliberate moods of humor Munseys Magazine A Failure So you dont believe in the mind cure No Did you ever try it Well I once tried to convince my wife that she didnt really want a new gown Judge Looks That Way I wonder if Mars really Is inhabit ed Dont know but if Saturn is Ill bet the politicians own it Think so Certainly cant you see the rings Philadelphia Press A concoaled spark is more to U eared than an open fire German Proverb P imm i aomm a im a SS9SSVl School Dresses School Hats School Caps School Tams vvwv Now Is the Time To get the girls ready Clapps Is the Place to buy their outfits There you will find the best assortment and the biggest values in Dry Goods Ladies and Misses Furnishings Armor Plate Hose are all guaranteed to give satisfaction Fay Stockings give the best satisfaction for children Ask to see our Undermuslins for children they are cheap er than you can make them An Extraordinary Purchase of Ribbons Has just been received and we are putting them on sale at per yard The regular 40c and 50c values all colors in stripes and plaids v H C Clapp Exclusive Dry Goods We would be pleased to have you call and give us a trial THE BIG LOAF FOR 5 CENTS Ask your grocer for Merles Bread 25c AAAAAiVSVS Ladies Furnishings Walsh Block McCook Nebraska Telephone S6 iw THE TRIBUNE Office for Office Supplies MERLES BAKERY Bra Between Suttons and McConnells m mmmasBmmm Fresh Bread Daily WHITE GRAHAM and RYE BREAD BUNS LAYER CAKES COOKIES ANGEL FOODS CINNAMON ROLLS COCOANUT KISSES AND PIES 1 Pfc HL 3g r L Sj J ym x vALi XHEr OXHERl DjSjuS fe 1907SPTMBE107 Xf J 1 Ii 5UNI M01lTUE5jWEDTHgg5J FRI 5AT SU I IP SiSJlNL 5UNM0MTUE5JweDtH1IKFRI I JAT I Wia Comic Automobile Parade- f iXJVillisTOPVB Pl - TUESDAY NIGHT OCT 11 A AlSwfcj 1 ItelltllPIixTASl Grand Electrical Parade- ilk rLrM BSI V ALr WEDNESDAY NIGHT OCT 2Y P VLl VVvMI W0 Ladies Float- Parade- XL -v K THURSDAY AFTERNOON OCT 3 WixWzr Coronation and Grand Bail- pXV W I CZr FRIDAY NIGHT OCT 4 l ff I CARNIVAL DAYS I I Ar IVf JEk Tfraj l I teMWHBgSW5Jii GiSSWfW rill Mi i I n i i i i Jmi M S -1