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About Nebraska advertiser. (Brownville, Nemaha County, N.T. [Neb.]) 1856-1882 | View Entire Issue (March 16, 1865)
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LIBERTY AND UNION, ONE VXD INSEPARABLE NOW AND FOREVER,"
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BROWNVILLE, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, MARCH 16, 1865.
Wfiv ' f - If, -I s
yy y Ay Ay. Ay
i:. i O O A Lt' xJ ii
Curcer 2nd and Maia Streets,
BUOWNVIIjIiE, N- T.
; f-rtrtred to doall kinds of work In Via Una on
i BY FRED. AUGUST,
laCAXV, BET- FIKST AND SECOND STS.
1 outers, Cte, PiM, Cookie". Ginger Bread, etc.
' i ,rf .' dewrlptionti constantly on hand.
good MKALS serred in the bt style "onshort
aim iare assortment ot
I Tobacco, Cigars, Xvtts. ; (Wie.
Canned Fruit. Oysters, Sovp,
1 Crackers, Raisens, Cur-
! rants, and a supply of
II. C. THURMAN,
iOABINET-M AK.E R
i . CARPENTER.
Having opened up permanent on
S- Oneauorabove the Baltimore, CloSung Store, is
spared to doall kinds of work m Mg line -in the
! rv beFt and style, particular attenUne given to
iCoSract Tfl-nU eo.p'd
idfiress Brounvllle or Peru, Neb.
I i sinqH m time saves unm:'
U tt bis pt yt, ready to perform all work.ir
ialninB to Llibu8iness. ... TBpli.nir.
Hon. and iSS;; ffi' "approved
iDf' etc;iS. Give him a call.
"opun Maia Street, eat of Atkmson s id
BrowcriUe, April 7. ly .
B. 0. HARE'S
SKY LIGHT GALLERY
n "f getting work done elsewhere.
Paruc"'.-'pain taken with cbiWrun, .ieo in copying
WPk "- nark-red, black, green, or plaids are
j-olora for cbildreu's dreea.
CHAS. G. DORSEY.
ATTORNEY AT LAW
April 14th. 1861.' ' tSJvSyly
C. F. STEWART, M. D.,
PHYSICIAtl AND SURGEON.
Bos East corner of Main and First Streets
OrrKi to 9 a. m. and 1 to 2 and 6 to
Biwpville, Nebraska, May gth, 1864 So 85, ly.
E. a BURNS, M. D
j PHYSICIAN & SURGEON !
I ZoxxxaIix,, City, KJ I1-
j OFFICE AT HIS RESIDENCE.
f ialy28tk,lS84. P47-T8-pdly
j WaUer WpaP all Paper J!
Constantly on hand at Marohn's Tailor Shop, by
j LOUIS TYIXUTXR
! Pa er-haneing done la tbe moat approyed style, and
; SaivM able cash tcrma.
rowuviiia. b. Janet 1861, 6w
j ATTORNEY AT LAW,
! FALLS CITY, NEBRASKA.
j ff Win pracUce in all Ike Courta yf nab.
j EDWARD W. THOMAS,
K ATTORNEY AT LAW,
SOLICITOR IN CHANCERY,
Office corner of Main and First Streets.
Y. M. C. PERKINS,
Great Western Pbotograpb
First door "West of Brownville House,
liUOWNVILLE. N. T.
kan V K u unnoonca 9 xne pnouc mai ne
touv p kT-L-lBbt Gallery, and ia now prepared
iba.rf T"7 ki,l(1' el,e na W 01 Pictures known to
ana it I latest and moat approved style.
. IOWr pricM than tDT tthr artist my.t of Rt,
ilir i, Those wishing picturea will Jlnd it (creatly t
oriel iltr"1 10 cu na examine his spelm,ens and
- -.vi, 8oing eisewnere.
All kinds of Pictures copied into Photo,
&ICL.V;GFUN" SWAK are oooetantly receiving
an.Vhi. eir ,wU n Prices will suit erers body "o
A EDlirfi4 .
W -ZJZ n ment of Coniectionary Including
At Motyitjglilia vrtxt
LET IT PASS.
"Let former grudges pass." Shiiibpherk.
Be not 'swift to take offense ;
Let it pass !
Let it passl
.Auger is fee te sense;
Brood not darkly o'er a wrong"
Which will disappear ere long!
Rather sing tkis cheery song
Let it pas!
Let it pass I
Strife oorrodss the purest mind ;
Let it pass!
Let it pass !
As the unregarded wind,
Any rulgar souls that lire
May Cono'emn without reprieve;
lis the noble who fergire.
Let it pass !
Let it pass I
Echo not an angry word ;
Let it pass I
Think how often you hare erred ;
Let it pass !
Since our joys must pass away,
Like the dew drops on the spray,
Wherefore should our sorrows stay T
Let them pass !
Let them pass !
If for good you're taken ill,
Let it pass I
Oh, be kind and gentle still ;
Let it pass !
Time at last makes all things straight ;
Let us not resent, but wait,
And our triumph shall be great ;
Let it pass I
Let it pass!
Bid your anger to depart ;
Let it pass!
Lay these homely words to heart ;
"Let it pass!"
Follow not the giddy throng ;
Better to be wronged than wrong ;
Therefore sing this cheery song
Let it pass!
Let it pass !
lite D05 and ibe Copperhead,
BT DAVID BiRKEB.
One day last weefc, asth railroad train
Juit east of the Etni.bog,
Wm thundering along through the State of Maine
It came to a yelping dog.
And I sw that the dog looked poor and mean,
As he stood on his hinder part,
And yelped like sin as he sat between
A sled and a broken cart.
But the train passed on through the Etnabog
Passed on fromthe sled and cart
Passed on from the loury, yelping deg,
Still left on his hinder part.
One day this week, as Freedom's train
On its holy mission sped,
And thundered along through the State of Main
It came to a Copperhead.
And it made ma think of the railroad train
That dashed through the Etnabog,
And thundered along through the State of Maine,
In tpite of the yelping dog.
For the train on its holy mission sped,
And gladdened each loyal heart,
But it left the grambling Copperhead
Still flat on his hinder part.
The Ambllleus Brigand.
A 8torr of Naplet..
One day(what matter about the year?)
a plainly. dressed man, apparently a for
eigner, entered the city of Naples on
foot. He proceeded to the poor quarter
of the town, where he hired ap jold un
tenanted house, that all the people
around believed to be haunted. He paid
half a year's rent in advance, took pos
session, bought a few necessary articles
of furniture, laid in a heavy stock of pro
visions, and shut himself up in complete
seclusion. All the cossins, of course,
wondered who he was, where - he came!
from, what he intended to do, and so on;
but as they did not like to venture an in
quiry of the enly person who could give
lhem the desired information, they had
nothing left for it but random guesses
and mysterious speculations.
Days and weeks passed, and nothing
was seen of the strange tenant neither
coming oujt or going in, nor yet at any
of the windows, all of which remtined
closed, save an upper cne that, from its
situation, nobody could see jnto. Then
some of the neighbors said the man was
no man, but a mere apparition ; others,
that lie had gone in as flesh and blood,
but had since been spirited away by the
demons of the place-
At last the police went to investigate
the mystery. Their demand for adroit
ance was answered by the man himself
a tall, dark personage, with deep blue
eyes and penetrating look, who, in the
most polite manner, invited them iu.
showed them all. over his poorly-fur
nished house, and treated them to the
best he had. He told them he was
SpaniarcLby birth, a student from choice,
a recluse from whim, and a soothsayer
by nature. They Lade him predict his
own fate, and then arrested and i teokj
him before a magistrate. As the latter
could find nothing against him he let him
off with.a fine and a few days' imprisosv
cried out, in the hearing of many, "Let
him who has condemned me without
cause beware of the judgement that will
soon be cassed upon him in another
Ten days after the fortune-teller's re
lease, the magistrate died, and no one
could tell the reason why. -There were
those vcho remembered the prediction of
the former, and noised the fact about ;
and then certain persons, who believed
in such things, came to see him.
One night a lady came to him dls
guised In male attire
"I wint to speak with Senor Valencio,
"I an he," replied the fortune-teller,
He kaew her as the Countess Civao-J
ti for le was not what he seemed, and
had mether under very different circum-
stances but he kept this to him self and
treated ier as if she was a gentleman,
When alone with him, in his poorly-fur-
uished study, the lady said, ''Senor Val
encio, you are reported to know the fu-
ture to know of things and
tell why I
fore they happen can
am here ?"
"It is of course, impossible for me to
tell all things," he replied; "only what ation whatever. He told her, however,
. -tI. .... i- e :J c
is given me to know tor a purpose, i
wiil venture to say, however, in your
roco ihm vnn Rpktnbe informed how
vugv j j - i
ong the Count Civanti will live."
The kdv started, and her cheeks
erew paie. .
"Are all our secret thoughts; then,
known?" she exclaimed.
"Yes." returned Valencio, solemnly.
ail are known but all are not known
to mortals, else would some wicked
hands be stayed, sotne murderous deed
i "Who are you ?" demanded the other
turning full upon him, though the dim
light of the apartment did not permit her
a very distinct view of his features.
''Methinks," she said, coming up close
almost thrusting her face ijito his, "we
have met before."
-Ha ! that reice ? I know the tone of
command! You are, then, ao other
than Rondinelli, chief of brigands, whom
I first met among the wild hills over
shadowing Lake CelanoJ"
"Well, is the remembrance pleasant t
your ladyship ?" inquired the brigand,
"Bah! why seem to be astonished?
Do you suppose I know less of th Count
ess Civanti than she of Rondinelli ?"
"So, then," rejoined the countess, bi
ting her lips, " it seems that both have
secrets here !"
"And should both work for each oth.
er's interest 1" said the chief .of brig
ands. "What can I do to serve the fair
Countess Civanti ?"
"I suppose we can trust each other ?"
"I suppose we shall, if we separate
alive?" asked the countess.
"I think I do- the death of your hus
Band, for one thing."
'And what else ?"
"The death of the Duchess Ducar
"You do indeed know more of me
than I thought," said the countess, ga
zing upon him with an expression of
wonder. "For what purpose are you
"Your pardon, fair countess ! but that
is my secret. May I ask what broyghtJ
you to me ?"
"Well, I heard the story, through the
gossip of the servants, of a strange man
coming to this old house and shutting
himself up in complete seclusion of his
subseqaent arrest, imprisonment, and
prediction concerning the magistrate, and
siiuce that, of some other death-predictions
that have come to pass and I felt
a strong desire to consult him, thinking
it not improbable .that where it might be
to his interest ip predict a death, a death
would be certain to follow."
"In other words," said the bandit,
"you believe nie tp be a possessjonal
"Something of that kindt I confess."
"And now?" .
"I trust I have no reason to change
my opinion !" ,
"You arcplain and straightforward,
at all events." I don't object to lha
however. Well, now that we under-
wiiat do you requin
o me V
"Youjhare already named what I
I most desre."
"The leath of the count andtheduch.-
j ess?" i
J ",Yes ! and if you will undertake to rid
I me of these, you ha?e only to name your
'And what? of -.the Duke Ducarrar ?"
"Oh, he must not be harmed !" .
"I understand," said the brigand.
wi ih a peculiar look; 'the Countess Ci
vanti would wed the Duke Cucarrar?"
"Oh, man, seek not to know every
thing?'! exclaimed the lady, in a blightly
irritated tone, Come, will you un-
dertake what I want done?'
;i WH give you the means to accom-
Plish the work yourself, said the out-
law. "I have a colorless poison, mat is
slow but sure. It needs but a few drops
in a cup of water or wine. It produces
no pain, no suffering of any kind, and
its effects are not apparent for two or
days. Then the patient begins
t0 complain of weakness acd lassitude,
goes jnto a rapid decline, and dies in less
than a month. This poison cannot be
detected in the system, and there is not
a physician tbat knows its antidote.
"The very thing !" cried the countess ;
'give me that poison, and l will accom.
plish the rest."
The countess and the l- brigand finally
agreed upon terms. He sold ber tne
poison at a fabulous price, but would not
dispose of the antidote for any consider
tnat should sne aiscover any ireiuu ui
hers suffering from the effects of this
. i i
nnStnn t.i c.nma to him at occe. and ne
jyvi wu '
wotfld arrange with her to save the par
iy- ' - ...
For several weeks loDger Kondinelli
remained in that old house, never going
out himself, and now and then receiving
4. a. II. C a
ajrisiton unere was some taiK ui ui-
restinghim again; but there was an op
posing influence in high quarters, and it
was not done. It would not have been
done, had the police even attempted it
for the fortune-teller, as he was sup
posed to be, was not isolated and alone,
rs even his nearest neighbors believed.
He had known the house before he went
to it, and why it was supposed to be
haunted. It was connected wijh a dis
tant point by a subterranean passage.and
he had been in communication with his
band from the Very first. There was
no time that he could not have brought
a thousand desperate men to his assis
tance ; but he had chosen rather to be
arrested at first, thinking it might fovor
his design, which it did.
And this design of Rondinelli, the
bandit, whose name was a terror
throughout Itlay, was a singular one, to
the best. He had come to Naples to be
enobled to gain a title that should give
him a rfght to an honored seat among the
proudest of the land. And how was this J
to be accomplished ? Strange as it may
seem, by means of the wonderful poison
he possessed. He "understood Neapo
litan intrigue. He knew there" were,
many among me noDinty wno wisnea
wives, husbands, and rivals dead, that
they might change their own-'condition ;
and he relied npon eventualy disposing of
his subtile poison to see parties, who. in
using it, would see tneene.cts see ceatn
certainly result, in spite ci all the med
ical skill of Naples ; but in no case
for no consideration, would he dispose of
the antidote; and, by retaining this, he
would leave himself the "only master of
life. - -
"Suppose," he reasoned, "that some
one, after having used my poison, should
see its effects upon himself, or some dear
friend supposs, again, that self or
friend shoild be among the highest no
bility .touching even royalty would not a
title ay, even a dpke.dom.r-be given in
eichange fer life ?"
The result indeed proved that Eondin.
elli did not miscalculate in many particu
lars, His general scheme prospered.
The ambitious and unprincipled Countess
Civanti, in carrying out her own wicked
design, . assisted his materially. She
poised her husband and the duchess, and
saw them both die, and thus became fa
miliar with all the workings of the dead
ly drug. The bandit knew she intended
to marry the Duke Ducarrar. Now was
his time. By means of one of his secret
agents, who had obtained the position of
butler in the duke's household, he had
several drops of the poison put into his
grace's wine. A few days served todis
play the symptoms whih the countess
now so well understood, and in terribleJ
rage and alarm she hastened to the rob-
"The Puke Ducarrar is dying of your
cursed poison '."she cried, in a wild,lofty
tone, with flashing eyes.
"Yes," coolly replied the brigand
chief, "it respects no rank, sex, nor age."
"You know of this, then?" almost
screamed the countess. ; "Now, save him,
villain, or I will have you torn limb from
"Softly, my fair murderess !". return
ed the bandit,, fastening his deep blut
eyes upon hers with an expression thai
mde her quail; "rsmember who you
ire that speaks who 1 am that you ad
dress!" You should rather humbly su
or my aid than attempt ro command t
hrough threats. If you were to hav
ne torn limb from limb, the duke would
lie without making you his wife; and
? I were to say you poisoned your hut
band and the duchess, you tan imagine
what a fearful doom would be vours.
But putting all this aside, it is you that
ire in my power. You cannot stir hence
except by my permission. I can touch
this wire you see here, within reach of
my hand, and in less than an hour, a
thousand desperate men would gather to
my aid, some of them coming from your
own household, some from th duke's,
and others again from the royal palace.
Now, I see by your pale cheeks and
vondering looks, you begin lo compre
hend with whom you are dealing, and
now we will endeavor to converse in rea-
son, Yon remember l told you that it
you saw a friend suffering from this dead
ly poison to come to me, affd" we would
arrange to save him. I will save the
duke; but J must have my price no
less than a full pardon, and a title of no
bility not bejow that of a count. The
duke has great influence at court, and I
am'certain can procure wljat I demand
to save his life,"
It may well be believed that the hough-
ty countess was amazed at the audacity
or this. chief of robbers 5 but she was
already within his toils, and was obliged
to work out his design to save herself
and lover. ,
The result was the fulfilling of the
ambitious scheme of Rondinelli. , fie re
ceived a full pardon for past offences.and
to the surprise of every one not in the
secret was created a peer of th realm.
The old nobles would hays shuned him,
but that they feared for their own Jives ;
and go outwardly they courted his socie
ty, while at heart they detested him.
He purchased himself a palace furnished
it gorgeously, and for a few months liv
ed in regal style, at the end of which
time he was found assassinated.
As for the wicked and amitious count
ess, she succeeded in her desighrand be
came the Duchess Ducarrar ; but she and
her new lord soon after quarrelled and
separated. He subsequently died of
poison, supposed to have beep adminis
trated through her agency. She was
tered on suspicion, but stabbed her
self to the heart, and died the miserabje
death of the suicide.
So, one after another, ultimateie per
ished our workers of iniquity, and yet
Naples renaajned no less full of intrigue
The Great Wars A Historical Be
Tlew and Contrast.
The present conflict in this country is
one of those which are usually called
civil wars ;" and though nothing of the
kind has ever before been carried on on
the same stupendous scale, yet there are
plenty of precedents for it.
One of the earliest of these is the fa
mous Pelopennesjan War, which began
B. C 432 and lasted 27 years, betsveen
States of Greece, which, fcad they adop
ted the idea of Pericles and been united
under one general head, might have
formed a nation of marvebus grandeur
and influence. But the doctrines of
'State, Sovereignty" or "autonomy" pre
vailed, and after twenty-seven years of
warfare foreign invasion closod the com
bat. In the 'Monthly Religious J&agazint
for Febuary. there is an interesting his
torical review ofcivil wars ; on the sub
ject of the Peloponnesian war, the wri-,
ter says :
This long and deadly warfare could
not have been prolonged through twenty
seven years, except for the fact that both
Sperta and Athens were based on sla
very. The slave tilled the soil the cit
izens waged war. Slavery not only sup
plied the munitions; but it gave to the
war a savage ferocity and brutality.
Athens alone had four hundred slaves to
sixty thousand freemen.
But Sparta was made pre-eminently
tarbarous ai.d inhuman by the habit of
domineering ourselves. During the
progress of the war, fearing an insurrec
tionamong her Helots at home, she pro
claimed liberty to such as would come
-orward and join her armies. Twothoui
'nd brave rnn sprung up to the ..word
"liberty," and pretented ihemsees.
.. uey were irever heard of more. Thej
vere led off secretly andmassacred
ind, by thisfiendish treachery, the oli
garchs rid their.sel?es of such slaves a?
vould be most' likely to proye a'danger
us element at home.
It is curious to contrast the numbers
tngaged in our war with those iiEgaged
i.i the great wars of the past
We select two decisive battles. One
of these was fought in the h,arbor of Syr
acuse. In an exepdition against Sicily.
Athens had strained every nerve and
equiped a magnificent fleet and army.
They sailed out oflha Piraeus with
sound of trumpets, peans and libations of
wine froia gold and silver cups. This
great army consisted of o,UUU heavy
armed infantry. It was reinforced, by
another of, about tthe same number.
When gatherered atSyracuse they num
bered in alLr-heavy armed, ..infantry, na
tivesof the island and slaves who were
light armed and only employed as skir
mishers 20,000 men. Tbis, in the lan
guage of Thucydides, made her power
i i i
appear "stupendous," anu ner resources
The final and decisive battle was that
of Algospotani, when Athens lost her
fleet, and nearly her whole army was
surprised and taken prisoners. The
numbers engaged in battle are not told ;
but the Dumber of prisoners, who were
native Athenians, i3 recorded as three
thousand, which seems to have made up
the bulk of her army in ib last decisive
As to the number engaged, the little
State of Massachusetts has furnished
more men ih our present struggle than
fought on both sides in the great English
rebellion. It hasent more men into the
field than Julius Cpcser commanded to
gain the empire of the world ; more than
all the-troops of Hellas put together in
the long struggle that rent her in pieces
when her sun went down in blood. The
State of New York has equiped tmore
soldiers than all the troops of Caesar and
Pompey put together, though drawn from
every province, from the Euphrates to
the pillars of Hercules. The whole ar
my of Cromwell would only serve as skir
mishers, or as a detail for a "raid" from
the army of Grantor Sherman, His
great military fame was gained by man
aging twenty-five thousand men; and its
marches and evolutions were within an
area less thanthe State of Virginia.
The great civil war of England, known
as "the Great llebellion," was also a con
flict between the oligarchs and the com
mons; calied again the Cavaliers and
the Boundheads; railed again, more ap,
propriately, the King and his Parlia
ment. It divided England horizontally
the king and lords and theMbi.shops on
one side, the commons on the other;
and it decided the question forever,
whether constitutional government was
a possible boon to the cnglish race.
The war opened in 1642,'and continu
ed seven years. It would probably have
been fiinithed in half that time, but for
the hesitancy and half measures of Es
sex, the first parliamentary general.
TJie first conflict of Edgehill has its ex
act parallel in Amis Lam. It was a
drawn battle : both the parties laying all
night on their arms ; but in the morning
Hampden came up wi'h four thousand
fresh men. Julius Csesar would have
followed up quickly the former day's
work, and with blow upon blow, finished
the loyalist and the war. Instead of
this, the armies "looked at each other,"
dreaded to renew the figbt, and drew off
each by itself, much to the chagrin and
disgust of Hampden. Five: thousand
were left slain upon the field slain to
no purpose, as nothing was decided. So
things went on, till Oliver Cromwell
came with his "ironside regiment" and,
at the decisive battle of Naseby, dashed
upon the King's forces and shivwredH
them in pieces.
We may smile, on reading over these
great battles, at the nubers engaged.
They varied from twenty-five thqusand
men on,each side, never exceeding the
latter number. The battle ef Marston
Moor was the most obstinately contested
between "the most numerous armies that
were engaged during the course of these
wars ; and in that battle, as Hume la
ments, fifty thousand troops were led to
mutual slaughter. Such was the price
; aid; tne end achieved , was fre gov
ernment for the English race emy-
The writer in he Religious JUontMy,
deduces from the facts he relate several
arguments. First comes ore in favor cf
the : cultivation of .a naikcal "military
spirit as the surest way cf avoiding tba
shedding of llocdiest of al- Grsar, in
a three years' war betweeii the Cccsar
ens and Pornpeians, lost fewer men
than McClellan did in a single campaiga
on the Peninsula. Indeed it is said,
mor,e Jies have been lost in cur present
war than the.great cival wars cf Greeca
Rome and England put together : and
this might-have been avoided had the
North been a military people- ;
It is well to look into the gulf cf ruia
from which our present civil -war is to
save us. Resolving the Union intothir-ty-sevensovereignties
wouldj place us
exactly where theGreek'Autonoraies
were plaped, in their struggTe of twenty
seven years. , It means -mutual slaugh
ter and fiipal collapse, tint! some etron
ger third power comes in anl adjusts tha
bleeding fragments. Persia finally "iar
tervened 'favprof; Spar'.a ; aid her
hasteful despotism waspresied down up
on all the States of Hellas md her lover
ly islands. Thebes finally rebelled
against it, ledonby ;the great Epamin
ondas ; and a second series of cival wart
broughton a more completj exhaustion,
and a more deadly collapse.
Phillip of Macedonnext "intervened,"
and crushed them still lover into tha
dust, amid the dying thunders of Demos--thenps,
and the fading glories cf the
Greciap name. Next Roma interven-.
ed" and conquered Macedonia; and
both Macedonia and Hellai, went down
together under her . iron heel. Next
the Turk"irjtervened;" and Jlcme.'ia
all her Eastern empire, involving Gre tea
with her ancient States t.nd beautiful
isles, jvas eclipsed in a more baleful dej
poti?m and in heathen night. Such are
the last results of autonomy. dismem
berment, mutuaj hate and slaughter,
tional extinction and death. So thelovet
liest form of antjent civilization, in a
democracy just rising to the. glories of
empire, was sacrificed the insane bg.
tion of pretty "State sovereignty;" and
when we now ask, Where 13 Helli3?
we are only snswered by poets, who iing
her elegy : . -
Who treads all tearless pn her halloTstJ pave;
Inreke the spirits of the past, aad shtd
The voice of your strong bidding on the deal !
Lo,from a thousand crumbling tombs thej ris
The great of old, the powerful sad the wise I
And a sad tale, which none but Ihcr can tell
Falls on the mournful silence Ij ce a knoll.
Then mark yon lonely pilgrim 1 end and weep
Above the mound where geniuilies ia sleep.
And is this all ? Alas J we turn n vain
And, turning, meet the self-saue waste agalo-i
The same irear wilderness of stern decay;
Its for mer pride, the phantom f a day ;
A song of summer birdsj within i bower ;
A dream of beauty graced upea n, floTer ;
A itte whose master chord has ?eased to sound ;
A morning star struck drkiing t9 the ground.'
A student in one ef our Btata coHegesS
was charged by the Faculty with' hav
ing bad a barrel of ale deposited in his
room, contrary of course,' to rule and
usage. He received t summons to ap
pear before the President, who said ;'
"Si-, I am informed that you hare a
barrel of ale in your'room."
"Well, whaexplanatioa . can ycQ
Why, the fact is, sir, my physiciaa
advised me to try a little ale ear-h day,
as a tonic, and not wishing to stop at tha
various places where thia beverage 13
retailed, I concluded iq have a barrel
taken to my room."
"Indeed ! And have ycu derived an
benefit from it ?"
"Ah ! yes, sir. Wrhen (he barrel waj
first taken to my room, twu weeks sinca,
I could scarcely lift it. Now I can car
ij ii wiiu me greatest easj. '
A fat man called upon a physician ta
prescribe for his disease, which he said
was sleeping with his mou:h open.-
Sir," said the doctor, "your diieasa
is incurable; your skin is too short, co
that when youahut your eyes.your mouth.
t'Please, mister, giVe rx.e sfbundle
"Yes, my son. Sixpenay cr ehillinj
bundle ?" . .
MIs it for your father p
"No guess 'tant that'i for the hs4
My father don't eat hay J" .
" MPorapey; Fse got one of da worst wo.
man for a wife dat any nigger etba'r
had. Ah, Pompey, I thii.k
Woman's lub is like injua. rubber, ' -It
streach de more, de more lab her."
Woman's lub am like Sooto i sou? "
I got one pinch, and dat's f:aga"."
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