THE WAGEWORKER By W. M. MAUPIN liscolh, HKBRAIKA Pennsylvania boy 19 years old haa never heard of heaven. That's a devil of a note! ' It la bow reported that the lama ol Tibet is an idiot Bats in the belfry of the roof of the world! A scientist tells us that "metals get tired." Now you know why the gold gave-out before it got to you. Women are taking aeroplane trips in France. But women have for some time been driving cabs In Paris, which is much more dangerous. If Bibles were actually made a part of the furnishing of hotel rooms a good many individuals would be sur prised to find what interesting reading the book really is. From the year-1880 to the close of 1906 22,840 men met death in the coal mines of the United States. Not since 1897 has the annual list numbered less than 1,000, and each year the number has grown larger. That Rvanston man who has found a way to neutralize the force of grav ity does not seem to have arrived at any sort of business understanding with the gentlemen who are exploiting tbe aeroplanes. It Is comforting to know that the probable first price of aeroplanes is to be only $4,000. That brings the new machine well Into competition with speed devices on the ground and gives a man a choice. One of the richest women In St. Louie, says the society women in that city, belongs to the Ananias club. Society in that unhappy city seems to be falling either on parlous times or unusually captious critics. By coming down unexpectedly a few days ago a balloon completely wrecked a garden belonging to a hard-working man who lives in Germany. Is it not time for some insurance company to issue policies covering possible dam ages resulting from knocks by stray flying machines? The wife of an M. P. writes in the Lady's Realm: "The balder a man is the more successful he seems to be in politics. Not a man with flowing locks is to be seen on either of the front benches, sacred to the great, wise and eminent of the . house of commons." Miss Anna Morgan, heiress to $100, 000,000, says a Vienna paper, was driven out of Berlin, where she hoped to study politico-social conditions, by tbe beggars, high and low, nobility and others, who no sooner heard of the ar rival of the rich American girl than they set siege to her dollars. Col. Ooetbals announces that the Panama canal will be ready for open ing January 1, 1915, the date planned. 8o now we can all engage our pas sage and our hotel rooms for the open ing exercises, and the competition for places on tbe "first ship to pass through the canal" may begin. A German physician has calculated that the diseases to which the human frame . is liable number more than 1.100. But there are living plenty of ex-office boys who in their time have had more than that, besides killing off whole families of relatives, when there really was a chance of the home team's taking the pennant Sir Walter Parratt, the newly ap pointed professor of music in Oxford university, is an . enthusiastic chess player. On one occasion he undertook to play two men at once and at the same time play on the "pianoforte from memory pieces selected by those present from any ot the classical writers tor that instrument. A circus lion got loose in Bound Brook, N. J., the other night, and be fore it had more than scratched a camel, eaten a heifer and got itself shot, 473 paragrapbers the country over had suggested how much cheaper, .nicker and pleas an ter it would have been for Mr. Roosevelt to go to Bound Brook than to the African veldt. A committee has been created by the British government to consider the dangers attendant on the use of lead in pottery and to report how far these can be obviated by improved ap pliances and methods in lead processes by the limitation of harmless com pounds for raw lead, or of other mate rials for lead, and by other means, A business concern in Park Row which runs about all night has missed scores of incandescent light globes lately. Slnee these globes are fairly expensive, and the item of loss had become pretty sizable, a detective was put on the job. It took him just 24 hours to find that the globes are as good as cash over the bars of Park Row and Bowery ginmills one globe, one drink of whisky. Another "Adamless Eden" has been started on Long Island. It's none of onr business, of course, but we'd like to know who's going to button their waists behind and get up in the night to close the windows when it rains T 1 A 15-year-old wife is seeking a dl- volrce; a 16-year-old wife in New York, saved from suicide, says this it her fifth attempt to take her own life It there is a moral lesson anywhere in these facts it would seem to be against marriage for such very young girls. PLAN TO SAVE FUEL RAILROADS SEEK SERVICES OF EXPERT FIREMEN. Unskillful Tending of Fires in Locomo tives Means Heavy Loss for Lines in the Course of a Year. When one sees heavy clouds of sooty black smoke pouring from the stack of a loco motive and a shower, of attend ant cinders in its trail he is apt to regard it merely as a discomfort to any one in its path. As a mat ter of fact, however, it is more than that, inasmuch as it signifies that fuel is being wasted and- money lost for the company. Indeed, one of the most perplexing problems confronting steam railroads is that of procuring perfect combustion in the fire boxes of locomotives, and as a corollary, pre venting those clouds of smoke. When it is considered that the 160 railway systems of the country operate up ward of 20,000 engines, it is easy to see that the waste of even a small amount of fuel on each trip ot each one of these locomotives would amount to a very pretty sum in the course of a year. It is not surprising, therefore, to learn that the railroads are endeavor ing to stop this waste.' The old-fashioned idea as to the know how" of locomotive firing was that it could be acquired only through the experience that comes from han dling a shovel in front of a firebox, with the constant necessity of keeping up the steam pressure under all condi tions of track, grade and weather. Modern practice has not altered this view, but it has been discovered that the knowledge gained in this way does not always give entirely satisfactory results, and the various railway com panies are gradually adopting the plan of combining instruction in the form of lectures and demonstrations with that learned in the cab of a locomo tive. The railways are moved to do this not only from motives of econ omy but also for the comfort of their passengers and of residents along the line. This class room work however, is the least ot the instruction. The lec turer and his assistants ride the en gines sometimes for hundreds of miles, showing by example the correct smokeless firing. Besides these in structors there are a number of fore men on each division whose sole duty it is to ride the "ngines and coach the firemen. These men are engineers who have risen from the trade of fire man, and are essentially practical men. Men are also stationed at many points along the road noting the color of the smoke coming out of the en gine stacks and recording the number of the engine and the time of its pass ing. If there is a preponderance of dark smoke, showing fuel waste, the fireman and engineers are questioned, and unless they afford some explana tion other than their own negligence suspension from duty for ten days fol lows. If, however, there is some suf ficient reason for the smoke, a road foreman will travel' on tbe engine during Its next trip and will show how to overcome the defect. If the trouble is due to a structural fault the engine is imme diately retired to the yard for re pairs. These pre cautions are fur tlor augmented by the equipping of the engine with a smoke consumer which with proper care from fireman renders the engine lmost smokeless. Here's a Fake. An Englishman at the Waldorf was boasting of the immense railroad traf fic of his country, the speed of the trains, the safety appliances, the paucity of accidents and the vast ton nage of the freight lines. Some of his listeners were deeply impressed as most Americans are when a British industrial captain speaks. But one man in the group retorted: "I have been a student of English railroading for many years, and agree with much you have said, my lord; but I imagine you have not kept your eye on American progress. Why, sir, we have coal trains that are so long the engineer has to carry in his cab a powerful field glass to see the caboose at the tail end." His lordship was much im pressed. N. Y. Press. Combination Locomotive. A new electric locomotive is being Used on the Puget Sound electric rail road. It consists of a combination lo comotive and flat car. The mechanism is placed under the floor of the car, leaving space for. carrying rails, poles and any apparatus that may be re quired in the repair of the track. The cab of the locomotive is placed in the center of the car aud extends across the entire width. The cab is raised sufficiently so that the motorman may have a clear view of the track over the materials carried on the car. Ex change. Proposed Railroad to Quezaltenango. On June 16, 1908, the president of Guatemala, Senor Manuel Estrada Ca brera, established by an executive de cree a commission of engineers to se lect and definitely survey a railroad to connect Quezaltenango in the west ern part of the country with the pres ent railroad system of the reoublic. CT DAMAGE DONE BY TRAMPS. Undesirable Passengers Cause Heavy - Loss to Railroads. A writer in a current magazine de scribes railroad tramps as a grave menace not merely to interstate com merce, but to the safety of the travel ing public As a rule, a train is in charge of five men only the engineer, the fireman, the conductor and two brakemen. Hoboes riding "blind bag gage" on the trucks beneath' the cars, or snugly ensconced in the grain in half-filled freight cars, or even as sometimes happens lying across the backs of pigs or sheep in cattle cars, can not only make trouble for train crews, but by turning the angle cocks can apply the air brakes instantly, thus causing frequent wrecks and oc casional loss of life. It is compara tively easy for a veteran of the road to elude the trainmen in a kind of hide-and-seek game, played in and out of the small doors in the tops of the cars and over the roofs of a moving freight train. There is hardly an ac cident that does not include tile death of a tramp who was riding the trucks or traveling as a stowaway in the cor ner of a box car. Very often the cars are set on fire by the matches of these undesirable passengers. The only way to safeguard life and property is to visit with the severest penalties all in fractions of the law inhibiting tres passing on railroad property. The courts have been too lenient. DARING ACT OF A TRAINMAN. Climbs to Front of Engine and Makes Heroic Rescue. Marion R. Lux, a locomotive fire man on the Chicago, Burlington & Quincy railroad, was awarded a silver medal and the sum of $1,000 toward the purchase of a home for his act in rescuing a child from in front of his locomotive. The train was running about 25 miles an hour when the engineer saw a child on the tracks about six or seven car lengths ahead. He whistled and put on brakes. Lux, realizing that something was wrong, sprang from his seat on the left side of the cab, and, looking ahead, saw the child, who had then fallen across the rail. Luz went through the cab window and along the running board to the pilot beam and then over the handrail, but seeing that he conld not reach the footboard of the pilot in time, he plunged forward with arms extended, intending to clear the rail and knock the child from the tracks. Instead he landed on his stomach, but instantly rolled over and clear of the track, carrying the child with him, the; wheels of the locomotive, . which had' then been slowed to ten miles an hour, almost grazing the two. Train Wrecked by Elephant. An extraordinary railroad accident happened recently in Siam, on the Royal State railway, between Ban Fhaji and Bangkok. Late one evening, while rounding a Blight curve, a heavy goods ' train,.' drawn, by fwo engines, dashed into a large wild elephant which had strayed on to the track. The force of the impact was terrific, and both the engines were overthrown, the leading one plunging over the em bankment and the second capsizing and falling across the line. Two men were killed and several injured, the brake van was smashed into a shape less mass and 13 cars were derailed and six telescoped. The elephant was killed and Its body hurled 60 feet from the track. This is the second accident of the kind that has occurred this year in Siam, an elephant haying r been killed last February near L.apDun, with, however, only slight damage to the train. ' Make Find of Rails and Ties. "What amounts almost to an arch aeological railroad find has been made recently in the Allegheny river, be tween Oil City and Franklin, Pa.," says The Railroad Man's Magazine. It goes on to say: "Half a mile of ties and rails were found. The rails bore the stamped trade-mark 'B. B. I. C. indicating that they were made by the Brady's Bend Iron Company. This was the first company to manufacture iron for railroads west of the Alle ghenies. As the Franklin branch of the Erie when it was the Atlantic & Great Western, and the Franklin & Jamestown branch of the Lake Shore, both followed the course of the river, there would jfeem to be some doubt as to which of the roads lost a half- mile of track in a landslide, without resort to further records. The Brady's Bend Company has been out of busi ness for about forty years." Cat Had Free Ride. The usually strict railroad rules were not enforced on the express train that came into New London, Conn., the other day. When the car inspec tors got to work on the train, one of them discovered, lying on the truck, a large cat, of fierce demeanor and so dusty that its natural color could not be ascertained.' Some friendly over tures were made and rejected with hisses and yowls, so the conductor concluded to let the cat-tramp con tlnue her ride unmolested. He told the trainmen of its presence, and they kept watch at the stations at which the train stopped; but the cat never left its perch until the train rolled into the station at New York; then it fled, as if going to see a near relation. It is believed that the animal got on the car at Boston. Locomotives for Austria. American and English locomotivs are to be used largely on the private railroad lines in Austria, about 2,000 miles of which are to be purchased by the government next year at a cost of about $15,000,000. WINTER WORK OF DIAMOND ARTISTS MAJORITY OF BASEBALL PLAYERS HAVE OTHER OCCUPATIONS DURING OFF SEASON. UPWARD TREND OF PERSONNEL Profession , Rapidly Changing to One of Class Pitcher Mathewson En gaged in Insurance Business While Bresnahan Is a Detective Some Own Farms and Ranches. There are few of the fans who sit in the stands during the baseball season and watch the big league teams battle for their championships who give a thought to -what- the players do all w inter. Many appear to take it for granted that the men who cavort about the diamond in their spiked shoes and ball togs do nothing but loaf all winter. But such is not the case. The majority of the exponents of the national game are a busy lot during the closed season in baseball. Some own farms, others are agents for companies of various kinds, still others do police work or run-billiard and pool rooms, while at least one, Joe McGinnity, owns an iron foundry. There are a few, of course, who do nothing during the months when cold weather makes ball playing an im possibility, but these are greatly in the minority. There was a time in the history of baseball when the ambitions of the players appeared to drift toward the ultimate ownership of thirst-quenching -emporiums,'; bnt since that epoch the game has taken great upward strides in the sense of its personnel. A glance through the early lives of the players will reveal that many have had the advantage of college educa tions. Not a few have even taken up various professions. Baseball as a vocation is no longer looked upon as a sort of good haven for the castoffs of other branches of business. It is lvulier credited with being a step up vard in the workaday world. Al though no degrees are given to the masters of tbe art to tack on to the end of their names, nevertheless the handle-of -pitcher, cateher, infielder or outfielder will now admit their pos sessors to good society, and will go a long way as a recommendation. Thus it will be readily seen that the men who swing the willows and who toss the leather sphere about do not find it over-difficult -to.-, secure paying situations during that portion of ' the year when the bat, ball, mask and glove lie dormant. Christy Mathew son, the premier twirler of the Giants, has recently branched out in the in surance business; John J. McGraw, manager of the New York National League club,, runs a billiard .parlor; Johnny Kling,-. the , Cub's catcher, is also an enthusiast of ' the cue and ivory balls, and controls several such parlors; Roger Bresnahan is a detect ive in Toledo. Pitcher Joe McGinnity has an iron foundry in Indian Territory, and when he isn't playing ball he devotes his time to managing his business. Luther Taylor, also a slab artist on the payroll of John T. Brush, runs a general store in his home town, and he is by far the most popular citizen of the place. Stony McGlynn, St. Louis Cardinal pitcher, spends his "idle moments" as an officer of .the', peace in-. York, ; Pa. Addie Joss, Cleveland pitcher, is a sporting writer. Harry White, a White Sox twirler, studied dentistry at Georgetown university, and when he isn't pulling teams out of a hole he's extracting teeth. Fred Clarke, manager of the-Pittsburg Pirates, owns a ranch in Kansas. Clarke Griffith, one time manager of the Highlanders, also has a ranch in Montana. But of all the occupations in which the ball players engage, the oddest is that of Roy Thomas,-: the Buccaneers' center fielder. While traveling around the circuit, and in winter as well, he solicits orders for a wholesale undertaking establish ment. Honus Wagner, admittedly the greatest batter of the age, owns a farm and passes much of his time thereon and makes it pay well, too. Yale football coaches have .decided to focus their attention just at present on the center situation. It is said to be unsatisfactory, and two of the best centers in Yale . history have been summoned to help sokve it Dr. George B. Cutten and Phil Stillman. Mainer, the Quaker halfback, has developed into one of the best line plungers of the year. He is the kind of a back that can repeat after a hard lunge. He scored Penn's first five points against Brown in three successive smashes through center. West Point seems to base about 50 per cent, of her reliance to win games -on Dean. He is a fair back and a good punter, but many think the , army is taking big chances in not developing another kicker. Means seems to be a find at punting and may develop into a good substi tute for Capt. Hollenback of Penn. He sends the ball end over end, and it is hard to handle. The r-.. General "Demand of the Well-informed of the World has always been for a simple, pleasant and efficient liquid laxative remedy of known value; a laxative which physicians could sanction for family use because its com ponent parts are known to them to be wholesome and truly beneficial in effect, acceptable to the system and gentle, yet prompt, in action. In supplying that demand with its ex cellent combination of Syrup of Figs and Elixir of Senna, the California Fig Syrup Co. proceeds along ethical lines and reliea on the merits of the laxative for its remark able success. That is one of many reasons why Syrup of Figs and Elixir of Senna is given the preference by the Well-informed. To get its beneficial effects always buy the. genuine manufactured by, the Cali fornia Fig Syrup Co., only, and for sale by all leading druggists. Price fifty centl per bottie. . TOO MUCH FOR YANKEE. English Munchausen Had Shade the Better of Fellow Romancer. The Cape Cod man and the Lon doner were traveling on the same' train together from Liverpool to the capital. "Yes," said the Yankee, Vwe do have consid'rable fog out our way, I've seen it so thick that tbe land ladies of our summer boardin' houses could ladle it out and use It instead o' whipped egg for the heavy part ot the floatin' island." "We 'ave 'em, too, in London," said bis traveling companion, "but : our climate is too dirty to permit of our eatin' it We burn so much soft coal, you see, the fog gets packed full of soot. The only thing we really can do with It is to cut it up into blocks and use it instead ot peat when we want a quick fire." And the Yankee took out the little American flag he wore in his button hole and put it away in his wallet- Judge. FOR THE LADY OR THE AUTO. Expressman I don't know whether this comes here. The address is In distinct. ' Housemaid I guess it's all right it's either- a. new . tire for. the aujo, or a new ,nai ior ute, mfssus: . Uncle Zeb's Preference. Uncle Zebulon was on a visit to his nephew in the big city and the two had gone to a restaurant' for dinner. They had given their order and were waiting for it to be filled when the younger man, who had been glancing at a paper that lay on the table, said: said: "By the way, uncle, did you ever have cerebro-spinal meningitis? "No," replied Uncle Zebulon, after a few moments' mental struggle with the question, "and I don't , want any, I'd ruther haye fried liver - and ..bacon any day." ' Poor Old Bird. Pop (looking up from the paper) I see there's a new baby hippopotamus at the zoo. What are yon laughing at, Johnnie? 1 Johnnie (who is almost as bright as he looks) I was jus' laughin' to think of the stork carryin' a hipperpofr amus! -Exchange. A Home Remedy for Burns. No housekeeper should be without a bottle of olive oil and lime water for burns. A preparation should always be in readiness in case of emergency. (Add lime water to oil until a creamy emulsion is tormed and Dottle, always shakine well before applying. The ef- jtect of this upon burns is wonderful in; jits healing and soothing powers, and lit is equally efficacious for sunburn. Harper'f '3azar. , "Expert" Carving. At a Cinner where half a duck was .served each guest the host was com Ipllmented upon his skilful carving. Later it was divulged that before cooking them the birds were cut inl two, stuffed, sewed together and1 baked. Mr. Host merely cut 1 the threads at the table. To Keep Flues Clear of Soot. Stove pipes, boiler tubes and flues may be kept free of soot, by occasion ally throwing a scrap of zinc into the fire. Crabapple Jelly. Every housewife does not know thftt an ounce of ginger root makes a de licious taste if put into her crabapple liellr. Some cheap grades of sugar Tvill .often turn apple jelly a pinkish color. ' Loaves for Sandwiches. Half fill pound baking powder cans with bread dough; let rise until nearly level. Bake as any bread, and you will find neat, round sliees with no crust, Bultable for sandwiches for luncheos aura serties, picnics, etc. v Gingered Pears. ' 1 This is particularly nice Mired with lee cream or muskmelon. To eight pounds of pears chopped very thin al low four pounds or less of sugar, one cupful ot water, the Juice and this yellow rind of four lemons (be sure they are not bitter), and . one-eighth pound or more of green ginger root scraped and cut in thin slice. Bring the sugar and water to a bfll, add tbe fruit, ginger and lemon, then simmer three-quarters of an hour or until the consistency, of marmalade. Birds Foresaw Storm. A German officer describes in the Rote Kreuz a curious scene he wit nessed on a ride in southwest Africa. A number of vultures, eagles and oth er large birds suddenly gathered on the trees at one place. A few dark clouds were -visible, and ere long there was a violent tropical storm. The wa ter penetrated into holes in the ground, from which presently emerged large numbers of, .snakes, scorpions . and mice, and these the birds pounced upon and devoured. The Ideal School. It you want to make a nation of "bookies" by all means cram the boys and girls In your schools with plenty of arithmetic, bnt if you would rather have a nation of good men and women, then train your children to love all that Is beautiful in nature and in art, all that is noble in life or in death. The school of the future will be a beautiful building in a beautiful garden. Clarion. The Deep Things of Life. The hymn line: "Cast your deadly doing down" was long ago discredited and laughed out of court Neverthe less, one who plM faith,. Jo cease less activities, even' of philanthropy and reform, - who is contemptuous of poetry, philosophy and religion, who forgets to draw from the perennial wells of courage and inspiration, will sooner or later walk in a barren land of petty interests, unable to discover the springs of refreshment Peter Pan in Real Life. The lucky man is the man who ' through all the seasons of many years remains at heart a boy. He will be asked by boys to share boyish amuse ments and to fall in with boys ideas x of what sport should be, which is tbe best compliment of, alL He. has a man's .store.- of experience, an added patience, a maturer philosophy, but in all else he remains a boy. London ' Field. ', Greek Architecture. It is astonishing that students of. Greek literature and Greek thought should .not-be , definitely strained to the -knowledge of Greek architecture. He who knows only the literary expres sion of ancient Greece, great as that Is, knows but one-half of the achieve ments . of "the supreme Caucasia mind." The Builder. The Highest Character. ; The highest: of ' charaet0rftr is; my estimation, is his who is as ready te pardon the moral errors of mankind as if he were every day guilty ot some himself; and at the same . time as cautious of committing a fault as if he never forgave one. Pliny the Younger. 8llk Hat Economy. We may regard London as the home ot the silk hat, and we feel sure that here the free ironing of customers' hats has had a very pernicious effect on the trade. The average silk hat' wearer will buy only one of these hats in a.ye.ar.-Ouifltteri -V ' 1 T v Cultivate Cheerfulness. . Temperament may not be , over come, but it can be modified. The best character that you can take as your! guide is .one absolutely true and al-i ways cheerful. Cheerfulness is one of the first of virtues. Dangerous City "Playgrounds.'' New York city streets make dan gerous playgrounds, but -they are the only ones' that thousands of little peo ple have. Not a day passes without in-; Jury to children by vehicles, and about nine are killed each month. Injurious Infantile Fashion. Out of every 100 recruits in Bos-i nia, 62 have flattened skulls, the out come, apparently, of the very tight dressing of the baby's head ia its first months of life. i The Philippines. Systematic investigation of the Phil-, ippine islands reveals the fact that the group conSjsts' of 2,600 islands, 'while; before the American occupation the number was estimated at 1,200. Work Is the Divine Spur. - -Work is a necessity if you would develop the best that Is in you; it is the divine spur that compels a man to unfold bis possibilities by conquering; the enemies of success and happiness.' Lincoln Directory HERBERT E.GOOCH CO. BROKERS AND DEALERS Grain, Provisions, Stocks,. Cotton nin Office. 304-305 Fraternity Bids. Lincoln, Nebraska. Bell Phono 512 An to Phone 2859 Largest House in Btate GARMENTS SSft O'STEELE 137 So. 11th St., Lincoln, Neb. III LI ROYAL HOTEL I'lan Hotel in Lincoln. Levi D. th & O Streets oniy AmeiTCitu ami & Co.. Frjt.