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RED CLOUD, NEBRASKA. CHIEF
MWWIMWWW II
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Matrimonial Adventures
The Pie and
The Past
BY
Joseph C. Lincoln
Author of "TVJr Harbor," "On
liinlul tho .M.imilllrrnt." "fnp'n
1U-I," "I'y Whlluhrr'H I'liwr,"
"Knt Know lr h," "('ni'n Dun's
Diiiurlitrr," "(itinlmux," "The
rortygeo," "abut lugs," etc.
Coryrlsht by United Feature Syndicate
p
JOSEPH C. LINCOLN,
AMERICAN HUMORIST
It was some yrars ngo tli.it I
first saw Joseph C. Lincoln. I tllct
not meet him then, because, at tliat
t tmo I was "Hiimli fry" on ono of
tlic leading magazines and huU the
plensuro only of catching glimpses
(if the lil? authors who cam: to
pro thu fiction editor. Mr. Lincoln
wasn't quite so big then na ho Is
now. but thu direction In which ho
was bended was tnoro than evident.
Joseph C. Lincoln was born on
Cnpo Cod and started his career
at an early ai;e as an aitlnt. but
shortly dlsi'overod that Ids talents
lay In the direction of writing.
Among his first writings are his
tainoiiH "Capo Cod ilullads." They
not only were a success whon they
appeared, but tho book has Rained
In popularity enormously through
cut tho years. lie has t-'old stories,
yl.ort and long, to all the promt
in nt magazines In tho country, and
he Iiiim reached a very special place
In the hearts of his adtuliors. lie
lias tho faculty not only of enter
taining his readers, of putting the
luuch In the kind place, but for
ubtle understanding of human na
ture nnd of people. It Is this qual
ity that makes tiltu Just plain "Joe
Llnioln" to hundreds of thousands
of his enthusiastic American
friends.
MAUV SJT i:VAr.T CUTTING. Jit.
i
?
A
t
t
$,
.Mrs. Lurella Kills took tluv cran
berry plo from thu oven nnd set It on
the bark of tho stove. It was a suc
tossful pie, If Miu Mtlil It as shouldn't;
I'l-ji. (laky brown crust; crimson, Juicy
Ailing; a very good plo indeed. Hut,
good as It was, It was not too good for
Obed. Nothing was too good for a
Jwluuid like Obed Kills.
They had been niarrlcd n month.
She hail come from (.'ape Ann to Cape
foil to act as housekeeper and com
panion for old Mrs. Halley nt Truniet.
On the first of September she hail
taken a day's holiday and, In common
with nt least one-half of Truinet's pop
ulation, excursloned to the country
1'alr at Ostahle. There, lonely in all
Hie great crowd, she had stopped he
fore the booth where one might, for the
small sum of Hvo cents, toss three
lines at a rack of pegs. These pegs
were numbered. If you were fortunate
enough or skillful enough to ring a
peg, one received a prize. The prizes
were more or less valuable prin
cipally less. A red-faced person with
pink and white shirt sleeves made
strenuous announcement.
"Here y are. ladles and gents!" lie
bawled. "Here y' nrol Toss 'em In
and ting 'em out. A gentiwino giinrnn
teed prize for each and every rlir.'er.
Look nt 'em. ladles and Kent5!, look at
em! Australian solid nickel-silver
scarf pins! (icnuwlne New Jersey
Ivory napkin holders! Alaska diamond-studded
hair combs for tho
Iit ; Three chances for a nickel,
In.' a dime, live cents! Toss 'em In
and ring 'em out!"
Lurella noticed Mint while many
toed them In, but few succeeded In
ringing them out. Then a newcomer
laid down a nickel and prepared to try
his luck. lie was, she thought, n
striking looking man, thick set, broad
shouldered, Minburned, wearing a blue
uniform with bru-s buttons and a blue
yachting cap. Like her, nnd therefore
unlike the majority of the people on
the fair grounds, he seemed to be
quite alone. She had been on the
point of moving on ; now she stayed to
watch him make the trial.
Two rings he tossed and each shot,
although close, was a miss. 'The
third, however, fairly encircled a peg.
The red-faced person lifted both pink
and white shirtsleeves In the ulr.
"Look at that!" he bellowed. "Look
at It! The gent lings number thirty
two, winnln the genuwlne Alaska stud
ded di'uiond lady's hair comb. He lays
down live cents and he takes away a
hundred dollars more or less. There
you are, sir! There's the genuwlne
Alaska. .Shall I hand It to you or will
your wife put It on now and give the
congregation a treat?"
Lurella was standing beside the win
ner of the prize. The red-faced per
son was dramatically olTeting her the
comb. She blushed furiously. Thu
lookers-on, divining the mistake,
cheered and laughed. She hurried
away. A moment later she felt a
touch on her elbow. Tho broad
shouldered man in the blue uniform
had followed her. Ills embarrassment
seemed to be as great as hers.
"Ma'am," ho stammered; "I I wish
you'd take It. I I'd like you to have
it first rate. I'm all alone and and It
ain't a bit of use to me, honest."
She drew herself tip. Lurella was
nothing if not proper. She hud never
flirted In all the thirty-live years of
her life. Having read a great deal,
she knew exactly what and how to re
ply. "Sir!" she exclaimed.
"Ves'm," said thu man, removing thu
yachting cap. "I wish you would take
it. That that feller was a fool and If
you say so I'll punch his nose. Shall
I?"
Sho was, momentarily, Bturtlod out
of her propriety.
"Oh, no I" she exclaimed.
"I will If you say so. lie's n smart
allele and he'd ought to be licked.
Hut but, honest, 1 do wish you'd take
this thing. Tvvould look nice on you
and and I uiu't got nobody of my own
to glvo It to. I'm n stranger 'here.
Won't you take It, please? I 1 don't
mean It fresh nor tiothln'."
Lurella looked at him. Ho was
about her age, or a little older. Ho
had an honest face, If she ever saw
one. He was blushing and did not at
all resemble tho bold, had lady-killers
of whom she had read In her favorite
romances.
She hesitated. Then . . . well,
then her own romance began.
Hefore she returned to Truniet that
evening she had leurned much concern
ing thu man in thu blue uniform. His
nainu was Obed Kills. Ho was a
bachelor, had been to sea In his
-younger days, had since worked hard
at various employments on shore, nnd
was now acting as watchman and care
taker In charge of the property of the
big hotel nt Orham. During the sum
njer he was in command of the hotel
pier nnd boats, but now, as the season
was over, had more leisure. Ills
wages, he Informed her with satisfac
tion, "went on Just the same, summer
or winter." lie was a Methodist, a
Republican, and his life was Insured
for two thousand dollars, lie was
alone In the world, Just as shu was.
Together they Inspected the poultry
and live stock exhibits. Ho treated
her to salt-water taffy, leu cream soda
and a "shore dinner" In the refresh
ment tent. They saw the trotting races
and the balloon ascension. Hefore
bidding her good-by at the railroad sta
tion, he informed her that he owned an
automobile, and, If she "hadn't no ob
jection" be would kind of like to drive
oer one of these days and take her
to ride.
The following Saturday afternoon
he did drive over. The ride was de
lightful; thu little car rattled and
"skipped" but kept going. A week
latei' he came again, and twice during
the week following. A month later
he proposed marriage. It was then
that she told him of her other love af
fair. When she was eighteen she had
been engaged to a man who kept a
billiard saloon at Pigeon Cove. Later
she broke the engagement.
"I found out," she said with a shud
der, "that he was dissipated. He
never told me, but once I saw him
drunk Intoxicated, I moan. He had
been drlnkln' whisky then, but when
he couldn't get that ho drank Jamaica
ginger. He'd been arrested and In the
lock-up two or three times. If he'd
told mo I might have forgiven him;
I was a girl and I probably should
huvo forgiven him and been sorry af
terwards. Hut he'd never told mo and
I couldn't forgive that. That's why
I'm telling you this now, Obed. Tho
time to tell such things Is before mar
riage, not afterwards. There niur.n't
be secrets between husband and wife.
I've read too many stories In books
about folks with n past gettln' mar
ried, and nothin' but misery ever came
of it. If you've got nnythtng in your
past life now Is the time to tell me of
It, Obed."
"Sure thing!" ngreed Obed, prompt
ly. "What do you say, Lurella? Will
you marry me?"
She said yes, and, six weeks later
they were married and she came to
Orham to live with him In the little
cottago at the rear of the hotel prop
erty. Now, a very happy wife, she
was making him n cranberry pie be
cause he liked It better than any other
kind.
The pie baked, and tho table In the
dining room set for dinner, she
stepped to the kitchen door to pee if
he was In sight. He was not but some
one else was, a disreputable male,
who was sauntering toward her across
the back yard. His clothes, his hat,
his unshaven face, dassilled lilin In
her Judgment ns n tramp. She was
not afraid of tramps and asked lilin
what he wanted.
"Ma'am," he said, "does anybody
name of Kills live hero?"
"Mr. Obed Kills lives hero," she re
piled; "hut he's out. I'm Mrs. Kills."
Tho tramp nodded. "They told me
this was his hnng-out," he observed.
"I thought I'd Just stop in and see
him. So you're his wife, oh? I didn't'
know ho was married,"
"Come In and sit down," she said,
lie came Into tho spotless kitchen and
sat down upon ono of her freshly
scrubbed chairs. Ho looked about thu
room, crossed his dingy, ragged
troutiered legs, and sniffed.
"Say," ho observed, cheerfully,
"that plo over thero smells good lo
me,"
She did not take the hint. "I can
give you some cold meat and bread
and butter," she said, coldly. "Will
that do?"
Ho grinned. "And n slab of that
pie, eh?" lie queried.
"I should say not! Thnt pie Is for
my husband. If the meat and bread
and a cup of tea won't satisfy you,
then'
"Oh, they'll sojlsfy me all right, If
there's enough of 'em. Just watch
what I do to 'cm. Trot 'em out."
She filled a pinto and put It and tho
cup of ten on tho kitchen tnble. "So
you used to know Mr. Kills?" she ob
served. "What Is your name?"
He grinned again, ns well as one
can grin with a mouth full.
"My name Is Dugun," ho said;
"Mike Dugan, but they don't generally
call me that. QM. any more ten?"
She refilled. the cup. "Where did
you and my husband know each oth
er?" she asked.
"Oh, over In tho pen the Jail, I
mean."
The teapot' did not fall from her
hand, but It camo very near It.
The Jail !" she exclaimed. "Why '
why, what Jail?"
"Tho Ostahle Jail, of course. There I
ain't no other In these dlggln's. Oho '
nnd mo were In there at thu same
time."
"When wns this?" she asked.
"Kb? Oh, I dunno. Four years ago,
mnybe. How about comln' ncrost with
the butter?"
She put the buttor-plale beside him.
"Voti and and my husband were
In In tho Jail together four yenrs
ago?" she nsked.
"Sure, Mike!"
"What why was he there?"
"Kb? Oh. same thing that gets 'em
all. Needed the coin, I guess. Didn't
he never tell you?"
She wanted to cry, but Instead sho
tried to laugh.
"Was was you In there for for
stealln'?"
"Me? Not on your life I Rum wns
my ruin, snme ns It's been n wholo
lot of others. Kb? Haw, hawl"
"How long wns was Mr. Kills
there?"
"I dunno. Year or so, maybe. I
ain't seen him since. He got his dis
charge a week nforo they let mo
loose."
A familiar step sounded on the walk
by the side door. Lurella started.
"Vou you stay right hero," sho
commanded. "Don't you go away.
And don't you speak or or move.
My husband la comln. We we'll
surprise him."
She hurried Into the dining room,
closing the kitchen door behind her.
Tho familiar step came nearer. The
side door, that from the walk to tho
dining room, opened. Oheil came In.
"Ship ahoy, old lady!" he balled,
Jovially. "Dinner ready? Ain't late,
I hope, am 1? Why, what's the mat
ter V"
She faced him, white and trembling,
but linn.
"Obed," vhe said, "sit down. Din
neril be ready In a minute. Sit down.
I want to to speak to you about
somethln'."
He sat down, regarding her won
durlngly. "To speak to me?'' he repeated. 'Tor
thu land sakes, what's happened? Is
thu cow dead?"
"No . . . Oh, don't laugh I ... I don't I
feel funny Just now. Obed, do you
remember that time when you asked
me to marry you?"
"Kb? . . . Well, say! Do you think
I'd be liable to forget It? Luckiest
day in my life that was. Why "
"Hush! Obed, I nsked you then If
If you had a past."
"A which?"
"A past. Some secret in your llfu
you hadn't told me. You said no. Now
I ask you again. Have you?"
Ho stared at her. "Uavu you?" sho
repeated.
"What? Say 1 No, of course, I
ain't."
"Obed oh, don't lie to mo! I
couldn't over forgive your lyln' to me."
"Lie to you? Who said I'd ever
lied to you? I'll break the swab's ever
lastln' neck!"
"Hush ! Sit right down ngalu In that
chair. Obed, was you ever In tho Os
tahle Jail?"
He hesitated. Then he colored.
"Why why, yes," ho admitted. "Hut
I didn't think"
"Oh, hush! He still! You were
thero nnd and you never told mo!"
"Why well, no, I didn't. You see,
I was k'ind of ashamed, and It didn't
amount to nothin' much, anyhow."
"Didn't nmotint to anything? Oh.
my soul, how can you talk so? Did
you know a man there named what
was It Dugan?"
"Dugan? Yes, certain. Tough look
in' critter, regiar tramp. In there for
belli drunk and smashln' windows and
raisin' hob generally. Yes, I know
him. He was the only one I had to
look after for ono spell. We got to bo
kind of well, chummy, as you might
say. 'Twits lonesome bein' Jnnltor and
keeper and everything else In a plnce
like that one-horse Ostahle Jnll, and n
feller has to talk to somebody. Tho
sheriff, ho only come around once In a
while, so"
"Walt! Oh, wait! You wore a keep
er there In thu Jail?"
"Sure! I suppose likely I hnd ought
to have told you nhout It, Lurella;
but, you see, I was kind of ashamed,
same as I said. 'Twau't much of a
Job, but I took It 'cause mother wns
sick 'twas Just afore she died and
tho boat shop where I'd been workln'
bad shut down and I needed money.
Then, another thing made me nshamed
of it was on account of heln' fired.
Politics, 'twas. Jim Leghorn, he was
sheriff, and he glvo me my walkln' pa
pers to make room for another Demo
crat, saino ns him. Only Job I ever
was discharged from, that Jail Job
was. I'm sorry I never told you, Lu
relln, Jiut . . . Kb? How did you come
to know about It nnd and that Dugan
tramp?"
Sho did not nnswor. Instead, sho
hurried out Into tho kitchen, closing
the door. The kitchen was empty, so
were the plates and the teacup on tho
table. So was the chair where her re
cent visitor had been sitting. So, too,
was the rack on the back of the stovo
where the cranberry pie had been put
to keep It warm.
A moment later she entered the din
ing room. She leaned over her husband
ami put her arms about his nock.
"Obed," she snld, laughing nnd sob
bing together, "I I'm awfully sorry,
hut you won't have any cranberry plo
this noon. I"
Obed Interrupted. "Crnnborry pie!"
ho repeated. "Who's talkln' about
cranberry plo? I want to know why
you "
"Yes, yes, dear. Of course, you do.
And I'm golu' to tell you. Hut first I
want to tell you how bad I feel about
that pie. I lit tnako two for supper,
and you can it them both, 'ill of 'em,
If you want to."
'Che.
(Copy for This npartment Supplied bj
the American I-eKlnu News Service
LEGION IS NONPOUTICAL
National Commander Reiterates State.
ment That Organization Does
Not Mix in Controversies.
Replying to an assertion that tho
American Legion wns engaged In po
litical activity In California, made In
congress by Representative Cloudy-koo-it.
of West Virginia, Alvln Owsley,
Legion national commander, stated:
"The American Legion reiterates
the statement that it Is a honpolltlcal,
nonsectaiian organization. It Is not
concerned whether Its members nre
Republicans, Democrats or Socialists,
Protestants. Catholics or Jews. It Is
the one all-lncluslvu American organi
zation 'of ex-service men. Tho llrst
qunlllli'sitlon for membership must he
that a man or woman served America
lu her great crisis. It follows then,
naturally, that the man or woman Is
nuulllled to serve America In peace,
now.
"The American Legion is not Inter
ested in the political destiny of any
of the great parlies. A distinguished
congressman seems unable to read the
difference between loyalty to political
parties and loyalty to country. The
American Legion looks beyond and
above all consideration of parly In
terest, and sees only thu good of the
country.
"Mr. (Jondykoontz charges that the
Legion lu California appreciates and
Is undertaking to circulate a speech
of Wllli.im (J. MeAdoo, delivered nt
Fullerton, Cal., last Armistice day, lu
which hi discusses the adjusted com
pinsatlou bill. I have no Information
that this Is true. Hut If it Is, 1 must
also call the attention of the congress
man to the fact that for more than a
year the Legion has been circulating
to Its members and to the general pub
lic the addresses of Hon. Joseph W.
Fordney, chairman of the ways and
means committee of the house at the
present time, nnd the author of the
adjusted compensation bill. If the dis
tinguished statesman from West Vir
ginia will make a good speech favor
ing the adjusted compensation bill, tho
American Legion will, In all likelihood,
give the largest circulation to his
speech that he has i ver hnd lu all his
life."
WILSON AND PADlfCAH FIRST
Former President and Kentucky Po3t
Prompt With Donations to Decor
ate Graves in Europe.
Woodrow Wilson, commander of the
members of the American Legion dur
ing their World war days, was the first
war notable to contribute to the per
manent endowment fund of $100.00(1
which the Legion will raise to provide
for the permanent decoration of graves
of war dead In Kuropc, The llrst Le
gion post to respond to the appeal for
funds was the post at I'aducnh, which
announced a contribution of $'J." within
n few hours after the appeal wa.i
broadcast.
The Legion, in announcing the cam
paign, stresses the fact that the rais
ing of u permanent fund will obviate
tho necessity of making yearly appeals
for contributions. The fund will re
main In the national treasury of the
American Legion, subject to expendi
ture onl for the purpose of decorating
the graves of .TJ.100 war dead In
Europe.
Many po3fs will raise their quotas
for the fund by soiling popples- during
the week preceding Memorial 'day. Le
gion natloii'il headquarters has oh-talncd-a
supply of L'.f.OO.OOO silk pop
pies and has urged all members and
patriotic citlens to weir the flower
lu honor of those who lie in Flanders
fields.
AH SING IS TO BE CHEMIST
Chlnese-American Boy, Recent Ameri
canism Essay Contest Winner, Has
Chosen Profession.
Ah Sing Cidng, thirteen-year-old
Chinese-Anieiican boy, of Kwa, Oaliu,
Hawaii, who won llrst prize In the
American Legion's national essay con
test, was the guest of honor at a recent
meeting of the Ad club of Honolulu.
After the luncheon, some one asked
little Ah Sing filing, who defeated fiO,
000 Amorlcan-horn school children In
the contest, "What do you expect to
study as you grow up and go to col
lege?" And he answered without hesitation,
"chemistry."
Tlie man who asked the question
snld afterward;
"That little Chinese-American hoy
has picked what to my mind Is the
grent coming profession that of chem
ist. Tho world today Is being de
veloped by chemistry, and the great In
dustrial developments of the future
will come through chemistry."
All Sing Oiling will receive a scholar
ship of .$7iiU In any college or univer
sity, donated by Hanford MaeNider,
past national cu'iuunmlcr of the Le
sion. Ciiirland W. Powell, national Ameii
cnnlsin director of tho Legion, has an
nounced that another essay contest for
school children will he hold this year.
WILL CONDUCT POPPY SA!;E
Auxiliary to Co-Operate With Legion
in Campaign All Urged to Wear
Flower on Memorial Day.
"Wear a poppy on Memorial day."
This Is the message to all good
Americans from Mrs. Kdna M. Har
cus of Indianapolis, Intl., chairman of
the American Legion Auxiliary poppy
campaign committee. The aiivlllnrj
has decided to cooperate with the Le
gion In the campaign which s to be
conducted a few days prior to May :tl).
The popples -silken repllias of the
real llovvei" hearing the ollhial em
blem of the American Legion, are to
be sold In a public campaign opening
a few days before Memorial day.
Funds obtained from this source will
be used by local posts of the American
Legion for service work, erection of
memorials, and for donations to the
.?UH),(XH) endowment fund providing
annual decoration of graves of Amer
ican dead lu Kurnpo. A certain por
tion of tills fund which will accrue to
national headquarters of the Legion
will be devoted to I heir service work,
In caring for the claims of disabled
and troubled then, seeking relief
through the agency of the Legion's
national oillces.
,WI .$Jk
Mrs. Edna hi. Darcus. I
In n recent message to members of
the f,700 nulls of the auxiliary scat
tered throughout the United States,
Mrs. Harcus said:
"I know that In your hearts you are
anxious to show that you remember
our glorious dead; that you aro
anxious to pay a tribute of respect
nnd admiration for those who fought
In the war. Let us on Memorial day
unite In a spirit of splendid brother
hood and patriotism and In outward
sign, In memory of those who, fulfill
ing the noblest traditions of their
country, have written another beauti
ful chapter In American history. Tho
nippy of Flanders is a fitting emblem
to perpetually remind us and unfail
ingly teach coming generations our
debt to those who Millnntly saved the
light of liberty for us.
"The unselfish aim of this campaign
should spur us lo action. Wear a
poppy Memorial day. See that every
man, woman and child in .your com
munity and in America wears a poppy
that day."
j LEGION HOME FOR ORPHANS
Kansas Organization is Offered 388
Acres and $25,000 Cash Toward
Proposed Institution.
As u memorial to his two sons, who
died In the service of their country
wilh the Thirty-fifth division, Daniel
Dabney of Independence, Kan., has of
fered the American Legion of Kansas
.",SS acres or land aniT S'-'.'i.OUO In cash
a a start toward '.ho erection of a I.e.
glon homo for the oi plums of ex-service
men and wome::, Mr. Dabney is an
oil man and lias taken this method of
expressing his belief in the Legion and
of paying fitting tribute to Ids sons
and their comrades-at-arms who gave
their lives for their country.
"The Kansas depart incut of the Le
gion Is Inspired by Mr. Dabuey's gift."
says Coiamiinder W. P. MacLean. "tr,
renewed elVoiis in behalf of the chil
dren. It has long been a dream of the
state." he mijs, "to undertake some
constructive program for the estab
lishment of an orphans' home, and this
gift makes a realization of the dream
seem Imminently possible.
"Here Is a chance," says MacLean,
"to do something big for the Legion
and for Kansas. Tho national head
quarters of the Legion Is already con
sideling the proposition of establishing
a national orphans' home. It has up
pointed an orphans' home committee
of which a Kansas man Is chairman.
Kansas can get something that will
focus tho attention nnd hold tlie hearts
of tlie Legion to Kansas to a vastly
greater extent, and that Is the home
and training school for our Legion chil
dren. Wo can get It by taking advan
tage of this big start that has been of
ferod to us by Mr. Dabney, and by go
ing to work at once nnd establishing a
Giiiool that will soon be recogniZ"d
taken over and supported by the un
tlomtl organization."
A citizens' committee at Indopen
donee has been organized and lias of
ferod Its services lu co-operation to
ward obtaining a fund to erect the llrst
building on tlie situ. Tlie proposed or
phanage would he composed of several
cottages Instead of one large building
with the idea of making It a homi
rather than a formal Institution, under
the plans now being considered.
I0IHER OF
LfllGElAMILY
JRecomrnendn Lydia E. Pink
ham's Vegetable Compound
to Other Mothers
Windom, Minn. "I wni bo run-down
that 1 wns juat good for nothing. I was to
bocomo tho mother
of my ninth cliild.and
1 thought I did not
have tho strength
to go ttnough with
It. I took Lydln E.
Pinkham'B Vegeta
ble Compound, and
it hiia surely dono all
I could ask it to do
and I am telling nil
my friends about it
lhnvoanicobigbabj
ftirl nnd am feelina
fino. You may use this lottor to help
i .her Hick motborn." Mrs. C. A.
Moedb, Box G3-1, Windom, Minn.
My Firot Child
Glon Allen, Alabama. "I hnvo bcci
grently benofltod by taking Lydia B
I'inkham'a Vegetable Compound fot
bearing-down feelings and pains. I was
troubled in this way for nearly four
years following tho birth of my firsl
child, nnd nt times could hardly stund on
my feet. A ncighlnir rocommonded tho
Vegotnblo Compound to mo after I had
taken doctor's medicines without much
boncfit. It has relieved my pains and
gives mo strength. I recommend it nnd
givo you permifion to tiso my testimo
nial leticr." tlrs.lDA llYi:,Glcn Allen,
Alabama.
" W ATCTT
THE BIG 4
Stomach-Kidneys-Heart-Livcr
Keep tho vital organs healthy by
regularly talcing the world's
standardremedy for kidney, liver,
bladder and uric acid troubles'
LATHROP'S
1IM6Di,
HAARLttM OIL
ssmmsEtm
Vhc National Remedy of Holland fev
centuries. At all druggists In tlirf
sizes. Guaranteed as represented.
Look for the nimo Gold Madal on mrtry
boxnnil accrpt no Imitation
How Thermopylae Wns Fought.
In a class of Circck history at an
Indianapolis school recently, a youth
was asked to tell the story of the
battle of Thermopylae.
Tlii lad had unusual descriptive
ability, and he proceeded Into the
dory with great zest. None of the
detail was left out. Tho heroic stand
was described as few others could do.
" and they f night and fought
nnd fought," said the pupil. "They
fought until they lost their arms,
Then they used their hands."
Received by Schoal Teachers.
"lieaso excuse Mary for being
Jumpy. She's Just got better of tit
Kldo's dance."
"lieaso excuse Willie for golni
home at recess. He got a pain In thu
boy's basement nnd couldn't get up
tlio sliilr.s," Hoston Transcript.
Applause Is forbidden in Russian
tbentOrs.
Backache Es a Warning!
TIiom! iigi)iii.mg twinges acrim thu
biiuill uf. the back, that dull, tliiobbmg
ti.ieU.ictie may mean sunoui kidney
weakness fct'tious it iii'Kkcted, for it
may lend to gravel, btoae in the kul-in.-
h, bladder uillaiiiiii.itiua, ihopuy or
filial Urilit'H diMtthc. If Jm .ne uf
fenng with a bad back, have ihy
bpclln, hc.ul.icht'H, lifivoiiH, despondent
.ittfickc or disordered kidney nc-tion.
heed Xiituic'n warning. (!et after the
cause. Doun's Kidney Pills have
helped tliuitviiiilH. '1 hey nliould help
you. Ask your nclyltbort
A Nebraska Case
J A. Heard, plas
terer, lluiaboUlt.
Nob., Bays: "With
the least move
ciiarp, euttliiK imlns
fhot throuali rny
bar I; nnd kldnu'ys.
'Chi, tcblm.v flm-rn.
(zWSXbtloriH panned hov-
at&li('rsl1 thnea tit nlsht,
w3Meo!itnhieil sediment
nun i) u r n o a in
f i5.f ll7i P'Ihh.'iko. After us
MM VUJ'I,K Uoan's a short
"i&i.JilVatlnio the secretions
cleared up. Three boxen ot Do.in's
took tho pains and lameness away nnd
left my kidneys and back In a healthy
condition."
Get Ooan'i at Any Store, COc a Box
DOAN'SKPTJifsY
FOSTER-MILDURN CO.. BUFFALO. N. Y.
v&MMa
Laxatives Replaced
By the Use oi lNujol
Nujol is a lubricant; not a
medicine or laxative so
cannot gripe. When you are
constipated, not enough of
Nature's lubricating liquid
is produced in the bowel to
keep tlie food waste soft and
moving. Doctors prescribe
Nujol because it acts like
this natural lubricant and
thus secures regular bowel
movements by Nature's own
method lubrication. Try it
today.
uxnEscni
A LUBRICANT-NOT A LAXATIVE
llllllllllltlllllllll
11 K
uibmmik
Ml
S2