Hemingford herald. (Hemingford, Box Butte County, Neb.) 1895-190?, August 07, 1896, Image 5

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Mv nnnio Is John Smith plain
Smith, w thout chango or nddltlon of
vowel nnd 1 was In no wav discon
tented with it till I foil in lovo with
Kntlo Rogers. Kutio had never sncor
od nt it, but hor oldur sis lor, Miranda,
had mora than oucu hinted that it was
neither romantic nor uncommon; and
her fathor, in his somewhat lengthy
discourses about tlio Brtlsh aristo
cracy, had an aggravating way of
looking apologetically at mo ovory
time ho spoko of "a good name."
In our commercial community Smith
was counted a better name than
Rogers, ex-captuin of dragoons, who
could scnrcolv pay his thirty pounds
rout and novcr wore a (lucent hat.
I quite agreod with my noighbors on
these points till I fell in lovo with
Kutio and grow familiar with Miran
da's sontlmeuts about tlio ignoranco of
Fhlllstlno Rivorbaiik."
Captain Rogers was descended from
Fitzroger, who came over with tlio con
queror, and as I listened revoroutly
to tho h'stor, of the family progress
through eight conturles, tlioro was a
total collapso of my once fool nil pride in
belonging to what a local papor called
"ono of tho oldest families in Rlvor
bank." For Rlvorbauk was scarcely
ns old as my fathor. having grown into
a town with n speed rarely equalled
on th!s sido of tho Atlantic.
In a go no ml way I do not und or
value nn self, but it was with a deop
sense of humility thai I Implored tlio
descendant of Fitzrogor to become my
father-in-law. Wo wero aloiio togeth
er in the dining-room of tho thirty
pound houso, ho sitting in a shabby
armchair, I standing on a still shab
bier hearthrug. Ho looked up nl tho
"Bnttlo Roll of Hastings," which hung
over the mantolpieco, and down at tlio
fire, kept low by economical Miranda.
Then, having woighod tho past glories
of Fitzroger against tho present prico
of coals, ho accepted my proposal with
tho magnificent condescension of a
king consenting, for certain siato roa
sons, to bestow the hand of a royal
princess on an aspiring subject.
So Katie and I wero engaged, and
for u timo 1 was supremely happy. I
was not quite vain enough tosharo my
darling's opinion that I, John Smith,
was bolter worth worshipping than all
Carlylo's Heroes" put together; but
I was rathor easily convinced that I
was far too lino a follow to fear any
rivnl. So when Katio went on a visit
to Loudon there was no bitterness in
my regret, for I believed in hor and
At iirst I was not disturbed by Mi
randa's boasts about tlio advantages
her sistor was enjoying in "tlio best
society." but when tho London visit
cxtcmlod for weeks and mouths beyond
Its original limit I began to feel vaguo
ly uneasy. In those days Katie's let
ters, though loving, wero not long,
and slio more than once apologizod for
tlieir brevtv by pleading "a particu
lar engagement," the nature of which
eho never expla ued. My conildouco
sank, my jealousy arose.
At last sho came home, and then I
noticed a change in her that seriously
alarmed me. Sho was paler and qui
eter, and at times there was a wistful
look In hor oyos, suggestive of some
thing in hor mind. It could not bo
anxiety nbout her father's pecuniary
affairs, because about that time ho ap
peared in a new hat and Miranda kept
better liros. Tlieso outward and vis
ible feigns of prosperity would have
given mo sincere pleasure if it had not
been for tho suspicion that old Rogers
wns more than ever d.sposod to tako
the Norman conquost tono with me,
nml for the coiiniuly that Miranda's
sneers at "pooplo who cannot count
their grandfathers" wore all for my
What did tills sort of a thing mean?
Had Katio boon tompicd away from
mo br a lover with a longer podlgreo?
Would Rogers tell mo some dav, like
the father in old fashioned romance,
that ho had "othor views" for his
One evening I called much lator than
usual, having boon detained by an im
portant business matter in tlio neigh
boring city of Shipley. The outor door
of the houso was open, and I. in my
usual way, turned tho hnudlo of tho
vestibule door ami walked into the
drawing-room, which appoarod to bo
empty. I was just go ng to ring tho
boll for tho servant when I hoard a
pleading little voice bo hi ml mo:
"Oh. I sav, Jack-, don't do that!"
It was tho volco of Bob, tho young
est of Katio' s main young broth
ers, and turning sliarph around. I saw
his seared little iaco pooping betweon
the curtains drawn across tho bow win
dow. "Como hero, dear old Jack," ho on
troatod and stay with mo till sho goos
"What she?" I asked, as I stopped
behind the curtains to find Bob's
hithorto invisible form clad in a night
"Miranda," ho added in a tragic
Bob had bluo oyos and golden hair,
and in his white array ho looked like
an angol in a picture. But I rightly
guessed that he had doscendod from
the upper regions that night on no
angelic mission.
"I thought sho was safu up in tho
lumber-room for tho next half-hour,"
he explained, "and I got out of bod
and was slipping down to tho kltchou
for a taste of tho now jam. I know it
was my only chance. SIio'b so boastly
nioau nbout it wheu it's In pots. I
just got to tho hall when I hoard her
sneaking down stairs, so I ran iu horc.
Slio's iu tho dining-room now, and I
don't know whother sho's going up
again or down to tho kitchen."
"Don't bo a coward, my boy," 1
said, fooling it my duty to bo moral.
"Of courso Miranda will scold if she
finds you, but you must bear it liko a
Scold!'' repeated Bob, with scorn
In his subdued tones. "Do you think
I'd caro if It was only that?"
I understood tho full peril of tho
situation now. Miranda pridod hor
Bolf on doing a mother's duty to tho
motliorless boys, and I know that
whatever hor hand had found to do
sho did it with all hor might
"And It's just becauso 1 ain't a cow
ard I don't wnnt to meet her," went
on Bob, evidently mindful of tho tra
ditions of Fitzroger valor. "You see,
Jack, X could hit back if sho was a
man, but sho ain't, you know, and of
courso no fellow who is a goutleman
over hits a woman."
"Robert," 1 murmured, "you aro
tiio soul of chivalry."
'Oh, shut up, Jack Smith!"' and my
small brothcr-In-lnw-clect hold me
with a desperate grip. "Sho's coming
I peered cautiously betweon tho
heavy curtains, and caught a glimpse
of Miranda's lank form and lynx oyos.
Tho next moment she was vanishing,
but sho stoppod as Katie appeared at
tho door.
"Kate," oho said, Iu her thin, sharp
voice, "I was looking for you. I think
you might help mo pot tho jam. Smi th
may not bo hero to-night, and i f ho
comes lot him wait How palo you
look! I can toll you, m y dear, that
your appearanco has not improved
sinca you took u p with Filzherbert."
I stood with freezing blood behind
the curtains, wondering what awful
revelation was about to wreck my
life's happiness. Iu a lightning flash
of jealous imagination I saw Filzhor-
bort. No doubt ho was one of tho
swells Katio had mot in London. A
military swoll, ono of those handsome,
haughty guardsmen 1 had read about
iu soc cty novels.
"Miranda," sa'd Katio, "don't you
think I ought to toll Jack about Fitz
hcrhortr '
"No, I don't," said Miranda sharp ly.
'1 don't sou why the interests of our
family tiro to bo risked In a collision
witli the narrow mlddlo-class prejudic
es of Mr. John Smith."
Katie's voice sounded a little wenry
when sho spoke ngain.
"iTou know. Miranda, you wero hor
rliiod ourself when I first told you
about Fitzherbert's proposal.''
Miranda replied in n tone of cold
"I was more open to conviction than
you would find Mr. John Smith. We
who have boon rootod in English soil
for eight centuries naturally take larg
er views of life than mushrooms of
yesterday. Besides, your conduct in
this affair is justified by tho example
and approval of women in tho best so
ciety." What a world of whitod sepulchres!
I had never loved Miranda, but I had al
ways respected her. However skeptical
I might have been about her personal
charms, I had never doubted hor prin
ciples. Mirauda taught a class in tho
Sunday-school, worked a district on
slr.ct carity organization principles
anil was decorated with tlio order of
the Blue Ribbon. Yot hero was this
seem ngly virtuous Miranda applaud
ing hor sister's falseness to a true
lover, because it was tho fashion of
women in the best society to trample
on honest hearts.
"1 liato coueealmont." said Katie;
"and Jack is so truthful himself, that
I can't bear the Idea of decoiving him.
Oli, Miranda, dear, I was so happy
when F.lzliorbert made mo tho offer
that 1 never stopped to wonder what
Jack would think about it but now I
am m miserable that I sometimos think
I must give tip Fitzhorbort"
Rubbish!'' said Miranda, "and sel
fish rubbish, too. 1 wonder, Kato
Rogers, how you can tain iu that
way, wlten you know how useful Fitz
herbert's money is to your poor fa
ther." Oli, this was too awful! Kato not
not only false to mo, but actually so
mean as to take money from her now
lovor. I could stand it no longer. I
wrenched m wolf from poor little
Bob's grasp, and stood serenly faciug
the two girls.
Miranda fled from the room. Katio
.stood white and still.
"Pray, do not give up Filzherbert
on my humblo account." I said scorn
fully. "Do not let my vulgar proju
dico In favor of truth und honosty in
terfere with the wider morality of tho
best society. Marry Filzherbert to
morrow, if you like, and bo as happy
as you deserve to bo."
Tho color rushed back into Katie's
face. Tho light sparkled iu her oyes.
Sho actually laughed.
Thank you very nittuli, Jack," bho
said, "butevon with your kind permls
hion I can't marry F.tzherbert The
fact is," and her bluo eyes danced,
Filzherbert is married."
"And you daro to toll mo," I cried
In wild rage, "that you have not only
accepted love but money from a mar
ried man?"
Sho lookod straight into rcy furious
fnco with hor laughing oyes.
"Filzhorbort is not amarrlod man,"
sho said,
"I was novor good nt guosslng rid
dlos," I said, loftily; "and as I ahi not
in the mood for thorn to-night, I glvo
this ono up. If Filzhorbort Is uot a mar
rlcd man. what, in hoavon's nnmo, is
Cloar camo tho answor In tho swcot,
gay. girlish voicot
"Filzherbert Is a married woman."
Then, with tlio crushing conscious
ness of having mado a fool of mysolf,
I llBtonod humbly to Ratio's llttlo
'Fitzhorbort Is a West End mlllinor,
and was Aunt Clara's maid boforo hor
marriage, Hor nnmo Is not roally
Filzhorbort, but somolhlng quito ordi
nary, llko Brown or bmllh oil, I bog
your pardon, Jackl Sho was always
fond of mo. and I ofton amusod mysolf
looking through hor now fashions.
Ono day, whllo 1 was waiting for Aunt
Clara, who had gone to her dentist, n
fussy old lady camo into tho shop, nnd
was vory angry becauso nono of hor
now Paris bonnets suited hor. Sho wns
ono of tlio host customers, nnd poor
Fitzhorbort was in dlspair whon sho
wns leaving tho shop In a rngo.
Well, Jack, I havo qui to n gonitis for
millinory. Ono of our nncoslors was
n painter, and Aunt Clara says 1 havo
his artistic oyo for color and form.
Anyhow, I always scorn to know ox
actly what suits a fnco. I porsuadod
tho old lady to sit down again, and
with Filzhorbort's permission I mado
n fow ahorat ons in ono particular
bonnot. Tho rosult was so becoming
that tho old lady was charmed. 'You
aro a heaven-bom mlllinor, my denr,'
sho said. 'Why don't you go In for
that sort of thing? It is all tho fash
ion among tho host pooplo. Aunt
Clara called for mo presontly, aud was
quito struck with tho now idoa. After
a long talk with Fitzhorbort it was
decided that I should go tho shop
ovcry day and qualify for tho position
of millinory aide-de-camp. I bocamo
quito popular with tho ctistomors, es
pecially tho elderly ones. I lovo old
ladios, and delight in making thorn
look lovely, and somo of thorn threat
ened to leavo Fitzhorbort unless I
undertook tho arrangement of thoir
bonnets and caps for tho term of my
single life. Fitzhorbort offered mo
very liboral pny for my assistance, and
I was so glad to think of holping poor
old daddy that at first I forgot about
you and your posslblo objection to
marrying a young woman who worked
for a shop, but I thought of this aftor
wards, and was always fighting with
mv conscience about tolling you tho
truth. But, indeed, there aro many
lady milliners in London, nnd oh,
Jack, I boo yon don't mind so vory
much, aftor all!"
Tho precise nature of my conduct on
this occasion nocd not bo hero record
The br'dal wrcatli was a present
froni Fitzhorbort Household Words,
Nantucket's Jailer.
Apropos of Nautuckot, ono hoars
somo rather odd sayings and of somo
quaint hnppon ngs there.
"You see, wo aro somewhat out of tho
way." said ono of tlio islanders; "so
tramps seldom trouble us, nnd it is on
ly whon our summer visitors como thnt
we think of locking our doors at
Last fall a man was trlod for petty
larceny, and sentenced by tho Judge
to threo mouths in jail. A few days
after tho trial, tho Judgo, accompan
ied by tho sheriff, was on Ids way tc
tlio Boston boat, whon they passed u
man sawing wootl.
Tho sawyer stopped his work, touch
ed his hat, and snid, "Good morning.
Tho Judgo lookod at him a momont,
passed on u short distance, liion turn
ed to glance backward, with tho ques
tion, "Why, Sheriff isn't thnt tho mnn
I sentenced to three months iu jail? '
'Yos." replied tho Shorlff. hosiUit
ingly "yes that's tho mnn; but you
you see, Judgo, wo wo havon't any
one in jail now, and wo thought it a
useless exponso to hiro somebody to
koop tho ja.l for throe months just for
tills ono man; so I gavo him tho jail
key, aud told him that if he'd
sleep thoro nights it would bo all
right " Harper's Magazine.
Overheard at the Zoo.
There was a largo crowd around tho
big brick nnd granite tank that is be
ing built at tho north end of tho ani
mal houso.
."What's that for, my love?"
"For tho hippopotami."
Tho what?"
"Hippopotami! Thoro arc two now,
you know."
You mean hippopotamuses."
"No I don't; I moan hippopotami.
That's plural for h ppopotamus."
"My love, excuso mo, butyou'ro nn
ass. Hippopotami is Latin and hippo
potamuses is English. You can't tell
mo anything about paohydorniatotip
mammals." New York Herald.
Couldn't Fool Him.
Old Boy "Thomas, If my wife asks
you where I am tell her that I have
gouo to tho opora."
Sorvaut Certainly, sir, cortainly;
but where are you really going in oaso
anbyody eho ahould want to know?"
Texas 8i flings.
Conway Castlo.
At longth ono perfect day, wo went
(o tho castlo. Tho old man who has
tho place In chargo took tho small foe,
unlocked tho door, and loft us to our
own dov.cos. Tho wholo glorous ruin
wns to all Intents nnd purpose! our
own. During that long goldon after
noon not a soul camo noar w, not a
voloo dlsturbud us. Could ono doscrlbo
n cloud, or a wnvo, or n sunsot, so that
a blind man could sco It with his mind's
oyo? Could ono givo a doaf matt an
Idoa of a bird song or tho poal of an
organ? As woll try to do this as to do
scrlbo tho aolomn grnndour of those
tlmo-worn, Ivy-grown, moss-covorod
battlomonts, loft now to-Uho swcot
winds of hoavon, tho flocks"of rooks
thnt fly In and out of turrot nnd towor,
and tho climbing rosos that brlghton It
with thoir bonuty. Irom court to
court wo wnudorod, from tower to
towor, from battlomont to battlomont
Hero, all unroofod nnd opon to tho
stars, lies tho groat banqueting hall,
moro bonutlful, moro Imposing, now, It
may bo, In its ivy-wroathod desolation,
than when tho gay rovolers of Edward's
court mado its vast archos ring with
song nnd laughter. Horo still aro tho
wldo iiroplacas. rich carvings, tho vory
ghosts of past comfort nnd delight.
Horo is the oratory, with its tracortcd
window and lofty grouod archos,
where Eloanor nnd Faithful prayed.
Horo Is hor bod-chamber, communi
cating With that of the K ug, and still
rotaiuing tracos of Its rich ornamenta
tion. Loading from it is an nrohod ro
coss still callod Queen Eleanor's Oriol,
tho windows of which, according to a
contemporary poot, must havo boon
linoly Btainoil:
la her oriel there slio wan,
Clothed well with royal glass;
Filled It was with Imngery,
Every window by nnd by."
Horo nro stairways worn by foot thnt
tvoro stilled long contur.es ago, and, In
tho deop thickness of tho walls, tho
passagos, dark and torturous, through
which thoso foot atrodo on orrands of
business, or ploasuro, or intrigue.
Hero nro stono bonchos thnt scorn still
to kcop tho impress of tho forms that
through tho slow generations sliapod
and hollowod thorn. Wo lookod
through openings in tho "oranniod
walls," through which death and des
truction had rained on many a besieg
ing army.
Far below us, as wo stood on tho
lofty battlements, lay tho waited town,
with its massive somloircular towers,
so powerful otico for defouso or attack,
so useless now as tlioy slopt in that
sorenc.it air. Closo about tho castlo
clustorod tho cottages and gnrdous of
tho people, but they only added to tho
impressivonoss of tho picture. Just nt
our foet wns a pretty stono house, its
courtyard gay with llowors, the castlo
wall forming ono of its boundaries.
Jttliu Dorr, t' Atlantic
A Distinguished Houge.
"Ouo of the most comical things I'vo
evor hoard was told mu in Caucasus,"
said Dudioy Winston, tho young man
who accompanied his fathor on tho mis
sion to Persia. "It was iu Tiftos, tho
capital of Georgia. You know thoro' s
an m dean storo thoro a big placo
of business wlioro all sorts of Yankco
notions nro dealt out at enormous profit
to tho natives. I droppod in there.
Ono of tho objects of Interest to which
the Russian salesman dlroctod my
Bpoeial attontion was a patent polnto
"Doso Instrument," ho said, "cos
medd by zo faymoos 'ouso of Pa
I was astonished.
What house did you say?"
"Zo faymoos 'ouse of Pat Aug."
"Novor hoard of it," I said; "I guess
you aro mistaken."
'Mcestcckon? No, saro. I havo
often hoard of zo 'ouso; and I havo
ofton soon zo nnmo of zc 'ouso. I vill
show him to you now. Oh, it is a
house which enjoys groat famo horo."
And with that ho looks for a sp col
men potato poolor and bring ono out
"Zero, sare," ho sajs, "ees zo name
ongravod in zo motal. Seel"
"1 burst out laughing uutil my sides
ached. Thoro was tho legend: "Pat
Aug. 17, 1873.' And tho 'Pat Aug.'
part of it ho had taken to bo tho firm's
name. I found that the potato peelor
was famous under tho name of 'Pat.
Aug.' all ovor tho Caucasus." CAi'ca
go Herald.
It Should Recommend Him.
"Robocca, you shall not shpeak mlt
dot Moses Lovl vouco moro."
"0 f adder, you preak ml no hoard t
Vo vos almost engaged. Vy shall I
not shpoak mlt him?"
"Ho haf shoatud me. Ho haf sold
mo a pasto diamond for a shouulno
"0 father, dot shouldt rccommond
him to you as a son-in-law. If ho can
fool a viso man liko you, see vat a
fortuno ho haf in dor chowolry
"Veil, Robocca. you vas schmarder
as i thought. Get married von you
liko. I am nukchious to go into
barduorship with mine sou-in law!"
Snn Francisco IWtsp.
An Inquisitive Mind.
Bertie Mamma, papa told 'me that
thoso corners of the leaves of tho book
were dogs' oars.
Mamma Yes, Bortie.
Bertie Well, mamma, whoso dogs'
ears aro thoy? Judge.
Soma Real Saying3 of Real Chil
dren. Walter had boon lata to broakfast
sovoral mornings Iu succession.
His mamma, wishing to linpross up
on him tho bonuty of punotunlllv,
talked quito soriously nbout tho mat
tor for somo tlmo.
He pondered ovor his oatmont for a
fow moments, thou, looking up, asked
Iu n vory puzzled tono of volco:
"Mamma, who scolds God whon ho's
Into to breakfast?"
We woro talking nbout tho war at
the dinner tablo ouo dny.
I had rolntod sovoral Inohlonts thnt
had como undor my observation, whllo
living noar a court houso wlioro faro
woll ban quots woro given to the do
parting soldiers.
Wnltor appoared vory muoh Interest
ed, and finally said, with an air that
was intended to bo compl inontnry, "1
thtulc you must havo boon well 'quaint
od with Musttslom, wasn't you?"
His papa was vory tall, and ho Lj
an unbounded ml miration fur hlinT
My husband appropriates only five
toot one inch of porpoudiotilur to him
self, nnd Walter, though fond of him,
cannot bo reconciled to his compara
tive brevity.
Ho oanio to mo olio day with n vory
dissatisfied face, and said, "Mr. War
ren, was Mr. Warron naughty why
God didn't imiko him nice aud tall llko
my papa?"
Nettie, agod sovon, exhibited an ap
preciation of tho beautiful and tin ab
horronoo of the ugly In a rather start
ling manner ouu dny.
Wo hoard a llttlo child crying in
front of tho house, nnd rushing to tho
door, woro informed by n nurso maid
that our little girl hnd slapped hor
baby "right spang in tho fnco.
Wo didn't know just what spang"
meant, but concluded from thcomphn
sls plaoed upon it that it was not a
synonym for "gontlo."
Questioning Nottlo, wo woro inform
ed with decision: "Yos, mamma, I did
slap It; nnd any baby that homed itsolf
as homely as that ono, whon thoro' s
protty babios nil ovor tho park ought
to bo slapped.
L ko many othor children, Nottlo
had a foudnoss for "preaching."
Going behind her littlo table, she
would pilo it with books, and "hold
forth" in tho rogulntion "sormon
voico," "praying volco." nnd "bono
dictlon volco," ns slio called them.
Ouo dav sho was exhorting an Imag
inary audlouco to "throw away all sin
boforo It gets too big," whon hor atten
tion was attraotod by a man otttsldo
with an immense nosu. Almost imme
diately after him camo a boy with a
whoolbarrow, and sho ovldoutly
thought tlio timo for prnctical Illustra
tion had como.
Hor shrill tone droppod ntoncoto
thoso of solomu warning, ns sho said:
"If you don't It'll got like that man's
no3o, so big they'll put it on a wheel
barrow and wheol It out Let us pray."
Yankee Blade.
Buying a Hat
A woman of 40 and a girl of 18 went
into a fashionable millinory store on
Woodward avenue and bogan pricing
Horo' s a bunnit mother, that'll
suit ye," said tho girl, taking a whito
laco affair iu her brown hand.
"Taln't my stylo," said tlio woman,
('flttlna T wnnl. it li fit n n fit l.rmtitil Imt-
tliot I kin wear to meet n' or mllkin',
liko that yore."
It was a black straw hat turned up
ou tho side with a cluster of whlto
"I llko tho poslos," said tho woman,
lay.ng it on ovor her sunburned face,
"it 'minds me of a hat 1 had on when
I fust see your father. That was
twenty yeara ago this very summer.
How do it look?"
"Fust-rate," said tho girl, "pap
won't know you. Lor, mother, you
look younger than mo now, ef you
ain't got s'lnuch color."
Tho mother looked hard at hersolf
in tho glass. Thoro was a groat dual
of glass und very little molhor, fur she
was a small, spare woman nnd the hat
covered her up.
"I'm burned, " sho snid, "'twixt
cooklu' an' harvestln', but when I
wero your ago, Sailio, my cheeks wore
redder than youru be. Do ye think
now that in a high wind sleh as wo
hov out homo I could koop it on."
"Wo f anion them on with this,''
said the mlllinor, handing thu custom
er n long phi.
"Thank ye. ma'am but my head
ain't a plucush on. Agiu 1 run thot
pin through it I wouldn't hov enuy
housu loft You may put on a pair of
strings and I'll tako tho hat 1 ain't
hod a uew ouo now for ovor four
years. '
The strings being supplied, tho hat
was paid for and put on. It was nn
anomalous thing, tied hard down on
the head of its owner, but as tho two
women went out the faces of both
beamed with happiness ovor tho in
congruous purchase. Perhaps the girl
solaced herself with the thought that
thu hat that was not too young for
tho mother might not bo too old for
tho daughter. Detroit Free tress.
Thlmr even un pretty well after all. .Men
throw banana skint oa the sidewalk, and then
the luuaiia skins throw raeu on I lie sldcwullc
Uurl'HjtiH Frt. J'rttt,
Visitor "I jour mother In lo-dar, my
boy!" Cauilia child "No, ilr, the's Uuini; up
preserves. St to llavtn Xcjiu " "r
Itomnrlcnt.lo Apparatus UneJ
Touting luteriinl Wound.
Police Surgoon Oldshuo has pur
chased for the dopartmoiit of public
safety n BUrg.cal apparatus, which, It
Is expootod, will bo of immense benefit
iu certain cases of shoot ng. stabbing,
etc., that are brought to tho nttont.on
of the poll co nt the various pollco sta
tion houses. Many of tho wounds
which nro received by pooplo In fights
nro In tho abdomen, and this apparatus
Is for tho purpose of determining
whothor tho intestines nro injured, a
very Important point In tlio treatment
of persons so s.tuatud.
By un explanation afterward afford
ed thu tiso of this apparatus will be the
means of saving many n man's life.
Tho apparatus has lately boon invent
ed, and Police Surgeon Oldshuo aud
Dr. Pollouk have buen tho first to test
its virtues here. It consists of a rubber
retort, to which is attached a long rub
ber tube, and Is very simple ns It ap
pears laid out Iu u doctor's oillce.
Supposing that n man is brought to
ouo of the station homos, shot or slab
bed hi tho abdomen, It is difficult to
toll whether any of the intestines are
punctured. Thu rotort is filled with
hjdrogou gas, which the surgeon can
easily prepare, and this gas is injoclod
into tho vital parts with considerable
pressure. A tube is placed iu the
wound and if tlioro is n wound iu tho
Intestines tlio gas is bound to come out
by way of the wound aud into the tube.
By npplying a lighted match to tho
end of the tube It can do soon whothor.'
the gas Is escaping, for, If tho gas (j
thoro It will iguito. On tho othor
hand, If tlioro is no wound iu tho In
testines tho gas will escape by way of
tlio mouth, aud by moans of propor In
struments thoro aud the application of
u light it can bo soon if tlio hydrogen
gas is thus escaping.
A roportor, lu talking with Police
Surgoon Oldshuo last night about tho
now apparatus, inquired:
"But is not hydrogon gas highly
oxplosivo? and Is It not unsafo to in
troduce it into tho body In sttoli a
Dr. Oldshuo ropliod; "That is tho
opinion; but Dr. Sllnos, tho Inventor
of tho apparatus, has followed tho plan
with great success, as has Dr. Mor
docai Prico of Philadelphia. Thoy havo
shown thnt this is not only Innocuous,
but an absolute diagnosis of intestinal
"Well, but of what bonolit is such a
knowledge? '
"if the intostiuo Is wouncod tho
oporatlon of laparotomy can bo per
formed by tho oponing of tho abdo
men, and tho wound of tho intostine
taken up nnd tho catgut ligaturos ap
pllod to bring tlio edges together, aud
with general antiseutio troatmont tho
pntlont has a much greater chance of
recovery. It will afford ovory oppor
tunity to Bavo thu livos of porsous stab
bod or shot, or otherwise wounded in
tho nbdomon."
Pollco Surgoon Oldshuo attended
tho mooting of the State Medical So
o oU a short tlmo ago, and tlioro piekod
up tho po.uter about tho now appar
atus. Ho is always ou tho lookout for
what benefits surgery iu his position,
and decidod to introduco tho now
Dr. Pollock asked that ho bo callod
for the first caso, wlioro the doctor
would mako tho oxpurimout Not
long ago a Polo wasshot iu Soho, and
Police Surgoon Oldshuo was callod to
altond him. The wound was in tho
nbdomon. Drs. Oldshuo nnd Pollock
decided to try tho now apparatus. By
tho action of tlio hydrogen gas it was
found that there was no abdominal
wound. It was further doclded thou
that tho patlont bo not oporatod on,
hut kept quiet though tho bullet was
In lis body. A fow days sufficed for
the recovery of tho Pole.showmg that,
for tho first caso at least, tho apparatus
mado a correct diagnosis. Pittsburg
True, It May be a Comanche
An Indian wnrhoop is nol n Sioux
thing sound. P.tlsburg Chronicle.
Another Trade Deception
"Feathers marked down." advertis
es a doalor. That is dishonest Life.
A Suggestion to tha Maxim
The rolling stono has yet to loarn
what It wants to gat hor moss for.
1'icuyune. mt
A Reasonable Ra quest
Lady (angrll to tramp at the back
door) You can't got any thlug to eat
here. y
Tramp (politely) I bog your par
don, madam; I don't want anything
to oat I havo just eaten a goot din
ner at tlio hotitio of your neighbor,
but if you can givo mo a cup of coffea
and n clgarolto you would placu me
uudor many obligat.ons. Wwti -g'.oa
A Dangerous Kind of Sport
Tlio man who does everything "on
his own hook" is llkoly to got caught
ouo of thosu days. Lowell Citizen.
Customer (in clsr aton-) 'Glnnne a trooi
clpnr, hoy. SutUlu' that imoke free." Bo
"1 cuius 1 cau't ro je, boss; there' no
clear In tuh store that smokes lesa'a Of
ceuts." Tim'. .. .