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By F M KIMMELL
Largest Circulation in Red Willow Co
Subscription 1 a Year in Advance
Cruelly Blunt
The minister who atlends to the
spiritual wants of a country parish
In Scotland Is not much of a preacher
and In other ways is Inefficient One
by one his elders left him and joined
other churches in the neighborhood
As he saw the number diminishing he
felt that It would soon be necessary
to appoint men to take their places In
the eldership The time came at
length when he had to moye in the
matter lie took the beadle into his
conQdence lie was sure If anybody
could assist him In his difficulty it was
that functionary
John he said to him one Sabbath
after service I want you to assist me
In getting up a list of new elders You
are well acquainted with the parish
and remember I will have none but
thoroughly good men You know the
very snuffers for the candles In the
great temple of Jerusalem were made
of pure gold
Well sir returned the beadle that
may be but to tell the truth I see
little use o huntln through the parish
for golden snuffers as lang as we have
only a brass candlestick Glasgow
Times
She Give you a latchkey Never
He But wifey just think how the
fellows will make fun of me and abuse
you She reflecting Yes thats so
Well you can have this room key and
then you can tell thorn you took it by
mistake for the house key Fliegende
Blatter
Dr Beach is practicing
agai n Office at residence
same old place Telephone
i26dozen and a half
BEGGS CHERRY COUGH
SYRUP Cures BRONCHITIS
Fred Wiggins
Auctioneer
1000 All dates made
9 6 tf
ii mi iiii mi nlMiTTiiinrr
Will cry your
sale any time
anywhere
Bills posted
in the Sappy
country Tin
cupsfurnlshd
for your free
lunch without
extra charge
Terms 10
for first 1000
or less 1 per
ct on all sales
running over
by
The Danbury News
BEGGS CHERRY COUGH
JRUP Cures BRONCHTISi
Rev Merrill B Carman
at the flethodist Church
AT 815 OCLOCK
Monday September 9th
i
I --
and
Friday September 13th
These lectures are given for the benefit of the church debt and
every cant will be turned into that fund We need 400 yet to free our
church of debt by September 15 Come out and help us and hear two
good lectures Rev Carman has delivered one of these lectures at fifteen
different place this summer and has always pleased
Tho lecture at the M E church last evening was a medley a real
mince pie every part select well chosen nicely prepared and delightfully
appetizing to the appreciative audience that greeted Rev M B Carman
as for nearly two hours ho without gloves dwelt upon the follies and foi
bles of modern life in the rearing of -our boys and girls Brother Carman
is an epitomized steam engine possessed of far more than ordinary forensic
force and ability whose keen trenchant and well rounded epigramatic
sentences bring him at once in full touch with thinking people imbued
with right ideas concerning the responsibilities of life Everybody should
hear him Curtis Courier May 31 1907
Tickets on Sale at McConnelFs
Both Lectures 50c
One Lecture 35c
Children 35c
Children 20c
BAftsSteS
The Triumph of Yh
Tho total number of those fho per
ished In tho slego and capture of Jeru
salem Is estimated by JosepKs at
1100000 persons 07000 were taken
captive by the Romans Of these 700
of tho finest and strongest were select
ed to grace the triumphal procession
of Titus The old and tho weak who
could not bo used the Romans had
butchered in cold blood Those over
seventeen years of age were part of
them sent Into the Egyptian mines
part of them forced to appear in bat
tle with wild beasts and be torn to
pieces by them or to fight as gladiators
with ono another to delight tho eyes
of the heathen populace In Caesarea
Phlllppi alone at the celebration of
the birthday of Domltian more than
2500 Jews shed their blood in the
arena Tho males under seventeen
years of age and the women were
sold directly into slavery Titus with
all his prisoners and all his booty
marched to Rome where ho had a bril
liant triumph In the year 71 A D
The sacred vessels of the temple were
carried before the Imperator and
Simon and John for the first time
shoulder to shoulder were obliged to
march before the chariot of tho victor
with the 700 chosen captives Simon
being the real leader was first scourged
and then throttled at the stake in ac
cordance with Roman custom John
finished his career In prison
A- Magnolia Elysium
When good Chaiiestonians die their
bodies it is said go to Magnolia ceme
tery and their souls to the Magnolia
gardens Indeed It were quite ex
cusable In a wandering spirit if
chancing on these gardens when
azaleas were in their radiant perfec
tion he should mistake the place for
Elysium especially If looking for such
a gardenlike Elysium as Derricks
Although widely known and visited
yearly by hundreds Magnolia is not
a public garden but a noble old estate
on the Ashley river belonging now
as It has belonged for 200 years to the
Drayton family of South Carolina
Very much as the folk of Tokyo go
out to worship the beauty of the cher
ry blossoms so in March and April
Charleston people and any strangers
fortunate enough to be within their
gates make a pilgrimage to Magnolia
During the season the little steamer
plies between Charleston and Mag
nolia making the trip twice daily
Francis Duncan In Century
hforse Sense
Mr dont want this horse
He hasnt any nense at all Every time
he sees an automobile he wants to
climb a tree Dealer Well thats
good horsa sense It seems to me Chi
cago News
Suited to His Business
Gracious exclaimed the kind old
lady to the beggar are they the best
shoes youve got
Why lady replied the candid beg
gar could yer Imagine better ones
fur dls blzness Every one o dem
holes means nickels an dimes ter me
Philadelphia Press
Quite a Difference
Tommy when I tell you something
Is wrong you do not do It
No sir
But when your conscience tells you
a thing Is wrong you keep right on and
do It
Yes sir
But doesnt your conscience hurt
you when you do something wrong
Yes sir but not in the same place
you do Houston Post
Boys and Girls Down East
TWO POPULAR LECTURES
BY
153SSjiijTiiij in my i p
UKhXmJJXItUJJiliBJJ U J
MOVEMENT 0b 1HE PEOPLE
VinoiL Williams ia homo from Mor
rill Nebraska
Mrs and Miss Hark wore Lincoln
visitors closo of last week
Merlin Bros have returned to their
home in Sioux City Iowa
RIis3 Loretta Kkating of Denver
is in tho city on a brief visit
Mr and Mrs M U Clyde arrived
homo Tuesday from Hot Springs
Mrs C A Fisher arrived home
first of tho week from her trip west
Mrs Charles A Johnson of Leban
on was a county seat visitor last week
Miss Minnie Pade was in Hastings
Thursday between trains on business
Louis Fleishman returned closo of
last week from an outing of two weeks
in tho mountains
Dorthy Carman is afflicted and iso
loted with scarlet fever but tho disease
is progressing favorably
Mrs F E Kennedy and family are
down from Sheridan Wyoming guests
of her mother Mrs Mary Mullen
Jules Merle went in to OmahaMon
day to have his eyes treated being
troubled with cataract formation
Mrs W G Dcjtton left this morn
ing to attend the national encampment
G A R at Saratoga Now York
Mrs J F Forres and tho family ar
rived home last Saturday from their
outing of a couple of weeks in the west
Mr and Mrs J E Tirrill arrived
home Monday night from spending
several weeks with friends in Boulder
Colo
Mrs T B Campbell returned home
last Friday from spending two weeks
with her daughter Mrs E J Kates in
Plattsmouth
C M Bolles of Morton Park Illi
nois returned close of last week to Red
Willow county and will try farming
hern for a season
Mrs J M Brady Miss Jennie and
Frank departed Monday night for St
Paul Minn where they will visit Mrs
Bradys brother for a couple weeks
Mrs E M Day Mrs Oscar Grismore
and children arrived home Thursday
morning on 2 from their visit to a son
and brother in Salt Lake City Utah
Miss Claudia B Hatcher was up
from Indianola Saturday Miss Hat
cher will be one of the nominees for
superintendent of public instruction
this fall
Mr and Mrs A R Mehaffey of
Pittsburg Pa arrived in the city first
of the week and expect to make their
home here She is a sister of Mrs T
B Campbell
Mrs Adele Phelan Miss Viva and
Master Tom arrived home early m
the week from their Tolland Colorado
outing and camping having sojourned
briefly in Denver en route home
Mr and Mrs A P Thompson of
Omaha were in the city Monday brief
ly between trains on their way home
to Omaha after spending several weeks
with the Marslands in Washington
Mr and Mrs William Hiersekorn
of Lebanon preeinct attended the state
fair assisting in the Red Willow county
exhibit He had with him a fine sample
of wheat which weighed 61 pounds to
the bushel
Mr and Mrs C D Noble and Mrs
Maggie B Jeffries arrived home Sun
day morning from a delightful trip to
Salt Lake City Utah taking in the
Grand Canyon and other glories of the
Colorado Utah country
M W Eikenberry and son Loran of
Kokomo Indiana arrived in tho city
Wednesday on No 1 and are guests of
his brother Daniel of this place M
W was recently elected county clerk of
Howard county Indiana
Mrs A Backstrom was up from Lin
coln close of last week making prepa
rations to return to McCook in time to
start the children to school Seplembpr
16th They have been spending the
summer in Lincoln with relatives
Steve Wilson arrived home from a
long absence in Kansas close of last
week He was in search of a long lost
span of livery horses which he succeed
ed in recovering while absent He sold
the team at a good figure while away
R F D No 1
Miss Ada Walkington of Cambridge
commenced school in the North Star
district on Monday
Frank Dudek and family returned
Tuesday from their visit in Colorado
Miss Geneva Fitch opened school in
Prospect Park district Monday
Leon Rogers and John Crocker went
down to the state fair Wednesday
morning
Mis3 Freda Mette commenced teach
ing in the John Hammel district Mon
day
Miss Margaret Evans has two young
lady guests the Misses Anderson
Mr and Mrs G F Randel have been
entertaining some guests from Colorado
part of the week
W N Rogers expects to go from the
state fair at Lincoln to Spokane Wash
to hunt bear like Teddy
The weeds about the mail boxes should
be cut down In some places they are
so high the carriers cannot seethe boxes
and signals
r
fiXVl
a I 5K fc
ARTIFICIAL PEARLS
What a Little Silver Fish TaugrA
French Beadmaker
Ill tell you said a jeweler hvS
the wonderfully perfect artificial peart
came to be invented
A rich French beadmaker Moise
JnquLn he lived in the seventeenth
century found a pond In his garden
covered one morning with a lovely slV
very luster Amazed he called lib
gardener who said it was nothing
some albettes had got crushed that
waii all
Albettes were little silver fish bleaks
tho Leuciscus alournus The gardener
explained that if you crushed them
they always gave the water a pearly
sheen like that Jaquiu put on his
thinking cap
For six years he worked with beada
and bleaks wasting millions of both
but finally he achieved success He
learned how to extract the pearly lus
ter from the bleaks scales and to cov
er a glass bead with it
What he did and his method is
still used was to scrape the scales from
the fish wash and rub them and save
the water The water decanted gave
off a lustrous fluid of the thickness of
oil a veritable pearl paint a magic
fluid that imparts a lovely pearly sheen
to everything it is applied to
It takes 1000 bleaks to yield an
ounce of this pearl paint New Or
leans Times Democrat
CIRCUS RIDERS
They Earn Good Salaries but Their
Careers Are Short
A man horseback rider receives from
75 to 123 a week and his career as a
principal rider lasts about ten years It
Is short not so much because these men
get stiff and lose their agility as be
cause they lose their nerve Nearly all
circus folk marry young and with their
added responsibilities comes a lively
sense of danger which they ignored in
younger days A man rider who can
not turn a somersault on a horse can
not command more than 50 a week A
woman rider who can perform this
feat gets from 150 to 200 a week if
she is a finished rider
This isnt much when all the disad
vantages of the calling are taken into
consideration but it should be remem
bered that all the expenses are paid
Including the care feeding and of
course the transportation of their
horses All they have to provide Is
their own clothing For the men riders
clothes do not constitute much of a
factor and the women nearly always
make their own except those provided
by the management
French Rags High Priced
A collector of rags offered the man
ager of a large boarding house a cer
tain price for a bag of wornout lirien
These rags are worth more than
that said the shrewd landlord I
run several houses In this neighbor
hood and all are occupied exclusively
by French guests
The dealer apparently considered
that remark sufficiently explanatory
He cast a hasty glance upon the con
tents of the bag then raised the price
And he could well afford to raise it
too sard the landlord Even at that
rate he will make money off the things
French rags the world over bring a
higher price than any other The rea
son why French people wear a bet
ter quality of linen and their castoff
garments are In demand by all manu
facturers of high grade paper New
York Press
The Congregation Smiled
Two country clergymen had agreed
to exchange pulpits on a certain date
One of them made the following sol
emn announcement to his congregation
on the Sabbath previous to the event
My dear brethren and sisters I have
the pleasure of stating that on next
Sunday morning the Rev Zachariah B
Day will preach for you Let us now
sing two verses of hymn No 4S9 That
Awful Day Will Surely Come
And It took him some time to discov
er why the congregation smiled
The First Boat
At first when a man wanted to cross
a deep stream he was compelled to
swim across But man at best is a
poor swimmer and it was not long be
fore he invented a better method of
traveling on water A log drifting in a
stream furnished the hint By resting
his body upon the log and plashing J
with his hands and feet he found he
could move along faster and easier
Thus the log was the first boat and the
human arm was the first oar S E
Forman in St Nicholas
Vitty Women
Women have more wit than humor
They are more sensitive than men
Their minds are nimbler Their
thoughts Hash instantly to an intuitive
conclusion hence wit is far more nat
ural to them They have hardly tho
intellectual patience to create or enjoy
the less obvious and more deliberate
moods of humor Munseys Magazine
A Failure
So you dont believe in the mind
cure
No
Did you ever try it
Well I once tried to convince my
wife that she didnt really want a new
gown Judge
Looks That Way
I wonder if Mars really Is inhabit
ed
Dont know but if Saturn is Ill bet
the politicians own it
Think so
Certainly cant you see the rings
Philadelphia Press
A concoaled spark is more to U
eared than an open fire German
Proverb
P
imm i aomm a im a
SS9SSVl
School Dresses
School Hats School Caps
School Tams
vvwv
Now Is the Time
To get the girls ready
Clapps Is the Place
to buy their outfits There you will find the best assortment
and the biggest values
in
Dry Goods
Ladies and Misses Furnishings
Armor Plate
Hose
are all guaranteed to give
satisfaction
Fay Stockings
give the best satisfaction for
children
Ask to see our Undermuslins
for children they are cheap
er than you can make them
An Extraordinary
Purchase of Ribbons
Has just been received and we are putting them on
sale at per yard
The regular 40c and 50c values all colors in stripes and plaids
v
H C Clapp
Exclusive Dry Goods
We would be pleased to have you call and give us a trial
THE BIG LOAF FOR 5 CENTS
Ask your grocer for Merles Bread
25c
AAAAAiVSVS
Ladies Furnishings
Walsh Block McCook Nebraska Telephone S6
iw
THE TRIBUNE Office for Office Supplies
MERLES BAKERY
Bra Between Suttons and McConnells m mmmasBmmm
Fresh Bread Daily
WHITE GRAHAM and RYE BREAD
BUNS LAYER CAKES
COOKIES ANGEL FOODS
CINNAMON ROLLS COCOANUT KISSES
AND PIES
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