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About The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936 | View Entire Issue (April 6, 1894)
TRIED THRICE. i
Some children stood In a group beta*
the door of tho village schonlhoiise.
“Tho new schoolmaster, Meinhcrr Freid
lich, comes tomorrow,” suid Otto.
“I am so glad! I was weary of that old
master, Hoffman, with his crooked prob
lems and hard lessons.”
The following clay the hoys were stand
ing around tho school house, when the door
•pencil, and f.I:> ter Kreldrlcb himself ap
peared and cried in a cheery, hearty voice:
“Welcome, my children!”
“Welcome, master!” they cried.
And now they entered and took their
seats, and school began. The thumb worn
books were brought out, the lazy hoys be
gan to sigh and frown and wish impatient
ly for the recess and wonder why Lutiu
dictionaries were ever invented, when, as
if by magic, they found themselves listen- j
Ing to the pleasant voice of Master Kreid
rich anil actually understanding their les
sons, so clear and simple were hisexplana
tiona, and the time for recess came, to their
great astonishment., long before they had
When tho studies were over, the master
drew from his desk a box, and while the
fhildren gathered around he opened it and
drew out charming little white and pink
■eashellsand many other beautiful things,
which he gave to the children with loving
But the most loving thing of all was a
little porc elain statuette of an angel. She
stood with her small white hands folded
over her breast and bor eyes uplifted, and
the children gazed enchanted.
“Oh, the beautiful angel!” cried they
all. “Wilt thou not give it tome, Master
“Tlie little angel is too lovely to he giv
en to any little boy who is not good and
trim of heart. Wo shall see who will de
serve her. He who brings me tomorrow
the brightest tiling ou earth shall have the
Tbe next day after the lessons were fin
ished tho children clustered around the
master to show him what tiny be-i
brought. All these things were placed on
the schoolmaster’s desk, side by side. 1"
shill ing shone away famously, the [.ob’.h
and the watch crystal did their lir-f, hut
KUne’s buckle was the bravest of all.
“All, mine’s the brightest!” shouted
Kline, clapping bis bands.
“But where is little Carl?” said Mas! r
Freidrteh. “He ran out just now.”
All eyes were turned to the door, warn
presently in rushed Curl, breathless, la his
hands, held up lovingly against his neck,
was a poor little snow white dove, Some
crimson drops upon the downy breast
showed that it was wounded.
“Oh, master,” cried Carl, “I was look
ing for something bright, when I came
upon this poor little white dove. Some
boys were tormenting it, and I caught it
qnickly and n>n here.”
Even as he npoke the dove’s soft eyes
were filniy.it nestled closer in Carl’sDeck,
then gave a faint cry, dropped its little
head and died.
Carl sank on his knees beside the mas
ter’s desk, and from his eyes there fell
upon the white dove’s poor broken wing
two tears, large aud bright.
The master took the dead dove from bis
bands and laid it tenderly down on th3
desk with the bright things; then raising
Carl he softly said, “My children, there is
no brighter thing on earth than a pitying
The boys were silent for a moment, for
they felt that the master had decided that
Carl had rightly won the angel. Then
Kline cried out: “My master, thou didst
not fairly explain to us. I pray thee give
ns another trial.”
“What sayest thou, Carl?” said Master
“Yes, give its another trial,” answered
the generous boy.
The good rnnster smiled thoughtfully,
and his eyes rested for a moment lovingly
upon Carl. Then glancing round he said,
“He who brings mo tho loveliest thing on
earth tomorrow shall have the angel.”
The children clapped their bands and
departed satisfied. After school the next
day Klino was the first to run np to Ma -
ter Freidrich and lay upon his desk what
he considered tho loveliest thing in the
whole world—his new soldier cap with the
long scarlet feather and bright golden
Max came next and placed beside the
cap a small silver watch, his last birthday
gift. Otto brought n great pictnro book,
just sent to him by his godmother; Ru
dolph a tiny marble vase, richly sculp
tured, and so on, until a still more motley
collection than before lay upon Master
Then poor little Carl stepped modestly
up and placed in the master’s hand a pure
The master softly said: “My children,
the word of God says: ‘Behold the lilies of
the valley. They toil not, neither do they
spin, yet Solomon in all his glory was not
arrayed like one of these.’ Carl has right
But murmurs arose. The children were
not satisfied, and again they asked for an
“Now, this is the last time,” said the
master. “He who brings me the best
thing on earth shall have the angel.”
“The very best thing on earth is plum
cake,” cried Kline on the third day as he
walked up to the desk, bearing a large
cake richly frosted.
“Nay, thou art wrong this time, Kline,”
said Max. “I asked my father what was
the very best thing on onrtb, and he
laughed and gave me this golden guilder.
The prize is mine!”
“Ah, but my father said that the very
best was a good glass of Rhenish wine,”
cried Otto, “and I have bronght a bottle
of It 30 years old. The prize is mine!”
So they went on till they had placed
their offerings before their master.
“And thou, Carl?” said he. “What hast
tbou brought which thou thinkest the
beet on earth?”
A crimson flush rose to the boy’s fore
head, and coming softly forward he took
from his breast a small, worn book and
then laid it down with the rest as he said
tn a low, sweet voice, “My mother, dear
master, says that God’s book is far be
yond all other earthly possessions.”
“ ’Tis thine, my Carl,” cried the master
—“the white angel Is thine!”—Exchange.
.Owner of Fishpond (to man who is tres
tjwRsing)—Don’t yon see that sign, “No
Angler (with an injured air)—Yes, and
I dispute it. Why, there’s good fishing
here. Look at this basketful I The man
must have been insane who pnt that board
A Great Scheme.
Arthur—Say, Sammy, what are you
buying a bouquet for?
“Why, I’*e going to take it to Miss
Trim, and I shall tell her a young gentle
man sent It. She’ll give me enough to pay
lor the bouquet three times over. ”—Frank
THOSE FEELINGS OF HIS.
Ik Was Heartless, lint lie Had to Iteallse
While a Michigan avenue grocer waa
standing in his door the other day, a for
lorn looking old chap turned in on b ui
from a side street, with a plaintive ex res
aion working awuy on his cbm. The m:n
nte the grocer got Right of him he caked
“Now you goon, or I’ll have you run in!’’
“W hut am I doinf” plaintively inquired
the old man.
"I know your game, and you can’t play
tt on me) Just move right along, or I’il
have you arrested!”
“1 huiu’t got no game to play on you or
anybody else. If i feel sad and heartbroken.
I can’t help it, can I? What’s them tur
nips wuth? I never see turnips without
thinkin bow my wife got choked lodeut )i on
one. Poor critter! She was cut right down
in the prime of life. That was the begin
nin of my runuin down hill. She hadn't
bin dead two weeks”
“Are you going to move on?” demanded
“Purty soon, my friend—purty soon,’’ re
plied the old tnau as he leaned up again : n
poet and wiped his eyes. “She was a good
wife, and the recollection of her death .- .■!
dens me. What’s taters sellin at today.
The grocer was looking around fo. :m
officer aud didn’t reply.
“I never see taters without thinkin of
my son Bill. Bill was an awful good boy—
too good for this world. I sent him to town
with 10 bags of taters, aud in liftin inoi.i
out of the wagon he busted a blood ves.-i-i
aud was brought home a corpse. I kin
never think of it without weepin.”
He leaned heavily on the post and wept,
while the grocer walked down to thecorncr
to extend his search.
“I see you’ve got red onions,” continm-d
the old man as the grocer returned. “They
are alleys a sail, sad sight to me. I sold n.
farm alter Bill’s death aud was goin down
to Florida to raise red onions fur this mar
ket when 1 wins t.lirowed out of a wag: \
and broke my leg. and somebody stole every
dollar I bad. Beil onions is only red onions
to other lulks, but to me they call up some
awful recoliecuuns. I wish”
“See here, old man,” interrupted the gro
cer, “will you take 10 cents and go on?”
“1 don’t want no 10 cents, but yet if you
object to my givin away to uiyfeeliu’s”
“I do object. If I could find an officer,
I’d have you ruu in, but as I can’t I’ll buy
you off Ibis once. Take this money and
“It seems heartless to sell my feelin’s
this way, but 1 don’t want to make you
any trouble. I see you have some cabbages
there I never see cabbages without thinkin
But the grocer turned him around, head
ed him across the street, aud after two
kicks he got away and was soon lost to
sight.—Detroit Free Press.
Financier—You literary men haven’t the
first idea about business. Here you have
about 10,1) 0 manuscripts piled up in
dark closet, and you say they are all paid
Editor of Great Magazine—Years ago.
“Just think of itl Hasn’t it ever occur
red to you, sir, that you are losing the in
terest on all the money you paid ont for
these useless bundle ?”
“Hah! You financiers haven’t the first
idea about literature. Everyone of those
manuscripts is from a different author, and
the whole 10,000 of them will go on buying
our magazine at 85 cents a copy until the
articles are printed.”—Texas Siftings.
M:stress—Did you learn how Mrs. Upton
Servant—Please, mum, I pulled at the
doorbell half an hour and couldn’t make
anybody hear. I think the bell had been
Mistress—The idea! How is the poor in
valid to know that her friends are anxious
about her if her heartless relatives have
muffled the doorbell?—New York Weekly.
He Knew the Game.
Deacon Heavyweight—And so you are
going to leave us, parson?
Rev. Mr. Thanktul—Yes. I have had a
call to another parish, where, by the way,
the salary is considerably larger. I am
sorry to leave my flock, but I must obey
Deacon Heavyweight (dryly)—Waal, it
may be what you call a call, but it seems to
me a good deal more like a raise.—Life.
An Irreverent Imputation.
“Did you notice how long Dr. Steenthly’s
sermon was last Sunday?”
“Yes. 1 think 1 know why he made it so.’'
"Yes. The offerings in the contribution
box were very small, and he may have
taken that method of reminding them that
they were getting a good deal more than
they paid for.”—Washington Star.
At a social gathering in Harlem Gns de
Smith sat at the piano and drummed care
lessly on the keys. Hostetter McGinnis
came to him and whispered:
“Why do you sit at the piano? Yon
don’t know how to play.”
“I know it, but as long as I sit here the
others can’t play either.”—Texas Siftings.
A Frugal Man.
Miss Muggles—I don’t like Dr. Penny
save a bit.
Miss Mugge9—Why not?
Miss Muggles—You know he was called
in when I was sick, and then he began to
call regularly. After I refused him be
itemized each of those calls in his bill as
professional visits.—Chicago Record.
A Better Land.
Tramp (reprovingly)—Ah, lady! In the
part of the country I just come from the
women didn’t ask us to saw a cord of wood
for our dinner.
Lady of the House—Didn’t, heh? Where
did you come from?
Tramp—The natural gas regions.—Puck.
Husband—The idea of buying a hat trim
med with chicken feathers!
Wife—These look like chicken feathers,
I’ll admit, but they are not.
"How do yon know?”
“By the price.”—New York Weekly.
"Has your daughter stopped her music
Mother—Yes, on account of sickness.
“When will she be able to go on?”
“As soon as the neighbors are well enough
to endnre H.”—Chicago Inter Ocean.
“That Lord Bronson who married Jenny
Simpson Was an awful boor. He was mar
ried actually in a business snit.”
“Well, why not? The wedding was a
aure matter of business so far as he was
“Oh, It’s Just the sweetest bonnet I ever ;
saw! I do,wish I could buy it!”
“And why couldn’t you, Parthy? Heav
en knows you earn it, working yourself to
death year in and year out for Bob Rig
gers and his children.”
“Gracious, Gerildy! Put $12 in a bori i
net? Why, I’d feel as if X was stealing I
from my own family! And people w<
say I was putting ou airs—trying to ic.i-1
like a girl!”
“Well, is there any harm in try • !•
look young? As to not being able t • .
the bonnet, Parthy, you ought to • i ..;
do when 1 want a thing.”
“How’s thut, Gerildy?”
“Why, I just look Hector .Jon. •< i '•
eyes and tell him it’s got to come..
that settles it. He knows I won't i. no
any foolishness from him.”
“But suppose he can’t afford it?”
“Afford it, fiddlesticks! Men can id’ .
a great many things when they lino tin •
“No, Gerildy, you can’t persuade r..c :>
be extravagant. I am trying to help it y
husband, for he works hard, and 1 f: cl
that we ought, to do something for tl.e
poor and needy this winter.”
“Goodness gracious, Parthy Riggers! 1
never saw such a woman. You’ll be sail
ing off to heaven the first thing you know
—yon ’re getting so good 1 But suppose w e
fo and look at the bonnet tomorrow.
'hat’ll not cost your husband or the poor
anything, will it?”
Parthy consented, though she had no
idea of buying the bonnet and was sorry
she had mentioned the subject to Mrs.
Jones, for that lady would be sure to de
nounce the prudence and economy of her
neighbor as penuriousness.
Mrs. Jones and Mrs. Riggers entered the
little milliner’s together to see the bonnet
with pink roses. To oblige Mrs. Jones
Parthy Riggers put it on her head. Mrs.
Jones at onee exclaimed: “Don’t buy it, i
Parthy! It doesn’t become you at all. ” j
Mrs. Parthy was much relieved.
“I-et me try it on,” said Mrs. Jones ns
she proceeded to find fault with the bon
net, saying she was much disappointed in
it. She stood before the mirror, however,
and eyed herself admiringly on every side. !
“I might be induced to take it,” she said
to the milliuer, “if you’ll come down in
the price. I don’t need it, but the pink
roses are becoming to me.”
“But you’ve bought your winter bon
net, haven’t you, Gerildy?” said Mrs. Rig
gers, with surprise.
“Yes, but I look so well in this,” she
said in a low tone, “I don’t think I ought
to lose the chance. ”
The milliner fell in her price from $12
to $10. Mrs. Jones walked away with the
bonnet, and it was charged on an account
already overd <e. On their way home the
two ladies stopped in a store where Mrs.
Riggers wished to make a small necessa- I
ry purchase. Here Mrs. Jones spied a del
icately embroidered pink scarf, which was
a perfect match to the roses on her new
bonnet. “Wouldn’t they go sweet togeth
er?” she said. “Just the thing for the
noonday wedding I’m going to next week. ”
“But don’t you think it’s a good deal
to pay for a scarf, Gerildy?” said Partby.
Mrs. Jones looked down at her little
neighbor with a smile of contempt, order
ed the scarf charged to Mr. Jones and
Passing another store, she remembered
that the gloves bought for her first bonnet
would not go with the new one, so a pair
of gloves was added to the morning pur
The next day Mrs. Jones displayed her
investments to a neighbor as dressy and
silly as herself. As Mrs. Jones stood with
the pink roses on her head and the pink
scarf wound about her neck, exclaiming,
“Ain’t they lovely 1” Mrs. Lighthead rais
ed her eyes and hands in holy horror.
“Goodness gracious, Gerildy Jones, are
you going to wear them lovely things with
your old green silk? Why don’t you get.a
green satin waist for the old skirt? Then
you will make people stare and lay every
body in the shade, sure enough!”
That was sufficient. The satin waist was
bought. Trimmed and finished it cost $16;
bonnet, $10; scarf, $7; gloves, $2—$35—
quite a little sum out of $1,500 a year,
and poor Jones already tearing his hair
and tossing restlessly at night on account
of money troubles and fear of losing his
But he never told his troubles at home.
He found no sympathy there. The only
check he ever gave Mrs. Jones was to ex
claim now and then, “ForGod’s sake, Ger
ildy, have some pity on a manl”
“If you can’t support me, Mr. Jones,
what did you marry me for? Don’t for
get how you pleaded with me and what
you promised I”
Mr. Jones could only subside into si
lence, unable, as men always are, to argue
with extravagance and selfishness.
The crash came the evening after the
noonday wedding, where the lady in pink
and green cut her last splurge.
Mr. Jones had lost his place, was heels
over head in debt, had been notified by his
landlord to vacate his hcuse immediately,
the shopkeepers were after him, and he was
in despair. There was no loving heart to
whom he could pour out his trials, not a
tender hand to stroke his forehead and bid
him be cheerful, promising to help him
over the dark places.
The poor fellow left town and fell back
on his old father, who had a little farm in
an adjoining county. The old man took
the son in, but affirmed stoutly: “Gerildy
mustn’t put on airs here, my boy! You
know we are honest workin folks. Every
body on my place has to work. If they
don’t, neither shall they eat.”
Ger'ldy is now gracefully performing
over the churn and cook stove. The only
pink roses shewears are in her cheeks, and
the only triumph shewin3is the healthful
sleep which honest toil awards her. The
only reproach she ever heaps is on her own
past life and its sad mistakes.
Mr. Riggers, too, encountered adversity.
His salary was cut down, but when he
announced it in his home he met an ear
nest, loyal little face, which said to him:
' • Now, come, old fellow, don’t give up and
go to looking blue about this bouse! We’ll
get on all right, and I’ve got a little sav
ings bank up stairs that’ll turn out more
help for this trouble than you will believe
till you see it opened.”
“Isn’t marriage a lottery?” Bob Riggers
said to his frieud. “Some men draw prizes
and some draw blanks. Thank God, I’m
one of the lucky ones.”—Sterling Kane in
China’s Great Bridge.
One of the sights of China is the antique
bridge of Sueu-tchen-fow, 2,500 feet long
and 20 feet wide. It has on each side 52
piers, npon which huge stones are laid,
somepf them 20 feet long. Many thousand
tons df'stones were used in the erection of
' bis wonderful bridge, which is regarded
by engineers as indicating constructive
talent as wonderful as that which raised
• he Egyptian pyramids.
CREOSOTE AND CONSUMPTION.
rite Drug Would Heriu to Be Aide to Mas
ter the UlHeike,
Consumption is now combated by
many specialists using creosote. The
benefit derived from the proper employ
ment of this drug is hardly questiona
ble. Dr. Warner, consulting physician
to tho French nospital, New York city,
writes to Tho Medical Journal: ** Dur
ing a somewhat extensive employment
of this remedy in phthisis for tho past
four years, both in hospital and in pri
vate practice, I have watched with
great encouragement the steady gain in j
the results obtained, but it has been
only during the latter half of the time
that the positive value of creosote as an
ggent tor combating most powerfully
the effects of this disease has been made
apparent. Formerly my custom was to
administer the drug in small doses, ex
ceptionally giving more than six or eight
minims daily. Dnnng the last copple
of years, however, the doses have been
largely increased with correspondingly
better resnlts. ” Some specialists ex
plain the favorable action of creosote in
lessening the bronchial secretion and
improving the appetite. Other observ
ers, however, believe in a distinctively
curative value of the remedy.
Dr. Warner writes:1 ‘ The general con
dition of the patient, as a rule, rapidly
improves. In some cases the appetite
is better, the eongh at first becomes less
during tho daytime, while remaining
quite as before during the night. After a
time, however, it also lessens at night.
If the sputum has been tinged with
blood, this condition disappears, con
trary to what might be expected, as cre
osote is said to congest tho bronchial
inucons membrane, and while at first
the sputum is not much lessened, if at
all, its character is changed—from be
ing thick and yellow—muco-purulent,
in fact—it becomes thinner, fiothy and
contains less solid matter.
In no case where previously attacks
of hemoptysis—spitting of blood—had
occurred have they taken place after
the creosoto treatment has been estab
lished. The night sweats grow less and
in many cases entirely disappear, and
after awhile there is a total absence of
the daily fever. The weight of the pa
tient always increases at first, then it is
apt to remain stationary, and in excep
tional cases may lessen, and then a grad
ual increase takes place. The first in
crease in weight is no doubt due to the
impiovement in appetite and the great
er ability of the patient to properly as
similate the food consumed.”
Large amounts of creosote may be re
tained without discomfort, one of Dr.
Warner’s patients reaching a daily
amount of 215 minims. A valuable aid
to the internal administration of creo
sote is found by the coincident use of
antiseptic inhalations of creosote. “My
custom is to use creosote combined ei
ther with terebene or ether in a 50 per
cent solution, 10 or 15 minims dropped
on the sponge of a Robinson’s inhaler,
and employed every second or third
hour, and in some instances where
marked benefit has been derived from
the employment of this measure the
respirator has been worn almost con
stantly,” is the testimony of the doctor. 1
He tried also the effect, in a large
ward of a hospital, of allowing an an
tiseptic mixture to simmer gently over t
a low fire during the night. This mix
ture generally consisted of oil of euca
lyptus, carbolic acid and turpentine, j
A dram each of the first two and two
drams of the last were put in about a
quart of water in a shallow dish and
heat applied. The effect was to fill the
ward with a pungent, aromatic vapor,
which has a markedly restful action,
coughing being not nearly so general or ,
frequent.—New York Ledger.
Reducing Vibration In Railway Cars.
A new invention embodies a princi
ple which will commend itself to all i
railway travelers. It is sought to les- 1
sen the discomfort and annoyance of
travel on many lines on which there is
excessive vibration by the construction
of a pneumaitc car “which embraces
the application of an elastic fluid as an
absorbent for vibration and oscilla
tion.” An air cushion is arranged on
the cellular principle between the car
body and the truck frame, and as there
is an equal distribution of air under
varying pressures all oscillation is pre
vented. This elastic medium is said to I
completely absorb all vibration result
ing from rough tracks, jointing of rails,
excessive speed or any other cause, and
the car is carried smoothly and steadily
along. This pneumatic system can be
equally well applied to street cars, and
instances are not hard to find in which it t
unquestionably should be.—Exchange. I
An EaRtern Dainty.
The Chinese are certainly a strange
people—strange in appearance, customs
and tastes. One of their greatest deli- ;
cades of food, regarded from a Chinese
epicure's point of view, is "milhi,” j
which, in plain English, means "new
born mice, yet blind. ” These are placed
alive on little trays and set before each
gnest, who dips them one at a time into
a jar of honey and then swallows the
tiny creatures. When the emperor’s wed
ding was celebrated a few years ago, j
50.000 of the helpless creatures were
thus consumed.—New York Herald.
Novel Way of Selling a Corn Carer.
A gentleman who has been traveling
in France relates that in Paris the bar
ber who was shaving him stepped two
or three times upon the side of his foot.
At last the customer called out:
“Please don’t do that any more! 1
have a corn.”
“Exactly what I was trying to find
out, monsieur,” said the barber bland
ly. * ‘ We have an excellent preparation
for removing corns, for sale at a franc
per bottle.”—Texas Siftings.
A Childish Miracle.
Father—My boy, who is only three
years old, said to me this morning—
;tells the same old story).
Friend—Yes, and isn't it strange that
* child only 3 years old can repeat jokes
ihat are at least 25 years old?—Hallo. !
A SHARK STORY.
H ive T ever Keen a shark f As'; my mate,
him that’s rowing that ’ere couplei : \ un
der. We were shipmates together ou board
the Rajupootah InUiamau. Mia futhcr,
who in dead ami gone this 20 year or more,
was carpenter aboard of her.
“Chips,” we used to call him, and if
you don’t mind listening to an old s ilt
who’s been round the world cnmi; ■ (i
to make a lamb mail giddy at the v -j
thought of it I’ll just tell you of a li i
adventure we had with one of them man
Well, one day we were becalmed on l ie
line, when says young Bill—he was young
—says he, “I shall have a swim round
for a cooler,” for, believe me, the suit was
that hot we hadtothrow buckets of water
ou the deck to keep it from catching (ire.
In fact, a pig we killed the day afore
we hnng aloft and roasted him in the sun,
catching the gravy in a bucket, ami lie ,
was done beautifully.
So in he goes, head first, with his clot hes
on, and me and his old man looked over
the side, just Hbuft the forerigging, to sec j
him come to the top of the water again. |
Pnt no Bill could we see, and instead
of him came up a tremendous shark with (
his side sticking out ns if he had a cargo
inside over und above his regular hill o’ i
It was then as clear to os as the nose on ,
onr faces tliut poor Bill had dived clean
down its throat.
The poor old man had a fit right uway, i
and we carried him below und put biru
ill liis hammock and then rau up ou deck
again in the hope that wo should bo aide
to catch the fellow.
Put it was now here to be seen, so aft/ r
watching sometime to no purpose we went
down below to see how the old man was
getting on, and to our astonishment and
sorrow we found his body nearly cold and
as stiff as the flying jibboom.
We sewed him up in bis hammock, put
ting the grindstone that he used to grind
his tools with inside to make it sink and
Ill'll the body nn a hatch, with the union
jack spread over it for a pall.
Then the skipper read the funeral serv
ice, all cf us standing round, dreadfully
cut up, me especially, for young Bill was
my messmate, and I was very fond of the
As soon us the skipper bad finished the
last words, which I shall never forget—
they was so solemn—the hatch was tipped
np, and overboard the body went with a
splash, and all was over—at least we
Hut almost immediately afterward up
comes another shark—a lugger one, it :
seemed, than the first—certainly it was
The boatswain at once ran for the shark
hook and baited it with a junk of .pork and
slung it over the stern, and it was not
many minutes afore we had him hooked j
and hauled on deck.
Well, the first thing we did was to cut I
his tail off', for he was flapping it about so ,
that it shook the ship from stem to stern,
and we were afraid it would shake her to
After we bad done that we thought vve
heard a very strange noise inside of him—
a sort o’ grating sound, like a boat being
dragged over a shingly beach.
So we set to ami cut off his head and
then ripped him up, when, what d’ye
think, what should wo see, to our great
astonishment and delight, hut Hill ;;ud
his father sitting upright like two Jonahs,
tho youngster turning the grindstone and
the old man sharpening his knife, intend
ing to cut their way out of the creature’s
You say I paid the old man was dead. ]
Please don’t interrupt me, and I’ll tell you
all about it.
There’s no doubt but what ha seemed
dead, hut it was only his blood from with
horror, and the shark warmed him to life
What made him most uncomfortable,
Bill said, was t he slipperiness and topsy
turyness of the place, for there was no
rest at all, for one minute he was stand
ing on his head and the next on his feet
and then topped from one sideto theother,
sometimes getting jammed between its I
ribs, and he wondered the meal didn’t dis- '
agree with the fish itself. .}
But at last came the climax, and Bill !
thought it was all over with him, for down j
its throat was shot a heavy body like a
sack o’ coals right atop of him, nearly ,
smothering him, so that he had scarcely
room to move or breathe, and he must have
been some time insensible, he said, when I
he was woke up by a loud report.
He thought, for a moment the creature I
had swallowed a powder barrel, and it bad
exploded, but it was only the bursting of
the canvas shroud the old man was sewed
up in, which had blown up like a paper
The noise in its inside, Bill said, must
have astonished the shark, for he again
found himself standing upon his head, so
he knew it was making for the surface,
and on reaching there it opened its enor
mous jaws for air, when a flood of light
entered between the rows of teeth, which
enabled Bill, on gaining his feet, to take
stock of his lodgings, and the very first
thing that he saw was his old father crawl
ing out from under the canvas like a chick
from its shell.
The old man had caught sight r.f the
grindstone and soon put it into working
order, and on the fish once more coming
to the top and again admitting light Bill
at once saw what was in the wind, and
they commenced business at once, when
they were startled by a Eudden change in
the shark’s movements, and soon they dis
tinctly heard the sound of human voices,
and they knew they were saved.
Well, we all was so thankful at their
miraculous escape from the j:iws of death
that every mother’s son of us on board took
our solemn affidavits that we’d never tell
a lie or anything of that kind again, and
me and my mate have kept our words ever
A Small Matter.
A Detroit roan, noted for his very non
ous and earnest manner, wentcut not long
ago with his wife to find apartments. Aft
er a time they found a pleasaDt place and
had agreed to take it.
“By the way,” said the landlady, “I
forgot to ask if you had any children?”
“We have a boy,” responded the mother.
“Indeed? I’m very sorry,” protested the
landlady, “but I cannot permit any chil
dren to come into my house.”
“Oh, that will lie all right,” said the
gentleman encouragingly, but with great
seriousness. “We can fix that with very
little trouble indeed. We will just kill the
boy.” And they went on to other places
which, like heaven, suffer little children
to come unto them and forbid them Dot. —
Detroit Free Press.
All t'p With Him.
“Yon bad a high old time in Kurope?” j
“Yes,” replied the returned tourist, “I
had. I was done up at Monte Carlo, held j
up in the Apennines and laid up in Rome.” I
I'atc of a folltlral Bohn.
The tri.il anil sentencing to six years
in Sing Sing penitentiary of John Y. Mc
K.mo shows that it is still possible in
this republic to punish men who try to
corrupt the ballot and defeat honest
elections. This one trial and sentence
will make it easier to have pure elections
in ull the rest of tlio country—easier to
arrest and convict other ballot corrupt
ers. The will of the honest people of
this country over comes uppermost at
last. It was Lincoln who said that you
cannot fool all the people all the time.
McICane was the political boss of
Gravesend, a suburban township of
Brooklyn that includes Coney Island, the
seaside resort. Ho was known as the
boss of Coney Island. At the election
last fall 0,000 votes were cast in it popu
lation of 8,000. This illustrates the meth
ods of the boss. He was influential and
very rich. Besides being a political boss,
he was a Sunday school superintendent.
He let nothing go by.
The election inspectors of both parties
were under bis thumb. lie bought, ca
joled and threatened. Early on election
day it was seen by some of hm political
opponents that the election inspectors
their party had placed at the jiolls were
not doing their duty. Tickets were said
to be written out boldly and thrust into
the ballot box with no voter attached.
The opposing party appointed other in
spectors who could bo trusted. The
boss would not let them see the registry
lists in the six Gravesend voting dis
tricts. Then they got out an injunction
from a Brooklyn judge restraining him
from meddling with the inspectors. lie
brushed it aside as ho would a fly. “In
junctions don’t go hero,” be saitl.
But the man who had frequently boast
ed, “1 fear no living thing,” bad gone
one step too far at last. The wrongdoer
always does go just a little too far at
last. The boss' own party repudiated bis
He was arrested. Six indictments
were found against him. One of these
w as for contempt of court in refusing to
obey the judge’s injunction. Another
was for the still graver offense of con
spiracy to defeat the election laws. In
one of the precincts that had in 1802 a
total population of 1,008 there were reg
istered 2.015 voters. Thus bold had the
boss grown. For half a dozen years
nine-tenths of all the votes of Graves
end. Republican and Democratic, were
cast j'ast as the boss wanted them to he.
But that was not enough. The next step
was repeating and manufacturing votes.
Judge Bartlett, a man belonging to his
jwn political party, was the individual
who sentenced the fallen boss. It was a
dramatic scene, that sentencing. All the
boss’ bravado was gone. The man who
feared no living thing stood, white faced
aud trembling, at last before the laws of
his country that provide for a pure bal
lot and righteous elections. Judge Bart
lett declared that the sentence of six
years in stripes in the penitentiary was
justice tempered with mercy. The boss
found out that injunctions do go, even
in Gravesend. The moral effect of this
judgment will extend all over the United
States and give ns a 1 Hitter name in Eu
Some intelligent young people who
follow the proceeding** of congress doubt
1< ss wonder what is meant by the Bland
seiguioriage bill. Persons desiring to
sell silver to the United States or to get
it coined into dollars for themselves take
it to the treasury department or to the
mint in the form of bullion, which is
bars of pure silver. Pure silver is too
soft to wear in dollars. The standard
American silver dollar contains alto
gether 412$ grains of metal. Of this, 371$
grains are pure silver. The rest, or one
tenth of the whole weight, is alloy, chiefly
copper. This leaves on the hands of the
government in pure silver the one-tenth
pure silver that it took from the weight of
every dollar to add the necessary alloy.
The government keeps this for its own
to defray the expense of the coinage. It
is called the government’s seigniorage.
There is now in the treasury vaults some
$50,000,000 worth of seigniorage that has
been left over from the coinage of the
many silver dollars since the resumption
of silver coinage in 1878. This is what
Mr. Bland wantB made into dollars and
put into circulation.
Germany and Russia carried on a
commercial war for months. Neither
would take the lead toward practicing
or advocating a reciprocity commercial
doctrine. Suddenly France imposed a
considerable import duty on wheat. This
of course would hurt Russian wheat en
tering France. Immediately Russia
found out that she did not love France
so much as she did last summer, and
soon af terward the reciprocity treaty be
tween Germany and Russia was signed,
and now we are assured that there will
be no war in Europe. State reasons are
pocket reasons, just as with private in
If you are ever going to buy any dia
monds, the next year or two will be the
time to do it. They promise to be lower
than they ever were before. Small stones
can be bought in London for almost one
half less than they could be a year ago.
The Indians who have leased lands in
their reservation to cattlemen have a
dead cinch on getting their pay. The
red man simply cuts the wire fence,
slaughters the dishonest white man’s
beeves and eats them.
The southerners say that everything is
coming their way, even woman’s rights
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