The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936, August 04, 1899, Image 8

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. JOHN MoPnEE ,
DENTIST.
. . . . of Chicago.
"Se Upstairs in Meeker building.
C. H. BOYLE ,
ATTORNEY AT LAW
McCook , Nebraska.
Room 3 , Meeker-Phillips Bldg , Upstairs
General Coxey says that what the
Democratic party needs is a new set of
brains. A run into the shops for some
repairs of thai nature might also add to
the general's usefulness.
A free and easy expectoration is pro
duced by a few doses of Mallard's Iloie-
hound Syrup , in all cases of hotirsmtss
sore throat , or difficulty of breathing
Price 25 and 50 cts. * at McConnHl &
Herry's.
We are to pay the sultan of Zulu $12-
ooo a year , but as he has a large herd of
devoted wives who learned the guui-
chewing habit from the missionaries long
ago , and as imported gum costs money
in that country , the wages do not seem
lee big.
No Right to Ugliness.
Tlie woman who is lovely in face , form
and temper will always have fiieud- , hut
one who would be attractive imi&t keep
her health If she is weak , sickly and
all run /lovvn , she will he nervous and
irritable. 1 ( she has constipation or
kidney trouble , her impure blood will
cause pimples , blotches , skin eruptions
and a wretched complexion Electric
Bitters is the best medicine in the world
to regulate stomach , liver and kidneys
and lo purify the blood. It gi\es strong
nerves , bright eyes , smooth velvety skin ,
rich complexion. It will make a good
looking , charming woman of a tun down
invalid. Only 50 cents at McConnell &
Herry's drug store.
Develop inus
cles , nerves and
bralus and make
a man of yourself.
Send for one of our
Doctor's Question
blanks. No two
cases treated alike.
Sexual Avcuk-
11 e M M , J o M 8 of
p o w c r , drains
after stools , pre
mature discharge.
Vnrirocele cured erne
no charge. Where
you aie suffering
from effects of sell
11 b ii H c we are
pleated to say that
we are today the
only ( inn who can
guarantee a cure
with our Turkish L
M L'ui > > > uiOb.Ve never fail to cure no
nutter a to sige. Do not look further , as
c stamp will get our blank.
Hi nnn pni < jnNsji ( > iiiii * > curedur
DLUUU rUIOUll
medicine is guaranteed
; o cure any case , no matter how severe erie
longstanding , with Turkish Syphilis
: urc. $2 box. All conditions changed. Write
.is for particulars. Dept. T-
HAHN'S PHARMACY. OMAHA. NEB.
McCook Markets.
Coirected Friday morning.
Corn $ .30
Wheat 46
Oats 25
Rye 35
Barley 30
Hogs 3-8o
Eggs 10
Butter 14
Potatoes 60
About one month ago my child , which
is fifteen months old , had an attack ol
diarrhoea accompanied by vomiting I
gave it such remedies as are usually
given in such cases , but as nothing gave
relief , we sent for a physician and it was
under his care for a week. At this time
the child had been sick for about ten
days and was having about t\venl > five
operations of the bowels every twelve
hours , and xve were convinced that 1111-
les it soon obtained relief it would not
live. Chamoerlnin's Colic , Cholera and
Diarrhoea Remedy was recommended ,
and I decided to try it. I soon noticed
a change for the better ; by its continued
use a complete cure was brought about
and it is now perfectly healthy C L.
Boggs. Stumptown , Gilmer Co. , W. Va.
For sale by McConnell & Berry.
In West Virginia , a few days ago. J R.
Shoemaker , aged 102 , and Irene Pol'n } ,
aged 95 , were married. They were lov
ers seventy-five years ago , but were sep
arated , and are now evidently making a
play to break even with cruel fate.
Herbine is well adapted to the cure of
fevers of all kinds , because it thoroughly
cleanses the stomach and bowels of all
bilious humors , and expels all impure
secretions of the body. Price 50 cts. at
McConnell & Berry's.
A Lane count ) * , Kansas , man walked
forty miles to hear Sam Jones preach ,
and kicked himself every foot of the
way back home.
Volcanic Eruptions
Are grand , but skin eruptions rob life
of joy. Bucklen's Arnica Salve cures
them ; also old , running and fever sores ,
ulcers , boils , felons , corns , warts , cuts ,
-uises , burns , scalds , chapped hands ,
chilblains. Best pile cure on earth.
Drives out pains and aches. Only 25 cts.
a box Cure guaranted. Sold by Mc
Connell & Berry , druggists.
There is no consolation in the scien
tific announcement that the average life
of the house fly is but thirty days when
there are always new candidatee from
rising generations ready to fill the va
cancies caused by natural death or fall
ing into the gravy nisli.
LADIE'S Friend
and Pennyroyal Pills bring
menstruation to the day.
Never fail. No Fain ; No
IHwatipoiittmcnt. $1.00
box ; 2 , boxcw cure uuy
rai e , no mutter as to cause
Kahn's Pharmacy ,
Dept. T.
Omaha , - Nebraska
HARVESTER KING
0 ® ® ® ® ® ® ®
Cuts and Binds 12-ft. Swath
Successfully.
We sold about a dozen of 'em to Red Willow
county farmers , last year , and they were thoroughly
pleased and satisfied. The Harvester King enables
the up = to = date farmer to cut and bind early , and to
head later on in the season , both with the same ma =
chine ; thus avoiding the greatest risk from hail and
handling the greatest possible amount of grain.
WE ARE ALSO AGENTS FOR
The Old Reliable Buckeye Binder.
The J. I. Case Threshing Machines.
The Columbia = = a small , 8 = horse Thresher.
The Renowned Piano Steel Jones Lever Binder.
The Celebrated Ideal Deering = = the wonder of all.
McCOOK , NEBRASKA.
He Ate Ills Fill.
A local clergyman is telling n joke or
himself. He vrent'to Chicago on busi
ness and was aaked by a family in hit
church to call on a married daugbtei
there. The pastor called and received i
hospitable welcome. They urged bin
to come to dinner , but he had an en
gagement. Then they remarked , "Well ,
will yon not eat a little luncheon ? "
The hostess pointed as she spoke to i . <
email table on which were a small dial )
of salad , some bread and fruit. "Well.
I don't care if I do , " replied the caller ,
who drew up a chair and began an on
slaught on the provisions. He fancied
they had been arranged expressly foi
him , and it was only after he had got
through that he noticed the blank looks
of the family. In fact , he had devoured
the entire luncheon which all had ex
pected to eat.
"Madam , what must you think oi
me ? " he exclaimed to the hostess.
"But let me beg of you not to judge all
Kentnckiuna by me. I am the eole
stupid one in our state. "
He was equal to the lady whose
hostess showed her a dish of water cress
at a side table just before dinner was
served. Thinking it had just been pur
chased , she stuck her hand in the dish
and took a handful of it only to find it
dressed with French salad dressing and
prepared to accompany the birds at the
meal. Louisville Times.
He Noticed tlie Likenens.
A Parisian swell recently bad a
crayon picture of himself made , which
he afterward pretended to find fault
with.
"It does not bear the slightest resem
blance to me. " said he. "and I will not
take it. "
The artist protested , but all to no
avail.
After the dandy had left the painter
added to the portrait a magnificent pair
of ass' ears and exhibited it in the win
dow , thus altered , to the gaze of the
curious public.
It hadn't been long exposed when the
dandy entered the artist's studio in a
towering rage , and , finding that threats
amounted to nothing , he at last offered
to buy it , even at a considerable ad
vance upon the original price.
"It wasn't strange you didn't recog
nize your resemblance to the picture at
first , " said the painter , "but I knew
you'd notice the likeness as soon as I
added those ears. " Spare Moments ,
by Halter.
Among ignorant people of Englisl
birth it is fully believed that a wife
bought with money or goods is legally
married if the purchaser leads her al
the way home by a halter.
Mr. Baring Gould , the English anti
qnarkin. tells of a village poet known
to him who bought a wife for a hal
crown and led her 12 miles to his cot
tage.
tage.The
The squire and the rector protested
to the village poet that he was no
legally wedded.
"Why , yes I be. " he replied. "I'l
take my Bible oath I never once tcok
the halter off till she'd crossed the doorsill -
sill and the door was shut. "
The latest instances of such wife sales
occurred in 18.18 and 1839. when wom
en were sold in Little Horton and in
Dudley In these cases a blue ribbon
took the place of the straw halter.
But , gentle ladies , the symbolic idea
was the same.
A JLiuiKli on I nril Ivulvlii.
A good story is related of Lord Kel
vins' lecturing methods at the Glasgow
university. As a professor of science he
can use long words in such formidable
array as would make a dictionary break
its binding with horror. During a
course of lectures once on magnetism ,
for instance , he defined an ideal mag
net as "an infinitely long , infinitely
thin , uniform and uniformly and longi
tudinally magnetized bar , " and the
misguided students vocifeornsly cheer
ed , which caused the professor to say ,
"Silencel" This definition was made
and cheered , with the usual reprimand ,
frequently during the lectures. Once ,
near the conclusion , however , the stu-
Jents did not cheer , but Lord Kelvin ,
from force of habit , rapped out "Si
lence ! " the same as before.
A Cnte Lad.
A young Irishman once went to a
iind hearted old squire for a recom
mendation. An elaborate one was writ-
; en and read to him. He took it with
thanks , but did not move.
"What's the matter with it ? " roared
the squire.
"Oh , nothin. sorr. ' said the lad
juickly.
"Well , then , why don't you go ? "
"Sure , sorr , I thought on the stringth
> f a recommind like that you'd be
vantin to hire me. " San Francisco
Argonaut.
Soniitl Transmission.
Water is a v"ery good transmitter of
onnd. A scientist of the name of Cal-
ado.i made some experiments on Lake
Seneva , Switzerland , to demonstrate
ho power of sound to travel a long way
n water. A clock was made to strike
mder the water and was heard to a
iistance of 12 miles. In a second ex-
leriuient the striking of a clock was
eard to a distance of 27 miles
A Triple Coincidence.
An almost incredible triple coinci-
ence was noted in France a few years
go. In 1894 the deputy for the Ar-
ennes was M. Ferry ; for Loir et Cher ,
L Brisson , and for the Vosges. M.
[ ugo. In 1793 , 101 years earlier , each
istrict had been represented in the
hamber by a man of exactly iha same
ame. San Francisco Call.
Not Her Style.
"The. idea I" exclaimed the eensa-
ional actress as she beat an angry tat-
DO on the floor with her slipper.
"What's the trouble ? Can't you get
our divorce ? "
"Yes , but that lawyer has offered to
; cnre it without publicity I" Wash-
igton Star.
The cakes of Ivory Soap are so shaped that" they
may be used entire for general purposes , or divided
with a stout thread into two perfectly formed cakes for
toilet use. For any use put to , Ivory Soap is a quick
cleanser , absolutely safe and pure.
A WORD OF WARNING. There are many white soaps , each represented to be "just as Rood
as the 'Ivory' ; " they ARE NOT. but like all counterfeits , lack the peculiar and remarkable qualities of
the genuine. Ask for "Ivory" Soap and Insist upon getting it.
COPYRIGHT 1030 BY THE PROCTER fc GAMBLE CO. CINCINNATI
Box Elder Circuit.
Sunday-school at Box Elder church
every Sunday at 10 a in. Church services
at ir a. in. every two weeks dating from
Sunday. Dec. 4. Sunday-school at Gar
den Prairie appointment every Sunday
at 10 a. in. Preaching at iia in every
two weeks'lating from Dec n. Preach
ing service at Spring Creek at 3 p. in.
every two weeks dating from Dec n.
D. L MATSON , Pastor.
Five Cents a Copy !
That's the remarkably low price at
which we are closing out the remainder
of our Navy Portfolios , those itiperb
pictures of onr splendid and victorious
navy. You can buv the entire series of
twelve numbers for 50 cents. This is
less than half price , and they are only a
few sets left.
Are recognised th world over as representing the highest type
of excellence in bicycle construction..Are now within reach of all
MONARCH ROA
DEFIANCE ROADSTERS $35
King and pueen Roadsters $25
J at these prices.
MONARCH CHAIMLESS $75
Send for Catalogue Agents \vantod in open territory
MONARCH CYCLE MFG. CO.
Halstsd and Fulton Sts. . CHICAGO Church and Reade Sis. , NEW YORK
RIDE A MONARCH AND KEEP IN FRONT
When Nature is overtaxed , she haa
AN UNFAILING SIGN THAT
her own way of giving notice that assist
ance is needed. She does not ask for
NATURE IS APPEALING help until it is impossible to get along without
it. Boils and pimples are an indication that
the system is accumulating impurities which
must be gotten rid of ; they are an urgent appeal for assistance
HELP. a warning that can not safely be ignored.
To neglect to purify the blood at this
time means more than the annoyance of painful boils and
unsightly pimples. If these impurities are allowed to
remain , the system succumbs to any ordinary illness , and is
unable to withstand the many ailments which ar * so
prevalent during spring and summer.
Mrs. L. Gentile , 2004 Second Avenue , Seattle. Wash .
says : " I was afflicted for a long time with pimples , which
were very annoying , as they disfigured my face fearfully.
After using many other remedies in vain. S S. S. promptly _
and thoroughly "cleansed my blood , and now I rejoice in 5
a good complexion , which I never had before. "
Capt. W. H. Dunlap. of the A. G S.
R. R. . Chattanooga. Tenn . writes :
" Several boils and carbuncles broke out upon me , causing
great pain and annoyance. My blood seemed to be in
a riotous condition , and nothing I took seemed to do
Z& any good. Six bottles of S S. S. cured me completely
* * and my blood has been perfectly pure ever since. "
is the best blood remedy , because it is purely vegetable
and is the only one that is absolutely free from potash and mercury. . It
promptly purifies the blood and thoroughly cleanses the system , builds up
the general health and strength. It cures Scrofula , Eczema , Cancer , Rheuma
tism , Tetter , Boils , Sores , etc. , by going direct to the cause of the trouble and
forcing out all impure blood.
Books free to any address by the Swift Specific Co. , Atlanta , Ga.
*
* ; r
wagon
wheels with
MICA Axil Grtast
Get a bor and learn why It's tha
beat grease ever put on an axle.
Sold everywhere. Made by
STANDARD OXJL , CO.
. His Life Was Saved.
Mr. J. B. Lilly , a prominent citizen of y"
Hannibal , Mo. , lately had a wonderful
deliverance from n ( rightful death. In *
telling of it hesa\s : "I was taken with ' /
typhoid fever , that ran into pmnmonia.
My lungs became hardened I was so
weak I couldn't even MI up in bed.
Nothing helped mr. I expected to soon
die of consumption , when I heatd of Dr.
King's New Discovery One bottle gave
great relief. I continued to use it , and
now am well and strong. I can't say too
much in its praise. " This marvellous
medicine is the surest and quickest cure
in the world for all throat and lung
trouble. Regular sizes 50 cents and Jr.
Trial bottles free at McConnell & Berry's-
ding Store ; every dottle v fnintee < l.
To Cure a Cold in One Day.
Take Laxative Itroiiio Quinine Tablet
All druggists icfiind money if it fails to
cure. 25c. The genuine has L. U. Q. on
each tablet.
The RexW It Costley. of Stock-
bridge. Ga , while attending to his pas
toral duties at Hllenwood , that state ,
was attacked by cholera morbns. He
says ; "By chance I happened to get hold
of a bottle of Chamberlain's Colic , Chol
era and Diarrhoea Remedy , and I think
it was the means of saving my life. It
relieved me at once. " For sale liy Mc-
ConneH & Berry.
General Shafter's retirement in Octo
ber will leave a vacancy in the army
that will be mighty hard to fill by
weight.
Where the digestion is good , and the
general powers of the system in a
healthy state , worms can fine no habita
tion in the human body. White's Cream
Vermifuge not only destroys every worm ,
but corrects all derangements of the di
gestive organs Price 25 cts. at McCon
nell & Berry's.
A Kansas paper tells of a prominent
citizen "who died without medical as
sistance. " The doctor was perhaps just
then engaged in assisting some other
prominent citizen to die.
The Best Remedy forKlux.
Mr. John Mathias. a well known ttock
dealer ofPulaski , Ky. , says : "After suf
fering for over a week with flux , and my
physician having failed to relieve me ,
I was advised to try Chamberlain's Colic ,
Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy , and
have the pleasure of stating that the
half of one bottle cured me. " Forsale
by McConnell & Berry.
Ballard's Snow Liniment gives instant
relief in cases of bleeding , burns , bruises
scalds , cuts , etc. Price 25 and 50 cts. at
McConnell & Berry's.
IF YOU LOVE YOUR
SMOKE ONLY
FRAGRANT
10 * CIGAR 10 $
A'DAYIS'SONS &CO.MAKERS
JOHN G.WOODWARD&CO.
WHOLESALE DISTRIBUTERS
' ' r
COUNCIL BLUFF5.IOWA-1
VlcCook Transfer Line
J. H. DWYER , Proprietor.
attention paid to
auling furniture. Leave orders
fc either lumber yard.
TABIER'S mi
BUCK EYE Fill
OINTMENT
CURES NOTING jyj
A SURE and CERTAIN CURE
known for 15 years as the
BEST REMEDY for PILES.
SOU ) BY AIX DRUGGISTS.
gr terSIS-AJfflSOiT HE ) . CO. . ST. LOS
At HcCONNELL & BERRY'S ?