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About Custer County Republican. (Broken Bow, Neb.) 1882-1921 | View Entire Issue (June 9, 1904)
- - A .IV A M E IV THE S A .N 'D. - Alone J walked the ocean IItrand ; A Jlearlr well WIlS In In ) ' hnnd : - I staollell nnd wrote upon the sand II1y namo-the ) " { ! 3r-tllC day , . As omvard trom the : lpot 1 passed , One IIngerln look behind r cast : A WO\'o como rolllnf hllrh anll fIJllt , Anll washed my nes aW111. I , And so , methought , 'twill IIhortly be 'Vllh e\'ery mark on earth from mo : A wave ot dnrk obll\'lon's flea 'VIII IIweep across the place 'Vhero I ha\'e trod the sandy sher. . , ot tlmo , and beellj to IJo no moro. ot mo-m ) ' llay-t 10 name I boro. To leave nor track nor t.:1co. . And , 'et. with Him who counts the sands , And holds the waters In his ha\l 8 , 4iI I know a Instlng record Rtands. ( Inscribed against my name , DC all this mortal part has wrought : ot all this thlnklnlr soul has thought , And trom these l1eeUnl : moments caught For glory or tor shame. -Hannah Flagg Gould , . ' " V . j' J 1Y- ' \ /7/ : - - - VJfNUJ'lP \ ; \ " ' ! -0 , " ' " . . / --Os-- < ' / - : : - - . . J-I ' _ kIt j' ' , \ > Ji\J' \ \ ItDeB 'fflrlMW 6 < . ' 1 f/ -o- , x - Nrt - ) xJf : NK.5onr.'wC VT ! , Dennington loolted after Lucy AI. ton's retreating form with amaze moot. Only the night before she had prom- lsed that she would marry him In the spring and had sealed the bargain wIth a ldss. She had been tender and , loving then. T1\ls morning she waUted past him with no sign that she was aware of bls presence save a. haughty "Sir ! " 'whon ho had raised his hat in saluta. tion. " The moro Dennington thought it oover the moro inexpllcabblo it became. Ho and Lucy had been more than friends for a couple of years. She J1ad so clearly shown her preference tor his oclety that none had sought to dispute his position. Ho could imaglno no rival w1/o might havoJ > Oisoned her mind against 111m In so brief a. tlmo as had elapsed . . 'Sinco the night before. Ho puzzled . 11ls brain unUl it whirled , but still no . tatlsfactory ; explanation presented its. .elf. .elf.Then Then ho decided upon a very foolish action' . Ho left town. Not oven his most Intimate friends 1mew where ho had gone. and for sev- cral weelts the set in which ho moved 'Wondered at his hurried departure. 'Then they decided that Lucy Alton bad refused him after all. and they ave the matter no further thought. As for Bennington , ho was seoklng to dispel his ennui In Paris. and only succeeded in discovering that gay -capital to bo a most dispiriting place. .A. week later ho was arguing with the , 'Customs officials on the famUlar pier in Now Yorl , . . His man was too well trained to ex. niblt an ' surprlso when his master . .valltcd In. He sllentl ' placed a hugo liIu ur Idlers upon the IIbrbary table and went out to attend to the trunl , . Dennington turned the letters over . , Idly. Suddenly he gave a start. There . .vas ono lIttle square envelope ad. dressed in a handwriting. the sight of which'mado his heart beat faster. He tore it opon. "Dear Jack. " it ran , "what has be- 'Come of you ? It Is not nice. sir , to Jen-ve ono's fiance in this abrupt fash. : ion. Have you already repented 'our I > roposal ? I don't IIlw to think that. 'Come In , J'ack. and tell mo what the trouble is. I did so want to see you Jast night. " It was signed "Lucy. " and bore a date ono day later than his experi. I enco on the avenue. I ! A second note was in Mr. Altcln's I llandwrlUng. This was dated a weel. later. In vigorous terms her father told Dennington what he thought of 11ls actions. "I learn that you are abroad. sr , " 11e wrote. "I should advise 'ou to reo mah1 there. I cannot be answerable for the circumstances should we meet. " , If Lucy's letter' had been a puzzle , . . , A. " . . . - . " # , , . , - , I i I ' . : ' 1 " - - ; : . - - ; ] "Slrl" , , this was even less understandable. I r' There was no mistaking th cut direct 110 had received. In the face of that. why should she wrlto a day later , as though nothing had llappened. and I why should her father b nd hie as a scoundrel and a cad. . 'fho qulcl\Cst way to find out would be to. drive around to the Altons. 110 called a cab and In ten minutes he WIli hotdln converse with Judson. the Altons' buller. Judson was polltlUt very ovidenUy fearful. " 1'leaso don't insist , Mr. Denning' .ton , . . . he plt'ad. . "MI. Alton Is no' , strong. sir. If be were to see 'ou , the excitement mlgbt kill blm. " "SeG here. Judson , " persisted Den. nlngton hotly , "what's the matter ? Why should the excltoment kill Mr. Alton ? What have I done ? " Judson coughed ever so sIlghtly. He was too well trained to admit that ho I know the family secrets. ! "I'm sure I don't know anything. " I declared Judson respectfully. "Only Mr. Alton declared that 'ou were not to SeG Miss Alton , and Dr. Sommers ordered mo to bo careful that Mr. AI. ton did not see you. I am very sorry , slr- " There was a slIght pause , and before - fore he could gather his senses Den. 1.I. . . . . _ v' , . . . . . . "Are you sure you will never make the same mistake again ? " nlngton found himself outside the closed door. It would never do to make a scene on the front steps. Bennington was determined to get at the bottom of the mystery. but this was not the place. He jumped into the cab again and was driven around to Mrs. Graves' , who had been his mentor slnco his mother's death. "I'm sure I don't lenow what the matter Is , Jack. " she said sympathet. Ically. "There Is a report around that Lucy would not have 'ou. and that 'ou took a broken heart out of sight until It mended again. " "How can I find out ? " bo urged. "I can't go along lIJO this. It will drive me crazy. " "Come to the tableaux vivants tonight - night , " said the matron , "Lucy will bo taldng llart and we wllI try to see h'r. " \ . It was hard upon Dennington to face the curious gaze that ovenlng at the charity entertainment. It seemed to him as though evOl'Y ono'in ' the room were discussing him. Still. he here It bravely. sustained br the hope of sMlng Lucy. She waste to appear in the last picture , and the program IIno read : "Hefiectlons. Miss Alton , Miss Car. ter. " Miss Carter , That must be Mabel Carter , Lucy's cousin from the w'Cst. When the eurtaln went UP. there was no sl < { n , of 1\1lss Carter. It merely dlscl ( 'd L\lc ' standing In front of a minor admiring her rellectlon , Then , sUddenly. the refiection stepped through the 111lrror frame and a great light dawned upon Dennington , He re. membered now that 1\1lss Carter was supposel1 to exactly resemble Luc ' . The resemblance must have been so strong as to have deceived even the eres of love. Heedless of Mrs. Gra"s detaining hand , ho pushed his war through the crowd to the door leading to the im. provlsed stage. Lucy was just com. Ing down the steps fro111 the tern. porar ) ' llatform , Ho caught her wrist. "Lucy , " ho cried , "can 'ou ever for. glvo me for having been such n fool ! I thought 'our cousin was 'ou , and she cut me. I did not have the heart to stay and see 'ou again , If 'ou will forglvo the error I romlse never to do so again , " "Aro 'ou sure you will never make the same mistake again ? " "I assure you that it will not happen again , " ho declared ellserly. Ho sought to take her In bls arm ! ! , but she skillfully evaded him. and a \'olce from the platform cried out : "Seo here. Jaclt ! I don't mind 'our maldng love to Mabel In'ou think It's me-but I draw the tlno IH proxy \tlsses. \ " Then 1\IIss Carter ver ) ' thoughtfullY' hurried to her drossln room , wbllo .Taclt had to malto apologies aaain to the real Lucy. She has accepted a ring as a certain 111eans of ltIentiOcatlou. It I" a clrclot oC plln Jold-Doston Globe , . . \ ; - ; - WEDDING TRIP. I - , Tr Mlvaal Bride and Groom Worried i by the Elemtnts. : ' 1'hrllllng adventures get into the soeloty colu111n9 of the Transvaal newspapers sometlmo.s , A Johannes. burg paper , tells of a marrlago at Lyn. denburg , It says : "Tho brldo were her traveling gown and hn111ediatol ) ' I after the ceremon ' the marriage trll)1 of thlrt ' .olght miles to Pllgrim's H.est was begun In a cart drawn b ) ' eight mules , When about half the dlstanco was made It was found that the Ohrlg. stad river was in flood ami passage was hllposslble. The route was roe traced for about ten miles and tempor. ar ' accommodation secured at farm- - house. Next dn ' , however , the river provcd just as Impassable , and tlms for four da 's the hOne111oon couple were 'held up' b ' the elements. On the third day a traveler attempted to cross with a cart and two l1Orses , but the attempt proved disastrous , for the Ii0rso.B and cart were swent away and were never seen again _ The passenger - onger probabl ) ' owed his lIfo to the fact that he became entangled hl a. barbed.wlro fence. Two days , after this , 'the river having subsided somewhat - what , the help of soma transport drIvers - ers was requisitioned and the cart and team were fioated across , wIth the help of strong ropes at the other sldo. " KEPT UBOY" IN CHECK. Centenarian Restrained SpIrits of His i6.Year-Old Son. Senntor Denew tells of attending a commemoratlvo dinner given tq Ohev- reul , the famous French chemist , on his 100th birthday. apropos of baving himself recentlr arrived at the age of 70. "Chevreul ascribed his longovlty. " said Mr. Depew , "to the fact that being - ing sure of his position In the factory of the Gobelln tapestries so long as ho 'l1lght live , though his position was a modest one , ho'1ever worried about finances , never had serious troubles , and never had touched tobacco 01' al- cohol. He had lived most temperately - ly and dranlt the muddy waters of the Seine , "neslde him was a gentleman who enjoyed the dinner to the utmost and was hilariously and rather uproariously - ly proposing the health of everybody at the table. The old gentleman every little whllo would place his hand upon this neighbor and checlt his levity. " 'Why does Chevreul talee so much interest in his lively neighbor ? ' I Inquired - quired of my escort. " 'Decause ho is his son. ' was the roply. " 'How old Is tile boy ? ' said I. " 'Seventyslx , ' answered my polite escort.-Washington Post. He Couldn't "Recover. " A young clergyman in malting his weeltlr : visits among the poor of his parish in a nearby country village qulto recently learned of a poor , slcl. man who recently came from Ireland with his wife and ono child. When the minister called at. Ute llOuse he was given a most hearty welC1J1110 and on reaching the bedsldo of the sick man was surprised at finding him apparently well. The day being warm the clerg'man suggested that he get out of bed and spend an hour under a shade tree In the garden. "It may do 'ou good , " he added. The wife. who wus present , said her husband had better remain in the house until the folluwing day and then talto a lIttle recreation. When the clergyman returned a week later he found the husband still In bed. "Haven't you been out of bed since I was here ? " aslwd the man of the cloak. "No. sir , he has not , " repilod the wife. "I don't lIlte to tell you , sir , but the doctor ga\'o my husband up a weelt ago and wo sold his clothes , That's the reason 110 didn't go to the garden-Phlladelphla Press , . . . Vain Endeavor. A man once sa\'ed his money In a , "cry Ilrudent way : Ho put a ! Illlo by for fear therc'd be a rainy day ; lIe heeded all the maxlm about thrlCt , and work , and henllh. And I'c\'erencell oconolllY , which Is the sOllrco oC wealth , lIe made some smllll lr1\'cstments , IInd some larjer after while , Ana listened fOI' applause. when ho ns- sumed a better IItylo. Dut sorno at those who Itllow him sl1 < 'cred , whllo othl'rs ! sll11pl ) ' slshed , Ire . hall practiced nil the vIrtue ! ! . IJul the ) ' weren't satisfied. He looltell the situation o'er with sadness and dlsma ) ' , And said , "I guess I'll go nhead and gl\"o the stuff away. ' lIe hullt a lot of bUIldings nnd 81nceroly IItruvo to find , A ' 1'11) ' to lIJond his money that would beneJlt manltlnd. Dut Ileonio .looked askance at him Ilnd said , "I told you 111) . The IIrt oC spolllllns money If ! a thing he doesn't Know. It's scandnloull to contemplate such os- tentll lIous pride. " Ho dill his best to Illeaso thorn ; hut they weren't satisfied. -Washington Star , Scotch Sabbath Observance. Sir Archibald Gellde's eXamlles of the rigid Sabbattlrlalllsm of the HIghlands - lands are Interesting , One Is of a lady who rose early on Su IIday , and carried - ried her canary down Jato the cellar to Ioep the bird quiet. An ther Is of a ) 'oung clergyman whoso ortho-Joxy was suspected hocauso he was seen stl1".1Ing at his wJndow on the Lord's Da , "dandling his bairn. " A third story was told by the lrite Lord Play- fall' , who heard the nurse quieting his lItt1 ho ) ' one Sunday In this wlso : "Whist , whist , m ) ' bonnie lamb ; It's the Saw bath , or I , , 'ud whustle 'e 8 sallg bllt I'll sing ye It p:1ralhrase : , " , , , , I " . f . . I . f. , , AS AFFECTING LABOR REPUBLICAN L.EGISLATION ALWAYS - WAYS FOR WAGE.EARNERS. It Began by Freeing Four Million SlaveD and Hns Constantly Con. trlbuted to the Welfare of Many More Mllllono of American White Toilers. In the "lIIstor ) ' oC the RepubUcan p.artr , " just issued by 0 , P. Putnnm's 80ns , the author , Francis Curtis , con- Ones himself to a purely historical re. "Iew or leglslntlon in th ( ; dUTerent congresses. and the nominating con. ventlons of the part ) . and their pro' ceedlnHs. lIe concludes tills hlstorl. cal narrative. however , with a chalter I.hlch wo bellovo will ho found to be one of the most Interesting portions or the worl" I" this chaptllr he enum- rates the varlets doCections from the IlRrt . , with their causes nnd result ' ' but most. nnal'zlng vcry emphatlcall ) tesoctfuHy the Uberals of 1872 , the Mugwumps of 188-1 anll the antis o ! hc present dn ) ' . Whllo Mr. Curtis con 6dos that mall ' of these men who have left the party , and who emleav- orod to thwart its success , have boon men of character who mllY hnvo been actunt 1l by the purest maUves , yet later events have proven l1nt they ha\'o been entirely unwarrnntod In their actions , and that every defection - tion of the party has been unwlso , un. cnlled for and unjust. Mr , Curtis claims thnt in only one Instance , if indeed in any , have the Mugwumps lJ d any innuenco upon ho action of the Relntbllcan party or upon the his tor ) ' of the country. Con. cludlng this point , ho says : . "It mayor may not bo that. the MUU\TUmlS elected Grover Cle'eland In 1 4. U they did , then they lreclpl. tatell tho'tarilY fight which ended in the Wilson.Gormnn tarlrt , and which , according to the H.opubllcan conton. tlon. brouglt } untold misery to our people. If they crave credit for that they are certainly welcome to It. " In discussing. the negro quesUon the author says : "Tho coming generation or South. erners must In tlmo aclmowledgo the mlstale their fathers are malting , just as the present gcneratlon are free to aclmowledge the errQrs of the ancos. tors of a generaUon or two ngo , Calhoun - houn , Hayne anll McDilffio were mis- taleen in belloving that the South would bo always an agricultural sec. tlon of the country , and tbat n low taritr would be necessary to their prosperity In order that they might sell in the dearest and buy in the cheapest marl < ots. The Democratic loaders of to.day In the South Are mistalten in believing that they must constantly vote the Democratic tlcltat at all times against their own commercial - cial Interests. simply for fear of beIng - Ing outvoted by the negro , to whom they are not ready to ! ; rant the advantages - vantages guaranteed by tbo FIfteenth amendment. " Spealdng of the effect of Republican legislation in connection with our laboring - boring classes , the author says ; "Nowhero Is the beneficlont result of Republican legislation more con- aplcuousl ) ' seen than In its relation to the so.called laboring clutlses of our cotIntry. It began at the outset by freolng four mllIon slaves and glvl g them the opportunity to labor , to ac. Qulro and to o"njoy the rewards of their own exertions. Coming down through the decades nfter the war. from 1870 to 1880 , from 1880 to 1890. and from 1890 to the present tlmo , It has , throngh Its various tariff laws , given opportunity- the worltlngmen of the United States such as Is en. joyol by the laboring classes of no other country on the face of 1ho globe. It has by Its legislation concerning immigration given to ulllions from foreIgn lands an equal opportunity for advancement in their standard of living - ing , through high wages allll constant employment , increasing our home market , which Is the envy of the entire - tire commercial world. This bomo marltet bas awalwned and maintained competition to auch an extent in all lines of industry that our people In larg measure have done their own worlt anll reaped the conaequont f\'llits of their toll. There need be no proofs ! given of the assertion that the worlt. : III men or the United States are far hetter off than the laborers of any othcr country , The st.atement is UII" questioned and universally accepted both at homo amI abroad , The whole situation can ho brlefiy Intt In the words of the eminent French scientist , Prof. Emile l..cvasseur In his worlt on l.'Ouvrler Amerlcaln , In slimming Ul. ' the conditions of the American worl , . ingmen as compared with those of Europe , he sa 's : " 'Wages In the United States . , e about double the wages in Europl. ; obje ts of ordinary consumption by worldng popole ( excepting dwelling houses ) cost less In the cities of the TJnlted States than In these of EU'- rqpe : the Amerlc : n wordngman ) lives better titan the European ; ho ea\s \ moro substantially , dresses better , is more comfortdbly housed nnd moro often owns his dwelllllg , spends more for lIfo Insurance IInd various social and beneficial associations , and , in short , has a much higher standard of lIfo tban the European worlnnan. ' "Not only has the Republican party given the workingman the chance to worlt ; not only has It given him the highest wages paid on earth for that work , but It has seen to It tbat this wage money Is paid III dollars of full value , equal in every case to one hundred - drod cents. " Whl1 the author announces In his preface that "for the most part fucts only have heon related III the plal lest - est of language , It Is hopell clearly . , , ( and without amblgult , yet th rfJ Iqro passages In the boolt I " , bleh wo , . i bellevo will bo widely quoted , not onl1 for thclr stylo. but : ho thoughts thoroln ndvancod. such a 1)1ssngo , for ommplo : , 9 the following : "Tho Rcpubllcnn pnrt . hils been a consistent party throushollt Ita career , and it stanWJ to-dny for th Utreo grent policies for which It stood I\t Its birth , alld during Its every year of ex. Istonco since. These three policies are I.Ihort ) . , Honor and Progresc , I qunl Uberty for e\'ery man , woman and child \lIIdor the shelter of our nag ; lIherty to live. lIbQrt . to toll an. } lIbert ) . to acqulro. Honor-In a atandnrd of vnlue. nIlIt money of re. domltlon , equal to the highest Imown among natlona ; honor-to 1)1\ ) ' in full m'ery obligation : honor-to redeem eve\ ' ' promise , 11111111ed. Bpolwn or written. Pr ( ) res.s-not only of our o'Yn Ioople , ns bns been sho\vn in an elevation. of the mnsses to fIle - highest - est stnndnrd of living nttalned by any people of the human race ; as shown In the development of our Imbllc school 8)'stem , of our lIterature am ! its distribution. of our lahar laws and of our Industrlnl anll financial , : ulIler. taldngs throu hout the length and breadth' the land ; progress-not alon In the elevation or the people of the United States. but In the ad vanCOl11ont of every Ieoplo ami ever ) ' countr ) ' wlune our Influence Is felt ; progress-not nl ' In material tip. building. but In a u1l"utal and moral elovatlon us well. The Democrats and the Trusts. "Tho tarler Ia..the mother ot trusts , " will undoubtedly bo the Democratlo Wfir cry In the natloual campaign. And , with any conservatlvo Democrat as presidential candidate , the l1nrty will not Jack 1camlI lgn fund. The trusts which it professes to attactt w1ll see to that. Such is the seemlngl ) ' impossible paradox which the political sltu'ntlon now presents , Organizations of f'l1pl. . tal are preparing , If It will glvo them the man they wnnt , to support a party proCessing to bo Oiled with zeal to destroy them , Yet when a few fncts nre remembered It Is SC1Jn that the trusts will ho taldng only the lIne of selt"lreServation and self-aggrandize- ment. The men at the head of the great typical combination a , such as the United States Steel and Standard 011 companies , feel that they no longer need the tarler In their business. They bellevo that they have reached such a Imsltlon that they need not fear foreign competition. They are conMent. of their ability to deal with that In ether ways. What they do dread is domestic competition , meeting them In the home marltet and keeplng up wages , and able to do Ulese things because It Is lrotected from foreign competition hy the tariff. And , furthormore. they dls1l1to the president b auso ho hal\ Insisted that no man or body or men can ho or become so great as to bo ahovo the laws of the American 1)00' pIe. pIe.Tho The heads or the great trusts realIze - Ize that political platforms count for nothing , and that laws count for very little , unless the mon elected to office on those platforms are resolved to on. force those laws. What they want Is not different laws , but a dlrt rent man In the Whlto House-a man who is not merely rigidly fair to them , but Is complaisantly friendly to them. 'fhat Is why the Democrntle party , If it will but give the trusts the mnn they want , no matter what its platform - form , will not laclt for campaign funds , It remains to he seen , how. ovor. whether the American people clln he fooled hy the Democratic trust alliance now visibly forming. The "Pivotal" States. JUdge Pnrlwr now has instructed dolegntlons from Now York , Indiana , I1nd Connecticut. . and the New Jersey delegation , though uninstructed. Is nd. verse to I1earat. Talelng the four states that we Imvo named together. It woulll seem that tholr action must ho dofinlte as egards Hearst. since they are the old pivotal states , With. out. thom no Democrat can Ilossibly win , This Is so well understood that their course wlll exert an enormous Influence In the South , and it has the sympathy of the Democrats of the He- llllhllcan states of the East. The Mnssachusetts dglegatlon , which Is In. stl'llcted foOlne ) ' , will not go to Hea\'st. under nny circumstances. Ills suppo\'t must como principally from Mr. Bryan's old IQIHlIIstic following In the 'West. Its convention strength Is tlJIIS very clearly limited , and its In. fhwnce will ho lessened hecause ofhe fact that the West Is overwhehnlngly Republican. Effective Brevity. The last word has not heen SIO. ItCn regarding the heneOts and advantages - tages of the protection policy , Ropre. . -mtatlvo : Cambell ) of Kansas , proved that something now and strong in the way of condensed fact 1ulght he said when , in his recent s G ch , he declared - clared : " 'rho pollny of protection has pr sel'ved the Amerlcl1n mnrltat for the products of American' manufacturers , und American manufacturers hnvo made marltots for the Iroducts ) of American farmers , and together the1 ha vo established the high standard of living and made posslhlo n high scale of American wl1gos. " ' 1'ho CASO has seldom heen 60 errect- Ively stated in so few worda. It tells ! I. great story In a very short space. - What Interests the People. 'rho last Domocratlc national adminIstration - Istration added $2G2OOOOOO to the in. tcrCl ; bearing debt , and none of the money wont Into any grent public worl" MI' . Cleveland has heen tellIng - Ing bow It was done , but the people nro moro Interestell In pro venting' a repetition of the fect. . . . , . AND Nearing the LJmlt. "Do you know , darling , " said the loveslel. young man who walt bus ) planting microbes , "that I bollevo It mnles mo n better mnn every time J kiss 'ou ? " "WolI , " rejoined the tnrty.lullred girl In the parlor Reene , "at the pace you are going now there will soon bo no Dloro room for imlrOVoment. " The Truth Comes Out. "I say , Adam , " remarked Darwin , as they met on the golden aldownlk one morn In ) ; , "how about that pot bobby or mlno ; dill the original man really have a tall ? " "Suro ho dhl , " rel1l1ell..Adam , "but not the Itlnd 'Oll alludClI to In tryln : : to 111ulto monley of yourselt. It was just an ordlnarr , every.dny tale of woe. See ? " Poor Manl Hubby-Half of him belongs to you. you lenow. WIfe-O , well , lot my halt hollerl- Chlll1. Not Due to Gravitation. Newton evolved tbo law ot gravity. "That may do for nn apple , " exclaimed - claimed the rivals , "but why do th smallest berrle.s fall to the bottom ot the box ? " Sadly 110 was compelled to aclmowl. edge the partial falluro of his Bchome , -New York Tribune , Not a Regular Game. "Llttlo boys , " said tbo ohl lady n8 shq stopped and loolted ever the fence , "don't you lenow YOIl shouldn't' play n hall game on Suuday ? " The catcher loolted around. "This ain't no game , mn'l1m , " ho said. " 'Vo'ro short. our reg'lnr pitcher. " Loyal to the Last. Woren't you slightly annoyed by the ml\nner In which your wlto ptayed when she was 'our partner nl whist ? " "No. " answered Mr. M ltton stoutly - ly , "I wasn't annoyod. I was puzzlod. I couldn't help wondorlng who made that fool assertion about its bolng wrong to trump your partner's ace , " Worse Than it Crime. "Yoll scem angry , Mr. Pocle. "I am. The Inspector of weights and measures has just been in. " "Ha , hal Ho caught YOII giving 15 ounces to the pound , did ho ? " "Worso than that. He said I'd been giving 17.-Stray Stories. L.adles' Day at the Club. Evangellno atchlng sight of a bat fiylng about the room-Isn' It atrango to see a bat hero ? Arthur ( half reminlscently-I ) guess you don't lenow this club-lndianl1p- ! ells Nows. Knew His Business. Romantic Rosalie ( at the recevtlon ) -That young man over by the lllano is just too Idlllng for anything. Practical Paullne-Suro ho is. He owns a big slaughter house in Omaha. Taking Him LIterally. I I I . . . "Would ) 'ou 111\0 the cause of 'our late husband's death oxplalned on the monument ? " "Wel If it don't cost any moro , yon might engrave a couple of cucum- hers 011 it-Hour Glass , Leap-Year Maid. "Dllt as ho novel' said ho would marry you. " remarlwd the wIdow , "I' tall to see where the breach of promIse - Ise comes In , " " 'Vher.t I proposed to him. " ox- plalned the leap.year maid , "ho promIsed - Ised to bo a brother to me , and ho . bAsn.t been anything of the ldnd. " tit , How to be Happy. They were spealtlng of the actress. "Yes , she's married , hut her hus. band travels with ono company andl she tra yels with l4:1otber. " " 'fhen they snrely ought to have a happy marrfed life. " Cash Vs. Credit. JUdge-What Is the prisoner charged with ? Policeman-Ho's fnll ot whisky. your honor , but whether he's charged with the sturt or whether he pal < l cash. I can't sa ) ' . Snw the Human Fright , Maull-Dill 'ou hear n\l t .that fright George got on his wodd111f IlY1 , Mabel-Yes , I was thero. 1 It'\W 'tor.