THE BED CLOUD CHIEF.
THE RED CLOUD CHIEF.
- - PUBLISHED WEEKLY,
AT
RED CLOUD,
Webster County, Web.
frz-
The Bed
Chief.
RATB8 OF ADVERTISING:
Otu Inch. Sr.t inrlirn im
IVh IUtlHU,Hl li-wr-tLa.. m
thre mnntii., , 5,00
Mi month . c
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Quarter column, threw nnth. .... l,08
M Mi -ctIm. 91.MI
taelrvtatnth. . . . 3fyW
Hall column, thn mnth . jm
Mi siutJ. ... aJ.rn
fjrl mouth. 1M
Otie column. tJireo month. sl.i
ii month .. .
M trrU mntfc UU.00
Mirrtvie and ONtwary Notice free. Loral re
tiT liv i-t line, Trnl'ut aj.d IcM A4irrtl
Ek-nli yaMe in adac Yfrlj dxerlimo
xkTalJe jttrier! .
&
iievoiea to the Intercsts'tC Southwest Nebraska
i.
C. L. MATHER. Publisher.
$2.00 PER ANNUM.
TBRiuu,
RED CLOUD, WEBSTER CO., NEf J THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 19, 1S74.
VOL. J.
NO. :U.
Two'Dollars a Year, In Advance.
H
(tOUD
V
v
i
F
-.
J
If
CICKI.Y.
Alkali Station.
jir nnKT haktk.
Ocli jou'n-aixxt; rnajlw; I lut much on
rhyme;
I reckon jou'd kI" c a hundred, ami beat luc
cterytiuie.
Poetry' lhat tho way oine chap put np an Idee.
Hut I take, mine ' atraight ltb,ut Kucar," and
that' what' tli" matter with rue.
Poetry ! Jwt I)k ronnd jou alkali, rock and
Kai;e-bTUh, rock ami alkali ; iin't It a in tty page?
Hun in the Kaat at xuurniiiK, nun in the Wat at
nipht,
Aud the fhadow of thin yer utatlon the ou'y thing
inoictt in Might.
PoMry! Well, no, Polly! Polly, niu to jonrmara '
Kun right away, rr.yjooty! ny-bye! Alut nhea
laait7 , , .
Poetry! That remind me o' Mitbli.' rifiht in that
nit;
Jetd Mint that door, lhar, will er! for Cicely ear"
IP" Cllle.
Vi noted Polly, the bab) ? A mouth afore fche u
ltorn,
l'irel (my old woman) a iuoody-liki and forloni;
Out of hrr head and craxy, and talked of flower
and tree ;
Pamlly man yonreelf. Mr 7 Well, you know what a
woman !.
Nrfriouc Mie wa and reMlee
-said that Mie couldn't
Ma,
hU and the nen-et woman
Feeuteen luileH
away.
Ilut I tlied it up with th doctor, and he "1.1 he
would treou hand;
And I klndrr Mink by the Miauty, and ft need in
that Ml o'Ulid.
One niRht mm tenth of Oilolier 1 woke with a
rhill and a fright.
Tor the tl.mr II wan Mauding oien, and Cicely warnt
In msht ;
lint a note wax piuid on the blanket, which it nid
that Mie "couldn't May,"
Jlut had gone to viot her iieiRhlKir ecienteen mihtt
awa I
When and how
he MainiHtied, i didn't wait for to .
l"or out in the road, next nilnit, I Marled an wild a
he:
Itunuing rlret thin way and that nay, like abound
that in off the eeent,
Kor there wamt no track in the darkncwH to tell me
the way Mie went.
1 e hal Home mighty mean niomentu afore I keni
to tliln j"it
lM on the jiUliiHiu'j", ilrowudetl almcmt.and hhot;
Itul out on thin alkali deecrt. a hutitiiiR a crary wife,
Wan ralj aH tmwitlefartory " anything In my life.
-"C'helj! Cicely! Cicely!"! tailed and I hold my
brtath;
And "Cicclj !" came from thn ran) oil and all wan
Mill a death.
And"Ci-lyl Cii-ely! Cicely !" came from the rockn
U-low;
AndJM but a wliUjH'r r "Cicely!" down from
them al of kuow.
I aiut what you call reiioni; but 1 jcM lookivl up
to thi'Mtj,
And th)rrV to what I'm romin', and maylieye
think I lie.
lint tip away to tho taM'anl, jailer and bic ai
1 aw of a ftiiddint nMiur, ti Mnien-M kind of i
tar.
lilt and jb1I rand daiiciuc, it tx-emed to lieckou to
me ;
Yaller slid bid and iljticliif. such an yon neer
Mr ami yaller and daucitiR, 1 Hcur wr micka
Mid MhouKht or them hari in the iiii.ie. and i
ftar;
wttu torn iiii'iiami in&r.
OM r "hend""" "'1 l l '
Keeping the Mat afore me, I went whereer It led. t-
1 nuuiil net ieen lor an nour, wnen miuiumi iiim
h r and iiikIi.
Out of the jearth afore me thar rix up a lah.v'if rrj.
LiMcii! IharV the
Mine iiiukic; but they aro
Mroiijjer now
Than the U I packed l.f r ami
l,er iimther I'm
diirued if I Jl know bow.
Jlut the doctor kem the next mlniiit; and thn joke
the whole tliiui; i"
That ih never knew what happened from that ery
uishttothiii!
Itut Cicelv hajt you're
,1 poet and maylio you
liiiKut Home day,
JitM t-lmi; her a rhyme 'Ixuit
baby that was lioru
in a curious way.
And pee what Mie '; and, old fellow, when ) oil
ak of the vtar. bul tell
At bow twaK thti itorlor'H lautern for luajlni
'twout pound co well.
THE SEALED WILL
Do you suppose,
the mouev goes from
mamma, in case
me that it will be
given to you ?"
" Dear child, how can I ever guess?
Your aunt, remember, is your fnthcr's
Mstcr, not mine ; so it is scarcely likely
.she has thought of me. I am afraid
the heir in the sealed will is John Gar
laud. ' Mamma !"
" It is only guess-work, dear."
" Hut ho is so unfit to have the re
sponsibility of money ; a man known to
be a gambler and a drinking-mau, if not
an actual drunkard."
" Very true. Yet he is the nearest
relative vouc Aunt Jessie had. excepting '
only voursc
irsolf "
"lean scarcely
would leave him
lars."
think Aunt Jessie
fifty thousand dol-
" My dear, she has left it to you, her
nieco and namesake."
"But upon tho condition that I never
marry. If I do, tho scaled will in tho
hands of the lawyer is to bo oicned.
and the money pass from mo to the heir
or heirs named therein. You must
Lf UU tlUlIUA,
know me well enough to be sure that
,.
the money would never tempt me to
break my engagement; yet for your
sake, I wish oh, why did Aunt Jessie
leave it to mo at all ?'
"Do not think of me. T can live as
we havo done since your father died.
But, Jessie," and Mrs. Markham's face
looked gravo and sad, " there's one
view of tho matter you do not take."
" 1 daro say there aro fifty. Remem
ber, wo havo now lnul only an hour or
two to think since- tho letter came from
tho lawyer. But what is the view you
mean ?"
" Charlie."
"Charlie?"
Jessie's browu eyes were opened to
their widest extent as she repeated the
nanus adding,
"Why, I haven't thought of anything
but Charlie !"
"But I mean dear me!" said the
mother, shrinking from uttering her
thought. " You know, dear, you have
always been considered your aunt's
heiress ; and Charley is young and only
commencing the practice of his pro
fession. It may be that ho will "
"Bo false to me for the sake of
money?" interrupted Jessie, with the
rosiest of cheeks and brightest of eyes.
" e win soon tost this, ami she drew
a writing-table to her -side. "1 will
. send him a copy of the lawyer's letter,
and " here her voice and e es sof toned
" the nvjiirauee that Aunt Jessie's will
makes no difference to me."
Mrs. Markham made no objection to
this step ; but after the letter was
signed and sealed, and dispatched to the
village, by Polly, the only servant of the
Markham household, slu called Jessie
again to her side.
Over the fair, sweet face of the young
girl there had crept a shade of gravity
nd perplexity since th'e arrivd of the
lawyer's letter, that clouded the brown
eyes, and gave the HCDHitive, mobile
mouth a firmer pressure than was quite
natural. Life had Ixjcn all sunshine to
Jessie jrarkham ; 3-et hers was one of
the buoyant nature that find the silver
lining for every cloud, and coax some
sweetness from every bitter dose.
Her father had been dead six years,
and his business affairs having become
complicated in some way not compre
hensible to feminine intellect, his widow
and child found themselves reduced to
an income that barely covered the neces
saries of life. They left the city and
took a small cottage in the pretty village
of Morton, where Mrs. Markham eoon
frocurcd a class of music scholars., and
terself gave Jessie lessons in the higher
branches of English studies, German,
French and mubic, till at eighteen her
daughter also procured a few pupils in
languages. They were very liappy in
their mutual affection, in the love of
their pupils, and the cares of their little
household.
It had been understood from the time
Jessie was a tiny baby thut sho should
inherit the fortune of her maiden aunt,
from whom she was named, and who
came from the city every summer to
spend a month or two in the little cot
tage, always bringing pretty presents to
brighten the homo of her brother's
widow, and lavishing tenderest affection
ujKn her niece.
Yet, though Jessie herself had known
of her annt's supposed intentions,
neither she nor her mother hsid ever
made calculation upon a fortune de
pendent upon the death of the one for
whom they felt the warmest affection,
and the idea Unit otners could e in
fluenced by it was a new thought to the
young girl.
She had given to her betrothed,
Charlie Seatou, the iirst love of her
young heart, believing that his love wan
all her own. In the six years sho had
lived in Morton, child and maidon,
Charlie Seaton had been her devoted ad
mirer from the lirst, and had recently
finished his course of law study and
been admitted to the bar. His fortune,
inherited from his father, was very
small, barely covering his expenditure
for board and clothing.; but he was
energetic, industrious, and without
(, j brilliant talent, a clear-headed, intolli
' cent ptndent. m omitting to make a
eapable lawyer, if not a shining light at
the bar.
Answering her mothers caM, Jessie
nestled down in her favorite seat at her
feet, saying:
"If Charlie was iuilucnced by any
hope of Aunt Jessie's money, niamma,
11 is ocuer 10 kiiow it now. a nau hup-
ixiscd we would have to wait for our
wedding-day until he lnul some practice,
jjjld you KllOW I JiaVO ft JHUO film Ol my
own towards nrsr, cxiienses. o comti
live here, and there, I will not think of
it any more till tho answer comes to my
letter."
'While you wait, dear," said her
mother, " shall I tell you what I think
is tho explanation of your aunt's singu
lar will V You, who know her only as
the gentle, sad woman of her lao years,
can scarcely imagino, 1 presume, that
she was once as bright, hopeful, and
sunny-tempered as yourself. I think
it is to save you from her own sorrow
that she has taken from 3-011 the power
of giving wealth to a mere fortune
hunter. She would havo you wooed and
won for yourself alone, and as sho has
never positively said you were to be her
heiress, she has probably never sup
posed Charlie biased by that hope.
Still, dear, it is possible."
" Yes, it is possible." said Jessie,
slowly; "but toll me about Aunt
Jessie."
" You grandfather Markham, Jessie,
was 0110 of tho leadiug merchants of
New York when your aunt, his only
daughter, was introduced into society.
Your uncle Hoyt was in good practice
as a physician, your father doing then a
fair business, and already married and
in his own home.
" It was, therefore, with tho name of
sm heiress that Jessie danced through
t . ... . . ir . i 1
" ". , "K" 1
her first season, a careless, light-hearted
Sin vcr prciiy uuu accuiujmbu-uu, w
mako a pleasing impression wherever
sho went. She was but a little over
twenty when she became engaged to
Stanley Horton, tho most fascinating
man -in all our circle of friends. Not
I only handsome and talented and he
I was both but possessing in a remark
I able degreo tho courtly polish and win-
ri . .11. t
g Gco 01 manner ia go , ,ar
to1 8an,n81 woman 8Thea.rtV lt ,
- - ! 10 ii iii iriiiiii" iiivi" .1 tt4ii itMi, itir
The absorbing love Jessie felt for
him seemed mutual, and congratula
tions were the order of tho day, when
your grandfather failed. From a man
of wealth he became actually poor, and
losing energy and hope, he came with
Jessio to share our home.
"Staaley Horton, the man we all
supposed a devoted lover, was fully
aware of the change in Jessie's pros
pects, yet ho continued his visits, mak
ing no abrupt, ungentlemanly desertion
of Ids betrothed. Yet wu, who watched
her with the jealousy r affection, soon
discovered n change in her. She became
pale ami sad, often tearful, till finally
she confided to me that Stanley was
evidently weary of her, and had ceased
to lovoher. Even then sho attributed
the change to some defect in herself,
not seeing the mercenary motive till
later, when time had taken tho glamour
from her eyes and heart.
" She gave him back his ring and
Irromises ; thus accepting the position
lis unmanly conduct forced upon her,
of herself breaking the engagement be
tween them.
The first love of her life was the
last. She was vour grandfather's com
fort uutil he died, and then went to
keep house for Hoyt, who lost his wife
and baby one year after his wedding
day. When he died he left her his
house and his money, and she lived
there till she died. Still I know sh.
loved yon, and I am quite sure her will
is uot designed so much to keep yoa
singlo as it is to win the disinterested
love of your fntnre husband."
There was u long silence after Mrs.
Markham concluded her storr, and Jes
sie allowed her h?ad to rest in herl
mother's lap, under her caressing baud,
trying to picture a future of easy compe
tency shared by tho companion of her
life. It had a hrifch nac ; ther was
still love and happiness for her yet.
And then a bright face crowned with
curly brown hair would come before her,
and she knew that neither the hand
some house nor the comfortable income
could ever fill her heart if Charlie left
an aching void there.
Suddenly, like a gust of wind, there
swept into the little sitting-room a tall,
broad-shouldered young man, in a gray
tweed suit and slouch hat, which lat
ter article found a resting-place upon
the floor, as the giant braced himself
before Jessie in an attitude of grim de
fiance that sent thrills of glad music
into her heart.
"Will you have the kindness, Miss
Markham," said the' intruder? towering
in his six feet of manhood over Jcssio's
low seat, " to tell me what you mean by
tho absurd letter Tolly handed me?
Was it not understood that you and I
were to share this cottage with your
mamma until I attained sufficient legal
eminence to warrant the purcJia.se of a
brown stone front in New York ? Was
I not deluded in the belief that yonr
presence in tho culinary department of
our establishment was to reduce our ex
penses to tho limits of our present in
como? Was it not represented to mo
that my present hoard was sufficient to
meet the requirements of two in this
1 - "t . 1 -r v 1 1 - . I
.!. Liuuun, v,. .w ... ...., .
domicile.' in Hnori, iuiss .uarKiiam, 111 1
what way was I ever led .to suppose
that the fortune of your spinster aunt
was to influence in the slightest degree 1
your matrimonial intentions in regard I
to myself ? I pause for a reply."
Jessio stood up, her hantls meekly
)
folded " together, and her happy eyes
downcast till the long lashes kis?ed
n
lcr
cheek.
" Please forgive me this time, and I'll
never do it again," bhe said ; and then
the laugh dimpled her cheek, danced in
her eyes, and rippled out clear and sweet
upon tho air.
"Oh, Charlie! Charlie! I know
you never thought of Aunt Jessie's
money."
"And you," said Charlie, holding her
off at arm's length, " you can have it all
if you give iro up,
" As if I
vou," Baid
loved money better than '
Jessie, nestling now in
strong arms wrapped closely around ' pout items. As I have said, the way in which this
her. It costs 15 cents, besides the regular story is told is inimitable, and, indeed,
It seemed, however, as if Charlie postago, to register a letter ; and all the whole lecturo is admitted to be one
was actually afraid of tho money that postmasters are obliged, when required, of the most uniquo pieces of grotesque
was so temptingly near Jessie's grabp, , to register a letter. rie ever known in these parts."
for he commenced a scries of interviews 1 Internal revenue stamps cannot be
that bore entirely upon the subject of
an immediate marriage.
" What is there to wait for," he
would ask, and then enter upon caleuhi-
tions of his present expenses and those
of tho future, proving most conclusively j
that thero was a decided saving for both 1
in uniting their incomes.
"You remind me," said Jessie, "of'
the Dutchman who said ho could al-
o .,f l.;,.,oir olr... ,..,! ;f u
Itiwou oil''Viu miiinv.il itniiv.. ..111. 11. .-. .
a pity 11 two 01 mem could not uo
it I
entirely."
But, though she laughed at him, Jes
sie was quito willing to admit the foreo
of his reasoning ; and one bright Juno
moniing, six months after Aunt Jessie's
death, there was a wedding in tho vil
lage church, and a breakfast iu the cot
tage for a fow chosen friends. Among
these was Aunt Jessie s lawyer, for the
will stipulated that tho sealed codicil
was to be opened at Jessie's wedding, if
she preferred love to money.
Tho brido was a littlo paler than
usual, when, with n solemn face, tho I
New York lawyer broke the big red
seal. Visions of John Garland hold
ing drunken revels in her aunt's house
flitted across her mind, and then she
looked into Charlio's face, and over
her own crept an expression of perfect
content.
The will was opened, and found to
contain only ft letter directed to Jessie,
ami a short, legally-worded formula
making herself and her chosen husband
joint inheritors of her aunt's fortune.
Tearfully the bride opened the letter
from the dead.
" I do not," she wrote, y approve of
the money power in a family being en
tirely in tho hands of a woman ; there
fore, you will find, dear Jessie, that
half of my fortune only is yours,
the remaining half to go to the
husband who has proved ho loved you
for your own sweet self, not for your
fortune."
During the wedding tour of the young
couple, Mrs. Markham, at their earnest
solicitation, took an affectionate fare
well of her pupils, and removed her
household treasures to tho New York
mansion, to which, in due time, tamo
Charlie and Jessie to brighten the long
silent rooms with thoir happiness, and
established that loving circle which
makes home of any house, however
grand tir however humble.
Length of Rivers.
The table given below contains a
statement of the length of all the long
est rivers upon the globe, together with
the countries in which they are located
INrtr.
Amazon
Amoor. .......
ArkanraK
lJurranipooter...
Colorado
Columbia
Danube
0ifry. Mile.
South America. .. .1,000
Tartary 2.500
United State 2.100
North Mexico. l,lt
Oreiiu Temtorr .. I.IW
."Auatrta lr00
Scotland 100
Pottu.
Oansro Kritiah India l.SHO
Hoaug Ho China 3,lti
A.WU
Irrawaddy.....
Kana...,
Klankn
LaPUte
llunsin Empinr...
, United Slate
....... ..South Anirn-a.....
1J
1.40J
.U,2i
.2,7u
Mackenzie.
United SUtc-
2,-OJ
....4,300
. ..2.nil
3,3X1
I"".U40i
....1,J
.. .l.4M
, ...ilOO
2,aw
ji
..".L0
... f)
AX)
....t.4tX
1,4M
.. .. HO
.. 3
. ...2,.J
Miirouri and Mlsiin,-tjnite.l Mate.
iirer ........
.Africa....
tic.... .........
Ot and IrtiMi...
hlo
lrtcoco
l"ar and Aratfua
Bol riter.
KioOraude.
Uio Madeira
Itto Negro
Rhine
Seine
Seivt!
St. LawTence.....
Trane)e-
Tbarne
Ytnieej
......Siberia ,
United Stale..
......liniana..u... ..
...... Brazil ,
... ..LoniMa&a. ......
Brazil
......Columbia
..... .Gerruany ... ...
..... .Prance . ........
. .Wcet Africa .
......North America.
. ...United Stairs
lJRVand
......Mberia.. .. ..
One of the singular coincidences con
nected with the status of the members
of the Iowa House of Representatives
this winter, is the fact that there are
thirty-five Grangers among the Repub
licans, and tlurty-five among the Anti
Monopolists, Tho extraordinary di
vision, therefore, is wholly outside and
j independent of the gmtHte element of
eiuicr Fnie,
"S.
Rate f
urrrafab
Postal cards, one oqai each.
Letter go to any part of the United 1
States for three cents pfrlialf ounce, if I London just now is Mark Twain's ae
prepaid. Jfr J count, in his new lecture, of the ' buck-
Unpaid lettcre areiiiMU to the Dead mg horso which he purch.ised in eva
Letter Office at Wasfcjhlgton. da. It is impossible to put it on paper,
Letters weighing ogr half an ounce, as half of the effect produced by the
and prepaid a singlo taw, are forwarded I story depends upon his manner of tell
to their destination iad the balance 1 ing it. It would appear that before
duo collected on delivjy. . purchasing this bteed he had no idea of
?tff lntrjrt TTmnt tirtftnl 1 I Iwn wlinf Mmnttni,' mAAnt ltil wad ln iiwm1
ccntK iMr half ounce.
W..J rfl,..w mmm m l'-l'f ."V I
Letters not called '"(jf prepaid) will
be returned to the F-jjt &t his or her
request without dir'"3 postage.
Postage on books nll exceeding two
oimces in weight, two cents. Each ad
ditional two ounces, or fraction thereof,
two cents.
NKWSPAPEKS.
Newspapers sent from tho office of
publication may be prepaid at the fol
lowing rates quarterly :
DMlien, 7 timeit a wtek 35 teuU Jkt qr
Dailiee, (i timen a wiek anient j-er ijr
Weeklies 3 reuti" r T
Menthlieit (foretery four ounce or
fraction thereof) 3tenta er jr
yuArterlieK 1 cent lT ir
MISCEM.ANKOC8 MATTKIl.
On unsealed circulars, mans, mints.
.'.'.
iinim.vttifTD anvici.. nirtt! n inrmti-nlihu
"H"""d "". v.n.ir., j.uwhiuj-uo,
types, cuttings, roots, seeds, etc., on
ona package to one address, prepaid,
ot exceeding two ounces, 1 cent ; over
two and not exceeding four ounces, 2
Jnts ; d 1 cent for every additional
""ce or fraction thereof.
, money oiujeks.
.ttumjj-.iiuMiiuniiuvi-n.ui;i-oiiin..TO
in most of the large ciUes and towns, at j
which orders can he obtained upon any
other omcc, at the lollowmg rates ol
commission :
Onorden" uot exceeding 'M .lOceutu
OiertJO.and uot cxreedlrur Kui .l.lrentM
I Ovfr f, auil not excetillUK f 10 'JO cent
ijer fl", and not rxtetdiuRfoO . . ...S5ctlit
. No single order issued for less than
I one dollar nor more than fifty dollars.
Parties desiring to remit larger sums
1 .- v -. . . "
must obtain additional
niouev orders.
No anolicant can obtain, in one dav.
more than three orders uavable at the
same office and to the same pavee.
used to pay postage.
Stamps cut from stamped envelopes
nro not allowed to be placed upon other
letters. '
No artielo contained in glass can bo I
sent by mail to Great Britain and Ire- '
land. - 1
The revised rates of foreign postage !
TftnniTMiiTArMiiuKutMi.
Uttcn. c centa per half oum.
N-'wi-papem...
'1 cent each '
JIaj;jiJnc.
...2ccntK per I otiiut 1
Brentit per I ounce. I
. .8 cent per 1 ounce t
ilookB..
t Sample . .
A Female Soldier.
The military annals of most Kuro- 1
pcan countries, says tho Loudon r.cho,
record a Jew instances of women who,
having succeeded in entering the ranks
of the army, have highly distinguished
themselves in tho apparently incongru
ous profession of arms. Such a fact
has, according to the Opininnc, been
hitherto unprecedented in the Italian
army. It was discovered, however, the
other day, that a young soldier named
Marcotti, who was to receive his dis
diiirei' nn rim first of next month, beinrr
enlisted in 18UG, is one of these hero-
ines. Julia Marcotti, the Amazon in
nirestion. Deionceti to a numerous ami
poor family, living at ban Arabrozio,
near Turin, and worked iu tho mines of
Upper Piedmont, to which lattercircum
stance her extraordinary physical
strength may. probably, bo attributed,
Sho enlisted in 18fG, at the time when
Italy was about to engage in the strug
gle with Austria, her motive being to
, save her brother, who was married and
I had six children, from being obliged to
I -r . -' a
serve, ot only did .niua penorm a
a soldier's duties as well as her com
rades, but she fought in tho lirst rank
at the battle of Custozza, and obtained
tho medal of military valor. On hcar-
ing of the case, King Victor Emauuel
sent for the woman, bestowed upon her
tho Cross of the Order of the Crown,
anil desired that she should oc sent
home with a pension 01 .HX) lire.
A Law Examination.
The following racy examination of
candidates for admission to the bar is
token from the Wcttcrn Law Journal.
The examination commenced with :
" Do yon smoke ?"
" I do, sir."
" Have you a sparo cigar 1"
"I have, sir." Extends a short six.
"Now, sir, what is the first duty of a
lawyer ?"
"Collect fees, sir."
Right. What is the second ?"
"To increase the number of clients."
" When docs the jiosition toward
clients change ?"
" When making ont a bill of costs."
""Explain."
" We then occupy the antagonistic
EDsition. i become the plaintiff and he
eoomes the defendant."
" Suit decided, how do you stand with
the lawyer on the other side ?'
"Cheek by jowL
"Enough, sir. You promise to be
an ornament to your profession, and I
wish yon success. Now, are yon aware
of the duty you owe me ?"
" Perfectly."
"Describe it."
"It is to invite yon to drink."
"But suppose I decline?"
Caudidate scratches his head.
" There is no instance of the kind on
record in tho books. I cannot answer
the question."
"Yon are right. And the confidence
with which you mske the assertion showa
conclusively that you read the law at
tentively. "Let's take a drink, and I will
sign your certificate at once."
Onlt one eclipse will ho visible frvm
this continent in 1874 of the niooi
total midnight October 114-25. There
will le one other cclipe of the moon,
partial, and two of the sun, during th
year, lint tibese will not' bo risible here.
The great aatronosucal event of the
year will be the trtLrsit of Yonofi, on
Dec 8. scxssi tlc fAci rf the sun.
Mark Twaia's Barkis? Horse.
Moncnre D. Conwav writes from Lou
don of one of Mark Twain's latt sto-
ries. as follows :
"Tl.n ilk- nt Kt.n...-p
... UUVAUJg U.Ub, St KtU IUU fflUIIU
to ask for information. This, however.
ho obtained through the discipline of
experience. He mounted the horse.
Thejinimal then gatheretl its four feet
ia aJioach benoathL apdby a sudden
upward fling sent kim (Twain) into tho'
air just 150 yards. When the audience
smiles at this, Mark looks troubled at
their incredulity, but proceeds. From
this ascent he returns, alights in the
saddle, and the horso gives another fling
Twain going 150 yards in the air. He
then tells his smiling audience that he
' judged it was that distance by the look
of the steenles ; but confesses he did
j not go into details. This aeent being
repeated, he remembers, while m the
1 air, heariug some one on earth say, ' He
might have known that was a bucking
i,h.. .
"..
upon
which the fact flashed
upon mm. ninio lie was aosent the
'it time, some one cut the horse, which
started forward, and when he came down
jt was lipon tjie grtmmi. ne conia not
KJlv he regretted it. There was no reason
f0r tjie i,ORc remainiug on his account.
Friends gathered around him after this
t . , ....
descent, as they always do when one
wants to bo iett aiono, and asketl it ho
wated this or wanted that. What he
rcaiv wuted was to sit down. He did
so. Ho placed one hand on his head,
another on his stomach, and, indeed,
thinks that if he had had sixteen hands
he could have found suitable places for
their application. But as for the horse,
ho assures his audience that this and its
1 other antics such as walking about on '
A 1 la a i . I
us jiinti leei, wiui its iimmos under its
arms, like a Lord Mayor were all nat
ural talent. The horse had len brought
up in the wild West, and had never had
any advantages to develop these gifts.
Population of Cities.
The population of the chief cities of
the United States is indicated by the
subjoined tablo :
1 s:
?.3
fc:
Altnuy . .
Italtiiiiore
lloMou
lirooklju
lluftalo
CharltMon..
Chicago
Cincinnati ..
Clexeland
iMroit
Indiauajiolia..
Jtrwj City .
lxiiiiMille
Memphi
&,it!
K.M7 fAMe. 74
02,'A.7
212,411
177,! 2
!Ji.7,3SI
.v.,44'r.,7.7'j4 :r.',.vw
IU.V),M
87,Pr,;,J47,013 3.4M
tai,(W
lt4.7ic:rji.M2
4.-i37 117,01
4,HW rj,74t;
144..V.7 -itf.CSl
4,944 200,714
0O0 Nl.pjll
W,t73 31,210
3,091 . 109,200
V-H-Hljlfll 144
ii
, tH,W
ellH.
iI(VfJ
I 7'..577
I Ki,Mfi
1VJ.7S3
. to.rjfi
tf.ei'A-iKi.xv.
:W,8I. 91,335,
33.31 77,331 S,tt
10,6X7" 43,:i 'AWl
31,.!.r. 1,40! 705
i.iv.i, i..i.rj
4:1,417
1,011
4.l,4
IW.03J
22.023
4,24i5
KI.25H
71.941
:,204
25,BVi K'.,7.ij I4.9M
fi.TMOt 2,75' in.171
Milwaukee...
AI.il.ll,.
, 71,410
3.1,773 7I,'iC3 176
.! 1.1V1 13.91!
3i,KM
Newark. ..
New IIaeli
Nc Orleaun.
New York ,
Philadelphia .
ltK.ltti
I ),K4V
191.41H
fll-VKK
35.HM 103,J,7
1,79
1.749
14,3V, I'J.OS-O
4H.475 I4fl,VZI
50,540
U.073
IOH.073
419,U74.V."...19'.
1KI,(U4!A31,IM
22,147
50.,529
I Pittaburi-h ...
N-.UTC
I 51,03
27,-. 4,001
17,177 00,320
3,771 27,V
21,l4 01,919
73,7191 130,039
112,'-'192H,7J7
13,7571 73,731'
2,013
2,559
23.110
49,217
.'0,000
37,910
4N.204
5i)2
151,70
01.122
Itoi Idence .
I i1,.,;,"
, San Krmnciwro 14'..tj
17.2,3X6
4J7
l,:t30
.:'. -"- "."""
22,0
(1U9.199
1 -
35.4W
Cnhing'H Vitality.
"Caleb dishing, vitally considered,"
savs the Louisville VourUr-Journal, "is
a caM-iron edition of Leslie Combs, and
everybody in Kentucky knows that Lea
lie Combs doesn't mean to die at all.
Why, Caleb dishing is not more than
half as old an Dr. Graham, and Dr. Gra
ham walks ten miles and works ten
hours a day, and is younger than half
tho young rascals in Louisville who
waste their sweetness niion tho desert
air of
ball-rooms, billiard-rooms and
I lager-beer saloons. Leslie Combs will
J never die. Dr. Graham will never die.
Caleb dishing will never die. They are
sprung from the same generic stratum,
which is eternal. The Republican ma
jority in the Senate need entertain no
apprehensions in that direction. Caleb
dishing will live to write an obituary
notice of his old friend Ben Butler, and
to pronounco a Btiperb enlogium over
the remains of Gen. Grunt. He will
live, as Jolin Bell once facetiously said
of himself, a perpetual legacy to the
American people, surviving the ravages
of Umc."
Brier, Bat Pointed.
Chaplain Ives, alia Capi. Spooner, a
desperate rascal who has been infesting
certain portions of Wisconsin for some
time, was nren a severe lesson, accord
ing to the LaCrosse Democrat, at War
ner's Landing, the other day. Detect
ing him in some of his villainy, the boys
put a rope around his neck and hauled
him up to a limb. After choking him a
while he was let down, when the follow
ing questions were asked and answered:
"Are yon a liar?"
"Yea!"
" Are you a thief ?"
" Ye r
" Are yon a son of a gun ?"
" Yes !"
Will von git if we let vou off?"
"Helen Blazes. YES!"
The rope was removed, and the fellow
" broke brush like an elephant." They
think up there that he must be running
jet
Fires. The Boston Journal has made
out a detailed statement of the lotuses by
fire last vear in this country, the larger
by actual record and the smaller by
estimate. aDd finds the amount to be
$85,000,000. Of fires that destroyed
less than 100,000 and over $50,000
worth of property, there were 152, the
property consumed being S3.539.000.
Of fires destroying less than 50,000 and
over $20, COO, there were 300, the looses
being $8,530,000. Saci a record as this
for a year not marked by mch extraor
dinary disasters as occurred in the .two
nreccdinaT rears furnishes a Jeston
I which c'jtht to b read with profit.
AH Sort.
Oli folks say thut winter in like lSlf-
Pauls ate five thousand horses last
year.
The uet State debt of New York U
321,lii7,:iS3.
Dtsn.ELi will probably visit America
early next year.
Kite strawlwrries atConterville, Cal.,
on New Years day.
The list of Jav Cooke .v. Co.' crotli
tors fills more than two pages of the
New York JleraUl.
The w(h)ig party
is very strong m
CougresHJust now. Tl
bald-hidedJi.n thrc.
Aiiiui.1: uw pvvvitt
'
The amount of gold dug in California
siuce 1S18 is Sl,:JS0,700,0lH of which
93,000,000 was mined in 185.J.
Two millions antl a quarter of people
have emigrated from Ireland to America
during the hist twenty-two years.
Tun expeuse of running railroads in
Italy is enonnous. 11 very ton of coal is
bought iu England, costing 10 (gold)
j.)cr ton, and tran-qiortodat an enormous
cost to Italy.
The degree of risk in traveling on
English railways is evidently not very
great. Iist year there were UM),0tH),
000 passengers, and of these only 1,500
suffered from accidents.
John II. Lynch, colored, is the young
est man in the United States House of
Representatives. Ho was a slave,
without education, nt Natchez until the
Union army entered that towu. He is
but 2t years old.
One of the largest books in the world
is in process of manufacture in Pari.
It will contain the names of all tho ia
habitants of Alsace and Lorraine who
havo proclaimed their wish to remain
French subjects.
On the wholo globe, at least ninety
million coplo speak the English lan
guage ; alx-ut seventy-tlvo million Ger
man, fifty-five millions cak Spuuish,
and only forty-five millions speak tho
French language. These matters of
fact may serve to remove erroncoous
opinions.
The Cuban insurrection has cunt the
Spaniards 10,000 to 15,000 soldiers and
$10,000,000 per vear since the opening
of hostilities. In other words, in the
last five vears Spain has wasted SU0O,
000,001), and lost between 50,000 and
75,000 troops by bullet and disease, in
a vain effort to subdue the Cubans.
The two negro girls whose bodies are
naturallv united nt the bins, and who
were, until lately, shown in this conn
trv, are now tin exhibition in Pari.
They are called the Two-Headed Night
ingale, and their Manager, Fraucom, is
getting rich with them. Ho brooks uo
artificial rivalry, and has sued the pro
prietor of a concert saloon who shows
two girls whose jointure is effected by
fastening them together tightly in a
single boddice. The complaint is that
the bogus curiosity injures the business
of the genuine.
I
The SiameHO Twin.
Prom the New York Urrald.
The Siamese Twins, Eng and Chang,
lately deceased in North Carolina, were
afllicted with illness in the vear 1871.
They were liorn in a littlo village on the
coast of Siam, in tho year 1811. Their I
parents got their living by fishing, and j
until Ibi'J, when r.ng and Chang were
brought to the United Statet, they made
their living by polling helHih. Their
mother ljore seveuteon children
one time she gave birth to three,
and
never less than two. Jlut none 01 ihe
children were deformed. Tho twins
were united at the anterior part of tho
chest by a prolongation of a kind of
fleshy band the size of the hand. This
bond of flesh is about two inches broad
and four inches thick. The whole m'ujs
is tough and capable of being consid
erably extended. One could whisper in
the ear of one of them without the
other hearing, while volatile salts ai-1
plied to tho nostrils of one had no effect !
on the other ; and while pinching the j
arm of one excited no sennatiou in the I
other, still if von but stick a pin in the
exact vertical centre of this connecting
link both would flinch from tho hurt.
Tho twins were seldom observed to con
verse with each other. They nlayed a
good game of draughts, made pretty
much the same moves, and at tho same
time, and frcquet.My played against
each Other.
After attracting a vast amoint of at- tvr hin U:mtter waj,h dav, and hw
tcntion among Focntists and physiolo- I mnne al, j., now trying to kwn a
gists m the old world, they married tvo ' jjarT
sisters, and settleil dtiwn near Sallis-"
bnrv, N. C, on a wall-stockctl planta-' Sevekal timid but wclbmeaning x
tion In addition they had at one peri- pic fearing that the ottiidanoi upon
od ample fnnds investel through their Gough's lecture would lw j great as to
agent in New York. During the war
they continued to reside on their plan
tation and lived in the same quiet and
harmony as ever, until some fewr year
affcrwanl. Of course, no one ev?
thought of drafting them, and their
negroes prospered, except when ont of
temper from any cause, it wss apt to
work itself off in striking the first one
that came to hand, from which the best
escape was to keep ont of the way. The
brothers probably never would have bad
any difficulty, but that their wives,
though sisters, turned away their hearts,
and children were the catisc of this
estrangement. Up to the period that
each had five children, all prospered
well enough, but one of them had a
sixth, and this awoke envy and jealousy
to such a degree that the twin sisters,
not being bound together like the twin
brother would no longer live tinder
the same roof. The brothers were, it
seems, about 54 years of age, but one.
we lelieve. the mailer and feebler of
the two, looked, it is said, ten years
older than the other. They cavld turn
either back to back or face to face, but
is as far as the remarkable bond that
united them permitted. Since the
breaking out of the rebellion the ttrins
both drescd lu the Confederate gray,
and were both riniera of the wrae
church, having nnited with a ssaall
Baptist Church in their neigh bo rhwd,
of which lhv were considered very
j worthy n-nhers. though born Siamese.
'I'AlJIll' V Kit MUX OK KtCKL-MOIl."
"I rowtni; ilul Irmlttr I. hi.
WWn l&rouitti a t-B up lt SwuftUlu titrf pbl
A lirelh f a t.'T, t hi. neck lu the ! :
A he millM, hi. MitlUkh be .wmhc ' at fn.
Kajtal. n' Ot. the tep I am NhmmI tr tw t,
HJbcr'
He Ukrl tuairtal J, aad hl ee j Hlhl
A. a tile of tHlf cM a eowkt wtnt.-r ttt&t.
And ill. S tril ttiit h m.1.1 eull jm lM
A he e- uot hU tvuth aait l-l eat jrM,
It'.up Uthe top eft Sic tummiMB 111 WS
O&letx rmered up wl.l thl Wther.ik httow.
He JSr t
ThrtHJith the lJ.i he . lie llaeled 4frC,
The lUh t aX lite candle, and, Ar w arm ;
lint a U clmuk of fell oer bla be.!
Usd a ulrl aud tretu, b) SI. !ktrHk, he nl.
II ' up till the rry tlp-tnw I will ruh.
And thru If it fall Jt . u MM Hit rh.
Ileiaber:
WhUl a lilt, .aid u utit liwili, tMMi bd
"l' ,A.
A the aui that fell ttii n lb. mi.rUe nlsblff
shure, jrll fait in tl atb-r. me hiirfi Ud,
Pur the'ulftit 1. .tk ami ttie atilta ltl,
lleilail ! he'd Ut bt t m onl ikM id.
Ilut he'd go till the tep If he wlut n ht h"..l.
A bright. Immtit ;tMiu trt, Uke Im t
ki.l.
Am1 him wadbl 5e Mta. ul !" ,'0M h ft.t :
.napping hi tiHire" axt IhI hi. rj.,
While Mmttlliic utxti her. H.lr U. Irpl
PMth 1 Uieut to lv mttll Utta Um Im
llllt a jer ati rlf ha. allot IHr. I im) a. ofM
thop,
1W jUr
He htoped all nUtlt and he btl )-t aH tl.)
And ye tHH4ut N- ktIM nlirli he dhl u ?
l'or weiihlu't he l a bMrl uaiH
To If latin' hia dallllil ill the .koat- bti-fluaii!
Whin the old !un ha yratVe. M4i;h ami t !!
Sh lire he tnoishl a well ht) il twa eoirtflt.N'
there.
11 JaUr !
Htiniorou.
The best thing to tako befon singitiR
Breath.
SciiooLMAsrKit "What is nothing?"
IUy " It is when a man anksyoult
hofd liin horse, and jut saf. Thank
you.'"
tontll lU haate
.No tUoe H watte
PriH'Ulm to all rrnMfc'ii
That men are !
Whiad.enie
In the ptr-ent KHetattMM
" Do r:iv and talk a btth ounuion
sense '" eclaiuiid a MinvtntJi 1h1v to
visit.ir. "th!" wuh the reply, " but
wouldn't that be taking an unfair ad
vantage of you?"
Tipkins aiouscd hi wife from a hound
sleep the other night, saying hn hud
seen a ghost in tho hiqe of an own.
" O, let nn sleep," ntvs tho reply of tho
irate dame, "and don't bo frightened nt
i our uun
cli
udow.
A nkwspapeu paragraph says thitt a
Chicago girl complain to the )Milie that
she has been robbed of 22! gold ring.
Wherciqon, a mean paragraph!! ob
serves that, probably, at leiut 200 of
them were engagement ring.
"I say, Josh, I war gwino down do
mnt't rtt wader day, un I until tr.;
bttrk." " Why, dat am nothing. Sum.
I seed one AoiVr once," " Wal, I d
tie saino tree Icitir." " Ya 1 ya 1 ya 1
Did he take hi trunk w id him? " No;
he hit dat fi
for board.
A Gkhman peddler sold a liquid for
the extermination of bugs. " And how
do vou iiho it?" inquired the man, after
ho had bought it. "Ketch to bug, un
drop vou little drop into hin moid, an
swered the peddler. "Tho doiico yon
do "exclaimed tho purchaser ; " I ceuld
kill it inhalf the time bystampingor.it."
" Veil, ca inly exclaimed tho German,
"dat is a gtMxl vay, too."
KvEitv person who has ever mot a com
mercial t unst, with hin littlo Hatch'!,
will appreciate tho following: "Tim
drummers camudown like wolves 011 tho
fold, their toes were all fronted, their
noes all cold. Thoir weather-jH'eh'd
bugles soon shone through tho town,
tiiov fiilililoil tin mn'iev mid Riilifd it
ilittrti tlwTi tuitf it fnv tinier utiil lit
( out of here, with their howl
1 ,, ,.r 1,.,,.. ...,t, !,..;,- !,,,, i full !
business and skins full of liwr."
A YoHKMiim: cook rcrcned her laul
basting in this manner :
Underneath lbl rrtlM
IJr the nxnildeHnc !"'
Of Klranor IUtcli-4.tr Hbtrit,
Well erd In th ari
Of j Ire, rnMard am! tarte.
And the lucrative trade f tb wu.
Wb'U Mie Hied W'llrf rutnhr
the made her Jt Jfliff,
Aud now he ilth II',
Aud make her dirt pir.
Id bji that eruat may l ratl '
Ianbrr!es.
A Nlw Haven editor siwul last Kun-
dny m Slawson, and attended church
When the communion nox camn
around h was in a doze, but on lxing
nudged, hastily explained, " 1 have a
pass."
A Daniicky roan who having various
ly and nnsiircessfiillv tried to kn"p hrns.
I w-.h u-a,.t lmintiM-a tlimritrli tfm Win.
1 endanger the btiilihug, gave their tick
cU to friend and wsiu-d at home for tho
catastrophe.
We aro pained to lnrn that a gentle
man who has lx;cn in the habit of enter
taining and astonishing his neighbor
in this vicinity by gracefully lighting
his cigars with currency, has a carpet
bag at a Htockbridge hotel doing dntj
for a board bilL
Aboat HjCreB-iobia.
In bis late work on the " Influence-
of the Mind uiwn the Body." Dr. Luke
j support the hyiwdiesis that bvdro-
phobic RvmptouM axe often dovtip,d
without previous inoculation. In iliW
tration, he rehta a notable instance of
a phyr.cian of Lyons, who, having as
sisted in the dissection of several vic
tims of tho disorder, imagined that he
himself had become inoculated.' 0 at
tempting to drink, he was seized wiEh
soiso of the pharynx, axd in thi con
dition .roamed abont the streets for
three davs. At kneth hi friend sthc-
creded in convincing hira of the grousd
Icssnos of his apprehension, una he at
once recovered. Dr. Marx, a Geraa
physaaan, writing to the 1inte, re
gards hydropliobxa as a morbid aJeo
tion of the imagination ladnoed by fear,
and, in support of hi opinion, cite
tome interesting cases wtach peraoa
unaware of the snpertitioa have t
apcd the spASaC
. V ' "-'"
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