Hemingford herald. (Hemingford, Box Butte County, Neb.) 1895-190?, April 15, 1898, Image 7

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Among the children ot the French
crcoleB of Louisiana there Is a very
pretty belief that their Easter eggs aro
brought to them by rabbits. Theso
dainty little creatures know nil tho
children and are perfectly aware which
of the younsters deserve tastefully-decorated
eggs, and which of them should
have eggs which arc merely colored or,
perhaps, entirely plain.
This belief that the rabbits bring tho
Caster eggs Is as strongly rooted In the
minds of the Creole children as aro
any of our good old notions concerning
Santa Claus and Christmas stockings,
and that there Is good ground for
the simple faith of the little ones will
be proved by the following story:
There were two rabbits, great friends,
who lived in a grove of live oaks not far
from a town. One of these was a young
rabbit, named Laplnlta, and she was
Very much excited one mottling because
the next day would be Easter, and her
companion, Lnplngro, had told her that
In the eurly morning she should carry
an Easter egg to some good child. It
was yet many hours before Easter
morning, and the two rabbits had not
provided themselves with an Easter
egg, nor had they decided to what
child they Bhould give It. Laplnlta
knew where there was a hen's nest. She
had examined the eggs, and she was
quite sure the old hen would give her
one, but they were not very large and
they were not very white, and she and
Laplngro wanted very fine eggs Indeed.
The two rabbits were still wander
ing through the woods, talking earnest
ly about the business on hand, when
they saw a beautiful figure approach
ing them. At first they thought It was
a woman, but they soon knew It was
not, for if It had been a woman even
the most quiet and most timid of all
jrentle Indies Uey would have been
frightened. But this charming figure,
which seemed scarcely to touch the
ground as she tripped gayly under the
under the trees and sat down, but
did not frighten them at all. They sat
up on their little haunches with their
little forefeet pressed against their lit
tle noses and with the tops of their
little noses trembling and wrinkling In
The figure bounded toward them and
vat down on the ground. "Oh, dear lit
tle rabbits!" she said. "How glad I
am to see youl You are the first friends
I have met since I came Into these
woods. I know you aro friends because
your noses wrinkle so affectionately. Do
you know who I am?"
"N, we do not," Bald Laplngro, "but
we Bhould be glad for you to tell us
Who you are."
"Very well, then," said she with a
charming smile. "I am a Dryad; one of
those beings who live In oak trees."
"In these oaks?" asked Laplnita, won-
"No, not In these oaks," said the
Dryad. "I have never seen any oaks
like these. I am a Btranger In this
country and these trees are not at
all like the oaks of my own land.France.
The branches of my oaks are ever so
much higher from the ground; they aro
larger, and they have no long beards
banging from their limbs."
"That Is moss," Bald Laplngro. "It Is
the goats that have beards, not the
"I am glad to have you tell me that"
said the Dryad, "because I know so
little about this country. This is the
way I hapened to come here: I lived
In a tall oak, which was cut down
by some people who were sending tho
trunkB of trees to foreign lands. Gen
erally, when a tree with a Dryad In It
Is cut down 8&o geis oui unu kucb i
some other tree, but I have always
wished so much to see foreign lands
that 1 thought it would be line fun to
tay In my trunk and go wherever the
people took it. And that Is the way
I hapen to be here. Everything Is bo
beautiful and I am glad to meet you
two dear little rabbits 1 Where are you
going? May I go with you7 I am look
ing for an oak tree to live In, but 1
don't want to llnd one yet."
Then Laplngro told the Dryad that
they wanted to get an Easter egg to
give to some good child early the next
taornlng, but they had not found an
egg yet which was good enough for
them, and they did not yet know what
child they would give It to.
"And I am to give It to the chlldl
cried Laplnlta, the top of her nose trem
bling with delightful anticipation. "I
have never yet given an egg to any
child. It will make me happy."
Tho Dryad was very much Interested
and when the rabbits told her that they
were trying to And a very large and
White hen's egg, she said she did not
think much of such eggs for Easter.
"Oh, If you could see the Easter eggs
that I have seen I" she exclaimed. "I
remember one that was brought to a
rich little girl who lived near the edge
of my forest. It was as big well, it
was as big as thatl" and the Dryad
held her hands about a foot apart.
"Oh, what birds they must have In
France," exclaimed Laplnlta,
"But it was not a real egg," said the
Jryad. "It was a make-believe egg and
It opened In the middle. It had two
hinges and shut with a click. Inside of
it oh l If you could have seen what was
inside of It! There was a beautiful doll
and all sorts of clothes for her to wear
even shoes, stockings and gloves, with
little sealskin sacque!"
The two rauuits sai siruiKin up uu
their haunches, their cottontails wig
gling in the grass and their noses bo
excited that they could scarcely speak.
"What a happy little girl that must
have been!" gasped Laplnlta.
"Of course we cannot get an egg like
that," said the Dryad, "but we must
find a nice, big one and put something
in It. Have you any goose eggs In this
"Oh, yes," eald Laplngro, "and I know
a goose who will give me one."
"Bun and get It, please," said the
Dryad, "and bring It here. Then we
hall see what can be done."
"But don't get one too big for me to
carry," said Laplnlta, anxiously.
When Laplngro came back under the
live oaks he brought a large and beauti
ful goose egg.
"That will do very well, Indeed," said
the Dryad. "Now we must cut It In half
o that we can take everything out of
it and make the shell open and ahut
We must have some gum to fasten on
the hinges, ana i win k" bci. muu
It oozes out of some trees so high up
that you can't reach it. While I am
gone you can cut the egg apart. Cut
it the long way, please, exactly In the
middle, and try to keep the edges
"The Dryad gilded away among the
treea and the two rabbits Bat and wlg-
Irled their noses in earnest cogitation.
I know how we can do It," presently
aid Laplngro. "I will gnaw off a leaf
f the saw palmetto and we can do It
with that" , ,.t-i-
Away hopped Laplngro, while Lapln
lta remained to watch the precious egg.
In ten minutes the goose egg was laid
In a little mossy hollow, where It could
rest steadily, and the two rabbits, each
with an end of the saw-edged palmetto
leaf In Kb mouth, had begun to cut the
egg down the middle. One of them sat
at one end of the egg and one at the
ether, and they pulled the leaf back
ward and forward as If It had been a
erou-cut saw worked by two people.
They had some trouble at first to
keep the saw exactly In the middle of
the egg, but as soon ns they had mndo
one good cut In the right place It was
easy enough to go on. Every time that
Laplnlta leaned forward her little cot-ton-tnll
wiggled to the west and ovety
time she pulled backward It wngged to
the east, bo that In a short time the
Ki'ound behind her was brushed entirely
At last the goose egg was cut exactly
In two hnlves, and when these fell
apart all the Inside ran out.
"It Is a great pity to waste a gosling,"
paid Laplngro, "but It can't be helped.
Come now Laplnlta! We must carry
these two halves of the egg to the
brook and wash them clean. I wonder
what the Dryad Is going to tell us to
put In them."
"Oh! I wonder very much," snld Lap
lnlta; "so very, very much,"
When the Drynd crtme back she found
the two halves of the egg nhell washed
nice nnil clean and already dry.
"How beautifully you have done It!"
she exclaimed. "I have brought some
nice soft gum for the hinges. Hut what
aro we to make them of? It ought to
be something like thin leather."
Laplngro clapped his rlKht forennw to
the side of his nose. "I think I can get
something that will do," snld he. "I
saw a tadpole this motnlng taking off
his skin bo as to get his legs out and
be a frog. He does not want the skin
any more, nnd 1 will go and see If I
can find It"
"We must have something to lino
the Inside of the egg," snld the Drynd.
"Do you know where you can get any
thing soft?"
"Oh, ycr" cried Laplnlta," I know
where there Is a little cotton patch. I
Win go nnd get some.
" 'A cotton patch?' Bald the Dryad,
'What Is thnt?'
"It Is where our talis grow. At least
I was told so when I was n little bit
of a baby. But I have already begun
not to believe It"
Very soon the little rabbit came hop
ping back to the Drynd with n bunch of
white cotton In her mouth, which mndo
her look as If she had two tails one In
front and one behind.
Presently Lnplngro returned with the
tadpole Bkln, which the Dryad declared
would do admirably for the hinges.
With a bit of sharp shell she cut It Into
proper shape and gummed It on the '
two halves of the egg Bhell, bo that
tney opened and closed nicely.
"I do not know how to make It shut
with a click," she said; "but when we
have Ulled It we can make a cord with
some of my hair and tie it up."
She then lined the egg with a thin
layer of soft cotton, and when this
was done she and the two rabbits set
themselves to consider what they
should put in the Easter egg. This was
not easy to decide, and having hidden
the egg under the moss they all went
wandering through the woods to see
what they could llnd.
They wandered nearly the rest of tho
day, and toward the close of the after
noon, as they were nearlng a path
which led through the woods, they were
startled by voices. Quickly hiding be
hind trees they saw two men who were
looking for something among the leaves
and grass on the ground.
"Well, It Isn't here now," said the
other, "and as you are such a lazy
fellow, Joseph, always lying down to
rest when you get a chance, I can't feel
sorry when you lose things out of
your pockets."
"But this is a great loss to me," Bald
the other. "With the tickets In that
package I expected to ride for a long
time. Now I shall have to walk, for I
can't afford to buy more."
"It will do you good to walk, Joseph,"
said the other, "and you ought to be
glad you lost your tickets. Come on, I
can wait no longer."
"What Is a ticket?" asked the Dryad,
when the men had gone."
"I don't know," Bald Laplngro, "but It
must be something to ride on. Look
at those two blrd3l What are they
On the ground, not far from the path,
two young birds, scarcely fledged, were
pulling at something which looked like
a black worm. Each held an end of It
In Its bill, and each tried with all Its
mlerht to net it awav from the other.
The black thing stretched and stretched
and, suddenly, it slipped from the bill
of one of the birds and snapped back
Into the face of the other one, so that
they both were frightened and ran
"These must be the tickets!" cried
Laplngro, picking up a small package.
"There are ever bo many of them, and
that black thing must have been 'round
them to hold them together."
"Yes," Bald the Dryad, "and In try
ing to pull It off they dropped the pack
age out of the path, so that the men
could not find It"
"And those are the tickets, are
they?" said Laplnlta. "But I don't Bee
how people ride on them."
"Nor do I," said the Dryad, "but
they do, for the man said bo. People
who are lazy or tired ride on them."
"I might take four of them," said
Laplnlta, "and put one foot on each,
but I don't believe they would ride me."
"No, Indeed," said Laplngro. "Wo
don't know how they are used."
"I'll tell you what will be a good
thing to do," said the Dryad. "Let's
put them In the Easter egg, and then
we can give it ic some chold; not to one
who la lazv. but to one who Is tired."
"I know a child who Is tired," cried
Laplnlta. "It is the okra girl. Every
morning she has to walk to the town
to carry okra for the people to make
gumbo. Sometimes she feeds me, and
I have heard her say that she was very
"The okra girl shall have the eggl"
cried the Dryad. "Now let us run and
fill It"
When the tickets had been neatly
packed Into the goose's egg, which fit
ted nicely over them, the Dryad drew
some long halrB from her hald and
twisted them into a pretty cord. With
this she tastefully tied up the egg so
that It could not come open. Then ev
erything waB ready.
Very early the next morning the
Dryad and the two rabbits went to
the cabin of the okra girl; Laplnlta
carrying the egg clasped close to her
breast as If It were a precious baby.
The girl slept soundly on a pallet on
the floor, nnd when Laplnlta had placed
the egg where she could see It as soon
as Bhe openeu ner eyes, .men mo
three companions stationed themselves
outside the open door, where they
could watch.
As soon as the sun was up the okra
girl awoke with a start, for she was
afraid she was late. Easter Sunday
was a great market morning In that
town, and she feared that someone elss
might supply her customers with okra.
When she sat up In bed and saw the
egg she clapped her hands. "An Eas
ter egg that the rabbits have brought
She saw that the egg was intended
to be opened, and when she untied the
cord of hair, lifted the upper half of
the shell and saw what the egg con
tained, there was never such a happy
girl as In this world. She took the
tickets out on her lap and gazed at
them with delight.
"Oh, now I can ride to town;" she
cried. "Every day for so many daysl
What a wonderful thing the rabbits
have brought to me."
"Now, then," whispered tho Dryad,
"we must watch her carefully and see
how Bhe rides on those tickets."
As soon ns the okrn girl was dressed
she picked up her basket, which sho
had filled the night before, and hurried
away toward the town.
"I don't call that riding." snld La
plnltn. "Let us wnlt nnd see what she docs
next," said Lnplngro, nnd the Drynd,
and the rabbits quietly followed tho
She soon enme to a wide rond, and
there she stopped. Hiding behind somo
bushes, tho three companions watched
her. Very soon nn electric enr camo
rumbling nlong the rails. Tho okra
girl held up her hand nnd tho car
stopped. She quickly seated herself and
the Drynd nnd the rnbblts plnllny paw
her tnke one of the tickets and give
It to the man, nfter which tho enr
rolled swiftly away and she was lost
to their sight.
They looked nt ench other In amazo
ment "So thnt Is the way thnt people
ride on tickets." Bald the Dryad. "I
never should have Imagined such a
thing If I hud not seen It."
"Yes, thnt Is tho wny It Is done," ex
plnlned Laplnlta. "And, oh, how I
should like to ride on a ticket"
Lnplngro laughed. "Wouldn't you
look funny,' said he, "sitting up on a
red velvet cushion holding out a tlcicet
to a man."
"I don't believe any rabbits ever took
a better Ennter egg to n deserving
child," Bald the Dryad. "But now I
must hurry bnck to the forest and
find an oak to live In."
"Come on! Come on!" cried Lnpln
gro, hopping briskly before her, "and
we will help you to find one."
"Yes," snld Lnplnltn, keeping closo
to the Drynd, "nnd It shall be one with
a crack In It, bo thnt you can gut out
whenever you want to bo with us."
Novor Has a Cold.
"I haven't had a cold all winter!"
This was the assertion with which
Mrs. Ella Wheeler Wilcox Introduced
her favorite topic the benefits accruing
from the use of pure cold water. "I
have not used hot wnter for bathing,"
she continued, "for more Minn a year,
and I have never felt better in my life.
Of course," she laughed at sight of
onmr nnn fl linrrlllpil filro. "I (If.
a Turkish bath every lllttlo while, but
that Is merely for Banltary purposes;
the cold water I regard as medicinal.
I take three minutes of Ice cold water
from the hose every morning."
"Ohl" shivered a wheezy little vic
tim of the Influenza, "I never could
stand thntl"
"Of course you couldn't at least not
at first, but If you begin gradually and
keep It up faithfully you will be taking
your three-minute showers in less than
two months, and by that time you will
be rid of that bad cold which you sim
ply encourage by the use of warm water
In bathing."
Mrs. Wilcox then went on to explain
how one should take this heroic treat
ment and nvold Injurious effects. "You
need a rubber hose, and If you can af
ford one with a spray nozzle so much
the better, but tho commonest rubber
tube will do. In using the bpray, turn
It first on the feet, nnd, as soon as they
become accustomed to It, raise tho
spray to the knees, and so on until tho
entire body Is soused. If there Is a
shower In your bath room observe tho
same order, putting the feet under the
Bpray first, then the knees, etc.
"When 1 began this treatment I was
troubled because I did not at first get a
reaction, and my friends insisted that I
was killing myself; but before long tho
reaction came and I have been grow
ing stronger ever since.
"I'm not the only one, either, who has
flourished under the cold water hose. I
know a lady 73 years old who Is able to
go to receptions and eat late suppers,
and she never could do It In the world
but for the strength which she got from
the use of cold water.
"Do you believe In using cold water
on the face?" asked a girl who was
more Interested In specialties for tho
complexion than In promoters of gen
eral health.
"No, not exactly," was the reply. "I'll
tell you what I have found to be the
best treatment for the face and neck It
Is very simple and absolutely harm
less. In the morning, before you go
out, tako about a third of a cup of
milk and fill it with boiling water. Then
with a soft flannel rag dipped In the
milk and water sponge the face for
about five minutes, after which rub on
some sort of pure cream and let It stay
until you are dressed. Then rub off as
much as will come off and your Bkln
will be as smooth as a baby's."
Mrs. Wilcox, as may be Judged from
these remarks, is a woman of ideas on
practical, every day matters, In addi
tion to having opinions upon Buch deep
subjects as the destiny of the bouI, the
object of living, the education and
training of sins ana Kinureu topics
with which she occupies her mind and
her pen.
m .
Frills of Fashion.
Silk shirt walsta are completed with
a stock and long tie of the same silk.
Neckties of white chiffon trimmed
across the ends with gathered narrow
white satin ribbon are the latest fad.
Chlffonne etraw hats are already
worn with new spring costumes.
Spangles are certainly the rage now
adays. There are spangled net gowns,
bodices, waists, hats, bonnets, fans,
and now comes a spangled parasol.
Bordered fabrics, by the yard or Im
ported In robe patterns, are greatly in
evidence among both spring and sum
mer dress materials.
The newest hats have their crowns
entirely made of flowers and leaves,
and these are all shaped with straight
brims, to be worn well forward over
the ears, turned up at the back, trim
med with rosettes or a large bow of
The uses of black velvet ribbon trim
ming are still manifold, from the mere
line of black bebe ribbon to the very
widest that Is manufactured. Loops,
rosettes and Insertions are made of
this ribbon, and graduated rows are
liHPd on both skirt and bodice, some-
times, alone, or in conjunction with
pinked Bilk ruches, narrow frills, or
wider flounces.
Tne big dotted veil Is a thing of the
I past It is not even carried In stock In
the rcauy sweu piuces. xnu cumpicAiuu
veil has ousted It This is very prop
erly nnmed, but It might be even bet
ter cnlled the complexion beautlfler. It
Is astonishing how a piece of plain
black net of crisscross or diamond de
sign can enhance a plain woman's
A novelty In dress tlmmlngs Is a fine
fawn-colored batlBte embroidered all
over In a minute design of chenille.
This Is used for cuffs, collars and re
vers on silk waists. Oriental embrol
deied Insertions set in between groups
of tucks form nn other mode of trim
ming. Waists of plain silk In medium
and light colors nre striped up and
down and diagonally across the sleeves
with velvet ribbon of a darker shade.
While trying to hang up a washtub
at the head of a flight of stairs, a
Montreal woman was knocked down
stairs by the tub, which slipped from
the rail, and her neck was broken.
Tim ItrquUltlnna by the Government for
It tor Nuvj Viag.
Imperative requisitions by tho Gov
ernment authorities for tho production
of bunting for nnvy flags nro what In
Bttro tho superiority so well known to
characterize tho Amerlcnn nrtlcle. Tho
regulations prcscrlbo thnt tho fabric
be made entirely of wool ot tho host
quality, nnd show no Imperfections,
tho weight to be flvo nnd one-fourth
pounds nvorltlupols por pleco of forty
yards of 10-lnch width, tho ynrn to ho
ovonly spun, tho wnrp nnd filling to
contain no less than thirty-four
threads to tho Inch, and tho warp two
ply with ono-ply filling, properly
twisted; further, a tensile strength Is
required of slxty-flvo pounds for tho
warp and forty-five pounds for tho fill
ing, In test pieces two Inches wide. Tho
colors must bo as "fnBt" as It Is pos
sible to mnko them, nnd not liable to bo
seriously nrfected by being Bonked con
tinuously for twenty-four hours In
frosh water and then thoroughly wash
ed In wnter with which Is combined a
good grade of laundry soap. Every
stripe nnd device on the lings mado of
this superb nmterlnl nro measured with
tho most perfect geometrical accuracy,
nnd tho stnrs nre put on so carefully
nnd evenly thnt when tho ling Is hold
up to the light the stars, which aro
tnnde of muslin and put on both sides,
appear to bo a part of tho fabric. Tho
stnrs nre cut with chisels out of blench
ed muslin laid thirty thlckncsscsa to
gether on a large open block. Boston
After llurvmt All tlm Fields Uerom
Common Friiperly.
Tho French peasant has nn Inde
pendent means of existence. He owns
the soil ho tills. If ho employs laboi
ers they, nt least, will own a liotiso and
garden, and hope to own a plot. The
English villager Is cither a Bmnll
tradesman or a laborer. A garden
which he cultivates hut does not own
Is, as a rule, the extent of his posses
sions. There aro two classes In an
English vlllngc, and theso may be sub
divided Into various religious sects.
There Is only one class In oir French
commune a fact which lies a material
bearing upon tho social economy ot
the community. Every Inhabitant of
tho commune Is a proprietor of some
thing, and all are bent on saving, yet,
with all their Individualism, they com
bine for common and mutual Interest
This Is lllustrnted by the organization
of tho syndicate for buying at whole
sale prices. They unite for the cul
tivation of the soil, lending each other
horses and making up teams. Every
commune has a field, which Is common
property, and where, on payment of n
trining fee, animals graze. After tho
harvest all the fields become common
property, and the gros betall and tho
other betall are allowed to roam at
large. Contemporary Review.
Haifa Million Gnlton of Winn Tumped
Into It by Stouiii In Culltornln.
Half a million gallons of wine, all In
one still, deep, red lake, are the feat
ure of this year's wine Industry In
California. The lake is the biggest vat
In all the history of wine making. Tho
famous great tun at Heidelberg held
only 50,000 gallons. London boasted
tanks twice as large as Heidelberg, and
in San Francisco la one which holds
150,000 gallons. Before this huge un
derground cavern at Aatl, In Sonoma,
where 500,000 gallons of grnpe Juico
are to tako on sweetness and flavor, all
former feats In storing vast quantities
of wine are Insignificant.
For one solid week two steam pumps
forced Into this reservoir four-Inch
streams of grape juice before It waa
filled and corked. For this huge
storage tank is in reality a sort of
Drobdignagian bottle, burled well un
derground to preserve It from changes
of temperature and tho heat of the
sun's rays. Its construction was a mat
ter of sudden necessity. It unexpect
edly became known that there was
more grape Juice in Sonoma vineyards
than there was room in which to put it.
The idea of a big concrete cistern was
broached and quickly adopted, and in
forty-five days from the tlmo the first
shovelful of earth was thrown out tho
steam pumps began their task of filling
it New York Sun.
A Cliunge.
"What's the matter wid Brlggers?"
usked the gentleman with the red shirt.
"I thought he was always so radical
In his beliefs and wanted the money of
tho country divided up evenly. Now
he doesn't say a word." "Because," re
marked the man with the whiskers,
"hla undo has Just left him $10,000."
Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
HhiI No Vacancy.
Mr. Dunham "I have called, sir, to
tell you that your daughter, Miss Fan
nlo, and 1 love each other very dearly.
I wan to ask you for her."
Old Mlllyuns "Well, you'll havo to
wait awhile. There's no vacancy in
tho store now that I could put you in
to." Cleveland Loader.
' An Kuy Tett.
Timmins I havo never been able to
make up my mind whether I am gen
ius or not.
Simmons It is easily tested. Just
act like a hog when you are in society,
and if you are a genius people will nd
admlre you for it. Indianapolis Jour
nal. A Devotee.
Frank Some aenius in Birmingham
has invented a buttonleis shirt
Billy Why, that's old. I'vo worn
thorn ever since my wife learned to
rMe a bicycle. Boston Traveller,
1'inliljr Didn't Wnlt lor Ceremony or
Among tho Turks employed on tho
lino of tho first Turkish rnllwny was
an old ninn who hnd a son who was a
soldtor In otio of tho regiments In tho
gnrrlson nt Hustchuk, whom ho hnd
not Roon for a good mnny months.
Each tiny tho regular through train
nrrlved nnd loft, but tho old Turk nov
or got tho clinnco to run up to Hust
chuk to boo his son, for tho trntn JtiHt
enmo nnd went at tho very moment
when ho wna cngiKcd at his mltldny
"Why don't you gel Icavo, nnd go to
sco him?" said tho practlcnl Irish
man. How can 17" replied tho old mnn.
"Doesn't tho train conio in and go
nwtxy while I nm nt prnyors? Allah
wills It thnt I Bhould not sco him."
And so tho tlmo continued to pass,
tho old man tolling Flynn how his
heart was weary to soo his Bon. It
happened one dny thnt, as tho trnln
drew up nt tho stntlon, tho old mint
wna engaged nt his dovotlonB on hi
prnyor enrpot closo to tho line, at.
empty truck with tho door run bnc'w
hnd stopped Jtmt opposlto whoro h
wna on his knees nnd IiIb forehead to
tho ground, nnd tho Irlahmnn camo
nlong. Seized by a sudden Inspira
tion, ho caught up tho old Turk, prayer
carpet nnd all, and landed him In tho
truck Just ub tho trnln moved off. Two
days nftor the old mnn enmo back by
tho down trnln, hla faco benmlng with
"Ah, my friend," ho said, na ho saw
Flynn standing on tho platform, "on
ly for you 1 should never have aeon my
aon. It must havo been Allah who
"put It Into your henrt to throw mo
Into tho train. May ho roward you fo
It." Harper's Round Taulo.
TIioho Who Attutnl tlm Cznrlnn Mint ba
Able to Hew mill Cook.
Those who think thnt tho llfo of a
lndy nbont a court is necessarily that
of a butterfly, may bo aurprlacd to
learn that clevornesa with the ncedlo
la nn adjunct demanded of tho mnlda
of honor nt tho court of Russia, to bo
of uao In cascB of cmorgoncy when in
nttendnnco on the cznrlnn. That thoy
have nlso to read well nloud nnd to
Btand for any longth of tlmo goca with
out Baying, but It would hardly bo Be
lieved that in order to pnBB Into tho
imperial presenco Russian mnlda of
honor havo to obtain a diploma for
cooking! Such la, however, tho caao.
In Borne imperial menages, too, tho
maid of honor haB to composo the ev
eryday dinner menu. And in all this
training thoro underlies tho teaching
that an empresa or grand duchess of
Russia Ib a personago of divine voca
tion. Having passed through all this
ordeal, tho would-be maid of honor, nt
tho ago of 1G or 17, is presented to
the empress, and if finding favor in
the Imperial eyes, ia appointed a de
moiselle d'honnettr pnBslngBubsequent
ly through the varlottB grades mon
tloncd. From this body of maldona,
too, the various grand duchessca, with
tho czarlna'H approval, also make their
80lections, Chicago Times-Herald.
Mlstrcaa Oh, Bridget! Bridget!
what nn awful numbskull you are.
You'vo put tho potntoea on tho tablo
with tho skins on right in front of
our vialtors, too! You you what
shall I call you?
Bridget (affably) Call mo "Agnes,"
if ye lolko, mum; 'tis me other name.
New York World.
Mrs. Pakenham (of Chicago) S
you passed right through London and
never Btopped to see the Queen?
Mrs. Beaconstreet (of Boston) Yes.
Mrs. Porkonham--Goodncs8 gracious!
I should as soon think of passing
through Dakota and not stopping for a
divorce. Judge.
Fuddy What has it to do with th
caBO that tho new doctor has lots o
Duddy Everything, my dear hoy.
Tho man who is well heeled ought to
be ablo to stamp out diseaso if anybody
can do it Boston Transcript.
Neighbor "Does your father rent
that house you live in?"
Boy "No, indeed. It's his own
house, every bit of it. It's been
bought and paid for and insured and
mortgaged and everything."
New Clerk "Havo you ever read
'Tho Last Days of Pompeii'?"
Mrs. Neurlch "No; what did ho dl
New Clerk Somo kind of an erup
tion, I believe." Chicago News.
A Gorman thus discoursed learned
ly upon tho business situation recent
ly: "If business is no hotter next wee'
dan It waa yesterday two weeks atr
den I'm a son of a gun, dat's vat
hopos." Philadelphia North Amorlcan.
Tho Sentimental She Oh! tho over
rentlesa ocean! How It fills mo with
sad, vngue longings!
The Practical Ho You're mighty
lucky. It empties mo of everything.
New York Herald.
"I see the critics, nlmost to a mnn,
are praising Ponsmlth's latost book."
"Then they must rogard him as being
too weak to bo in any dangor of geU
ting to tho top by their holp." Cleve
land Leader.
"So you refused him?"
"Yes; I told him it was better to
make a great many men happy by
being engaged to them than to make
nnn tnlosrntita liv mnrrvlnir him."
London Fun Almanac.
Forgetting One' Name nnd Ilemember
lug Another I'emnti'ii llnnktrartl.
Joo Jofforatm novor forgets his lines
but has nn Imperfect recollection ot
nnmos, oven forgetting his own some
times. Ono day ho called at a post
olllco In n small place and naked tho
"Any mall for mo?" ,
"What name?"
"Nnmo? Good gracious! I don't
know. Lot mo think. Why, I am to
piny 'Rip Vnn Wlnklo' to-night nt
your hall."
"Joo Jefferson?" suggested tho cterk.
"Ycb. Jofferson; certainly; thanks;"
nnd, receiving his mall, tho actor went
awny hnppy.
A favorlto trick of a capricious mo
mory is to substitute somo other nnmo
for tho ono wnntcd, a process duo to
naalinllntlon. A couple of ladles on a
Chicago street enr naked tho con
ductor to leave them at Pennsylvania
"There's no such nvcnuo In this
suburb," said tho conductor.
"But thero cortnlnly is," reiterated
tho ladies; Wo havo frlonda living
there, nnd ought to know."
"I'orhnps you menn Keystone ave
nue," suggested a passenger, nnd they
Bald thnt wna Juat what they did mean,
but thoy know It had something to do
with Pennsylvania, which wns Im
pressed upon their memories as tho
Keystono Stnto.
A good story is told of nn cxcollont
woman who hnd this fatal faculty for
misconstruing unities. Her daughter
was expecting a cnll from a gentloman,
nnd Bhe impressed upon her mother
tho fnct that his name wns n very
simple ono and easy to remember
Cowdry. Tho mother repented it un
til alio waa suro alio could not pos
8lbly forget It, and on the evening
when ho called hurried forward 4o
meet him, Baying, graclouBly:
"How nro you, Mr. Dry cow 7" Chi
cago TImcs-IIcraltl.
Their Niuiion do not Inillntitn Tlielr Spec
ial Object.
The Provldenco Telegram says that
many agricultural colleges, espcclallr
In New-England, show a disposition
to conccnl their special function us
schools of ngrlcitlturc. "Tho collcgo
in Maine," It dcclnres, "has hnd its
nnmo changed to 'tho University of
Mnlne,' omitting any allusion to farm
ing, and will add a school for tho
production of lawyers to Us equip
ment Tho Stato continues to bo
taxed for its support. Tho professors
of tho Massachusetts Agricultural Col
lego aro ashamed of tho name, and
want it called tho Massachusetts Col
lego. Professors in our Rhode Island
College of Agriculture and tho Mo
chnnlc Arts havo not waited for legis
lation, but quietly talk about tho
Rhodo Island College, a tltlo which
would belong to Brown if it was to ho
assigned to any institution. How
can theso men ho expected to accom
plish much for tho elevation of farm
ing and tho farmer when they sail
under false colors nnd do not like to
havo it known that thoy are connected
with an institution whero farmlug is
Her Appeal Not In Vain.
Not long ago President Diaz of
Mexico received a letter from a little
girl of Pueblo, in which Bho said:
"Mamma locked up my doll, and I
wasn't naughty. Pleaso make her lot
mo have It again." A day or two
later the child got by post from tho
genial President a handsome doll,
with a note stating his belief, Bhould
sho remain good, her mother would
never have occasion to lock it away.
By that time tho girl's parents had
got wind of tho message to Diaz, and
they wroto to him expressing regret
that their wilful child had taken it
Into her head to communicate with
him. A note was received in reply
from tho President's secretary assur
ing tho worthy "ople that his exalted
superior had quite enjoyed the experi
ence, and was pleased to havo tho
worry of holding ofllco relieved oc
casionally by such a quaint episode.
New York Tribune.
A Great SiirirUe.
A Michigan paper tolls a story of a
littlo girl named Hattle, whoso mother
was putting her to sleep one night. At
last her mother said:
"Hattle, dear, I am anxious that you
get qulot and go to sleep, because I
want to go downstairs and Join in the
evening prayers."
"Who's doin' to pway?" asked Hat
tle. "Why, Uncle William, of course,
"Uncle William pway?" said tho
baby, with wide-eyed astonishment,
and springing up in bed in tho vigor
of her surprise. "W'y I fawt he waa
a Demokwat?"
Tlio Iteuson of it Name.
"Lemmo see," asked the boarder who
is always wanting to know things of
no use, "what Is It they call those red,
green and bluo lights that a skyrocket
throws off?"
"Verifiers," said tho Cheerful Idiot
"Really?" asked the inqulsltlva
"Yes. They givo color to tho re
port." Indianapolis Journal.
An Aditsjo KnvckHtl lluf
"Love is blind," murmured Mr.
Moekton regretfully.
"That's nonsense," replied his wife.
"When a girl falls In lovo with a man
sho sees magnificent qualities in him
which none of hor family can niaka out
aud which become wholly obscure oven,
to her in tho course of a year or so."
Washington. Star.
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