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About The Wageworker. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1904-???? | View Entire Issue (May 11, 1906)
THE WAGEWORKER By W. M. MAUPIN LINCOLN, NEBRASKA. Bebraska Botes, ' i Waco will have a saloon this season tor the first time in years. William Kerr sold his farm south east of Hastings to John Glannzz tor 15,000. The old Methodist church at Plain view is being torn down and a new edi fice will take its place as soon as pos sible. John RIckett, a grocer In West Beat rice, was severely cut and bruised about the head and body in a runaway accident. Houston Bros, of Tekamah finished hearing their sheep. They got about 17,000 pounds, which they shipped im mediately. The contract has been let for the new Presbyterian church at Loup City. The building will cost $2,500 without furnishings. The Beatrice high school has been admitted to membership in the north central association of colleges and sec ondary schools. Very little grain of last year's crop has been marketed by Saunders county farmers, who. are awaiting better roads and better prices. The Farmers' Elevator company at PIckrell took in 148 wagon loads oi corn at its elevator a few days ago. A record breaker for the season. The work of prospecting for water in the pasture of Frank Salts, north west of Beatrice has ceased, as the wells were pumped dry in a short time. 1 ! rne snermau county gram, coai and live stock' association has incorporated with a capital stock of $100,000. The principal place of business is Loup City. Money to the amount of $500 was collected from citizens and' business men of West Point and forwarded for the relief of the California earthquake ufferers. ! Remonstrances have been filed by the citizens of Pickrell against ..the granting of a druggist's permit to C. A. Smith and a saloon license to Wil liam Brehm. - The Press Publishing company oi Norfolk has filed articles of incorpora tion with Secretary of State Galusha. The company has a paid up capital stock of $4,000. Postmaster Logan of Pqnca was au thorized by the fourth assistant post master general to extend the rural de livery from his office by the establish ment of rural route No. 4. , The Wells-Abbott-Nelman company of Schuyler have Installed a laboratory for the purpose of making all its tests at the mill. The place is furnished with up-to-date cooking utensils. -' The town of Prague has voted bonds for $5,000 to construct a waterworks system. After the election the citizens celebrated the result by the firing of cannon and the discharge of firearms. A number of farmers and feeders are shipping their stock from Leigh. In A consignment of sixteen cars were some of the best cattle that have been shipped from that place for several years. Nine of the Burlington freight cars, which were on a side track east of the Missouri river, opposite Plattsmouth were consumed by fire. The origin of the fire is believed to have been caused by sparks from a passing engine. It is estimated that the loss will exceed the sum of $3,000. Because the Missouri Pacific Rail road company refused to build a side track to the elevator of the Manley Co-operative Grain company's elevator In Manley, County Attorney Rawls in the interest of the company has brought suit in the district court in the name of the state against the company to collect damages for the violation of the law. Buildings are now rapidly going up in the new Great Northern town of Leshara. Two lumber yards, two ele vators, a hardware store and a butcher shop are now operating. A bank has been chartered and will soon be doing business. The postofflce has been es tablished, though owing to the irregu lar train service, as yet mail is brought from Fremont by rural delivery. The work on the dam in the Elkhorn river whfpfi nnpratpfl thft nlnnr rt tho West Point -Milling company is being rapidly done and it is expected that in a few days the mill will start up for business.,. The Beemor State bank of Beemer elected William P. Mangold of Ben nington, Neb., a its new bookkeeper to take the placa of Charles Mean. Mr. Mangold is the son of Hon. Peter Mangold, president of the Bennington Btate bank- STRIKE METTLED HARD COAL OPERATORS AND MINERS REACH AGREEMENT. ILL OLD EMPLOYEES ARE TAKEN BACK No Discrimination Shown in Re-Employment and Award of Strike Commission to Be Continued for Another Three Years' Term. After carrying on negotiations for nearly three months, the sub-committee representing the anthracite mine workers and operators . of eastern Pennsylvania have agreed to continue the award of the strike commission for another three years, or until March 31, 1909, and the men will return to work as soon as practicable. All miners who have not committed violence against persons or property will be re employed, and no one will be dis criminated against because of any ac tivity he may have taken in the strike movement. The agreement is subject to the ratification of the tri-district convention of mine workers at Scran ton, but there is not the slightest doubt that the delegates will approve the action of their representatives. This outcome of a dispute which threatened to develop into a long, bit ter struggle and paralyze a great in dustry, was looked upon with consid erable satisfaction by the coal presi dents, as the agreement entered into is their first proposition made early in March in reply to the mine workers' original demands. The miners had little to say regard ing the agreement, except that it was the best they could get. They pointed out, however, that the, agreement en tered into is the first general agree ment that has ever been signed be tween operators and miners, and they look upon it as a step forward in their endeavor to have regular agreements with their employers. While the compact entered into was predicted last week the agreement was not reached without a final struggle on the part of the miners to get some thing more. President Mitchell, in stating to the operators the action of the Scranton convention asked that the proposed agreement be made for two years. In arguing . for the two year term he said the cost of living might increase considerably in three years, and that other changes in the mining industry might come that would make the present wage scale unfair to the men. The operators in their reply said they felt that any con tingency that might arise was cov ered by the award of the strike com mission, and they concluded by asking that the award be continued for three years. This was then agreed to. In taking up the question of dis crimination against some of the. men, it was the intention of the mine own ers to take back only such men as they choose to re-employ, but Presi dent Mitchell contested this point so strongly that the operators withdrew it. SPECIAL. GRAND JURY SWORN. Summoned in New York to Look Into Political Contributions. The spetial New York City grand jury which is to investigate insurance matters, and especially political cam paign contributions, has been empan nelled. District Attorney Jerome, who asked for this jury, was present with several of his assistants when it was sworn in. Justice Scott, of the crim inal branch of the supreme court, in his charge said: "Your attention will be called to a series of alleged crimes which have occasioned discussion in the public press and in various financial circles. The legislature has passed laws reme dying, so lar as it can, all past mis takes. Your duty is to inquire if any crime has been committed under the law as it stood before the legislative action. You will have the actiye and energetic assistance of the district at torney and you are entitled at all times to call upon him for assistance and advice. You are not to be swayed by suspicion or clamor in any of your work." Three witnesses, all of them em ployes of the Mutual Life Insurance company, were examined by the grand jury immediately after its work be gan. They were William Carpenter, who had charge of the so-called "house of mirth," at Albany; Wallace Bab cock, who issued the orders for sup plies for the Mutual Life, and Harry Epps, chief bookkeeper in the supplies department. THROWN FROM AUTOMOBILE. Manufacturer Badly 'Injured Near White Plains, N. Y. In an automobile accident in Broad way park, near White Plains, N. Y., Glfford Cochran, a carpet manufac turer of Yonkerg, was seriously in jured. The automobile collided with a truck, the horses of which were killed. In Mr. Cochran's party were Joseph Pulitzer, jr., Mrs. Cochran, Miss Sallie D. Dixon and George 'Simp son, the chauffeur. Although the car was completely wrecked and the occu pants thrown out. NOT GOING BACKWARD. ,. -v. . " :;,r.j President Sticks to Original Sand on Rate Regulation. ' ?y J . President Roosevelt has reiterated his views on railroad rate legislation in a telegram sent to the legislative committee of the Pennsylvania state grange.-.1.' The telegram follows; "To W. F.. Hill and Members of Legislative Committee, Pennsylvania State Grange: Telegram received. I am happy to tell you that not only am I standing on niy original position as regards rate legislation, but it. seems likely that congress wiU take is position, too. '- The Hepburn bill, meets my views, as I have from the begin ning stated. The Allison amendment is only declaratory of what the Hep burn bill must mean, supposing it to be constitutional, and no genuine friend of the bill can object to it with out stultifying himself. In addition I should be glad to get certain amend ments such as those commonly known as the Long and Overman amend ments, but .they are not vital, and even without them the Hepburn bill, with the Allison amendment, contains practically what I have both originally and since asked for, and if enacted into law it will represent the, longest step ever yet taken in the direction of solving the railroad rate problem. "THEODORE ROOSEVELT." BOMB FOR DOUBASOFF. Governor General of Moscow Injured Life Saved by Poor Aim. A bomb was thrown at the carriage of Vice Admiral DouDasoff, governor general of Moscow, as he was being driven to the palace. He was wound ed in the foot and his aide-de-camp and a sentry was kilied. The man who threw the bomb is reported to have been killed He wore an officer's uni form. Access to the palace is barred. Governor General Doubasoff was re turning in an open, carriage from the Ushenski cathedral and the outrage took place outside the carriage en trance to his palace. Several by standers were injured. According to the route decided upon in advance, the governor general should have returned to the palace by the side entrance, but during the drive he changed his ;route and thereby ran into the peril he. was seeking to avoid. Vice Admiral Doubasoff s life was saved by the poor aim of his would-be assassin. The bomb exploded on the pavement several paces to the rear of his carriage, hurling the mutilated corpse of the terrorist severaL,yards backward and tearing off one arm and the face of an aide who was descehd ing from the carriage. ; Governor Gen eral Doubasoff was thrown from his carriage and under the horses' heels. His back was burned and his'; leg bruised, -but he was able to walk un assisted into the palace. The coachman's skull was fractured and he was taken to a hospital.. Vice Admiral Doubasoff was appoint ed governor general of Moscow in De cember last. He is also an aide of the emperor and a member of the council of the empire. Several plots against him have been attempted. Immediate ly after he had taken office he incurred the enmity of the revolutionists, who entered into a conspiracy to abduct him, but this failed. CORTELYOU FAVORS CHANGE. Wants Commission to Pass on Second Class Mail Matter. Postmaster General Cortelyou' has recommended to congress the appoint ment of a commission to, inquire into the subject of second class mail mat ter with a view to ascertaining what modifications of the present second class laws are necessary, the commis sion to render its report to congress not later than December 10, 1906. In order that ail interests shall be represented, he has recommended that the commission consist of seven- per sons and be made up as follows: One senator, selected by the president of the senate; one representative, select ed by the speaker of the house; one officer of the postofflce department, selected by the postmaster general; one representative of the publishers of the daily newspapers; one repre sentative of the weekly, semi-weekly and tri-weekly newspapers, and one representative of the publishers of neriodicals and magazines, the last three to.be appointed' by the presi dent oi the United States from among those recommended to him by repre sentative associations or publishers of such newspapers and periodicals, and a seventh member to be selected by the six. An appropriation of $25,000 is asked to defray the cost of the in: vestigation. The postmaster general in his recent annual report recommends to con gress a thorough review of the whole subject of second class mail matter a.nd the enactment of a statute to take the place of those existing which would render unnecessary the consid eration of such questions as those up on which second class matter now de pend. 1 Leaves All to His Family. The late ex-Gcvernor Boyd's will, disposing of an estate estimated at half a million dollars, was filed for probate at Omaha. All life insurance is left to the widow, Anna H. Boyd, to whom is given also the home prop erty during her life. To James E. Boyd, jr., is left $10,000 and to. the daughter, Margaret Boyd, $20,000. Provision having already been made for the other daughter, Mrs. "'Bier bower, she is left only $1,000. All other property, real and personal, is to be appraised and divided equally be tween the widow and three children. HE WENT ON CRUTCHES All Medicines Felled Until Dr. Wil liams' Pink Pills Cured His Rheumatism. " Some years ago." says Mr. W. H. Clark, a printer, living at 612 Buchanan street, Topeka, Eans., "I had a bad at tack of rheumatism and could not seem to get over it. All sorts of medicines failed. to do me any good and my trouble kept getting worse. My feet were so swollen that I could not wear shoes and I had to go on crutches. The pain was terrible. " One day I was setting the type of an article for the paper telling what Dr. Williams' Pink Pills had done for a man afflicted as I was and I was so impressed with it that I determined to give the medicine a trial. For a year my rheu matism had been growing worse, bnt after taking Dr. Williams' Pink Pills I began to improve. The pain and swell ing all disappeared and I cau truthfully say that I haven't felt better in the past twenty years than I do right now. I conld name, off hand, a half-dozen peo ple who have used Dr. Williams' Pink Pills at my suggestion and who have re ceived good results from them." Dr. Williams' Pink Pills are guaran teed to be safe and harmless to the most delicate constitution. They contain no morphine, opiate, narcotic, nor any thing to cause a drug habit. They do not act on the bowels but they actually make new blood and strengthen the nerves. Dr. Williams' Pink Pills cure rheuma tism because they make rich, red blood and no man or woman can have healthy blood aud rheumatism at the same time. They have also enred many cases of anaemia, neuralgia, sciatica, partial pa ralysis, locomotor ataxia and other dis eases that have not yielded to ordinary treatment. - - All druggists sell Dr. Williams' Pink Pills or they will be sent by mail, post paid, on receipt of price, 60 cents per box, six boxes for $2.50, by the Dr. Wil liams Medicine Co., Schenectady, N. Y, Advice of friends makes a multitude of enemies. WORST CASE OF ECZEMA. Spread Rapidly Over Body Limbs and Arms Had to Be Bandaged Marvelous Cure by Cuticura. "My son, who is now : twenty-two years of age," when he was four months old began to have eczema on his face, spreading quite rapidly until he was nearly covered. We had all the doctors around us, and some from larger places, but no one helped him a. particle. The eczema was something terrible, and the doctors said it was the worst case they eve saw. At times his whole body and face were covered, all but his feet. I had to bandage his limbs and arms; his scalp was just dreadful. ' A friend teased me to try Cuticura, and I be gan to use all three of the Cuticura Remedies. He was better in -two months; and in six months he was well. Mrs. R. li Rlsley, Plermont, N. H., Oct., 24, 1905." Strong Calls. ' "How in the world did you get wait ed on with such alacrity?" asked the little man in the rush lunchroom. "I have been here an hour and you just came in two minutes ago. "Don't you see that sign?" respond ed the big man. It reads,-'Call the Waiter.'" - "Y-yes, but I called . him and he didn t pay any attention. "Yes, but what did you call him?" Send to Garfield Tea Co., Brooklyn, N. Y., for free package of Garfield Tea, the herb cure for constipation and liver trouble. Something Like It. Marryat Hello! old man; you're looking prosperous. Munniman So I am. I'm in the leather business now. I tell you, there's nothing like leather Marryat Think so? Say, come up and take dinner with us tonight. My wife's baked some pies for dessert. Which? - Tramp Lady, I am dying from ex posure. Woman Are you tramp, politician or financier? Many a man's phenomenal success is a surprise to himself. EmlneBt Doctors Praise Its Ingredients. We refer to that boon to weak, nervous, suffering women known as Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription. Dr. John Fyfe one of tho Editorial Staff of Tub Eclectic Medical. Review says of Unicorn root (ielonitis Dioica) which is one of the chief ingredients of the "Fa vorite Prescription": ' A remedy which invariably acts as a uter ine invisror.itor makes for normal ac tivity of the entire reproductive system." He continues "in Helonias we have a medica ment' which more fully answers the above purposes than any other drug with which I am acquainted. In the treatment of diseases pe culiar to women it is seldom that a case is seen whieh does not present some indication for this remedial agent." Dr. Fvfe further says: 'The following are anions the leading indications for Helonias (CJnieorn root). Pain or aching in the back, with leucorrhoea; atonic (weak) conditions of the reproductive organs of women, mental depression and ir ritability, associated with chronic diseases of the reproductive organs of women, constant sensation of heat in the region of the kid neys: monorrhagia (flooding), due to a weak ened condition of the reproductive system; smenorruoea (suppressed or absent monthly periods), arising from or accompanying an abnormal condition of the digestive organs and -' ansemio (thin blood) habit; dragging sensations in the extreme lower part of the abdomen." If more or less of the above symptoms are present, no invalid woman can do better than take Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription, one of the leading ingredi ents of which is Unicorn root, or Helonias, and the medical properties of which it most faithfully represents. Of Golden Seal root, another prominent ingredient of "Favorite Prescription." Prof. Finley Ellingwood, M. D., of Ben nett Medical College, Chicago, says : It is an important remedy in disorders of the womb. In all catarrhal conditions and general enfeeblement, it is useful." Prof. John M. Scudder, M. D., late of Cincinnati, says of Golden Seal root : "In relation to its general effects on the system, there is no medicine in use about which there is such general unanimity of opinion. It is universally regarded as the tonic useful in all debUitated states." Prof. Bartholow, M. D., of Jefferson Medical College, says of Golden Seal: "Valuable in uterine hemorrhage, menor rhagia (flooding) and congestive dysmenor rhoea (painful menstruation)." Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription faith fully represents all the above named in gredients and cures the diseases for which they are recommended. JAPANESE ARMY SUTLERS. the Canteen Follows . Closely In the Wake of. the Moving . : - Troops. - One who was with the . Japanese army in Manchuria for six months Says: "Old foreign campaigners .re narked in the field that no army prob ably ever had so many canteens in its wake. When- the army was not marching there was always a canteen or two not far to the rear of every division. When it settled down ' to recuperate after a . battle canteens were quickly established in Manchu houses. " These carried cigarettes, writing paper, postcards, beer,-imitation brandy, imitation whi3ky, imita tion port, imitation sherry, sake and sometimes Manila cigars. "Japanese are keen traders. Not 200 feet back of the Nanshan battery one day in the seven-day battle of the Shaho there was a Japanese- peddler selling cigarettes, Chinese sweetcakes, rice and beer to the reserves. During the same battle . the canteens . were never more than three miles back.ot the front line of. trenches. As the Japanese soldier's pay is only $1.36 a month and the army sav ing banks had, considering that, phenomenal deposits, there was-' not much spending money in the army. A bottle of beer cost ten cents and a packet of cigarettes about three cents. J "Whenever there was a triing bat tle the commander-in-chief would or der sake distributed as a ration. On the mikado's birthday a year ago one extra double packet of cigarettes was distributed to each man in the field. This cost the emperor more than $15, 000. Otherwise when the distribution was possible ten cigarettes a day went with the regular ration. "One day in an American periodical received at camp there was a solemn poem celebrating the abstinence of the Japanese from drink. "This caused concern among the Japanese officers, who disliked the emphasis laid upon the difference be tween their- army -. and a European army and the commissary general told the foreign observers: ' '"Our soldiers like drink as well as any other soldiers. Sometimes they need it. when they cannot get it and we send it to them in the trenches.' As a matter of fact, though the peas ant at home has a hard enough time to supply himself with food, he is. not more averse than other ; people to strong liquor once he learns the taste of it. Many a man will go home from the campaign with tastes he never had beforev The manufacture of beer is still a young industry in Japan, but from the time the process was import ed it has grown to enormous propor tions. Headquarters, even battalion headquarters in underground bomb proof trenches, were always supplied with beer or sweet wine. Marshal Oyama liked sweet champagne. The strategist of the war, Gen. Kodema, drank claret with every meal." INCIDENTAL INSOMNIA. Bleep May Be Wooed by Taking a Series of Beep Inspir ations. It commonly happens that persons otherwise apparently in good health find a difficulty in sleeping without a break, their night's rest being inter rupted by turns of wakefulness; after falling asleep for an hour or two they awaken a modified or . incidental in somnia takes the' place of normal re pose, says a correspondent of the Lon don Lancet. I believe, and I suggest, that this may be due to a disturbance of the equilibrium of the cerebral cir culation. Tbe cause of the disturbance may be various. I do not propose to enter into the question of cause, but have in many- instances successfully counteracted the result by forced in spiratory movements by assisting and encouraging the return flow of blood to the heart; by a rapid and thorough ex pansion of the chest cavity, by the vacuity produced, the blood in the great veins of the neck and upper thor ax is sucked in and hastened on to it? ultimate destination. The large serrati muscles (costo scapulares) are more especially called on for this duty. . The- serratus, by its hindermost attchment to the pos terior border of the scapula, as a muscle of "extraordinary" inspiration, requires for its action in this ca pacity that, the scapula should be steadily and firmly held to the spine by the muscles allocated to this end in other words, by the shoulders be ing vigorously held- backward. The deep breathing thus carried out .for 8, . 12 or 15 inspirations usually suf fices to induce the wished for somno lence. Anyway, it is an experiment easily tried and without risk. The influence of respiratory move ments is demonstrated by the effect of a prolonged and forced expiratory ac tion. The impediment to the return flow of blood is easily to be observed when a vocalist with an uncovered neck is singing a long-sustained high note; the external jugular veins will be seen in their course across the sterno-mastoid muscle in a state of extreme distension, accompanied by congestion of the veins of the head and face, indicating hindrance to the blood current toward the heart. Dwindling Republic. -San Marino, the smallest republic in the world, will soon be without voters if its rate of emigration keeps up. It has only 1,700, including Widows, but it is still a good republic. Recently its assembly decided to abolish the executive council, the members of which have, been elected for : life. Wereafter members will be elected for three years only. . The Stinging Tree.' The stinging tree of Australia some what resembles a gigantic nettle. It has an unpleasant odor, and the natives an dnatlve animals .are , careful to avoid it, .! When a man Is stung by the tree or,' to. put it more prosaically, pricked by the tree's thorn the little wound gives him at first no pain whatever. But in a few minutes a maddening pain is set up; the victim shrieks and rolls upon , the ground; for months afterwards, wihen water touches the stung part, great agony ensues. - Dogs, when- stung, rush about with piteous whines, biting pieces, of flesh from the place that has- been stung. AN E VERY-DAY STRUGGLE. Men and Women of Every Occupation -;" Suffer Miseries from Kidney ',. Complaint J. C,; tilghtner, 703 So. i Cedar St. Abilene, Kansas, is one of the thou- sands i who - suffer from kidney trou bles brought on by daily work. "I first noticed ' it -eight or ten years ago," said Mr. Lightner. "The. dull ' pain- - in thej back fairly made me sick. It was ' hard .to ..get. up or, down, hard to straighten, hard to do any . work that brought a strain on the back, I had frequent attacks of gravel and the urine was passed too often and with pain. ' When I used Doan's . 'Kidney Pills, however, all traces of the trouble-disappeared and have not return ed. I am certainly grateful." Sold by all dealers. 50 cents a box, Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y. v Money may make the mare go, but it isn't always capable of starting a mule or an automobile. Struck by Lightning". Mrs. Nancy Cleary, of Brewers, TIJ C, suffered as if struck by lightning. She says: "I was almost paralyzed from my waist down, and my bacic hurt me constantly, from female trou bles. . I shad headache, seemed always tired, and felt as if I was dying. I took Wine of Cardui, which cured me, and now I feel like a new person." Cardui relieves periodic-'! pain, and makes sick women well. $1.10 at drug stores. There will be money enough in the world for everybody when it is no us to anybody. ; $100 Reward, $100. The readers of this paper will be pleased to learl that there ! at least one dreaded disease that sclenct has been able to cure la all Its stages, and that 11 Catarrh. Hall's Catarrh Cure is the only posltfvt cure now known to the medical fraternity. Catarrk being a constitutional disease, requires a constjtu. (tonal treatment. Hall's Catarrh Cure is takes in ternally, acting directly upon tbe blood and mucoui surfaces ef the system, thereby destroying tn foundation of the disease, and string the patient strength by building up tbe conEtltutlon and assist tag nature in doing Its work. Tbe proptletora bars, so much faith In Its curative powers that they offet One Hundred Dollars for any case that It falls W cure. Send for list of testlmonlals.- Address F. J. CHENEY CO., Toledo, O. Sold by all Druggists, 7So. . Tate Hall's Family Pills for constipation. Charles Lamb and Tobacco. Charles Lamb, according to his own confession, was "a fierce smoker of tobacco." One day when puffing vig orously on the coarsest weed 'from a long clap pipe in company with Dr. Parr the latter asked him how he man aged to acquire this "prodigious pow er." "By toiling after it, as some men toil after virtue," was the prompt re ply. As he advanced in years, how ever, "Ella" was obliged to . relax his intimacy with the weed, so that, to use his own words, he was "like a burnt out volcano emitting now and then only a casual puff." Eventually he took his formal leave in a "Farewell Ode to Tobacco," and in forwarding a copy of the poem to Wordsworth he writes, "I have had it in my head to do it these two years, but tobacco stood in Its own ight when it gave me head aches that prevented me singing its praises." Collecting a Bill. A claim was once placed In tbe hands of Judge Peters of Bangor, Me., for collection. A notice was sent to the debtor, who called and promised to pay the following Saturday. The Judge said: . "Now, don't say you will pay Saturday night unless you mean to. Just take a few more days and be sure. Say you will pay next Wednesday." "All right," said the man; "if I live until next Wednesday I will pay that bill.' Wednesday came,- but no man appeared to settle the bill; whereupon the judge wrote out a notice of the death of the man and put it in the daily paper. . The next day the - bill was settled.-'1 ; Barking Up the Wrong Tree. (: "I have a confession to make, sir."' In the private office of the man-of af fairs, the suitor for the hand pf. his daughter stood, hat in hand.' "Well, sir, what is it?" "Before marrying your daughter, I feel, that I should make a clean breast of my failings. The fact is, I am ex tremely dissipated. I play the races, play poker, play faro, dabble in stocks, smoke, drlnk.and raise the devil gen erally when I happen to feel like it' The man he addressed was thought ful for some time, but he spoke at -last. "Young man,," he said, "I appreciate jour candor in coming to me, but you know things are different from what they used to be. Girls do as they naoa Vnn'vo nnm a r tho wrnns" TWr- son. Does my daughter know of this?" "Does she!" exclaimed the suitor, earnestly. "Why, my dear sir, that's why she wants to marry me." : '"'..' Strong Calls. - "How in the world did you get wait ed on with such alacrity?" asked the little man in the rush lunchroom. "I have been here an hour and you just came in two minutes ago." . "Don't you see that sign?" respond ed the big man. "It reads, 'Call the Waiter.'" " Y-yes,' but I called him and he didn't pay any attention:" "Yes, but what did you call him?" J0 jk