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Jewelers and Optometrists.
What Ho Felt Like.
It was the first tliue he luul sung In
nri ICfrtscopnl choir, and he felt strange
ly out of place in the vestments ho
won,. Tlie other choristers looked com
fortable enough, hut the new one was
mire he would trip on the Bklrts of his
cosv-iock when he went up the chaucel
stops, and he know that if he did not
stop perspiring his clean linen cotta
would he sadly mussed. The opening
prayer had been Intoned hy the rector,
nxtd the singers were In line waiting
for the introduction to the processional
la he pluycd, when one of the basses
ithlspercd in the new man's ear:
'You're a tenor, aren't you?"
"I suppose so," he replied, "hut I
-Teel like a twospot" New York Times.
Hindoo First Steps In English.
A native had been caught ut Calcut-1
ta. scaling the wall of tho premises into
the compound of No. 8, Chowrlughi,
dressed In a complete suit of European
Utiics. Tho man had on the previous
Mronlitp nnnppiimri liImHolf Inside a
bop and had employed his time till
morning in lilting himself with a com--jplelc
suit or clothes, including a white
idrirt, with studs and links; a red tie,
carefully put ou; black socks, a pair of
boots, a watch and chain, handkerchief
aud even a pockotkulfe, with a straw
bat and stick, lie even went the
length of writing his name Inside tho
hut On being caught he said ho want
ed to learn English and as a prelim
inary 6lep thought It best to dress him
m( In sahib's clothes. Bombay (India)
Advocate.
The Difficult Handshake. .
It is n dlllicult matter, this of shaking
bunds. To start with, it Is not always
easy to know whether to shake hands
or simply bow or even Just scatter a
jpjnttc smile around. Books of etiquette
6?vole pages to the handshake. How
ever, if one decides to do It, then 'twere
well 'twere done quickly. Let tho ac
tion be swift and brief. London Globe.
No Recourse.
"John. I think I hear a thief In tho
dark closet beneath the stairs."
"I don't doubt it. I have known It
was there for some time."
Telephone for the police."
"What's tho use. You can't arrest a
gns mote??" Houston Tost.
Wlso men say uothlng In dangerous
times.-Seldeu.
You
L
If you do (and the man who does not, according to Shakespeare,
is "fit for stratagems, treasons and spoils"), you will find no music
maker so easy to buy, so easy to play and so easy to listen to as
the Phonograph. The Phonograph plays everybody's music.
You can hear upon it just what you like the old ballads, songs
that your mother sang when you were a boy, and the latest pop
ular sketch from comic opera. They are all sung equally well and
are reproduced perfectly in your home by the Phonograph.
mLJmm-m
2-"- .r V Ov ii JJM II
DANGEROUS FISH.
Ways of the Green Moray of Bermuda
and the Devilfish.
When one speaks of dangerous fish
the lirst that come to mind are the
shark and the octopus. Hut neither of
these Is really formidable to fishermen
The shark never attacks a boat aud the
octopus very rarely.
A much worse creature than either
shark or octopus Is the devilfish a
large ray that is common in the warm
waters of the Atlantic. This tlsh
grows to n weight of n ton and a half
and, besides formidable teeth, Is arm
ed with a horrible barbed and poisoned
spike in the tall. It has often been
known to attack boats.
A Ashing party In a launch succeed
ed in harpooning ouu of these tlsh In
the bay known as Aransas Pas3, Tex
as. The brute towed them eighteen
miles out to sea and very nearly upset
the launch. It was twenty-flvo feet
long nnd weighed 3,000 pounds.
A very nasty customer Is the green
morny of Bermuda. This rather re
sembles a conger eel, but Is green in
color and savage beyond any tlsh that
swims. An English marine odlcer, fish
ing off Bermuda u year or two ago,
hooked a large specimen and begau to
pull it in.
Ills negro boatman, his eyes staring
with fright, begged him wildly to cut
the line. The olllcer at first refused,
but when ho saw the fish turn ou itself
and with a crunch of saw edged teeth
blto a large piece out of its own body
he came to the conclusion that it was
not a nice thing to have in n small
boat.
The swordflsh Is a dangerous crea
ture. Swordflsh aro caught for tho
sake of their oil and flesh, especially
along the Atlantic coast of the United
States. They are harpooned In tho
same maimer In which whales used to
bo killed. Quiet enough until attack
ed, the swordflsh then seems to go
raving mnd and fights with unmatched
ferocity. London Answers.
New York's Noisy Greeting.
Now York, Jan. 1. -With hearts as
light as tho confotti that swirled, bllz-zurd-like,
about tho Broadway rovol
route. New Yorkers toro the last leaf
from tho calendar of '07. Of all tho
boisterous Now Year's oves, there
never was ono nulser and moro hilari
ous Tho celebration cost Now York
era about three-quarters of a million
dollars. I
M
ove
C, B. & Q.
STORIES OF TENNYSON.
Showing Some of the Odd Ways of the
Famous Poet.
In the memoirs of tho late William
Alllngham. the English poet, appear
some Interesting reminiscences of Ten
nyson. Alllngham's first sight of him
was at Twickenham, where Tennyson
was then living. He says: "Soon came
In u tall, broad shouldered, swarthy
man, slightly stooping, with loose dark
hulr nnd beard. He wore, spectacles
and was obviously very uearslghted.
Hollow cheeks and the dark pallor of
his skin gave hitn an unhealthy appear
ance. He was a strange und almost
spectral figure. The great man peered
close nt mo nnd then shook hands cor
dially, yet with a profound quietude
of manner. He was then about forty
one, but looked much older."
In 1880 Alllngham visited Tennyson
at tho lattcr's home, Farringford, In
Freshwater, Isle of Wight. Oue morn
ing they were talking on the downs to
gether, and Alllngham said that he felt
happy. Tennyson said gloomily, "I'm
not at all happy very uuhappy." The
reason, as Tennyson afterward explain
ed, for his particular uuhappincss was
his uncertainty regarding the condition
nnd dcstluy of man. Alllngham was
very anxious to photograph him on
this visit, but Tennyson positively re
fused. "You make bags under ray
eyes," he ald.
At another time during this visit, as
Alllngham writes, they talked of
dreams. "Tennyson said: in my boy
hood I had Intuitions of Immortality
Inexpressible! I have never been able
to express them. I shall try some day.'
I said that I, too, hud felt something
of that kind, whereat Tennyson, being
In one of Ids less amiable moods,
growled: i don't believe you have.
You say it out of rlvulry.' "
Alllngham describes Tennyson's fond
ness for strange antics, such as jump
ing round nnd round like a pigeon, nnd
adds, "He is the only person I over saw
who can do the most ludicrous things
without any Iobs of dignity."
If wo want to educato that sturny,
stolid, unresponsive thing, the British
public, n scheme has to be mildly di
luted with pleasure, masked by bril
liant pictures, like the bitter pill we
hide In our children's Jam. We have
compulsory schooling, of course, but as
u nation wo are not nnd do not want to
bo educated. Loudon Bystauder,
)
US1C
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ison
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Watch Repairers
NEGLECTED BAYBERRIES.
Time Was When the Crop Was Eager
ly Harvested.
Years ago when the first frosts had
come Connecticut people went out to
pick the bunches of bay berries to mako
the pule green wax caudles which
when burning gave out the aromatic
smell of the leaves that the pickers
crushed In pulling oft.
We no longer pick bayberrles for
company candles for the winter time.
Except a few romantic souls who gath
er berries enough to make u candle or
two for old memories, a few faddists
who want to try to make bayberry can
dles by some discovery or other In a
magazine nnd some stanch old New
Englnnders- who love to get out in tho
pastures on a crisp fall day these are
all who gather the bayberrles now.
Left to themselves, the clumps of
bushes have spread out and In some
cases overrun whole pastures. Iu some
parts of Connecticut tho bushes have
grown very tall.
In Branford, on the const, there aro
almost bayberry trees, as many can bo
found growing along tho highways ten
feet tall and some even taller. These
baybenios must be very old. You can
not help wondering how many crops
have been picked off them In years
past.
As early ns 1717 tho town record
show that tho gathering of baybcrrHw
on tho highways and common was for
bidden before Sept. 15., A fine of 10
shillings for each violation was tho
penalty. It appears that the wax from
the berries was used In maklug a
blacking nnd n salve and that bayberry
wax continued an article of trade in
Branford down to the last fifty years.
Human nature being about the samo
ono century to another, there was
probably In 1717 a great complaining
of people who picked tho berries "be
fore they were half ripe" or "got up
mornings before anybody else bad a
chance;" hence the regulation aud the
fine.
But whnt a breathless, hurried bay
berry ploklng It must have been tho
morning of ScpL 15! Hartford Cou
rant Gift for Dakota Weeleyan.
Rapid City, S. D., Jan. 1. A gift
of $5,000 by Andrew Carneglo toward
tno endowment of tho Dakota Wes
leynn university at Mitchell wns an
nounced hero hy Dr. Nicholson, presi
dent of the university.
Tho Way They Finally Disappear From.
Human Sight.
Few people realize what becomes of
nil the old tin cans, tin pnus, kettles,
buckets, coal hods and the like. They
finally disappear from human sight
nnd knowledge and aro seen no more.
Science shows that they evnporato.
When n tin can Is cast away nnd for
saken It Iwglns Its downward courso,
by becoming rusty. The tin oxidizes or,(
iu other words, unites with the oxygen
surrounding It In tho atmosphere, and
tho oxide of tin gradually takes leave
of the Iron by evaporating Into the alr.i
while boujo of It Is washed away by',
the rain Into the eaiih. After the tin
Is gone the Iron of the can follows tho
same course tint has been pursued by
the tin. It oxidizes nnd becomes tho
familiar reddish brown substanco
known ns Iron rust. The metals have
no wills of their own, no affinities, no
understandings, aud therefore no In
tentions as to their present or futtiro
course. They do nothing of them
selves. But electrical forces do their
work for them. These forces unlto tho
nloms of the metals with those of tho
oxygen. Then the molecules of theso
oxides are carried away by tho atmos
pheric electricity nnd disposed of ac
cording to circumstances. '
If a Binnll bottlo or other piece of
glass Ik placed on dnmp ground and
an old wornout tin bucket Is turned
over It. the particles of Iron oxide will
bo tuken away by electric currents
from the old bucket und will be de
posited partly on tho glass, tho ro
mnlnder going Into the air and tho
earth. Deposits of Iron and other met
als are thus carried around by clcc-
trlclty in the atmosphere from place
to place all over ihe earth. Chlorluo
by electric power picks up atoms of,
gold nnd goes with them to the ocean,
where they are as much at homo ns
Bait. All metals can exist In a state
of vapor; therefore they aro to bo
found not only In the ntmosphero
nrontid this enrth, but also in tho at
mosphere around the sun aud tho
stars. If n ray of sunlight Is bent out
of Us course, ns It Is by drops of water
In the case of tho rainbow, the familiar
seven colors of red, orange, yellow,
greon, blue. Indigo and violet aro
spread out side by Hide. When those
upectrn or streakB of light are scientif
ically Investigated about 500 dark lines
are formed also among the colors, and'
these lines represent shadows cast by
elemental substances In the atmos
pheres of the cartli and the sun. Light
mnde artificially and not pasBlng'
through the atmosphere of the earth
aud the sun does uot have these dark
lines.
By menus of the spectroscope, n grad
ually invented Instrument now In use,
but credited to several scientists, well
known elements have been compelled
to register their addresses In bands of
light. Among the first to write them
selves down were sodium, potassium,
magnesium, calcium, chromium, nickel
und iron. Aud the same apparatus
led to the discovery of new metals,
such as cesium, rubidium aud thallium.
All these are found to he In the sun's
atmosphere. By means of the spectro
scope the one hundred mlll'lnuth part
of a grain of sodium In common salt
; becomes as discernible and iinmlstak
, able as the side of a house. This won
! derful modern Instrument has enabled
scientists to find out what the peo
ple who inhabit the planets In tho
solar system of the dog star Slrlus, for
example, have to eat, for without ni
trogen they could have no beans or
spring pens, without sulphur no mus
tard, horseradish and water cresses or
anything of tho kind, although tho peo
ple would be confined to vegetable diet
They would also be without light bis
cuit for breakfast or any fermented
liquors. Baltimore Amnrlcsu.
riciurcsque Newfoundland,
i Newfoundland has .been styled a
rough stone with no interior, and
doubtless to the passenger on some At
lantic liner, seeing its bold headland
Jut tin out Into the ocean, with Its
weather beaten cliffs standing gray
nnd cold, the description may seem a
fitting one. But to those who know it
well, who have scn the fir clad val
leys, lis clear lakes and streams and
hillsides tinged with1 the red and gold
of autumn, It is a rough stone with a
very fair Interior. London Strand.
A Piece of Homely Truth.
"Do you expect people to believe all
that you tell them?"
"That is not the Idea." answered tho
sagacious campaigner. "The way to
win tho hearts of the people Is to tell
them what they already believe."
Washington Star.
Anxious.
Sick Man (who is a collector of coins
nnd also very rich) I made out my will
todny, Keglnald, and left you my col
lection of coins.
"Which one, uncle the on ui tho
bank or the one In iiu .aolnof ?"--r.ou-don
Tit-Utts.
Her Generosity.
He I wish that you wero poor, so
that you would be willing to marry
mo. Sho Evidently I am far more
generous than you. I wish you wero
rich, so'thnt I might bo wlllhlg to ranr-
ry you. Exchange.
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