Nebraska Newspapers

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THE ADVERTISER
THE ADVERTISER
G. TV. FAIBRStmtES. T. C HACHXE.
amrrrxiKSKtmrErr- TtCHAcrnnr.
?AIl5ROT3-R.&. HACKER,,
Pabllsners & Proprietors.
FAIRBROTHER & HACKER,
Publishers and Proprietors.
Published Every Thursday Morning
WiYUIVSlSKiG HATES.
Onrlaeli.ofte yesr -
.JIfrOO
AT BROWITVXLLE, NEBRASKA.
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One copy, three xaoitths
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BROWNVILLE, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, JULY 12, 1877.
VOL. 22. 1T0. 3.
READING MATTER OX EYEKY1MGE Oldest Paper in the State
OFFICIAL PAFEB OF THECOUXTI
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OPHGIAL DIKEOTOET.
Distriot Officers.
11. POUND
tfJ.S.HMITII
WILLIAM IL JIUUVKK-
A. OKOIL
JTudgo.
Utattiet Atturnoy
District Clerk.
LK'puty Clerk.
County Officers.
JATIVIB S. OIHJRCMI County JndRO
WILSON K. MAJOlfeS Uerk u Heoerdor
A. II. UILMOIUS Trffwurer
UAVllMOJf I'lASTUKtt aherllT
H. K. KBKMJUT. .
-Curonor
JAMKri M. ILACK1SK
JOHNIL SHOOK.
jatirvoyor
jonatilvn uiuaiNa. -.
J. IL 1'KEKY. j
.Ooiuads-loDora
City Officers.
J.S. STULI-..
.Mayor
K. E. KllHIOUT
J. B. DOOKKlt
w.r. itonmts
GEO. II. LASKO.V. .
.I ice Judge
Clerk
Trtasrer
Iarel
COOXOIL-CI-N'.
T. ItirilAItlrS. I
joski'ii iiour.
V'.A.JtTjKINS.
J. J. MICKCJiK, ;-
LKWIS HILL. I
C. NKIDUAltT. J
-let Ward
nd Word
3rd Ward
PROPESSIONiiX CARDS.
Q A. OSBORN.
O. ATTOUSEY AT LAW.
Office, Ki. 1 MUi street. HrowiiTlIc. Neb.
T I,. KCHIOK.
J. ATTORNEY AT LAW.
May be cofifcuUed In the German lun cuat;c. Of
llee axt d.r to Oouaty Clark's Office. Oonrt
IIiw6 ItulliMaK.Hrownville.Nebraska.
r s. STUL.L,.
Attorney and Counselor at Law,
Ofltco. over IHU's More. Urownvnie.yeb.
T H. BKOADY,
t) Attorney ad Connsolor at Law,
OBloeoveriStalu Hsnk.HrowuvllU .Net.
EV. THOMAS,
ATTOKKSY AT LAW.
OtSec . in front room over Shute'a Jevolry Store,
Urowavllle.Neb.
WT. ROGEUB,
Attorney and Onuarclor utliBW.
Will give dlUg-ent intention to anylee-lbalnesa
etrKteltihlcare. Office In Oourt Htaseltulld
lnp.llrownTille.Kcb. AH. HOL.Ii AD AY,
t I'h yalclau, Surgeon, Obstetrician.
Graduated in 1S1 Located tn Urosvnvlllo IrtW.
Special attention tsaid to Obstetrics and diseases
of Women andCbildreu. Omce.il ilain street.
nX,. MATHEWS.
PHYSICIAN AXD SURGEON.
Office 1 u Otty lruK Store, S .Main street, Brown
yllU.Noti PAT. CIiIXlT
FASIIIOXAULE
iinnm i xti tnT3 w & irno
bjT i'uui ax auuxj u.vn.iiv
CUSTOM WOIlK snade to order, and flw always
ranteed. ltftwiriuff iii-atly and nruinptly done.
p. No. -7 ilaln street. Jlrtwnvllie.Neb.
J W. GIBSON,
flLACILSSIITU AND HOUSE SHOEB.
Work done to order and satisfaction narsnteed
ITrat street, betnreea Main and Atlantic, Brow
vIlle.Neb. BIVE THiTOLD MAI A CHAKCE
'NCLE
(SEDORAS)
I)IE XJT-
Canned Frnlts, Candies, Tobacco, &z.
BllOWSTVllASE, - - - IxEBRASKA.
Caslijxx'uT for Butter &Eggs
TONSORIAL ARTIST,
3d door west Frst National Bank,
Hrownrille, - JVcbrasJca.
Shaving. WiRmpooiuc, Hair Cutting, &c,
tktH' In the highest style of the ort.
YOUH l'ATKONAOK SOLICITED.
A.. D. MAJRSBC3
TAT-LOR,
BROWNVIILE. sEBKASKA.
rnUing, or Cutting and Making, done to
order on short notice and at renbonable
prices, lias had long experience and can
warrant satisfaction. Cull at his shop at
renWency on Atlantic street,
ZAr BBOWKlLJLB TUB
LAST WBBKOFBACM
MOFTIT.
MATH
DENTIST,
HltOWNVILLE, XKBIIASKA,
MERCHANT TAILOR,
and dealer i
FineLmli-L, French, Scotch and Fancy Cloths,
Y ob tings, Etc, Etc.
Browiwlllc. Kebrnslta.
OLD BELIABLEEAT MARKET
BG3Y & BRO.,
BTJTCIIEBS,
imo:vn?Yrx.i,Es icsbraska.
Good, Sweet, Fresli Moat
Always on liaud, and satisfaction guar
antied to .all customers.
SLAVS "rou
wm m m
Having purchased the
as 3L. -a ? xc -a. sr cr 9
I wish to announce that I am prepared to
do a first clase livery business.
Josh Bogers
Tvr KTJ'rr. t-l V.T.TVTF'Ta
aqoh &lacksmithhop
ONE DOOR WEST OF COUIiT HOUSE.
WAGON 1rAKTNT3 Repairing,
Plows, and all work done ii tho best
ntannerandoauort notice. Sstlafactloo g-u-ra
-ed. aivebimacall. fW-ly.
Clocks, Watches, Jewelry
JOSEPH SPTOTZ,
Uo. 59 yn- Street 3ro"srxiTillo.
Keeps constantrr on band a large and well
assortd stock of sennlne articles in !b lino.
BepairlK of Clocks. Watches and Jewelry
done oa short notice, at reasonablerates.
ALL WORK WAHRA27TSD.
Cheap Suns for the People,
IoBble Shot Gons, frexn S7 to ?M. Breecb Load
1 Shot Onns. rrom SZ5 to fl50. Single Shot Guns,
all kinds, fa k . Bifies. iluzzle and Breecb
XoodinK.Staxlfand RepeatlnR. 7, 16 and 31 sboot
en. BovolverB. s.fiand 7 shooters. ? to f30.
Goods sent by Express C O. !.. with prtvlleae to
eza-iiae. Prto list tree AWree. Great Wost
ru Pan "V'etkiocurshi Pert. lrr
i if 11-5-81
EWS
ssKfsr
III T T Fl
- J""i 10 1 I B
s?5 nut tie
iIlJilllL.ll 1
I IVCPVIPil Kf fl vTsPl l-v
LlVLiiI Ahll ruu dlAifLu
MjssMmmmamim
Tlie Dream.
I waited formy flarllngall through theSnm-
iner noon ;
The criniMm flarno of snngot came, and then
the silver moon J
And, hearing not in ellenoo deep n bird or
bloHsom stir,
I laid me down and Blumbcrod, that I might
dream of her.
in sweet and simple boanty, with bludh tho
breezes tfavo.
As lithe as willow bonding bosldo the wimp-
llng wave,
Bho rises 'mid Bleep's darkness, like star
throngh mist that shines,
Orfairy liowor in branching bower among
the forest pines.
Thosprlng Is laughing from hor lip, thoSum
mer warms her breast.
Upon hor head tho darkling stloe oi cloudy
Autumn rest.
While WIntor takes hor tiny hand aud cov
ers It with snow;
Yet warm and soft Its tender touch! Iy
happy pulses glow!
Alas ! tho joy is fading, the lovely faco grows
dim,
Tho vision bright, the rosy Ught, In ming
ling shadows swim,
But o'er me bond delicious smiles, and eyes
with love that beam ;
Her own bright self has broken tho Image in
the dream!
THE BEST BED.
The district Bohool iu the villiage of
Holiythorn was taught by Mifi3 Eva
Stanley, who "boarded around"
among the scholars, and was consid
ered the paragon of tuaohers.
The last week previous to the holi
day vacation she had been boarding
with a Mrs. Carpenter, who was mak
ing gigantio preparations for guests
she expected from New York.
"You never met my brothers, Eva,
eaid she. "There's Sam, and Georgie
and Johnny, the youngest; and such
limes as they have whon tho3T get out
here and rusticate, as they call it!
But dear me, I dont get much rest or
peace, for they are like a lot of boys
let out of school.
"The last time they visited mo to
gether, John and Sam actually cut
a pane of glass from the window, end
pelted George from my beet room
with Enow !
"You see, there is always a regul-rr
strife for that particular room for the
bed is a spring one, and they Bay
they don't sleep on any other in the
city. But they don't get it this time,
that's certain, fori Intend to give you
that room, and so end the controver
sy." "I had -just-as-ssooniDccapy aae
other room. Mrs.. Carpenter, and do
not wish to incommode
your
broth
ers
11
"Sb you shan't, Eva," peromtorily
exclaimed her hostess; "and what is
the use of your going homo vacation
week ? You can Btay here just as
well as not, and do your sewing on
my machine."
The subject was dropped, and the
entire household retired early, for on
the morrow the brothers, young ar
dent and full of life were to be there.
But without sending any word of
the intention, they have concluded to
take the train which would laud them
in Holiythorn about bed time. Geo.
and John did so, and when seated in
the cars began to speculate upon the
absence of Sam.
no reason in the world why he
should not have been there," said
George. "I can't make it 'out unles
he has taken the five-o'clock train by
mistake."
"Not a bit of it," laughed John,
who fancied he understood the entire
programme. It is moBt likely he took
that train on purpose to get into
Hannah's parlor bed room, and make
us take up with straw ticks and feath
ers." "I didn't think of that, but I reck
on you are right. We must contrive
to get him out somehow. "'
The brothers put their heads to
gether and laughed heartily over some
scheme for outwitting Sam, and ac
cordingly, when the train reached
Holiythorn, about 11 o'clock, they
approached the home of their sister
in a very stealthy manner.
Climbing tho fence In the rear, they
softly opened the window and obtain
ed access to the pantry, where they de
molished a whole mince pio and a
quantity of doughnuts. Then, with
appetites apeased, they removed their
boots and prepared to investigate the
"best room;' stole -along the hall,
which was dimly lighted by the
moon, ascended the stairs and reach
ed the door. The faint rays of tho
moon disolosed a chair piled up with
clothing, end they could distinctly
trace the outlines of a form boneath
the bed clothes. A few whisperc''
words wero exchanged, and iheu as
lightly as If shod with down the
drew near.
"All ready!" whispered George.
Quick a9 thought they seized ':pon
the form of the sleeper, bea-elothea
and all, bore it swiftly down tho
stairs and out into thesnow, and were
about to deposit it in a huge drift
when a shrill scream broke the still
ness of the night, and oh, horror; it
was that of a woman f And in their
consternation they dropped their bur
den plump into the middle of the
drift.
Good heavens !" eJolaimed George,
"it Isn't Sam, but some woman, as I
am a sinner, and she has fainted!
Bun and call Hannah !"
"With admirable presence of mind,
he lifted the limp form of Eva Stan
ley and carried It into the house. But
they had already been heard, and tho
inmates came rushing into the hall
just as ho appeared.
"George ! John ! for goodness sake,
what doe thin aeant and who have
v -MvS wfe"-' " ' "-. JESf:- v5fte" - -- Je:- - -&"" n .. t.z : s.mj,, , . - ? -M -,
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you there ?" asked Mrs. Carponter,
in 6 breath.
"Blessed if Iknow," began George;
"thought it was Sam, eo wo conclud
ed to givo him a douse in tho enow
for getting Into the best bed and try
ing to euohro us. Quick ! I believe
she has fainted."
"Just like you," scolded Hannah,
as Bho assisted in depositing Eva
onoo more In the bed from whioh
she had been eounceremonlously tak
en ; "beginning your trIckBupon each
other before you are fairly into the
houee. Clear out, now!"
long before she had finished her ti
rade, her brothers had betaken them
selves down stairs, where they went
into hysterics over the joke.
A pretty kettle of fish !" said
George, roliing over on -the floor, and
letting off peal after peal of laughter.
I should think it was," replied
John, holding his sld3. "Oh, ray !
But what Is to be done about it ; and
who do you suppose she Is, George ?"
"Some guest of Hannah's of course;
and young and pretty at that. I don't
know how It is with you, but I feel
particularly small and oheap would
sell myself at a very low price."
"Cheap," roared John, "cheap! I
would actually givo myself away this
blessed minute, and throw something
in to boot. What aro we to do? I
can't say. I believe I shall dig out of
this place and get back to the city be
fore morning. I haven't got tho cour
age to face the music."
Ho began hastily putting on his
boots, and would have carried his
threat into execution, but for the ap
pearance of Hannah, who at once as
serted hor authority.
"You are not going a single step,
John. I don't wonder you are asham
ed of yourselves. What on earth pos
sessed you, ismore than I can tell."
"That's right, Han; pitch in, scold
awa3' ; I'll take any amount of talk
ing just now. I am as meek as a
lamb. But who is it we've pla3'ed so
ohabby a trick on ?" replied George.
"Trick! I should think it whf.
Why It is Eva Stanley", our school
teacher, and this is her week to board
here. I don't believe the poor girl
will get over hor fright. It is too il ;
I shouldn't wonder if sho had taken
her death, being dragged out of a
warm bod this time of night, and
dropped into a snowdrift in that fash
ion. No wonder she cried, poor
thing."" - -
" Dried, didsheJ".rapeatediGeorge.,.
with a groan.
"I should think she did. I just
took her in my arms and let her have
her cry out, while I explained to her
how she happened to be mistaken for
Sam, and became the victim of your
mad pranks.
"Tihat was neat in you, Han," said
George. "I am awful glad you hug
ged the poor little thing. Wish you
had given hor a brotherly squeeze for
me "pon my honor I do."
"And how on earth do you expect
us to stay and take the consoquen
ces?" asked John, beginning to look
serious. "I am for taking myself off
Instanter. I had rather face a mask
ed battery than this pretty teacher,
after making such fools of ourselves."
"I don't care If you had," answered
his sister, indignantly. "The only
way to do is -to stay and brave it out,
both of you, and apologize for your
rudoness.
"But Sam ; how the deuce are we
to get along with him? You know
well onough, Han, we shall never
hear the end of it from him."
"If you two can keep the secret, I'll
find a way to silence Bridget, and It U
a subject Eva will not caro to have
uisuusaeu, anu iortunaieiy my uus
band is away from home. So go to
bed-and rest contented.
She showed them to the bed she
had intended thom to occupy, and
soon the house was once more hushed
in slumber.
Meanwhile, their brother Sam had
reached tho depot a few minutes too
late. He found the train ho was to
have taken, already gone, but en con
sulting o time-table he found that an
other train started two hours later,
and so decided to take it. He figured
to himself, as he impationtly crowded
into an empty aoat, and was being
whirled along at a rapid rate, how
snugly his brothers had ensconced
themselves in the best bed, which by
right belonged to liim, he being tho
eldest; and consummated a plan to
got even with thom.
come time alter midnight no was
doposited In Holiythorn, and reach
ing hia sister's house, he scouted
around till ho found a way of entrauoe
into the kitchon, where he deposited
his luggage and removed his boots.
Then he quietly stole up stairs and
opened the door of tho best room.
"Sure enough," thought he "my fine
chaps, you are In clover !" F jr there
were not to oe mistaken signs of the
room being ocoupied.
To think of coping with their unit
ed strength by dragging them forth,
was not practicable, but there stood
the pitcher of water and he knew that
a good dousing with ihe icy fluid
would bring them out quick enough.
He lifted the pitcher, approaohed
the bed, raised and suddenly dashed
tho contents upon the sleepers.
Suoh a torrent of eoreamB a3 he had
never before heard, rang through the
house, and before Sam- could colleot
his scattered senses, the door opened
and Hannah, George and John rush
ed in, clothed in seanty apparel
Hannah with a frightened look upon
her face, and a lamp In her hand that
revealed the ontire eoene.
There, sitting in bed, with her hair
dripping like s. ruermaidt her nh$-
dress deluged, her faoe colorless and
looking terror, was the young school
mistress; and there was Sam, with
the empty pitcher in his hand, tho
very picture of imbeoillty, staring
around like an idiot, at the havoo ho
had made. Hannah, George and
John instantly understood the situa
tion ; and tho latter, at tho command
of their sister, dragged Sam awny,
while she assisted the drenched and
terrified girl to dry clothing, and then
took her to her own room and bed ex
plaining for the second time, the mis
haps of the night.
"I'll keep you with me, now, my
poor ohild," said she, though with
difficulty keeping back her laughter.
"The boys are nicely come up with at
any rate ; and if it were not for you
being 6o terribly frightened and the
way my beBt bed has been used, I
wouldn't caro. But you are safe
now."
' Hannah kissed her charge, and
went down to see the boys, who as
soon as they wero fairly shut in tho re
gions below, began to appreciate the
joke ; and now that Sam was aB deep
in tho mnd as they were in the mire,
gave no quarter.
"I'll be be blamed if I know what
it all means," said Sam, looking in
confusion at his brothers, who woro
rolling and kicking in convulsions of
laughter.
"Means!'' said George, holding his
sides. "It means that you have stol
en liko n thief into Miss Eva Stan
ley's bod-ohamber, who is a young
lady teacher boarding hero ; and
thinking it was your humble servant
aud Johnny, snug in bed, you at
tempted to drown us out, and made a
grand mistake. How do you like it,
Sam ?"
"I confess I see the point, but I
can't see the joko, It is a most out
rageous shame."
At this juncture Hannah came in,
and began rating them soundly, there
by letting out tho wholo story. It
was Sam's turn to laugh.
Miss Eva was not visible tho next
morning,ond Hannah announced that
sho was sick with a severe cold.
Hannah had herunraly crew nnder
her thumb once in her life, and bad
the satisfaction of seeing
them be
have with some dignity. They ap
peared never to forget that thero was
an invalid In the house-, and went on
tip-toe about. Sam, who Beamed to
tuke tho entira.resporiaiblllty on his
own -shoulders, eont off' silly -to
oity for ohoice fruits and flowers,
which he Induced his Bister to convey
to the young lady with the most ab
ject apologies and regrets.
In a couple of days Eva was able to
come down Btairs. She was looking
quite pale, but lovely, and of course
divinely, when presented by Mrs.
Carpenter to the three brothers, who
behaved quite well considering the
unpleasantness of their situation.
But Sam, who had broken the ice
by means of hi3 presents was most at
ease, and by virtue of his age and ex
perience constituted himself the pro
pitiator, and was constantly on hand
to offer Miss Eva a thousand nameless
attentions; and before the week was
out John declared thatSom waB"done
for!"
"GoUb under completely !" echo
ed George with one of his dismal
groans.
Hannah, singing Eva's praises,
commended Sam's choice, and rec
ommended marriage to all of them as
the onty sobering process she was ac
quainted with. It is a pieoe of advice,
however, that they did not appear in
clined to follow, notwithstanding
Sam's happy lot with the pretty
schoolmistress of Holiythorn.
She often reminds her brothers-in-law
of her unceremonious introduc
tion to a snow-drift at the dead of
night, and they retaliate with the
shower-bath given her by Sam.
A Clcrgymau's Joke.
A olergyman, a widower, residing
in one of our Vermont Jural towns,
recently created a first-class sonsation
in hiH household, which consisted of
several grown-up daughtora. The
reverend gentleman was absent irom
home for a number of days, visiting
in an adjoining town. The daugh
ters received a letter from their father
which stated he had "married a wid
ow with sis sprightly children," and
that he might bo expected home at s
cor tain timo. The effect of thatnowB
was a great shook to the happy fami
ly. The girls, noted for their meek
nes and amiable temperaments, seem
ed another set of beings ; thero wu3
weeping and wailing and tearing of
hair, and all manner of naughty
things said. The tidy homo was neg
lected and when tho day of arrival
earau the house was anything but in
viting. At last the Bev. Mr.
came, but he was alone. He greeted
hia daughters aB usual, and as he
viewed the neglected parlors there
was a morry twinkle in his eye. The
daughters were nervous and evidently
anxious. At lost the eldest mustered
courage, and asked :
"Where is rnother?"
"In Heaven," says the good man.
"But where i3 the widow with six
children, which yon wrote yon had
married?"
"Why, I married her to another
man, my fleara."
It is Eaid to have been amusing to
see thcHO girls sot things to rights.
Speaking of the Independent press
(in.conneotion with the Chisholmmas
aaure, tho Indianapolis Journal makes
til fblteigiiig sensible and truthful re-
mark" : "It is the standing practice
of these papers to palliate tho atro
cious outrages perpetrated in the
South by pointing to some murder or
other violation of the law in the
North, and thus attempting to de
grade their own section to the low
level of communities where murder is
winked at by the authorities and de
fended by the press. This has always
been the retort of the Southern Dem
ooratlo press, and it is fitting that it
should be eohoed by a olass of papers
which, being too glad to belong to any
party, are consequently to proud .to
have any principles."
AN OLD STEAL,
Why it was not Mado J?nl)licLong Ago.
Spcoial to tho Chicago Tribune.
Washington, D. C, Juno 27. It
will be remombered that last winter
Blue Jeans Williams' commltteo on
Accounts conducted a secret investi
gation into an ulleged robbery of doc
uments from the House folding room,
under tho charge of the doorkeeper.
Thero were reports that the now Dem
ocratic employes of tho House, who
had just come into office and wero
hungry for Bpoils, had stolen a large
amount of books, but the truth was
never exaotly known, as a campaign
was pending, and it would never do,
for Chairman Blue Jeans Williams to
allow nny Democratic scandal to be
mado public. The evidence has beon
very carefully conooaled until now,
whon it appears that it was proved
before this committee that over one
thousand volumes of public docu
ments per month had been stolen from
the Houso document room. Among
thoso wero Congressional Becords,
Statistical Atlas, Medical and Surgi
cal History of the War, and general ly
the most valuable government books.
In ono room many cord3 of books had
entirely disappeared, estimated to
YKeish nine tons. The entire facts
v
have come into possession of the lie
publicans, and are a curious illustra
tn of Democratic honeaty and si n
ooritj'. The charges were originally
made against Doorkeeper Fitzhugh.
The evidenoe pretty conclusively
sBows that the books were stolen after
tie "bigger man than old Grant" re
Bfjrnsd his position. At all event?,
Bftahogh was shrewd enough to keep
aErinvoicoof the con tents of therooma
afc.bei'leVthom.-' This invoieo-does
br4i?grcfa'ithtieHesimotrydfthEr
person in charge of the room, who
wns examined by tho committee.
Twolvo different kinds of books have
disappeared. One kind lacked 4,000
of the proper number, another 700,
and another 400.
The Republican members of tho
committee would undoubtedly be
willing to 9tato that the testimony
was suppressed at the direction of
Blue Jeans Williams.
The Saratoga Insnlt to the Hebrews.
Arnold, the Historian, says that a
glass of water, thrown by the Duchess
of Marlborough on the gown of Mrs.
Masharn, changed the destinies of Eu
rope. It is a known fact that tho nod
of the cow-boy who acted as guide to
Bulow, Bulohor's lieutenant, shaped
the fortunes of Waterloo against the
French Emperor, and that the biting
of a greased oatridge, forced by British
Military discipline upon the native
troops of India, brought on the Sepoy
mutiny. It sIiowb what grave eonse
quences follow from apparently tri
fling circumstanoes. A far less Insult
than that offered to Mr. Seiigman by
Judge Hilton, at Saratoga, the other
day, compelled but recently an apoli
gy from England's Q.ueen to the Rus
sian Court. We do not expeet tbe re
public to be convulsed seriously by
the Saratoga transaction, or that Hil
ton's resort for the elite millionaires
and Gentile "Upper Ten" of Gotham
will be razed to the ground, or that
the successors to A. T. Stewart's busi
ness will be made bankrupt. But
what we do expect isthat the American
people will resent the iasult at Sura
toga as an insult offered not merely to
Mr. Seligman and hie family, but e
leveled through him at- 500,000 Jews
in tho United States, aud million's
more throughout tho world. If we
understand tho facts of the ease, it was
on the score of his Hebrew origin that
Mr. Seligman was expelled from the
Grand Union Hotel, a single aot that
tarnished forover the proud title of
that establisument, and awakens the
memory of thoso proscriptions in past
days against the Hebrew race, whioh
make up one of the darkest pages in
the history of Christendom. Ctnem
naii Gazette.
AroJiory Clabs.
Archery clubs of from seven to fif
teen members, both ladies and gentle
men could be formed all ovor the coun
try raoro easily, tbaH.crioket, croquet,
or base-bail clubs. The rules govern
ing such organizations should be few
and simple, not unlike those of rifle
olubs. Prizes could bo o fib red, and
medals of companionship adopted.
Once brought into public notioe and
fairly established, n,o sport or game
would be half eo popular or perma
nent. It ha In it all the elements of
desirable pastime and recreation.
Tho physical eseroise Is better than
fencing, boxing, or lifting ; it has ev
ery feature of an exoiting competitive
game, is attended with no danger, and
"shows off" th8 human form to tho
very best advantage, all itd pose- be
ing tho.e of grace, ease, and power
oombirtod. A lady whe has made
filHBiitoMfciJtti
borself "handy" with the bow never
looks bo well as when in tho act of
shooting. In England archery has
long beon cultivated by ladies and
gentlemen, and esteemed a fit sport
for tho gentlest and mo3t cultured
classes. Maurice Thompson inScrib
nerforJuly.
Signers of The Declaration.
Of tho flfty-3ix signers of tho Dec
laration of Independence, it is stated
that nine were born in Massachusetts,
eight in Virginia, five In Maryland,
four in Connecticut, four In New Jer
sey, four In Pennsylvania, four In
South Carolina, three In Now York,
three in Delaware, two in Rhode Is
land, one in Maino, three in Ireland,
two in England, two in Scotland, and
one In "Wales.
Twenty-one were attorneys, ten me
chanics, four physioiane, three farm
ers, one olergyman, one printer, six
teen were men of fortune.
Eight wero graduates ef Harvard
College, four of Yale, threo of New
Jersey, two of Philadelphia, two of
William and Mary, three of Cam
bridge, England, and ono of St. Om
ar's. At tho time of theirdeath, five wero
over 90 years of age, seven between SO
and 90, eleven between 70 and 80,
twelve between 00 and 70, eleven be
tween 50 and 60, seven between 40
and 50, one died at tho age of 27, and
tho ago of two uncertain.
At tho time of signing tho Declara
tion, the average age of the members
was 44 years.
They lived to tho average age of
more than 65 years and ton months.
The youngest member was Edward
Rutloge, of South Carolina, who was
in his 27th year. He lif ed to tho ago
of 61. The next youngest member
was Thomas Lynch, of tho same
State, who was also in his 27th yoar.
He was cast away at sea In the fall of
1776.
Benjamin franklin was the oldest
member. He was in his 71st yar
when he signed tho DsoJaration. He
lived until 1790, and survived sixteen
of his younger brethren. Stephen
Hopkins, of Rhode Island, the next
oldest member,, was born in 1707 and
died in 17S5.
Charles Carroll attained tbe greatest
age, dying in his 96th year. William
Ellorv. of Rhode Island died in his.
JSHstear --u, -a- .-..'nt-V
.irJwr-
" i- " -7ir ' ."""I"
The Hnked Truth.
A: noon yesterday s policeman
found a boy bathing in a slip near tbe
foot of Randolph street, and- he called
to the la'd to eotne out and be arrested
like a man for breaking the ordin
ance. "Is it agin the oiju nance for a boy
to fall into the river?" queried tbe ba
ther. - "No, air, but you are naked."
"Does the law say that a boy Has
got to have hie clothe? on when he
falls in?"
"The ordinance prohibits hathrnpr
here, and now you come out."
"Is it bathing when a fell or cuts
his foot on a pieoe of tin, knoeks hie
head agin a beam, and swallows foaH;
catfish and a gob of mud ?'
"I want you!" called the officer.
"What for?" called the boy.
"I command you to come out.''
"I can't come,' sorrowfully answer
ed tho bather. "The real truth is, I
jumped in here to rescue a-drowning
female, but her hair pulled ofT and
she's at the bottom. Aa I bays no
witness I dasn't go to trial."
"I'll bring j'ou out!" growled the
officer as he made for a boat. But tbe
boy disappeared aud was seen no
more. While tho officer was looking
under the wharf the half of a good
sized sand pile suddenly slid down
the baok of his neck and into his
boots, and a mu steal familiar voice
was heard saying :
"My shirt's on hind side a'fore,
breeches turned round, and this vest
is wrong end up, but I feel ae clean as
a new stamp from tbe poet office, and
Lor ! what an appetite I've got for
pop-oorn balie.'' Detroit Iree Press.
Til? Cet of War.
The war3 of thi century have been
the most bloody and ooslly since the
palmy days of Greece and Borao. For
its ten great bloody periods, viz., the
Napoleonic, Grecian, Crimean, Itali
an, Danish, Austrian (1S667, Brazil
ian, American, Abyssinian, and
Franco-German wars leaving oat
minor expedition and skirmishes tbe
figures foot up $38,667,680,800 expend
ed and 11,708,000,600 men destroyed
from J800 to 1B71. Two-thirds of this
aggregate outlay of man and money
are to be charged on tbe ledger to Na
poleon I. t:p to hia ckMisg battle,
fought at Waterloo.
A writer in a reeent article upon
railroads mentions the fact that a pon
a oertain railroad tbe deaths from
accidents for the year average one
man and seven-eighths of a man a
day. It is awful to contemplate what
a solitary life the other eighth the
surviving portion of the man has,
living all alone in this oold world.
Boston makes a very pretty show
ing in the divorce business for a city
which has beon wont in times pest t
congratulate herself that she was not
as other cities In this respect, and ea-
peoially aa tho cities of the West. Tho
dooket of the Supreme Court at its re-
cnt sion showed 700 easjas of to
qnast tot "porting asunder,' 400 of
which were stricken off or summarily
disposed of. Of tho remainder 00 aro
uncontested, and 100 will bo litigated.
It Is saddening to know that, spite of
the Prohibitory law, most of the pe
titions allege, as cause, gross and1 con
tinual intoxication.
X0SSESSE.
Arnica is good for a wrist sprain
ed in carving a spring ohlcken.
There was a manin Michigan,
"Who seemed to be nnlncky.
Ho tried to lift a mule's hind-log
And landed In Kentucky.
Why Is an old man's farm In
Texas like the focus of a sun glass?
Because it Is the plaoe where the sons
raise meat.
Somebody describee ayonng lady
as a person who kisses her gentlemen
friends till she is eight years old, and
then leaves off till she is eighteen.
If many Americans in their
youth had studied their geography as
earnestly eb they tried to learn smok
ing, they would not now locate Con
stantinople in Asia Minor.
Fashion has decreed that "pairs'1
must go out. Hereafter a lady may
appear with one whlto glovo, and on
the other hand one of black. Stook
inga are subject to the same rule.
Tho widow who sits by the vacant chair,
A combing her stranda of yellow hair,
"While her soul by trthought Is voxed ;
Not of the Bion who sat there last,
Not of tbe joys of the burled past,
But of who would Bit there next.
The Married Woman's Associa
tion propose to erect a statue in honor
of the husband who empties the wa
ter out of the basin after ho washes
his hands. But the association has
not found him yet.
A philosopher says: "It Is a mis
take to look in tho face for signs of
feeling ; tho real Boat of sensation is
within." We beileva -you are right,
my boy ; especially if tho individual
has boon eating green current pio.
JEaston Free JPress.
Fanny Davenport, the actress,
has been visiting Blaokwell's Island
to study misery. The Danbury Jtfewt
remarks that if she wants to contem
plate misery in its highest and broad
est sense sho Bhould watch a man pin
ning a fourteen-inoh collar ono fifteen
inch shirt-band.
Wo were cro3Bing an alley on
East Mansfield street when our atten
tion web called by some boys drum-
iming.-on -a: tight board lencc. Sud-
fdenly n IWtteellowMrithe'orrpcsito1
Bido on tip-toes called out, "Stop
your noiso, boys." "Hello, Tommy,
is that you?" said one of the boys.
"Yes, and we've got a new baby ; he's
orftil tired ; walked all tho woy from
heaven last night. Don't want any
row kicked up around here bow."
Crvwford (O.) Forum.
A modern novel it ceadeaeed
thus:
Vol. 7. a irtautBg wM.
A many satr!,
A.fetnr; '
A liar iHc.
A pleasant wU
Together.
Ve& IL AHiUedoa-.
A playful pott,
Caprlclotn !
A merry xnMB,
A stolen kiss,
Deitetoos!
Gossnlt papa.
With plnmtwre;
And both repent
ThH rush wresv
At leisure,
As a young man was looking
over a barrel of eggs received at a gro
cery on Newark avenue, Jersey City,
about a month ago, ho found the fol
lowing inaeriptiou upon one ef tbe
ggs:
If this yoe see, yong smui.
WrlVa Just aa sooa as yoe o3.
And let me bear frora my-fwertte eqg
ThH great boon I humbly beg. ,
Jllia Bai-jfjox, W'esttteld, Ohio.
The youth immediately wrote to
the address, inclosing bis photograph,
and received a reply and picture from
the writer of the lines. The corres
pondence was continued to the satis
faction of both persons, who are to be
married next month. It is said tbe
young lady is the daughter of a weal
thy farmer, and wrote tho linos h
jest, never expecting to beac froae
them. New York Tribune.
rne following story te loin as a
remarkable instance of the apprecla
tion af humor : A German soldier
was crdered fifty lashes for some al
1 edged set of insubordination. Fritz,
disciplined to silence, was fixed to
triangles in the presence of his com
pany. When the first lashes foil upon
his naked shoulders the worthy fellow,
instead of displaying evidences of die-
tress, burst into a fit of uncontrolla
ble laughter. The executioner, re
garding this manifestation as by no
means complimentary to his skill,
laid oa with redoubled ardor. But
tho more he laid on, the more Fritz
laughed. When cat down, he still
found great dlfSculty in restraining
his mirth, and indulged in loud, in
termittent guffaws. The officer in
command of the company, with a ou
rioaity naturally excited, approached
the bleeding wretch, and inquired tbe
cause of hia mirth. "Why," replied
Frita, breaking into a fresh fit
laughter, "I'm the wrong man !"
of
A man on West Hill has brought
peace into his family circle forover.
Last week ho moved into a new house
containing a bay window and twenty
three closets, and he bought hia wife
nlno mllea of olothes-line, a cord of
olothea-lino props, and 123 dozen
j clothea-pina. And the angela just
come down and 3ft arounrr-on the side
fonco and envy that womaa perfeet
i tiappine65. JBurhnmon Mcnotey.
r
- .-a,.--- - ...-"-.-- yjt-.r----8-ot:----- . .s-SeJLY-- - ... a..
to Breeders
horns.
of Short-
Thestock journals have too long re
mained silent upon some important
matters connected with the successful
management of Short-horns, possibly
for fear some one would feel aggriev
ed by plain words. Duty to the pnb
Ho should be paramount to every oth
er consideration, and from this stand
point of highest duty we want to talk
to our friends. ,.
In tho first.plaoe, the pedigree man
ia has'about run its race, and is so
nearly dead that we trust this year
will be the end of it. We do not mean,
to moke any assault npon the valaeof
pedigrees, nor would we detract In the
least from the Importance of a flrst
olass pedigree, whioh 1b nothing mora
than the history of a well-established
family, composed,of individuals of ex--oellence.
W-hat we mean by pedi
gree mania is .the willingness npon
tho part of a purchaser to take an in
ferior animal with an-extra pedigree,
rathorthan an extra animal with an
inferior pedigree. What is a pedi
gree worth, except as a guaranty that
every animal in the ancestry was an
animal of merit, and therefore the off
spring of the animal you propose to
purohase will bo uniform in type, and
valuable? But tho immediate parent
exerts far more influence over the off
spring than the remote, hence by fan
the most Important Individual in the
line of ancestry is the parent. If that
be an inferior animal, then tbe whole
pedigree Is vitiated' and it proves no
thing. If you still affirm that the an
cestry were superior, but thlB Individ
ual 1b an exception, then you virtual
ly assume that this lse, defective ani
mal, and henoe should go for beef. It
may bo Inferior from hidden disease,
or from inaufflolent food. In Its calf
life. In tho former caso It is unsound,
and should not be used as a breeder;
the latter Is a caso of inferior or Insuf
ficient aliment till It has affected the
development of the animal. In such
cases the digestive organs are perma
nently Impaired, or they have not
been developed to possess the power
they should. In no Instance, then,
should an inferior animal be used as a
brooder. Short-hornB aro so valuable
that everything Is being used for
breeding purposes, whioh does more
to injure the business with the better
class of farmers, than any other
thing. Attend1 tho sales, and ocoas-
r4-.T ylT."t.rtnVr . i Ua , vq whom tho
proprietor was unfortunate in his
herdsman, or was himself no mana
ger; a calf is led into the ring that in
merit is not worth over five dollars,
but it has a good pedigree, and sells
for five hundred. Thon the farmer
a ays, "There is something about this
that I do not understand." We wero
present at a sale this spring, and sat
jat in front of two gentlemen very
well knewn in Iowa, one a large far
mer and the othera lawyer. An in-
iferwr calf was led in. The farmer re
marked, "That calf is not worth ten
dollars." But it had a good pedigree,
and sold for $150.
"Ah !" says the lawyer, "tbab-
j-shows we do not know anything
Labout thte business." "It shows,"
quickly replied the farmer, "that tho
foots themselves do not know any
thing about it."
The point to be made is this wo
oannot afford suoh oritiotsm. The
great breeders of England made their
their reputation by breeding anc?
showing animals, in every way supe
rior to anything that could be pro
duced by any other man from any
other breed. It is true that some
times an animal breeds so entirely af
ter bis ancestry that he belies himself.
Sueh aa animal is aa exception, and
should sot be sold. Our position is
this : An inferior Short-horn should
never be sold. If it breeds better than
it looks, it shoald be kept as a breed
er, nnd'if it doss not breed any better
than it looks (as is generally the case)
it should be sokl for beef. Wexteni
Stock Jammed.
A Yirgi ilia Bell.
Th "Powhatan estate"" waa fbr two
hundred years the prepssty of the
Mayo family, and bora, as tile story
goes, John Howard Payne fell madly
in love, when in Riehmond, with
Miss Maria Maye (afterward Mrs.
General Winfield Soett), a famous
Richmond belie in her day, and re
markable for her wit and intelligence,
as well as for her extraordinary beau
ty. Poor Payne laid his heart at her
feet, but she is said to have toyed and
coquetted with it, and then to have
flung it aside. When all hope of win
ning the fair prise was abandoned,
Payne went to Europe, where he re
mained for nearly twenty years, and
where he wrote his "Home, Sweet
Home," which was first sung in his
opera of "Clare," at London. This
traditional ineident in the life of
Payne revives another (and one
still current in Riehmond) connected;
with' General Scott. It is said that
when be first addressed Miss Mayo,
he was only a captain in the regular
army, and his suit wa3 summarily
dismissed. Afterward, when a major,
he renewed the proffer of his hand,
but with no better success. The third
time he wore the epaults of a general,
3nd these prornply secured hia secsp!
aneo. When asked by one of her
friends why she had thue suddenly
changed her mind. Miss Mayo is safd
to have repplied : "in my estimation
there i3 a very deckled difference be
tween a captain, or oven a major, and'
general in the American army.'
!'crti,or Jw,
Plain TVords
sa