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r A Bishop In Anger,
It Is popularly supposed that bihop-i
possess tin' power of n-ir control lu n
perfect decree, but .i...ietimei the best
of Ibrm i!i-Iom Hie f.ict Mint, nftei all.
they are 1.i:i men.
On oho occasion n certain I. nil bish
op, elo.jupiii and saintly, vhx.e tiaiuc
Is nlmopt n household wo ril In ling
lnml, was preaching nt the opening or
a nuw elm jrh ami Uv n few days
stayed at n rountr.v home in the reign
Jjorhooil. This MsliKp u.n eve-hvly
fond of n game of billiards ninl could ,
hold his own oil the cloth itgnlnl the
mnjorlty of iiiniitcurs.
During this visit his lonlshlp played
Fevcral quiet wmies with his host, hilt
ono morning had n prolonged inn of
bad link, which so exasperated him
that nt hist he entirely lost his temper
nnd In his rage .snapped the cue In two
across his knee.
This tund netlon deemed to bring the
bishop to his Houses, nud with profuse
regrets lie npologlzed to his host for
Mr conduct, declaring that he would
not have had It happen for the world.
Hut the host coolly replied:
"I must beg you, my lord, to think
no more about the matter. I inn really
Kind that It occurred, as for many
ears 1 have been wishful to see what
a bishop wan like when he wanted to
use bad language." London Til-Hits.
Turner and the Doctor.
When Turner, the fan. mis painter,
was dying at Chelsea he sent In de
spair for a Kamspite doetor who had
done him some good during his recent
may nt that place and who. ho hoped,
might take a different view of his easo
from that which the London pli.ssiclnns
liad expressed. The doctor arrived and
continued the opinion that the artist
liad very little time longer to live.
"Walt a bit." said Turner to the doc
tor. "You have had nothing to eat and
drink yet, have you?" "No, but that's
or no consequence." "Hut It is," re
idled the painter. "CSo downstairs, and
you will Hud some refreshment, and
there Is some line brown sherry don't
upare It and then come up and see me
ngaln." The doctor refreshed himself
and then came back to the patient.
"Now, then," said Turner, "what Is it?
Do you still think so badly of my
case?" The doctor regretfully said he
could not alter his former opinion. The
artist shook his shoulders, turned his
faco to the wall and never spoke again!
Dundee Advertiser.
A Rich Woman's Closet.
"The nearest approach to a. Illuo
leard's closet that I ever saw," said a
.woman the other day, "was In the
country house of one of New York's
most fashionable women.
"I didn't know her, but In a queer,
roundabout way I was once shown
over the house and saw Mrs. V.'s pri
vate apartments. I pretty nearly faint
ed when I walked Into a room where a
dozen or more women were apparently
banging from the ceiling.
"When I came to I found that what
x', I bad taken to be a choice collection
. ot remale corpses was really n lot of
manikins. Mrs. V. bad them made
after her own measurements, and her
choicest costumes were kept on them
When not In use.
rt"Ufr maid would fasten a gown on
to. a, manikin, put something over it to
keep the dust off and then by means
Vr;a rope and pulley draw the whole
thing to the celling. It waa a fine ar
MBgement, but looked as if Bluebeard
had beea around." New York Hun.
) Bern That Way.
(.. There Is per ha pa no point on which
the librarian and child disagree so en
tirely as that of the proper condition
T the hands. A child whoa hands
'were black with dirt solemnly stated,
TJX wan born that way." Another de
clared that the doctor said "he must
nsy. wash his bands till the weather
we warmer." Another whispered.
Teacher, that's the color of my skin."
A boy who brought back a book with
Ita cover soiled and greasy refused to
pay the Hue and dually brought bis
mother in to speak In bis behalf. We
had been very unjust nnd unkind to
her boy, she said, "for he Is very care
ful. He puts his book In the icelwix.
iwherc the baby can't get It, nnd noth
ing but our food and Willie's books
ever goes in that Icebox." Library
'Journal.
j A Few Sufficed.
J Sir Jamfs Crlchton-Hrowue was sent
on a mission to Jamaica in connection
Willi the Hrltlsh colonial office. While
at Kingston he had an encounter with
a colored but very humble official. Sir
James, a strenuous sanitarian and an
ardent Scot, was Keenly Interested In
the Scottish population of the Islaud.
"Do you htivo many Scotsmen In these
parts?" he asked of the official. Tho
darky thought for a moment and then
answered, "Not many; Just a few, but
enough." Sir James collapsed.
A Diplomatic Tramp.
"Why don't you vamoose? I said
no."
"Ah. madam, a beautiful woman's
no oftlng means yes." '
lie got the cold bite for which ho
was pleading, and It was even warmed
over for him. Louisville Cotuler-.lour-'mil.
A Great Art In Little.
"Is there really any art In convers
ing?" "Of course: always say small things
In ti big way and big things In a small
way." Minneapolis Journal.
Outstripped It.
"As I recall things, you once had a
future before you," said the old friend.
"Ves," replied tho fate tossed man,
"but, you see, I lived so fast that I got
ahead of It."
ITuman life Is governed more by for
tune than by .reason, Hume,
TAXPAYER FEELS HIS DIGNITY.
Effect of Ownersltip of Property Is to
Make Getter Citizen.
"Many a tltti'V aid a pilriu.in In
the southern part of the cltv, when
arresting men, ospocialh lntu.i-.rcl
men. I have been told b my pusoticr
that he was a taxpayer and il.it he
helped pay my wage
"I always regarded ihl.- Mir of back
talk us mi'iel.x drunkeir iitsulcnci' and
never paid much attention to It uutil
about a car ago, wln-n I bought a
house and lot and becum- niHf a
taxpayer. 1 had nlias lenti .1 be
fore anil never gav a thought to
taes but as soon as I tuoMil into my
own house 1 began to appreciate the
feelings of the men who resented ar
lest because they paid taxes There
Is certainly a considerable addition to
the dignity of the man who helps sup
port the government. He feels a de
gree of responsibility that a renter or
roomer never understands, and my
Idea Is that every man In the country
ought to become a taxpayer as soon
as he can, and the mere fact that ho
does help to support the government
and bears his share of the expense,
makes him a better citizen Habitu
al criminals, excepting, of course, high
financiers, are rarely taxpayers They
know they may have to inn any day
ami pei haps never come back so
they do not buy real estate, but aio
roomets and lodgeis all their lives."
St. Louis Globe-Democrat
HOLLAND BULB TRADE IMMENSE.
Over 10,000 Acres Devoted to Raising
Tulips and Hyacinths.
An Industry characteristic of the
Netherlands Is the raising of tulip
and hyacinth bulbs. Attempts have
been made In several parts of the
world to grow these, but nowhere can
the experiment be said to have been
successful, as the proper kind of soil
for propagation of perfect bulbs seema
only to exist In the small space of ter
ritory between the cities of Leyden
nnd Haarlem.
This stretch of country Is In reality
the bottom of the old Haarlem sea,
which was laid dry about the ear
IS.":;, and this son-bottom dirt, a com
bination of .sand and decomposed eo.
table and plants, appears to be tlje
only soil capable of pioiluchiK the
(h wer bulbs mentioned.
These bulbs aie exported to all enrt 3
of the world, the demand is constantly
increasing, and an Inci eased aiea Is
from year to year set apart to the cul
tivation of bulbs. The statistics for
lOOii. the latest available, give this
area as 1,038 hectares, equal to 10,027
acres.
First at Last.
Stevens works for a Gorman who Is
In the commission business, near
Washington Market, says tho New
York Press. Stevens came near losing
his Job recently because ot his habit
of arriving late at the office, and It
was not until Schmltz, his employer,
told htm If he was late again he
would be discharged that he mended
his ways.
Now he is telling his friends how
the boss, who. never has been able to
get the kinks out of tho English Ian
guage, complimented htm for hla
punctuality.
"Harry."4 said Mr. achmlta, "I oaf
noticed dot you are early of late."
Stevens nodded and smiled and hi
employer continued:
"You were pehlad peforo! But no
you are de falrat at last."
Well-Oroemed Baiana'.
England Is a park. I o not rem
her who It was that wrote the poem
contatnlug words to the effect that ho
wanted to be in England when It vu
April there, but he may as well have
made it June. So far as one may
Judge from the train windows, the
meadows have all been closely clipped,
the hedges trimmed and rounded, the
sheep carefully stuffed and placed In
position on the hillsides, nnd the road
ways dusted off and sprinkled. It is
all as though the whole country wore
some one's tiont yard. Wilbur D.
Nesblt, In Chicago Evening Post.
Doubly Useful Mucilage.
"If you make your own mucilage
(one heaping tcuspoonful of gum
arable to an ordinary mucllago bottle
gives It at a cheaper rate than that
bought ready made), you can dlspnnso
with court plasters, liquid or other
wise, except where an antiseptic Is
necessary," says Women's Home Com
panion. "Ordinary cuts can be coated
with it quite as effectively as with
the patent preparation. Two coats
thoroughly dried will stand the appli
cation of water better than anything
but tho adhesive plaster doctors u
an Inconvenient, expensive luxury."
A Side Light.
The fortune teller, whose specialty
was restoring lost and stolen articles
by her powers of divination and spirit
help, was perturbed.
She had missed a wallet full of bills '
and a diamond ring from her bureau
diawer.
".Maria." she cried to her assistant,
"have you taken the most effective
means to get thosn articles back?-'
"Yes'm," said Maria. "I reported It
right off to the police." ,
Knew One of the Firm.
Attendant (showing him through
the structure) This house is built on
whnt Is known as tho ' slow combus
tion" plan.
Mr. Pnourltcli Ah, yes; I think I
know Slocutn. I have seen him at the
club; but I have novor had tho pleas
To Be Given Away In Prizes
We want to add 500 to 1,000 new subscribers to our list, and
in order to do this in as short a time as possible we want to enlist
your services and give you a chance to share in the profits with us.
In our POPULAR LADY CONTEST we are going to give three
prizes valued at $550.00, besides a number of smaller prizes which
will be announced from time to time.
FIRST PRIZE
A Chickering Brothers No. 10, $500.00
Upright Piano, furnished by The Chief
and given to the lady receiving the largest
number of votes in this contest.
There is no better piano made than the
Chickering Brothers.
The instrument to be given awav is on ex-
. hibilion at Argabrighl's Studios and may
be examined by . any one calling there.
t The piano is a new one, just received from
the factory especially for this contest.
'11 illaaaaHaiaaaaaHKV H
Till Rf LH9H9HIHi If H
v I lUBffiHaiisH i H
"
'"'"s-
The second prize will be a Ladies' Gold Watch valued at $30.
The case is 14 k. gold filled, hunting style, guaranteed for 25 years. Has raised,
colored gold ornamentation.
The works are of the best; seventeen ruby jewels in gold settings, compensating bal
ance, automatically adjusting itself to the changes in temperature, and has gold train
wheels. Both the case aid movement are fully guaranteed as to durability and time
keeping qualities.
The Watch is on display at Newhouse Brothers.
The third prize will be a five-piece Silver Tea Service.
This service is of a very handsome design, quadruple plate of the very best mater
ial, and is valued at $22.50. The set will be on exhibition in the store window of the '
Mitchell Jewelry Co.
RULES GOVERNING THE CONTEST
1 Announcement This Piano and
Popular L.ady voting contest will he
conducted on strictly honest lmslue
principles, with perfect justice uud
fairness to nil concerned.
!! Prizes The llrst prize bhiill be n
ChiekeriiiK liros. upright, piuno valued
at $.00. The second prize will he n
l-itdieV fine k'old watuh valued ut $!10.
The third prize will b u. handsome
silver tea service Tallied ut fJ'J..ri(. He
sides these, otlitr sptcial prizes will
ho offered from time to time.
.'1 -Candidates Any ludy, married
or t-inulo, in this and adjoining conn
ties is eligible to a place in the con
test. The most popular lady in the
one who shall receive th most Totes,
and to her shall he given this high
Krade piano. Other candidates will
receive prizes in order, according to
their standing of votes.
1 Tie in Votes In case of a tie. the
value of the prizes will be equally
divided or a lika prize grunted to those
tying.
0 Clussos of Votes Those nre is
sued in coupons us following:
New subscriptions, M0 votes for S1.00
Renewals-, 1100 votes for $1.00
Hack subscript ions, .'100 votes for f 1.00
G General Instructions Names of
contestants will be printed in order
according to standing and the amount
or their votes puuitstiaa regular aiiar
the llrst count is made.
Votes will not bo allowed on sub
. scriptious at less than regular pries of
the paper.
Votes once deposited in the ballot
box cannot be transfered to (mother.
Agents' commissions are to lie sus
pended during contest,
No contestant will be allowed to
compete for more than one of the
additional special piizes.
, Tho publisher will not tell whom
anyone votes for, except in case of al
leged error or irragularity.
Each contestant is requested to send
us a cabinet size photogrupn ror pnu
Mention as soon as convenient.
Muko up your mind who you want to
vote for before coming to the ollloo as
tho editor will positively not decide
tho mutter for you.
Contestants should keep a record of
their votes turned in each week, ami
see that our llgures verify it.
All coupons must have the amount 1
of subscription paid, number of votes
cast, nunie of contestant voted for and
name of person voting written legibly
thereon.
I An awarding committee or three re
liable business men will be appointed
I to make the final count and distribu
tion of prize i.
Contest to run not less than ninoty
' days; date of closing to ho announced
, about thirty days in advance.
The contest shall oloe at 1 o'clock
p. m. on the date to be announced
later. Two weeks prior to the date of
I closing, tho Judges nre to take tho
ballot box, carefully locked and wealed,
j to tho bank announced, where it will
I be kept on u table in the front window
during business hours, and in the
I vault at night until the close of the
contest, when the Awarding Commit-
! tee will take charge and make final
count.
Subscription blanks and voting
coupon! will bo furnished upon appli
cation nt tltis ofllce.
All votes must bo accompanied by
subscription money.
$10.00
in GOLD
for the Lady
having the larg
est number of
votes August
22, when first
count is made.
Contest Opens Saturday, July 25, 1908
Make all orders payable to Emory B. DeWolf, Publisher.
VOTING COUPON
POPULAR LADY PIANO VOTING CONTEST
This Coupon is Vottd (or
Nominating Blank
I hereby nominate
of
Amount $.
Sicned
No of Votes
as a candidate in your POPULAR YOT
IXG CONTEST.
Signed
Af
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1 Jrt,
fi.li-'i
ure of. meeting Mr. Uustlon'. JiSU
