Hemingford herald. (Hemingford, Box Butte County, Neb.) 1895-190?, October 02, 1896, Image 7
is ifri It y 1 I1' t V1. Lady rjrnrj Somerset's Ilaiband. Mr. Somcrs Somerset, the uew as sistant secretary to tho royal commis slon on the licensing laws, Is tho Bon not only of tho well known Lady Hen ry Somerset, but also of Lord Henrv Somerset, who is still very much allvo nuaougn pcopie are apt 10 iorgci vne fact. Owing to certain scandals of an unseemly typo in which Lord Henry was implicated, his wlfo separated from him, and he found it convenient to live abroad chiefly in Italy. Ho tmay often be teen at tho La Scala jopcra house at Milan. Thoso newspa pers which refer to Mr. Somerset as ,the actual heir to tho dukedom of Ilcau fort, forget that after Lord Worcester and nny children that ho may hove, comes Lord Henry Somerset, and there fore the son's elnim is very remote st. James Unzetto. The Value of Literary History. Literary history belongs to the do main of fact just as much ns geography does, aud the ability on tho part of a child to reel off the names of authors and their dates is just as useless as his ability to toll tho capital of Bolivia or to draw u map of Afghanistan. A cer tain amount of literary history is use ful, tho amount ger in Mr. Stop ford Brooke's and Prof. Biuhardsonra primers and in Mr. Brander Mathers' volumo on American literature, but not a bit more, for as intellectual training literary history is not so cOl ctent as another study. September Atlantic, fi The Western Man'a Ideal. The United States is unique in tue extent to which tho individual has been given an open field, uncheckod by restraints of on old social order, or of scientific administration of govern ment. Tho Bolf-mado man was the Western man's ideal, was tho kind of man that all men might become. Out of his wilderness experience, out of tho freedom of his opportunities, ho fash ioned a formula of social regeneration, the freedom of tho indvidual to seek his own. Ho did not consider that his conditions were exceptional and tem porary. September Atlantic Untr to Me ml n Silk Waist. A dressmaker lays down threo rules for mending a silk waistt Use ravel ings when you can. Sew from the un der side. Do not turn over edges, but darn flat aud trust to careful pressing. If a bone begins to show through, do not mend but cut off the bono an inch. If the silk wears off around tho hooka aud eyes, move them along ever so lit tle. Make a virtue of worn out seams by applying black feather stitching; and remember that a silk waist is good as long as tho upper part of tho sleeve remains. Plastron, choker, lace, cuffs and careful mending make a new waist for you. Admitted I'rror Ton Soon. It is very hard to go about with a bullet and an ache in your head. Still harder is i. when your doctor disbe lieves tho headache and bullet and shuts you up as a lunatic. This hap pened to a young Hamburg confec tioner, and for some years he lived in a lunatic asylum. Finally ho signed a paper that the headache was a fancy and tho bullet a mero idea, and that ho had got them both out of his head. .And now have come the remorseless X .rays, which have disclosed tho bullet in the man's skull. Ought he to be glad or sorry? London World. II the llaby tn Cutting: Teetn. (team and ue that oM ami well-tried remedy, Has, nrixMAw'a Boothuo Srurr for Children Teething A Novel Pnenmatlo Tube. Pneumatic tubes have many uses, but one of tho latest is attracting a great deal of attention from its novel ty. This Is the tube for stacking hay. It is built in sections, and is controlled by metal htraps, pivot3 and arms. The hay is druwn into tho tube, carried through it with great velocoty, and by a turntable and swinging arrangement liko a crane is evenly distributed on the stack. Ne eough so bad that Dr. Kay's Lung Balm will not cure it. See ad. A story of the time of Shakespeare, written by John Bennett, will be the leading serial for the new volume of St Niuholas. It Is called "Master Skylark," aud will deal witli the romantic events of tho Elizabethan age-. The great dramatist figures as one af the leading characters, although the hero and heroine aro a boy and a girl. Another serial, "The La Three Soldiers," by William H. Shel ton, lias n novel plot It tolls of threo I'd ion soldiers who became veritable castaway in the Confederacy. Both stories will begin in the November St Nicholas. MMfMMMMtM Blooming Health secured to every woman by the use of &mfom s ' Thousands of afflicted women have been cured by Its use. W' y not You ? A Purely Vegetabje Preparation. A Remedy with a Remarkable Record. ' . Largo brittle, or new style smaller ',', '. onout jour tlrULK'IJi- Write for Meitl- cal JlinnW free. Warner's Solo Caro ' ; Co., llihetei,N. Y. ! Ur, Kay's Re- ovator, r$Al' sotiKtlpatum llv rnd Idooy diseases Alarm; IwUiUwi. i. ioua nr meaarapica una dgo L Dr. tl. J Kay Mnaical Co., OmaUa. Neb t SSRVANTS AT HOME. WHEN IN CHAROE OF THE HOUSE HAVE A QOOD TIME. Olijerttnnnltle Ilelinrlor nnd NoUo file ainn Who Lives Next Door la Unable to (let Anjr Ileal Tlielr Aminul Three Months' I'lcule. HATS tho matter, old man? You look tired." Tho greeting on Monday morning had tho pocullar intonation that in dicates a suspicion of a prolonged search for relaxa tion on Sunday and its subsequent ef fect on the norvous system, Bays tho New York Timeo. "Look tired! I am tired, and I'm cross and ugly. Do I look as if I had boon attacked by nervous dyBpopsia, almost exhausted by St Vitus' dance and then left on tho rack for hours?" "Well, not quito that, old man." "Then I'm in luck. Tho fact of the matter is that I was out of tho house only tihreo hours yesterday and then I went to Harlom and back in tho cable cars. They were the only restful hours I had between early in tho morning and midnight Why? Bccauso I was the victim of the confidence of two of my neighbors who havo closed their premises and gono to tho country and have loft servants in charge. Do you catch on? Well, some of your funny friends on tho press don't come anywhere near the actual facts when they bring out every year tho pen-worn descriptions of the antics of servants during tho absonco of families. If my neighbors' servants would dress up in tho fineries of their mistresses, and occupy tho parlors. I wouldn't mind, because tho damago would be to tho feelings of thoso who should bo concerned, but when they in vite their sisters, cousins, aunts and nearer relatives to Jamborees in tho rear yard or basement and disturb my peace of mind I'm ready to kick. "Tho rear of my house is about thir ty feet from tho side of a largo apart ment houso that has tonants that are a3 quiet as they can be, usually. My fa vorite room is in tho rear, because it is cool and shady thero. My suffcring3 began In the morning whllo reading tho papers and I thought they wouldn't last long, but I didn't know tho mean ing of servants' invitations. Tho quiot old gentleman who clcGcd tho apart ments in tho second story and went with his wlfo and daughter about a month ago, leaving a servant in charge, would havo been surprised if ho had re turned unexpectedly yesterday. I Judg ed from the conversation that tho sorv ant had invited her brothor and sister and two cousins to spend tho day with her In very nicely furnished rooms, be cause thoy took possession of tho par lor and proceeded to mako thomsolvos comfortable. The young men were In their shirtsleeves, and they apprecito ed tho restful qualities of tho lounges by drawing them to tho windows and gathoring all of tho sofa pillows thoy could find and stretching out at full length on them. Between snatches of all tho now tunes of tho variety halls were remarks on tho eccentricities of tho tenants. One found a French text book and tried to instruct tho others in tho pro nunciation of French. Another who thought he had tho voice of on elocu tionist recited from ono of tho class ics that the old gentleman prized. Magazines and illustrated periodicals amused them for awhile. Tho mlxturo of slang and good literature was not very edifying. After lunch they turn ed to gossip and the details of picnics on previous occasions. The laughter and loud talking Jarred one's nerves, and I think I would bo willing to pay a month's rent for tho old gentleman if he had returned and found tho party In possession. I couldn't read and I could hardly wrie a letter and my wife couldn't get hor usual afternoon doze. Late in tho afternoon the visitors went away and I thought we would havo a quiet evening, but that's where I made a mistake. "My wlfo remained at home, but I went out for a breath of air. When I returned I hoard the most exasperating noises from the basement and yard of tho houso adjoining. Tho servants In chargo there had invited their friends or relatives to spend the evening, and the way they carried on was disgrace ful. Tho fact that tho front of the hoiiBO was dark with drawn curtains waB no indication that liveliness should not ho expected behind the gloom. Tho contrast of tho quietness In June, be fore tho family departed, with the noisiness in July was remarkable and suggestive. The speeches, congs and remarks could not havo been louder if tho company had occupied an east side tenement. Tho disturbance lasted until midnight Porhaps you don't wonder now that I look tired." Tho experience may ho suggestive to house-owners and tenants who do not realize that they may leave behind op portunities for disagreeable and objec Uonablo behavior. It may bo said that servants should be allowed to havo some fun, but It is doubtful whether their masters and mistresses would knowingly permit them to havo that fun elsewhere than tho neighborhoods they are willing to seek at other times. Tho reflection on tho bohavior of wme servants should not be applied to all. Tho servants that havo respect for the families they servo aro quiet and orderly nnd thoy are ao observant of tho requirements of a respectable local ity as any ono could desiro. Thoy aid In the solution of tho servant question. Tho outbreaks of others make tho solu tion more difficult. THEIR BONES OO HOME. Lively Trade Id the Shipment of Unas' Chinamen. Tho bones of overy Chinaman whe dies in this country nro sent back tc tho celestial ompiro for lntermout, sayt the Now York World. They tiro shipped in largo boxes from San Francisco un der tho designation of "fleh-bono" nl tho rato of $20 a ton. This flBh-bone ' fiction Is in order to evado tho rule of tho steamship companies, which chnrgo full passenger rates for the transportation of dead bodies. Nearly overy Chinaman who comes hero Is ! under tho caro of tho Six Companies. J They sign a contract guaranteeing to return tho bones of tho dead for burial with thoso of their ancestors. On overy steamer leaving San Francisco thoro nro invalid Chinese steerage passengers who hopo to live until they reach tholr native country. An agree ment exists between tho Six Compa nies nnd tho steamship managers which forbids tho burial of these Chinamen should thoy dio at sen and Uio Six Companies furnish coffins of tho pecu liar Chinese pattern for use in such emergencies. When a Chinaman dice at sea his body is embalmed, placod in a Bealed coffin and lowered into tlio hold. Tho expenso is paid by the other Chinese posscngerB and stownrds of tho ship, all of whom belong to Hint race. When tho ship roaches Hong Kong tho cofTinB nro delivered to the Tung Wah hospital, which gives them to tho surviving friends in China. Every Chinaman among us Is supposed to bo registered at tho Tung Wah hos pital and with tho Six Companies at San Francisco. I.nnchlnsr on Kjrir I'hotphute. "On tho broiling days," says a busy woman, "food is very distasteful. I find myself ignoring luncheon hour, nnd then In tho middle of tho afternoon am exhausted in consequence. Ono nceda nourishing food through such strain of weather, but not heating food. If 1 cannot eat at noon I at least go out and get an egg phosphate. Thero la both nourishment nnd a Httlo stimulant In this drink. I take care to go to a place whero I can seo tho fresh ;gg broken into tho glass, which I find more appetizing nnd nourishing than the extract used at somo ocda fountain counters. About G o'clock I get a sec ond ono, and in this way I get through a broiling day with comfort Two raw eggs, I find, aro sufficient nourishment from breakfast to dinner, both ot which meals I force myself, If the incli nation is lacking, to partake of. Phy sicians say that systems weakened by fasting succumb easily to tho effects of heat, but, on tho other hand, hot meals in tho middle of the day for one who must go on working through the heat of tho afternoon aro not to bo rec ommended. It seems to me tho egg phosphate diet solves the problem." Progressive llaminon't 1'artlrs. A progressive hammock party Is something now. At one recently given in a smaller Wisconsin city each guest upon arrival was presented with a tiny half square of cardboard on which was written one-half of some chosen sub ject. Partners were found by mntch ing theso cards, the man having tho lat ter half of the subject being privileged to sit for flvo minutes with tho girl who hold tho first part ot the subject. The lawn presented a very pretty pic ture, hung as it was with Chinese lan terns and hammocks and having rugs spread over tho grass. Over each ham mock hung a card-board each bearing a line. Tho couple whoBO card bore the same inscription as that abovo the hammock occuplod that particular one. Among tho subjects were: An Ideal Boy, An Ideal Girl, Lovo Spoons and Chaperons. Each man conversed for flvo minutes upon one subject, and thou progressed to the next hammock where conversation upon another topic was renewed. After each hammock had been visited tho girls voted as to which man had ontcrtained them in the bos manner, and ho won the prize. PECULIAR PHRASES. A coroner's Jury in Maine reported that "Deceased came to his death by excessive drinking, producing apoplexy in the minds of tho Jury." An old French lawyer, writing of an estate ho had Just bought, ndded: "Thero Is a chapel upon it in which my wife and I wi3h to bo burled, if God spares our lives." On a tombstone in Indiana is tho following inscription: "This monu ment was erected to tho memory of John Jinkins, accidentally shot as n mark of affection by his brother." A Michigan editor received somo verses not long ago with tho following note of explanation: "These lines wore written fifty years ago by ono who has, for a long time, slept In his grave mere iy for pastimo." A certain politician, lately condemn ing tho government for its policy con cerning tho Income tax, is reported to havo said: "They'll keep cutting the wool off the sheep that lays the golden eggs until they pump It dry." A merchant who died suddenly left in his bureau a letter to one of his cor respondents which he had not scaled. Ilia clerk, seeing it necessary to send tho letter, wroto at the bottom, "Since writing tho abovo I havo died." An orator at one of the university unions boro off the palm when he de clared that "Iho British Hon, whether It Is roaming tho deserts of India or climbing tho forests of Canada, will not draw in its horns nor retire into its shell." "A reporter in describing tho mur der of a man namod Jorkln said: "Tho murderad was evidently in quest of money, but. luckily, Mr. Jorkln had deposited all his funds in tho bank the day bofore, so that he lost nothing but his life." Oonrlolenre. A Detroit man recently bought him self one of tho suits of tow that hnve pained a great deal of popularity for Mimmer wear. Tho colored man who docs odd chores around his homo looked ut it, turned away aud heaved a tre mendous sigh. "What's tho matter.Augustus? Don't you approve of this outfit?" " "luint for me tor 'sprem no 'pinion. But I wantH ter say dat of wus comes ter do wus, I's rcdy tcr stick by do lnm'ly eben if I has ter tnko Icbs wages." "You seem to think this suit is con nectud with hard times." "Ynsslr. But I didn't 'maglno dey wue ez hahd ez all dls. Hit doan mole so much dlffcr'nco tor cullud folks W'en I wah llvln' down souf 1'so raised ,hul inm'llcs ob pikcrnlnnles dntud tal cr coffee sack an' cut hoi's fob dcro inrros an' malt' It pass fer co't vest an' ibrecches. But much ez I'vo hyutd rbout disc huhd times, I nobbcr didn spek tcr 6eo cr sho nufT whito gon'le man havo ter go 'roun in jute do's." Detroit Frco Press. Iowa farms for salo on crop pay ments. 10 per cent cash, bnlnnco ,H, crop yearly until paid for. J. MUL II ALL, Woukcgan, 111 Ilia Month Mmlo Trouble. A fow yenrs ago two men wcro con victed of horso stealing in a district court In Montana. They deserved a sentence of ten years imprisonment, but tho judge let them off with three. Tho worse man of tho two, supposing that tho scntonco onco pronounced was past revision, addressed tho court "I just wont to Bay," lie told tho judge, "that when I get out you will bo the first ono I will como hero to kllL" "Oh, well," said tho judge, "In that caso I'll mako it ten years. Then you won't trouble mo so soon." Having said this ho turned to tho other mnn aud said: "Is there anything you would liko to say?" "Not a blessed word, "answered tho prisoner. Tho man who said noth ing is now out While his partner is still behind tho bars. For lung and chest diseases, Piso's Curo is the boat nicdliino io bavo uned. Airs. J. L. Nortbrott, Windsor, Ont., Canada. Ittuiieinbnrluir Names, There is a Boston society woman who cannot remember names, neither can her daughter. Ono day they met a Mrs. Howe, and afterward tho daugh ter remarked: "llowo invented the sewing machine didn't ho? Well, just think of machines and wo will bo sure to got her name." Tho two Indies went to ten a few days afterward, and Mrs, llowo wns there. Up sailed tho moth er with her sweetest smile and ex claimed: "My dear Mrs. Singer, how delighted I am to sec you again!" Soon afterward tho daughter appeared, and, witli equal charm of manner, said: "My dear Mrs. Wilcox, how aro you?" FIT8 MoppM frri) and prrmtncntlv cured. No nta iifi.r Ur.t iluy-iiuf Dr. Kllnr'xdrratKerTO Uealnrer. Kri-o aitrml boltiiiuid trratln. Bead to Ob. Kuh, 031 Arcli8U, Philadelphia, I'a. Einrrsou'a l'rnyer. In tho August issue of the Arena the editor contributes the following signifi cant anccdoto concerning Wliitticr and Emerson: The two were taking a drlvo together when they passed a small, unpaintcd house by the road side. "There," said Emerson, polnt Tng out the house, "lives an old Cnl van 1st, and she prays for mo every day. I am glu'd she does. I pray for myself." "Does she?" said Whittlor. "What does thee pray for, friend Emerson." "Well, when I first open ray eyos on tho beautiful world, I thank God that lam alive and live so near Boston." What you need is something to curo you. Get Dr. Kay'a Ken ovator. See ad. In the number of Harper's Bazar Is sued on October 3d thero will bo given the first chapter of "KranccsWnldcaux," a brilliant serial story from tho pen of Rebecca Harding Davis. Tho story is original in treatment, and has for its motif tho absorbing lovo of a mother for her only son. It will occupy eight consecutive numbers of the Bazar and ,bo finely illustrated. "Autumn Fash 'ionB (or Men" will be fully treated in the next issue of the Bazar. Diplomacy. Mrs. Hendricks (proudly walking oat of tho sewing room) "Well, Percy, how do you like my bloomers?" Mr. Hendricks "Oh, they do very well, but dear me, how much older than usual they make you look." On the following day a neat package intended for the far away heathen, was forwarded from tho Hendricks home. Cleveland leader. Gladness Comes With a better understanding of tho transient nature of the many phys ical Ills, which vanish before proper ef forts gentlo efforts pleasant efforts rightly directed. There is comfort in tho knowledge, that so many forms of sickness are not duo to any actual dis ease, but simply to n constipated condi tion of the system, which the pleasant family laxative. Syrup of Figs, prompt ly removes. That is why it is the only remedy with millionsof families, and is everywhere esteemed so highly by all who valuo good health. Its beneficial effects aro duo to tho fact, that it is the ono remedy which promotes internal cleanliness without debilitating the organs on which it acts. It is therefore all important, in order to get its bene ficial effect:, to note when you pur chase, that you havo tho genuino arti cle, which is manufactured by tho Cali fornia Fig Syrup Co. only and bold by all reputable druggists. If in the enjoymeut of good health, and tho system is regular, laxatives or other remedies are then not needed. Ii afflicted with uny nctunl disease, one may bo commended to tho most skillful physicians, but if in need of a laxativv ono should havo tho best, and with the well-informed ovcrywhorc, Syrup a' Figs stands highest and is most lurgel. ' Used and gives most general satisfaction nlr nnnm In Cnbbngn Leave. "Tho hot spell has beon good for mo In ono way," said an uptown produce dealer. "You know thoro is a popular uoltof in tho country that cabbngo leaves will protect one from sunstroke. Thnt belief has been communicated to the city, and tho idea litis cropped out wonderfully in tho past fow days. You know it's only tho green leaves that are supposed to be protectors, nnd tho only thing for a person to do who wnnts ono of them in a hnrry to put under his hat is is to buy a wnolo head of cabbage. Truckmen and street cleaners nro my best customem this work. Yesterday afternoon a half doz en of tho latter enma iu hero, bought four heads of cabbage, divided tho green leaves, nnd, with helmets stuffed with them, wont confidently back to their broiling work." Now York Times. HalTa Catarrh Onre Is a constitutional cure. Price, 75c. Harper's Weekly for September 10th will contain an important articlo by llrigadlcr-Gcncral A. W. Greeley, U. fci A., on Nanscn's "Farthest North;" Hon. Worthlngton Q Ford will contri bute a valuable articlo on Washington's farewell address. There will bo a double-page picture by tho lato C. S. lteinhart, entitled "Illgh-tldo at Get tysburg," and tho battlo of Lako Erie will bo Commemorated in tho "Naval Matties" series bv Jnmes Barnes, with nn illustration by Carlcton T. Chap tun n. Vv k r. OArC4 sxrv i BS3 44 Everybody LUC Everybody likes ' Battle Ax" because of it exceedingly fine quality Because of the economy there is in buying it Because of its low price, Irs the kind the rich men chew because of its high grade, and the kind the poor men can afford to chew because of its great size. A 5-cent piece of " Battle Ax" is almost twice the size of the 10-cent piece of other high grade l HI il VbajaajajaaaMsM brands. && GIVE GREATEST The acme of cycling comfort and delight is in store for the purchaser of a Columbia Bicy cle. It has no equal Its speed on track and road has been rwvwv C tMmmTMw&Mmm Versa of Imaglnatloit A Tonorable couplo from a far wmt ern town arrived late at night at if BOtiBido tavern. Just as the hubn4 was falling' aslcop, Ha thurraurvtff "Listen to tho urf Matilda; It'a ! rious; worth tho journey. 1 fear henrd it for forty years." In the rana ing they saw no sen from window piazza. On Inquiry the husband 4iaf covcrcd that it was a bowling alto? thnt had lulled him to sleep. -Boat Jourrml. That Pleasing Paralyzing Pis! IIow good It looks I How good it ial And how it hurts. Why not look into tha question, of PHI after Pie? Cat your pie nnd take Ayer'a Pills after, and pie will pleas and not paralyze. AYER'S Cathartic Pills CURE DYSPEPSIA. I c-,?.JJVVinnC.?J ?Ts:.'Ert-r7Vh35 s nnju M.C rfSj k Br" la-. J55 .Svi? sW' ..wOt . J Likes It" SATISFACTION. -V- TO ALL ALIKE. 1UU Standard of the World. The Columbia Catalogue Cresijby caUtac co the Columbia agent.-o by mail for two 2 -cent aUunpa. POPE MFG. CO., 2IARTFORD, CONN. branch Store and Agencies aa al most every city aid tows.