Nebraska Newspapers

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" my mYn attempt to haul down the Jlmerican Flag, shoot him on the spot."
VOL. 4. PLTTSM()Uril, NUBHASKA, T11UKDAY, APRIL 10. 1868. KO 2.
'A
n
14
ft
THE HERALD
IS PCBLISUKD
WE EKLY,
Br
t. TJ. HATHAWAY,
EDITOR AND PROPRIETOR.
ffOae, owner Mala street and LrH, ascend
estf.
Terras: $2.50 per annum.
Rates of Advertising
aeaa,aare (space of tea lla) onm Insertion, $1 30
Cci ataeni insertion - l.n
r r.f-l-tial card aot exceediec six II 10 oe
f-e,aerir eoiama ericas, per annum 35 0
' ' aiz month SU.eO
" terra mental IS 00
half olaa twalr aiootha (0.00
" aia moots SS.00
' three asoatha 10. Oo
ituUai telT raoitki - 104). 00
eix month 0.00
thru month - - .00
ell transient adrerli-satat mast bap aria
ed'aore
M-f We ara prepared ta do all kind of Work
aa snort notice, and ia a jtjl thai wttl satis
fiction.
WILLITT P0TTENQ
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
PLATTSMOUTIT - - NEBRASKA.
T. !TI M It ft U ETT.
ATTORNEY AT LAW
Awn
Solicitor ia Chancery
FLAT rSMODTII, - - NEBRASKA
R. R LIVINGSTON, M. D.
Physician and Surgeon,
T'4 a his professional service to the citiiena cf
Cat rwi.
srKe.tdenee eru?h-esst eorr.ar ofVak and .Vizth
t'rrtiM, oce on Kim iKtat, opposite Court Uuuic,
ristlamonih, Nebraska.
Piatte Valley House
Ed. B. Murphy, Proprietor.
Corner of .V.rtn and Fourth Streets,
I:attiuoulh. Neb.
TV.s House riaviTif been re Ilted and nrwlT fur
lliiid "f ri fl,l est ascimon-dalioat. ttosid
tha or t. rutii
!. MAXWELL. SAM M CHAPMAN
Maxwell Sc Chapman,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW,
AKD j
Solicitors in Chancery.
rtATTSUUVTU. - St.BtlASKA.
Olri vver Dlsck, Bcttsrv k Cos Drug tcr.
aarl
CLASKE, PORTER & ERWIN,
ATTOKXEYS AT LAW,
ATid Solicitors in Chancery,
MA t.Y M T. , ori'OSITX THE CO VR T 110 L'iS
I'LATTSMOUTII, NEII.
aiTiita j c la as a, moiit roiiii,
wm w.
XV KSAl MJTA 7a A'7.VCT
.'a4 wtf
JOSEPH SCnLATER,
WATC7MAKEB and JEWELER,
m:. Stiiit,
TLATTSMOUTII, - NEBRASKA
A g: i aioitain cf 'A'atch C1i h old Pen
J.welry, isilrar Ware, Fane -oo . Violin and Vi-
Ma Trimming alwT un hand. AUwora com
aai:taJ to hi care aiil b warranted.
April 10, IS:5.
iRiai. ct wivn & caoxroa.
Xa.' 3t.p t JnUian Afrxiri. "AUorneyi at Lute
IRISn, CALHOUN &CF.0XT0N.
The above namrd r-nt!tnrn have aaiociated
tktmelfr in bunr.ru to. the purpo of (.r ji-ecut-lg
and cilaciing all claims aniot (he (.riicral
ireraiuent, or aaint any tribe of Indian, and
ar prrpared to iiro.-ocntc nrh claim, either before
Dgre, or tir of the Department of tioeernmenl
er before iheCourt of Claim.
Ma lai. R will .leeote hi pciaonal attention to
t io'.nfi. at Washington.
OTe- at ejraka C-'ty, corner af Main aad
Sitlh trt.
National Claim Agency.
WASHINGTON- D- C-
F. M. DORRINGTON,
SUB AGENT:,
T "TSMOUTII, - - NEBRASKA,
. -epired tt prnt and prc.wn!e claim before
a. -re. Court of Claim and the Dep (nirnta. I'a
f m: Prnion.. Bount e, and Bounty Lami
a '!. tW CturM nio'leraw. and in proportion U
taeaiaiu t of the claim. V. M. DOKK1NOTO
April 10. '5
J. N. WISE,
G rural Life, Accident, Fire, Inland and
Transit
INSURANCE AGENT
Will take rik at reason able raf'S in the oot reliabl
e .panlee in the I'mt- i Siair
f J-Oifice at tae book store, Pla tr cnth, Sebrat
. oiayllltf
ITIillinery Sc Dressmaking,
"it Mm A. M . DEfrau A Ma. . p. KaRaiDV
Opjmsite the City Dakrry.
Cl? I would rfupectrully annouuee to the Ladie
of Plaitsmuu'.h and vicinity, that we havejnsl
"recrierJ a Isre and well selected stuck of Winter
"SvxkI, Momi.iiiii i f Flower. Kibbuns, eirt, die
rr'niminr. Ac.. Ac. We will el the cheapest fv
ever sold in (hi ci y We can iccotninmlaic all our
Id customer nJ a many new c-ne a will aor us
with a call. All kinds uf work In oar line done to
wrtfer Pefc-t satasfaction given or oo charges
my:f
BOOKS I STAT. QUERY.
Bock. School Books, Kewspaprra. Uagazines,
eriudicals, and all kinds or Stationery, at
MURPHY'S BOOK-STORE,
re-Bee Buildiar, Main lUeet. et21
II. S. JEXXIXGS,
ATTORNEY AT LAW
AID.
General Land Agent,
Lincoln. ... Aebraka.
Will practice la any of the Conrta of the Mare an
Jill key and aeil Real on evsnueelon, pay
xvn. j. ford,
UPHOLSTERER,
PAPER-HANGER. &.C
Main street, - - Opposite Post Office,
Will knp on hand and make to order, Mattrete,
i itium i riucK, win ouaues, v an rai'er, me.
gW All kii.ds of Turning executed ia gojd style.
Oov 7 B7. nl
SHANNON'S
Feed, Sale and Livery
STABLE.
Main St., Plattsmodtd
I am prepared to accommodate the public wtt
Horses, Carriages and Buggies,
Alio, a nice Hearse,
On hort notice and reasonable term. A Hack will
run to steamboat latujii.g. and to all carts of lha
city wnm aesirea.
J. W. SUAXN0V
W. D. GAGE. W. R. DAVIS.
CENTRAL STORE.
Dry-Coods,
Groceries,
Provisions,
BOOTS and SHOES,
Ma in Street, two doors above Fourth.
Where the public fifty find
THE BEST OF GOODS,
and prices as low a can be f und in the e ty.
We return fhanks for the liberwl patronage w
have rec-ived. and hope to merit ii continuaiire.
Oct. 3, '67 OiGEUAVIS.
ILLC0X&
SEWING
rrjJIBBS
The Champion
1 1 1 1 of 136 first pro-
miams in two
II 1 1 masons.
i ii
asons.
rongtr and
" Its seam is
V! J ti
lets liable to rip than the Lock Stitch."-
Vi(7e' Report of the Grand Trtal."
Send for the ' Report," and Samplee of
work, containing both kinds of stitches on
the same piece of goods. Agents wanted.
L. CORNELL CO., Gen'l Agents,
138 Lake Bt., Chicago.
F. LIT '
decllyl Aceut. f tuimtiuir., X-k
F AIRBANK'S
SCALES,
or ili aisns-
Fairbanks, Oreecleaf
& Co-.
220 A 2 l.-itrSt. Chicago
M irket St , St. Louis
tjrr careful to boy only the ficnuine. my2i
J. W. JENNINGS,
AYOCA, CASS COLWTY
(Jenningi k DiU'i Flour and Wool MilU.)
Dra'er in
Dry.Goods,
Groceries,
Hats and Caps,
Boots and shoes,
Hardware
And such articles as tire
adapted to a Farming
Community.
WE WILL SELL CUE A I AS AS Y,
Or exchange for Produce.
We t ay the IHGI1EST MARKET PRICE
for jf in of all kinds or take ia exchange fr gooda
ft b6m3
nncLLi.(;s ar all price
Any pervn wishing to purchase Farm-property, or
Residence in town will end them for sale at al
prices. By
IDORRTJTGTOK,
my- Ral KarATa tonrr.
G It. McCALLUM,
Manuf ctnrerofand dealer in
S:i1IIcm and Harness,
Of eeery decrltion, wholcalr and retail. Jfo 130
Main street, between 5th and 6ib streets, NebraKka
City. jel
IN'OTICE.
JAME3 O'KF.IL ia my authorised A cent for the
colle ction of all account dn the onderin-d for
medical cerTices: hie recent will be valid for the
payment or any monies on said ce.unt-
Aicti-tl4. IS67. K. K. LIVINGSTON, II. D.
Weeping Water Mills.
Farmer, co whTf you can get the
best Flour and the most of it.
S3 lbs X X Z FLOUIf an-i 1J lbs tf Bit A3
given in exchange for good Wheat.
We are also doing grin work; and, with onr in
errand facilities, fee VtuH that we ran give the
bttl and the most flonr of any mill in the Stte.
Satisfaction Guaranteed
PRODUCE UOVGUT AM) SOLD.
HIGHEST MARKET "'RICK PAID.
REED & CLINTON.
March t!h, 188.
THOMAS W. SHRYOCK,
CABINET MAKER,
AA V UEALH.lt jy
Furniture and Chairs.
THIkO fTRKET. (Sear Main.)
PLA TTSMO UTH. JVE BRJ1SKJI.
OTaaeraU aucaded at tn aher'.eti sotica.'
N
uu
From the Toledo BUde.
."V I SHY.
The wYew Ilampxhitr. Election The
Preparations for the pr ocession which
did not Take Place,
Waiuirios D C .
March 13, 1S6S
Probly the happiest party wich ever
a?.-eml led in (hit wale ur leers, wuz n
the White House, on the night uv ihe
eleckhun in Noo Hamp-heer. It wuz
a gay and festive seen. Hilarity
rained. The President, with a unwon
ted smile onto his face, his nose shinia
with a pretemateral brilliancy, his eyes
sparklin with a lite thai cood only rome
from a sole surcharged with joy and a
skin to'ably full ur whiky, walked up
and down the room, rubbin hi i hands
with glee that cood not be repressed.
Ii all prepared?' a.-ked Randall, uv
a hutnbl' Iookin cuss that duz a share
ur his manngiu, (he wuz originally
pn id by Mrs. Cobb, but sence her en-
timely failyoor in bizni, he is allowed
the earnins ur one day in each month
uv a wisky inspector in Noo York,) i
everething arranged?"
'Itis yoor Eggslr-ncy." (To these
fellers all high officers are Eggslen
cie )
Is the powder procoored for one
hundrfd gunr-?'
"It is yoor Eggslency."
"Is th rockets drawn from the Navy
Department to be fired from the diff
ereni parts uv the city, to hov sponta
neous eithooia-ni?''
"They is, yoor E-jglency."
"Ht; the Department clerks bin no
tified that ii wood be well for them to
irl-illv fall into nrce?siuu when Hi
Eurclency, he Pre.ident. is to be ser
enadrd, ef they desire to keep ther
place?"
They hev"
llev the tran-'parenries bin paintid
with the" prxper-fneci iphuns? JJitr'yoo'
see one inscribed: Sinclair's majority
3. 000! No i Hanii'-hire's protest agi.i
impeachment! ?'
They hev, and I did."
"Then," said Rat dall. "all is in
readiness The brass b&nd I know
are in waitin; Sianberry writ ihe Pn-s
ident speech this moroin, and he hz
it lolatly well by halt and the joilifica
sb.in muft go fT smooth atid pleasaat.'
At this moment ihe President ap
proachd.
Ha!" ed he "one more nhort hour
Washington will be alive with joy, and
the country will breatne free. Noo
Hampshire has spoken. In a hour we
Sel hev the glnd intelligent that he
hs bin troo to the constthun a I ex
pound it thai she hes rebooted Sum
ner, and Stevens, and Wade andsich,
and ed in thunder tones to the impious
wretches who wood, in me pull down
the pillars of the Government, "stay
yer franticidl hand.' The thot over-
powers me. Lets tawe tutnin.
A half hour wuz sp -nt in innocent
hilarity. The President showed his
thoroughness ur his reconversion to
Dimocrasy by tak n hisn s'rate with
nothin in it. while Seward betrayed
bis onjin and his consekent onreliabil
iiy, by (I rink in som kind uv a lite wine
with no more tody into it than wood be
in watered cider.
"Con'u.-hun to Wad-!" exclaimed
the President, holdin up his glas and
waichin the beads rise to the surface
with a pleaded eye.
"Noo Hamp-heer!" said Seward,
"may Cont-ecticut carry forward the
work she hes so gloriously begun "
"Our offises!" sed Randall, "long
may we h -Id em."
"Kentucky!" sed I, "alius troo; tho
all other States may desert Dimocrisy,
Kentucky will be faithful mong the
faithlis found. Her distilleries atteM
her steadfastness to her party obliga
shuns."
And in sich toasts the thirty minutes
wore away.
A private sekretary entered.
"A di-paich from Noo Hainpsheer!"
"Ha!" sed Randall seizin it "nw
tren ble, Ablibin; quake, Stevens, for
yoor time is come! Exalt your horn.
Democracy for the reachun is her!
The gentie and trutful sfkretary,
upened it, read a moment, and turned
pale and fell a faintis on the floor
Seward glanced at it, and cspi"g:
"Thi is end of life, (which he intend
ed for his las-t words.) fell likewise
rostrate.! The President snatched it
fri-m Smvard's hand, and faintid
acrost the rest of em; and Welles seein
the President faint, did it beroz the
President did, without readin it.
Welles takes physic every time the
President does
I anaiched the dispatch and read it
myself, ez toilers:
"To The Pkesidest AM Is up
I'm a dead duck. Harriuian is elected
by about 3,000. The reackshui, got
tuck in a notch uv the White Moun
tains. Pray for us."
Utter in a siingin cues at Dean and
JJurr, and them fellers who tied deceer
ed us into a beleef that Noo Hump-
eheer wus safe, I sot about a bringin
uv em to. ihe I reticent was the
longest a cumin out ur the faint. S:tdly
they ariz, one after another, ther de
jecshun comrafiin powerfully with the
hilarity uv a moment afore.
Ringin a bell, Randal sed to the
clerk who answered it ez fullers:
-You may inform the bunds that it
won't be necessary for em to longer
wait. The men atiendin the attilery
nviy retire to the buzzums of ther fain
i'ies, and those watin to be formed into
spontaneous pnceshuns may be dis
missed. The Pr.-S'dent hez decided
not to be serenaded to-nite."
Ji-t then a band wuz heard approach
in. "Thunder1" sed Randall, dare they
play wi hout orders?"
Uu. we discovered that it wuz not the
offiehel band. A perceshun wuz seen
pa ssi n afore the White House, headed
by a transparency, onto wich wuz a
d d duck, wiili a face wonderfully like
Hi- Eggslency's and the band behind
wuz a piaym dea marches sua sicn,
with muht-d drums. Foi r tirri-'s these
hanless curses passed up hod down
afore the White House. V
"Is it not hidyur?'-:-sed tfia Presi-
itunl . 'I
i -1.
"Served you rite." sed.
vood taVe i.hejiijattejr jo.yti''li'tjJa '
yuo wood attempt the work uv a states
man wuh the qualifica-'hens uv a I'o-
ice Court lawyer. Retched man,"
said I, trauffixiu bun with my piercen-
est gize.
"Why wood you attempt to eat fire,
whose mouih is only capable uv Li;n
burg cheese! Wr.h Grnt at ihe head
of the armies, why did roo attempt
revolo?hei? When you altetnp'ed to
drive Stanton out, hadn't yoo sense
enuff to know that it made a direct
shoo atween yoo and the Abiishimsls
from which they cood not escape, atid
that yoor deth or thern wuz inevitable?
Yoo made it neceary for em to lay
yoo. and, in trooth, they hev made a
irely corniueneinen I . Noo I lamp
heer is a fatal stab, impeachment will
.I i i . i . i
oner in sixty uays onu men a long
arewc-ll to all our glory. Good mte.
oor Egsjslency; pleasant dreenn. I'il
to my chamber."
And I left ihe p-or man weepin great
tears and bitter ont-s.
I sent the fullerin dispatch home to
the Cross Roads by telegraff. Twuz
rather expensive on the Government
but Seward told me that telegraffin
wuz a legitimate expenditoor, and to
yoose the wires much ez I rho-e:
To Pogram. Deekin; Bascam, JllcPcl-
tei and Gavitt. Jr., Trustees.
These Greetis: Deerly beloved, I
saloot yoo. Nt joyfully, and with
liteness ur hart, but on the contrary
quite the reverse We've bustid.
Veni. Vidi, Vict! wich, the way we
translate it, means. "We cum, we
saw, and go: aqueezed. "It is my painful
duty to inform yoo that Noo Hampsheer
uv wich we expectid belter things, hez
gone lunatic agin, anu hez electid a
hater ur us and ouru ez its Cheef Mag
ikirate. In this crisis I direct that
next Friday mrnin.,between the-hours
ur 9 and 11a m. be ob.erred as a day
ur fastin and hoomiliation. I wood
her yoo hold service at the church, but
I found that I had broi away in my v
lise the only Bible in the Corners, and
it is therefore impossible Ez no la
ber is ever done at the Corners, it aim
nessary to direct yoo toab-tain there
from, but will give over yoor yojsual
occupashun ezjjfollers:
1. No seven up ur poker play in door
in that period
2. Nohoss racin. copper pitchin. fijjht
in, or other amusements will be admis
sable.. ,
3. And that the fiVsh maybe mort fi
ed to a extent commensurate wi'h the
calamity that bez befallen us, oo likker
will bj allowed between those hours
cepu'o to invalids i nd persons ur ex
treme age.
Ther will-be weepin and wailin
the Corners wen this is receeved.
Petroleum V. Nasbt, P M.
(Wich is Postmaster.)
Adrertisinc Adrentures.-How
They l'lucb. their Prey.-Ex
perience of a Victim.
From the 4dver tier's Gaietta
mat the tools are not all dad or
even suffering any viaibli dimtiuition
in number, may be safely inferred by
the success thut so unfailingly attend
unblushing scoundrelisrn and thamelesn
rascality. The sharp practice-), wiley
schemes and villainous impositions prac
ticedby adventurous tharpera of this
city upon a too credulous rural popula
tion, have, one would think, been suf
ficienily shown up to put all on ibeir
guard. The retired physician, whose
sands of life have nearly run out, the
married couple about retiring to the
country, who wish o dispose of their
furnished brown stone mansion in the
Fifth Avenue, the owner of a si cret
that will enrich every possessrr, and
hundred other pretentious swindles that
have been before the nub'ic. have been
srnil limn nil nrrain hm ihora i
till no lack of gudgeon ready to snap
-r -d 1 "
at the most transparent bai:; and, to
show the bold effrontery of the tricks
and traps by which the weak-minded
are taken in, we append the statement
of one who has dev-jted himself to
ANSWTBINC advertisements
He says: "Feeling th.t a lack of
profitable employment kept many of
mv v,iunr fn-nd in ih wv .f that
celebrated Satanic personage who al
ways finds something for idle band to
do.' I sent five dollars lo some philoso-'
pher in Maine who was willing io com
wo.- ,ii -,f .b;-i
..-n .e;rf
n;....rt'r.r . V 1,rl
came a book by return of ' post. " The
volume wis labelled -Tvpo-raDhia.'
On ,m,.incr it a lin of naner was
- t o -- r r i
found between the title page and the
blank leaves, and on the slip was writ
ten :
"You may be either a type-setter, a
proof reader, or a foreman, by reading
this book. It contains all the necessary
information. You only reqrire a little
practice, which you can gain bv hiring
yourself out fur a year or two to any
respectable printer. E. E."
This was nearly as good as the ad
vice to a seekei after a fortune, who
sent money to an advertiser in Hart,
ford. Connecticut, and received the ad
vice "to peddle cigars, half Havana
and half home-made, as I d.d, and al-
ways b ready to pick up a stray chick-
en. '
My curiosity was next exercised by
an advertisement setting forth thai for
one dollar the likeness of my luture
"wife or husband" would be senl. 1
consulted with half -a dozen of my
bachelor friends on the subject, and we
unanimously resolved to invest one dol
lar each for the immense privilege of
seeinsr the individuals who were to be
our partners in this "vale of tears," and
who were to double our blessedness by
sharing our singularities Ii was un
derstood that each was to exhibit the
likeness ot his predicted bride for the
inpsection of the company, be she fair
or unfair. In due time I received ft
carle de visite through the post office.
It bore on its face the representation
of a female form, got up m the htgbt of
the latest fashion, regardless of ex
pense. A splendid o.-trich feather
crowned what, from its magnificence
and my ignorance, I will venture lo
designate an "empire" hat. A velvet
cloak trimmed with lace, was surmount
ed wuh a superb fur cape. A robe of
black silk was ornamented with nu
nitrous devices thai might have found
their origin in the brains of a kaleid
oscope A foot, or scarce half a foot,
peejied out from under a white s-kirt,
revealed by the dress being shghtly
raised. One tiny, tightly gloved haud
was just ri-ible. The face but ther
was the trouble, i was a back view
and might s well have been ts ken
from a dry goodsman's "djmmy" as
from the bumm form divine, so far as
the "likeness" conveyed any idea to
my imud. This was keeping the word
of promise to the ear and breaking it
to the hope wuh a vengeance 1 felt
inclined to tear the thing up, but, re-
j membenug my promise to my friend,
- 1 1 forebore. I found afterward that
I were all served alike. We have this
at consolation, however, that our wivts
lare to te fashionably dressed; that
if the present fashion miraculously
centinues until we are marred.
I
I saw lately a paragraph intimating
mat to an anxious inquirer ine aaver
t . . .t - J
user of a receipt for the prevention of ceisor 0f ,he sprightly and and regrei
the freezing of sjeterns or wells had tefj Thaddy Morris., loni. th. nmmr.fr
answered with this twenty-hve cents
a
worm 01 aufice:
. I 11 . t .1
lake your tiaicm ur wen into tue
house on cold nights and keep up
good fire.
Cheeky enough, but no worse than
the advice I paid a dollar for to an ad-
ruser who offered a remedy for fro.t
Dlt,en reel nd chapped nands, and
which was embraced in three words,
almost snauespenrian, "uo to uoa.
It .at ..n .af-vi.eil.
uut ootn were exceuea oy tne in
dividual who in late war times offered
:or hve dollars to show any one -a cer-
tain and infallible method of escaping
ihe draft, and
" ,r.A.A MAenakMAM wM a
wUuau F.u..
Commit suicide.
I need not say that for the outlay of
untold postage currency and postage
stamps, I tnive received no advice
whatever the ad rertisers of im porta nt
information having wis. ly considered
that it was a needless expense trying
lo enlighten me and that often I have
been invitee to invest l.i lotteries and
petroleum companies, and in the man
ufacture of articles militating against
health and morals. Some of my house
hunting friends inform me thai they
1. a ...a 11 a
nave oeeP victimized in small sums oy
advertisers who have ctlered intorma
Uon ol 'eases for sale, and oy pretem
d real estate agents who demanded a
i .
b0IiUS ,n advance.
' The following curious adventure
will serve as a caution ond will also
oo.tO'WTna up wun
v . .
A friend of mine, in some freak of
Mlenws, answered an advertisement,
whilk required the small sum of three
dollars for information by winch any
one could easily acquire a fortune.
My friend is a simple looking you'b,
and a very good illustration of the de-
ceptiveness of appearances. Shortly
after he had written the letter to the
bes'ower of fortunes, he was waited on
at his lodgings by a neatly dressed
young man, who produced my friend's
note, aud asktd if he had written it.
Affirmatively answered, the stranger
t egan to look cautiously around the
room, and going to the door opened it
suddenly, looked out into the hall,
closed the door and then with a know
ing smile came up to my friend and
"Q ne w" a Ku Juo8e ol ",ou
ey- -Tolerable, was the reply.
nThon linlr nt these." said the stran-
. ' "
g. producing a lot of htty-cent cur
rency stamps. My mend examined
"Dd sw D0WS WT0DS- The
stranger then began bis tale to unfold,
He would furnish any amount of fifty-
nt stamps at twenty-five cents.
Wnew! The murder was oui. My
friend was startled. What should be
dol Uall the police or kick me leuow
out.
To gain time for reflec'ion some
questions were asked. Suddenly there
were footsteps in the ball, and a alor-
ei-ly dressed man i ushed into the room.
cl' 6ed the door, and. with a sardonic
smile, seized the trembling vendor of
counterfeit currency by the coat collar.
and in a tragical whisper hissed:
Caught at l ist you're wan'.ed!" and
then lo my friend, "I arrest you as an
accomplice! I would give a hundred
dollars, if I were in your place to get
out of this affair!" My friend was as
tonished. In a moment, however, be
regained his self possession. Making
a bound for the window, he opened it
aud shouted "police!" The strangers,
on hearing the talismanic word, made
a rush fur the door and the street. The
rascals went but no police came. The
queer" was left behind and proved to
be mighty "queer." It was so like the
genuine that a broker declared itto be.
aud look it for good money, nnd my
friend made some fifty dollar by the
operation. Still, that kind of an acci
dent due not happen often enough to
make ihe answering of ewiudliug ad
vertisements profitable business. A.
Y. Dispatch-
Africa has a King with three hun
dred wires and seven hundred children,
and both still increasing.
j 'The Speaker's Page.
we j Gearge Alfred Townseod writes to
I ihe Cleveland Leader.
When you come to the House cf
is, Representatives, observe hesiJu'aneaka
er Colfax a young mad of clear com.
-
plexion and chesnut brown hair, about
twenty-five years old, perhspa That
I. ... . "
is jily Todd, the speaker' Pare, uc-
I ' o sr -
of tfie cht;r Perh u hare WCQ.
I AroA r,-, IVF- rlf.
i - - uv-.. in. vuuai, vvuiier aiuppiDIe
I
to talk w.ih people, wriring letters,
answering questione at the bar, can
yet keep so well in mind the intricat
business of the floor. It is Billy Todi
who is really watching all ibis. ' llm
knows the manual and the reason for
every ruling, and quietly rrompta
the speaker so ingeniously that tau
do not see It. He looks at every
bill before it is presented, trets the
tj,e cf it. iubmit9 jt in synopsis to Col-
fax anfj his mind is always going a
l;,,! nh,A .u..
la ...
I ff v uug)tivU lUill
ne never fails to hare the Speaker
fresh on his feef. In a house so large
the Han of Repr(enlltj-e. -h
slstaDt like this is essential
A Fooihahdt Expiditios. It ia
nnouncea mat capt. ihomas Garrett,
I . .
of this city, proposes to cross the At
lantic in a small boat twenty - feet in
length, five ftet and a baif breadth in
beam, two feet six inches keel to gun
wale, and constructed on the life-boat
principle. He intends to rail from
Chicago, via Detroit, to Quebec, thenct
o St Jonn's, New Foundland, whenc -he
will take his departure for the BrliJ
ish Channel. His onlv fellow Da;ien.
ger will be a New Foundland dog. H
hopes to be ready to sail by the 15ih of
June. -'
We had hoped thai the sad fate and '
sufferings of many who have tempted
rioitWeirtnTnriB inarrrer' proposed by
Oapt: Garrett, would deter others front
risking their lives in such foolhardy at- -tempts
to earn notoriety. Chicago
Republican.
Strcck a Rich Lead. They har
an emigration committee up at Nelras
ka City, who are making special ef
forts to secure emigration from the
South. They strive hard lo soothe tbt
feelings of the vanquished Chivalry;
invite thin to quit the scenes where,
they are constantly reminded of their
sorrows, and come to Nebraska, where
the people have a tender regard for
the feelings of patriots like them; and
refer to the hundreds of men of the
same stripe who went to Nebraska
from Missouri during the war, and
were never molested oo account of be
ing rebels The truth of the matter i, .
since the Missouri rebels have mostly
sneaked back home, the Nebraska De
mocracy are left in the short rows, and
are seeking for such emigrants as they
can always depend upon to vote the
Democratic ticket. The South is their
best bolt." A class of men who
were reduced to rags and starvation
when they could no longer compel the
negroes to work for tbem far nothing,
will make valuable settlers in a new
country.
is 1
l5SF"The point raised by Senator
Drake as to whether the Chief Justice,
while bitting as President of the Sen
ate during its sessions as a Court of
Impeachment, shall be addressed aa
"Mr. Chief-Justice," or as "Mr. Pres
ident. not very important either tothe
Senate or the Chief Justice. We con
fers our inability to see which title may
be deemed more courteous, or to ex
press the greater degree of defference
for the presiding officer, but whichever
it be should be adopted. All the titles ,
thr Chief Justice can wear are feeble
compared with the plain "Mr. Chase.'
by which he will be sufficiently k.iown
in history, for this was never worn by
a Taney or an Andrew Johnson. The
others were Ttilune.
82rAfier reaching eighteen, Span- '
ish vagabonds are to be at ihe mercy
of the Police. What becomes of ihe
Queen?
ge3A letter sent to ihe London
Post office, directed to "Mr. Owl
O'Neil." frund its owner in Sir Row
land Hill. ...
C2Tlt ha- been decided in England
that a stamped fac simile of a siguature
is as. valid as a written one.
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