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About Nebraska herald. (Plattsmouth, N.T. [Neb.]) 1865-1882 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 7, 1880)
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AI)VEHTI8IJTO BATE II.
rusu5HiD rrcnr tucxdat,
rfT 1R! TR; A Hj T1)
Bi'Acn 1 w. i w. 1 1 w. lis. 3m.m. l jr.
1 iqr... $1 09 $1 M $1 00 JJ b J0 91 M 11 M
2 Kills IM 1C 173 lit IM 1IM KM
Ssqrs. in STi 40 7i IM UW MM
col. fi 00 100 ltN 11M MtN MM MM
H Col.. 8 00 1100 It CM 1800 26 40 1 MM
lcol... 1500 1H00 3000 y.00 4000 00 IWM
m. vim St., on- rvoi-v Moi-it of Min,
Cr. f f-i'Lj Street,
1ST Advertising Bills Due Quarterly.
137- Transient AdvcrtlsmenU must t Far
JNO. A. MACMURPHY, Editor.
TERMS : $2.00 a Year.
lr? 6:r:!sfei r.j Pi's h Cis fczty.
TnM In AcW'.ncs :
tHT Extra Copies of the IIkhald for sale by
J. P. Youno, at the Post-OfDee New Depo
er;-y, tir mi
PLATTSMOUTII, NEBRASKA, . THURSDAY, OCTOBER 7, 18S0.
y I B 3 T
fo'i.s- Eli rRi l. u ..
!:. .. Dovr.v,
A. V. Mci.M iilll.TN.
J n :i i Kjuiif.k
Vice I'l Tsident.
7 '!!!! is now oi:i fir business ?.t llirir
new rin:n. corner Main a:"! ixtll sirifets. Mid
l rrrj;;:ct. to transact a general
Eon 's. G :. P'verp.mer.t er.d Local
prr-'i: r and sued.
o-t ' ii r:." jrr:; ':!'.
.! i and
i v .- r.i.:
(it man Like aiid Allan Lin
t . : Oil wis
to l.rhij; nut t'.ifir friend from
p i " k n a ? f. i irrtrvis ri:.o rs
T K r o u Ii t f rir.ltFintli,
KiVH r,!T.', in(! nnsiinxn.
Tr?.."E FiMtK The ;r.u En-TRACS !ASIC
.n u-if i I in ,i-ci
ciiie !r S-mi- t "t. o
.- :'.? .....I ..If .1 ;...." ' C.&
7:A:.N e that f-:i'-vosw
. v- h : . . . ' ; Tv.'iT
EEr""?"" TAXiSC. .- Lou of AFTIS TAS1S3.
Memry. Uni ci--i Iissltud. IN in in the back
fi of i' l'rc niiiii:' oil! A:ro, ami
rany nt iirr : ,Piw lint. len.l to In;iitv or
BgmptiD. a-.d a I'iv-n.tur Cnvo.
n-irllrnhir'! i'i n;:r rainphlrl, which
fl vir t m J ff" l'T ni.til to e?x oto
tTfll' S.i'-:!i- .ii. -, .,i.t i,v all flnsir-
rit ? 1 pr i.;i.-kie. orn piu-kii-.'-s for
ir trtil I -n ti .. ( y in
;.t rf the
mnff, tiy ifi.ln-- .ir.:-
i in-: ;-:.v 'jjiKiiNK t o.,
Mrcm tNt"-.-.' ;.!.c k. ln:r::'.MT. "!h ;t.
r?TSfla m rl:.tjtiv.r!h un l ewi-y v. licre, 1y
ni m it . n ft - rn 1 fr 1 ti r i lnjnih- m
ATfryn t t ypi i.rhwcvrryom feel
I Tr.il rT-l if r-i
K r r -If "-"1 rrti,T. trrltt Bay it.
l.st C"i is. 1 !: .d"t fc';-i
T orey bot jc.r! Im saved hndrcaa.
K-i Ct'i fTT'-H-i' ' V-'. -V riitu.
Lhr. C.T.1 T i: rT'--'. Ak -;-; lit..
S3 l'l im r T--- I )jrT, i-i r-f L'Kiivo
M . i 71,""" . !ir, I.: ) IXarrlKOA,
I Ki.vn, ! AT"'. rn4 ur.til at
z.si in f r t-- c trvo n'l
;i ;jr -M rTrl "t"V" lu-t
. irk k Pp. v u ' m V 1 - 1 r- Ti. um4 la lu
cu wort, n 1111
iMuck il itr ra-:m. 11 r- -t the I it:M
of all !',.. t1 is kin- injurifua to 111
t -; in -.
i v-t r it ii..
Ei, IS? 5e wkr.
NIIW UE3TAURANT !
'..r?r Mtirt -P..1 ...roi1 SttveH,
flWJsite U. d- M. II 11 Pc.sxcwr Depot,
Via ATTsMOl'TH, NEB.
1 AS. Prop'r.
2IXAI.S AT ALL OURS.
Cigars and Tobacco,
iJIti iiUiiU Jitui. ItJiiiii:-, ai.
fciiieit'!: a i-j.ic i't tin public patronage, I i
&k;i try. 1 y ,t.-.i .iru. ! ive sa,tisfactitu :
to:.::. J a s. x uoi'sox. i
Het Keat Market
T. H. STAMUFOK'fll,
:;i:m i;v M-:n
that I to kr-.i -.t f.: -l a f 'i !! well
Fre.?.ii Betf, Pork,
-.SFiTON AM KOj-S.
Game and Fisii in Season.
fcr 1:1 I'v t u.j;cl
.-!. i ecu uiy.
11'. : a'i wni-i.k si. v;
H'-, 7' i . -J5 1 - er r 1
. V iijicilA IX feL iUii :
.. . . . , !
. 1 . :i. f a . 1 I : 1 1 : ' 1 '
ilati.. b!re.-i. Cc: iter of I'n'i!'..
I'LJLTTSiiOCTJI. --- -
Still Better Rates for Lumber
Schlegel & Kieman,
lSucfesrs to A. S !tr.K;Ei, & r.r.o..
And dealers In
SMOKEKS' FANCY AKTK.LES, SMOKING
T 0 UACCOS.
Special BliANDS and sizes of CIGAKS made to
order, and satisfaction j;narautet'd. Cigar
clippings sold for smoking tobacco.
Main Street, one door west of .1. S. Duke's store
(illni!c I'tist iffirc,
Platt.smo'jtii. Xkb. Im3
Hardware, Cdtlery, ITails,
STOVES and T1X-WA11E,
Iron, Wftod Stocli, Pumps,
FIELD & GARDEN NEEDS, ROPE,
J AND ALL KINDS OF SHEET
IRON WORK', Kept in Stock.
NEATNESS & DISPATCH.
All Work Warranted.
J. G- CHAMBERS,
Manufacturer ot and Dealer hi
iM4 C KO.a HZ
ETC.. ETC., ETC.
Dons with Noatnessl Dispatch.
1 i p oiilv Place in town here "Tu"ley's iiat-
ent st-'if adjustable horse collarsat'c old.''
GROCERIES OF ALL KINDS.
Lane stock of
BOOTS and SHOES
CLOSED OXJT AT COST
m4 in fstt Pvevyt!ii:i.tf yon cn call for in
the lieu' of
cash r.viD roi: HiDEi and fl-ks.
A!i i-inds of eur.tvy u;odute taken in x
?llyr.(.ri ter i'ood-i.
Thflncrli Shaking like an Aspen Loaf
With the chills and fever, the victim of mala
ria may st ill recever !y uiii!i this celebrated
specilic. wiiieh not only breaks up the most ag
gravated attacks, but tnevents their recur
rcnep. It is itillnitelv preferable to quinine, not
only lccaii-e it does the business far more thor
owjihly but al-o 011 account of its perfect whole
coir.eiicss ai d invigorating action upon tlie en
For sale by all DniL't-its and Dealers
11 :-.r.'.Tii-i in.' '-'ic.it pleasure to bear testimony
to 1 : o.'i..-iUn 1 have received I rum usinr
j Feil.iw- ( ii!iip..i:iid s-yrup of II pophosphites.
I 1 have 1 .'ciiMiacuilcd it to many of my friends,
i ami it h.: proved an excellent curative- for
J NerYoUMicN- :!:.! (.t in r: l I'ebilitr. It is also a
lSist-clas.- top.:c.ei;ali!cs personsto take on tlesli
r ipi.ily. r.iid i f ice 110m the eout jpatms ef
I frci cimraitevi-! ic of o; her touici I have tried,
i 1! KMtv Johnston, Montreal.
Heatl Dr. Larle's Toli'monial.
Mr.. Jamks I. FKi.l.ows.Maiiiirai-turini; Chem
ist. Sir : For several months pas! I have used
! your Compound Syrup iu ti'e treatment of 111
i 1 i. v Ir ! t-inieM 1 1 lit lii-is, eh ionic l.rone'.ui is 21t.it other
I afiectious of the chest, ami I have 110 hesita
j'LATS 1 tiaii in stati'..:: that it ranks foremost ,.moi'.ast
1 the reinolies iiseii in nunc diseases, l.cin an
' ect'ilei.t net votis tome, it exerts a direct influ
ence on the nervous system, ami iiiroiseii 11 111-
vicorates the l.ody. It a'b.ios u.v plva-ur to
recommend a remedy which is leally tood in
cases for which it is intended, when mi many
. . .1 .. 1 . ...
dl Vl'l !-'. 1 a.e worse i:i.;n uro-ss.
1 am, sir, yours truly. t
z.. rs. r..ua.r., .jis., ji. i'.
It cures Asthma. Loss of A oice, Nema.iZia.
! St. Vitus' Dance, Kpileptio Fits. hooping
I Couph, Nervousness, and is a most wonderful
I a;l iu tie t to lk; her remedies in sustaining life du-
v:l' the process ot Diphtheria.
Do uot be ;i ; eived I v remedies be : ring a
1 ;-.!nilar i:::r:c : nt other preparation
j a substi: i-,t.' for t his under any
j Prit r, 8I.0O iK-r HoUlc. Sis for $7.50.
i SOLI) I5Y ALL DKFG:ISTS.
stem-winacr.l' ret; wiinevery oiuer. uui
tti Irce. J. it. Oaj lord ii Co CIUciwo. IU.
II. II. JMiADB,
I'MYSK'T VN and SFUGEON. ofiice in Fitz
jjcrald lilock, wbicli will be open day or night.
St. A. II A RTIWAX.
ATTORNEY AND SOLICITOIt. Will Prac
tice in lh State and Federal Courts, licai
denee. l'hittsmoiith. Nebraska. tlly
II. El. LIYIXIiNTUV M.
rnvsiciAN Jfc SUIKJEON.
OFFICE HOCUS, from 10 a. m., to 2 p. ill.
Exatuinin? Surgeon for C. S. Pension.
Ilt. W. II. KtHIL,lIXKt:HT,
rUACTISING PHYSICIAN, residence on
Chicauo Avenue. lMattsmouth . Nebrsaka.
Oilice iu C. Ii- Wescott's ClothluK Store. 4i"iy
COLLECTIONS H SZCTALTT.
ATTOKNFA' AT LAW. Ileal Estate. Fire In
surance and Collection Auency. Otlice in Fitz
gerald's block, i'latlsmoiiih, Nebraska. 2Zui3
UV.it. f. SMITH.
ATTOKNEY AT LAW and Itcal Estate Bro
ker. Special attention given to Collections
and all matters atieetiin: tlie tine to real esiaie
Oi'iiee on L'd floor over Post OUice. I'lattsniouth
Nebraska. 40 I.
i. ii. n ur.i:iiKK & t o.
LAW OFFICE, Ileal Estate, Fire and Life In
surance Agents, IMattsmoutli, Nebraska. Col
lectors, tax-payers. Have a complete abstract
of titles. Uuy and sell iul estate, negotiate
loans, c. ' J i
JOHN 31 U It F 1 X ,
NOTAKY PCP.LIC Will attend to burins
and selling lands, examining titles, making
deeds, paying taxes and collecting debts. Will
also attend to law puits before a Justice of the
47tf Factouyvii-le, Cass Co. Nfi:.
SAM, "W. CHAPJIAX,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
And Solicitor in Chancery. Office tu Fitzger
lyyl rLATTSMOCTH, NEIi.
11. B. Windham. D. A. Camphkli..
Attorney at Law. Notary Public,
WINDHAM & CAHI'BKMi.
COLLECTION AND KEAL ESTATE AGENTS
Oflice over W. II. Baker & Co's Store.
Plattsinouth, Nebraska. -Oly
JAMES E. MOIMtlSOV. W. I.. Ill'OWE.
ioit!:i7. A; uitoivxr..
ATTORNEYS AT LAW. Will pra:- Ice in Cass
and adjomtng Counties ; gives stiecia: attention
to collections and abstracts of title. Oflice in
Fitzgerald Block, Flattsmouth, Nebraska.
17v 1 .
STKVKXSO & SirilFIX,
ATTOKNEYS AT LAW, I'lattsniouth and
Nebraska C'ty. Neb.
In os. 11. Stkvknson, I E. J. MfltKIN.
Nebraska Citv, Over Smith & Black's
Neb. I Drug Store,
l.ily Plattsinouth. Neb.
ii YV. CI.I'TT j;ti.
Oflice on Main Street over Solomon & Na
than's store. :54'.y
C. 13E:3S2:S., frcpriolor.
Flour, Com JItal d- Feed
Always on hand and for sale r.t lowest cash
pi ices. The highest prices paid tor Wheat and
Coin. Particular attention given custom work.
I.A TTSMOTTII XKSSIIASKA.
Place of business on .Main St.. between 4th
and .Mb streets. Shampooing. Sharing, chil
dren's hair cut ting, etc. etc. l'Jly
FRED. D. LEH Nil OFF,
Morn i ii Dew Saloon !
South-et'.st corner Ma n and Sixth Streets.
Keep the best of
Beer, Wines, Liquors & Cigars.
3;;ni'. Constantly on Hand.
If you want any
Fire or Ornamental Brick,
J. T. A. HOOVER,
LOUISVILLE, - - NEBRASKA.
BATES & EOHNK'B.
New Carpenter Shop on Main Street,
Comer of 7th.
Iu the Carpenter line.
SIGN, CARRIAGE AND ORNA
Shop over the Iriek Ulock next t.
PLATTSIOLTH. - 4ly - - NEB.
Excelsior Barber Shop.
J. O. BOONE,
One door west of Knloniou.v Nathan's Store.
S 11 A V I N G AND SHAMPOOING
Especial attention given to
CUTTING CHILDREN'S AND LA
?ALL AND SEE UOOXE, GENTS,
And tot a boon in a
S T O "V Hj S ,
'r s tj rvr u xT .-x ,: 9
ETC., ETC. , ETC
One Door East of the Post-Oliice, I'lattsniouth,
Practical Workers in
SHEET IRON, ZINC, TIN, BRA-
Large assortment of Hard ana Soft
Pumps, Gass Pipes and Fittings.
Wood and Coal Stoves for
HEATLi 011 COOKING,
Always on Hand.
ivxy variety of Tin, Sheet Iron, and 2in
Work, kept iu Stock.
MAKING AND REPAIRING,
Done on Short Notice.
-if' EVER YT11 IXG lVAHIlAXTED ! ;J
I'UM I I.OAV DOWX.
A. S. PADDOCK. V. S. Senator, Beatrice.
ALVIN SACNDKKS. I. S. Senator. Omaha.
E, K. VALENTINE, Uepreseutat e. West ..Point
A I.HIN I s s. A M K. tiovernor, Lincoln.
S. J. ALKXANDEK, Secretary of State.
F. W. LKIDTkK, Auditor, Lincoln,
;. M. BAKTLETT, Treasurer. Lincoln.
S. It. THOMPSON, Supt. Public Instruction.
F. M. DAVIS, Land Commissioner.
C. J. DILWOKTH. Attorney General.
l;KV. v. . IIAKKIS. Chatilain of Penitentiary
DK. H. P. MATTHEWSON, Supt. Hospital for
Supreme Court. ,
S. MAXWELL. Chief Justice, Fremont.
GEO. B. LAKE, Omaha.
AM ASA COBB, Lincoln.
Second Judicial 2)irfrict.
S. B. POUND. Judge, Lincoln.
J. C. WATSON, Proseciiting-Att'y. Neb. City.
W. C. SHOW ALTEK, Clerk District Court, -I'lattsniouth.
N. St'LLI VAN, County Judge.
1 1. TC I T. County Clerk.
M. PATTEUSON, County Treasurer.
W. ID KHS. SlientT.
II. XVOOLEY.Cn. Sup't Pub. Instruction.
W. FA I BFIELD. Surveyor.
P. GASS, Coroner.
rot' NT Y COM M I SSION ERS.
JAMES CKAWFOHD. South Bend Precinct.
SAM'L BICHAKDSON. Mt. rieasant Piecinct
ISAAC WILES, Plattsinouth Precinet.
.1. W. JOHNSON. Mavor.
J. M. PATTKBSON, Treasurer.
J. D. SIMPSON. City Clerk.
KICHAKD VIVIAN, Police Judge.
W. D. JONES, Chief of Police.
F. E. WHITE, Chief of Fire Dept.
1st Ward-F. GOKDEIt. C. H. PAliMELE.
".1 Ward ti W. FAIltFlELD. J. V. WECK-
3d Ward D. MI LLEB. TIKIS. POLLOUK.
4th Ward P. MiCALLAN,
i'otlmatler-iO. W. MARSHALL.
B. & M. R. R.Time Table.
Taking Effect April 11, 1880.
FOR OMAHA FROM PLATTSMOUTH.
Leaves 8 :00 a. m. Arrives 10 :05 a. m.
3 :4'i p. in. " 5 :00 p. m.
FROM OMAHA FOR PL.TTSMODTn.
Leaves 9 :00 a. m. Arrives 10 :10 a. m.
" 6 :30 p. 111. " 8 :15 p. 111.
F0 THE WEST,
leaves Plattsinouth 9 :30 a. m. Arrives Lin
coin. 12 -13 ii. m. : Arrives Kearney. 7: 40 p. in.
Freight leaves at 10 :30 a. in. and at 7 :15 p. m.
Arrive at Lincoln at 4 :is p. in. auu j- :.i a. in
FROM THE WEST.
Leaves Kearney. 6 :oa a. m. Leaves Lincoln,
1 .05 p. m. Arrives Plattsinouth. 4 :i" p. in
Freight leaves Lincoln at 11 :15 a. in. and 4 :00
a. m. Arrives at I'iattsinoutli at 4 ;40 p. m. auu
t :50 a. in.
Express, fi :O0 a. m.
Passenger, (train each day) 4 3 p. in., except
Saturday. Every third Saturday a train con
nects at the usual time.
It. V. Ii. It. Time Tabic
Taking Effect Sunday, -lju il 11, lSO.
7 :U 5
1 N A VALE.
lar. ( n,,T F . N-c I I've
l'vel OIi L. LANS rar
AilltlVAI. AXM III'.I'AIITI KE OF
EASTERN', XOKT H KliV ANI SOL-TII KKN.
I Depart. East.. 4 : 00 pm
Arrive 9 :.".o am CB.SsKC North! :00 pin
7: 30 pin xiiiin o : ihi am
I C B Q E;Lst 0 :00 am
OMAHA, VIA 1'.. M. IN 'EII.
Arrive.. 10:30 am Deiiart 3:10 pm
VVESTEltN. VIA 11. & M. IN NE1S.
Arrive 4:15 pm I Depart 9:30 am
Arrive 11 rooaui i Depart 1 :00 pm
KOCK r.l.L FKS ASH UNION MILLS.
Arrive 11 :00 am Depart 1:00 pm
J. W. Marshall. P. M.
WEEPING WATER BANK
or Rccu imos.
This Bank is now open for the transaction of a
Banking Exchange Business.
ii nros ITS
Received, and Interest allowed on Time Certi
Drawn, and available in the principal towns
and cities of the United Slates and Europe.
Agents fur the celebrated
Mmi Line of Steamers.
Purchase your tickets from us,
Through from Europe to any
Point in the IV est.
REED BROS., juf Weeping Water. Neb.
CO ' j
r A A III AwSh'Aa
iat m j . i i
B - 2
c n '
"' 13 -- 3
- . 2 t a
ci 0 G
te h.f.imithih- ma;
We lEavIf e FtiiLa ami Close Eiaspectloia of our fiotl& before
purelaaslsig elsewltere. ools sol d at IPriees f Eiat
i S -. '1
QMoiaey llefiisaded fr all
;-; i rv
Mext door to Jisigre
JSrciliozcil (Repzibliccux TLcltet
For President oftlieDsitel States,
C?V. 71S I. GARFIELD,
Tho Next Senate.
The present senate of the United
States consists of seventy-six mambers,
of vvheni 42 are democrats, 32 re
publicans and 2 independents.
One of these independents (Davis, of
Illinois) may be classed as a democrat,
and the ther (Booth, of California)
may be classed as a republican, leav
ing the senate divided politically re
publicans, thirty-three; democrats,
The official term of twenty-five sen
atois expires n March 31, 1881. These
are the following:
Randolph N. J
Kernan -X. Y.
llald vrin Mich.
Burnside 1. I.
Hereford W. Va.
Successors t tUesa gentleaoen have
already been elected in Maryland,
Ohio, Mississippi, Rhode Islam!, Ver
mont and Virginia. Maryland has
elected Gorman, democrat, to succeed
Whyte. democrat; Ohio has elected
Garfield, republican, to succeed Thur
man. democrat ; Mississippi has elect
ed a democrat to succeed Bruce, re
publican; Rhode Island has re-elected
Burnside, Vermont has re-elected Ed
muuds, and Virginia a elected Ma
hene, independent democrat, in place
ef Withers, democrat. These chanes
balance the state of parties and leave
it as it was before. Of the states t
elect the coming winter the following
may be considered as certain to sleet
republican senators: Connecticut,
Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Min
nesota, Xfcbraska, Xevada, New York.
Pennsylvania and Wisconsin ten;
and tlie following as certain to elect
democrat senators: Delaware, Florida,
Missouri, Tennessee, Texas and West
&f elj Vri Kz t
MaM3lE ?ATIIT !
EJOHI'T Fa-EST THE
nff So & (Do May
. m a rm
For Vice-President of tne Dnitei States,
Gfl,. CHESTER A. ARTHUR,
OIT NTD"W Y"OE,K.
Virginia six. This will leave the
state of parties in the senate after
March 3, 1881, as follows:
Senators holding over 29 22
Alrea ly elected 3 3
Certain to be elected 0 10
Total ' 38 35
Leaving; as uncertain and to be de
termined by the close contests Califer
nia, Indiana. Xew Jeresy three. The
democrats are certain to have thirty
eight senators, exactly one-half the
senate,- the republicans to have thirty-live
senat is, and the other three
places ta be heard from. If Indiana
shall in October give Porter even 2,
500 majority, the legislature of that
state" will be republican. Xew Jersey
does not vote until Xovember and that
state will iu all probability not sepa
rate itself from Xew York and Con
necticut, where republican success is
assured. In California there would be
no question as t the election of a re
publican senator were it not for the
mixed condition of local politics, es
pecially on the question of selecting
members of tho legislature. If repub
lican senators shall be elected in these
three states, then the senate after
March"3 1 will be a tie, the vice-president
to be elected having the casting
Humboldt tells us that an Orinoco
Indian, though quite regardless of
bodily comfort, will yet labor a fort
night to purchase pigment wherewith
to make himself auinired; and that
the s line woman who would not hesi
tate to leave her hut without a frag
ment of clothing on -would not dare
to commit such a breach of decorum
aa to go out unpaintcd.
The published returns of the census
bring out several important facts.
They show that the poj ulat on of the
western stales bus incie.ise.t much fas
ter ti.r.n that of ih..- c-.isU m ; thai the
opt; Union of cities has ji;ci ! fis
:tr ihau that of the rur.l disiiic.,
! and Unit the pe rccu. age of in. it.i e iu
i cities has leci, u ith very i w i-.ui-j
lions, iu proportion to thc.r ppinu
t ou when the census was ia..eu.
-r '- - :
;' , w a
s. -s t
xi,r. f , - i i
MPT (PlP'i '
V U 1 VP Jj Q
WE MEAN BUSINESS.
A evr Brand.
One day when trade was dull, a gro
cery clerk procured a piece of sole
leather from a shoemaker, painted it
black and laid it asido for future use.
Within a lew days an old chap from
back in the country came in and in
quired for a plug of chewing-tobacco.
The piece of sole leather was tied up,
paid for, and tho purchaser started for
home. At the end of the sixth day
i he returned, looking downcast and de
i jeeted, and walking into the 6tore lie
inquired lor the clerk.
The clerk was called and came up
i As toon as be cast his eye on the old
man, he recognized at once his shoe
leather customer, and commenced to
, feel quite weak in the knees.
i However lie kept a sober lace and
J awaited develqpmeuts.
j Said-the old man :
' 'Member that terbackcr I got here
the other day '"
"Well, was that a new brand ?"
"Regular terbackcr was it ?"
"Weil, then, it's me. It's right here
in my jaws," eadly replied the old
man. "1 kiiowed 1 was gettin' putty
old, but I was alius handy on bitin'
plug. I never seed a plug afore this
one that 1 couldn't tear to pieces at a
chew. I sot my teeth on this one and
bit and pulled and twisted like a dog
at a root, and I've kept bitin' and pul
liu' for six days, and thar she am now,
the same as the day you sold her to
Seems to be a good plug," remarked
the clerk, as lie smelt of the counter
feit. She's all right; it's me that's fail
in'!" exclaimed the old mau. "Pass
me out tome fine cut, and I'll go
home and deed the farm to the boys
and get ready lor the grave myself."
A novel sciieme A proposition to
Avrite a romance.
An unhappy marriage is like an
electric machine it makes ono dance,
but you can't let go.
"I doirt mean to reflect on you."
said one man to another. "X-," was
the reply, "you're not polisheu enough
to reflect upon anybody."
"AVell ! I should er thought he'd er
taken the old line instead ol the new
one I" exclaimed a Kentucky woman
"when she found her hub-and hanging
in the barn.
A person pretending to have seen a
ghost was asked what the apparition
said to him. "How should I know?''
he replied ; "I am not verse i in the
"Mr. Smithers, how can you sleep?
The sun has been up these two hours."
"Well, what it" it has?'' said Sm.thcrs
"He goes to bed at dark, while I'm up
till after midnight."
A gentleman down East, seeing his
pretty maid with his wife's bonnet
on, kissed her, supposing it to be the
"real one." lie discovered his error
through the assistance of his wife,
A little ten-year-old miss told her
mother the other day that she was
never going to marry, but m ant to
bo a w idow, because widows mv.se.i
in such nice black and always looked
Harboring in Lcadvllle.
Life iu Lcadvillc is full of excito
nicnt even for a barber. The other day
a citizen named Plug strolled into a
barber's establishment where there
were two chairs, both full, and four
teen men waiting. If there is ono
thing that Plug despises, It is waiting
around while a lot of other fellows get
shaved. He figured on how to avoid
it, and espying a friend in one of the
chaii-ij he stepped up to him and spoke
a few words in a low tone. Suddenly
lie became excited. Addressing his
friend he cried : "You third-rate mule
whacker, I'll have your gore!" And
tho friend yelled back, "You greaser,
I 111 shoot you lull ot holes! ' "lean
j shoot first," yelled the plug, drawing
! his revolver." "I'll let you ce you
can't," roared the lriend, leaping lrom
his chair. By this time a scene of
wild excitement was taking place in
the shop. The whole fourteen wait
ing customers were wildly struggling
to get out before the shooting began.
Tlie man iu , tho other chair, without
stopping to' wipe the lather from his
face or remove the apron about him,
leaped from the window upon tho
head of a policeman, who at once ar
rested him for a madman. One of the
barbers had bumped his hoad terribly
and got hi mouth full of dust, crawl
ing under a sofa, and tho other barber
was promptly concealed behind a bar
rel in tlie closet. As soon as the shop
was cleared the two friends stopped
threatening each other, put up their
pisiols and after a hearty laugh coax
ed l he barber to come out and shavo
tliem. I'hu tried to explain to the
head barber that it was all a joke.
But," said tho barber, "voure a
fighting man." "No," said "Plug, "I
am a regular coward and couldn't lick
a Ilea." 'Then by tunkct," yelled tho
barber, "you've driven over $b worth
of trade away from me and I'll take
the value out of your hide!" And he
got in several lusty blows on Plug be
fore the latier-could oiler to settle.
And, somehow, Plug doesn't think it
was such a good joke after all.
captain Acioiplnis (ireeley, com
mnnder of the IIowgatcArctic expedi
tion, is a handsome young Xew Eng
landcr, of Xewburyport, Mas.
The cattle bells in the Ilarz Moun
tains are made so as to harmonize with
A Colorado girl lost a leg, and her
gallant lover had a pocket book made
of a piece of tanned skin from the am
m i 1
Dr. Holland says of Xew England
that tbere is "no oilier spot on the
lace of the earth lhat contains so
much human comfort to the square
It i3 related of Bishop Chase, tho
pioneer Bishop of Ohio and Illinois,
that he was called to baptize a chiid.
The parent-?, who were a little ambi
tious, had selected some august Roman
name, such as Julius Ctesar or Diony
sius Halicarnassus. "When the name
was given the Bishop, who had tl.o
child in Ids arms, said, "Tut, tut, with
your heathen names! Peter, I bap
tize tl.ee," etc., much to the horror of
the parents and the amusement of the
IKop.e, who thought it a fitting re
iuko to pretension.