WEEKLY TRIBUNE ? VOLUME IV. McCOOK , RED WILLOW COUNTY , NEBRASKA , THURSDAY , SEPTEMBER 17 , 1885. NUMBER 16. \ f BUSINESS DIRECTORY UNITED STATES LAND OFFICT McCook , Nebraska. 0. L. LAWS , Better. C. F. BABCOC2 , Beeelvc : OFFICE Hocus : From fl A. M. to 12 M. , am 1 to 4 P. M. , mountain time. * " COCHRAN & HELM , Attorneys-at-Law8 Gen'l Agents McCOOK , : NEBRASKA. Prompt and careful attention given to Law Cases li all the Courts of the State and all classes of U. S Land Business transacted before the local office a McCook. Nebraska , and tbe Interior Department a Washington , D. C. Contests a specialty. Will pros . acute claims for Pensions .and claims for Increase o Pensions. Notarial business done and lands bough and sold on reasonable terms. j2T"Oftlce 1st dooi south of the U. S. Land Office. 3.29 THOS. GOLFER , ATTORNEY - : AT : LAW AND NOTARY PUBLIC. Agent for the Lincoln Land Company. Real Estate Bought and Sold and Collections Made 83P Office , Opposite Chicago Lumber Yard McCook , Nebraska. R. M. SNAVELY , ATTORNEY : AT : LAW , NOTARY PUBLIC , INDIANOfA , - - NEBRASKA. Will practice in the County and Districl Courts of Red Willow , Hitchcock and Furnat counties. Commercial collections a specialty , Taxes paid. Conveyances carefully drawn and a general land business transacted. Office 1st door south of McCartney's brick store. PAGE T. FRANCIS , COUNTY SURVEYOR , RED WILLOW COUNTY. 1 Keeps certified plats of all lands in the Hitchcock land district. Special attention given to all such business. Correspondence solicited. 8-23. J. E. CASTBERG , ' DEPUTY COUNTY SURVEYOR , AND CIVIL ENGINEER. "Government Claims Located and Sur veyed. Correspondence solicited. Office with Jennings tc Starbuck. a. W. MINKLER , Surveyor and Civil Engineer. W111 do all kinds of Surveying , Grading , Leveling , etc. Will establish regular sub- " " ' "ion corners , and re-establish lost corners , Jgive certified PLATS of surveys ; the plats . , -ng as good as the County Records. „ % r/Residence at McCook , the first dwelling N. $ W. of the school house. IR. ) A. J. SHAW , PHYSICIAN.AND . SURGEON , * . . McCOOK , - .NEBRASKA. X Office in the McCook Banking Co.'s Building. * DR. Z. L. KAY , PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON , McCOOK. - - NEBRASKA. 09 Office : Room No. 1 , McCook Banking Company's Building. DR. A. J. WILLEY , SURGEON B. & M. RAILROAD. IPFFICE AT B. & M. PHARMACY , ] McCOOK , - - NEBRASKA. T. B. STDTZMAN , M. D. , Eclectic Physician and Surgeon , OCULIST AND AUEIST. McCOOK NEBRASKA. "Office on East Dennison Street. " B. B. DAVIS , M. D. , PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON , McCOOK NEBRASKA. Office : Two doors south of Churchill House. JOHN F. COLLINS , CONTRACTOR AND BUILDER , McCOOK. - - NEBRASKA. Jobbing n-tll receive prompt attention at my shop on Dennison St. , opposite JlcCook House. Plans and specifications furnished If desired. WILLIAM McINTYRE , CONTRACTOR AND BUILDER , CULBERTSON. NEBRASKA. "S All work warranted. All material furnished If desired. "Work done on short notice. W. M. SANDERSON , HOUSE AND SIGN PAINTER , McCooK , - NEBRASKA. I5 ? A11 work guaranteed. G ive me a call. W. . W. PALMER , Successor to B. H. EA1HL70N. Has opened a full and complete line of .HARNESS AND SADDLERY GOODS , 2 Ds North of PttoSee , HeCOOS , NEB. Prompt attention given to repairing. Your patronage is solicited. ROBERT DRYSDALE , MERCHANT TAILOR , W. DENNISON STREET , McCOOK NEBRASKA. CHARLES STDISON , FASHIONABLE BARBER AND HAIR CUTTER , WEST DEXNIf OX STREET. McCOOK. - - NEBRASKA. " TYPE WRITING. RTG. , W. S. WHEELER , . O. Box 3. AIcCOOK. NEBRASKA. .iVv t - % i , ' -J'-11 1 . ' . rs , ' ' it : This Space is Reserved . v . . " ; " ' _ - ' FOR = EEE PRATT & LAWSON DEALERS IN HARDWARE , McCOOK , NEBRASKA. . THE CITIZEN'S BANK OF McCOOK DOES A GENERAL BANKING BUSINES : Collections made on all accessible points. Drafts drawn directly on the principal cities of Europe. Taxes paid for Non-Residents. Money to loan on Farming Lands , Village and personal property. Fire Insurance a specialty. Tickets for Sale to 'and from Europe , COB2ESPON3SKTS : I T . w . r\ . J T > j * . J. DOLAN President. . . . . , , , . , W. , T- „ , , . First National Rank Lincoln Neb. f The Chase National Dank , New York. | V. FRANKLIN , Vice-Presidcnt. The First National Bank OF MeGOOK , NRBRASKA. PAID UP CAPITAL , - - $50,000.00. DOES A GENERAL - : - - : - BANKING BUSINESS , Receives-and Pays Deposites. Buys-ant ! Sells Exchange on New York , Chicago and Omaha , and all the principal cities of Europe. FIRE INSURANCE WRITTEN IN RELIABLE CO.'S. OFFICERS AND DIRECTORS : GZOS3S HOC2NELL , President , A. CAMPBELL , P. L. B20WH , Cashier. B. i ! . TBEES , 7ie-Preddeat , ( Of Frees & Hocknell. ) ( Assistant Supt. B. & M. ) ( Of Kirby Carpenter Co. , Chicago. ) CENTRAL MEAT MARKET , CHURCH & "WHITTAKER , PROPS. . VEGETABLES STEAWBERK1ES IN SEASON. BUTTER'AND EGGS ALWAYS ON HAND. FRESH FISH AND CHICKENS. Major ( now Sir P. ) Lumsden was in Afghanistan the Sardar of Can dahar expressed a desire one day to see the rifle practice of the English. In the course of the shooting he saw some spar row's heads shot off , and , while express ing great astonishment at the feat , re marked that it was much more difficult to shoot at a hen's egg and smash it than to knock off any number of spar rows' heads. The Major and his friends laughed at this nice difference ; but the Sardar was determined that his asser tions should be at once put to the test , and accordingly ordered one of his at tendants to fetch an egg and suspend it agaipst the opposite wall of the court. This being done firing was commenced by the Englishmen , and to their amaze ment , after some dozen shots , the egg was unharmed. The Sardar and his at tendants maintained their gravity and every moment volunteered some excuse for the miss , as each bullet failed to smash the egg. Presentlyby accident , a ball happened to sever the thread by which it was suspended , and down fell the egg upon the pavement below , but to the astonishment of Major Lumsden and his friends , did not smash. The trick was now apparent , and they joined the Sardar and his friends in a hearty laugh at the deception. The trick had been pre-arranged by the heir-apparent , who had prepared the egg by having its con tents blown out through a hole in the nd. The empty eggshell as light as a feather , was pushed aside by the wind of the bullet , and could not be struck. GEN. LOOAN is credited with the fol- owing language toward President Cleve- and and his policy : "It is fashionable to say that the administration is doing fairly well. It is fashionable to say he s coming up to the expectations of the friends of civil service reform. Yet this civil service reformer at the head of a reform administration changed 200 fed eral officers in a single day to make room for partisans. History has never heard of the like before. It may never hear of the like again. When Lincoln came nto power he had democrats to deal with , although he was elected as a re publican. This man has removed more o'fficials in a month than Lincoln remov ed jn a year. We have held Andrew Jackson up to execration as one of the _ reat spoilsmen of history. Yet this man in four months has made more re movals than Jackson made in his entire .dministration. " A VERY offensive partisan democratic postmaster in the democratic convention of Iowa in a nominating speech said , "The eyes of all the democrats that sleep in heaven are Upon us to-day. " This created a great "guffaw" in the convention. The idea that there were any democrats in heaven was funny ; the further fact that they would be asleep when appointments at the rate of two hundred per day were being made , was more funny , and that the eyes of demo crats that were asleep could be "on" anybody was too funny. His man. was beaten. Exchange. A CINCINNATI heiress recently mar ried an Italian count , and brought him to this country with her. When he reached Cincinnati , he became very de spondent and melancholy. Her doctor said he was home-sick , and advised her to supply him with some of the scenes of his home. She accordingly bought him a monkey and a hand-organ , and since then he has gained over forty pounds , and is training for a rowing match. MOKE than five hundred thousand cases of bowel complaint have been cur ed by Chamberlain's Colic , Cholera and Diarhcea Remedy. Only think of the pain and suffering it has relieved , the agony and distress it has prevented ; the homes it has made happy ; the lives it has saved , and you will appreciate the good worfc it has done. 25 cent , 50 cent and $1 bottles sold by M. A. Spalding and B. & M. Pharmacy. SHERMAN , as the apostle of the bloody shirt , is a good deal like the small boy who suddenly began to cry without any apparent provocation , and who , in re sponse to maternal inquiries , explained that he had mashed his finger the day before and didn't cry then because he was playing and didn't have time. BOOTS are seldom worn in the even ing , and undressed kid is the fjivorite material for slippers , says a i'ashion journal. It may be added that slippers are not a favorite with the undressed kid. MANY a man might have died and "the innumerable caravan" joined es teemed as one having mediocre ability and sense , had his voice not betrayed his asininity. A NATIONAL convention of the misfit officials of the-past generation would need the earth a ? its meeting house. A BABY has been born in Texas with five hands. 'It got them pat , we believe. LYTLE BROS. and HARDWARE , S'TEXEl-L MAILxS , BARBED WIR Cooking Stoves and Ranges , Bain Wagons and Spring Wagons , Iron and Wood Pumps , SCREEN DOORS AND WINDOWS , WHEEL BARROWS , Walter A. Woods Mowers. MANUFACTURING AND REPAIRING OF Tin , Sheet Iron and Copper Ware a Specialty , McCOOK , Opp. Citizens Bank. NEBRASKA. JEWELRY STORE ! AINS ! QOODS. AN ELEGANT ASSORTMENT OF SILVER AND PLATED WARE The Finest in the West , and at Prices that Can't be Beat in this Country. I ALSO HAVE A FINE LINE OF BOOKS At Half Price ! Well Bound , Finely Printed and Make Handsome Gifts. 3iikens , 15 Vol. , $9.75. Irving s Works. 10 A'ol. , § 6.50. Eliot's Works , 8 ToL less than $ G. Hundreds of others in proportion. Single books , 45u. to 65c. These prices can't be beat.