Nebraska Newspapers

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All trarknt 2v.rtii-eMi.ts tuusi fIJ in a
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jj- Bxk Work, nJ Plain and Fancy Job Work,
neir. tbe tt and or; aart notice.
LIJ3EUTY AND UNION, ONE AND INSEPARABLE, N Q W AND FO TIE V ER."
Ailkioid oi J-.l, :i k a-il.3r I j'-T2i"5. d. r,e in
VOL. IX.
BROWNVILLE, NEBRASKA, THURSDAY, DECEMBER, 29, 1864.
NO. J 5.
riEBSASKA-ADVERTISER:
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15 "Tfc 1 N Eb GAUDS.
Jfiffinry & Dress-making
NISS K. It KARRIS,
Tiihto inform the ladiei of BrownTille nd
rlrici'J that ne La jnt otctnenred a firt claw
MILLINERY k DRESS MAKING
TVbcr work be d..r.e with jreat fare nJ
r,:nc..'-i'i a-"'" te 'r',-cst -ieni ttjles.
Bleach irig. an 1 irairing d-.ne in the rvrj bwt
f:vi!ilon fb.tft notice, il. nse cl! at the reii-g.-Two
f -rrncrlv t-ccui ;ci J. W. CoUomo.
Llr'.r.v!le, My 4r.li,
i "STIT -H 15 THTZ SAVES EIKE'"
ITILDTCR,
In at bin j"nt y;t, rrnly to jxrforui li work,far
taining tu Lrbuine?s.
H-iuie and '.?n paiDting, glaring;, and faper h,rjj
irr, etc-at nhort notice, and tbe moBt approved
atrlc. Termseaph. Give Lim a call.
Shop on Main Street, eai of Atkinson's Cloth
inf; Store.
Ur. irnvillo, April 7, ly.
" B. G. HARE'S
SKYLIGHT GALLERY
I ihe v'm-e to se your Tictnes. He it irpjiarM to
ke 'i k.nj of Picture lavse Fizeu pti.-t..graihs,
ii'i.M'''y;ie. k.r.
lie kerp-. n a Trcn-selccte1 stock of Albums
ai1 Fi.'ii'.cn'i'ti pN.
Ti e ne ti.-werr i n-?h aie of main Ctrert oppo
f J'.f u A. P' iii ' S; e. Persons win do well te
eai' mil, t-ctore pc'vnr work dne elsewhere.
Pi icular pan s tVii witlj cliilJrun, also in copying
till Pictures. U4rk-ret, 11 it, green, or piaiis are
fiKji coiurt for ct,i' Ircu's dretse.
J OS EI II L. ROT,
BAB3ER AND II 11 II-DRESS OS.
Vain St.,f'p)3itt P. 0. L'ailding bet. lt and 21.
HrtiT tVtnk? to patron for former LIithI
ftro age, and ig still on hnt;d rcaJj "lo thive,
.Liin. ion ail d hiir in tLeb.'5t Ftjie.
l;rii...c, April 21, "oJ. i:." -S-ly.
CIIAS. g7dorsey.
VTTOBXEY AT LAW
CKOWXYILLE; NEBRASKA.
April U h. IS64. nV2v8yly
F. STEWART, LI. D.,
PHYSlClAiJ 3f.HD SUF.GEQI1.
,-:outh Eaft ronirr of Maio and First Street
OrriCB IIoVRS 7 to a. li.aad 1 to 2 and C',' t
7i r. at .
Brom-nrille, Kebraka. l!ay 5th, 1S'.4- Ko Jo, It.
E. S. BUKXS, M. D.,
PHYSICIAN l SURGEON!
Nemaha, City, TT .17-
OFFICE AT U1S UEtjlUEXCE.
Jn'r 2th,lS''l. . nl7-vS-pd1y
V. M. C. PERKINS,
Great Western Pnotograpli
- First .i33r f v;t of DrDwrar'lle Hoiie,
BKOWNVll.LK-N.T.
'r.'.(i re;je tfully ainiunf to the politic that he
- B !-! u4. a S'v Lis-'ht ;:;e'F. and i ow prepared
'r every I.ii-I. .jk ixt lyif of pr'ture kimwn t
i t. i t::o la'est aud i.t i'r ri-d ftyles.
- i l.nrer prire.i ttmn anr other artit -est of S-.
i- efti. Ttwse wi-hin-picture will tlnj it ureatly tc
xci' lnt"-et n. ca!i auit riauune Lis iinieni and
'.'-t before f' iut elsewhere.
All LiaJs of Picturt-s copied into Photo-
lT-7-Stn
3DVARD W. THOMAS,
ATTORHEY AT LAW,
AD
SOLICITOR IN (JIIANCERY,
:?. r.TtfT of Vain aui rirst Streets.
RHUWNVILLE, NEI3RASKA.
V7all Pzpir Ws.ll Fspcr ! !
CiiiUctiy on Land at lr.,ln' Tailor Shop, by
LOUS WAvLaiTCi:,
Piaer-hansirc d ne iu the niuat arrroved itr:. nd
TowrT-ille. Kt-ti Jnr.e 3
IIljIjIlTEnT GOOTiS!
32 RS. MARY IICTTETT,.
"Sa Aunotncea to tbe ladies of B'ownyi'.le and Ti--J
cinity, that sbe ts: jrt received from itie
-w East a magnificent lo.k ot
ALL LZTD WUTTES HILLIXTLY GOODS,
Consisting of
"iies and Tiisses ronnts tnd Jlats, Eib
bous, Flowers, &c.
" which rte invite? the attention of the ladies, fee! -ured
ttey canuot te better acited in style, qnai
'Tor price.
RE A VIS,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
FALLS CITY, ETLBRAKKA.
C?" Win pracuce in all the :
ITew Remedies fci
SPERMATORRHOEA
HOWARD ASSOCIATION
i r , . rnrLADELPniA.
f"f Institution ttta.blv.hrd by tvtciel -Comment,
for me Relief tk Sck and Distreued.
J7Icf4 vuk Virulent an J Chrouic bueatet. ani
erpecxal.n for the Cure of Dueatu of the Sexual
Orpant. .
HEDICAi JLDVTCE Jiren aTatia, by the Acting
ireeon.
Valuable Ke-sorta on Spermatorrhea, ard other dla
K4of the bezaal Oreans, and on tbe NEW REVK
iS employe! m tbe inipensary, aeut in sealed lettei
1 op'Ireof rgt. Twoor threeStamps accepu
Wraa VI. . StILLTK HOrGIITOK. Iloward Aa
''atiun. K. t, RoatnKuith Street, Pti lade IpUia, Pa.
niber ll, i36i. nU-y
The Latest Popular Konscnsc.
The following h'jl,ly elegant and inte'.lectnal pro
duction it aaid to be tbe "very latest" in LcnJon.
It it furg, whistled, danced, bummed and grunted
by eTerybvdy old enon h to walk :
THE 'DKRIBLE TALE.
0 ! it's Vrribie tale I'm going ?o tell.
' Of a sad mitfortune that befell
A family that once resided'
In the very selfsame street that I did.
0 ! it is ench a 'orrible tale,
It's sure to make your checkf turn pale,
Your eyes with tears will be over-run ;
Wig-Wv, wfggiety, wigglety. um.
They'neTer aaw dj ecmfAET
Tho' a highly rcrpectable family,
Till ach grew more sadder and eadder,
And each wu affri'btcd at the tilher'a thauow.
TLey pu"cd down the tlinda to kecp-out the
light
Till ere-y thing was dark as night; "
And as they were determiried,on suieidine;,
I'll tell yon the manner they respectively died in.
One day as their father in tbe garden did walk,
Ee cut his throat with a piece of chalk ;
The mother an end to her life did put,
By Lacirg heistif in tke watar butt;
The youngest daughter on beaded knies,
She poicor.ed her&tlf with totftUd iheesr
The jounget, sou a determined fel' .w ,
Iiiew out his brains with an old umbrella
The gard'eercame in and (aw the blood,
lie run Liuxself through with a piece of rhubab :
His wife saw the sight and it, turned her savage
riLe burnt herseli with a red pickled cabbage.
The old torn cat as be sat by tin fire,
Hit a piece off the fender and then did expire;
The flie of the ceiling, their cae was the, wors'n
Fvr they blew themselves up witn spontane
ous combustion.
The eld cow in the ld cow hed,
Took ud the pitchfork and knock'd off her head!
The little donkey hearing the row,
Knocked out hit brains with t bedhead of the
cow.
O ! it it inch a 'orrible tale,
If 'a sure to make your cheeks tore pale,
Your eyes with tears will be over-run;
iggfJ. wigglety , wigglety, warn .
kd Stag.
IT Kcne sf my Essiness.
BT 3iaC. HAXSIET B. STOWE.
TL-13 was one of the golden sayings of
Jedediah PettisoL One might think so
at least, by the frequency and emphasis
with which it fell from his lips. Jede
diah was reckoned one of the richest
men in the village of Keedwal. He
lived in that great white house you see
yonder, with the tufis of lilacs before
each of tbe front windows, the great su
gar maples in the grassy yard, the light,
neat picket-fence ; the large tarn so per
fectly built, so trimly kept, and surround
ed by the well-tended acres of the richest
farm of the neighborhood. Jedediah
was reputed a snug, safe man an excel
lent manager of money of which he
had laid by an untold store, how much it
was difficult to say, but there was a.
"slow, dry smile" which curled his hard
features when the inquiry was made,
that stimulated the imagination of the
questioner more than the mention of any
definite sura. Jedediah was an excellent
householder in all things that pertain to
his own. His wife lacked for nothing
rustled to church in the stiflVst of silks
and the heariest of satans, woTe an In
dia shawl and got her bonnets quarterly
from New York, to the great edification
of Miss Pewit, the country milliner, and
of all her rural ncigbors. All Jedediah's
sons and daughters walked in brightness
and lived on the fat of the land ; they
wpnt to the best schools, wore the best
clothes, ate the best things, .nrla-ere re
ported to do everything in the best way,
He rubbed his hands as he looked around
on his rising race. - He flattered himself
there were no such children going. He
took care of them ; they were his, and
Jedediah always took care of his own
things. Vhatsoever was his; though but
the bread:h and thickness of a hair, was
his. and was attended to with microscop
ic nicety.
But to all that was ncl Lis, to every
body not his own. to everyone's cares,
wants, oujside the circle of his own, Jed
ediah had one short.' golden saying: "It's
known of my business."
Jedediah was a proper, church going
man nay, a church member, and, being
a church member, his townsmen thought
the least they could do for a man of such
ubstanc and admirable arrangement
was to make him a deacon. They hoped
thereby, in a measurt, to bring the affairs
of the church into the charmed circle
whict he called his own. They were
much mistaken. He was too shrewd for
them.
If they think they're going to get
their burdens off onto my shoulders tb?y
are mistaken. I pay my subscription
punctually ; that's all I agreed to do ; as
to the rest, it's cot my business."
If a subscription was up for any char
itable object, Jedediah was very acute in
findinrr out that it tras cone cf his busi
ress. "Subscribe to town library? No;
what do I want of a town library ? I am
ibl to buy all the books I want, And pre
fer to read my own books."
4But, Sir. Pettisol, think how many
of your neighbors are not, and what an
excellent thing for them it would be!"
"Well, let them get it,it?s none of my
business, I'm sure ; we've more books
than we can read now."
Mr. PettissI, we called to see if ynu
would subscribe foi a furnace for the
church." v
"No. What's the use of a furnace?
The stove keeps us comfortable enough."
lour pew'and two or three about it,
are comfortable ; but the galleries, where
the poorer people sit, and the pews by
the door in short, half the pews in the
house are very uncomfortable."
Now, Mr. Pettisol was a very orthodox
man, arid believed devoutly every one of
the" fire points of. Calvanism ; and he
could set any young minister right, m a
twinkling, that blundered tn them. He
kept an austere watch on his new pastor,
Mr, Service, whom he suspected, some
how, of not having precisely the good
old waj-s, "I don't hear you preash the
strong old points," would say ; "Divine
sovereignty and election," and the min
ister smiled in a manner that Mr. Petti
sol wondered at.
"Did you ever hear of this doctrine,
Mr. Pettisol ? 'Look not every man on
his own things, but every man on the
things of others.' "
"That isn't a doctrine," said Mr. Pet
tisol ; "it's a declaration of the Bible."
Why isn't it a doctriae ?" said Mr.
Service, and left him.
Mr. Pittisol felt for seme time that
dull, confused sensation in his brain that
is produced by a new idea fumbling at
the rusty lock of a very old door. He
had supposed himself primed in all the
ins and outs of doctrine ; and in all this
time nobody had ever said such a singu
lar thing to him as this. It confuse him,
and he put it out of his head, The min
ister was young and modest; he suppos
ed hi had dropped a seed which he hoped
would germinate he did not make al
lowance for that flock of domestic fowls
called old prejudices, who make it their
business to gobble up all such seeds.
When he thought the seed had germina
ted he called on Jedediah, to open a case
which lay heavily on his mind and in
which no one in his parish was better
able to give him material aid.
There had recently been a factory es
tablished in a distant part of his parish,
which had brought into the place a iarge
population of young lads and girls, who,
as often happens in such cases, seemed
to be under very indifferent moral influ
ences. Sunday was a perfect carnival of
ut seemly proceedings. The boys ma
rauded through the fields, robbed orch
ards and melon patches, and the girls,
daunting in gay dressers and laughing
loudly, were often seen in certain dubi
ous coflee-houses, which had sprung up
liLe mushrooms in the neighborhood of
the factory. Mr. Service, with two or
three energetic, self-denying men and
women of his parish, had ventured ituo
this region and set up a Sabbath School,
and succeeded in producing some interest
in bettor things.
That morning, at table, Mr. Service
said to his wife. "If I only were rich,
now, I know what I would do. IM put
up a neat little hall for our Sunday
school, and have a library in it, and I
could draw ip ever so many ; it might
become the uuclues of a church as well
as serve for the use cf a Sunday-school.'
"Well, let's get up a subscription for
it." said his wife, "there's Deacon Pet
tisol owns the land, perhaps heil give
us that."
"I doubt it," said Mr. service.
"O, yes ; only go and talk to him tell
him all about it he can't refuse."
So that evening Mr. Service called at
fir. Pettisol 's, and was cordially receiv
ed ; some fine pears and grapes were
offered to him in the best front parlor,
and Mrs. Pettisol and Mr. Pettisol were
delighted to see him.
He told his story.
"I hardly see what call you Lave to
meddle with thatfactory peculation,"
said Mr, Pettison. "If I mistake not,
the factory sands the other side of the
town line, and its the business cf Smith
Si Simonds to provide such thingsif any
body. Why don't you go to ihera?"
"I have been to them, and they are
mere money making men of the world,
and don't'eare for anything of the sort.''
"Well, then," said Jedediah,"! be
lieve the faptory, in point of fact, stands
in Mr. Brown's parish." . .
Perhaps, in mere point of geography,
the line may run this side of thd factory,
but in point of fact, the people'are much
nearer to us than to him. TL9 fact is,
Mr, Pettisol, it is for our interest to take
care of this population, or they w'll cur
rupt the state'of morals among us. These
roviDg, idle young men and hoys, bright
and active, will be leading away the
boys of this parish ; even now. the Sab
bath is dreadfully profained among us."
"I'll risk my children,"jsaid Mr. Pet
tisol. "I can'4 cut down all the dock
weed in my neighborhood, or clear off
all the caterpillars from ny neighbor's
trees, but I can keep th weeds off my
own farm."
"I doubt it," sa:d Mr. Service; "but if
you could, it wonld be less wo'k to cut
'down oneftalk cf dockweed, green in
your neighbors' field, than to hoe up
a thousand young docks after the wind
bad seeded -ourfarra with them. If any
one would have made it their business
to clear the caterpillars eff the wild cherry-tree
at the head of the street, vou
would have saved two days' ivork in jour
orchards about."
4iI know that," said Mr. Pettisol; but
I ain't going to do other people's work.
That tree .standson Jim Sientou'? ground,
and if he 'don't attend to it, I ain't going
to do it for him, I'm sure." .
"Not if it fills every tree . of your or
chard with caterpillars ?" said Mr. Ser
vice.
'I can take care of my own trses,"
aid Mr. Pettisol. "I'd rather do twice
the work on c y own place than to work
that isn't mv business."
!
"Mr. Pettisol," said "Mr. Service,
have you thought any of that doctrine I
spoke to you about ?''
"What doctrine, sir ?"
"Look not every man on his own
things, but every man en the things of
others."
What do you think of that doctrine! it's
in the Bible as plain as the doctrine cf
election."
At this point Sir. Pettisol beran to
have secret doubts of the validity of
Poul's epistles but he (fid not venture to
assert ihem in so many words, so he
passed the grape dish again to his min
ister, and said: "I trust I am always
redy to do my duty in my on field.---But
I believe in order, sir, order; in eve
ry ne sticking to his business. Now we
have engaged you, sir, to attend to us
keep up our preaching, and weekly Iec
ture. and prayer meeting, and really.)
sir, I don't see how you can burden your
self with this work without taking the
strength you need for. your main busi
ness." "Mr. Pettisol," said Mr. Service, "I
do not consider mysalf in th light of a
man hired to take care of you, merely ;
I am the shepherd and servent of Christ. J
and my duty is to all wandering souls
whem I am able to reach and care for ;
but if I thought of nothing but your in
terest and that of your children, I would
gladly do twice as much as I do now for
this population ; it is the cn!y way I can
save th children and youth of my parish
from corruption."
I don't ihink you can an?wer for your
boye, or I for mine, Mr. Pettisol; boys
are more attracted by boys than they are
by fathers, and mothers, and if they are
gay, lively fellows, who keep some kind
of Jolly thing going, they care very lit
tle what ?talion they belong to."
"I shall ferbid my sons all tuch asso
ciations," said Mr. Pettisol; "and I
should like to see any of them dare to
disobey me.,'
"I should not," said Mr. Service, "nev
ertheless, I fear they will."
."Well, perhaps I may feel it my duty
to give something," said the deacon.
"If yoa would only give us that lot of
land this side of the factory, to put bur
hall cn," said Mr. Service.
"Why. Mr. Serrice, you ain't up in
business matters." soid Mr Pettisol. with
a patronizing smile ; ''that lot cf land is
rising in value ten per cent, a year."
"For all that, I think it would be jour
best investment to give it for this cause.
It is in one sense far more our business
of the owners cf ihe fac :.. ry. They da
cot live here. They have no children
here. They wili'rsu, in their persons or
families, fufTer as.f.ve shall, from leaving
them to go to ruin."
" Who wants them to go to ruin ?"
said Mr. Pettisol ? "Cant they rcine to
our church if they want to? There art
free seats in' the gallery, without cur go
ing down to LuilJ a place for them."
"But thoy won't come to our churc.h
and expriaace has shown they will ceme
to a piace appropriated to them alone.
Our poor little loom i3 crowded every
Sunday, and seme go awa-y . for want cf
room
J Well, Mr. Service, I'll think cf it,
i and send you something, though I must
say I don't think as yen. do. If people
won't attend the stated means cf grace,
I really don't see the need of going down
on our knees to them it's their own af
fair after all."
'The Lord Jesu3 didn't think it our
own affair whether we went to destruc
tion or not," said Mr. Service. "He
did much more, cue would think, than
his part. "We were enemies, and he
left heaven for us, lived poor all his life,
did the worst of deaths; and is he to do
all this for us and we feelt hat we are not
to lift a finger for"ach other 1
"Well, well, Mr. Service, I'll think
cf it, and let you know. I'll subscribe
something," said Mr. Pettisol, and so the
minister rose and left."
"He is a good man," my dear," said
Jedediah Pettisol. 4I believe Mr. Ser
vice is a very good man but I doubt
his orthodoxy.'
'Why, my dear,' said Mrs. Pettisol,
'what makes you doubt h;3 orthodoxy ?"
Oh, these modern young ministers
with their humanitarian notions, want to
carry the world on their shoulders, but
they're dumb oa the doctrines. He says
he believes them, but he don't preach
them. Haven't heard a sermon on di
vine sovereignty and man's dependence
since he's been here. If he had more
faith in that he would be quieter.'
I think,' said Mrs. Pettisoll, 'what he
f paid a jout our children i3
redicu'ous
I'd rik our Juhncy 'any where-
yoc'r linli fellow, he went to bed with
ib? heachtche,"ear'y this evening.'
The fact v a 3 that 'our Jonny,' at the
mornem these words wera spokea, was
far enough from his ted. He was, in
fact, down at Smith's factory, learning
to play poker winh Mike Donor, a sharp,
shrewd, adroit, droll fellow, who led all
ihe.loyscf the village, and had taken
en'ire possession of Johnny Pettisol.
The next morning Mr. Pettisol en
closed in a very cold note, seveniy-fire
cents to his minister.
Shortly after secret disitisfaction
arose in the parish. Mr. Service was
accused of heresy. There was a great
meeting of counsels, much talk and dis
cussion. Tccr Mr. Service was bad
gered ar.d baited, and obliged to spend
so many anxious hours, and to much
tiiiiie and strength in explaining exactly
his views of the consistency of God's de
crees with human ability, and in defining
the exact state of the heathen in the fu
ture world, that the heathen in Smith
ville were If ft to go oa their own way.
In a short time Mr. Service was dismiss-
i ed. the church hired ministers at ten del
a SaLfcalh l0 surpIy the p:3tp;t a cd
said that th is vya eojnomy, Grog-sbop3
grew up in the village, the poor-house
increased its intr.ates, boys grew up god
less, dissipated young men broke their
father's and mother's hearts, and Johnny
Pettisol first and foremoit.
There were days, long and bitter whsn
Mr. Pettisol, old and trembling with par
alyisis, and hi3 wife, rad and broken
hearted, wept over their spendthrift, ua
dutiful sons, and wondered why they
should have turned out so bad in spite of
such excellent . instructiens. The dock
weec and catterpillars could not be got
cct of Jedediah'sfielJ.vuthall his energy;
and in his own secret soul, while tremb
ling on he vercre of eternity.and review
ing the use he had male of his life, he
sometimes remembered Mr. Service.and
wished he had given more thought to
the great doctrine. "Look not every ma a
on his own things, but everyrnaa also on
the things of others."
There is a gentleman in Boston who,
hjs an income of S36o,lo0; S 1,000 per
day, with a little pocket money extra,
A nephew of Gov. Vance, -of North
Carolina, is under arrest at Matamoras j
for robbing a stage.
Over 200,000 was cleared at the Na-1
ti.-T.r.l Sailors' fair, B;tcn.
Cqbeb Saloon.
Will yau walk into taj parlor ?"
Fa'd the spider te the fly ;
"Tis the prettiest littler pirter
That ever jnn did spy
I Suppose the children hsv? all read
this little song many a tixe, and won
dered at the fiy that was so stupid E3 not
to -ee through the deceitful invitation ef
the spider, before h rzr:i Tn 'the
net. But there are a great many people
mere stupid than was that fly. And
that spider was more cunning than some
people are. This spider called his trap
of ruin a parlor, but it was in reality on
ly a "Cobweb salocn."
You knew what a saloon is ? Chil
dren in cities snd villages know, and I
! am afraid some of the larger ones some
times are tempted to go into thfm
, I was not long since passing along a
street in one of our western cities, and
read in large glowing letters, the sign.
"Cobweb Saloon." "Cobweb Saloon.'' 1
repeated to myself, "that is a very sin
gular name for a saloon." I kept think
ing, "Cobweb Saloon! what can it
mean ?'' I knew that "Saloon" was
often but a soft name posted ever the
doors of driuking rooms, while behind
their blinded doors or red curtains, were
sold the fiery drinks that make demensn
of men ay, of boys too; that they often
proved the mere pass-ways to gambling
and ether and worse vices, leading to
infamy and complete ruin.
I thought of all of these and .then I
said, "The name is just as it sLoud be
it tells the whole story." Look at .a
fly in a spider's web, and then teil me if
it is not a pretty good representation cf
a man fairly cai?ght in cne of jhese sa
loons. His legs have become so entan
gled in the cobwebs that he cannot walk;
his brains all so covered over with the
cobweb that he cannot think straight;
his tongue ia so wound around wiih
them thathe cannot talk plainly. Yes
he has
"Gone down th,. windinsatair,"
he is in the "parlor" of the spider, and
unless some friendly hand tears off the
webs and takes him away, he will never
come .out alive. The bite cf the spider is
said te be very pois onous, causing tor
menting pain.and certain death. Lsok at
ths drunkard; how bloated is his face ?
how blood-shot are his eye3 1 and how he
raves when that terrible disease, deliri
um tremens, comes upon him; he im
magines that scorpions sting him snakes
dart their tongues at him, and wind
their coils about him. Ah, he is in the
web of the spider, and she is stinging
him to death.
Remember, when you see these drink
ir.g-aioons, that they are cobweb saloon?;
boy-catcher man-catchers, from which
there is no escape. Advocate and Guar-
dian.
A Clevi:r Sell. A great French
patuntl historian one of the leading mem
bers of the Zoological Society cf. France,
was lately taking a towj-r ia Algeriajand
had occasion to call oa th? officer cotn-
mandirg the garriscnthere. Passirg
througll the yard, which being a barrack
was naturally crowded wiiV soldiers, his
attention wa3 called to two Zouaves,-who
were playing with an animal which to
the learned savan was a perfect novelty.
He stood and stared; it evidently be
longed to the group cf Rodentia, but tc
what class? It was neither the Mass
ratts, for it had no tail; nor the Arvic
la amphibious, for that certainly has no
proboscis like that which the astonished
professor saw'in the specimen before
him. He asked the Zouave, an "intel
ligent soldier," 23 he after wards obser-
o
ve
'What animal is that V
'Mcnsieur.'it is our trunked rat.
You find it here '
'In the neighborhood, bat very rarely.
The natives say that they are dying out,
andjthe breed will soon be lost.'
Ycu will sell that one perhaps"
'AL, monsieur, it belongs o us two.
Vh3t would you? It is cur little amuse
ment. Yuur poor soldier has but few;
still Jeaa and myself are poor and would
part with our little playfellow for four
hundred francs.'
The professor objected to the price
but finally agreed lo give one hundred
and fifty francs for the one rat, and four
hundred francs if in one week they could
get him a female cf the same race. He
was absent for a week,came back, got
his male and female rats, paid his four
hundred francs, chrisrened them the!
c!ass mus elerhus, wrote r. long papfr'en.
the discovery to a scientific body, posted j
his letter. Colonel f Zouares. wh-j hap- j
pentd o 'receive.' " j
Ashe tiered, ilt'c-: ioel was telling
a s'ory to the evident df ii-'n cf the ccr
pauy. Thf prcfessrr joined . circlt'.
'Yes,' said il cclcr.. vzy felloes ar.
ihf sharpest in iha u la-if a -.Wourl
Meiaieur lo pn -ftssrL try iSat"tw
," thrill Ia-j j'.T? "J two c.-iuiu'3 la s fr
' 'Mv osieur le C!oni is partly wrong,
partly right,' rep liestl.e pre 'tvr
tats,' yes ; common rats, ns ! 1 Ley. are
unique, and 1 ajn the h'-?I$ yurchaier.
Rears cf !trrghi?r f Hflwe'd this ronf es
soin, ani it wne out that th? Zvfj
had learned froiii tbe citive a dJg?
for making ; those carious creatures.
Ilfre ia the receipt. Cut thj tail c3"'a
rat, ct a slit in its ci?, stick the tail-
it is like' hud J bg a r.:e hi to ths kia
and plaster it up, ani ia a week it w:Il
grow there rsturally, less ex'remes
touchnt, and the rtrts elephes na
so is this story, as the profoisor knnur.
to his cost. He dare3 not go to hij so
ciety, for there is his 'trunked rat;' if
he goes down to his club, it is thre alo.
It will be his social death. He is already
known in Paris as 'ridicule mus.'
Old Governor 11-
has many
laughable stories told of him. I renum
ber seeing him once ia a state uf ixiad
usually called wrath. The circumstan
ces were a3 folle?,5 ;
The Governs, returning home frsma
tour to the northern part of the state, put
up for the night at a hotel in th flour
ishing and beautiful village of Princeton,
situated oa the Tox river. The next
morning, after arriving at hem?, he dis
covered that he had left his iru?:k at th '
t
hotel, twenty miles away. He ju3t then
saw one cf his neighbors going to Prince
ton, and ia Lis most pompous style re
quested Lim to "call at the hotel ani sa
if there was not a little trunk there be- .
longing to hiai."
"Yes, with, pleasure," replied the kind
and obliging neighbor. -.
When ready to return, he found his
wagon heavily loaded; the trunk povei
to be a large and wil . filled traveling
trunk, quite heavy, and it was quite cer
tain, on the principle of ar.tecedentprcb
abilities, that he would nev?r, get a c-t
for his trouble; ?so, seeing that it waa
safe at the hotel, he drove home. As he
approached the residence of the Gover
nor the latter went out ani opened the
gate, expecting the trunk woJ'd be ta
ken in and left at the door. The farm
er told h;m he was not. coming m. . c :
"Bit," say th gorernor.dii you r$t
get my. truak '' "
"No, ycu dii'c.t ' ask me to get iu"
"Did not ? What would yoa call it I
asked you?" Thundered ths exaspera
ted Governor. . : r :.. - .
Why, you ask i d mc tIook and see if
it was there. I did so. and ycu will find
it safe thre any day by just driving over
to Princeton. Good day."
- Suffice it to say, the Uovernar did not
asV that neighbor to do any mere er
rands for hn.
A man applied to Dr.. Jacksoa. the
celebrated cLemkt, with a box cf sp?ci
raear, filled wiih rpurklicg -aimllies-cf
gold dust. ..-. -! . ' ' -!
"Can you tell me. what this is, srr?'
"Certainly I can, sir, that is iroa. py-
rates." ... . ,
"What, sir?" ia a vcice cf thuLder.
"Iron pyrites." -"Iron
pyrites ! And what's tqt ? ;
t' That's what it i," said the chemist
putting a lot cn the ihcvel ever tha' hot
coals where it disappeared.. "Drj.'
'And what's iron pyrites worth; V :
'Nothing.' - . : i
'.Nothing! Why the i 'a a-'snMa
our town v.ho owns a'whIe hill of that
aud I'yf. rairried h-r.!''
It is esihattei thtt thers are three
hundred thousand refugees from the
South in the North. -
A young girl in aa English, village
tried to drown Lerieif ba.us.e her moth
er refused to hi her go-to a ea p a r '.-',
We are ender cbligationg to the. at
tentive messengers of the Adams Ex
press Company for favors thovn the - Of
fice. ' . ' - '. .--. ,'
A boy in London, was recen'ly fright
ened to death by a -Guy Faur." ; -;
A lot of srau .Tglers hive beea arrest
led in St. Loa.13. '
Gold is said to have b?en fijil "ar.-Jy
in small q'lntfttf irrar I) ... ntoi;, Yt.