u r "Jf any man attempts to haul down the Jlmerican Flag, shoot him on the spot. VOL. 5. PLATTSMOUTII, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, JUiE 3, 18G9. x0 9. 1 . THE HERALD IS PUBLISHED WEEKLY, ,, II. D. HATHAWAY, EDITOR AN D PROPfllclTORi V5"0(Bc corner Main street and Levee, second terv. Terms: $2.50 per annum. Rates of Jldcerttsing ii ulnars (space often lines) one insertion, $1 .SO Ke.i cabte itent insertion - - l.l'O Pti:fe t tl ctrds not exceeding six 11 10 00 O te-quarter column or less, per annum 35.00 six months . 20 0 three months 15.00 t . half column twelve months 60.00 " six months 86.00 " three months 20.00 tJ se column twelve months - 100.00 six months - - - 60.00 three months - - .00 tlHransient advertisements mast be p orln dvaace. &r We are pnpared to do all kinds of Work n .tort notice, and in a style that will satis, faclcn. WILLITT POTTENGER. ATTOUNEY AT LAW, PLATTSMOUTII - - NEBRASKA. T. .Tl SIA.RqiJETT. ATTORNEY AT LAW Solicitor in Chancery. PLAT TSMOUTII, NEBRASKA S. F- COOPER. ATTORNEY ASD COCXSElOt AT Z Plaff smoiitli, Nel. "Will buy and sell Real Estaf, and pay taxes fjr W non-residents. Iraprov-d and u-iin-proved lands and lots for sale, jBie 25ih nl2rl. J V. RIWIjWS, iti i., PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON, (Late a Surjjeoa-in Cbier of the Army of the Poto rauc.) PLATTSMOUTII, - - Oilc" with or. U R. Livingston, on NEB. Main street, cp" tot oar i noose. tvme reidnce eornr ot HJCimnmu tresis two door outh of P. P. a .. nuytt. R. H LIVINGSTON, M. D. Physician and SuTgeon, Tj-iJars his professional services to lit citis'-ns of ,coilntv. , . .U.mlenee souh-ei.t eornr ofak and Sixth OTlce on M iln street, opieit.- Court House, f-1 1. timnuth, Nebraska. Platte Valley House Ed. B. Murphy, Proprietor. turner of Miin and Fourth Streets, riiitlsmnnihi Nel. This IIou-! hvi"g bs-n r tilted and newly fur-irst-cUsi accommodations. Board by as 'Uy or wek. S29 EI. S. JEXXIXGS, ATTORNEY AT LAW AVD G-3H3ralTjaad Agent, Lincoln. - -. - Nebraska. ix-.ll n'actlce ia any of the Courts of the State, and wi'lbuyand a -ll Keal M ate on Txe, examine Titles, c. aov-irt'titif H. MAXWELL SAM. M. CHAPMAN Maxwell & Chapman, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, AVD Solicitors in Chancery. LATTSX0UTU, - X KB It A SKA Oflce over Black, Buttery k tVs Deng Store. l-rl - Plattsmouth Mills. C. IIEISEL, Proprietor. Have r. cently been repaired and placed ,n thor- o.inti running order, uusiom 100,000 Dusliels of Wheat ? n.i-iv ror which the big est marke fiice wiil be paid. J. N. WISE, aug2b tl ir,rl TAfr. Accident, l ire. Inland and Transit INSURANCE AGENT Will take rieksat reasonable ratos in the most reliabl m .inaaies in the U nited States. CCT 3me" the book store.PlaU.ir UltUinery & Dressmaking, ST Miss A.M. DXSPAIS MM. R. P. KHaJT Opposite the City Bakery. . i ... r-t ri.l i announce to the Ladiea V 11 .".r '":.".V . .Te.n.tv. that we havejusi , ..'clived a large and ; w.lf . :oJ : Wtuter KIUB our or ns order. Perfecnatasfaction given or nocharges, my'tf k, u ..ii i , njn ol wora iu HEALTHt COMFORT AND economy. 3 REASONS FOR BOARDING with GEO. W. COIA IIV, . a,. BTRPET PLATTSMOUTH Two blocks northwest of Brick School-Uouse. TTE has a BA Til HOUSE, free to patrong ; bis rooms are well ventilated, ana nil i prices are asonable. lJ uijio n.on. Capt. D. LACOO & CO., Wholesaleand Retail Dealers in Wines and Liquors, Also a very cho'ce selection of Tobacco and Cigars, Main street, second door east of Seymour House, i'i (aCir. Xeb'aika Ara lust r-ceivinir a new stock of Genuine Old towbo direet f rem Bearbea eoaaly, Ky., Bitters, i:.miI. e insis.iuit ol riosrers, V 1 W: ffc";:,T.V. W. e -eeommodit. all . - u'. iii uiiitbp cbenwsi k old' . J win f Dr. J. W. THOMAS. Having permanently located at WEEPING WATER FALLS tender his professional serTices to thj cilizens ol Cats couDty, Nebraska. Jan7'60lf NOTICE. JAMES O'NEIL Is my authorized Agent for the collection of all accounts due the undersigned for medical services; bis receipt will te valid for the payment of any monies on said accounts. Auut 14. Ib67. K. K. LIVINGSTON, M.D IVH'ULSdLo.lVLus; lc! PIANOS, ORG.AIN3. 91ELOD E O IV S ! I am agf-nt for the best Music I Instruments made. Persons wishing to buy Pianos, Cabinet, M-tro-Dolitan or Portable Oiprans, or Melodecns can pur chase through my agency on as liberal terms as they can from the indnufa.tuiers themselves. All Instru ments fully warranted. J. N. WISE, aprilltf FOR SALE OR TRADE! A good dwellirg, containing six rocms, a rood celiar, and cittern, a well, stable, woodshed and buggj shed on the lot, situate on the corner f Seventh and Locust streets ; al-o. a two story brick building, U3x3t, with two lots, situate on Fifth street nonh of .Main. The above property will be sold cheap for cash, or traded for an improved farm in Caxs county. For particulars apply on the premises. Gto. B0ECK. All perrons indebted to me are requested to call and settle immediately, as I must and will have them settled forthwith. NovlOtf. GEO. B0ECK. MILLINERY. MRS J- F- DOUD, Having just rereivi d a rhoico selection of Millin ery Goods rum Philadelphia, now offers them for inspection SLd sale, at reasonable prices. Mo pains has been spared to obtain the finest material and latost styles. Please eel I ard f Xf mil g at bei residence, one and half miles tooth of i'laitf mouth. ma i26tf WOOL. WORTH & 00., BOOKSELLERS. STATIONERS, Binders 2: Paperdcalers. SAIJVT JOSEPH, MO. oc256m To thi Wobxiso CLAsa: I am now prepared to lurnih all clae with coitnt employment at their homes, the whols of the tmif, or tor the xjiB'e moinentn. Business new, liht and profitable persons or either sex, and the boys a oil girls earn nearly as mneh as men. Orent inducements are of fered "those who win devote their whole time to the btifine s; and, th every person who sees this no tice, may send me tlieir address and lest the business for ibmfclves,l make the following unparalleled Fifty cents to 5 per evening. Is easily earue.i oy olTr : To ail who are not well sati-fied with the bn-ia-):-., I will send tl to pay for the trouble of writing- tie Full paiticciars, directions, ate, sect free, teainple sent by ni;l lor iocs. Auuress aprS C. ALLt., aosumb, mc. LIVERY, PEED, Sale StaTole, -Br- WM- J- HYATT, Pr9Vrielort PLATT8M 0CTH, NEBRASLA. First-rate Stabling and Wagon Tarda for the ac commodation of the pol lie, also a good stock of HORSES AND CARRIAGES to let on very reasonablejterms. Stable on Main street, ncay opposite the SHER DAN HOUSE, Plattsmouth, Xeb. Dec31tf. SHANNON'S Feed. Sale and Livery STABLE. Main St., - - Plattsmouth I 'am prepared to accommodate the public wtt Horses, Carriages and Buggies, Also, a nice Hearse, On short notice and reasonable terms. A Hack will run to steamboat landing, and to all parts of the city when desired. mr29 J. W. SUANNOJf. DR lYI- II. ilTCIXSKIT, DENTIST, Will be at Dr. Livingston'! Office during tneliast k in each month. Al orders lett m ins post- office will prompily.atten.ded to. Julys. NEW TOBACCO STORE! ON MAIN STREET, OPPOSITE COUKT HO0SK, PLATTS3I OUT II, WE B., We nave on hand a large assortment of CIGARS & TOBACCO, Consisting of.the best qualities of CIGARS, TINE CUT, PLUG AND M OKING TOBACCO, i. 1 o-relnsivrlv in Tobacco we can sell at chesp.it not cheaper than any other store in the city. Give us a cull before you purrhase elsewhere, as we know yon will go awsy eati'fled. , 1j. liltUJJL G tU., February 11, lS69tf. B. Spcrlock, k, BlITtS Wikdhis Co. Clerk and Kecoraer, Dept'x Clerk A Rec'r. Spurlock 8c Windham, PL A TTSJTO CTH, XEBliASKA . FRONT ROOMS OF COURT-HOUSE, Clerk and Treasurer's Office. LANDS BOUGHT &. SOLD. Titles Examined, and Conveyances Made, Taxes paid and receipts forwarde . - V Sr.-- JO promptly. Flatteaontb, June 1S.136S nil. T11COR1S OF AURORAS. The Pular Light is a light which is frequently seen near the horizon, bear ing some resemblance to the morning twilight, whence it has received the name of'aurura. Id the hemisphere it is usually termed "aurora borealis," because it is chiefly seen in the north. A fiaiilar phenomenoo is also seen in the southern hemisphere, where it is called "Aurora Ausirali.-." Each of them may, with greater propriety, be called 'Aurora Polaris ,' or Polar Light. They exhibit an endless va neiy of appearances. In the United States an aurora is uniformly preceded t oy a nazy or slaty appearance ot ine bky, (inrticularly in the neighborhood of the northern horizon. When the auroral display commences, this hazy portion of toe sky assumes the form of a dark bank or segment of a circle in the north, rising ordinarily to the height of from five to ten degrees. This dark segment is not a cloud, for the stars are seen through it as through a smcky atmosphere, with little diminu tion ol brilliancy, inis dark bank: is simply a dense haze, and it appears darker trom the contrast with the lu minous arc which rests upon it. In high northern latitudes, when the au rora covers the entire heavens, the whole sky seems filled with a dense haze; and in still higher latitudes, when; the aurora is sometimes seen in the south, this dark segment is ob served resting on the southern horizon and bordered by the auroral light. Auroras are somerimes observed si multaneou.-ly over large portions of the globe. The aurora of August 23, 1859, was seen throughout more than 140 degrees of longitude, from Eastern Europe to California ; and trom Ja maica on the south to an unknown dis tance in British America on the north. The aurora of September 2. 18-59, was seen at the Sand wich Islands ; it was seen throughout the whole of North America and Europe, and the dis turbance of the magnetic needle indi-. cated itspresence throughout all North ern Aia. although the sky was over cast, so that at many places it could not be seen. An aurora was seen at he same time in South America and New Holland. The aurcras of Sep tember 25, 1S41, and November 17, S4S, were a'most equally extensive. The height of a large number of auroras has been computed, and the average result for the upper limit of the streamers is 450 miles. From a multitude of observations it is concluded that tb aurora seldom appears at an evasion less than about 45 miles above the earth's surface, and that it frequently extends upward to an ele vation of 500 miles. Auroral arches having a well denned border are gen erally less than 100 miles in height. Auroras are very unequally dis tributed over the earth's surface. They occur most frequently in the higher atitudes, and are almost unknown within the tropics. At Havana, in atitude 23 degrees, but six auroras have been recorded within .a hundred years, and south or Havana auroras are still more infrequent. As we travel northward from Cuba, auroras increase ia frequency and brilliancy; they rise higher in the heavens, and eftener ascend to the zenith. Near the parallel f 40 degrees we find on an average only ten auroras annually. Near the parallel of 42 degrees the average number is twenty annually; near 45 degrees the number is forty; and near the parallel of 50 degrees it amounts to eighty annually. Between inis point auu tue parauei ot ue- grees auroras, during the winter, are seen almost every night. They appear uiii iu mts ucaveustf miu us uiieu iu the south ns the north. In regions further north thev are seldom seen excert in the south, and from this noint they diminish in frequency and bnl- iancv as we advance toward the pole, - - Beyond latitude 62 decrees the aver- age number of auroras is reduced to forty annually. Beyond latitude 67 decrees it ia ieduced to twenty, and near lati ude 78 decrees it w t educed . . . . . to ten annually. Auroral exhibitions take place in the upper regions of the atmosphere, since hey partake of the earths rota tion. All the celestial bodies have an apparent motion from east to west, arising from the rotation of the earth ; but bodies belonging to the earth, in eluding the atmosphere and the clouds which nam in it. partake of the earth s rotation, so that their relative position is not affected by it. 1 he same is true of auroral exhibitions. Whenever an auroral corona is formed, it maintains sensibly the some position in the heav ens during the whole period of its con tinnance, although the stars mean wbiUe revolve at the rate of 15 degrees per minute. The grosser part of the earth s at mosphere is limited to a moderate dis tance from the earth. At the height of a little over four miles, the density of the nir is only one-half what it is at the eanh's surface. At the height 50 miles the atmosphere is well-nigh inappreciable in its effect upon twi litrhL The phenomena of lunar eclipses indicate an appreciable atmos Dhere at the height of 66 miles. The phenomena of shooting-stars indicates an atmosphere at the height of 200 300 mile, while the aurora indicates that the atmosphere does not entirely cease at the height of oOO miles. Au roralexhibitious take place, therefore, in an aimospher of extreme rarity ; so rare indeed that if, in experiments with an air-pump, we could exhaust the air as completely, we would say that we had obtained a perfect vacu um. The auroral beams are simply spa ces which are illuminated by the flow of electricity through the upper regions of the atmosphere. Durinsr the auro ras of 1859 these beams were nearly 500 miles in length, and the lower ex tremities were elevated about 45 miles above the earth's surface. Their tops inclined toward the south, about 17 de grees in the neighborhood of New York, this being the position which the dipping-needle there assume. Professor Loomis, in Harpers Jtfaga zine. OLD OltCAD A curious discovery has just been made at Pompeii. In u house in course of excavation, an oven was found closed with an iron door, on opening which a batch of eighty one lonves, put in nearly 1S00 years ago, and now somewhat overbaked, was discovered, and even the large iron shovel with which they were neatly laid in rows. The loaves were but slightly over baked by the lava heat, having been protected ly a quantity ef ashes cover ing the door. There is no baker's mark on the loaves; they are circular, about nine inches in diameter, rather flit, and indented(evidenlly by the ba- bers elbowj in the center, ana are slightly raided at the'sides; and divid ed by deep lines, radiating form the center in eight segiments. They are now of a deep brown color, and hard but very light. In the same shop tvor fniinrl hrnn7fi nnd ftil silvrt" . t- I coins. A him witn a great quantity or corn in excellent preservation, has also hoon liwravprpi Science antX Fun Combined. The Brunswick (Me.) Telegraph tells a bit of fun perpetrated by a 6tu dent attending a lecture of Professor Brackett, at Bowdoin College. The object was to show the reaction of sul phuretted hydrogpn. A member of the class had sketched with acetate of lead two scenes. The moment a jet of gas w:is applied, the gas acting upon the lead, darkened and brought out the outlices. The first represented an old monk with bis crucibles, in search of the Philosopher's stone, with the devil standing over him and gloat ing over the prospect of getting him at last. The second scene represented the monk leering and laughing as if he would burst his cheeks, and the devil with a most disgusting look hold ing his nose. The monk had devel oped some sulphuretted hydrogen, and this was too much for his batanic Maj esty. The sketches were admirably drawn, and the chemical point will not soon be forgotton. Moon Photoghaphs. A writer to one or ine XNew xork daily papers eays : "A few evenings since, in pass ing a water trough which stood under a young elm, I noticed the moon be ing full that the shadow of 'the tree was thrown upon the water. The next morning the trough was slightly frozen over, but beho'd there was a perfect photograph of the drooping branches of the beautiful elm. Can you tell me how this was done ? Has hbe moon gone into the photograph business, ana nas it been engaged id that business for a long time past, - j6uicu unuo nests of iron, which are now used ex tensively for sparrows. They are at tached to the limb of a tree by a screw, -l .. ,1 are ventilated trom toe bottom, and are -I quite ornamental ; sparrows, martins quite ornamental ; sparrows, martins od swallows lake readily to them, iney are manuracturea in rsoaton.ana the authorities of that city have bought They are manufactured in Boston, and them by the hundred, to be attached .i. - j, to me trees in me squares ana streets. The Philadelphia Press having dared Mrs. Cady Stanion to tell her age, ih.i i.,,.iin. j -r r J - ' Stanton was 53 the 12th day of last November. She believes she neither paints nor dyes, nor cares to be con sidered one hour younger than she is. Moreover, she allows Mr. Stanton the greatest latitude in thought, word and action, even to being a great Repub lican and advocate of the fifteenth amendment." The English steam plows are at tracting considerable attention on the continent. A steam plowing company has been formed at Moulin. Several landed proprietors have recently pur chased the fowler plow. A machine has been invented and put in operation in California, which, it is said, has cut, threshed, cleaned and sacked the wheat from twenty of acres in ten hours, with only three I men to work it. At a recent sale ot autograpns in London, a letter written by Daniel Defoe, the author of "Robinson Cru soe," and one of John Dryden, pro or I duced one hundred and fifty dollars. MISCELLANEOUS. Gideon Welles has returned to the sweet quiet of Hartford. Meonlisht baptisms are becoming popular in Indiana. A great base ball tournament will be held in Syracuse in June. There was a severe hail storm in the region of Memphis on the night of the 5ih. Savannah, Ga, now has a popula tion of 4U.UUU being an increase of about 10,000 since the close of the war. Pio Nino has quarreled with the Rothschilds, and they declare they will lend the Holy Father no more money. England contains 23.000.000 inhab itants; its land is owned by 50,000 peo ple It has 1,000,000 more women than men. The njmber of children of school age iti the State of Ohio is 1,019.192, only rbout 5 9 of whom are regular at tendants. Bridgeport, Conn., has received an order from the Spanish Government for the manufacture of 10,000,000 me tallic cartridges. In March there was an arrival of 1.000 water mellons, 4 000 coacoa nuts and 400 bunches of bananas, at San prancisco, from the Sandwich Is lands. South Carolina is soon to hold an Agricultural Convention, at which an endeavor will be made to form county societies to import white labor. A whale foriy feet longf, yielding 869 gallons of pure oil and more than four hundred pounds of whale bone, was taken near Cape Lookout. North Carolina, about two weeks since. The New York street commissioner li.B nrnhiKitfifl 1K0 nnlino in snv nnri i" .rr . ," . Pf lne Clly meaicinai DanuDiiis, or i i : 1 1 - - . e . i t AH OIIISJ K'V't'K liuuue ui lue sate ui ex posure tor sale or any nostrum or meu- cine. Northern rapntl having been suc cessfully invoked, the Richmond steel worUs are being rebuilt, and wil be applied with new and improved ma chinery, lhey are expecteu to reopen next mon.h. Among the incidents of the late storm in St. Louis, was the return of a sportsman with five dozen snipe which he found killed by the hail. A pigeon was brought pown in the city by hail stones A lad of fifteen in Pitisburgh.bought liquor in four saloons on Sunday of last week, and on Monday lodged informa tion against the dealers tor selling li quor on the Sabbath, and received 8100 as the informers fee. A down east giil being bantered one day by some of her female friends in regard to her lover, who bad the misfortune to have but one leg.replied Pooh. I wouldnt have a man with in U itg a 1 u v j a v uw v is a a in wu itrn lanrcj I rianVo t rr mm m r r One of the negro ministrels at Mo zart Hall declared last Bight that every dog- must have his day A logical youth in the gallery, thinking that he saw in the old saw an mconsistancy cried out that there wete more dogs than days, At Fort Preble, Portland, Maine, some workmen, while removing rub bish from the old brick barracks, found, tied up in a handkerchief S3, 000 in bills all in the denominations of fives on the Frankfort bank of Maine. This bank failed several years since At Talladega, Ala., a school teach er recently sentenced a negro girl, one of his pupils, to ten di ys cooking pt his private residence, for a violation of the rules of his school. His pupils I are rather reiractory ana ne manages m - 1. II I to get an nis nouse worK aone oy them, Tfae Da7erjports are exhibiting in Boston. The other night the Warden of the State Prison was one of the committee appoiuted to tie the broth ers: ana proaucea some nanacuns , , , i j rr wl!n w.nicn lasien mem, out tney refused to allow the bracelets to be used. The other day a large Norway rat attacked a brood of chickens at Barnes ville. Ohio. The mother hen at once came to their rescue, and fought so gallantly that she killed the rat in a few minutes, she managed to seize him with her claws, and holding him down pecked at his head until he gave up tbe ghost. Commend me to the Christian who when the Sabbath bell rings, consults his consciecce rather than bis barom ter. Commend me to the follower of Jesus who chooses death or defeat rather than desertion. Commend me to him who, when duty sounds he trumpet, is always ready to answer, Lord ! what wilt Thou have me to do!" He is Christ's minute-man. A smoking bishop dined with Ad miral Farragut once upon a time, an after tbe dessert tendered a bunch Havanas to the sailor, with the invita tion, "Have a cigar. Admiral?" "No, Bishop," said the Admiral, with a quizzical glance, "I don't smoke I swear a little sometimes." HOW IS THIS t Some don't think it worth while to advertise. They think there is no vir tue in primer's ink, and therefore dis card it. An Iowa man wanted to find out something in St. Louis, and wrote to the Democrat as follows : A few days since I enclosed you one dollar, with a request that you forward to me the daily to that amount. My object in sending for your paper was, most particularly, to obtain the business of some of your jobbing gro cery men. , The paper is at band, but lo and behold ! I cannot find the busi ness card of a wholesale grocery houso in it! Will you be kind encugh to inform me whether you have any gro cery houses in your city that sell iu jobbing lots tu merchants in the interior and up river towns and villages? If so, can they furnish to small dealers at as good rates as Chicago merchants ? If the answer is yes, how can we little folks find out who they are and how to order goods from them ? for I con fess to belong to the class of very small dealers that have not much, and don't know much, and have taken very little interest in meddling with other people's business. But you must ex cuse me a little when I tell you that Chicago merchants have been very clever in sending us circulars setting forth what they are doing, and writing us letters about selling us goods, letting us know what they have to sell, and the prices, and there is hardly a day but some of them call to see us and solicit orders. Now, as you propose to make St. Louis our grain market, we would like to buy some goods where we sell our grain, provided your mer chants can sell as cheap as Chicago. A MAN OF ."VEUVE. A Washington letter-writer remarks of Mr. Greeley that "the control he has of his countenance is nearer what is related of Talleyrand than any roan we wot of it being said of the latter that if any man were to kick him be hind a man in front could not tell from the expression of his face that any thing unusual was occurring. This reminds a correspondent of an incident that occurred in Omaha : A gentleman who had received an insulting missive determined to resent it promptly. Next day, thi.ikii-g he saw his man ahead, he hastily overtook him and adminis tered several pedal salutations. The kickee remaining passive, the kicker went round in front to see the effect. and discovered to his regret that he had kicked the wrong man. He apolo gized, and was answered: 'Don't mention it. From the fre quency of such little episodes in my experience I was sensible of your de monstration, but was not aware you had made any mistake." At which little M , of the Omaha Herald, admiringly remarked. "Ob, hasn't he aot the nerve!"' Drawer, Harper's Magazine. BETROTIIIIYG. A curious mode of betrothing was ractised at a certain Scottish fair, long ince discontinued. It was the custom for the unmarried persons of both sexes to choose a companion, according to their liking, with whom they were to live until the recurrence of the fair the following year. This was called hand-fastening, or hand-in fist. If the parties hus oddly betrothed continued pleased with each other for the time pecified. they than remained together as man and wife for life. If, however. either party was dissatisfied, they sep arated, and both were free to make another choice as at first. The fruit of this periods of probation (if 'any) was always attacned to the disanected person bd equitable provision. But our authority is silent as to the dispo sition of the fruit if bjth parties- wer disaffected. medical Properties of Celery. A correj poodent of the Practical Farmer writes : I have known many men anf women too, who from various causes had become so much affected with nervousness that when they stretched out their hands they shook ike aspen leaves on windy days and by a daily moderate use of the blanch ed foot s.alks of celery leaves as a salad they became as stroDg and steady in limbs as other people. I have known others so very nervous mat tne least annoyance put them in a state of agitation, and they were al most in constant perplexity and fear. who were also effectually cured by a daily moderate use of blanched celery as a salad at meal times. I have known others cured by using celery for palpitation of the heart. Every body engaged in labor weakening to the nerves should use celery daily in season, and onions in its stead when not in season. A physician tiassing by a stone ma son biwled out to him, "Good morning Mr. V ; hard at work I see, you finish your grave stone as far as "in memory of and then you wait, I sup pose, to see who wants a monument next." "Why, yes," replied the old man, resting for a moment on his inal let, "unless somebody else is tick, and you are doctoring them, and then keep right on. WIT AND HL'IOIt. There was a boy who had been told that he was dust, i nd who wachided for getting muddy. "If I arn dust." said he, "how can I help being muddy when it rains ?'' Ladies don't know whether they like smoking ir not. With special favor, ites they like it; with general favor ites they don't dislike it, and with no favorites they detest it. A shrewd old gentleman once said to bis daughter. "Be sure, rry dear, you never marry a poor man ; but tbe poorest man in the world is one that has money and nothing else." An American lady in Paris was out of all patience and spirits at hearing nothing but French day after day. One morning she heard a cock crow ing, and exclaimed, "Thank God, there's one that speaks English. A young lady at Troy, while en gaged in conversation with a gentle man a few days since, spoke of having resided in St. Louis. "Was Si. Louis your native place?" inquired the gen tleman. "Well, yes part of the time, t responded the lady. A ruminative individual, hearing for the first time the quotation, "All be World's a Stage" expressed his lack of wonder at. accidents being of daily occurrence among the passen gers, as the stage turned over every 24 hours. , A chap from the country, stopping at one of the hotels sat down to dinner. Upon the bill of fare being banded to him by the waiter, be remarked that he didn't "care 'bout reading now he'd wait till after dinner." A gentleman on circuit narrating to Lord Norbury some extravagant feat in sporting, mentioned that be had lately shot 33 hares before breakfast. Thirty three hairs ! ' exclaimed Lord Norbury; "zounds, sir, then you must have been firing at a wig. "I will bet you a bottle of wine," said a gentleman to bis friend, "that you will come down out of that chair tefore I ask you twice." "Done! ' replied the fnend. Come down!" cried the fther. "I will not," said his friend, with much obstinacy. "Ihen stop till I ask you a second lime," said the other. Perceiving that he would never bo asked a second time, the gentleman in the chair came down in a double sense. There was a little daughter whose mother called her attention to a word in a book, and asked her what it was. "Why, don't you know ?' asked the gin. "Yes," said the mother, "but I wish to find out if you know' "Well," responded the child, "I do know." "Tell me then, if you ples6fe," said the lady. "Why, no," said the little miss archly, "you know what ii is, and there's no need of saying anything more about it." An Irishman made a suddeu rush into a druggist's shop, took from his pocket a scda water bottle filled with some liquor and, handing it across the counter, exclaimed, "There, doctor, snuff that, will you ?" The "doctor" did, and pronounced the liquor to be genuine whisky. "Thank you. doc tor," said the Irishman ; "hand it to me nga'n if you please." The doctor again did as directed, and asked what he meant. "Oth, thin, said Pat, "if yoti will have it, tbe priest told me not to drink any of this unless I got it from the doctor !" When a man and woman are made one by a clergyman, the question is. which is the one? Sometimes there m loog Htruggle between them before this matter is settled. It was an apt answer of a young ady who being asked where was her native place, replied : "I have none; I am tbe daughter of a Methodist min ister." Employment so certainly produces cheerfulness," says Bishop Hall, "ihat have known a man come home in high spirits from a funeral, because he had the managemert of it.' Cork trees nre being successfully cultivated in South Florida. It is raid that Adelija Paiii is called Diva because she is a duck of a nrl. Step are being taken to introduce the cultivation of the olive in Louisi ana. It is proposed in Canada to make the 1st of July, "Dominion Day," a le gal holiday. A Mr. Scalf, residing in Elkhart county. Ind., is 105 years old. His eldest living eon is 70. An Indiana couple, divorced about a month ago.have made up end remar ried. Eugenie and eon will be present at the inauguration of th Suez Canal next fall. 1 hi era. myiu.w