From R 1,1;
THE ADVERTISER
c w. rjtxKOTJir&. y.&Kxcxxa.
FAIRBROTSER &. HACKER,
Publishers aai Preprltra.
?ubihbed ETsry Thursday Morning
AT 3&0WXV2LL. ITEBBiBrt.
TERMS, IW AirTANOE t
Os ecpy. ea yaar,.
Om copy, lx S103tlH
a copy, tares saaalas-
y Ho paper eeslfroisCn pac cntllpala luT,
READn?GXJLTTEE OKETERYPAGE
OmCIAL DIRECTOBT.
District Ofieers.
n "R.WJT
n?D.
Jndse.
.District Attorney
.District Clerk.
WlLLIX H. HOOVER-
Coantv Officer.
miPtB BTOXL CottntTJnd?e
aaiCt.CCI.BEKTSON
.Cleric and Recorder
A ii.nit.siuK.t-
.Treasurer
J. - KLECXXEE,
O B.PARKEH
J?n. Tl HHDOK
SherlC
fYimnpi
Rnrrgrnr
.Bsaool Superintendent
.Cosamlsaloners
PHtE.Tr CUOTTIEft
TfJW V IT. RTTOOTC.
tlOIW H. POUt-MaN
W
fRiSXREDFERS
J
City Ofieers.
J ll CARSON.
-Mayor
O A. CECIL.
-Police Jndse
3. BJKX3KEH
B. A.OSBORV
J. Or RCaaELI.
-Cierr
..Treasurer
Marshal
couNciLirEN.
W. HACKSEY.1
J03EPH RODY.J
A ItO BISON.
JL.lt aiLMOKLf-
e KBionAirri
E.KUDDART.
-lit Ward
ndWarf
Jrf-V7ard
BUSINESS GAUDS.
J-
H. BEOADT,
Attornev and Onnnielor at J-air.
OfleeorerStata Bank.BrownTilleJTeb.
SA. 0SS01X,
. ATTORSEY JlTLAW.
Oa. Ko 81 Main street. Brownrne. Neb
A.:
S. HOLLADA1.
Ph jrlelanT SBrgcsBi OtrstetrKslan.
Oradnatrd In 1S1. T.ocald In BrcvnTlHe IsSS.
CSce,t MAln street. BrownvlIle.Ueh.
T S. ST TILL,
V . ATTORITKirs AT a.A"W.
OSce cf Cocntr Jode. Brownvllle. Nebraska.
T L SCHICK,
! ATTOHSEl'ATl.AW.
OWcc overrsst OClcc.Bro-amvnie.tirwka
WT. ROGERS,
Attorney anA CoBnn)ortliw.
WllljlvedillseatawenUen to anylecalboslness
atrsstedtobts care. Ofilce opposite Post Ofice.
Srowtrrille. eb.
J LE0Y,
UNDERTAKER,
Oo&ie, zzzie on short notice. "Hue allra west of
ErownTlIlceb.
T TV. GIBSON,
BrJAcrcssirrn axd horse siioer
Warkdoae.to order nd malefaction guaranteed
Plrst streut. between Main and Atlantic. Brown
Tllle.Neb.
PJ
A-T CLIXE
FARRIONABI.R
BOOT AND SHOEMAKER
CUSTOM WORK raadeto order, and fits alway
cnoranteed, Kepsirlnj: neatly id promptly done
bop. So.S7Maln street. BrownTllIe.N'eb.
JACOB
MAROHS,
MERCHANT TAILOE,
and dealer In
Fle:ErH.rPieBcli. KcotcnewcnraaeT.ciflnitTlati.
Testlncs, Etc., Ktc.
Brownville. Kebraska.
B.
M. BA.ILEY,
auirrnn. akd dealer irs
LIVE STOCK.
XROWXVILLE, NEBRASKA.
rarmers, pleaae call and get prices; I want
to bundle yoar stock.
Ofilce Flint Manorial Bank.
IHARLES HELMER,
TA8HI0XABEB
Boot and Shoe
Having bought the cus
tom shop of A. Robison.
I am prepared to do wort
of all kinds at
Reasonable Rates.
JSRepalrlnj; neatly and
promptly done.
Shop No. C Main Street,
ItrowttriUe "ebraslca.
Asm ralner.
Sett. Joinsca
NEW RESTAURANT,
Palmer & Johnson.
First Beor West
of the Old
Bcildlng.
Satlgnal Back
atWrKfiSS81
warm meals can be hnd-at all hours, iney
rlv their customers the best viands m the
market. Including fresh
oyattss sered In
any manner called for.
Try the New Restaurant
All Order for an Express Left with
Them Trill be Promptly Attended to
We Mean Cured, Hot Merely Relieved
JLni. Can JVorc WIU tee Claim.
SfThtiToreBo fallnrrnml imdiiap.
tntmatJk tt you are trouble! wtlU
Cl IIKAWACHK roil -anl?eU and
qotrkly T-uif"!. n hundred have bcn
nlrrrnix. TVcfcfaall be plcacd lo snail a
hTtof i-Liiinnlnl to nay Jatcrrntrtt.
CARTER'S LITTLE LIVER PILLS
Alw cure all ftrsrtof BKiocaes. prevent Oonstl
palxt. Tv--ria.. promote LMpest-on. relieve
J4sri Iroat itio ucarsy eating, correct Disorders
of tlir Suwn' J. Ntinrulatc tb- IJr, and Rero
t&trtli D-JVriR. TJiry tlnaXl this Vy taVinr Just
oo iitUc p I Ma firNT Tn-v are purtiy vegeta
ble. ta not srtpenr pnrc "tal are s sitarly pr-f-rti.U3sixjvUiiJrf.-rapI!lu)W.
Price Sceaaj
Sfir?t -' . 1 cr- --r--hTecireat byniiil.
CAiiTr.n TiEnirtNE con erie. i?a-
Blod by A.W. KlckelL
r7yl.
B. G. WHinEHORE,
DE.VLEK IN
GROC?ERIES,
PKOVISIOIfS,
SEWING MACHINES
ETWIKB SICKKfE EEPaTBS a SPECIALTY,
"stHlpay thaWsrheat market price for scrap
IfOz. an-i ra-a, slain at.,'W5t Bro'smrlUs.
n
MHMDACfri
!feik Ar m i -.
I Xl KTHf H TB -diitt.i hV r W Br
atenraiiRa :aL
93 0 V J J
3 "
1S5. )
OlAsft-Fsper i tie State. J
Werrras SrfFerirs-Tfce Great European Esa
ed7-Dr.J.B.Sir:pan'2 Specific Medicine.
ItlsapoxltlYeeaxofarBperraatorrhea, Seminal
weakness. Irapoteaey, and all disease resaltlag
from aelf-aboteju skfobe. atrs.
mental anxiety,
lost or memory.
Pains In Rack or
side, and diseases
that lead to con-inppUon4nsanl-
xj ana an rarij
jrave. The Spe
cific Medicine Is
belns tued -with
wonderfal sneeess. Paraphleu sent free
iX. IaI. Sem nd fall particulars. Price.
.P??nc ''.-P0 p?r Packace. or ttr padtaKeafor $5D0
Addrew all orders to J.H.SIilPSON MEDICIKE
9:I0H?I", J06- Min . Bofflo. 2f . T.
3"SoldlnRrornrtHeor a. W.2!lekell,8yl-al
1EI. ABKWBIGHT,
WATCH MAKER,
90 Main Street,
BROWJNViJLLS, - NEB,
Takes tais opportunity to
Tliuuk the People of Brown
vlll'e and Xemaha County for
their Liberal Patroange dur
ing the past year, and solicits
a continuance of their favors.
Having now & choice, new.
sMHMiMnaKanMHmsBBUKanMssWBBBEB
stock, of Watche, Clocks and
Jewelry at prices that cannot
be discounted anywhere. Call
and See. Stages and Express
es pass the door-; get the con
ductor to put you down at 90
Mala St., opposite Lowman's.J
T. A. Bath. Joseph Bodv.
BATS BODY
proprietors
C!T! 1E1T HRIET.
are now prepared to accommodate
the pnbllc with
Good, Sweet, Fresh
Highest market price paid for
JB eef . I i.ijcLagJ
-AND
T-A.XiZJ0"Vr.
First door east of P.O. Brownville.
VUTIIOBIZED BY TnE C. S. G0VEEX2IEXT.
irst National Bank
OF
STi,OWJSTrLlL.TJJEl.
Puid-vp Capital, $50,000
Authorized " 500,000
IS PREPARED TO TRANSACT A
General Banking Business
BUT AND SELI.
GOIff & OUEEENOY DEAFTS
on all the pri .cipal cities of the
United States and Europe
MONEY LOANED
On approved secnrlty only. Time Drafta-disconnt
d. and spedalaccnrnmodatlona granted to deposit
rs. JDealers in GO VERXMENT BONDS.
STATE, COUNTY & CITY SECURITIES
DEPOSITS
Received payableon demand and INTERESTa!
lowed on time certificates of deposit.
DIRECTORS. Wm.T. Den. B. M. Bailey. H.A
Handley. Frank E. Johnson, Letter Hoadley
Wa. Fraisaer.
JOHN L. CAKSOX,
A. R. DAVISON. Cashier. President.
I. (XMeS AUGHTON. Asst. Cashier.
ESTABLISHED IK 1856.
OLDEST
EEAL
ESTATE
. A.&E3SFOY
XIV NEBRASKA.
WiHiam H. Hoover,
Does a sea era! Real Estate Busin esa. Sells
Lands on Commission, examines Titles,
makes Deeds, Mortgages, and all Instru
ment pertaining to the transfer of Real Es
tate. Has a
Complete Atistraot of Titles
to all Real Estate la Nemaha Cbnnty.
UPHOLSTERING HD dlHG
Neatly and promptly done hy
MIKE EEI.THATJSER,
CABINET MAKER, and
CARPENTER and JOINER
Shop 3 doors east of Post Office.
BRO'WSrVZIil.E,
NEBRASKA
ESTABUSHED
to all
'-w--rrry -'
Half-ay Doin's.
Belnbbed fellow trabellers: In holdin' forth
to-day.
I doesn't qnote no special Terse for whnt I
has to say.
Da sermon will be very short an' dis here
am de lex ;
Dat half-way doln's ain't no 'count for dls
world or de nex'.
Bis worl' dat we's a llbbln In Is like a cot
ton row.
Where ebery called gentlemen has got his
line to hoe;
.And ebery time a laxy nigger stops to take
his nap,
Degress keeps on a growln' for to smndder
np his crap.
When Moses led de Jews acrcst de water ob
desea.
Day bad to keep a goln' Jea as fas' as fas'
could be;
Do yon s'pose dat dey conld ebber bab suc
ceeded In delr wish.
And reached de Promised Land at last, if
dey had slopped to fish?
My frlen'e, dar was a garden once whar Ad
am 11 bed wid Ebe.
Wld no one 'round to bodder dem, no neigh
bors tar to thieve.
And ebery day was Christmas, and dey got
delr rations free.
And eberyting belonged to dem except an
apple tree.
Ton all know 'bout de story bow de snake
come snoopln' 'roan'
A stamp tall, rusty moccasin, a crawlln' on
de ground
How Ebe an' Adam ate dc fruit an' went an
hid delr face,
Till de angel oberscer he came an' drove
'cm off de place.
Now, s'pose dat man an "oonan hadn't
'temted for to shirk.
But had gone about delr gardenia', and
'tended to delr work,
Dey wouldn't hab been loafln' whar dey had
no business to. ""
And dedebbll nebber'd gota chance to tell
'em what to do.
So half-way doln's, bredren ! It'll neber do
I say.
Go at your task an' finish It, an' den's de
time to play ;
Forebeu if tie crap Is good, de raln'U spile
de bolls.
Unless you keeps a pickln' In de garden of
your souls.
Keep a plowln' 'an' a hoeln' on a serapln'
ob de rows.
And when de ginnln's ober yon can pay np
what yon owes :
But if you quits a workln ebery time de
sun Is hot,
DeJsherlfTs gwyne tolebbycn ebery thing
yon's got.
Whatebr tli you's drlbln' at, be sure and
drlhe ll troo.
An' don't let nnffla' stop you, but do what
you's gwlne to do;
For wheqypp jiee a n!czcrIoQllnZ.den,ihore,J
You's gwyne to see blm come out ob de
small end oh de horn.
I thank you for de'tentlon yon has gib dls
afternoon
Sister Williams will oblige us by a raisin'
ob a luue
I see dat brudder Johnson's 'bout to pass
aronn' de hat.
And don't let's hab no ball-way doln's when
it comes to that.
By Irwin RtutelL
HILDA'S EXPIMMEET.
It "was a tempestuous night in No
vember,. The carved Dutch clock in
Judge Harrison's study had just struck
9. Judge Harrison himself, an austere
looking, silver-haired man, sat upright
in his chair, gazing coldly at his guest.
"Well," said Dr. Hooper, pulling on
his gloves, "of course it isn't for me or
any one else to interfere infamily mat
ters. But your grandchild is left to
tally unprovided for, sir."
"I cannot help that," said the Judge,
frigidly. "Eight years ago I offered to
support the child, and the father, too,
if he would only consent to leave that
outlandish foreign wife of his. He
inarned her against my will ; he clung
to her against my will. Let him abide
by his decibion."
"It's only natural, Judge, that a man
should cleave unto his wife," urged the
doctor.
"It is only natural, then, that a man
should provide for the child of that
wife, Dr. Hooper. At all events, I
shall assume no -further responsibili
ty." "But, Judge Harrison, vou are a rich
man!"
"Granted but, as Lmade my money
myself, I feel that I-have a right to
spend it to suit myself."
"Hilda is a fine girl," pleaded Dr.
Hooper.
"No doubt, no doubt; but yon will
pardon me if I feel no very great
anxiety to see the child of the German
singing woman who stole my son's
heart away from me."
Dr. Hooper hesitated.
"Judge," he said at last, in a tone of
appealing earnestness, "you have an
other granddaughter."
"I have. My daughter's child, Ma
rian Lennox, makes her home with
me."
"And yet yon would deny a similar
home to Hilda Harrison?'
Judge Harrison's shaggy white brows
met in a straight, frowning line.
"Doctor," said he, "you will fail to
make the distinction between a dutiful
child and one who has been unduti
fuL" "Let me see JMiss Lennox," said Dr.
Hooper. "Let me interest her in the
fact of this desolate, unknown cousin.
She has a woman's heart in her bosom.
I am sure I can move herP
Judge Harrison smiled coldly as he
touched a small gilded call-bell which
stood on the table beside him.
"Send Miss Marian here," said he to
a servant, and the man noiselessly
obej-ed.
In another minute a tall, Princess
like girl stood in the room a girl with
hair of pale gold, deep blue eyea, like
azure stars, and a dress of soft blue
silk that fell in picturesque folds about
her, and trailed noiselessly over the
carpet as she walked.
"Marian," said the Judge, "this is
Dr. Hooper. He has come here to plead
the cause of your Uncle Severn's
daughter Hilda. Severn deliberately
disobeyed me at first in marrying HQ
dergarde Boehmer he rejected the of
fer I afterward made of taking him and
the child home, if he would but leave
the siren -who had blichted all hi lifn
'Now he rs dead, and has left hia child
BROWK VILLE, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, JUNE
unprovided for.
so let hi3 child
I say, as he Las sowed,
reap. TTnat do you
say?"
"I think grandpapa is quite right,"
said Marian, in a soft, sweet voice.
"Grandpapa is always right r
"Then you have no word to speakfor
this lonely little orphan?" cried out
Dr. Hooper, deeply indignant. Marian
laid her ringed hand upon that of her
grandfather and nestled close to him.
"I always defer my judgment to that
of grandpapa " she said and Judge
Harrison, passing his arm around the
girl's waist, looked with ill-concealed
triumph at the luckless special pleader.
Dr. Hooper bowed, spoke his adieus,
'and departed.
"When he returned to his own humble
residence, a dark-eyed girl met him at
the door,
"Have you seen him, doctor my
grandfather?" she cried, eagerly.
Dr. Hooper nodded.
"It's of no use, though," said he.
"The old man has a heart like granite;
and the .girl, your cousin, is of cast
iron."
"He will not take me?"
"Xo."
Hilda Harrison set her lips together.
""Well," said she, "then I must man
age to provide for myself.
"Xo hurry, lass; no hurry," said the
kindly little doctor. "Go tell the wife
to bring me a cup of hot coffee before I
start out again."
"Hilda," he said, presently, as he sat
toasting his feet before the fire, with his
wife knitting opposite, and Judge Har
rison's granddaughter leaning against
the window and looking out into the
stormy darkness, "what are you going
to do?"
"I don't think I quite know, doctor."
"You are 16?"
"Sixteen and a half, sir."
"And vou cannot teach?"
"Oh, dear, no, sir!" Hilda shook
her head decidedly. "I had no chance
for much education, traveling about as
I did."
"Xor sew?"
"2sot well enough to adopt it for a
profession."
"Then, for all I can see, there is
nothing left but to go into domestic
service."
"I would take a place to-morrow.
doctor, if I could get a good home and
decent wages," said Hilda, quickly.
"Good," said Dr. Hooper. "That is
the right spirit, child ! I don't fear but
what you'll make your way, in one di
rection or another. But I think I can
see something a little more promising
ahead for vou than that"
""What is it, doctor?"
"I noticed the way you took care of
your poor father, Hilda, in his last ill
ness. I thought then that you would
make a good nurse I think so now.
There is an opening in St Prancesca's
Hospital. A good home and Si a day."
"As nurse, doctor?"
"As nurse."
"And I Should See VOn-eoaiaUnaooy
"frequently twice aweeTTaTleast."
Hilda pondered a second or two, and
then come forward with glistening eyes
and red iips'apart
"Doctor," said she, "I will try it."
And so Clement Harrison's grand
daughter donned the little muslin cap.
print dress, and white ruffled apron of
tue ot. x rancescan corps 01 nurses, anu
set diligently to work earning her own
living.
A year passed by, and Dr. "Wallace
sent word that a nurse was wanted for
a small-pox case in the city. She Sister
Superior of the St. Prancescans looked
dubiouslv at her women.
""Who will go?" said she and Hilda
Harrison stepped forward.
"I will," said she. "I have no fears
of the contagion, and I want to add to
my experience."
So little Hilda packed her bag and
went
The housekeeper of the great Pifth
avenue palace was ringing her hands,
half terrified out of her senses; the
other servants had taken precipitate
leave.
"And Miss Lennox went this morn
ing," said she. "I should think she
might have stayed."
"Who is Miss Lennox?" questioned
innocent Hilda.
"The old gentleman's granddaughter
that he had brought up and petted like
a cosset lamb," said Mrs. Hurst "Oh,
the ingratitude of some folk. And if
Judge Harrison dies "
Hilda looked up quickly from the
bottles of carbolic acid she was un
packing. "Is this Judge Harrison's house?"
said she.
Why, of course it is." answered
Mrs. Hurst "Didn't vou know ?"
"No I did not know," Hilda said.
"But of course it makes no difference
whose house it is."
"Who are you?" Judge Harrison
asked, hoarsely, as the light foot cross
ed the threshold.
"I am the nurse from St Prancesca's.
Thev call me Hilda."
"Hilda what?"
"Never mind my other name," said
the young girl, with a gentle authority
that had come to her from months of
practice at weary sick-beds. "They
call me Hilda; and you are not to talk
and excite yourself."
"Do you know you are running a
great risk?"
"It is my business to run risks."
Three weeks elapsed. The crisis of
the disease was past. The old man,
weakened indeed, and sadly disfigured,
was able oncemoreto sit up in hiseasv
chair; and Hilda, who had watched
over him with a vigilance and tender
ness which he fully appreciated, was
arranging fresh flowers in a vase on the
table.
"Hilda," said he slowly, "where has
my granddaughter Marian been all this
time?"
"She went awaj, sir, when you were
first taken ill She was afraid of the
disease.
"And she left me?"
"And left you, sir."
"There was gratitude!" he muttered
hoarsely. "And when is she comins:
back?" b
Hilda laid down her roses, and look
ed with pathetic, feeling eyes at him.
"She will not come back at all, sir,"
she answered. "We dared not tell you
before, but but her flight was in vain.
She died of small-pox. last week."
The old man turned away with u
smothered groan.
"Hilda," baid he, "you will stav with
me? You -will not leave mealnne?
Nay, do not speak. I know who vou
are. I recognized your name when you
with your father's eyes many a time
TTiWs T i;t,i. r-j -C J -
-tXUOa, A UUnK IrOd has" sent yOU
tome.
"Oh, grandpapa I" And Hilda knelt
weeping beside his chair, scarcely able
to believe that his loving arms were
around her neck; his tears dropped on
ner Drow. "un, dear, dear, grandpapa!
I have so longed for some one to love
for some one to love me!"
And good little Dr. Hooper was well
satisfied with the result of Hilda's ex
periment at earnine her own livintr.
"Heaven manages these things better
man we do," thought he, as he remem
bered his attempt at softening Judge
Harrison's flinty heart morethanayear
before.
Hsveii Tears a Bum-Seller.
Boscoble(Wh.)DiaL
Mr. Stacy relates what he saw and
heard in his Sixth avenue dripking pal
ace: S
"I have seen a man take his first
glass otliquor in my place who after
ward filled a suicide's grave. I have
seen man after man, wealthy and edu
cated, come into my palace, who now
cannot buv his dinner.'
This was the beginning of an address
of S. Stacy, before the Cadets of Tem
perance, mere lads, who sat clothed in
their bright regalia of blue and red in
long rows on the settees in Franklin
Hall, in South Brooklyn. The meeting
was held under the auspices of the
Sons of Temperance, and it had been
announced that Mr. Stacy, having giv
en up his drinking place in Sixth ave
nue, New York, would give his per
sonal experience.
"For eleven years I sold liquor," he
said. '1 had one of the handsomest
saloons in New York. Some said it was
the best saloon in the city. If it was
the best, God help the poorest I can
recall twenty customers, each worth
from S100.000 to S500.000, and only
two of them now are able to buy din
nerrfor themselves. To you, Cadets
of Temperance. I would advise that
you take rather a glass of prussic acid
than a glass of liquor. If you must
die, it is better to die at once. If a
Gospel friend ever takes you by the
arm and seeks to restrain you from
drinking, don't turn and say to him:
"I know what I am doing. Be kind
enough to mind'your own business.'
"I have seen young men stand at my
bar with this blue ribbon on the lapels
of their coats drunk. "No, no,' these
young men would say, "I've taken the
pledge; I'm obliged to you all the
same.' They had no business there.
Mr. Stacy raised his voice. This was
not their place. Liquor is at deadly
enmity with a blue ribbon. Prettv
soon it would be: "Well, I'll take a
glass of cider. I knew I knew I
knew I knew what that glass of cider
meant
"The rum seller is a good fellow.
He's liberal with his money. He's jov
ial. When a customer enters his door
he says: "Hello, Johnny; where have
VOUbeen. thesn twn nr thrpp ftarRV
"But bea ealculatiifcrall -the time how
much money the customer has in his
pocket and how much of it he can put
into his till. Jde is a thief. He takes
money for which he gives no benefit
in return.
"In all my eleven years behind the
bar I can recall only one agreeable
thing. A young lady came to me and
said: "I wish you would not give
father any more to drink.' I laughed,
as rumsellers are accustomed to do in
such cases, but she persisted, and final
ly 1 promised I wouldn't let him have
any. I don't know what possessed me,
but I promised. When next the father
came in he walked up to take a drink.
"No, sir, not here,' said I. "What?'
said he. I repeated what I had said
and also ordered my barkeeper never to
let him have drink on pain of dismis
sal. The result was a quarrel, and I
threw him out into the street. He was
a smaller man than I. There was a
struggle outside the door, but as he
rolled over the curb at the edge of the
sidewalk he seemed to lose all his
strength. Looking up to me, he said:
"Here I am in the gutter, and turned
out of a Turn shop!'
"That man to-day is a member of Dr.
Armitage's church.'
Domestic Oilcloth.
In answer to inquiries made some
time ago how to make domestic oil
cloths for floors, I will give you my
mode. I take old rag carpet, not total
ly worn out, but faded and dingy, have
it washed clean, dry thoroughly-, then
make it the desired length. (I have
mine three yards long.) Hem or bind
the ends, then tack the pieces upon
some smooth surface. I tack mine up
on our large barn doors, fasten secure
ly at each end with tacks, then have
ready a gallon pan of starch, made of
flour, as you would for starching
clothes ; take a whitewash brush, brush
thoroughly over the pieces with this
starch; make it thick enough to fill up
all places among the woven rags, then
let them dry thoroughly; then next
day give it a coat of paint; let that get
thoroughly dry; give another coat, and
you have a nice piece of oilcloth. I
generally have mine painted a light
brown. About fifty cents' worth of
paint "will make three strips three yards
long. I have used this kind of oilcloth
for years around my kitchen stove.
Mrs. J. JLf. Mice, Lamville, Illinois, in
IntetzQcean.
Admiration.
Every man of sense and refinement
admires a woman as a woman; but
when she steps out of this character, a
thousand things that in their appropri
ate sphere would be admired become
disgusting and offensive. The appro
priate character of a woman demands
the delicacy of appearance and man
ners, refinement of sentiment, gentle
ness of speech, modesty in feeling and
action, a shrrking from notorietv and
public gaze, aversion to all that is
coaree and rude, and an instinctive ab
horrence of all that tends to indelicacy
and impurity, either in principle or ac
tion. These are the traits which are
admired and sought for in a woman.
Baby Prizes, 8600.
An eminent renter's wife of N. Y.,
has induced the proprietors of that great
medicine. Hop Bitters, to offer S600 in prizes
to the youngest child that says Hop Bitters
.plainly, in any language, "between May J,
18S0,andJnlyi, 1331. This is a liberal and
interesting offer, and everybody and his wife
should send two cent stamp to the Hop Bit
ters Mfg. Co, Rochester, N- Y..TJ. S. A., for
circuit., giving juji parusaiars, anu negin
t nnee to teach th rhJ?rtnn tn.-a TTnr, "mt
J ters and lecuxe the prise.
Itirat
17, 1880.
The Vacation of Mustapha,
Bob Bnrdette In Hawkeye.
Now in the sixth month in the
reign of the good Caliph, it was so that
Mustapha said, 1 am worried with
much work; thought, care and worry
have worn me out; I need repose for
the hand of exhaustion is upon me,
and death even now lieth at the door."
And he called his physician, who felt
of his pulse and looked upon his tongue
and said:
"Two dollahsl" (for this was the oath
by which all physicians swear) "Of a
verity thou must have rest Flee unto
the valley of quiet, and close thine eyes
in dreamful rest; hold back thy brain
from thought and thy hand from labor,
or you will be a candidate for the asy
lum in three weeks."
And he heard him, and went out
and put the business in the hands of
the clerk and went away to rest in the
valley of quiet And he went to his
Uncle Ben's, whom he had not seen
for lo! these fourteen years. Now,
his Uncle Ben was a farmer, and abode
in the valley of the rest, and the moun
tains of repose rose round fabout him.
And he was rich, and well favored.
and strong as an ox, and healthy as an
onion crop. Oftimes he boasted upon
his neighbors, that there was not a
lazy bone in his body, and he swore that
he hated a lazy man.
And Mustapha wist not that it was
so.
But when he reached his Uncle Ben's,
they received him with great joy and
placed before him a supper of homely
viands, well cooked and piled up onhi3
plate like the wreck of a box car. And
when he could not eat it all, they laughed
him to scorn.
And after supper they sat up with
him and talked with him about rela
tives whereof he had never, in all hia
life, so much as heard. And he an
swered their questions at random, and
lied unto them professing to know Un
cle Ezra, and Aunt Bethseda, and once
he said tliat he had a letter from Uncle
George, last week.
Now they all knew that Uncle George
was shot m a neighbor's sheep pen,
three years ago, but Mustapha wist not
that it was so, and he was sleepv and
only talked to fill up the time. And
then they talked politics to him, and he
hated politics. So about one o'clock in
the morning they sent him to bed.
Now the spare room, wherein he
slept, was right under the roof, and
there were ears and bundles of ears of
seed corn hung from the rafters and he
bunged his eye with the same, and he
hooked his chin in festoons of dried
apples, and shook dried herbs and seeds
down his back as he walked along, forj
it ts utter. Ana wnen ne sat up
in bed in the night he ran a scythe in
his ear.
And it was so that the four boys
slept with him, for the bed was wide.
And they were restless and slumbered
crods-wise and kicked, so that Mustapha
slope not a wink that night, neither
closed he his eyes.
And about "the fourth hour aftpr
midnight his Uncle Ben smote him on
the back, and spake unto him, saying:
"Awake, arise, rustle out of this and
wash your face, for the liver and bacon
is fried and the breakfast waiteth. You
will find the well at the other end of the
cow lot. Take a towel with vou."
When they had eaten, his Uncle Ben
spoke unto him, saying, "Come let us
stroll around the farm."
And they walked about eleven miles.
And his uncle Ben set him upon a
wagon and taught him how to load
hay. Then they drove into the barn
and taught him how to unload it.
Then they girded up their loins and
walked four miles, even into the forest,
and his uncle Ben taught him how to
chop wood, and they walked back to
supper. And tfie morning and the ev
ening were the first day, and Mustapha
wished that he was dead.
And after supper, his uncleBen spake
once more and said, "Come, let us have
some fun." And so they hooked up a
team and drove down to Belcher's
Branch where there was a hop. And
they danced until the second hour in the
morning.
When the next day was come, which
wasn't long, for already the night wa3
far spent, his Uncle Ben took him out
and taught him how to make a rail
fence. And that night there was a
wedding, and they danced and made
merry and drank and ate, and when
they went to bed at three o'clock,
Mustapha prayed that death might come
to him before breakfast time.
But breakfast had an early start, and
got there first. And his Uncle Ben
took him down to the creek and taught
him to wash and shear sheep. And
when the evening was come they went
to spelling school, and they got home
at the first hour after midnight, and
Uncle Ben marveled that it was so
early. And he lighted his pipe and
sat up for an hour and told Mustapha
all about the forty he bought last
spring of old Mosey Stringer to finish
out that north half, and about the new
colt that was foaled last spring.
And when Mustapha went to bed
that morning he bethought him of a
dose of strychnine he had with him,
and he said his prayers wearily and
took it.
But the youngest boy was restless
that night and kicked all the poison out
of him in less than ten seconds.
And in the morning, while it was vet
night, they ate breakfast And his
Uncle Ben took him out and taught him
how to dig a ditch.
And when evening was come there
was a revival meeting at Ebenezer
Methodist church, and they all went.
And there were three regular preach
ers and two exhorters and a Baptist
evangelist. And when midnight was
come they went home, and sat up and
talked over the meeting until it "was
bedtime.
Now when Mustapha was at home,
he left his desk at the fifth hour in the
afternoon, and he went to bed .at the
third hour after sunset, and he arose
not until the sun was high in the heav
ens. So the next day when his Uncle Ben
"would take him out into the field, and
show him how to make post and rail
fence, Mustapha would swear at him,
and smote him with an axe-helve, and
fled, and got himaelf home.
The champion egg-eater of the coun
try is a girl employed at the Georgia
-wjjcaiuer, j v,uo aie mxy raw
eggs in fifty minutes for a wager of a ,
calico dress and the valup. of the emrs.
HEggscellent. wretch; perdition catch!
our soul, bat ve den't love thee. J
VOL. 24 NO. 52.
The Troubles of a Poet,
Max Adeler.
While Colonel Bangs, editor of the
Argus, was sitting in his office one day,
a man whose brow was clothed with
thunder entered. Fiercely seizing a
chair, he slammed his hat on the table,
hurled hia umbrella on the floor and sat
down.
Are you the editor?' he asked.
Yes.'
'Can yon read -writing?
Of course.
'Bead that then,' he said, thrusting-at
the colonel an envelope with an inscrip
tion upon it
B ,' said the colonel, trvine to
spell it
That's not a B. It's an S," said the
man.
S; Oyes; I seel Well the words look
a little like 'Salt for dinner,' or 'Souls of
sinners," said the colonel.
No, sir,' replied he "nothing of the
kind! That's my name Samuel H.
Brunner. I knew you couldn't read.
I called to see you about that poem of
mine you printed the other day, on the
'Surcease of Sorrow.'
I don't remember it,' said the colonel.
Of course you don't, because it went
into the paper under the infamous title
of 'Smearcase To-morrow.' '
'A stupid blunder of the compositor's
I suppose.
Yes, sir; and that's what I want to
see you about. The way in which that
poem was mutilated was simply scan
dalous. Ihavn'tslept a night since.
It exposed me to derMon. People
think I am an ass. Let me show you.'
'Go ahead,' said the colonel.
The first line, when I wrote it, read
in this way:
'Lying by a weeping willow, underneath a
gentle slope.'
That is beautiful, poetic, affecting.
Now how did vour vile sheet present
it to the public? There it is! Look at
that! Made it read this way:
'Lying to a weeping widow to induce her to
elope.
Weeping widow, mind you! A wid
ow! 0, thunder and lightning I This is
too much! It's enough to drive a man
crazy!'
Tin sorry said the colonel, 'but
'But look a-here at the fourth verse,'
said the poet 'That's worse yet What
I said was
'Cast thy pearls before the swine and lose
them in the dirt.'
I wrote that out clearly and distinct
ly in a plain, round hand. Now what
does'.your compositor do? Does he
catch the sense of that beautiful senti
ment? Does it sink into his soul? No!
He sets it up in this fashion. Listen
C4?t thy pills before the sunrise and lovo
, them if they hurt.
"Now isn't thata cold-blooded outrage
on a man's feelings? I'll leave it to vou
kif it isn't'
'It's hard, that's a fact Baid the col
onel. 'And then take the fifth verse In
the original manuscript itsaid,plainiis.
daylight
Take away the Jingling money; it is only
glittering drooa
A man with one eye, and a cataract
over that, could have read the words
correctly. But your pirate up stairs
there, do you know what he did? He
made it read
'Takeaway thy Jerking monkeys on a sorely
glamtered hoss I"
By George, I felt like braining him
with a fire-shovel! I was never so cut
up m my life.
'It was natural, too,' said the colonel.
'There for instance, was the Bixth
verse. I wrote
'I am weary of the tossing of the ocean as It
heaves I
It is a lovely line, too; but imagine my
horror and the anguish of my family
when I opened your paper and sawthe
line transformed into
'I am wearing out my trowscrs till they're
open at the knes !'
That is a little too much! That seems
to me like carrying the thing an inch
or two too far. I think I have a con
stitutional right to murder that compos
itor; don't you?'
'I think you have.
'Let me read you one more verse. I
wrote
'I swell the flyins echoes as they roam
among the hills.
And I feci my soul awakening to the ecstacy
that thrills.'.
Now, what do you s'pose your miserable
outcast turned that into? Why, into
this:
I smell the frying shoes as they coast along
the bulls.
And I peel my soul mistaken In the erctary
that whirls.'
Gibberish, sir! Awful gibberish! I must
slay that man. Where is he?
'He is out just now, said the colonel,
'Come in to-morrow.'
'I will,' said the poet; 'and I will
come armed.'
Then he put on-his hat, shouldered
his umbrella and drifted off down
stairs.
The Heliograph in War.
A correspondentof theLondonZ)afy
News, in illustrating the value of the
heliograph in Afganistan, gives the
following account of the mode of using
it: "A ten-inch mirror and this is the
diameter of the ordinary field helio
graphis capable of reflecting the sun's
rays in the form of a bright spot, or
flare, a distance of fifty miles, the sig
nal at this interval being recognizable
without the aid of a glass. That is to
say, two trained sappers, each furnished
with a mirror, can readily speak to one
another, supposing the sun is shining,
providing their stations are sufficientlv
high, and no rising ground intervals to
stop the rays. The military heliograph
is a very simple matter. An army
ieu ea its Dase
station is placed
where a heliosraDh
and after travelimr i
some
with
miles, desires to communicate'
the stav-at-homes. a hill in !
the vicinity is chosen and a sapper as-
ueuus wiui nis neuograpn, which is
simply a stand bearing a mirror, swung
like the ordinary toilet looking-glass,
except that it swings horizontally and
it is also pivoted, so as to movp nr-)
pendicularly as welL Behind the mir- J "There goes the bell Plfbe left let
ror, in the very center, a little of the me kiss you fjood-bye, dear! and he
quicksilver is removed, so that the sap- was out of sight in an instant
per can go behind his instrument and A man across the aisle, who seemed
look through a tiny hole toward the j to know how mattera stood, looked at
station he desires to signal. Having i his watch and then called out:
sighted the station, by adjusting the! "It lacks twentv-two minutes of
mirror, he next proceeds to set up in 'train time" " iUiOUi' 0i
front of the heliograph a rod. and upon rn,.r . ,, , . ..
this rod is a movables stud. This stud ! ne. -wife rose up and walked to the
is manipulated like the foresight of a .tW. dear of the depot
rifle, and the sapper again standmrldlCOuIdid-r'7asiosloaaof
behind his InstnSentfSStt! ft So? her J ?,f ? J fack. Iauttfir;
justment of his stud until the hole m ru pi iam faT t&w rH return ur
the mirror, the stud. and the station
are in a line. The heliograph U ready
10 wore, ana in order to flash signals ao
that they may be been at JK2
the sarinm- hri nr.1-.- t9i. , tl
the mirror reflects, the ,SSSn fK
stud m front of Ma. .., .
THE ADVERTISER
FJLIKBKOTHEK . HACKXF,
ADVERTISING BATES.
0atl2eh.es ysar..
laebsseseedmc; lacs, par yr.
3
1Q
Osc Inch, per month-
Each adfiiUcnal lsch.persaatb.... ,.
Legal advertlsesesu atlagal rat Oaw iatt
(13 lines of NoaparJJ, or lHS)SrstlBMTt) ,1M8
each sabs equeatfcertion.ae
j&-JLUtrassltatadTciliSBSstjBft9t nH
forln advance.
OFFICIAL PAPER OFTHECOIISTI
g !' ISgBBBjigBBBBSBBgSHSesj
I
BOSS TOE FTvT MiUILg,
How a Tramp's Wish Was Gratified sad
HowH Utilised tfca Tea?
Detroit Free Press.
Soon after the dinner hour yesterday
a specimen tramp appeared at the door
of a house on John B. street, and be
fore he could be ordered off the steps;
he began:
"Sir, I am a tramp.'
"Yes, I see you are
"But I am not here to ask for either
food, money or clothing. I have just
had a bi;e, my clothes are good enough,
and if I had money I should get druak;
ana sent up
"Well, what do you want?
"There are four tramps down t&&
street and I know they'll call here. It
is now five years since I began travJ
ing around. I suppose I have Item
called a loafer and a thief and a dead
beat ten thousand times, and I feve
been shot at, clubbed, brooaisticked aod
scalded times- without record. Now I
want a change.'
"How?'
"Well, all I ask is that you let ae
represent your house when the traaps
come tip.'
This wa3 agreed to. He sat down
on the step3, removed his- hat, lighted
the stub of a cigar and was reading a
circular when the fourfellows slouched
up and entered the yard.
"What in Arkansas do you fellows
want in my yard?' exclaimed the tramp,
as he rose up.
"Suthin to eat, was the humble re
ply. "Something to eat! Why, you raiser
able, thick-ribbed cadavers, go and!
earn it, then! Do you suppose I have
nothing to do but keep a free hotel for
loafers?'
"Can't get work,' murmured the big
gest of the lot.
"Oh! you can't? Been looking all
around, I suppose? Everybody got all
the help he wants, eh? Want to bo
cashiers and confidential advisers, don't
you?'
"Nobody gives us a show,' growled
the third man.
"That's it! That's the cue! Nobody
will take you in with your old rags
and dirt and sore heels and weep over
you, and ask you to please be good, and
put you in the parlor bedroom and
feed you on chicken broth! How aw
ful it is that you can't be put on ice and
laid away where you wont melt!'
"Will vou give ua something? im
prudentlr demanded the fourth.
"Willi? Yon are just right I will!
Fll give you just five seconds to get
outside the gate, and I'll tell you in
addition that if I ever see you in thin
neighborhood again Pll tie you in bard
knots and hire a sore-eyed dog to bite
yon to death! Git up and git! Move on
hurry out with you!
. They strained out a3 fast 33 they-
could, and when they had turnedJSr-'1" """
corner the tramp put on his hot, put
out his inch cigar for another smoke,
and said to the gentleman:
"You have done me a great favor
and I am grateful; I already feel better
for the change, and I solemnly believe
that if I could only have got an excuse
to throw 'em over "the fence I should
have been ready to reform and start
out as a lecturer. Good by. I shall
never forget your kindneWi'
Going Away,
There isn't a day in the year but
what one can see just such a parting as
took place yesterday morning at the
union depot. Man and wife had come
down to the train which was to bear
her to her mother's. The husband had
fully persuaded her that her health
was failing, and that she ought to go
home on a six week's visit She
thought she felt even better than us
ual, but husbands know bent about
these things, of course. This wife
seemed to have made her preparation
quickly, and had not yet said what waa
on her mind to say. It lacked thirty
five minutes of train time, and as they
sat down in the waiting room shesaid:
"Now, Henry, the last time I went
away '
"Just wait I wantto see if that's our
train,' interrupts the husband as he
lose up. Going out he waa absent sev
eral minutes. When he returned she
was ready to say:
"I wanted to say to you that the
neighbora
"Did I give you the check for vour
trunk?' he suddenly inquired.
She found it in her pocket, restored
it, and began again.
"Of course I have confidence in vou.
but'
"Yourememberyoumustnot change
caw at the Junction, he said, as he
looked at his watch. "When you reach
there you will hear men yelling change
cats for this and that place, bnr, you
sit right still.'
"Haven't I been over the road four
different times, and don't I know all
the stations? Now, Henry, althouEh
there will be nobody in the house but
you, I have
"Did you forget that lunch basket?'
he excitedly asked, as he looked around
and under the seat
She had it on her Lip all the time.
As soon as she had assured him of its
safety she said:
"You now come from the ofice every
evening at six, and of course, I shall
expect '
"That's our train! he exclaimed, ns
he leaped up and erabbed for thsatch-
el.
"Dear me. but I wanted tns.iv to von
' she replied as shp foiinw-Pfi htm nnt
He rushed down to the depot and put
her aboard the coach as fast as possi
ble, but while arranging her seat, she
said:
N ow, Henry, I am going awav for
six weeks, but I want to sav thnr
texpecteoiy:
If vou would -row f i,v i.
r,ff!nSS ?L
It-VLr "tu uu W 0y
SSiffF.-lRftJ
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