Nebraska advertiser. (Brownville, Nemaha County, N.T. [Neb.]) 1856-1882, August 26, 1858, Image 1
a? y J v v - . 4 1 Ay Ay Ay Ay ft Ay DEV0TK1) TO ART, SCIENCE, AGRICULTURE, COMMERCE, NEWS, POLITICS, GENERAL INTELLIGENCE AND THE INTERESTS OF NEBRASKA. vol. nr. CITY OF BliOWNVILLE, NEMAHA COUNTY, N. T., THURSDAY, AUGUST 26, 1858. NO. 9. VtV If r Ihrip Ay Nebraska SVDucrliscr t, VI Kl.l-liKI- EVERY TIM RSPAY BT R. W. FURNAS, t ' Second St.ry lloadh-y k Muir's Building, t (Corn, r ff Main and First .-treats.) UllOWNVI I.I.I'm N-T- f i.nid m u.lv Jt"-' - 12 CuIh ..f 12 .r m-re iV. he fun.M.cl at ,kt -.num. provide 1 tlo cah ao-owpames the truer, E--.I ether iw. KATES OF ADVEUTISINO: n8'iff;H iirorlessno insertion, I Mh additional iasertioa, i,;0 2.oi) 4,(i.i f,,IM Ir.a siuaf-f. one ui uiu, three mouth?, " i " pix in inlli-, i "i one year, Tnw cr.l of fix line or lc?s one year, UocOolnmn on year, Os-half Column, ..lie year, f,.urth " - righto " . Cimnn. six nviith. half Column, six month?, fourth " J-."" ' i .no :;.'.ii( 20.IHI 1 .-..no 20.IM1 10.no 8.tn Co.oo l-"..no 10,00 t'.co i ,ri.iO rt i.-e- i ti,ftith C .lutnn thr? nv th. in .Tith- - o l.Vf Column. t!ir fourtb " eighth " Anti'iun , -mild''" Ir 'i. '? m iwvr.- 4.'h in ,.lv ltjfn will If r-5 imre l ; r a. . a n mentaex.-ep !.... ..iiia ri--i.o!'liii.n V iskii n. Ten per i nt for eai-li.-tiaa,;-; will l.e julied tome ah'.ve rates. No a'Jrer;i"-m"nt wi'.Ui" "..nsi l mips. i- ifn-.l m the tinn ts.-ri red by the yer.r. t, or previously ?reej ui.H. t."tweetl the ,,:ir!l.-. A-lverti-rtui nt- not in irk-1 . n tne'-py f ,r s-per-ifie.i nura'.cr..f in--niotis. will i... .-..utinueil until ril.-re.l ..ut.anl rlmri'd :i.ir.liny . AlUiU-erii-ta-iiistr ,:n -tr.m-crs., transient t-r-on.to HeiaiJ in aJnu.c . . The ,,rivil-- of yesrly a.lver'iri willbp ennfin- ...I I t.fth .-r .wi;"t.usii s;:,n l lU a lvrrtise- ntTliol irt.ii!iing thereto, to he pai f..r ex- tra. . Vcarlv a lv-rtis.-ri Inve th privih :e of L-'a: tkeir .ivertienient .iuart-ny. Ail l.jii.k"l lvrtiem,-iit charged .lotihlc the lb ivc rat.w. , . , -,, , A Uer'is -m-nl; on the insiJa exelusivjiy will bo tkajr"'! extra. BOOKAND FANCY JOli PRINTING! Having abided to tho Job 1'res.es. New Tvpe Advertiser Ofiiec Card and of T tie latest styles. Inks of I'.iper, Envelop", &e. : we ite .l..h Work of evtrv de- ail - il ires. Hroii7.-s, Ktn are now pr. i;.re.l to ee rp'ion in a s'y'.e r.n-u i'd hy any other ofiiv-e IB tlie l'iiit-.l Slates. I'.ir'.ieul.ir at; -n: ion will heaven to orders from Adi-Utii-- in !i iviie' thei.i promptly attended to. The l'r..:r: .r-, hiving had all etM,ive expe rifin'c, will ie their t- :i:il ait.ji.lion to this bran.h c.f l.u in. --. a nd h p ,:.n their ei..leav..rs to phtasc, l.oth in the e -c.l. nee of th -ir work, and re.isoiiaMo i-Larjes tu reeeive a share of the puhlie 11 U S I X ESS C A It 1) S . 3IISS MAltY TUUNl'.n, Milliner and dress maker, Main Street, one door above C;v; cns EcLk. llUOWNVIIJ.i:, X. T. Bonnets anil Trimmings nla'ays n fiawl. TJ. C. JOHNSON, .ATTORNEY AT LAW, SOLICITOR IX CHANCERY AN h Real INtate Ajrcnt, BROWN VILLI', X. T. KEFEKENCKS. .Tessut., Mot.trosc, Ta. Hon. Win R. S. l'.entlv. .Mm C. Miller. Chi--a-., 111. Wm. K. McAllister, Charles F. Fowler. " " R. W. Furnas, Krownvil'.e, N. T. O. F. Lake, ' Mar 7, ISoT. 47-ly J. 1IAKT & SOX, MM-k A3 i Oregon, Holt County, Missouri. Kereonstantlvonhandali Ieseriptiou. fllaracss. Saddles Rridles. Ac. Ac . N. R. Ever.vartieleinourshopism imifacturcd jiy ourselves.atid warranted to give.at i.-faetien. E. S. DUNDY, ATTORNEY AT LAW7, AKC11FR, RUIIARPSON CO. N. T. Til l, i - v'1 v in tlie i-eeer.il Courts f ti e 2.1 Judicial rT.Mr;ct, attJ a'toti.i i ..i:l ira"ers tonne-le t wiili tie JrofesMou. V. M I.i.nnak. .Ksq . of Nehriik,t City, viti ":-t top in t'.ie pr,.e. nuon of importai.t Sails. Sept. io, "st-ii-tr MVEk PEVNFT. M. B. ARR1T. J IMF P. rtSKE. AtulSTrS KXUtHT. OLIVER BENNETT & CO., Manufacturer? and Whalcsale PcalerMn BOOTS AND SHOES. ' No. 87 Main Street. (Fomrlt,No.101,Corsrof Mais asdLoccst.) ST. LOCIS, MO. ' C. V7. WHEELER, Architect and Builder. Brownxrillo, Ttf. 1. A. D KIRK, I 4 4 c i f' i i i HARNESS : 'e.. A. 7. ''' . . NEMAHA LAND AGENT, Sl'RYEYOR & A OTA 11 V ri'IILIC, Will select a;ns, investigate titles, piy taxes. &c, either m Kansas r Nelirnka; buy. sell, ani enter i:ni ii cviiitnis Mi,; nr. ft in town property, buy r ril ti e mine. r.. will always li ive tti h.mi correct plats I townships, count ips. Ate. show hir all lamls sublet-: to entry, ;,n.l wlirre loired will fumili jjurties Uv iiil" in the -.liitp-i with tle .Hine ltemu the olil-t settler m tliprm:ity will iu all ( ,ic- in' jU;r hi l-ic tun ana rcn.i,.,i mivnium AMr'- A. I.. (.'.te, eitlier at Brownvi. le or Netnah fiiy. Nc-t.ra-lia Territ..ry. 6m-1-.'--2 DANIEL L. McGARY, ATTORNEY AT LAW. AND SOLICITOR IX CIUXCERY. Urownvillp, Nt-Lra.-ka. Will pracMoc ia tlie Courts vt Xeiirska,ainl Xortli west Xi-v REFERENCES. j'p.rs. Cri.w. SI.Xroary & Co 11 .li. J .line M . H'l-tis, 11..:, J tin K. Sl.ei'iy, II. .n. J line- 'u:. St. I.nni. Mo. Do Do St. Joseph, Mo. Do Nebraska City, K. T. Do 11. in. S in i.il.-n. JnOt-e A . A . Hra.lt. .rJ, S. I'. Xnik.iils. K-., J. D.N.&B. B.THOAIPSON i Ileal Estaiefc (Jeneral (ol!ecling Agents, BROWIJ'VILI.E, N. T. I Ascnis for Iowa Ins. ro.0skaloosa, i A I.I. I.n-inesi ei.: ni-iei! to .n;r e.ire will meet wiih pri.iiipt atifii'i.'ii .ii. 0 w arr3iitel "orrei f Paperi prepar jelf .r jrrM.iis wi-hi:is to prc-cmp;, Declaratory slate i meiit - m.i'ie w t. e..., etc. i it!K e on Tirst street, north -fl. T. WfcirtC & Co C3 KF.FKKRENTns : J. W. (".rimes, Y.x-i ..vein .r I hj T. I.. P.i. e do ili-situl Ansii:i A Kinc do do ;. s. Eayte s. Co., Oieiiwii-Hi. l-wa (J D.iiikIi'j- CjUIiciI HhiDs, -Ap' s lVrt. viiJl-1y H. M. ATKINSON, Surveyor and Land Aprcnt, EAXN" STREET, BUUW NVILLi:, N. T., Will attend promptly to the selection nrid k?n- tivtl .1' .'..vriu'.Urlil lilll'lS lu lliv Nclll.llll lan'lilis- tri'-: surveying toii-ites, at). I stl.lu iJin' laiids; drafting eity pi it., and all other liusine.-i of udener al Surveyor. He w ill liwate variants on time for distant denUrs: file d e,iratory statetenients of in tention to pre-empt : make out pre-eut) tion paiers: and always m hand to lookout claims for actual set tlers. REFER TO V. W. Smcrer. M. 1., S'w:il .V Withinton, Kev. T. W. Howe, New Vorli City, Roston, Mass. Pataska'.a Ohio, Col. W. K. Atkinson. ;eore H.Nixi u. Register Lan 1 OfTi -e. Rrownville, l.u-lil'.niirh it Carson, ltaiikers, Urownville, N. T. R. W. Furnas " " W. ITF.TT. PUETT M. a. WILKINSON. & WILKINSON, seats A N T ATTORNEYS AT LAW, OMADI, N. T. Will attend to all httjt;es? entmsted to their earo RKFKKEM'ES Col. Jeaso Williams, Fairfield, lo-wa. (5..V. Jos. A. Wright, Indiar.apoiis, Ind, Mr. F. N. l; .k, aslnnston City, lion. John tl. Ihtvis, lim-kville, Ind. llou. Geo. !.. M:'ier, Diii.iha City, N. T. JAMES W. GIBSON, BLACKSMITH Second Street. between Main and Nehra-ka, r.nowxviLLi:, x. t. . K. E. 1IARIMV.;. C. KlUr.'iVolI K. F. TOOMER. HARDING, KiMBQUGH & GO,, Jf.twfiirti'nrfi-.t'l tn-of.W. . ah r t HATS. CAPS & STRAW7 GOODS. Ko 49 Mam street, bet. Olive and Pine, LUC IS. .V(. Particular attention pai l to manufacturing cur finest Mole Hats. REAL ESTATE AGENCY. iEjKuE Ct.AVES. J. V. I.EE. Cloycs t- Hioo. Real Estate and General Agency, OMAHA CITY. N. T. REFER TO Jamce Wright, liroker, New York, Wm. A. Woodwcrd. Esq. " Hon. K. Wood, Ex-Im-v. of Ohio, Cleveland, Wieks.Otie and i;rovnell,liankcrs, ' Al-ott Horton, ,' Col.K iliert Camphell, Ft. Loui?, James Kidway, Esq. " ' Crawf...m and S.ukett, Chicago. Omaha City, Aug.r0,lS5S. v1nl"-1y T . E .11 A YCOOK. Attrney at Law REAL ESTATE AGENT. Mount Vernon, rmaha Co., Vat: ictilar attention i. ii.l to 0 e rr:irt ice of hw au.'.col- i,M.,.n of iIpI.i- m the c- nnt;. s em ilia, Pawnoe, i Solins.iii. an.l Kieliard-n. Nel.. aK i Territory. Re.il date lionl.t .i ; o 1 s .1 1 1 1 . i .i ui i --i. .ti . I.ana warrants l.K.ite.l for .r.it le.ilrrs. Pre-emption paper e,ret'.i:'.v j.-on.irc.l. liri tus to S.im.H. F.il.ert, Poitisinotiei. N. T. 11 1 Keiinet. Net' .i-k i eity N T o I Kuli.ir.ison. Om.ilia niy. X T Kenner rVrj-'u-.n. Ml'. Pellevue. XI ( af-i-aov At Test. Bankers. Council liiiul', Iowa Co. k. sc'i;o.uit is. 1'j.ik, t'ort Desnn n.e.-. I. Perouilier 3. 1S57 i.2:ily JEEKEKSliX I CAS.VPY, ) MARTIN W. KI1ES.) JAS. P. TEST, JAS. P. WHITE. ConneilP.lufTs.lowa. ) Nehraska City NT) CASSADY, TEST, KIDEN & CO., (Successors to KiJen White.) LAND AGENTS. NEBRASKA CITY, Hi receive accurate copies of ad the lownsjips ernhraeed in the Eastern port ioa of Nehraska, we are now prparcd to offer our service" to the " Squatters of braska Territory." In Filling Declaratory Statements of Inten tion to Pre-empt. Secnrine; Pre-emptions, Locating Land Warrants- AND ENTERING LAND. Land lVarranls llnu&ilit and Sold. LAND ENTERED ON TIME. Particu'ar attention paid to Buying and Selling Property on eomniisfion: Alo, to making Collections and forwarding remittances t anv p-irt if the Union. IVanVi' f r.V Kinds n'wiv ' K'TEUEM' hnnd. :l i. . V.l.M.lf- r-i. Ne'T k.. Ci: We t. M. W:. c u Miscellaneous. A Wife's Dorcer. BY A RETIRED ATTORNEY. Everybody who know John Gordon kn?w hun to be one of the meanest and mo?t contcinruiLle men that ever was per mitted to walk "the earth. His brother Peter was not a whit better so that it would appear that meanness ran in the blood of the family. John was pretty well off, so far as this world's goods were concerned. His pro perty was all invested in a building which had cost him about thirty thousand dollars. He did not marry until he was forty probably from the fear of incurring un necessary expense, and when finally he did take a wife, it was only as he would have taken hitn a housekeeper, a ser vant. Mrs. Gordon was a poor woman, and had been obliged to work very hard for a living. Probably she married oi purely prudential considerations, for she could not possibly have loved such an abortion of a man as John Gordon. She took a good care of her husband, treated him beuer than he deserved, and was in every respect an obedient and faithful wife. All she received in return was the meager support which her husband's house afford ed her. When they had been married some three years John was taken sick, and iingercd along fur a year, during which tim ? his wife was an excellent and devot ed nurse. Her whole aim seemed to be to discharge her duties to her lord with fidelity. She had made a bargain with him, and .-he performed her part of the contract with scrupulous exactness. One day I heard that John Gordon was dead. It was a small loss to the commu nity, and I could not think of pitying his wife, for her lot would certainly be ame liorated by his departure. She would be entitled to one-third of the income of his real-estate, which for a poor woman, as Aiv had been, and having no luxurious taste to gratify, would be a princely sti penl. I never thought nor heard any more of John Gordon or his wife for two months, when a woman appeared. at my office, and introduced herself as the latter. I mo i-; n ivrv bn.i rasp Mr TWL-Pt ' i said she, seating herself by my side. 'Indeed,' madame, I thought you were very comfortably provided for. You have one third of the income of your husband's estate, or about a thousand dollars a year.' 'ltseems I am not replied gloomily. to have this,' she 'Not to have it?' 'Teter Gordon has taken possession of the estate, declaring it belongs to him. lie says my husband sold it to him a few weeks before he died.' 'How could that be ?' I tor sVi.v.v.mI ir,r tbo deed, mid snv? it has be refolded.' " 'Does he ? So much the better for you madame. The law gives you one half of is P'-isoual fiat 'But he M.'ld it fur one dollar,' iiiter rupled Mrs.' Ge.rdon. 'Hi cuiili.i t sell without your concur reu .e. Did you release l.HVlM- 1 1 tVlf t .I"!' II! 1 S.' " your ri t to 'No, sir ; l'eter says I did, though; and shows me my name, duly witnessed, on the d-.-d.' 'Didn't you si rn it 2' 'No sir.' 'Then it is a for rery. 'I suppose it is.' 'You are confident you did not sign your name to the deed ?' 'I am sure I did not, and for a very good reason.' 'How's that ?' 'I cannot write; I never even wrote my name. I was brought up in the country, ! where girls did not tret so much schooling as now. My folks were very poor, and I never had a chance to go to school,' re plied Mrs. Gordon, with some confu si. n. i ' Did your husband know that yo could not write.' '.:o, 1 never told him. I dismissed her with the request that she would call next day. I went at once to the Registry of Deeds, and found that Mrs. Gordon had told a straight story. ! Her miserable, contemptible hu?bandhad given his property to his brother in his last days, so as to cheat his wife; who had cared for him in health and nursed him in sickness, out of her just claim upon his estate ! He was a villain! I need not say I felt a deep interest in the cause of my client, and resolved to bring matters to an issue at once. Ihe next day, when she called, Kho ii;rort.l t.. luV sUtpr. bv whom rm-.U ho r.rnv.'d thr.t Airs. Gordon could not write her name; who had seen her make-her mark often, within a very short The person who professed to have wit- i nessod tho sifnattire of Mrs. Gordon wns! a clerk in the office of Teter. My first move was to take steps to arrest him on a charge of fraud, aud to sue his employer ! lor my client s share or the rents, which he had just collected, and which he had refused to pay over to her. hen I had proceeded thus far, 1 rec- eived a visit from Peter Gordon ' v i.at d ) you ia u, sii a-K cd ra'h- r i-o irly. '1 m-a"i o ze- i.i lice f. the widow. II- I :. rl i i.-Va ia v.-.; , wi r'.u no-iuii when JJut his wife has one-third interest in his real estate.' It was sold me, and she signed away her right to dower.' Did she V 'Certainly she did.' 'Did you see her sign?' 'To be sure I did; so did my clerk.' 'There is a warrant out for the arrest of your clerk; and I have some hopes that Lc will luiu State's oviJcnoc, and oonviot the principal.' He started back with astonishment and terror. I I don't understand you !' he stam mered out. 'Don't trouble yourself about it, Mr. Gordon, you will understand it all in due time. For God's sake, don't arrest my clerk. He will be the ruin of me,' groaned he. 'You should have thought of that be fore,' I said. You don't mean to say that everything isn't all ri:rht about my brother's affairs ? Because, if it isn't, I will make it right, you know,' he whined in supplicating tones. 'You say you saw Mrs. Gordon sign the deed?' Well no; not exactly; but I supposed she signed it.' 'You don't know she didn't?' 'How should I know?' 'She can't write! She never even wrote her name in her life !' I pressed the rascal closely and made him acknowledge that his clerk had sign ed the name for a consideration. I would have caused both of them to be sent to the State Prison, if Mrs. Gordon had not beerged me to spare them. As it .was, I secured the entire income of the estate for my client, and charged my bill to Pe ter who was but too glad to pay it. Marshall Xey's Death-Scene. The vengeance of the Allied Powers demands some victims; and the intrepid Ney who had well nigh put the crown again on Bonaparte's head at Waterloo, was to be one of them. Condemned to be shot, he was led to the Garden of Lu xemburg on the morning of the 7th of December, and placed in front of a file ! of soldiers drawn up to kill him. One of j the officers stepped up to bandage his I eves, but he stopped him, saying: "Are you ignorant that for twenty-five years I have been accustomed to face both ball and bullet?" He then lifted his hat above his head, and with the same calm voice that had steaded his columns so fre quently in the roar and tumult of battle, said: "I declare before God and man that I never betrayed my country may my death render her happj'. Eire la France ' Ho then turned to the sol diers, and, striking his hands on his heart gave the order, "Soldiers, fire !" A sim ultaneous discharge followed, and the "bravest of the brave" sank to rise no more. He who had fought five hundred battles for France, not one against her, i was snot as a traitor ! As 1 looked on j the spot where he fell, I could not but j sigh over his fate. True, he broke his i oath of allegiance, so did others, carried away by his attachment to Napoleon, and the enthusiasm that hailed his approach to Pctris; still he was no traitor. General Arnold. During the traitor Arnold's predatory operations in Virginia, in 17S1, he took an American captain prisoner. After some general conversation, he asked the captain, "What he thought the Ameri cans would do with him if they caught him ?" The captain at first declined giv ing an answer; but upon being repeated ly urged, he said, 'Why, ir, if I must answer the question, you will excuse my telling you the truth; if my countrymen should catch you, I believe they would first cut off j-our lame leg, which was wounded in the cause of freedom and virtue at Quebec, and bury it with the honors of war, and afterwards hang the remainder of your body upon a gibbet. Man. AVc lce tha following rich morsel from one of-Dow Jr.'a short patent sermons: Man looks upon life just as he looks upon woman there is no living with them, and he can't live without them. He will run after them, and rather than be held he will lose his coat tail and char acter kiss for love, and kiss them for leading him into trouble. So with life. He partakes of its pleasures, and then curses it for its pains; gatherr boquets of bliss, and when their blossoms have fad ed he finds himself in possession of a bunch of briers, which is all owing to a little incident that occurred in Paradise, when man was as green as a tobacco worm, and as unsuspicious as a tree toad it a thunder storm. He was told to m- ' crease, and so accordingly increased his , cares- aml peopled the world with a lot of j candidates for perdition, and I am one cf 'You are very stupid, Thomas,' said a - 1 .... j country school-teacher to a little boy eight j years old. You are like a donkey, and I what do they do to cure him of his stupx- ditv?' Why, they feed him more and kick him less, said the urchin. A witness in a askt d how lie kr.r', Hoosier court being -.ha: two c- fiam pcr- sins were man Whv, d-'J Oil an.i w it, I'v. ropiiee: ani ihun scoly- i iag each, cthtr more a any tum.-s. ' Ti.j rrovf wai held aj conclusive. Will There be Flowers in Heaven. .Mamma? Brightly the sun of a clear, cold De cember day shed its slant rays through the half-closed blinds of a sich room, glowing upon the rosy curtains, and play ing in fantastic shape upon the carpet, but brought no gladness to the sorrowing lieartsof the mourners there. A mother sat with bowed head and breaking heart by the bedside of her daFling first born son ; and that dark-eyed little girl moved slowly about the room gazing thoughtfully for a while into the bright fire, then kiss ing the pale cheek of her brother, and wondering 'how long he would sleep.' For hours he had laid with closed eyes and white lips, and a breath so short and low that it scarcely stirred the white co ver. The fever had left him, but nature was exhausted, and they told us that our Charlie must die. Sunlight faded, and in the gray twi light we sat watching the little one pass ing so gently from our circle. At last the eyes slowly opened, and a soft voice spoke the sweet words: Mother, how long till summer time ?' 'Six months, my darling.' Then your Charlie will not see the flowers again. Don't cry, mamma, I must go pretty soon, but I wish I could see the flowers once more. Will there be any in heaven? Kiss me, mamma, cou sin Amy, good night; sweet sleep,' and j wm.nasiiu me angeis. e men crosscu ins wnue nanas over nis still hrart, and smoothed back the cold en cuns irom nis tempies, ana mere laid our faded lilly upon the stainless snow. Our boy was to frail and fair for heart, and God has taken him to a holier cliine. Yes, there are flowers in heaven, sweet child: such flowers as thou. Their petals cannot bear our wintry winds, so angels gather them, and they go to bloom in l r i . i i.i i"i iaueiess beauty in Father in heaven. i i i the garden of our Wanted a Live Woman. Punch thus expresses his distress at the disappearance of women from the face of the earth: There are no woman now-a-days. In stead of women, we have towering edi fices of silk, lace and flowers. You see a milliner's advertizing van that slides along with a rustling sound, and you are told it is a woman; but as you cannot ap proach within several yards of the monster obstruction, you cannot tell what it is, be yond something that looks like a shop front put into a motion with all the goods in it exposed for sale. I really believe if any showman would open an exhibition where one could see a woman such as women were in my younger days, when they used to be fair, slender, graceful, well proportioned and every thing that was beautiful; instead of the animated wardrobes, and unrecognizable bundles of ; fine clothes, that they now are I really j believe that an enterprising showman like that would rapidly realize a la fortune. i-p-n Brine; out your Pound Cake, Amoii2 the company of a great five- dollar ball given in New Orleans, last spring, in honor of some public event, was a rrreen 'un from the country, who had never before seen anything of the kind, upon so grand a scale, and was to tally at a loss to understand the ridicul ous, new-fangled dances which prevailed. Paying an enormous price for a ticket, and having been fasting some time in an ticipation of the supper, his whole tho'ts were directed to the enjoyment in that line in store fcr him, He strode up and down the saloon with his hands thrust in to his pantaloons pockets, accosting every waiter he encountered, with 'Boy, look here, is supper most ready?' At last supper was announced, and in rushed our hero, in advance of everybody, and seating himself about the centre of the table, began to beckon every waiter whose eye he could catch, but no one, much to his indignation, approached him until after the ladies had been seated and served, when he was asked whether he would take some ham. 'itfi ' exclaimed be, v Ilh most pro found astonishment, 'do you 'spose, sirrah, can eat five uoh.irs worth of ham I Erin v.s sonuZof your pound cake and sich like.'' To Prevent Flies from Teasing Horses- The following receipe I have used for several seasons, and I have proved its ef ficacy. As the season of flies is near at hand, it may be useful to your readers. Take two or thee smail handful of wal nut leaves, upon which pour two or three quarts of soft cold water; let it infuse one night and pour the whole next morning into a kettle, and let it boil for a quarter of an hour. When cold it will be fit for use. No more is required than to mois ten a spunge; and before the horse goes out of the stable, let those parts which are the most irritable be smeared over with the liquor, viz: between and upon the ears, the neck, the flank, Sec. Not only the lady or gentleman who rides out for pleasure will derive a benefit from the leaves thus prepared, but the coachman, the wagoner, and all others who use hor- j ses, during the hot months. Prairie Farmer. The raitn-.n breast. saint clothes himself in a coarse ani hides precious gems iu his raore p- lLhs' i is the socie! Squibs. It is better to be struck with than a poker. an idea Debt is the art of ney. liring nthout rao- It is better to be smitten by a young lady than by rheumatism. Ex. That depends upon whether you would rather have the disease located in the heart than iflThe legs.' If a person is continually complaining of the town he lives in, -it only proves that he is not fix to live in it himself. It requires an early start now-a-days for a man to get round his wife. It is a mistake to suppose every man you see with a brick in his hat is a ma son. Mrs. Ellis says a lady can show anger as well by her back in leaving a room as by her face. This must be when she gets her back up.' Wanted A thin man who is used to the business of collecting, to crawl thro'h key holes and find debtors who are never at home. Salary, nothing the first year, to be doubled every year after. One of the editors of the Boston Post ii i says: ve nave enioyea tne wonu as much as others, but have never been hap pier than when a boy we found a par- tridge's nest with eleven eggs ia it. Mr. President, said a member of a school committee, I rise to get up, and am not backward in. coming forward in the cause of edication. Had it not been for edication I should have been as ignor ant as yourself, Mr. President. May is considered an unfortunate month for marrying. A down east edi tor says a girl was asked not long since to unite herself in May in his proposals. The lady tenderly intimated that May was unlucky month for marrying. 'Well, make it June, then,' honestly replied the swain, anxious to accommodate. The damsel, paused a moment, hesitated, cast down her eyes, and said with a blush, 'wouldn't April do as well ?' A gentleman who did not trust to his memory, wrote in his memorandum book 'must be married w hen I get married!' The nerve which never relaxes, the eye which never blanches, the thought that never wanders these are the mas ters of victory. A French writer has said : 'To dream gloriously, you must act gloriously while you are awake; and to bring angels down to hold converse with you in your sleep, you must labor in the cause of virtue du ring the day.' A bear has always been reckoned a formidable animal a gay seducer who hugs his victim to death, in the most af fectionate but painful manner. Eut the most terrible specimen of a bear we ever heard tell of, is the one we hear tell of in the following which we clip from an exchange : There was a jolly woodman A stanuin by a tree. When he spied an awful big bear A coming right at he. The bear was ramparageous The foam was on his lip, And full a yard of land, He cleared at every step. Innocence is a flower which withers when touched, but blooms not again, tho' watered with tears. The mind has more room in it than most people think, if they would furnish the apartments. A pert young lawyer once boasted to an old member cf the bar, that he had rec eived two hundred dollars for speaking in a certain cause. 'I received double that sum for holding my tongue,' was reply. r',,- 'Jury, said an Ark Kansas J'" e, 'you may go out and find a verdict, it you can't find one of your own, cret the one the last uiry used. Ihev returned a verdict of suicide in the ninth degree. A dull day being in love, , and an empty, pocket, and aifects a man's spirits most seriously. A lawyer in the interior of Maine re cently declined paying his merchant for his bill of goods on the ground that the merchant might suspend and keep the money out of circulation. Never assist in circulating a slander by repeating it, as by such means it lives. It is better to sow a young heart with generous thoughts and deeds, than a field of corn, since the heart's harvest is per petual. Trees with double flowers are too often the emblem of friendship there is plen ty of blossoms, but no fruit. Don't you like back gammon ?' said Indvnnn stpir.hnnt tn -x Hi.r '1 don't know; 1 never ate any, was the reply. An editor out West says he don's think Columbus deserves any credit for discov ering America, for he couldn't have wdl missc-J it. I i uncii sa , s that in th ?ha .f - smaii waift i.tav V- A Sensible Girl. As a weary traveler was wending Lis way through the mud out in the far west, he discovered a young maiden standing in the door of a small log-house, and ask ed the maiden for a drink of water ; he drank it, and she being the first woman he had seen for several days, olfercd her a dime for a kiss. The . . w vounr j o ir. a ul en accepted and received both the dime swd the kiss. The traveler was vbout to re sume his journey, but the maiden never before having seen a dime, asked : 'What am I to do with the dime V 'You use it ia any way you wish,' ha replied, 'it is yours.' This being the case,' said she, 'EH ive you back the dime, and take another kiss.' The traveler wilted. Enthusiasm. Wilson and Phinney are leading mem bers of the Washington county bar. Sit ting opposite one another at the dinner table they are always opposite at th bar in the Court-house, and agreed as to the bar in the hotel Wilson was descri bing the effects of a speech he made a few days before at a great political meet ing in the village where Phinney re sides. "Indeed,' said he, 'I never saw the peo ple so filled with enthusiasm!' 'Filled wiih what ?' cried Phinney. With enthusiasm,' repeated Wilson. 'Oh ah ! said Phinney, 'I understand, but I never heard it called by that nam before; we call it rum ! ' ) i A woman in Indiana was lately granted a divorce on the complaint that her hus band always "laid with his back to her.' A cotemporary says: 'There is a man up in our country who always pays for hia paper in advance. lie has never had a sick day in his life; never had any corns or toothache; his potatoes never rot; the weevil never eats his wheat; the frost never kills his corn and beans; his babies never cry in the night; and his wife never scolds, and always wears the moderate sized hoops.' Reader, if you.would realize like re sults on your own part, ro thou and da likewise. One of the finest writers says that 'tho nightly dews come down upon us like, blessings.' How very differently tho daily dues comedown upon us in these hard times. Every rose has its thorn. I never helped to shawl the flower of a ball-room without being convinced by painful evi dence, that she had a pin about her. Vegetation is so scarce at Cape Cod, Mass., that two mullen stalks and a huckleberry-bush are called a grove. Punch saj-s he once saw a father knockdown his beloved son, and thought it was the most striking illustration of sua down he ever beheld. 'There's a great pressure in the money market,' as the rat said when a Lag of specie fell en him. A duel was fought in Mississippi last A. was month, by Mr. T. Knott and Mr. Shott. The result was that Knott shot, and Schott was not. Sin has many tools, but a lie is a haa-. die which fits them all. Modesty, says a cotemporary, adorns a woman, but ruins a man. Oregon must be a very moist country. A letter from there says 'it rains "6 hours in the day for 17 mouths in the year. A shower commenced on the 3d of las: November and continued until the 19th of March, when it set in for a long storm, which is not ended yet.' Chcvreau, in his history of the World, informs us that it was created on the 6th of September, on a Friday, a little after ; 1 o'clock in the afternc Dr; Marsh says the best cure for hys-. t cries 3 to discharge the servant girl. Iu his opinion there is nothing like 'flying around" to k-cp the nervous system from becoming unstrung. Some women think they want a physician when they only need the scrubbing brush. During the search instituted by the edi tor of the Nc-wark Times for female com positors, it is reported the following dial ogue took place : Briiter Good morning, Mr. Henpeck. Have you got any daughters that would mcke good type-setters ? Henpeck. No, but I've got a wife that would make a gocd "devil." The grudge with which most men part with the' noblest purposes for a little pit tance, is astonishing and humiliating. Mammon, mammon, is the god of the professing world amcr.rr us. The love cf distinction flows in the channels of wealth and thus creates an aristocracy the most feeble and enfeebiing, the most corrupt and corrupting, the most slavish and en slaving cf all aristocracies the aristo- a I cra(T ot dollars. Hence the passion lor i lucre is the passion of the the United States. Men measure their respectability not ly their deeds of goodness, but by the sums of which they are masters. A modern writer says 'It may seems strange, I tit it is a fact, that men gener- , ai .y ar-. a th' . Il:r're '"' I;: i rra d f En. . m ?i than ic-m:riii : f.,r i'i 1 1(J . :- ty u.re s ;ii it. UiM I4AW UiMt'w I. a.