Nebraska herald. (Plattsmouth, N.T. [Neb.]) 1865-1882, October 24, 1867, Image 1
WfflkritAst Bill" ""Wwi mtmrrmm i ufj mm -Wrya rraM j 7 rm ?um attempts to haul down the jlmarican Plug, shoot him on the spo't." VOL. 3. PL.VTlIOUTII, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, OCTOBER 21, 18G7. AO. 29,. THE HERALD IS PUBLISHED w kly, By II. D- HATHAWAY, EDITOR AND PFIOFR.IETOFI. T"0Ece corner Maia street and Lcv.-c, second ttoi V. Terms: .$2.50 per annum. Hates of Advertising Cj square (space of ten line) oue insertion, tl .50 Ec.i snbse juer.t insertion - - l.'O Prefer imal cards not exceeding six lines 10 00 Oir quartercijlamn oriels, per annum US 0 " six mouths 20 ( 0 ' " three months J5 ahalf column twelve month Co.O') " six months 83.00 three months 2i.oo Ojeooluran twelve months - loo 00 six months 60.00 three months . - 35.00 all tranr-ient adverti-ements mast he paid for in advan.-e. ti We are pnpared to do all kinds of Job Work a short notice, and in a style that will give satis faction. WILLITT POTTENGER ATTO RNEY AT L A W, rLATTSMODTII - - NEBRASKA. T. JIJIARQIETT, ATTORNEY AT LAW -AND- Solioitor in Chancery. PLATTSMOUTH, - - NEBRASKA Carpenter ad Joiner CONTRACTOR and BuTDER, Will do work in lifs line with n eatnest. an dUpatc, apon short notice. Dr. J. S. McADOW, HAVING RFTIKXFT? TO ROCK BI.CFFS TO practice Physic, otteis his profe.-Monnl (.ervires to hi oi patrons and public generally. Particular attention paid to iliwas-s of th LYK. A cure miar antt-ed in all curable cases. Charges moderate oauie as one year apo. jti mC II. H LTVINGSTOIT, M. D. Physician and TCC, Tei'der his professional services to the citizens of Cafls i-mpiy. r Krsiilence in Frank Wliit's h n-e, corner nf Oa'c .Sixth streets; Otlice on Main street, ppu it Court House, Plattsmouth, Xel raska. Platte VaSiey Mouse Ed. B. MunriiY, Proprietor. Corner of Jliiii and Fourth Streets, K'lallsmocjtli, Ttvli. TMj llci'j bavin b. en fitr -l . .i--l.. rt rili d i'l.-r fimt tla Si acj. i:ii:itd jtioiif. lfca..l ' tlie d.iy or wecic. r. uj-"JS BUEKS & CO. Pe I rs in BUY GOODS, ROrKIl2E A 'IRICUL TCHA L IMI'LEMES TS, And a general asortsaent of s- 13 ns'ial y kept in a i;iKt-c!as country store. Avoca, Cass Co., Nek. auel ft. MAXWELL, SAM. M. C II A I'M V N .llaxivcll & Cliuimiasi, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, AND Solicitors in Chancery. PLATTSMOUTII, - XEMIASA'A. Pile over Llack, Eutf ry i Cu's Crug Store. prt CLARKE, PORTER & ERWIII, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, And Solicitors in Chancery, ma ix ST.,orrosiTE Tin: cockt-iiuch: PLATTSMOUTII, NEB. 41TL0KD 3. CLAKKK, lL FOKE-1 rCUTfclt, W. W. LRU IN. REAL ESTATE A'iESCY. C JaaJl wtf JOSEPH (K SOLATER, WATCYMAKER and JEWELER, MAIS Stbekt, PLATTSMOUTII, - - NEBRASKA A prood assortment of Watches OI old Pens Jewelry, Silver Ware, Fane; ioo 's Violins and Vi olin Trimmings always on hand. All work com Kitted to his care will be warranted. April 10, let,5. O. H. IRISH, CALHOVS & CROXTOS, tate uj't Indian Affairs. Attornt-y tit Law IRISH, CALHOUN & CR0XT0N. The above named (tentlemen have associated themselves in business for the purpose of prosecnt in and colleciics all claims apainst the General Oovernment, or against any tribe of Indians, and re prepared to (roecutP auch claims, either before Congress, or anr of t he Departmei;t of Oovernment or before the Court of Claims, Ma. Irish will devote bis personal attention to ti! business at Washington. S3" Otlice at Nebraska Cfty, corner of Main and Tift a streets. .. ADLEB, B A. rBISKMAK. S. ADLER & CO., BECTIFIEES .VD DISTILLERS, Dealers in all kinds of Foreign and Domestic -WINES, LIQUORS AND CIGARS. JVC. 14, EAST SIDE MARKET SQUAUE, St. Josepli, yiu. oc25 ly National Claim Agency. WASHINGTON, D- C- F. M. DORRINGTON, SCB AGENT:j PLATTSMOUTII, - - NEBRASKA, Is prepared to present and prosecute claims before Conres, Court of Claims and the Dept. Jmetits. Pa tents, Pensionp, Bount e, and Bounty Lam! se cured. fSCharjes moderate, and in proportion to the aimutit of the claim. V. M. DORKINGTOX. April 10, '65 G It. McCALIiUM, Manufacturer of and dealer in -Saddles and Harness, Of every description, wholesale and retail, Vo. 130; Main street, between Slh and 6:h streets. X-braska- City. je!3 ace to eet chesp Lamps and I nrnr Chimne ! is at d vBLACK BUTTERY V0. From Th- Sevr To'k Tritttne. If a President bad been chosen in the Autumn of 1SG2. he would have been a champion of National restora tion by means of giving the whole country up to the revolted Slaveholders and bidding ihem work their will wiih it; if one had been chosen in the Au gust of 1S61, he would have been pledged to peace on any terms with the Confederate rebels. Had the builders of the Chicago P'atform of that year evinced the simplest common sense had they briefly resolved that they wanted Union and Peace, and didn't care what became of the Nigger nay, had they known enough to say nothing at all Gen. McCIellan could have barely been beaten, even with the dead weight of Pendleton bung to his skirts. Tt . Til . . iaai 1'iauorm cost mm more votes m this State than composed Lincoln's majority; we presume it was the same in Connecticut, and elsewhere. We consider that Lincoln's election was se cured by Sherman's capture of Atlanta and Sheridan's victories in the Valley of Virginia ; but McClellan's over whelminrr discomfiture was engineered ty Vallandigham & Co. at Chicago. The Republicans owe their victories of 1866 primarily to Mayor Munroe and his subordinate Thugs in New Orleans; but Andrew Johnson k Co, greatly intensified them by their ha rangues while "swihging 'round the circle" semewhat later. Eliminate those two elements from tti6 CHDY3S3, and we could not have called out the full vote that gave us Pennsylvania, New Jersey and New York. There may have been no more Republicans in tuber State after than before those performances; but a good many more of thtin found their way to the polls than would have done but for Messrs. Monroe and Johnson. Tiie II -publican party need net de pend fur its victories on the persistem misbehavior of its tnrmies. li is strong enough to rule l y its own merits, inde p?ndti.t!y of their follies and crimes. Iiut to thia er.d, it must 1. Complete prcmpily tha Reconstruction f the Southern States on a ba?is of blended ju.-tice ar.d magnanimity. 2. Systemat ically educate and enlighten the Peo pie. The necessity and urgency of closing up the work of Reconstruction on the broad at:d safe basio of Univer sal Amnesty with Impartial Suffrage is now so clar that we will not dwell upon it. Events are more cogent thnn arguments. We will speak to day only to the second point. If there were neither a newspaper nor a common schcol in the country, the Democratic party would be far stronger than it is. Neither elemen tary instruction nor knowledge of trans piring events is needed to teach the es sential articles of the Democratic creed: ' 'Lcre rum and hate niggers." The less one learns and knows, the more certain he is to vote the "reg'lar ticket from A to Izzard." But Republicanism rests on a radi cally different tasis, and is sustained by wholly diverse considerations. It lives by Intelligence ; it dies in the murky, stifling atmosphere of Igno rance. Canvass almost nny township in the land, and distinguish those who take from those who fail to take a newspaper, and you will find that two thirds of those who take vote Republi can, while three-fourths of those who read nothing but achaEcepaper picked up for a few moments in a bar-room vote the Democratic ticket, and will not be persuaded to touch any other. If every man in the country could read, and did habitually read two good journals, one of each party, we should have no more doubt of electing a Re publican President next year than of the rising of the sun. Bui every voter who does not read is a peril; and the multiplicity of such voters subjects the results of our elections too much to the control of accident. Fortune will not always fivor us as she did in 1S64 and 1S6G. We can be sure of victories only by deserving them. And the duty now imperatively pressing upon us is to take care that every vot?r who can read, and will read it, or who has some one in his family who can and will read it to him, is seasonably supplied with a good Republican journal for the whole year 1SG3. We are not going to succeed so easi ly as many have fondly calculated, and we rejoice that we are not. If we let the contest go at hap hazard, and do not seasonably provide for and deserve success, we may be beaten. But if we Begin now, and, by concerted, system atic effort, put a good Republican news paper into the hands of every voter who will read it, we cannot be beaten Flooding the country with printed matter on the eve of an Election is desperate resort better than nothing, and that is all. No reliance can be placed on it; lit.Ie good ordinarily comes of it. But begin now, and systemati caliy insure that every man that has a vote shall have a newspaper if he will take it, and all is scfe. Republicans resolve to see to it at once! A Brief Love-Story. John Paul, the brilliant and versatile correspon dent of the Springfield Republican, ob jects to the introduction of the numen clatore of the prize ring into jourualism ancv. he says, a "love scene written up as follows :" 'Twas night, and the aromatic Ara bella and the fiiiginous Fitzfocdle, in accordance with a previous arrange ment play or pay being the word were seated in the garden. Both were in excellent condition and showed the benefit of good training. Arabella was a little too much in the flesh, perhaps, but Fitzfoodle didn't carry an ounce of spare weight, and stepped smilingly into tne ring, look ing confident of winning. The moon in the far heavens lay smiling and serene like a bottle holder, while the stars looked down with their ni spectacular organ, seemingly ready to act as referees. A clock in the neiehbouing kitchen Crtllid lime. Little was lost in preliminary spar ring; side by side sa: the amative am etuers. grasping each oiherx' mawlt-ys. In.loeJ iv . u.. - i.v.:f-i . calling back memories cf tha halcyon day when the Cahoss Chicken had a mill with tlie Skantatelod Sockdellager. A counter or two, and Fiufocd'a neailv r t his fin around Arabella's ribs, h'3 riht still grasping her smali and delicate bunch of fives. "Is your money mine ?'' aiked Fitz toodla in tender accents. No reply was heard ; it was evident that the side-winder had knocked the breath out of Arabella. But the demoralization was but mo mentary '-I don't see it," she said, getting her left fin out of chancery. This was one cn Fitzfcodle's nob. Ha went down on his knees lo avoid further punishment. At this there were cries of '-fowl,'' "fowl," in a res taurant near by, and the victory was claimed for Arabella. But Fitzfoodle refused to give it up, and both retired to their corners. Arabella came up, looking game to the backbone ; Fitzfoodle notwith standing his late punishment, still smil ing and confident. "My parents are wealthy," he mur mured, and again got his left duke in on Arabella's ribs, and fibbing away until there was danger of a row out sids the ropes. "The figures ?" she gasped. "A peach orchard in New Jersey." he returned, and with that put one in on her potato trap, which she returned with interest on his kisser. There was a lively round of sounding exchanges, and it was plain that from that forth Fitzfoodle had the fight bis own way. Finding it useless to hold out any longer, Arabella threw up the sponge. closed her lovely peepers, and reposed her lovely knowledge box peacefully uprn Fitlfoodle's manly breadbasket, utterly regardless of the fact that a huge musquito had tapped her bugle, and was drawing the claret at a fearful rate. TThe London corresponder.:" a New York paper says of Maw.une Jenny Lind Goldschmidt: Jenny Lind left many friends and admirers in America, who will be sorry to hear that her latest appearance in public hat been a failure. That the freshness of her voice should be gone was inevitable, but it seems to be agreed that ita splendor and strength are also gore. In plain' truth, it is now little better than a beautiful wreck, which the frequent ardor of the still aspiring artist only makes the more apparent." The Xext alioual ISepublican Convention. It is announced from Washington that the National Executive Commit tee of the Repullican party have defin- ately decided in favor of holding the next National Republican Convention in the city of Chicago. No decision has been reached in regard to the time of holding the Convention, amd the settlement of this question will proba bly be postponed for some months. In selecting as the place of holding the National Convent?) of 1S6S the city where the first Republican President was nominated as well as the last un successful Democratic candidate, the Committee have paid a just compliment to the State which gave Abraham Lin coln to the nation, and to the North west which rallied with such enthusi asm to the defense of the Government when it was assailed by traitors. The selection is at once a recognition of the hospiale spirit which has ever char acterized the citizens of Chicago in their reception of immense masses of people gathered together in their mid;.t, and of the power of the Northwest in the Union, and an omen of future victory. The last two National Republican Conventions those of 1S60 and 1864 consisted of delegates from the States represented in the proportion of two to each Representativos and Senators in Congress. If the same apportionment should be adopted in calling the Con vention of 1S6S as will undoubtedly be the case its composition as to mem bers from the different States will be as follews : ORGANIZED STATES! Mail Sc Hampshire Vermont Masachu-otts Rhode lsi.md li I Indiana 10 ll'in.is 10 I Wisconsin 24 j M innesola S I Iowa 1-i J Missouri 2C 32 10 s to DO 2- 2'J b G 6 10 6 4H4 Connecticut New Yori 60 Xc Je-sey 14 Per n.-ylvauii 5- Di lawai-e 6 May. and 14 U'e-t Viririuia 10 Kentucky Tennessee Ivanita... Nebraska Nevada '"a.ifornia OrtSoa Ohio 42 Jl.cliian 14 1 Ol.il, ;L a. UNRECONSTRUCTED STATES: Ylrjrin'a to I Alal ania 10 14 1 1 12 10 11 I 6 N .nil Carolina IS I V.ssiss ppi bi.uili Carolina V2 I Louisiana e I'eia IS I Texas Florida a I Arkansas Total, 10 f'atts. Add Colorado (probably) (i rand Total C4ij This is upon the assumption that the work cf reconstruction in the States rectn'.ly in rebellion w;ll be completed by the time the Convention is called, and that they will participate in the proceedings which will doubtless be the case. The coming Convention will have additional interest from the fact that it will be the first National Repub lican Convention attended by delegates from all the States m the Ui.ion. c utiful Alscgorj-. The following beautiful allegory is translated from in; German: Tophrcnius, a wise teacher, would not suffer even his grown up sons and daughters to associate with those whose conduct was not pure and upright "Dear f ather," said the gentle Eula- lia to hira one day, when he forbade ter in company with her brother to vi.-it the volatile Lucinda, "you must think us very childish if vou imagine we could be exposed to danger by it " The father took in silence a dead coal from the hearth, and reached it to his daughter, "It will not burn you, my child, take it." Eulalia did so, and behold! her deli cate white hand was soiled and black ened, and, as it chanced, her white dress also. "We cannot be too careful in hand ing coals," said Eulalia, in vexation. "Yes, truly,'' said her father, "you see, my child, that coals, even if they don't burn, blacken. So it is with the company of the vicious." 5FHenry Ward Beecher, in his discourse on Sunday, said that "soma men will not shave on Sunday, and yet they spend all the week in shaving their fellow men; and many folks think it very wicked to b'ack their boots on Sunday morning, yet they do not hesi tate to black their neighbor'? reputation on week days." What is Democracy? The Irish JVeirssays: "We ask again the plain question, what is the Democratic party, that the Irish people seem to cling to it as their only salvation here and here after ?' In c ur bumble judgement, the main object of that party is to make po litical tools of the Iriih people." Fnm TJn Xeio York Tribune. ECTIOXS A LESOTi, Late in the Summer of 1S62, Mr Lincoln was persuaded, after long urg ing and hesitation, to isue his edict of Emancipation. Tho country, it was said, was not prepared for it that is, the slow coaches we; e not. And, when the elections that soon followed showed Democratic gains almost everywhere from East to West the "Conserva tives" shouted that Abolition and Rad icalism had received their death blow. "Look at Maine, Massachusetts, Mich igan, Wisconsin!" they exclaimed "iheir Republican majorities reduced more than half; see Pennsylvania car ried by the Democrats, und a U. S. Senator gained, in spite of Lincoln's large majority; see Ohio, swept clean by 5,000 majority for the Democrats, who carry fourteen Representatives in Congress a clear gain of seven; see Indiana, Illinois likewise carried both branches of the Legislature, two-thirds of the Representatives in Congress, and a Democratic U. S. Senator gained in each; see New Jersey, which gave Lincoln four of her seven electors, now swept by the Democrats by over four teen thousand majority, giving another Senator, with four of the five Repre sentatives in Congress; look at New York, where Lincoln had fifty thous and majority, and the Union ticket last year a hundred thousand, now electing Seymour Governor by ten thousand, and seventeen to fourteen Representa tives in Congress do you not see the handwriting on the wall ? Isn't it high time to give up nigger worship, and attend to saving the Union?" These taunts were bitter, but the exultation that impelled them was tran sient. Though Fredericksburg, and Galveston, and the first repulse at Chancellorsville. were still before us, the National cause was not lost, for it was the cruise of Freedom and Humaii- y. Much less is it lot now, though the Talse hearts which thiught the de feat of Wadsworih, and tha loss of Ohio, Pennsylvania, Indiana, and Illi nois, lessons that only the blind could fail to read and heed, till remain to renew thair croaking?, and have anoth er, though lesser, opportunity. JuJje Sharsvvood is elected to the Suproma Court of Pennsylvania, as we feared he would be; and we believe this the extent of the Democratic tri umph in that State. Many Republicans would vote for him on personal grounds; yet a good County ticket in Philadelphia would have defeated his election. But it w.-s supposed that any thing would be elected that could get cn the Repub lican ticket; so nominations were made that the people would not support; while the Democrats, having littls hope of success, nominated three soldiers who had a good War record, for the best offices, and so gained thousands of votes. We trust the lesson will not be lost on those who control nominations in our State. We can tell them that the Legislative jobbers and Railroad robbers who ar3 "fixing things" in sev eral districts to nominate themselves to our next Legislature may buy ever so many delegates, but cannot buy the people, iur. jacoo faharp, tor exam ple, will waste his racney if he uses it lo achieve a Republican nomination, We shall of course have the old cry renewed "See how Ohio has voted down Equal Manhood Suffrage had not we better drop the Nigger, and take care of ourselves?" The answer is ready: Ohio oq Tuesday gave more votes, and a larger proportion of her Republican strength, for Manhood Suf irajre, than any otner state has ever given more by many thousands than she would ever have given till now. Say that one Republican in every twen ty went straight over to the enemy on this question, and one weak brother voted the Republican ticket but failed to vote for Manhood Suffrage, what of it? New York, twenty-one years ago, gave but 55,406 votes for Equal Rights; in i860 she more than doubled this, giving it 197,503; and still it was heav ily beaten, though Lincoln carried the State at that election by 50,000 major ity. The next time it will have at least 300,000; and, if beaten by a handful, its enemies will scream and fire guns for their glorious victory. So it will be in other State?; while the vital prin ciple cf genuine Democracy marches on through seeming defeats to its inev itable and conclusive triumph. I There are still some persons iu the Republican caiiip whose hearts are with the adverse host, and who, we trst, will n w be tempted t3 let their tod ies follow. At all events, through wxiatever trials or us constancy, it consistency, the great party of which they would fain Lear the bag so long as there may be anything likely to go into it, will move right on to the ardu ous but inevitable achievement of Equal Rights for all citizens; and those who are not ready to suffer in that cause cannot leave its ranks too soon. "Sol diers!" said Garibaldi to the forlorn hope of Italian liberty in 1S39, "I offer you privation, hardship.hunger.wounds, death will you follow me?" Such is the spirit in which Humanity and Jus tice claim their votaries; such are the appeals, such the crises, which separate the gold from the dross. When the Republican party has no further preju dices to vanquish, no further wrongs to redress, we hope it may die and be buried; not linger on, maintaining a mockery of existence on the good ideas of the past, the bad whisky of the present, like the Sham Democracy Whenever all -its better aspirations shall have been actualized, its dissolu tion cannot and should not be postponed. long THE J03II RIIXS PAPERS. Josh Cleans out his Pigeonhole of Cor- pondents. Iowa Don't press the matter tew much. The only way to heal a gal ov the 'wonts' iz to get her wonted, and then stampede things briskly- Eharpley The best thing I know ov for tight boots iz small feet. Albany I kant tell you what the usual life insurance rate iz. Perhaps Andy Johnson kaii tell you; he has lately bin reinsured, his pulicy having about rcn out. JIikc It ain't necessary that c, pray er tew be good should be very long or very loud. I have used one like this fur the last 4 years and it suits rac: 'O, Lord ! visit mi heart fust, mi head next and rni pecketbeok last. JIason 'Man wants but littla here below,' may have been true when first written but ever sense the war he wants awl he can lay hi3 claws on Byron i read yure pome carefully ; it wont anser. It iz tew much longer than it iz wid?. poetry iz a good deal like a clothes line, apt to spread length ways if at r.11. Most every body sum tiro o during their lives haz the poetry ailment, jisl az they hev the teeth cut, but one teeth cutting satisfies every body but the phools. Abigail Bonnets continue to be worn yet; the present etila iz about the size ov a ko!d buckwheat kake : feathers are not so mutrrh worn this spring, on akkour.t ov the grate supple ov bob-taled rtaeters in the kuntry. w t Liizzy ice gentleman yu inquire iz a bachelor in full communion by pre fession; hiz habits for honesta iz good; he pays cash for hiz whiskey and bill yards. Farmer I kant tell ya how mutch oats it iz best to put on an aker, but thin!: at a ruff guess, 15 or 20 bushels would be a grate plenty. I never had but 7 years chance at farming, but if mi memory served me right (and I never caught her in a lie) rye must be a good crop to raise, for old rye sells now quick for 6 or 7 dollars a gallon. J5fA Paris correspondent writes of the approaching fashions in hair " I have endeavored to find out what colored hair and eyebrows will be worn this year. The artists in hair have met and agreed that dark brown eye brows are to accompany golden tresses, and golden eyebrows black hair. Brown or chestnut locks and curls are not to be tolerated. It is not quite set tied if the chignon is to be maintained; it is believed not, if a more expensive and complicated decoration can be in vented. The complexion is to be dead pearl pale, the lips very light pink, and the mouth to be worn slightly open." fA Pittsburgh paper tells how thieves met a gentleman walking ths streets late at night with a box under his arm and undertook to show him the hotel. They relieved him of the box and ran off with it. The gentleman was a naturalist, and his box contained four rattlesnakes. Fancy the thieves' emotion when investigating their prise! fulfil takes three editors to run a Nt-w Orleans paper cne to get ki'led in the duels, one tod'e of yellow fever, and one to write obituaries. QtPeaches aro so plenty in some parts cf Michigan that thousands of bushels will rot under the trees. They ar to be had in endless quantities at from 25 to 50 cents a bushel. JCSThe new opera house in Paris will contain twenty large statues, forty busts and four groups of statuary, and will be adorned with 500 marble mon olite columns. J&fTke fashion reports from Paris announce that large hoops aro again to be in vogue, and short dresses be again worn only by young girls. This is bad news especially the latter part of it. -o m r , JgfAn eld lady annouced in court at Atlanta ' that she "had no counsel, that "God was her lawyer." "My dear madam," ieplied the Judge, "he does not practice in this court." J&5FA country editor, describing the bonnets now in fashion says ; "They have a downward slant, that re minds one of a vicious cow with board across her eyes." '"'England has imported twice as much wheat this year as last, and three times as in 1SG5. But eight per cent, went from the United States, though the amount this year was nearly five times as much as in 1S66. JSSThe following, from a paper published near the settingJs, is very severe on the east. "Johnny," said a little thres year old sister to an elder brother of six, "Jihnny, why can't we see the 6un go back where it rises?" "Why, sis, you little goossy, because it would be ashamed to be seen going down east." ECAt a t-ial m a divorce case, a witness, receruly, ia England, made tae following lepiyr Mr. Sergeant Tindal "He lre?led her very knidly din he nots" Atkinson "Oil, ya, he kis-cd her several times!" Mr. Ser peuzil Tindal "And how did she treat him?" Atkinson "Weil, she retali ated." fTh? Chicago Times the recent election in the light of Cop perhead triumphs, exclaims: "It is 'he judgement cf the country upon negro supremacy at the South. Let ue thank God." This, is the sume bheet that clamored co lustily for hnpsrtial suf frage aud nesvo supremacy at the South a shcrt time ago ! .COGcr.era! Sheridan had an enthusinstic reception in Albany. In his speech he said : "To my old com rades I may say that fcr the last few years we have been making history, and I hope that history will ba good history, and that they will not have re corded in it that rebellion is honor able." went into the store cf a merchant, and asked if he wished to purchase a couple of chickens, at the came time throwing a couplo of live ones on the counter. "Why, yes," he replied ; "but will they lay there ?" meaning would they re main on the counter a few moments. "Lay there !" archly retorted the rus. tic beauty ; "No sir ! they wont lay nowhere. Them's roosters !" ESTThe PomeroyJ(Ohio) Telegraph . 1 1- I ' . 1 . L says: "loe lacu or euuoriai in wis weeks Telegraph can be accounted for by the fact that , we delayed writing until after the returns began lo come in, from the hope that we might gain inspiration therefrom ; but somehow they have most disgustingly failed to accomplish that object. The fact ia that we don't inspire worth a cent." A Mild Pcrgative. Recently we heard a good story of an occurrence which took place in Newburyport Mass. A servant girl in thai town went to Dr. Spofford for advice, declaring her ail ments to be pain in the bowels. The doctor gave her a cathartic, and request ed her t call again in a few days, which she did. He asked her if she had taken the medicine, to which she replied in the affirmative. He then asked: "Did anything pass you after taking it?" "Yes sir," the said "a horse and wagon and a drove of pigs " The doctor collapsed remarking: "I think you must be better." I r r 1 (! 1 ,1 , 1 ! ' i it i I!