fs &&
RED CLOUD, NEBRABKA, CHIEF
4
st'v4
NOT A BAD MATCH
By DON LA GRANGE.
One day the good Doncon Penny
bone, of the village of Delhi, found
It necessary to drive- over to the vll
lago of Wharton, Ix miles away. He
was hltchitiK up his horse and buggy
when Mrs. Hannah Savage camo to
the hoiiHo to pay:
"Deacon, they say you are going to
drive over to Wharton today T"
"Yeo, I am," was this reply.
"Got a load 7"
"Only a Jug to be filled with lie."
"You know my sister Sarah lives
vcr there?"
"YcB, guesH she do, though I hain't
much of a hand to keep track of
folks' sisters."
"Well, Sarah's got a baby a year
old, and Bhe writes me that It can't
walk yet. Something seems to bo the
matter with his knees or back."
"It. sure orter be walkln' at a year
old. They say I wasn't quite ten
months old when 1 could trot right
out doors. Do you want to Bend any
word to Sarah V
"I want to drive over and back with
you."
"All right. You be ready In fifteen
minutes. Guess the old mare can take
us both and not gtt tuckered out"
Deacon Pennybone was a widower.
Hannah Savago was a widow.
They had both lived In Delhi tor
years, and both belonged to the same
church, but gossip had nover even
hinted a marriage between them. It
had never hinted that either one of
them would marry again.
The drive to Wharton was made.
Tho deacon went to get his jug filled
with oil, and the widow to Bee her
sister and tho baby. Tho baby was
walking all right Tho next day after
its mother had written about Its walk
less condition it had got choked on
a spool of thread and been shook and
dangled head downwards with vigor
ous hand! Ten minutes later It was
taking Its first steps.
The drive out and back waa pleas
ant The widower and widow talked
about the new spire for the meeting
house that was going to be erected
the death of Silas White's cow the
pleotltude of potato-bugs the success
of the late Sunday school picnic and
even the best way of killing off bur
docks so they would stay killed, but
not a word nor a hint of anything
closer. They were just neighbors. If
the subject of the heathen of Africa
had been brought up they might have
discussed it for miles to the exclu
sion of all else.
The deacon's sister was his house
keeper. She waa a sour-faced old
maid with a sharp tongue, and when
her brother got back home she felt It
her duty to say something. She there
fore remarked:
"I suppose tho match was at least
half-made today?"
"What match?" asked the deacon.
"She's been trying to catch a man
(or the last five years."
"Ruth, who you talkln' about?"
"Why, the widow Savage."
"What'B wrong with her?"
"She'd like to change her name to
Pennybone "
"Say, now," replied the deacon as
he fired up, "you quit talkln' that way!
She hain't the slightest Idea of It If
she has I hain't"
"All widders want to marry again,"
said the sister.
"Then let 'em marry, but none of
'em will marry met"
When the widow Savage got home
Mrs. Goodhue, a neighbor, dropped In
to ask about the baby over at Whar
ton that couldn't walk. She was given
full information, and then she re
marked: "Lots of folks thought It funny."
"What was?"
"Your riding ovtr there with Dea
con Pennybone."
"But I don't seo anything funny
about that"
"Well, you hadn't been gone half an
hour when the story was around that
you and the deacon had gone away
to get married."
"Upon my soul! The deacon and
me get married! Why, he don't want
mo, and I don't want hlro. If the
fool-killer would come along he'd find
plenty to do in this town!"
"Then then "
"Then nothing!"
What a curious thing Is human na
ture! Here were two people who
were neighbors and friends nothing
more. They hadn't thought of each
other once a week, unless happening
to meet But now, because a sour
tempered old maid and a gossipy
neighbor made a few remarks they be
gan thinking of each other.
"By gosh!" said the deacon to him
self as ho sat down to milk the cow
that evening, "the wldder Savage
wouldn't be such a bad match if a
feller wanted to marry agin. She's
purty good lookin' when she's got ber
Sunday duds on, and she can talk
like a streak and talk sense too. I've
heard she was a savin' woman, and
had money in the bank."
And as the widow Savage cleared
away her supper dishes she smiled
and mused:
"So they thought the deacon act!
me were going to elope and get mar
ried! Urn! Guess he'd be the last
man I'd think or, though I will say
for blm that he's good-tempered and
upright. He pays his debts and never
Bays anything mean of anybody. If
3 wanted to get married again, which
3 don't and the deacon wanted to get
linarrled again, which ho don't why
why-"
i It is highly probable that tho dea
jwn did eorao more thinking, as in
about (our weeks after that drive to
Wharton and back ho called at the
bouse of his pastor and said:
"Pastor. I know n wlddvr woman
In this town."
"Yes?" was replied.
"Sim's n church member,"
"YesV"
"She's a darned nlco woman!'
"Ue caroful, deacon!"
"I'm kinder thiukln' that as I am a
widower and sho a wldder we might
make a match."
"Yes?"
"Shu's purty well off, and I'm party
well off, and and "
"And what?"
"Why. I'vo como to nsk you what
you think ubout It"
"Do you love her7" asked the pas
tor after a Bllcncu.
"Can't say that thinking about her
has kept mo awake nights."
"Have you courted her?"
"Not a darned court!"
"Deacon, must 1 caution you again
about your profanity! llavo you
spoken to her about marriage?"
"Not a darned I mean not a
word."
"Then, an I gather from your words,
If you marry this widow It Is a seineb
Bort of marriage on your port"
"Why. I'd get a good woman and
her property, and she'd get a good
man and be cared for."
"Such matches are made every day,"
said tho parson, "and I regard each and
every ono as an evil. Every marriage
should bo based upon love. If you
should find yourself loving this wom
an then It would be right and proper
to offer marriage. Unless this Is tho
case I shall hope thero will bo no mar
riage." "I guesB that cuts mo out, parson.
I hain't got no moro romance about
mo than a bump on a dead log."
And it is highly probable that the
widow Savago did some more think
ing, for within a week sho followed
the deacon's trail to the parsonage
and said to tho pastor:
"I am terribly embarrassed, but 1
want your advlco."
"What Is the trouble, Bister Sav
age?" was asked.
"If a man If a good man If a wid
ower asked me to mary him, and I
did not exactly love him, would 1 b
doing right to mary him?"
"Not according to my lights, sister
Yon must learn to love him first"
tBut If I don't have the chance tc
learn?"
"I sometimes think that Providence
has a hand In those things." replied
the good man, though thero was a bit
of doubt in his tones.
It was two weeks later and the
widow was returning from the taw-
mill, where sho had been to order
some boards to repair her pig-pen.
She met Deacon Pennybone face to
face. He was bound for the mill to
order some shingles for tho roof ol
his kitchen. l
"Hope I see you well, wldder."
"And the same to you."
"Did the frost last night nip youi
garden any?"
"Not a spec." '
And then, as the deacon was about
to say that he guessed tho frost had
killed off the horse-flies for good and
all, there came warning shouts of:
"Mad dog! Mad dog! Look out,
deacon!"
He turned to see a mastiff that was
surely suffering with tho rabies com
ing down tho street full at them. He
didn't lose a second. He picked the
widow up and threw her over a picket
fence, and thon sprang after her. The
mad animal came racing up and would
have1 made the Jump had not a big
club knocked blm down and after
wards battered the life out of blm.
After tho marriage, which took
place a month later, the deacon
asked:
"Hanner, dear, when did you first
feel that you loved mo with all your
heart?"
"Why, It was when you chucked me
over the fence!" rho replied as sho
gave him a kiss that lifted him off
his heels.
(Copyright, 1913, by tho McClure Newa
pnper Syndicate.)
BETTER TO ELIMINATE HAND
World Will Improve Whan Machinery
Takes Its Place as the .Motive
Power.
The elimination of tho human hand
is the watchword or battlo cry of
many of the workers for pure-food
laws and regulations. And It Is the
aim of many of tho big producers of
foods, too. The state of Now Hamp
shire not long ago rendered a deci
sion forcing bread to be wrapped
when It was sold. And some of the
big factories where crackers and bis
cuits are made, for instance, have bo
far eliminated tho human hand that
you see human hands only manipu
lating the big steel machlno bands
that touch tho food.
So much for the efforts of Btate
and factory. How about your own
house?
Does the human hand have a too
prominent part In the making of
yonr home-made bread? Even If It
is your own hand, It had better not
be used unnecessarily In the prepar
ation of food. Prom both the stand
point of health and that of economy,
the use of the human hand when it
is poBBlble not to use it ought to be
avoided.
Make this the watchword of your
kitchen, and bo help advance a nation-wide
effort for better food and
better economy In Its making.
The Wit.
Tho Wit 'Lo, Dllll Whntcha doing
since you left collcgo?
"Working In a coffee factory."
"I gotcha. Starling from the ground
up." Columbia Jester.
FIRE
RIES
CAPTURE OF PLYMOUTH, N. C.
Town Was One of Most Important
Places on Sound and Wat Com
manded by General Wessells.
In reply to a query t lit National
Tribune glxos the following iiermint of
tho capture of Pl mouth, N. ... and
the rcHFon for tho Kiirremlor of Gen
em! Womi'IIs:
It was fell iit'i'i'HHary to keep a gar
rison at Plymouth and other places
around the North Carolina sounds,
though these weie leilueed to the
minimum. They were kept there In
Isolated position for two yenin, this
giving the enemy time to plan opera
tions to overpower them. Plymouth.
N. I'., one of the most Important
places on the sound, was held by a
brigade commanded by General Wen
Kells and which' eonslsted of the
Klghty-tlfth New York. Ono Hundred
unci Klrst and One Hundred and Third
Pennsylvania, Sixteenth Connecticut
mid six companies from other regl-inr-nts.
In ull 2,400 men. The position
was fairly fortified, with three gun
boats In the water to assist the garri
son, and It was felt that thl would
be sufficient, hut the enemy had bulll
an Ironclad ram, the Albemarle, and
collected a force of threo brigades,
under Gen. R. F. Hoke, numbering In.
nil at least 7,000 men For nomn rea
son our peopln knew nothing of this
gathering of forces, nor of the strength
of the Albemarle. April 17, 1864. Hoko
suddenly appeared at the same time
as tin ram came down the river and
attacked Fort Warren, I ho up-river
outpost. One of our vessels went to
tho assistance of the fort, but was
quickly disabled. Hoke pushed down
n mile and attacked Fort Wessells, but
wan repulsed several times In his as
saults. However, the enemy surround
ed tho fort nnd got within 200 yards
of It, while the Albemarle ran by Fort
Warren, rammed tho Southfleld ond
punk her, and then disabled tho Ml
nml, killing he? captain, Lleut.-Cpra-tnander
Flusser. Tho Albemarle then
shelled the garrlBon, the attack on the
forts was renewed, and, though thi
enemy lost heavily, they were carried,
nnd tho Confederates reached the
town, so that Wessells was Compelled
to mirrendor, giving up about 1,600
prisoners, 25 guns, 2,000 small arms
and much valuable stores. Tho Con
federates admitted a loss of only 300,
but our people estimated It at 1,000.
The prisoners worn taken to Anderson
rllle, where most of them died.
Loved the Old Flag Still.
After the battlo of Mill Spring, when
:he Minnesota regiment returned to
Its quarters at Camp Hamilton, they
marched past tho colonel's marquee
with bannere flying, and their splendid
band playing "Hall Columbia." Stand
ing In front of tho tent were Dr. Cliff,
Zolllcoffer'B brlgado surgeon, Lieuten
ant Colonel Carter of tho Twentieth
Tennessee (Confederate) regiment,
and several of the federal, officers. It
wob observed that "Hall Columbia"
affected both the Confederate officers
to tcors they wept like children and
Carter remarked that: "Although com"
pelted to fight against the old flag, he
loved It still."
Couldn't Bel lev Him.
Two boys of thu Fifty-eighth Manna
chusetts agreed to settle their dispute
by a fight, and It was understood thai
whoever wanted to quit should n-y
"Enough." Ono got the other down,
and was hammering him unmercifully,
when he called out several times,
"Enough!" Ono of the group who
gathered to see the scrap demanded
fair play, and said:
"Why don't you let him up? Don't
you hear him say that he's got
enough?"
"I do; but no's such u liar I don't
believe him."
What He Was Afraid Of.
During tho war the town loafer at
a country village stood his chances ot
being drafted. On ono occasion ho
nnld to ono of his old cronlcH:
"Well, they nro going to draft ag'ln,
and they are going to put my namo In
tho wheol. What they want mo to
fight for 1b moro than I can tell. I
ain't mad, an' I don't want to tight
when I ain't mad. And then, on tho
other hand, If I should bo drafted and
sent to the front, what honor would
It be to a fellow to get killed nnd havo
his nnino spelled wrong In tho news
papers?" A Towel Relic.
Mathlas H. Lowo, Wallle Hun, Pa,
took a towel with him to Gettysburg
which ho had used during tho war.
It was spun and woven at home and
was part of hlB kit ot saber, revolver,
tlncup and spurs. It was used by the
boys at the reunion of the Eighth
Pennsylvania cavalry.
Evidently Must Be the Case.
Somebody has our new umbrella.
Every time that person raises that
umbrella our namo stares him In tho
face, and yet It Is not returned. Wo
have come to tho conclusion that tho
poor fellow can't road. 'Exchange.
Always 8wltched Off,
Tho telephono service Is said to bo
improving, but every tlmo wo got in
tho notion to say something nice about
It our phone boll rings and a sweet
volco Inquires: "Is this Hobertson'i
grocery?" Cynthlana Democrat.
pamp
HIMU
UiViu ikvsi rWX ii
ffiSa urn-$&tkJli
MANITOBA CROP YIELDS
Gladstone, Mnn.. reports that the
wheat crop of I'M 51 exceeded all ex
pectations. 110 bushels cr acre was
the general yield. The grade was
never better. One farmer had 400
acres In wheat, which weighed 66
pounds to the bushel.
On Portngn Plains. Manitoba, there
were some remarkable yields. Noah
F.lgert had 01 bushels of wheat per
acre; the government farm, 61 bush
els; Geo K. Stacey, 54; T. .1 Hall.
John Hoss and I). W. McCnalg, r.0; W.
Illchardson. ol; M. Owens, til 'is An
derson and TuriibuH, 60; J, l.lnyd,
48's: Jas. Hell and Hold Drown, 48;
It. S. Tully, -:.2; J. WlHhnrt, !U;
Philip Page. 17; .1. Stewart, 4.'.; J. W.
Brown, 30; Chester Johnson. 44; K.
II, Mulr, 42, Lv. Hiadley, 43; W.
Bodily. 40; Albeit Davis, 43; K. Mc
l.cnnghen, 37; farming the same land
for 40 years, J Wlshuit secured a crop
of 4!i'. bushels to tho acre, the best
he ever had. nnd tho yield of Mr. Brad
ley's was on land plowed this spring.
.Mnrquette. Man., Sept. 21. Splendid
weather has eiiubled the farmers of
this section to make good progress
with the cutting and harvesting or tills
season's crop. Wheal Is averaging
twenty bushels to tho ncre, with bar
ley forty-live and ontB going seventy.
Thero has been no damage of any de
scription.
Binscarth, Man., says: Good reports
are coming from the machines of high
yields and good sample. Tho eleva
tors are busy shipping cars every day.
Dauphin. Man.. Sept. 13. Threshing
is general tho grain Is In good shape
nnd the weather Is Ideal. The sam
ples arc best ever grown hero, grad
ing No. 1 Northern. Tho returns are
larger than expected In nearly every
case. E. B. Armstrong's wheat went
thirty-four bushels to the acre, others
twenty-five to twenty-seven.
BlnBcarth. Man., Sept. 3. Cutting Is
finished here and threshing Is In full
swing. This part of tho province Is
keeping up Hb record, whent averag
ing twenty-five bushels to the acre.
Advertisement
The Point.
"Hero nro some excellent oysters
on the half shell."
"Ah, thero you touch me on the
raw!"
SCALP ITCHED AND BURNED
833 South Scioto St., Clrclcvlllc,
Ohio. "My llttlo glrl'B trouble first
started on her head In a bunch of lit
tle pimples full of yellow-looking mat
ter and they would spread In largo
places. In a short time they would
open. Her Bcalp was awfully red and
Inflamed and tho burning and itching
were bo intense that she would scratch
and rub till it would leave ugly sores.
The BoreB also appeared on hor body,
and her clothing irritated them so
that I had to put real Boft cloth next
to her body. Sho would lie awake of
nights and was' very worrisome. At
times she was tortured with Itching
and burning.
"I tried different remedies with no
benefit for months. I hud given up all
hope of her ever getting rid of It, then
I concluded to try Cutlcura Soap and
Ointment. Tho second application
gave relief. In a short time sho was
entirely cured." (Signed) Mrs. Alice
Klrlln. Nov. 4, 1912.
Cuticura Soap and Ointment sold
throughout tho world. Sample of each
freewlth 32-p. Skin Book. Address post
card "Cutlcura, Dept. L, BoBton." Adv.
When a llttlo mun stands on his
dignity ho feels as tall an n two story
house
ALCOHOL-3 PER CENT
XVetJelable Preparation for As
similating the Food and Regula
ting the Stomachs and Bowels of
Promotes Digcslion,Cheerful
nessandRcsl.Contains neither
Opium, Morphine nor Mineral
Not Nawc otic
W tfou DrSAMvumars
limli!t Sum -MxSiHHm
A'ktUS.tt
Hftrmimt
tllCnrinm
UShU.
nmrm Sttd
CtmrSttii Suf
tfwkyrtl fnirtr
A nrrfr-ct Remedv forConstipo
lion , Sour Slomach.Diarrhoea,
Worms.Convulsions.Feveristv
ncss and Loss of Sleep.
Facsimile Signature of
The Centaur Company.
NEW VORK.
Guaranteed under the Food aw
Exact Copy of Wrapper
PUTNAM
Color more goods brihler and faster colors than
You can ilyo Smy Karincrit without ripping apart.
This Is Vital to
OF
Maxwell-Briscoe Motor Car
Made at Tarrytown, N. Y. and
New Castle, Ind., 1905 to 1913
Also to nil Owner of Stoddard-Dayton, 1905 to 1914
Columbia Gasoline and Electrics, 1906 to 1914;
Evcritt Car of Any Model ; Brush
Sampson nnd Courier Cars
THEREARETHREE
GOOD REASONS why
you should have your car
overhauled now and worn
parts replaced.
FIRST; The garage man
can give you better service
and you can spare the
car better now than later.
No matter whether you are
going to keep the car, or
sell or trade it in on a new
one it will pay you well
to have it thoroughly over
hauled, worn parts replaced
by new ones and body re
' painted.
SECOND: We are able to
furnish replacement parts
for all models of above
makes of cars within 48
hours from receipt of or
der. Have concentrated
this branch of the business
at Newcastle, Ind. (center
of population of the U. S.)
Here we have a $1,750,000
investment in plant and
stock. 45,000 separate bins
of parts.
THIRD: And perhaps the
best reason why you should
secure your requirements
now we must increase
prices 20 January 1st,
when the new parts price
lists will be off the presses.
NOW NOTE THIS Never
before in the history of this
industry has a new con
cern, having bought the
plants and assets of a bank
rupt one, taken upon itself
the obligation of furnishing
replacement parts for the
cars it never made.
Writ for onr hno'ilrt. "Hp
to Msko Tuur Cur l.le Tulrr
A Iaiiiii." In whli-li mi
forth Urn Mmwrll ixillrr to
ward owner of th buo
mentioned can. Audrrti
Note: For quicker service those living East of the Alleghenies can order
from Maxwell Motor New York Co., 13th & East Ave., Lone Island
City. From the Alleghenies to the Rockies, order direct from Max
well Motor Newcastle Co., Newcastle, Ind. West of the Rockies
order from Maxwell Motor Sales Corporation, 67S Golden Gate Ave.,
San Francisco.
Automobiles coHt us more than
household furniture every year, and
wo pay garage mechanics and chauf
feurs moro than our teachers.
CASTORIA
For Infants and Children.
The Kind You Have
' Always Bought
Bears the
Signature
of
In
Use
For Over
Thirty Years
CASTORIA
iW
t lfv
.rr m
FADELESS DYES
any othpr tye. One Ifc package colors all fibers. They Jve'ncojd water better jthsn wyotkr dig.
WKITK FOR FHKE bookltt, calen.Ur. blotter!, etc. MONItOt PHUO COMPANY. Qalacy. IH.
Every Owner
A
THE MAXWELL MOTOR
COMPANY DID. We
considered it good business,
even if not a moral or
legal obligation.
WE FOUND 122,000 owners
out in the cold, as it were
pleading for parts. Their
cars laid up and useless In
most cases.
WE'VE INVESTED about
one and three-quarters mil
lions ($1,750,000) dollars in
a plant and stock of parts,
for over 150 different mod
els, made by the concerns
that comprised the United
States Motor Company,
whose assets we purchased
from the Receiver thru
the U. S. Courts.
WE TOOK THE NAME
MAXWELL solely for the
protection of 60,000 persons
who had bought cars under
that name.
HAD WE CHOSEN AN
OTHER NAME those 60,
000 cars would have had
almost no value in the second-hand
market. As it is,
they have a definite value.
And by the replacement of
the worn parts your car
will be good for a long time
to come.
ANY RECOGNIZED
DEALER or repair man
whether he handles the
present Maxwell line or not
can procure these parts)
for you. Or you can order
direct. Shipment will be
made, within 24 to 48 hours
after receipt of the order at
Newcastle.
Maxwell Motor Co., Inc.
1003 Woodward Avenue
DETROIT, MICH.
TheTypewriter
for the Rural
Business Man
Whether you are a
small town merchant
Hfi
or a farmer, you need
a typewriter.
aWfJWJTT " Juu "1W "..,.
Long wanng your letters ana uiua
by hand, you are not getting full
efficiency.
It doesn't require an expert oper
ator to run the L. C. Smith & Bros.
typewriter. It is simple, compact,
complete, durable.
Send in the attached coupon and
we will give especial attention to
your typewriter needs.
L. C. Smith A nro. Typewriter Co.,
HyrariiHe, N.Y.
Pirn m-ud mi) your fre book about
typewriters.
Name... ,,,., ,
P.O
BtatS ,
FREE TO ALL SUFFERERS,
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surra lion money, slaudkx. nervous diseases,
CMONICWKAKNriiEl,ULCIIIS.tKINurTIOIIS.IILU.
Willi (or mr PUBS', book, the most instructive;
IJEnlCAI. BOOS EVEEWEITTEN.ir TELLS .LLboulth
THERAPION UrsiSS
1ICtiritilrlorrouowNltiM. ? stadacaat.
uS.CO.IUVIOC KO.UrTAD. LONDON,.
nnV WANTED irnSod'!0 W i
Nebraska Directory
BOILERS
Vertical or hor
ltonlal new
or second band.
WILSON STEAM nOILER CO.. Omaha
W. N. U., LINCOLN, NO. 40-1913.
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