4,Broom Handle*’
Name ol Newest
Club in Paris
To Be Member, \\ onian Must
Be 5 Feet, 5 Inches Tall
and Weigh Not Over
130 Pounds.
Taiis, March 17.—Fat men may he
popular, but the fat lady is always
awkward, especially in Ihose days of
straight, slinky clothes.
Tho Broom Handle club" is Paris’
latest way of showing its approval
of the lean lady. Two conditions are
absolutely necessary in order for a
young woman to join this club—one
must measure at least 5 feet. 5 inches
in stocking feet and weigh not on
ounce over 130 pounds.
The “Broom Handles” in Paris
number about 30 and for the most
part are young and pretty. Very few
of them are married, for it appears
that when ' Broom Handles" are mai>
lied they soon lose their slim lines
and are compelled to resign from the
club. One year of married life changes
the 130 pounds to 140.
"Broom Handles" are much more
popular than their sisters, the "pctil
pots." tho fat. chubby creatures who
are so difficult to clothe in the mod
( rn dress. Fashion designers pick all
their mannequins from the "Broom
Handles," for they know they will
bring them the biggest sales.
ADVERTISEMENT.
ISLANDS MADE ACTIVE
BY A NEW DISCEVERY
Chemist* Find a Substance Which
Renews Vigor by Effect on
Nerves and Secretions.
A discovery made recently by medical
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millions. It is a substance which «uickly
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activity of the nerves and gland* on which
vital force depends. Its effect is so prompt
that a few grains of it produce h visible
improvement. Thousand* who have tried
it tell of delightful results in 24 to 4S
hours, many reporting a full restoration
of physical powers within a week.
The discovery has what scientists call
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on important nerve center*, gland® and
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and the increased glandular activity soon
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and animation, manifested in sparkling
ryes, buoyant step and an eagerness and
increased capacity for the duties of life.
The effects are virtually the same in both
old and young. Men past. 410 say the dis
covery has given them the vigor of the
prime of life.
In the research department of the Mel
ton laboratories, the substance has been
made available for home treatment by
combining it, in tablet form with other
invigorating ingredients. The result, known
as korex compound, is a double-strength
product, containing no harmful drug*,
which users pronounce the most powerful
and delightful vitalixer known. In fact,
it® success has been so great that the
distributors invite any person needing it
to take a double-strength treatment with
the understanding that it cost® nothing if
it fails.
If you wish td try this amazing in
vigorator, write confidentially to the
Melton Laboratories. 340 Massachusetts
Hldg., Kansan City. Mo., and the treatment
will he mailed to you in a plain, sealed
package. You may enclose S2. or simply
send your name, without money, and pay
S2 and postage on delivery. In either case,
if you report "no result ’ aftc • one week.
♦ he laboratories will refund your money.
These laboratories are thoroughly reliable,
«o nobody need hesitate to accept their
guaranteed offer.
advertisement.
I
BACKACHE ■
, Kidneys cause bad.ache? No' Lis
ten! Your backache is caused by
lumbago, sciatica, or a strain and the
quickest relief is soothing, penetrat
ing St. Jacobs Oil. Hub it right on
your painful back, and Instantly the
soreness, stiffness and lnmeness dis
appears. Don't stay crippled! (let a
small trial bottle of St. Jacobs Oil
from your druggist and limber up. A
moment after it Is applied you'll won
der what became of the backache or
lumbago pain.
Rub old, honest St. Jacobs Oil
whenever you have sciatica, neural
gia. rheumatism or sprains, as It Is
absolutely harmless and doesn't burn
the skin.
Memoirs of a Certain W. Hohenzollern,
as They Should Have Been Done
____——-By STEPHEN LEACOCK--—
WHEN I was still only merely ss !
yet up to then prince of Prussia 1
t used to look up to Prince Bis
marck, our great chancellor, and
wonder how long It would take me
to fire hint if I got the chance.
Bismarck was my Idol as ho was
the Idol of us all and none of ua can
ever forget I he service that he ren- j
ilered to the empire. But at the same
time I have to admit that everything 1
he did was a mistake and that In point j
of brain power, big as lie was, he w-as J
a nut. Being a nut, however, does not
for a moment lessen the fact that he !
was one of the heroic figures of Ger
many. I want to make myself per
fectly clear on this point. Bismarck
was twhat is called in America a great
big boob, but at the same time he was
a revered Idol, the paladin of my
grandfather and a nut. If anybody
can'l understand this, I am sorry. I’ve
said it as plainly as I can.
Perhaps I can make my meaning a
little easier to get if I explain that a
sovereign after all is only flesh and
blood. People may not believe this,
but it is true. Speaking therefore as
a sovereign 1 would say that Prince
Bismarck performed great services to
the German empire; but speaking as
flesh and blood I should say that he
didn't.
I will mention here only a row or
the great chancellor's mistakes and
short-comings, but there was lots of
others. In the first place he never
understixkl the Kulturkamp and didn't
really know what it wrs about. I
remember my grandfather the rever
end old emperor in one of those bursts
of indignation, which marked him,
saying. “Bismarck, why don't you
stop this Kulturkamp"" “Because."
said the great chancellor, “I don't
know what it is about." My grand
father felt, and we all felt, that, he
should have known and should have
; stopped it, but in spite of that, wc
all loved and revered the man.
Colossal Ignorance.
Another group of things that the
huge chancellor, enormous though he
was at times, didn't know anything
about was ships, colonies and the
: English.
i 1 can recall a striking instance of
thin. After we began to build big
steel ships in Germany Herr Ballin,
the great shipowner, took Prince Bis j
marck and me (I mean me and Prince
Bismarck) to see Hamburg harbor.
The iron chancellor looked about lilm
| with deep reflection in his hugs eye*
and presently said, “This harbor isn't
a bit like it used to be." After that
lie mournfully turned Ilia huge feet
away from the dock, his vast head
sunk in thought.
Another great mistake that Bis
marck made was at the congress of
Berlin In 1878. At that time, as every
body remembers, the. Russians were
just about to take Constantinople
after their successful campaign
against the Turks. The congress of
Berlin stopped it all. 1 said to Prince
| Bismarck afterwards that the thing
] would have been to have let the Rus
sians take Constantinople then the
English would at once have attacked
them with their giavy and we couM
i have had a general European war
without having to wait for It until
] 1914. Bismarck's mind was so limited
that ho didn't see it. But in spite of
this he is a heroic figure. If he Is
j not my idol now, it is because he <
broke himself to bits with heavy
| blows. This sounds difficult, but he
! did it.
In spite of all 'hat I have Raid it
I must be remembered that while I was
still yet only prince of Prussia, Bis
i march and I (or rather I nnd Bis
m.irck) were on excellent terms. Not
only did he instruct me In all the In
tricate details of the foreign office, a
thing which I learned in one morning.
! but he even sent me out on delicate
and important missions.
One of the first of these whs a mis
; sion to 8t. Petersburg to Convey to
' my cousin Nicholas, the son of the
mar, the order of the Black Injck
After giving the Black Duck to
Nicholas, who was delighted with It,
I made a special report to Prince
1 lb marck and to the old emperor. In
this report, which was absolutely
seers t. I informed them that, without
their knowing it, the relations be
tween Russia and Prussia had cooled.
For nearly 10 years. In fact, ever
since the congress of Berlin, relations
had been cooling and they had never
noticed it but observed it at once
I in two days and a half. How I knew
it really was that 1 got the informa
| tlon from an old Russian general, a
; man of the old school, whom I met
jat a review at Brest l.itovsk.
1 said to him. "What 1* wrong with
■
01
'
SAY “BAYER” when you buy. Insist!
Unless you see the “Bayer Cross” on tablets, you are
not getting the genuine Bayer product prescribed by
physicians over 23 years and proved safe by millions for
Colds
Toothache
Neuritis
Neuralgia
Headache
Rheumatism
Lumbago
Pain, Pain
Accept only “Raver” package which contains proper directions.
Handy “Bayer" hoar* of 12 tablet* Also bottle* of 24 Ifld 100—Prugglit*.
Aipirin k (Ui. trad, uuk at Butt UM.lMtara at Uiwrac.Uc.cM>«l«r .t ■•U.fUfMM
%
you Russians, anyway?" He answered
(he was a man of the old school)
‘‘Oh, e’est re demdam traite de Rer
un." 1 should explain that In these
missions we used French because we
couldn’t trust one another In our
own languages.
Another thing that the chancellor
failed to understand was the English
people and their peculiar psychology.
The English are a noble race, but if
you want anything to reach their in
telligence it is necessary to say it with
great rudeness and brutality. On ac
count of the high character of the
English, brutality is the only thing
that they understand, in other words,
while in every respect a gr<at people,
they are a bunch of hogs.
I had long seen that in building
ships the English intended to use
them for getting across the water.
This design, hidden by a hundred
as German emperor I proposed to
j have a big time all tha time. I re
minded her very firmly that while as
grandmother of her grandson she was
fully entitled to write letters to the
! son of her daughter's husband, she
1 must remember that an emperor I
| could not regard them as coming from
the queen and that In reading them
I it was not 1 hut the emperor who read
them. I would, if she desired, read
j them aloud to myself, but I doubt
| whether in such a case I should ho
i willing to listen to them. 1 am not
sure, whether the queen, who was
growing old, quite got the idea, hut
at any rate after this she behaved
I herself quite properly. The point is,
' however, that Bismarck was furious
| over this correspondence, which
'showed him for the first time that I
I could write letters as well as heeould.
From what 1 have already said, it
cloaks, was not si en by the great
chancellor. His Idea was that the
ships were meant to stay on the water
' an£ not come across.
Hence he could not share my joy at
our acquisition of Poiioland, w liich
gave us somewhere for the German
fchips to go. In short. the Kngllsh
psychology misled him. I remember
that when we were holding our dis
cussions on the naval bill, Bismark
said In the reichstag. "If the Knglish
should land upon our soil I should
have them arrested." The idea was so
deep that I didn't get it, hut I am
sure that events have proved it wrong.
I I am quite sure that my grand
father. the good old emperor, felt just
the same way about Bismarck as 1
did.’ I recall In proof of this a remark
that my grandfather made to Gen
eral Abdoodel, his chief of cabinet.
Abdoodel found my grandfather one
day walking up and down in such
great excitement that he was afraid
his brain wouldn’t stand it and might
| blow out a cylinder. "What Is It?" he
asked. "Bismarck!" answered the old
emperor. "Dismiss him." said Ab
doodel. "I can't." said my grand
1 father. "Bismarck knows how to
1 juggle with Are balls and keep two
in the air and the rest of us can only
do three."
Anecdotes, such a« this, show first,
the complexity of Kuropcan politics;
and secondly, the gratitude of my
family to the great chancellor. It was
I felt that no one could fill his huge
! boots.
Hater on when Prince Bismarck
'came to write his memoirs, he under
I took to slate me In the third volume,
i But it must not be thought that I
bear him the slightest grudge for this.
I On the contrary I respect him for It.
We writers of memoirs must slate
somebody or else the memoirs would
be no good. In proof of my feelings
on this point I may adduce the fact
that the third volume of Bismarck's
memoirs could not have been pub
lished at all without my permission.
Indeed. I wouldn't have given it only
for the fact that somebody hail gone
and published the volume without
Waiting for It. Still It shows a large
ness of mind on my part.
Another way in which Bismarck
fell down— indeed he did little else
than fall down though he was a huge
figure and we all revered him—was
in not understanding my delicate rela
tions with my own family. I may cite
here the fact that my accession to the
throne brought me Into sharp con
flict with Queen Victoria, which made
it neccessary for me to put her In
her place.
The queen, of course. was my
grandmother, and I quite admitted
at the time and admit still that this
was a wonderful thing to he. When
I ascended the throne I proposed to
myself to take a little jaunt over to
Russia, see the Romanoffs and make
a few secret treaties dividing up the
Turks and giving the Albanians to
the younger sister of the king of
Greece and that sort of thing.
Queenle, How Could \nu?
When Queen Victoria heard of libs
she wrote to me to say that in Inr
opinion the best thing 1 could <1" af
ter my accession would lie to go Into
mourning over m>»elf for a year.
I wrote hack and told her that
Willie as her grandson I was willing
to go Into mourning and May there.
Pulls Cun on Coal Man
ami Pays Fine of $.'>0
Eoston. March 17. John II D’Kst*.
40, of No. 151 Manley street. East
Boston, used a new system In trying
to obtain coal.
He threatened Beginnhl Johnson of
No. 354 Wlnthrop street. Wlnthrop.
with a loaded revolver when the lat
ter refused to honor a doctor s pre
scription for coal at the M mi it hu <■ tts
Wharf coal yard, East Boston
DKsts was fined $50 In the East
Boston court for the threat.
Pastor Saya Divine’s Job
Is Not to Call on Women
Defiance, CX March 17.— "The bust
ness of Hie present-day clergyman Is
not so much to <all on women in the
afternoon as to set into operation
such movements ns will linn* shout
right thinking and will correct the
wrong In social, business. Industrial
and governmental resttionsblpi dc
flared Rr\V W 111 lie in A. It* s. new
pastor of the Inc i! I*i* div Iniiiii
■ hurch, addressing the Eschungv club.
is clear that very soon after my as
cension 1 found it necessary to get rid
of Prince Blaniarrk. I had appointed,
after 1 came to the throne, a few
high officials of my own choosing,
such as Count Booh von Boobenstein,
Secret Counsellor Flach von Gestern
and others. These were men of our
true German etamp. straight, up and
down. slab-headed, double-chested
Prussians, absolutely incapable of flat
tery or subservience.
They all said to me. "Majesty, why
not dismiss Bismarck and yourself
govern Germany? You are the wisest,
biggest man among us and you ought
to dismiss him."
I hesitated. "After all." I said.
"Bl«marck Is a great heroic figure—
Fisch ion Gestern poked me (rever
ently) in the ribs, "Cut it out,' he said.
The matter, however, soon came to
a head at a meeting of the state coun
cil. This body, as my reader may
know, is supposed always to proceed
strictly by vote, so that what the ma
jority wish Is done. Judge of my sur
prise whpn I called the council to
gether to vote on a matter In which 1
differed from the chancellor to find
them all voting with Bismarck and
against me. 1 was the only one who
voted for myself, a fact with showed
that the state council was In bad
shape. There was nothing for it but
to request Prince Bismarck to let me
h.i\e his resignation. After that the
i-ouncil regained its liberty and voted
just a* I told It.
I explained the whole matter to my
cousin and brother Nicholas when 1
tan over to Russia a little later to
hold maneuvers and arrange about
dividing up England between Turkey
and Bulgaria. And he at once ep
proved what I had done. "Je com
prends parfaitement,” he said, "ta
ligne d'action." I have heard since
that tills Is not ewfully good French,
hut at any rate Nicholas was trying
to say, "I understand your line of
action." and that was as near as he
could come to It. I was now there
fore safely established on tile throne,
w.th the upproval of my grandmother
lt d of Nicholas nre. to the Intense Joy
of the- German p pie.
(Cop>, shr. nil)
The Omaha Bee
Information Bureau
Through our Washington Information Bureau The Omaha Bee will
answer tlireot to (ho reader any question of faet, with the exception of
medical, legal, love and marriage subjects, or any subject requiring ex
tended research.
Simply write your question as plainly and briefly as possible and
mail to The Omaha Hoe Information Bureau, 4035 New Hampshire avenue,
Washington, I). C\, enclosing a 2-cent stamped, addressed envelope for
reply. He sure to write your name and address plainly on the return en
velope.
Biscuit Recipes
These biscuit recipes have been
worked out and tested in the labora
tories of the Federal States Rela
tions service and in private homes b"
home demonstration agents of the
United States Department of Agri
culture. They Include recipes for the
following; Plain linking powder, bis
cuits, drop biscuits, sour milk bis
cuits, whole wheat biscuits, jieanut
biscuits, peanut butter biscuits, po
tato biscuits and corn meal biscuits.
A copy ,of these recipes will be sent
to any leader of The Omaha Dee n
receipt of a stamped, addressed en
velope and the following coupon.
Tightening Loose Nalls.
Q. Is there any satisfactory way to
tighten nails and screws in a wall
when they have broken out some of
the plaster?
A. Yes. Saturate a bit of wadding
with thick dextrin or glue; wrap a
hit of it around the screw or nail and
insert some of the wadding in the
hole. Reinsert the nail or screw Into
the hole pressing it home as far as
possible. If some of the plaster is
broken out. touch it with the glue
ami put it back into place.
Value of a Yen.
Q What is the value of a Japanese
yen ?
A. A metalic Japanese yen is
worth 49.85 cents, according to a
statement issued by the Treasury de
partment.
Government r.*i>enses.
Q. When did this government have
its heaviest expenses?
A. During 1919. The total ex -
penses of the United States govern
ment during that year were 918,952,
141,180.
Itutlding anil I .nan Assnriatinns.
Q. Hov.’ many building and loan
associations are there tn the Unite.)
States?
A. On June 30. 1932, when the last
tabulation »aa made. there were
9,255 building and loan ssBoristions
in the United States.
First tire President.
Q, Who was the first vire president
pf the United States?
A. John Adams.
IIITtKTISEJIIST,
“Gets-lt”
I Tames the
Wildest
Corns
You Can Peel Them Right Off
No matter how !onf you’ve had your cnrrn,
how lead they may be. whether hard or to/t, or
whit you have tried, believe this—"Gets It"
will end corn paint at once, and quickly you
can lift the corn right «»rf the toe or foot, with
the finger* 11 eml* callouses, the same simple
wav Millions u*e it Money guarantee
Costs but a tr.ftr-everywhere K Lawrence
A Co., Mfr .# Chicago.
ai>vm^i iNfMr.M %uvmrh> *r.\T.
"
Clean Your Bowels! Stop Sick Headache, Dizziness,
Colds, Sour Stomach, Gases, Bad Breath
Clean your bowel*—then feel fine!
Enjoy the nicest, gentlest bowed
cleansing you put experienced by
taking one or two candy llke Casein
it i tonight. They physic your bowel*
fully. All the constipated waste and
sour bile will move out of the bowels
without grilling or stirring you up.
There will he no bowel poison to ran*c
colile. nil k headache, dizziness. hll
lotisncsa or Biiur stomach when you
wake up in the mnrnlnit. Mom men.
women .and children take C* sea rets
for the liver ami bowels than nil oth
er InxutIve cathartics combined. Ten
cent boxes, nlso 25 nnd 50 cent sizes
Any illUK sloie
Al>t r.HTIHEMENT. %n' ► HTI«r.*EST.
STOMACH UPSET-GAS, GAS!
END INDIGESTION AT ONCE
*
Chew a Few Pleasant Tablets! Instant Stomach Relief!
(‘h**\v n frw ! Mlonmt h Hut*!
Thu moment * I 'inpr linin'
iwuclii * th« atoinai li you never have
pm mini Ini11*p*ilti'ii I'iiIii or Rim
llntulripr, htmlbutn, pnlpliiillon u*
i
drill Motion li.
t’orrwi your UlHorilrinl tllf-Mlmt fur
n f»w omit* Millions of stomach suf
f**i*'i s tin vo found rrtief In lh#*«» }tlsss<
*nt, hai ml« as labials. Any drug alurc.
The Omaha Bee Informal ion U j
reau,
4n3i Now Hampshire Avenue,
Washington, D. C.
Gentlemen:
Kindly send me a copy "f the
biscuit recipes which you have ob
tained. A stumped, addressed en
velope is enclosed.
Name .
Address . . .
City and State ..
Removing Mildew.
Q. What will remove mildew from
cotton cloth?
A. If the mildew is fresh, use cold
water; otherwise try to bleach with
Javelle water or potassium perman
ganate.
Disappearance of Cyclons.
Q. When did the U. 8. 8. Cyclops
disappear? Has she ever been heard
from?
A. The C> clops disappeared June
14, 1918. The Nbvy department
claims she has never been heard
from.
Mize of Leviathan.
y. Can you tell me the size of the
steamer leviathan which is now be
ing rebuilt for passenger service?
A. The Leviathan is 907 feet long
and has a breadth of 100 feet. She j
ADVE1T18EMENT.
BE PRETTY! TURN
and
Try Grandmother’s Old Fa*!
vorite Recipe of Sate
Tea and Sulphur.
Almost everyone know* th.it Sago
Tea and Sulphur properly compound
ed, brings back the natural color and
lu*tre to the hair when streaked
or gray. Years ago the only way f
get this mixture was to make It at
home, which is mussy and trouble
some. Nowadays, by asking at any
dt ug store for Wyeth'S Sage and Sul
phur Compound,'' you will get a large
bottle ot this famous old recipe, im
proved by the addition of other in
gredients. at a small cost.
Don't stay gray! Try It! No one |
can possibly tell that you darkened j
your hair, as it does it so naturally ■
and evenly. You dampen a sponge or i
•oft brush with it and draw thi*
through your hair, taking one small !
strand at a time; by morning the gray j
hair disappears, and after another ap
plication or two your hair becomes j
beautifully dark, glossy and attractive
has a registered tonnage of 54,2«2
ton* and Is the second largest 'era 1
afloat, being only eight loot shorter
than the Majestic. Tl»- v< s'*! ««
formerly the North german Llov.1
liner Vaterland.
Distance to Colon.
Q. How far is it from New Vork
to Colon, Panama?
A. One thousand nine hundred and
eighty-one miles
Highest Dam in the World.
Q. What is the highest dam in the
world?
A. The Arrow rock dam built by
the United Stales government for Ir
rigation purposes in the Boise river
in Idaho. It is 349 feet high.
One of the latest tools serves either
as a shovel or hoe, depending upon
which wa" it is inclined from Its han
'»«• ‘ ___
Man Fail* to F.at Four
Pound* of Meat; Fined
Detroit March 17.—The Inability
of .Stove Dozore* to sustain his assert
ed reputation as a tr»ncherman cod
him $27.
Steve was arrested on a charge of
disturbing the peace preferred by his
sweet heart, Sophia Wilcsyitskl. at
whose home he rooms and boards.
He had beaten Sophia with a stick,
Steve explained to the judge, became
she filled to provide his usual evening
meal ration of four pounds of meat.
The court questioned Steve's capacity
80 an officer accompanied Steve to
a nearby restaurant, where he w s
given a chance to "make good." The
officer reported Steve consumed
"only'’ 1.5 pounds of veal, eight larre
bologna sandwiches and one quart
of milk.
akvkbtmkmknt.
ADVUBTISKMfAT.
Beautiful Hair in a Moment
Girts! Try This! Hair Instantly Appears Abundant, Soft,
Lustrous and Colorful—A Gleamy Mass!
35 Cent “Danderine" Also Ends Dandruff; Falling Hair!
Immediately:—your hair becomes
beautiful. Just moiaten a cloth with
Itanderine and draw it carefully
through your hair, taking or.* small
atrand at a time; thts will cleanse
the hair of dust, dirt or arty excessive
oil—in a few minutes you will he
amazed. Tour hair will l»e wavy, fluf
fy and possess an Incomparable soft
ness. luster and really appear twice
as thick and abundant—a mass of
luxuriant, glinty, colorful hair.
Besides beautifying the hair I>an
dertne eradicates dandruff; Invigor
afe« the scalp, stopping Itching arc!
falling h r.
Danderme 1* the be*!, cheapest
and most delightful hair correct.te
and tor_ It i* t the hair what fresh
showers of rain are to vegetation.
It goes rieht to the roots, vital;*,«
and strengthens them. Its stimulating
properties help the hair to grew long,
heavy, strong
You caa surely have beautiful ha r,
and lots of It. if you will spend S3
cents for a bottle of Dunderine at any
drug store or toilet counter I* is not
greasy oily or sticky.
( 8££
"WANT”
rf ADS fill
J
This or This
When you hang out a sign When you put vour “For
to let the public know your Rent" advertisement in the
room, apartment or house "Want” Ad columns of The
is for rent, perhaps a hun- ^
died people'will see it. ^ "mfha 3™ Wl r™>
^^B ically every prospective
Most of them will be youi tenant in Omaha about
neighbors* They will have hp what you have to rent,
their own homes, and few w
of them will be interested. .. , . .
Every person who looks to
You MAY rent your place Omaha Bee "\\ ant Ads
this way but it will be in will be interested or he
spite of your method of ad- would not be looking there,
vertising.
rpi* , i .. , Out of this large volume of
l his way takes time and ?
patience. In addition, you interested readers you will
are losing money every day ‘iavp no trouble getting
that your room, apartment good tenants for your
or house is vacant. house, apartment or rooms.
Read and V$e Omaha Bee "Want'’ Ads
The Bee-Line to Result»
\
THE EVENING BEE