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Custer County Republican
III
" ' ID , M. AM8111t1UtY. . 1t f 'cu .t I' UUSI ItV ,
, t ,
r rnnOKEN BOW , N 13R.ASI\A
il UI\\'nnn hns follnd thnt It IIn's to
Itel'p clrnll.
i. . .
_ , _
'l'here IIrc .IUIII uf. IIl'ople who couhl
! .
tnlk well 'If. tW , ) ' Imew whllt to tall ,
huu t. \
' 1'ho trouhlc Wlt.h peolle , whll hn0
f ; ' , holes ; \ 1M fhnl fhe ) ' 11)\\11)11 ) wnnt ) ' 011
to rltle wllh thelll.
. '
. . A gerlll hus I dlsco\'el'cd thnt
1 KellC'rntc8 0 fer(1 frenz } ' hllllclltt'll
, b"n mnd desire to haul up carpels IIJld
f\ 8CI'ub ( Joorfl" 1(1 ( J . " , ,
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A mol1enl ph'slclnn sn's when n
; 1I111n hllH l'hel1luntlsm tuere I\l'e hut two
' thh F.8 he Cllll tlo ; he cnn Jrln ntHl henr
I It , , pr. benr It nnll not grin ,
f4 ,
' : \ How cnn Uncle Snm crltlclsc the dll ,
. ' I1tory tnctlcs IHlr8U ( > d hy tlie Sill 111 II
r \ Vln he bhnlClC has just 1111111 nil
J , 11 WIU'll . of damnges , 102 ) 'Ollr/l / old ?
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i The Knlser woultl rc/pcctfully gIve
the world to ulHlerstnnd thnt III the
, lI1 tter of beIng chumm ) ' with the
' : . 1"O.\e \ ; P ! < 'Rhlent Iloosevelt Is 1I0t till'
' - whQI9 clwcse. .
" ,
Unce suicide mllY not be n chnrncter-
Jstlc of Kentucky , bllt the frec nllll un ,
lIrqlt l sort or murder In which till'
nut"es ! now nud , pwn Indlilge unlf\\'C\'g :
! mU , b c rnme purpoS < ' .
Dr ; I.yntall Abbatt hns thra\\"ll Adnm
a \'U l' bon I'd , Oh , see here , naw , this Iff
too much ! We lire wlllln to. . compro'
mise by tosslllg .Tonl\h to his wlullc ,
but' we mnlw n stnml r r Adnm ,
"
. It 'ou nre In daubt os to whnt to do. .
with , thnt spare doUur , sClld It to. . the
? A11l1ubon SDclet- , far protectlnt : the
wild blt s Is IlOt' anly In the IntCTeat
at plensurc nnd benuty , but af loeDn-
omy. :
i
The Go\'ernor of Knnsas SIl8 be will
nPlDlnt no I11nn to. . omce who hns not
somcthlng Inld nwny far , n rnln ' dn ) ' .
Whlit' ilols ! 'the Gaverllor af Knnsos
thlrll' 'pl'Ople' , vant pUhllc btllces fOl' ,
unywnr : ?
James B. MnrkumVIIS shot fr0111 behInd -
hInd in Kentucky the other day. He
Is the thirty-first victim af the feud
with whlcli he III Identified. It Is hall'
ed this reud wm soon be ended now ,
I\S Dnl ) ' a tew or the pnrtles to. . It lire
left.
A Boston JUdge hns deeldl'll that n
mnn hns ns good a right to hiss I1t n
thentor 'ns to npplaull. lIe mny hnve
the legal right , but he never ought to
, c'xerCiso It. SlIellco Is 1l1e worst SOl't
af "frost" that can strUt ( ! 11 pIn ) ' In
these dnys. '
A mO\'Cl11ellt hns been stl1rted In
I rnncc to decrcnse the Intnntlle del1th
fIlte so ns "to pro\'lde the requisite
1I111 ll.1er at recruits tor the nrlllY , " B '
thctwn ' , which Is the bott Jr WilY. to. . let i
n bnb ) ' dlo whllo In sWllddlln ; clathes '
ar to. . hn'e It grow up to he shot ?
A , Landon surgcon declnres thnt the
' ) leol1le 'of ' the present genemtlan nre
hecomlllg'ery neuro.tIc . : that they nre
mOI'ose , 1110rbld , nml thllt the ) ' tlJlnk It
. . rOI11Ulltic to Btenl uWI1Y. If the ' will
o\Is" ! stelll a < yay It Js not 'so. . hnd , It's
tht' 'f llow Uutt steals n chlclwn , or 11
hank's f111l1is , or a franchlfie thu Itcep
the' warlll's thou ht In disorder ,
I ,
[ qre thlln u tlIOUSIU1 Penns'I\'nnla
mlnql's , "slt'Uek" the other da ' to de
,
l'IdQ the q11l'stlDn wheth r or not u ,
111'111) ) , < ' : Is Il\rt of n l11ule'q horness" 'l'I c
trou)1e ) rDse from the refuBnl af I'he
stnlllel11en to. put on ille brll1les. Hef-
C'l'eesrl'C01lnH1ded ! thnt the 1I\uleR ho
dl'lnm without brl1les , and their sug-
rstloll WI1H ndopted. Theil the 1I1en
"a1l\c hacl ; : . 'ho 111ulos huye pass ll I
\'ate uf thanls. ; :
Corpentcrs who wer rCIIl\lrlng the
1\lIry WnshlngtOli 1.1 OU ! it' , apIIDslte
I rcdcrlclsl)111'g ; : , recently found In thl'
l''lIIng n sl1lull hatchet of pecullnr
Nhnpl' . 'he ' beglln to tulk of the
cherl" , } ' trI.'o IUtel the smnll ho ' who
l'oulll 110t tell a lie , and nn old negl'O
WOI1\U11 WIIS round who l'ornel1lhel'C
scclng Gl'orge hide tile hlltchet u1't1'
Its fnmou8 nchleyemcut. But-n11ll so
t hl' romnUCe ( lIsnllpears from lICe-
WashlngtDn " 'ns n gl'OW ( , ruun bl.'fare
his 11\0ther houl.ht t11 bOIW . AlIIl th ,
chl'rl' ) ' tree hatchet Is stilt "nfoU1IIl , Ill ,
though It hI not u11houord or1IHung ,
: : WI.t
You nl'Vl'r llCurd of p. trUl allhul\l
thnt hnd rhe\11UutlslU uU It rl'uchod
\ captJYlty und WI1S kC'l1tilt the c'urth.
You nO\'r henrd of n llOJe thnt hnl !
rheul1\llthim untl11t 'WI1S I'JI d wHb Irpn
and kept off the crtb. . . Tau 110YOr
hoard of 11 doS thnt bn , rhelllnntlllm
untlJ It became n houMbolt1 pet and
. wns pnmpered-I'l'pt err the cl1rth ,
be heathe118 ot' ' AfrIca and the Pncl11c
1f\landB no\'er hnd rheumnUsm , so. . for
r.s we know , until they ot to. . wcarln
snndnls Dr shoes. 1 once kneW' a fool
mlln wbo , , , 'll1 never ho got sIck , would
dIg a trench III his gnrden , lie down In
It and hnyo his wire CDV r him with
trcth : ! earth ns tnI' up t. hJ chIn. ne
would remnJn there for un houl' Or ,
two , then get up In fine spirits. 1\other ,
eartbl The contl1ctl It looked IIIw the
resurrectlon-oIlll It wns. Let all tile
boys go bnrefootl-d.
Mrs. John G ; Carlisle , wlie ot tilE
former Secretar. } ' or thl ) Unltl'd stateE
Trol\sury , the other dn ' snt on thl' ns ,
pbnlt pavement on lrlrth n yen lie , Ney. .
York110ldhll ; In her : Inp the hend nn
loothlnE' the Imll ) ot one or her 110rse
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thn t hncJ slipped , broken n blaad rCRAf'1
I nlill11S d'llIg. It wnsn't n dlgnlfic
IIr "COrl'"tII" 0 ttltllle Car n grent society
IIHI ) ' , wns It ? And mtth nyenue , olon"
I ollol1t 1'hlrt ' , fourth street , where thla
IlCcullllr spectnclo occurred , Is such 11
Ilul ll pllic l 111 t'tie little whllo that
: Ir . Cllrllsle Mt there on the pare-
IMllt , hollllll the 11.'lns horse's hend ,
hUlldl'elis of fine Inlllcs , mnle nnd tc.
mnle , InUBt h1\\'o swept hy In their tlno
cnrl'lnJtes , IItnl'ted In , mncIIIent Hnd
1CIIl11l1cII : "How horlchlHly Improv-
( ! I'I" IIl1t It 19 not IIk'I ' thllt dlsa I'
IH'O\'ln , ; llIncolI or I'l'mllrl'8 dlBI\\rhcd
the (100(1 ( SII rnn 1'1 1.11 n , She hne ! ( or the
m01l1l'nt 1'1'1I8l'l to ho the tine society
Inll ) ' I1ncl hllll heeol11o lhe'omnn , 1'110
thill , shiny veneer of conventJonnllty I
hllll fl1l1en 11 WilY , nnll n rel1t , warm" I
trl10 , henrt wnR eXlloll'I , Peolile ml\ " : I
Inu h nt the Impl1lslve frankness at. a
trill' hCII rt , hut the t1'\10 henrt Imo.W9 .
tllI' ) ' nr ! ! hut shnllow fools , 'l'hnt spec.
I1Ic1u of one of the Il'ndlng women ot.
tlw lallll slttlng'un the Imvmnent or thOi
( , OUlltl' "S most' fnshlollllhle thoro\1gh-
fore , ellslng her Injured horse's denth
pllngs , mllY Inck dignity , trom some
\'lewllollltR , but from the true human-
IIlIrllln'Iwolnt ) It hRs n supreme dignity -
nity thnt Is borrowed rrom hlgb beav.
en.
en."A
"A tom" u'nn9 something Indlvl8lbl
but the chemlcnl I1tOI1l hns belled Its
nnme , 'I'he atom ot h'drogen , tlll )
fll11allcst nnll lightest of tl1em nil , J/1
now helleved to be IIlnde up of nbou
sevcn hUlldrcd "clectrons"-n nnm
Jlven to the ultlmnte pllrtlcles at mnt , ;
ler , I'llch of which Is chllrged with elc > c-
h'lelt ) ' , 1'horo IH , p rhnls ) , no gronder
conception of tlte constlt\1.1Ian of nutt-
tel' thlln Is thllt Hot fOl'th In a recent
lechn'c h ) ' Sir Oll\'er Lodge , one or the
foronlost men of science of o.ur . time ,
lIe IIsls us to consider nn ntom of an ) "
clement ns nn Infinitely IIttlo salnr , "
R 'stem. It the clech'oll be cancelyed
of ns hn vlng the size of the full stol }
a t the end of this Ientence ! , the size eton
on utom of hydl'gen will be thnt o.f . IL
church ono hundred I1nd sixty feet
lon , el hty fe t bl'oad nnd forty feet
high. I.css thnn n thollsa11l1 elc > ctrons
occupy the IItom , In the sense that nn
nrmy accuples n countr ) ' . 'hey pre-
ycnt lin.'thlng else from enterIng : tbey
mnlte the ntom Impenetrllble , nlthough
they do not fill a trllltonth pnrt o.f . th
space with theIr nctunl substnnce : , The
olectrous nre In vIolent motion nmong
thl'U\Belves , hn vlns n speed probnbl ) "
onotenth that ot lIght-thousands , at
miles II seconll , Yet there Is little dan-
Iter or colltslo.n . , tor the electrons uro
milch further apart In pro.portlan . to
their size than arc the planets af o.ul" .
system. ' .rhus , sa ' 11 ; Sir 01l\'er , wo
ho\'e came to. . on atomic nstro.nomy . ,
unel he suggests the mnzlng thought
thnt there Is no such tiling as nbsoluto
stze , I\nd thl1t eyen solnr and Btnr sys.
tems mny be the atoms of a larger
unl\'erse. It seems a contrndlcUon In
terms to. . spcnk of tbe study of nn atom
ns n mentis of broadenIng the mind ;
hut where cnn one find n higher flight
or the tl1ney thnn In the Idea ot thnt
otom ns n sph'e of maUan at n specd
whIch the humnn mind cnn hllrdly con ,
cetye ?
I .
If n cheerful prophet Is to be bellev.
cd , the dl'eall scourge of cansumptlon
will within n'er ' few } 'el1rs be en.
Urel ) ' wiped onto 'he limit bns been
set ut m ) 'enr9 for Prusstn , a 1\(1 20
) 'enl'f ! Inter thnn thnt tur Englftnd ,
Amerlcn Is not In' the reclconlng , 'l'ho
cheerful prophet Is Alfred lIlIIler ,
whose I1rtlcle , cl1r full - rortlflc willI
stndHlIcs , Is cnuslnr ; profou1\lest In ,
terest muong Hclontlsts of l urope , nnl }
hns Just been repnbllshed In Amerlcnn
[ edlclne. IIlIIler's nrtlcle Is the boldJ
l'Ht II 1111 moot specIfic proclamotlon yeU
mnlle of the thcor ' thn t consmnpUon
hils he n mustered , ITe presents n stn.
tlHlIcul chnrt showing thnt lit the pn.'S'
cot rate of decrooso de.1ths from pnl.
monnr ' tuberculosis will cease In Prus ,
IIln In nbout t.he ' ,
: ) 'ellr 1027 By tbts
tlmc , he orguos , the cUscnae will hn , = 0
111''I'c'used - greotly In Englnndllso ,
'thoug-h the donth rnte from It thON
will 1 > tlll he I1bout 8 per 10,000 , WithIn
20 'l'I\rs more , ho MYS , I < ngland , taa ,
will he frol' 1'1'0111 It. 'l'he figures upon
wh\t'h \ Ir. Hillier' bases his conclusIons
tell 11 IIln uslble fitory. 'rho PruBslnn
stntlstlcs do not del11 with tllC phthlsl
rnte nlone , but wIth all the deaths freml
tuhel'cnloslR. ' .rhe decline or this rate
to any notlll1l' extent bl'gKlt In 188\ }
/lnl1 Iml\ \ been \'er ) ' rapid since thnt
lime. l ro1l1 187to ( \ 188G tlle rn te wn
31 IICI' 10,000 , In ] 887 the drClp begn1\ ,
nnl1 conthl\1l'11 110wn to 1000 , lhe I1nte
of the stntlstlcal report , when It hull
fallen to 21 per ] 0,000 , ITI England ,
111 the SII1110 Jlcrloll , the drop wns from
21 to m , 1'he rOJild tlill In the Prus.
slon rnte Is nsrrtbed to tbree cnuses :
(1) ( ) To tllO precautlans ngl1lnst Infec ,
tlOUR dlsense , lIue to. . the IlI8co\'er ' o.r .
the I\lbl'rclo bacillus. (2) ( 'o the 1m ,
IH'O\'el1 conditions of tllO wDrltlng
rlaHsl'8 thlo to the worlcmhn's Stnte In
surunee In ws. (3) ( ) 1'0 the estn hll8h ,
l11'ut af sanltnrlmlls. In the United
Stnte'S the dl'nth rate ( rom tuberculosis
Is trl hUull ' bl h nnd Is suit ! to be In ,
crcnsinR.
A Hernlllllor ,
Jul1lf-'l'hc ) fn ' that wllOn n mnn
rncl's a 5\\dllell 1111nger 1111 the e\'enta
ot. his Iast lito Imss 0\01' ,
II'ul1ge-'l'lInt "a ? Well , let us go out
In my nutomoblle.
"Wh ' ? "
"Well , the Hl1l1l1en donger ml ' brIng
h ( > roro ) ' 0\11' mlud the 1'nct Umt 'ou
bOI'ro\\'el r.o from me severn I ) ' ( ' 1\1'8
and you'ye rorgot to ' "
ngo pn It.-
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Dnlthnarc lle1'l1ld.
'rho aVl'I'nge mlll1 ne\'r , vlslles he
were a w011111n , hut hI' 11l1mlts n 1Itt1
I enyy or hl'J' whc'.l1 ho bellns to get
bnld. .
When n wontnn Is good to her kin ,
ahe Is hcttl'r to them thnn Bhc is to beJ
hus\oud.
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LET US ALL ] JA UGH.
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JOKES FROM THE PENS OF VA.
RIOUS HUMORISTS.
1 > 1 ellllll II t IIIchlcllt8 Uccurrllll : the
" 'orld U\'cr-fnylll&:11 : ! thutAre Cheerful -
ful to 0111 or 1'ollll\-I'UIIII ) ' ! : Jclcc.
tlolI ! ! thnt 1'011 Will'gnjo ) ' .
"Yoll 11'11I to Ill' ellju'ln IIllllHunlly
good 111'111111 , " 1111111 the frlelld of the
rUIIIII ' . " 'I'hl' Inflt I'lule I WIIS herc yall
\\'CII' ! ! 1111 1IJlIhlRt n sc\C'e nl talk ! of
11Y"III'III-4II1. "
" ' 1'hll t's l'l ht , " replied the jovlnl hend
of thl' hOlil-lc'lIolcl. "I bunlwcd the un.
Ilertnlwl' out'or n joh , nil l'lght , nil
l'l ht , "
"How 11111 ' ( ) II l1Iunn e It ? " \\'UR the
( l'lelllll ' I II tCI'l'ogn t or ' ,
"I ot hold o ( 1I1 ' wife' ! ! cookhook
IInd ! IIude II houllr ! ! of It , " was the Hlg-
nllll'ullt flllly ,
Nnt l vclI n CoulJlIlrl80ll ,
I.n Iontt-Ycs , I hellrll IlIul11 Ills.
chnrglllJ ; a HI.lnch gUll the othl'I' IIliy.
Ln Io'ne-You dlel nDt StCOll l11uch
dllitm1ll'd h ) ' the rumll\1s ,
I.n Iolltt-No , I henrll m ' wife Ilia-
ehurglllg th eOc > k llCfore I left hOl11e ; ,
Allme OM Ulet.
"lIaw I11nll ' 11101lls 110. . they hn\'e nt
) 'OUr 1Ionrlllng II01Ise , ? " usked the \ > oRall1
friend.
" 0111' , " repllell tHe hanrder , Rnlll . ,
"Whl1t II1clII Is limO"
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"Ontmenl. "
An I xplauntlou.
Mllcs-JIaw dill De .Tones get to I
such n contrl11ed } womnn hntel' ?
Glles-Oh' . he'ns a floarwnllel' In
n Ill' ) ' oods stare for se\'en 'eUrR ,
The CO"IltcuoIIH lUcdn ! .
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Pianist-you see thase amnII mednls ?
Well [ those rol' . 'the
, got pln .lng pillna
when I wns In Germnn ) ' ,
Chorus-But the .Inrce one , Herr
IInh' , how clld you get that ?
I'll1nlst-Oh , thnt one , the peaple In
our lint gn ye me thnt for not pla 'lng
Ill'ound home ,
They \Vulltell Her to Go.
"Yes , dau htel' Is going nhrnad to
contluue hm' studies lu singing : '
" [ ndeed ? "
"Yes , gYel' .body In OUr lint con-
trlbutell to n funll to send Il'r to. . Berlin -
lin , The , ) ' were 1111 so. . kind. 'I'hey
w/lnted her to go liS soun liS posslblo
ul1l1 Hume af them snld they'd be glud
to scnd her stili fnrther , Aul1 whcu
[ IIRlte11 them If tll ( , ) ' wouldn't miss her
yulce the ' IHlmlttell thnt they would
fUI' u time. Alld then the ' l1ulckl ' lulll-
e(1 ( thllt of CO\11'Re this mustu't stand lu
the wn ' of her going. And old jlr.
Bnl-lcomb salel , lu his serious \'olce :
'Whnt Is our gnln Is Berlin's loss. ' O (
COUl'i1' : he meuut It the othel' wu ' , lIe's
. .
so L'ullll-Clmelnnd : I'lulu DenIer.
COlllllu't Uo " 'orllc.
"Youllg mUll , " snl1 the stern futher ,
"do 'ou think ) 'OU U1O : III 11 position to
SUIIIOrl ) m ' 11uughter In the st 'le td
which she hUR heeu accustomed ? "
" l1I'e thing , " replied the Imo\\'ln
) 'outh , "Whr , oul ) ' lust weel ; : sIll ! 1'e-
fURt'd to OCCU1ll1IllU ) ' me to the thente1'
becauHe Hhe had nothlug to weal' , "
ner 1 lr t ImlrcR lol1.
"Whn t Is thl1t numher on his auto-
'
1110blle ? " ,
" " 'h ) ' , , Tl'nnle , that Is the uumhel' of
the mnchlue. "
" 1IIIl ( > ( 'I1 ! I thou ht It was the' nUI11-
bel' of III'OII.c ) he hud run dawu. "
I lie h7new. \ .
= " " - & . : " ' - - : . . . : . : . .J
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[ rs. 1l1l .tall--Jh'l1m , what Is 1gilt -
cdjelllr1\'est1lll'nt ?
,
IIu 'top-'al , [ guess Illil how It's a
gold bl'lel ; : , Iaud. } ' .
I > rosrrcRlllyc.
I
GlIes-D - the WII ' . what became of
tbnt fellow SI.hlue111 who wns In the
conI ) ) USIr1P8/i hC'I'o Illst wltlter ?
MlIes-Oh , he soll1 out nbout u mouth
no I1nl1 went to Arlzonn. I.\st I hea1'll
o.r . him he wes In jnll ror I'obblug ,0
stuge eooch.
011es-In other worlls , he evoluted
tro111 a light weighman a highway ,
mnn.
_ -\R It hollh1 ne ,
IIusllnnd (1l11'lng ( the 81'I1t-Oh. ) well
\ a mun Is HUl'llOsl'd to tell 11 few lie !
when he Is dolng'l1 courtship stuut.
. Wlfe-Yel1 , 1 SUllllotie 10 ; but It's11
to him to ref 01'11lifter he gets n1l11'
rled. '
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1 > rcHIIIIIII\I' ' ttCJlII.
Plng-Wlmt III tilt' irtit thing to d (
In learnlug to l'Ull IIn . . .t011lohllo ?
l'ong-'l'lle ! th'st thln Is to j.t t ) 'OUI
lIfo InHurcll 111\(1 \ the 'll'oIHl ! Is to hnY4
IU1 obelle bnnk rail fOI' I'elmlrs ,
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8hollll1 II. I ucoura.cd.
"HuJlIIU eialet the benutltnl girl , 1 I
IIIII ut th cllRtnnt stnrs , HSUPPOBO
this olcJ eurth should 8top revolTing ? "
"Not while we ere together , " ho
whlsllCred , slipping his ann nround
her.
her."And
"And wl1) ' not ? "
" ! lecuuse 'Io\'e I11riIeC ! ! the we-rId go
' ' "
l'oul1l1.
In the Wool , . " 'ellt.
"Go In and tell the editor I am out
here with n harsewht ! } , " cried the h'\t
cltl7.ell ,
"He'll he'er ' glad to henr It , " re-
11111'11 1 he aUlce ha ' , "He'll jU8t take It
n\\'u ' fl'011l ) 'OU lIud sell It. Wo 11Ild an
uuctlun UII here IIIRt week and sold
d07.en , "
Jlnruynrd IlcJlartec.
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Little Spring Chicken-How do' J
IDOk ?
0111 nooster.-.Flt to kill.
Gcncrall , . Uoell ,
SlIus-So Zele ; : cl1me Imelc trom cot"
I ( > gl' with 1. p , litter his unme. Whnt
110es thllt I11I'nn ?
C 'rus-jlel1lcnl doctor , of course ,
SlIl1s-I1'm ! I thought mo 'be it
nH'nnt " [ nnr Debts. "
'rhe Bvll.
jlr8 , A- [ wish rn ' husband wDuld
HIm \'C himself , ,
h'i : , Z-'l'hen ) 'an wIsh him to ecan-
omlze 'j
Irs , A.-No , It Is uot ecanomy. You
sl'e when'he goes down to the bnrber.
Hhop he relllS 011 th m old joltes In the
comic llapers nnd slH'lngs them nt
lJreulfnst ; : ,
Ilctort COllrteou. , .
II nslJl1 1111 ( durIn , ; I the sll\t-1 }
wouldn't he n fool If I were 'yon ,
Wife ( callUly- ) ' denr , I cnn read-
II ' IInllm'stond that If ) 'OU were me yon
wouldu't be a fool. '
An ther View of It ,
S 1e-A well.lmownnlter st 's thnt
In order to succeed a mnn lI1ust be D5'
per cent bockbone ,
lIe-Oh , I don't ImoA oad mony
who hnve mnnaged to. . nrrlvc are { ) : S per
cent check ,
TRkin It Out on the Family.
Mrs , Ferguson-Gearge , what partlc.
ulnr fulling of yours dl the preacher
touch on In his sermon this mo.rn- .
In ? )
: \1' : Ferguson-Whnt do 'ou nsk mti
that question for' !
Irs. I ergusan-ne l1use ) 'au hay ! }
been ns cross ns n bear eyer slncc you
came home from church ,
RCIlI , . Wit.
. . -
Blnl.s ( a coal dealer-I'1I1 ) getting
11 wfull ' hen y ' ,
.Tlnl'H ( lln Iccmnn--Yau ) don't look It ,
I gucss ) 'ou'\'e been wel hlllg 'aurselr
OI ) ' 0111' o\\'n scnles ,
Heroic UO- ,
[ omml1 ( returning fl'om 11 BholplnA )
eXlledltion down to \'n-WI\nt ) \ on cnrth
has happenel ] , Willie ? Hns' the hauso
heeu on ll1'e ?
Willie-Nome. Them unlter
dUl'ed me to. . rilln the goat nround till
parlm' 111111ul ) and down the stl1lrs , anI
I wOII't tukc n dlll'e fram nobod ' !
In the Glolllltinl : .
'fher were sitting all ulunc on the olq
rUBtic porch ,
'nil ! 'aun man wns'er ' hnshCul.
"n'on't 'au Iwow , " ho said. finnlly ,
mOl'e to hrenl , the mDnoton ' thun ony.
thing else , "some people lire meau
enough to thin ) ; : I 11m n frenk 1"
" " 'cll. " l'elllle < 1 the pretty girl , witI'
-
a 'I1\\'II , " [ think } 'OU nre "omethlll 01
nn 'l11'mleBR wonder' myseIC. "
He tool ; : the bll1t.
"
Unhln"c1 CrltlclHIII.
"Whnt do . } 'OU thlnl , [ ought to gel
fOl' thll.l ) lnlntlng " uslted tile \'er3
j'ou'n ortlst ,
"Well , " relll d the , mntter-of-fnct
f1'lend , "I think any jUdge would be
jusUtlcd lu glvlug } 'Ol1 nt lenst slr
mDulhs , "
NatnrnllJlIIOlitlon ,
"Itoss , " snlel the 01 < 1 man , "I kno"
I ) ' 0\1 IIro cngaged to thnt young ludy
111111 clIlI on het. c\'er ) ' IIlght. "
"Whnt af thnt1" Ilsled the youth II ]
'
the Ingrowu hnt. ,
l "Wcll , er-\ruulcl 'ou mind gl\'lng nH
nil lIH' chl1rs that get brDken In yom
\'est 1101.'Iet. 'j"
Hol1o'iJ Gnrden , '
, Now In U\11' IIIt1e arden plot
; Belle dllos 111111 pll\nts with joy ; I wet
1 t will nllt th'u 111C 1I1nch to bo
) For 1110st 8ec H dou't come UP. yO\
- Imow.1
: \nkell Good.
"lsu't JI111llluU a 'oul1slooldng mnl
I Cor his ajc ? 110's ( } , and be docsn'
1001 ; : 11 dll ' O\'C ! ' ,10 , "
l' " .A1HlI'0111HhneR , when you hear bIn
J tnI ; : , 'on'd thlnl , he wl1ln't a d
lover [ I. "
. . . . "
. "
c . .
.
,
+ , . . . . t . , . . . + + + + + + + . . . . . . . , . II t I .t'fuI' +
,
, : C 0 0 D " . .
. . . ' , . '
'
3b f.Stotie $ .
+ + oH.HH. . + + + + + H"1 , . ,1 . . t eo . . .
An A1111'IrI1U tal11'lst who cnlleel on
Hollc'l't 1I11I'IIS' wletow , J l'an Armaur , a
( ' 1m' 'I'II1'ti I flcr Itls death , hnel the
11 llll:1 : I'll ) ' to' nsl { Iter : "Clln 'O\1 show
: tIt UII ' I'cllclof ! the poet ? " "Sir , " an ,
HWtI'I'd ! t he old loel ) ' , with 111ujestlc ,
IlIglIlI ) ' : "I II1U tlw enl - relict of Uob-
' HIII'n . "
el't ! !
Chlll'lcs II , . nl'oolfleld SI1YS he wns
In Htl'\'tnBuuS ! : C0I11IJ1111Y at the moment
W 1(111 tllc gOl'1I1 of the Idtn ! of "Dr.
,11'1 : ' 11 an 1 Ir. 1I\'de" , Wit ! ! coucelved _
tl'\'ln on'US In\'ol hlng I\Jrnlnst n
1111111 with whqm he Imd done business ,
nlHI with whose methods he was clls-
I-IU t Islled. ' 1'he mlln'nnml ! wns SllIn.
lIel CI'e Ju 1 , or sonwl.hlug 111:0 ; : It. "lIe
Iii 11 mlln who tr'ndes on the Snnmel , "
11'\'eIlSon derllll'ed In his ruther fin ,
nld. ) ' , musical Scot's'olce , "IIe re'
cel\'es 'U1'lIh 8nl11\1I'l's smile an his
fnce ; with the go t\l1'e af Samuel he
111\'ItC'8 rou Into. . 11 chair : with Sal11uel's
o 'es enst dawn In selfdeprecntlon , he
tells ) .U\1 lIuw well slIllsfled his clients
hl10 I1tWII 'S heen with hIs del1l1ugs :
\ut ' ' ' nnd tllI'n ' cntch
) m'el' ) now 'O\1 n
glimpse of the CI'I' l\n peellng out
IlIte u white felTet. Creg nu'H the real
1I1un ; SOl11uel's only suptrllclul. "
On April Fool's dn ' , the nudlence at
nn amutcur dramutlc 11l1'farmnnce lu
the Xn\'nl Acndem ' lit Annnpolls wns
startled whl'n one af the InHtructors
mnde his nllpenrance before the C1\1'
tnln IIhout the time the performance ,
WIlS to. . hegln. und solemnly nnnounced :
"i wl h to mal\O I1n UnnOI1lleen1Cnt-n.
\ ' r ' ! 'nd anllOUnCel11ont. UncleI' tilt. !
cIrcumstances It Hcurcel ) ' cems lit-
tln thllt the entertnlnment should
proceecl. WOI'd hns just heen recel\'ed
thn tone oC the nil \ ' ) "S'essels hall
gone down with ull on bo II 1'(11 " A hush
of hOI'I'ol' followed this ra'el ' dellv-
m'ed ! > ) leech , for most of those In the
audience were connl'etecl by close fnm-
Ity tlos with the nn"What wes
the nl1l11e of the \'essel ? " cnme a'olce
from the I'ear of the hall , "The sub-
mnrille bOllt IIollnnll , " replied the Instructor -
structor , ns he dodgcll und mil de n.
hnRt ) . exit , .
Francis E. Leupp snys tbnt probably
thV shot'test RICeclt eyer dl'lIyered In
Cangl'ess wns mnde b ' "nen" Butler ,
of l\IlIs uchusetts , An OhIo memher
hud fallen IIfaul of him one dn ' , nnd
pO\l1'l'l upon hll11 n torrent of ubuse
which would have excited geum'nl In-
dlgul1 tlon but far nn unconsciously
ridiculous gesture with whIch the orator -
tor accompanied nftuost every' niter-
nllte sentence ; this temlered ) the dls.
gust of his hen reI's with mirth. He
would rulse his urms just ns high
abo\'e his hend as possible , and then
wrIng his hunds ns If , he were mnklng
a delirious nHempt to. . wring them off ,
Uutler sut through the speech with his
e 'es half closed , nat movln u muscle ,
IIe rose when his assl1l1nnt finished ,
nnd stood cuhnl ' In the nlsle , After
pm'lmps 11 minute af silence he begllu :
" [ r , SIH'I1Iel' ; : ! " Another hnlrcHl-llve )
pmlRe , IInd eXlectllnc ) ) ' reaclwd IIcnrly
the hnrstln ) lolnt. BUIdeul ) ' I'll Ising
Ills IIrms , BUtlCl' rl'lll'oduced eXllctl ) '
the IIwful gesture of the Ohio con.
gressman. ' , I'lten his nrms fell to his
Rldl's , HIlI ] far nnot her minute he stDod
silent. " ' 1'hnt Is ull , jr. Speaker , " he
sl1lcl fI nil 11) ' , und sut down ; "I just
wunte1 ! to unswer the gentlemnn fl'om
OhIo , "
'ro PUIIIIKuto at Ren , I
Plnn ' , ! huve ) ) el'n IH'I Hented by th , , ;
gelwral ml1nllger of the jll'xlcun-Amel' .
, lelln Stellmshlll Co. . , to the sureou. ; en.
eral of the llUblic IWlllth 111111 mlll'lne
husplll1l SIr\'lee whlr'h pI'o\'Ice ] for the
estllhllshm(1nt. ot u 1I0lltlng fumllntln , ! ;
plant , the tlmn rOllul1'od 1'01' fumlgllt ,
Ing'ofsels while In trl1l1slt being de.
ducted ( I'om the lI\'e dn 's thl' ' nre re ,
Ilul1'ed to relllnin In 1\Ulrl1Utlne before
lwln ! ; I1110wed to come 111' ' to the city
of Xow Ol'leans , 'l'he :1(10)ltl01l ) of Ol' ; !
scheme would , It Is nsserted , relltly
fncllltnte the Intercolll'se hetween New
OI'lellm ; IIncl Centl'lll nUll South Amer ,
hI1 : ! ! IIUI'tS. 'l'l1ls Is of pUI'tlcuhu' can : ,
sequence just now since the Chinese
Commcrclul Co , hns IHlt1ptt'cl u short
route to New Ol'lennH hr s1cumel's snll ,
Ing to llIl1znnlllo , hlRtenl ] of to Snn
FI'anclsco , as Iwretofol'c , - New Yo 1'1 ,
Iedlcnl Journlll , '
An O"CIIsht ,
"It WIIR n Htlle Iwerlef-if ; of me'ull ! ' ]
FlU'ntel' C01'l1tossel. "A tittle Iwcr ,
Icss. "
" " 'hat's the mnttm"t" asked hIs wll\ ' ,
"Do. . 'ou remember IIIHt 'eal' when I
WI1S Ilrnrln' Cui' rl1ln ! "
"Yes , but the 1'1\111 didn't 11rt'I\'e
theu. " ,
"No , but here It Is now , I ought tQ
ha\"e hel'n u little mOI'I' exncl 111 pecl
f 'II1' the ! 1nte.-WI1f ; lll1gt)11 S1ill' .
Pin ) ' of ] ; ; .lIson'8 l\J 11111.
' .rI1l' Jllo ' of 'l'ho111I1S A. l dlson'
I mlml I : ; liS wOl1dt'I'ful ns the Chlll'lIc-
tel'latlc wny 111 whIch he lIoes hI !
rendll1g , Outside af his techl1lcal 1'1'1111
I In ! ; ho Is 1'311 ' Id ue\'el' to. . loolt n t a hoe
unless It Is 111101\1'11 of to 111m II ) ' hiE
wife or same 1'l'lonll. 'l'lwl1 Ill' Hlq
dDwn nud 1'ealls ul1tll he has I1nl/hl' ' '
It ,
non'h. Papa a PI'I\.III'C.
I Benlrlcl.-So Ethel hils refused tl
eloJle wltb ChU'l'I1Cl' ? Whnt Is thl. t1'UU
ble ?
AgJl's-Oh. 1 rc'nll ' don't Imaw , Sh ,
) Is 1111\11 with hel' flltlll'r 11110Ut I'II1I\t ! : !
thing , I SUJlIIOSl.--l'lIcl { .
1 A 111n11 itm't lWCC'SIH\rll ) ' a ll IlI'ellC'a
r just becnuse be hnJ ! 1\ good 11l'ntl to'
11IUres.
.
.
CUTICURA
I
OINTMENT
-
Purest of Emollients an
Greatest of Skin Cures. I
-
The Most Wonderful CuratlvPi
of All Time
For Torturing , Disfiguring :
Skin Humours
-
And Purest and S Btest of
To II at Emollients.
Cutlcura Olntmen' 1. beyond qucBUon
t.ho most' sI1ccesaCu1 curathe ror tortur.
lng , dlstlguringhumo.urII . 01' the skin and
sca.lp , Jncludlng 108S or hnlr , ever-
compounded , In proor ot. whloh ft"
single anoInting precedcd by II. hot ba.th :
wtlh Cullcura SOlP. and fallowed in ,
th& severer cases , b , . a dose o.f . CuU-
cura. Resolvent , Is atten sufficient to.
llffurd Immediate rellcf In the most
dltltrcsping farms aC itching , bnrnlng
aud sCl\ly humollrti , pcrmlt r03t Ilnd
sleep , nnd point to Bpeedr cure whcn
all ather rcmedles ratl. It 1M especially-
80. . in the treatment af Infants Ilnd chtl-
drcn , clcanelnlJ , soothing amI healing-
the most dltresfllng af Inranttlo hu.
moars , and preserving , purlylu ! ; an
benutitylDg the skIn , ftclllp nud hair.
CutlcurlOlntmellt POSIICSeS , I1t the
Bame tJ ! , the charm at elltlsfylng the-
simple " , ants of the toilet , in caring for
the skin. scalp , 11alr , hands nd fect. .
from Infancy to n c , far mare Offl'Ct-
ul\lIy , Ilgrccnbly and economIcnl1y than.
the most'cxpcnsh'e af totlet em0111cnts.
Its "Instant rellet far skIn-tortured
babies , " or . . 8anlltlvcnntlscptlc cleans-
Inrr , " 0.1' . "One. night treatment at thE )
bands or fect , " ar It Single treatment ; .
( if the hair. " 0.1' . "U e after athlctlcs , ' "
cycllng , golt , tennis. rIdln , sparrlntr , .
or nny upart. each In conncctlon wltl1
thc use o.f . Cutlcnra Soap , Is sumctcnt.
cyldence at thlf ! . -
8014 tbrourbonUhtworld , CeUeura nflo\nnt,50 < )
rorm . , r ChMolaC..t.c1 1'111.,205. , "or . ,111 nf IVI ) , 1IC11J
m.a\ ' ' . Snol > . 2.\e , D.potl' Lo > ndnn , .11 Chartlhoal.
, . , . . . ' . . . Columbua ' "
tlq.ra" ' A Ru. d.l. I'll : DOI"'n.l
l'ort" Drul " Ch.m , "np. . h' . 1"01' ' " " . ' "
\ . - 1. , , < 1 ( or" TII. Cull.ur. Ikln DOCL"
Up A ainst It-I'ls your employer.
out ? " IDqulred the caller.
"Yes , sir , " replied the office boy ,
I' How do 'ou know without loolting
inte his prl\'ate ofI1ce ? "
"Because I just beard him growl.
about the cardS be was gettIu' an
can tor unother stack of blues'PbU' :
adelpbia Press ,
rennnuonllyCuet1 , 1'tontlorne"ousncftS"U
fiTS lint dAY' . u. . . of IIr , Kilno's Oreat ; lien" lto-
ltorer.Io'nd for J'U . : I .11,0" ' . , . Ial bottl. P.fut trutl _ .
DU. n. 11 , KLlNt : lII..II3I. . . . . . St..l'bIJnllelnbla. I. . . .
The fact is odd : The postotnce sav
In.gS bank ot Great llritlan arc tech.
nlchlly insolvent , Thclr deposIts at
tbe end of tbe yenr were $ ; 00,000.000-
ther ! assets only ubout $60,000,000.
Nobody worries about a little thing
l1Ip. that : th goyernment is respon.
sible' . Of course the dlsl"repancy !
rose trom tbe high prIces the depart.
ment was forced to pay for natloDa1
bouds beCore tbe Boer war. The-
lowerIng Ule rate ot interest allowed
Is an obvlolls cure. 'l'he postal banl:5o ; :
were authorized in 1881 and ncarly
$10,000.000 was deposittd the lirs-
year. Some Inter cleyelopments ar
curIous , Dy the "slip" 3ystem a sum
so small as two cents can be depos1t
ell. Depo51ts can he withdrawn hyt
telcgrJPll , School s\'iogs banks urq
reco nized , b.lt ore DOt very success-
fill , o" ll1 to the superIor attractior
or swects as a mcdlulU ot In\'est-
ment. A featurc of the postal b nics
Is that , througb their agcncy deposit.
ors can buy small tnctionel portlonB
tit government bonds.
,
BABY WEATHER.
Llttlc FcllowlI UOII't L11ce tlte Hot
Uay' ! . . \
Mothers sliould Iwo" , " cxactly whnt
lood to : :1\0 bahies In hot weather. '
, With tlle broiling hot duys In .TIII ) ' I\lId
Au utt the mother of n baby is alwu1J
IIn-Ious : for tllC health of her IIUle Oll
nnd 18 then particulnl'lr careful III Cce -
-lng. IIII. sourt ! Iluickl ) ' and other fooc }
. , unecrtnln , Bvcn ill spite of caution ,
81ckuess sOUleUmetl ertciis In and 1hen
, the ri'bt ; footl is more necessary tlla
'ever.
"Owr bab ) ' boy two years old llegan In
Ausust t'l hnvo ntt.jcl.s of t rrlble sti1\n-
llch 111111 bowel troublc , 'ho pbyslclan :
said his dll'-'Ition ! wes very bad IInd thn t
If It bad b I1 earlier In the summer and
hottcr weather we would surely have 108t
111m ,
"f'lually we ' : lYC baby Grnpeuls
Coo\1 , feeding It scnral times the lirst
; dn ) ' , IInd the next mornlnJ : bo sc-emelll
better nnd brIghter than be hRd been for'
many days , 'I'herc wns n & , rent chnn. . ! )
ia the condItion of his bowels und In
three dllY > > they were entlrel ) ' no1'mul ,
He IslOW wall nn Jietllng very strong
nn fleshy nnd we Imow that Grapc-
Ilts .antI his iiiI' , for be , , < \S n \ 'cry'.I' , { I '
\'cry III baby. Grllpc-Nnts food must
bave wonderful ' ! \ ' i
propcl't\S to en'cct such
cures 118 this ,
"Wo J'rownulls : ID our fnmlly 011 use /
Gr:1pe' ut8 nnd alto 1'01'tUIl1 In plnee '
ot coff , with the
! result tllnt we ne\'er
any of us lun' ( ! uny cofCI.'O Ills" hilt are !
well nntl stron ; . " nll1 ( ! given by Pos
tu Co" 11:11110 : CrcI'k. lich.
The reason GrllllU I
uti fDDll 1'0110 VI'S
bowel trouble In IJllhll'ti or ndults Is be- i. I
cnnse the I3tll1'eh of the grain III prrdl- t'r
, gited end dDt'K
' unt t/lX the 'bowcls , nor
ferment like whlro hroad , potatoM nnd
other forms of tt'lrl'h ' food.
Send for pl\l'th'I\I'II' \ hr lIlall of cxten-
8Ion of lIult' 0" f' " , ' ; ' : ; ' ) (1,00 cooks' con.
te''Ulr _ '
