Nebraska Newspapers

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THE ADVERTISER.
"THE ADVERTISER.
Published every Thursday by
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Proprietors.
ADVERTISING KATES.
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SlISsilfeiHBI
ajco-No.74 McPhcrsoc's Block, up Stairs,
BROWNVILLE, NEBRASKA.
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RE VDIXG MATTER 0' EVERY PAGE
mmjc-- fj gf3-ai III Willi Mil !! I !! IH Mil
THE JHODEH.N-.UBETIN' HOUSE.
BJ WILL 8. HAYS.
Howdy. Davy! light an' bitch; thar's no
oue horaebnt m6;
Thar ain't a man a livin' sir, I'd sooner like
lersec;
For Nance snd Llddy's gone to see a sick
man on the hill,
jm' Hiram's gone to get his-grist at Jason
Turner's mill.
I was in town las' Sunday, an' my heart an'
me agreed
To go to meetlu'-cf you'll wait I'll tell you
what I seed:
The bells wor tolling lively on tho balmy
raornlu' air.
An folks wor In a hurry, like the rushln' to
a fair.
The meetln'-honse was built of stone, the
steeple pinted hlglif.
.The windows they wereljBtted aIltH j
nf iiAcir !MBfllH99IHMflB
An runnln' up the 6teeele was.
liirhtnin' rod
t vinder thought the members lacrced aeen
- : i
fidenee in God.
The bis bell sorter hushed hitselfand then
hit rung some more,
An' people come in carriages and got out at
t lie door;
Thewimmlii fixed their dresses like they
meant to make a call
Thar face- showed they warn'ta tulnkin' ov
Ih&r souls at all.
Vail. Davy, thar I stood an' thought 'twas
wicked I suppose
Bomegoto church to close thar eyes, an"
some to eye thar clo-e ;
I overheard ole Mi&susiwell to Missus Steb-
bins say,
My darter Becky's dress wan't done she
won't be here to-day."
I stood thar hesitatln' like what sort of more
to nuke ;
I felt that I should go inside for ray salva
tion's sake ;
I started meekly in the house. I knew It was
no harm,
With my old broad-brim hat in ban' an
jeans coat on ray arm.
I went along, 'bout half way up the velvet
carplt He,
The men and wlmmln shut thar gates, an'
tliy begin to smile :
I seed one open just a bit, went In and pull
ed it to.
When Brown, tho banker, rlz and said, "This
'tre's a rented pew."
I got oat ov this "rented pew"' an' sot down
near the door,
Expectin for some man ter say "This "ere a
rented floor."
A fine dressed vtranger he came In the mem
bers didn't wait.
Dot every feller jumped at him an' opened
wide his gate.
The parson rlz an' raised his nan's with cold
an' hautyair,
An'cvcrybody in tho house stood up and
heard his prayer.
I don't know how it was with them some
how I always feel
I'm do'.n' God Injustice when I get too proud
to kneel.
Then all sat down an stared about, then at
the pardon's face.
While he put on his specs an'sed, "Let's sing
A'n.izin Grace."
An oryin butted looo up-stalrs tho music
hit was gay.
Bit tickled thm as couldn't sing, an' them
wot had to pay.
The intnlek quit, the parson rlz they pass
ed the hats 'round next.
And when thcdeeklns sot them down the
parson took his tea.t.
Ue preached about two hours "bout the Faith
In God to keep
The wiinmiu folks were noddln' while thar
husbands were asleep.
One gal scd to another, "Ilev you seen my
bow to-day ?"
She'd ni l her hrd and then say back, "The
pirly it was uay."
.One whispered loud enough behind her fan
for me to hear.
"That bonnet Sofy Tag's got on Is one she
had last year."
The parson quit and then sot down tho or-
gin pliyM aj;in;
I thought if that was scrvin' God the tur.es
they pl-iyed was thin ;
I've ht'arn the b.uids at circusses Jest play
tho self-same nir.
Yhe parson, when the orgtn quit, dismissed
'em all with prayer.
Now, Davy, ef tho angels seed what I did, I
believe
Thar vc.irn't one, among 'era all, but what
Lined their sleeve
For G vi don't smile on Christians who Hir.
olefin's will abuse;
treliain't no use for orglns, and He don't
like rented pews.
He rln;;s no bells to toll 'cm that the Sab
bath's come once more ;
The angels had no carriages to drive up to
II k door.
Each Christians might as well look up to
Grtl. an' sweetly smile
An'g.iy -j send my soul, dear Lord; I'm
comin' after while.
Oar Master up In Heaven, Davy, sees hears
everything;
He Hkc3 to see Ms children kneel an' loves
to hear 'cm jlng;
For whar He live;, the angels slug an Chris-
tians get their dues
w niublc costs Hi mnothln', an be has no
rented pewa.
Thar ain't no uso o' foolln' long the road
down to the grave;
TQar i no way o' dodgin when you've got
yourboul to save.
f,ae churches, orglns, carriages, clothes,
rented pews, an' "pelf,"
bon'i
count that dayit lavs between sjcr JJd-
t-cr andyersclf.
The editor of a Missouri paper,
u relating what he knows about far-
m'", touches up the question iu this
style:
To make Berkshire pigs out of your
naz-l-p'uters. select a cool day, stand
"jwnon Uieir imins. tied to a ap
J)1,,J. and drive their noses back into
"r hhnulilew. leaviin; abiut an inch
PtrmJiinr. if yOU i(,k at the agri
P'Xmral papers, you will eo that all
J,0n,,- Iks are fixed that way. If
,,?u "ave anv who-e noses are longer
jnau the rest of the body, better sell
drill11 t,an arte"mn weI1 company for
Im-b'1-" -vou ca,'r"tdrivp thf nose
ack without tele.epiug the whore
ti,"i Vni?n you cut up hojis, leave
fn ''' Muare leaving some ii-ur.
: '"dt ovorir. -..;....!.. ,, i., ...m
J wnh several cents' less ner nound I
vlilTi um. a- . !- !
,an who -. i ..lj ...k.
fhitiaa can eat thorn.
ESTABLISHED 1856. i
Oldost Paper in the State.)
THE DEVIL-FISH.
Victor Hugo, in his 'Toilers of the
bea," gave an elaborate and painfully
intereBtiug description of a marine
mounter which he most appropriately
called The Devil-Fitm. This name is
applied to two varities of fish, one of
which is found upon the Atlantic
coast. An incident occurred in the
harbor of Charleston, S. C, some
years ago, which first brought this
hsh prominently before the American
publiu.
A negro, who bad anchored his
boat iu what he thought a favorable
place, and who was fishing quietly,
suddenly felt the bow of his boat pul
led down, and, instinctively rushing
to the atern to keep her balanced.
roared for help. The creature that
had hold of his anchor began to pull
him out to sea. He roared the loud
er, and tried to turn the boat, answer-
im tO - thcWMuntiroJl' inor-U !mr.w hrv
?l!wh!lii:wiwrWfoIdannof
VJbrtw'iiyfclfcVi W4:ZfinK.v V i Ji
ji SrerlrK?TipgHra"aA
uiuuguiuusr, u&upeu -uie usii to
turn, so that it'sooh-aii on "iHe sbal
lows. Those in the rescuing boats then at
tacked it with boat hooks, pitchforks,
and whatever other weapons came lo
hand, until dually it whs killed. It
proved to be h female specimen of the
Ccphaloptcra vampirus, or oeea n - v.. m -pire.
also failed the sea-devil. It
nearly covered the floor of the small
toum in whi. h it was exhibited, meas
uring nine feet across, and having the
form of a triangle, with one long
curved side. In the middle of this
long curve was the mouth, dud on
each side of the mouth an arm us long
as a man's hik! about four times at
'hick. These were evidently intend
ed to convey food to its mouth, and it
must have been with these that it
caught and held the negro's anchor.
Some years ago a "school" ot them
appeared off Cape May. The neigh
boring fishermen became quite exci
ted, and went after them in a schoon
er. They harpooned and captured
Home twenty of them. The largest
oue they caught which, however,
they declared was not the largest one
th3- r-aw measured fifteen feet in
width by twelve in length, and its
weight was two thousand and forty
four pounds when disembowled.
M-. T. R. Peale, of Philadelphia,
saw and bought this specimen for two
hundred dollars.
No door-way could be found large
enouuh to let it in except that of In
dependence Hall, and this huge offer
ing of American seas lay there in pat
riotic state, surrounded by wondering
groups.
Chemistry, however, soon began to
make its transformations patent to
surrounding hoses.
Mr. Peale, therefore, mude a care
ful drawing of the fish, and then a
frame rtsembling it as much as possi
ble, on which t0 5trelch the skin. Ft
took him all of one night to skin it.
and three carts were kept busy until
dawn in carry in ga way the fiVsh.
The devil-fish of Victor Hugo be
lougs to k different class. It is n Cep
halopoda, or head-footed, because th
feet, or ruther arms, spring directly
from the head.
Most of them have a horny beak
like that of a parrot, except that the
under part is longer instead of the up
per. Oue of these has been preserv
ed, which is four and a half inches In
length. Tho muscles in which the
jaws are emneuueu anu oy which
tjiey are worked, are extremely pow
erful. Mr Beale, an Englishman, who
had gone ashore on one of the Bonin
Islands to look forshells, noticed sud
denly nt his feet an extraordinary
looking animal crawling toward the
surf, which It had evidently only just
left. It was creeping on its eight les,
which, ifom their soft and flexible
nature, bent considerably under the
Weight of its body, so that it was lift
ed by its offortfl but little above the
rooks. Itanneared tbe much alarm-
'ed at seeing him. and made every ef
fort to escape. Mr. Beale endeavored
to stop it by pressing on one of its
legs with his font; but, although he
ii'-ed considerable force for that pur
p i-p, its strength was so great that it
several times liberated its limb in
spile of all the efforts heeould employ
on the wet and slippery rocks. He
then laid hold, with his hand, of one
of the tentacles in whirh his limbs
teiminated. and held it firmly, so that
it appeared as if the limb would be
torn n-sunder by the united efforts of
him-elfand the creature. He then
gave it a powerful jerk, wishing to
di-etiguge it from the rocks to which
it rltiog ao forribly by its murker
This effort it effectually resisted; but
tne moment after, the apparently en
raged animal lifted Us h ad. with its
large projecting eyes, and, loo-ening
its hold upon the. rock, suddenly
sprang. unou Mr. Beale's arm. and
clung to it, l3 means of its suckers,
with great power, endeavoring to get
its beak, which could now be seen be
tween the roots of it arms, in a posi
tion to bite. A sensation of horror
pervaded Mr. Beale' whole frame
when he found that tlii- hideous ani
mal had fixed itself so firmly on his
arm. lis cold, slimy grasp wa ex
tremely sickening; and he called
loudly to the captain, who wasat some
distance, to come and release him
from his disgusting assailant.
The captain quickly came, and. tak
ing him dowu to the boat, during
which time Mr. Beale wm employed
in keeping the beak of the octopus
awav from his hand, soon released
him" by destroying his tormentor with
lite boat-knife, which he accomplish
ed by cutting away portions at u time.
Let us now see how large these
formidable creatures sometimes grow
recent writer (October 25. 1873.)
says that the Italian fishermen of .San
Fram-icco. who frequent the Farall
otie Islands, and go down the eost.
not unfrequently take these devil-fl-h
from eight to ten feet across; mid.
somemonthsago.be saw one hang
ing at a door that measured at leat
nine feet from tip to tip of the tenta
cles. In 1855, Capt. Hyamm brodgbt
to Copenhagen, irom the Bahama Is
lands, one of these Hh eighteen feet
long. Plin3 speaks of one that infest
ed the const of Spain, devouring the
fi-rtrnri.l" destroying the fisheries It
weighed seven hundred pounds, and
its arms were more than thirty feet
long. Swedranfr reports that somfe
whalers took out of the mouth of a
whale pieces of a cuttle-fish that were
twenty-five feet long.
A mate of a whaling vessel sfates
that there were enormous squids in
the equatorial seas that furnish food to
the sp rm-whales, and that he harFon
one occasion spen an arm of one. thir
ty feet long, sticking in the mouth of
a
n-ntiio that sepmeu kick, ne smu
i. a imfi rfon sppn floating nieces of
their arms as thick through as a flour
i mt.r. l-.ltrt. nfnfa.nonf
narrei. i nis ihuci ni,ic...v...w
is cor
roborated by Mr, T. E. Poaie, Capt.
Francis Post, and Capt. E. E. Smith;
Another witness whose name is not
given, is quoted as havingseen a piece
forty feet Jong. The suckers on these
large arms are said, by two witnesses,
to be two feet across.
A large sperm-whale has an under
jaw some eighteeu feet long, thickly
set with strong teeth. He dives
down, it seems, and bites oh the arms
of these huge devil-fish, and devours
them. A writer in the Naturalist of
February, 1S73. says: "It is a preva
lent opinion among seamen that the
largest being that swims is a collassal
squid or cuttle-fish." So here we
come at last to that old. tough story
of Bishop Poutoppidan that haB long
been looked upon as the greatest "fish
story" extant, uneiiy given it is
this:
The Norwegian fishermen some
times find unexpected shallows when
-a short distance out.afcsea,nihedejith'
suddttnlyxdlrniBlsLjngTfrorH'one hun--
JheihffaHMltVtliailAjBkrakenas
"rifi1artheyimm'edi8tely 'retreat.1
His hackfirsLappears,. looking like a
nuinBelfrtniU-IshTndsrHis arms
rise above the surface like the masts
of a vessel, and are said to have pow
er to gra-p the largest man of-war
and pull it to the bottom. Pontoppi
dan's time wns from lfiHS to 1765. and
Norwegian njen-of-war, in those days,
were not as large as ours. If we 1
low the longest piece said to be bitten
off" by the sperm-whale (forty feet) to
be two-thirds of the arm. this would
give arms -ixty feet long; and sueh
arms, nn such a monster, might well
be formidable to a small vessel.
In a recent number of Nature (June
5, 1S73.) the following extract gives a
very curious proof of the possibility
of sueh an attack : "A recent copy of
Ike Japan Gazette states that a huge
ccphalopod is now shown in a house
near the temple at Asaka, Yeddo. It
seems that a limbing boat was spized
by its tentacles, while off the village
of Kononoto, and that the boatmen
killed the creature by repeated blows.
Its body was sixteen feet long."
Since the above Was written a curi
rius confirmation of these facts and
possibilities lias occurred quite near
tons in fact, almost upon our own
coast.
The Rev. Hnrvpy, of Newfound
land, in a recent communication,
says 1
"A few days ago (October 2G. 1873.)
two of our fishermen were out, in a
cmall boat, in Conception B-iy. near
Portugal Cove, when they saw a dark
shapeless mass floating upon the wa
ter. "On approaching the men conclud
ed it was a huge bale of goods per
haps part of the cargo of some wreck
ed vessel and that they had found a
valuable prize. One of them struck
the object with his boat hook, when
suddenly the dark heap became ani
mated, opened out like a huge um
brella without a handle, and the horror-stricken
fishermen beheld a pair
of green e3es, full of intelligence, but
also of ferocity, glaring at them, and
its huge, parrot-like beak open with
sav'Hge and malignant purpose. The
men were petrified with terror, and.
for a moment, so fascinated with the
horrible Bight that the were power
less. "The e3Tes of the monster were pe
culiarly large and prominent, bright,
and apparently gleaming with rage.
Before the fishermen could make any
attempt to escape, the creature, now
but a few feet from the bout, appear
ed to open out, and suddenly there
shot out from around its face several
long arms of corpse-like fleshiness.
Had these lithe, slimy arms, with
their death-like adhesive powers, once
fastened themselves on the boat or the
men. nothingcnuld have saved them
from destruction ; for, when the suck
ers with which they are furnished
have taken hold, nothing can tear
them awa3. The3' would have been
brought iu n moment, within reach of
the powerful beak which was ready
to dart upon them.
Onl' one of the longerarms reach
ed the boat, and, owing to its length,
went completely over and beyond it.
Quick as lightning, one of the men
seized a hatchet, and. at one blow,
severed the corpse-like arm which
was flung over the boat to drag it to
destruction.
"The green-e3'ed monster uttered
no cry of pain, but moved off; and
the fishermen who hud thus escaped
a horrible death, found themselves in
possession of the amputated arm,
which lias been forwarded from St.
John's I have just returned from a
careful examination ot it. It meas
ures nineteen feet iu length, and. as
the fishermen say the devil-fish must
have at least ten feet of this arm re
maining, the entire length must have
been some twenty-nine feet. It is
tough and fibrous, livid in color, and
pointed at the extremity, where it. is
covered with rows of suckers, which
are cartilaigeoous, horny, and about
the size of a quarter of a dollar. These
suckers act on the principle of a cup
ping glass. Each of them consists of
a firm, fleshy, cartilaginous ring,
across which a disk of muscular mem
brane is stretched, with a circular ap
erture in the center. A ooneshaped
mass of flesh fills this aperture, like a
piston, capable of being drawn back
ward. The niemhianous disk can al
so be drawn in. The moment one of
these disks touches the prey, the devil-fish
retracts the fleshy piston, which
creates a vacuum, and makes the edge
of the disk press against the surface,
so that it is impossible to tear them
away without destro3'ing the arm."
Mr. Alexander Murray, the geolo
gist of Newfoundland, in a letter to
Professor Jules Marcou. dated No
vember 10. 1S73, and read before the
Boston Socie y of Natural History.
November in, 1873. corroborates sub
stantially this uecniint. adding that
the name of the fisherman who cut
off the monster's arm wasTheophilus
Pieot. and that the ituimal was seen
off the eastern end of Great Belle Is
land, iu Conception Bay. He says :
"A part of this tentacle I have nw in
m.v pos-esimi. i Minersed iu spirits. I
seiid j'ou with this letter a couple of
ihoto"grapbs of the said tentacle, ami
a few of the small, denticulated suck-lug-cups.
Picotsays: "The body of
the animal was about -ixty feet long,
its general diameter not Ipss than five
feet, and the breadth of its tall at
Ipast ten feet." He stated that when
the creature found itself mutilated it
made off backward, or tail first, after
the manner of squids, darkening the
water over a large space with ink.v
emissions. The enormous proportions
proportions given above might appear
to be exaggerations were they not to
a great extent borne out by the frag
ment of the animal which was secur
ed, and of which the photograph will
give vnu n fair idea. The henk, or
bill. Picot says, wns about as large as
a six gallon Keg." Appmon's journ
al.
BROWNTILLE, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 26, 18T4.
OUR COMMON SCHOOLS.
From the proof sheets of the annu
al report of Hon. J. M. McKenzie,
Superintendent of Public Instruction,
now in press, we compile the folio w
ltig tabular statement of the amount
of money invested by the people of
the respective counties in school hous
es, school house sites, books and ap
paratus. It will be seen that atime of
the new counties of the weHt are get
ting ahead of the older and richer
populations of the river counties, in
public improvements as compared
with numbers and taxable wealth.
We change the alphabetical order for
the purpose of making comparisons
easier to our readers, and arrange the
counties according to total amounts,
discarding fractious of a dollar:
Douglas .$361,064
Lancaster .... 101,053
Nemaha C4,33ii
Otoe........... 61,170
Richardson-,;.. 53.371
Hall n,752
Dakota 11.716
Saline . 9,733
Boone ........;- 8,410
Flllmere .L"773.
HauiHton T" 7.473
Be ward ...... 8,Ug5
Getlar.,.-..-. 6,075
York... '.. 5.1 S3
Dixon .:.sw 5.177
Re, :..., 31.929
Gu&JZ.iJ- 34,S7?
Washington..-- au.v
Dodeo
30.469
Johnson...,
S irpy ....:...
Pawnee
Thayer
Cuming
Merrick ....
wlay ...
Adams......
Hurt
Jelfprson..,
IJuller
Colfax
28.410
DawsonStS.. 4.445 j
24,017 ' Madison..".:
3.874
aj.usj Wayne
1(J,647 Stanton ......
18.189 . Webster
17,370 Pierce
17,07S Knox
15,827 Cheyenne
15tfH Kearney ....
15.31C Nm-kolls
15,07 Harlan
14.29a Franklin
I4.2i3 Antelope .
3.250
2.4U4
2.3 IS
1.792
1.740
1.700
454
272
213
140
25
Plane.
Polk...
12.753
The total amount invested in the
State in thee permanent educational
improvements figures up to oue mil
lion, one hundred and sixt3-Beven
thousand and thirteen dollars, .and
eighty-seven cents. State Journal.
AN INTER-
PLANETARY
TELE-
In this venturesome age, when Sci
ence, emboldened b3" success, seems
to have laid claim to omnipotence, we
may not be surprised to learn that
there is yet hope that the inhabitants
of this earth may become personally
acquainted with the denizens of other
spbeies. Iu a recent communication
to the French Academy of Science,
Mr. Charles Cross ventures the opin
,on that the approaching transit of
Venus might be mude of service iu
enabling us lo hold communication
with the dwellers in that planet or,
as he expresses it: "It is possible that,
among the dwellers on the surface of
Venus, there may be some who are
astro'nomers. to whom it may occur
that the passage of their world across
the sun's disk will attract our curios
ity . Hence it is reasonable to suppose
that theee mvchita will perfect means
to transmit signals to us precisely at
the instant when they determine that
multitudes of e.irthly telescopes are
turned in theird.lrection." As to just
how these signals afe fn be made, or
what is to be the basis of the inier
plauetary alphabet l.v which the sig
nals are to be transmitted, still re
mains to be suggested "We have
heard," sa3's a recent critic of Mr.
Cros, "of a scheme of sigmdingtn the
moon l means of long, black plat
forms arranged on wheels and placed
on the extended snow-fields of Sibe
ria." Ho it appears that we of the
earth are read'. Soon, thanks to tho
liberality of Mr. Lick, We shall have
a telescope that will bring the moon
within eight miles of us ; and it may
be that a slight enlargement of this
scheme might enable us to transfer to
that body and it inhabitants, a full.y
equipped fifty-inch telescope, that
with it and the accompanying signal
book all could he satisfactorily arrang
ed. Or, what seems wiser still,
might it not be well to pack a thousand-inch
bombshell with school-masters,
and project them across the "va
cant space bj the aid of a million-ton
gun and a chargeof nitro-glycerine?"
Appleton's Journal.
urn i i.'w -
tfUE BIRDS.
We are glad to see that a move is
being made in Kansas to introduce
the English sparrow into that Slate.
Of all birds the sparrow is the most
destructive to insects and the most
prolific. The barbarous habit of
Americans in lulling insect-eating
birds bus been as destructive to the
interest of the farmer ami fruit-grower,
as these ornaments to the groves
and gardens themselves. The pre
tense that they desimj' fruit when
ripe is the veriest sham, for a flock of
birds will protect more fruit ami grain
in a season than a thousand times
their number can destri3 while a
little care for a few days ohviatesevpu
that inconvenience. The trees in the
New York parks were for 3'ears de
nuded of their foliage by insects, and
it became at Just a necessity to devi-e
some ilteitiis o'f protection or submit
jo their destruction entirety. Some
body suggested the sparrow, and
some other body bad sense enough to
adopt the suggestion. The result is
t bat I he insects are gone, and the New
Yorker now enjoj-s the luxuriant
shade of the parks in the hot weath
er, at the ame time watching the ec
centricities and habits of the sober
colored birds, which nvike the trees
wnd grass plats cheerful with the most
attractive form of animal life. We
want sparrows in Kansas and in Kan
sas Ci'3 nlo. JTannas City Journal
of Commerce.
AN ANT BATTLE.
The Waneaborough (Term.) Banner
saj-s: William Norman, a citizen of
this place, while on a visit to Law
renceburg, last summer, was witness
to a fight between two colonies of
ants, one the small red ant, an eighth
of an inch long; the other a brown
ant. about one-fourth of an inch long.
It seems.that the brown ants had at
tacked the red ants in their holes,
driving and whipping them out. Af
ter the red ants hail been driven out
to the numher of several millions, ap
parent l.v, they would take refuge un
der ever3T leaf and chip that could be
found in the space of three yards
-quare. which was the size of the bat
tle ground. The brown nuts would
throw out skirmishers, which would
advance near to the red ants and
were immediately attacked by the
reds, and nearly annihilated, the sur
vivors returning to the mini body.
The main body would advance upon
the red army, which would break
ranks and scatter in all directions, the
brown ants pursuing and killing all
they could catch. The little insects
displa3ed a much bravery and evinc
ed as much judgment as intelligent
human beings. The red ants would
not risk an open engagement, but
would instantly surround nny strag
gling party and kill them though
they trfernselv'p.s were afterwards ex
terminated. The brown ants, on re
ceiving information from their scouts
of their whereabouts, would swarm
out of their haunts h.y myriads, thpir
motions expressing the greatpst fury,
as they tumbled over one another in
their eagerness to fight.
Vritten for-llie'Atlvertlser.
SUCCESS in life:
BY XILP.
If a man would be successful.
And make his life replete
With joys, and short horn cattle,
And have Berkslilres' at his feet.
He must learn to be a farmer;
A Granger thed as well.
Have never ending pleasure,
And Berkshire pigs to sell.
And If he'd be a Granger,
He must learn with perfect ease
To stand upon his head
With his chin upon his knees,
To wait before the Master
With patient manly grafe,
And then be led 10 Ceres
With a smile upon his face,
s-Henuistildetho "GrangojrsgoaV'j 3
:Wh BlaluMI 1ml a orl pf?uas T '
hJUJffiriiFRndklaaldnort , .
ISB-hiakeatetrlJtefilw:-NE- . .
Tifenat each Harvest-feast, "J
it7feds WmT
J&$g&tMl ?Sf - . 5
iuusi ue iaiu upon uie aiior,
Tho' it be of "blooded stock."
To be a farmer and a Granger,
Should be man's aim In life,
Have a herd or Texas cattle,
And a gentle loving WiTe,
Have his ship of joy and comfort,
On life's tempestuous seas.
Well fiil'd with pork and harmony,
And live quite at ids ease.
OUR NEW YOKE LETTER.
Bulls, Bears, Finance Soclety,PolltU
cistiit. -Bulls- Immigration.. TJiePoor
The Grain Trade.
Correspondence UebiaSka Advertiser.
New Yokk, Feb. 23, 1871.
WALL STItEET BOLLS AND BEARS.
I spent a dt3 or two in Wall street
this week, and learned something.
The man who learns an3'thing ought
to lose no time before he communi
cates it to his fellows, hence I shall
give what I learned to 3'our readers at
once.
Do 3'ou know what a "bull" is, or a
"bear," iu Wall street? I spent two
days learning.
Iu Wall street a "bull" is an oper
ator who believes he can push the
price of any particular stock to a high
er point: Take Toledo nud Wabash,
for instance. Suppose it is selling at
48. The bull from certain indications
believes it will go up to 50. or higher.
He bu3-s it 4S; and deliberately goes
to work to put it up. He will lie like
a like a politician he will invent
bogus dispatches he will spread re
ports of the death of Presidents of
railroads publish bogus reports of
the business done in short, there is
no vilSnifiy in the range of lyiug, per
jury and fraud that he will not com
mit to make that slock go up to a
figure above 48.
The bear is the man who sold the
stock, I forgot to sa3 that the bull
bti3's the slock to be delivered at a
certain date 903 tiiirty da3s. Now, if
on that date Toledo and Wabash is
worth 50, the bear simplT pa3s the
bull the odd two if, on the other
hand it goes down to 46, the bull pa3s
the bear the odd two. It tJus be
coms a struggle between them the
bull to toss it up, the bear to pull it
down.
The tight is deadly. The bear will
get into the newspapers all sorts of
stories concerning the road. He will
have Crov. Cox, the President, dead
or stricken with paralysis, he will in
vent horrible accidents, and spread re
ports of defalcations and gross mis
management. The bull practices tac
tics precisely the reverse.
The settlement is made' on the basis
of the selling price of the stock on the
day named.
Ver.y frequently bears turn bulls.
If a bear sees that it is impossible to
pull down a stock, he frequently buys
and becoms a bull to cover. This he
can do. if he can buy more of the
stock than he has sold.
T"l!ese transactions ver- frequentty
involve millions, and lhe3 embrace
everything under Heaven, Gold Rail
road, and other stocks, grain, lumbei ;
everything in fact that is made the
subject of their struggles.
A "corner'' is the bti3ing of the en
tire stock of a corporation, or at least
more than can be delivered. Thus
we will assume that there are 50,000
shares of the Toledo & Wabash iu all,
the bears ignorant that a corner has
been made iu Wabash, si-11 the stock
to be delivered in, sa3 thirty da3s,
supposing that there is enough of it
iu tho market to be had to make the
deliver at a profit possible. The time
approaches and the3 begin to look
about tdget the stock. They find to
their dismay that there is not a
share to be had ; for the very good
reason that the bulls have tall. Thu3
become frantic, but to no purpose.
The bulls litdd, and run the price up
td aii3 figure the3 choose, to which
the poor nears are compelled to sub
mit. But don't suppose it 4s all plain
sailing with the bulls! If the bear-
are strong enough they buy tip one of
the bulls, which makes a break, and
if they get a break made. Heaven
help the bulls. It is war to the knife
and no mercy shown or expected.
Watering stock is where a corpora
tion becomes exceedinglj profitable
too profitable in fact, for th'cf public to
endure quietl3. Suppose a railroad
having a monopol3 makes mone3'
eTfnugh to declare dividends of 20 per
cent. The public would clamor for a
reduction of fa'res', so the directors
double the number of shares water
ing the'capital. There is no more
capital than before, but they call it
more. If the3 double it they declare
10 per cent, dividends on $2,000,000,
instead of 20 percent, on $1,000,000.
It i3 all gambling oF tho most de
plorablo kind,
There are legitimate j
stock brokers but llieruiS is gambl
ing;. SOCIETY
Is fermenting in this city just now.
Balls, parties, theatres, operas and en
tertainments, of all kinds ate in full
blast, and the fashionable people are
worked terribly. B3 the way the
New York belle is a hard worker
during the season. She rises at noon
because she was out late the night
before. She breakfasts in her room
and dresses herself for the afternoon
round. She enters her carriage and
drives to reception after reception, un
til night has come, wheu she goes
dresses herself in evening toilet, and
again enters her carriage to make a
irOUnai-Br3qrM"i iiuu venna.n.
"rW . .- . ..1Lr'7ir I - t. .
7-p
-. -. -J-Jkr . , , .
"-lirofTr -1 "5" " "co l" ,C,J'
sleepeltlll Hoh.ana is up aild ftt it
agalnAndtliis is pleasure! Were
the3 compelled to do this for a living
there wnuld be more strikes among
them than among the laborers. But
they do it
POLiTICIANS
A reputation in New York is a sin
gular thing. Brennan, the SherlfFin-
dictcd for the escape of Genet, and in
therefor, has more friends among the
controlling element than ever. The
short haired look upon Brenan as a
martyr. The other night a ball was
given in his honor, which was run by
the most desperate villians in the
city. But mark vou, the leading re-
epectable Democrats of the city were
there, for tho3 dare not stay away
Mr. Brennan's broken-nosed adher
ents run thecaucusses, and not one of
these broad-cloth gentrj could get a
nomination if the oppose him. There
fore all these men attend the balls df
the Brennan kind, and shake hands
with them, and smile and fawn on
the doubtful women the3 bring there.
New York is under the control of
the ruffians, and the Democracy rec
ognize the fact, and acknowledge
their rule. There is ho hope of an3
thing good from this Nazareth. The
country is the 011I3 salvation
IMMIGRATION".
The decline in irairiigra"tio'n is now
very marked. During tile past week
the total number of immigrants laud
ed at Castle Garden was 011I3' 456,
which is the smallest number receiv
ed iu a single week for several years
But the3 nre of a good class. Ger
many is largel3' represented. Sweden
Norway aud Denmark, contribute
(heir quota. The Scandinavians most
I3' go to the Northwest, the Germans
fo the Western Middle States while
the Iri3h, as mai3' a3 possible, sta3
in the large cities, where they can
run grog-mills, and finally become
Aldermen, aud run things generally
THE POOR
Are'sufTering this winter. There is
work enough in New York for 80 per
cent, of the working men, so there is
no occasion for much distress among
those who have health and strength
But the sick and the weak are iu a
pitaible condition. Every day sick
men aud women are found in the gar
rets of the over-crowded tenements,
and in the cellers as well, d3ing from
hunger and cold. The soup-houses
hre doing a very great and" good
work in feeding the poor, but
what good is a soup-hollse to a wo
man who cannot get to it? It is es
timated that 400 men ami women per
ished from cold and hunger last week
Why any human being comes to or
s'a3s in a great city, is be,ond
ray comprehension. I don't know
wli3 I am here. Where one succeeds
a thousand fails, and success here does
not mean as much as it does any
where elae
THE GKAIX TRADE
Continues to excite especial attention.
The fact is that rew lork ought to
lose it lor sue lias never done any
thing to foster it. All the grain that
comes to this city is handled h.y hand
it has to be carted from the depot to
the vessels ami the cost of transfer al
most eats it up. A movement is on
foot to build tracks b3 the water-side
'o erect elevators as in the Lake
Cities, so that the grain can be taken
out ot the cars and loaded into ves
sels at slight cost. This is all that
can posibh save the trade, and this
will tint do it unless the Erie Canal is
enlarged and the exhorbitaut tolls
lessened. Moutreui, Boston, Phila
delphia and Baltimore all have super
ior facilities and they are taking the
trade. Wh3 don't the farmer's or
gauizations take some action iu the
matter of the canals? There is little
use in looking to" New York for relief.
PlETKO.
Safety in the Use of Kerosene
The following hint, given by a ttir
respondent of the Tribune, relates an
exceedingly simple method of precau
tiou iu the use of kerosene aud other
cheap oils, and may be wort 113 of at
tention. His plan is to fill the lamp
Iightl3 with jewelers' cotton before
pouring in the oil. The cotton ab
sorbs a great deal of the oil, and. iu
case of accident, the latter dtfes not
flow about, and can thus be easliy ex
tinguished. On one occasion his ker
osene lamp burst, and a mass of flame
jumped out, but being in a compact
bodi he covered it instantly with a
bucket, and with the help of the wa
ter pitcher and a few wet towel3. ex
tinguished it before the slightest dam
age was done. Had it not been for
the cotton, the flaming oil would have
flown in all directions
A man who told his Wife that he
must retrench -cut down famiPy ex
penses on account of hard times, has
just sold his dog for twenty-five dol
lars, and taken two shares in a lotteri.
He will try. hesa3s, to get along with
out a dog this Winter, and will buy a
couple of pups nost spring.
VOL. 18.-1ST0. 35
GRANGE SECRETS REVEALED.
How Initiation are Condncted.
From the Randolph Enterprise.
On being brought iuto the ante
rotim of the lodge (Greengrocer Tem
ple, No. 101.) I was told I hail been
balloted for and accepted. M3 inform
ant, who was securely masked l3
what I afterward learned was a large
burdock leaf, uerforated with holes
for the eyes, told me that if I valued
n3' life it would be necessari' for me
to strip. As I did consider that con
siderable worth to rne, and as he Ital
eized his wishes b3 careless pla3
ing with a saven shooter, I withdrew
from m3 garments with eagerness.
M3' masked friend then furnis'Ilpd me
with the regalia of first degree called
"The Festive Ploughbo3" which
consisted merely of one large cabbage
rge catii.age
nil nf potut" -
tumb I was
leaf attached to aWaist-bi
vlne3. In this air3 costu
conducted to the door, where 1113 com
pauion gave three distinct raps (I
was secure blindfolded by binding a
slice of rutabaga over each e3e.) A
sepulchral voice from within asked :
"Who comes?"
M3 guide answered i "A jMUthful
agriculturist who desires to become a
granger."
Sepulchral Voice Have 3011 looked
him carefull v over?"
Guide I have noble gate-keeper.
S V. Do 3011 find any agricultural
marks about his parson ?
Guide I do.
S. V. What are they?
Guide The candidate has earrot3
hair, reddish whiskers, and a tUrnup
UO-.C.
Si V. 'TIs well. Win do you de
sire to become ti granger?
Guide (answering ftirfcandidate)
Ti.at I may be thereb.v the better en
abled to harrow up the feelings of the
rasially politicians.
S. V. You will bring in the candi
date. M3 wortti3 strippllng, as 'ou
canuttsoe. I will cause 3011 to feel
that you nre received at the door on
the three points nf a pitchfork, pierc
ing the regions of the stomach, which
to teach 3ou the three great virtues
faith, hope and charit3. Faith in
yourself, hope for cheaper farm ma
chinery, and charity for the lightning-rod
pedler. You will now be
harnessed, and in representation of
the horse. Pegasus, will be tested as
to endurance and wind.
The candidate is here attached to a
small imitatln'u plow, by tiieilns o'f a
hempen harne-s. A dried pumpkin
vine is put in his mouth for a bit anil
bridle he is made to get down upon
all fours, t lie guide seizes the bridle,
and urged on by a granger armed
with a Camilla thistle, which he vig
orously applies at th terminus nfthe
spine, the candidate is galloped three
times around the room. Whilp mak
ing the circuit the members arise anil
sing :
Get up and dust you bully boy
Who wouldn't be auranyer?
If the thistle' prick don't cause you Joy,
To feeling you must be estranged, ah !
After this violent exercise he is
rubbed dry with corn-cobs beeswax
ed where thistled. aud brought stand
ing up before the great chief the
most worshipful pumpkin head.
M. W. P. H. Why do you wisli to
be a granger ?
Candidate (answering for himself)
That I may learn to extinguish
sewing machine agents.
M W. P. II. Have 3011 r hands
been hardened with toil?
Candidate Not extensively, but
then I am not running for oflice.
M. W. P. H. 'Tis well, for our
lodges contain several who are sup
posed to be read3 to sacrifice theni
selves for the good of their constitu
teuts. Do 3ou feel pretty smart tiiis
evening
Candidate Yes,
where tho bustle
goes on.
M. W. P. H. (savagely)
-Give me
a chaw of tobacker!
Candidate searching himself thor
oughly, but as there is no place nbout
him to stick a pocket, tries to explain
but the most worshipful pUmpkin
head interrupts him with :
"Never mind, my dearj'nung fiiend
I am well aware that in 3'our present
condition 3011 can no more furnish
3nur friends with Ihe weed than Ad
am could be comfortable in a plug hat
and tight bodts. It is merel3 th teach
3'du the great lesson of economy do
ing to others a 3'ou'd like to have
them do to 3ou You wiil now be
conducted to the most eminentsquash
producer." who will teach 3011 the
grand hailing sign of distress. The
sign, m.v wortI3' brother, will insure
3011 against man of the ills of the
agrlculturi-t among other-. ngnint
drouths and being bit by the ferocious
grasshopper."
The candidate is now conducted to
the most eminent squash producer
who thus says : "M3 most wort 113
brother. I will now invest you with
the order of the festive PIoughbo3.
which yon have well won ly our
heoric achievement while liarne-ed
may" .you ever wear it with pleasure
ta 3oiirself. and may it be a means of
terror to your enemies."
(The M" E S P. then proceeds to
invest the candidate with the regalia
of the festive Ploughboy. which con
sists of a long tomato necklace ) "The
grand hailing sign of distress is made
b gently closing the left e.ve. In3ing
the right forefinger alonguide of the
nose, and violently wagging the pars.
It requires practice, hut the advan
tage are intensp. It al-o has an im
portant signification, which 3011 will
do well to heed. The closing of the
eye signifies that in all 3our dealings
with mankind 3011 are bound to have
an eyefn business. Laving the finger
alongside the nn?e is emblematical of
wisdom, and places 3011 nt once
among the 'knowing ot.es.' This is
extremely handy in prognosticating
flew weather, and eaves the wear and
tear of almanacs. Wagging the Cars
signifies sublimity of purpose, and Is
thought to be emblematical of child
hood.s happy hours.'.' It l supposed
bv some profound scholars to have a
distinct referance to apple dumplings
but this fact is somewhat obscure b.y
the dust of ages. In token that 3011
are one of us. 3011 will now be brand
ed. This ceremoti3 i-j very impres
sive, and consists of two brands.
The3 are both applied "while the
Iron is hot," and consists of one fetter
of the alphabet each. The first is a
large letter S. n which 3011 will
please sit while the other letter is ap
plied to the stomach- The letter S
1133 wnrthj chicken, signifies scooped
and refers to railroad monopolies. It
is also supposed to indicate the seat of
learning the spot where the old-time
teacher hunted for brains with a fer
ule. The second letter is C. and is
applied, as t said before, to the stom
ach. It has a double meaning. First
the application is an agricultural one,
"corn crfh," and has reference to the
stomach as being the !reat receptacle
for Burbon whisky. But, brother dot
One Inch
Throe Inches.
Six Inobes
Twelve Inches
One Column-
ffl CO $200 fACO C0
3 on 4 co io eo
5 00 600 10 Wl COCO
Sin io en aiflo kco
15 00 20 00 S5C0 COCO
?10 00
mco
33 no
KKfiO
ICO 00
Lcgaladvertlsements at legal rates: Onesqnaro
(10llneofNoniareJlsiace.or less.) first insertion
1,00; eachscbtequcntlnscrtlon, 3Cc.
jCirAIltraaacltat advertisements must be paid
for' n advance.
OFFICIAL PAPER OF THE COUXTT.
not be diligent iu finding a home
market for 3our corn. The second
application oT the, letter C. m.v dis
tracted infant, is got hold a3 follows:
When one granger desires to ascertain
'for sure" if there is another of the
order in the room, he raises himself
gently 1 13 the slack of his of his mi
meutionables scratches his off thigh
with his near hoof, and remarks in a'
voice of thunder: "Are there any
grangers nbout? The answer is "Jeea
wax." The inquirer then says,, "let
us see (letter C ). and the other party
must immeditely pull out his stomach
and disclose the brand.-
These brands are applied In such a
manner that I am enabled to assure
you that they will wash.
I was here Interrupted Mr. Editor,
I13' a volley fired Into the open win
dow, evidently intended for me. For-
tunntely I escaped without a scratch,
- a,)( whirh is of -more -.criiijeque.nye, . " v
succeeded in fetcliing off m.v precious"
manuscript. This is about all there
i in the ceremnnj of an importance
I must leave the country at once
armed men are at ni3' heels they
know that T nm writing to expose
them Ynu may bear from me again
bv mail, if I should deem it best to'
expn-e the other degrees until theif
adieu. From 3otir sacred rrieml,
B Pole.
Notice This cpremony of initiation
is used during the absence of the lndy
mem'hprs T)iplr initiatory ceremon
ies afp entirely different, being much"
simplified, as they should be.
DEVOlS CAT-FISH."
The following story is told with
great gusto by George Devol. a well
known sporting man J
I tell ou what it is. hoys. It's tho
best stoiy 3-011 ever beard. You see,
it was in New Orleans, before the
war. M3 partner was Char!e3 Bn-h,
a ver3 much of a gentleman, and widl
known there. He was worth as much
more than Mik. . We both lived to
gether, and one night we staid up till
moruin' buckin' ihe tiger. When wo
started home, we coneltuled to go by
the market and get our marketin' on
the way. Well, we got everything
for the 1I113 ordered aud were passing
the fish market, when I called Bush
to look at it cat-fish that the market
man saiil weighed 140 pounds. Just
then, a man who Isoked like a stran
ger, ami who afterward s.iid that he
came from Alabama, approached and
stopped when he saw the fish. Said,
"I've often heard of the big cat fish,
in the South, but that is a whopper.""
"I guess 3ou are mistaken," says I,
"taat is a pike "
"Pike, h 1 !" says the Alabama?
man ; "that is a cat-fish."
Says I, "I II bet fifty it's a pike.andr
leave it to aii3 man 3ou maj pick."
Bush overheard the bet, and snatch-'
ing a little book from his pocket, and
pulling a pencil let on to be collecting
the rents.ns 11113 other market master.
So I said to the stranger, "There is
the market-master, what do 3ou say
to hi in?"
"Agreed," sa3s Alabama, and thof
hundred was put up.
Then says I to Bush. "Look here,
sti anger, we have made a little bet
for the drinks, and want 3011 to de
cide it." Then I told him what the
bet was oil.
Says Bush, "I have been market-;
master hero for ten years, anu in that'
time I have never seen as large a
pike "
Well, Alabama drawed himself up
to his six foot two, and said :. "Gen
tlemen, you have won the money,
but two bigger fools t never saw ;"
the codling aioTii.
At the late meeting of Illinois Hor
iicultural Society, Dr. C. V. Rirly,
State Entomologist of Missouri, thus
treated of this important pest of the
orchard:
The moth is not a native but is an im
portation from tlieorohards of Europe.
It has now spread over the whole
country from Maine to west of thtf
Rocky" Mountains It has proved to.
be one of the most damaging of nlfr
the insects that infest the apple-orchard;
while the pear and other ca
h'xed fruits al-o suffer from it, as the
eggs are only laid in the blossom-end
of the fruit. "or the cal.vx. The moth
is seldom seen In the da3-time being
nocturnal in its habits. After batch
ing which most I occursat night. It
lets Itelf down bv a thread, or crawls
down the trunk of the tree and chang
es to a pupa inclosed in a "-iiketi cover
ing These pupa we find under tho
loosp Imrk of the apple.
This insect is double-brooded the
first having been deposited in tliera-
Ivx of the fruit. onti after the fmir is
set; and about six weeks after th rail
ing of the blosoms, this first brood
werms lnve the fruit as stated above.
The second brood follow this, and aro
found in the late-ripening fruit and
do not leave the apple until tuy ai"6
put lute barrels. Bmulfges, shin
g'es an I nh-r binds; are put on
1 be tre1". Cndpr thee the Insects
make their changes fn the pupa state
and are tbu de-to3pd. nper makes
the ehe.nnest bandage of all and eMs
butair'fie The use of viols of liq
uid and of light to de troj theiusects,.
appears to be of no value.
W
MAKING AGniCULTCUAL FRESX-
DENTS.
How such paragraphs as the follow
ing' would have been laughed at a few
years ago! Now, politicians look w ithr
a certain wholesome apprehension up
on stich talk, however it may have
originated. This is fduud-in a Wash
ton telegram :
It is rumored thnt Col. Robert W.
Furnas, the present Govonor of Neb
raska a man of great wealth and a man
who has done and is doing much for
the Agricultural interests of the West,
will be the Farmers' candidate f-r
President of the United Stttes in 1S7'j
Judge Win Schley of Georgia, is?
named for Vicp-President. Gov Fur-,
nas is an euthu-iastic Agriculturist J
and devoted to farmers' interests.
Concerning Gov. Furnas, we know
I little, except that he is an enthu-j
slastic horticulturist and has doner!
much within the past few wars tori
bring his State to the notice of Indus J
trial men by un exhibition of her pro
ducts. Rural New-1 other. f
We believe we were right when we
opposed the rpconstuctiou measures;
applied to certain states of the union;
the reason v? hereof be Jog. timzt wi
were sincere in our opposition to all
these measures. Platihlmrg Lever.
The Gad's Hill robbers were alsi
sincere, therefore the were righl
This, at least, is where the Lever's
logic would lead, by a " mental j-roJ
cess," of. Joe uazetic.
A salt mine has been discovered ir
Muscatine, Iowa. It was In a roll 1
butter and weighed about four pounds
V
i!
4
4'
r.i