Nebraska advertiser. (Brownville, Nemaha County, N.T. [Neb.]) 1856-1882, October 29, 1857, Image 1
V ...... j J: & fV , m r r-v : : ji. .11' ' . I. : Ay - I -t - if DEMOTED TO ART, SCIENCE, AGRICULTURE, COMMERCE, INEWS,"" POLITICS, INTELLIGENCE ANT THE INTERESTS OF- NEBRASKA. VOL. II. CITY OF BROWNVILLE, NEMAHi. COUNT N. T.; THURSDAY, OCTOBER. 29, 1857. ISO. 18. 6 . ""'V ' . OJ j k ' ! - GENERAL i IPITW AND rCBLISnED EVXST THTRSDAT BT " ?JIINAS & LANGDON, ' coid Street, bet. Kala and Water, (LaVe'e Block,) . BROWNVILLE, N. T. Tonejeaiif io aiivucef - $2,00 at the cud of fl month, 2.50 s - a u u u u 12 3,00 .'jV.'t f Ur nnre will be furni.sbel at $1,50 per in jrjvi.leJ tLe cash accumfanies the order, - ji a l -f HATLS UK ADVLRTI.SING: $1,00 0,50 2,50 4,00 6.00 ' 10,00 5,0 60.00 . 35,00 18,00 10,00 35,00 20.00 . 10,00 - - 8.00 . 20,00 13,00 10,00 j h 4.1 li:ki:i-tl insertion, , i t!ir-2 ia )aths, ; . six month, I " .' one yjax, i h;s TarJs of ix lines or less one year, t'CiLfni. one je ir, " e-Lif iCjtninn, une jear, fourth " " fc C'-UImn, six month. k halfj Cvluion, sir months, fourth Virth w CjiifttB, three month, bif! ("oiuinn, three months, f.olA " i;1-!;n'jirT,arJ.nt iorctuc maaran.j o,uu .' iu aivcr.ee rill be required for all adrertise- j k"ejt rt ljfjre actciil n?ionsililitj is known. , n'f'. r cent for each -'change be added to the -V.iii i'.arincts Card5of five lines or less, for ; .v. .ti!'.-e-l:f',n,,ri,s iriil be foii-iTed by the year, t. i . .- I a te. tuu.axcript, r previously : .(i '. 't '..!! the (ia.rUo?. V5 e IL'ML't marked on thekojty Tor a .peci Tn'i .T l:i-'rti'n; win be continued until or Kfl.'.at, xnl -h ir jd .-u-cordiny. A'i i !r -rt ; - M-ii'tit from strangers or transient per .;. to be Tid in advance. ". . 7:i'jriviiireof yehrly advertisers will b confined ; r titt:i"ir wn business : and all advertisementf i tertiiinin thereto, to be paid for extra. Tearly dvertiers lave the privilege of changing t'.r Iwiisementji ouarterly, . , All : ai1! J advertisements charged double the above tii'-". -.Vb-rti-ment8on the inside exclusirely will be tiiftd eitra. !. BOOK AND FANCY JOB PRINTING! -Ci .... m ' r oa ; laving added to the Advertiser Otbco Card and i JoU'resses. New Types of the latest styles, Inks of ; !l.lor9, Rronie?, Fine Paper, Envelopes, 4c.; we i arwow prepared to execute Job Work of every de Ssrhtita iu Style unsurpassed by any other office ! in tie United Stiites. ' Particular attention will be given to orders from a . dis'tneo in having them promptly attended to. 5 T!:e Propri ;tors, who, having had an extensive ex ' p rienco, will give the r personal attention to this ! branch t buinas?,ani hope, in their endeavors tn : j.'.easp, otb in the ex?ellenc9 t-f their work, and reas. ma charges, to receive a share of the public I'atronape. BUSINESS' -CARDS. miowN-v.ir.LE. A. S. HO LX AD AY, M. D. SURGEON, PHYSICIAN , And Obstotrlclaii. LUOW.WlLLE, N. Tr; . '''lt a .h"e 'f rue ratronage, in the variou! "''r I'rofe.v.ion.fromthecitizensof Brown . "e and vicinity. MISS MARY TURNER, a 1 firit Street, between Main and Water, BUOWNVILLE, N. T. Kmnets and Irimmingt always on hand C.-W. WHEELER, ICH1TEGT AND BUILDER. i JAMES W. GIBSON, BLACKSMITH Second Su-eet, between Main and Nebraska, BUOWNVILLE, N. T. ; l- 4. BKAUFORD, ' , . KCLENXAV, Xbrka Citv.N.T. . L. MC'OART, Brownville,N.T. ; BRADFORD, McLENNAN k McGARY, iSTfOlEYS AT W ? AND j SOLICITORS LN CHANCERS. I BroTrnville and Nebraska City NE3RASKA TERRITORY. DETXG permanently located in the Territory, we : J- will give our entire time and attention to the j Police of our profession, in all its branches. Mat 1 in Litigation, Collecfioni of Debts, Sales and . purchases of Read Estate, Selections of Lands, Lca- i oi Land Warrants, and all other business en- t'z 10 w management, will receive promptand i iieni.:Qn. c REFERENCES. Retard Brown, Nebraska City, Brown rill e. .JamCraisV . Bt. Joseph.Uo., n. Jameill. Hughes, . St. Louis, Jdo., .JobnR.Shepley, - f..CroTT,MsCreary4Co. - esrs. S.G. HutAardA Co- Cincinnati O. ti". J. M. Love, . Keokuk. Iowa. V Jun 7 lR'f. I. T. WHYTE Cz CO., HOLESAiZ AND RETAIL DEALERS IX W GOODS, GROCERIES Queensware, ,. Hardware, ! StoTr-i-. n-- JpOUNTRY PRODUCE. ! - BKOYNVILLE, X. Tl Si? ctK. Or G; W. IIURN. DEPUTY COUfiTY SURVEYOR, .-, ;,t NEUAUA ClTT, Nk T. WILL attend promptly to all business in his pro . fesion when called on : such as subdiriDtr Claims, laying out Town Lots, Drafting City Plats ete., etc. ' 37-tf OUTER BEKKKT. . ; TV. B..UAKE1T. JkVES r. riStE. " AUOC3TCS KNIGHT. OLIVER BENNETT & CO.," Manufacturers and AVhalesale Dealers in BOOTS AND SHOES, NO. ST 21 AIX STREET, (FQRMRLV,yo. l0l, CoRNEOP M AIJt.AND LOCCST.) ;ST. LOUIS. MO. ; WM. OSBORN. DEALER IN . CLOCKS, WATCHES, Jewelry, Plated Ware, Cutlery, Spoons, ic, 4c. Nebraska City, N. T. "Enobatinq and Kepairinq done on 'short notice and all work warranted. A. D. KIRK, ATTORNEY AT LAW, Land Agent and Notary Public, Archer, Richardson county, N. T. Will practice in the Courts of Nebraska, assisted by Harding and Bennett, Nebraska City. JACOB S AFFORD, Attorney and Counsellor at Law. GENERAL INSURANCE AND LAND AGENT. ' And Notary Public. Nebraska City, Nebraska Territory. W ILL attend promptly to all bnisness entruste l to his care, in Nebraska Territory and West- ern lowa. S-ptember 12, 1S56. vlnl5-ly W. P. LOAN, ATTORNEY AT LAW, LAND AND LOT AGENT. ARCHER, RICHARDSON COUNTY, N. T. Notice to Pre-Emptors G. S. HORBACH & CO. ATTORNEYS AT LAW AND REAL ESTATE BROKERS. OMAHA. CITY, N. T. T "V7TLL give particular attention to preparing nil V the necessary papers for Pre-emptions, and rendering any ass-stance which maybe required oy Pre-emptors in proving up their Pre-emption rights tt the u. s. Land oas-e. 45-'.m KARDIN3, KIMB0U6H & CO,. Hantfart,irerand wholes-tie Deahr in HATS, CAPS & STRAW GOODS, No 49 Main street, bet Olive and rine, Particuia attention paid t manufacturing cur UIICM .HOlC I e . f i tT . . I : it. rhhrii, m. u.y PHYSICIAN, SURGEON And ELDORADO, N. T. RESPECTFULLY tenders his professional ser- 1 rices to the citizens of Nemaha county and ad joining counties, both in Nebraska and Missouri. Jum 1 1th. 1857. M-6m J. HART & SON Oregon, Holt Couuty, Missouri. Keep constantly on hand all description of CarEess, .saddle", Hridles, c, 4c. ?. B. Every article in our shop is manufactured by ouxselvevuid warranted to give satisfaction. REAL ESTATE AGENCY. GEORGB CLATES. J. W. LES. CLAYES At LEE. Real Estate and General Agency, OMAHA CITY, N. T. References. James Wright, Broker, New York, u u CleTelani, m. A. Woodward, Lsq. : Hon. R. Wood, Ex-Gov. of Ohio, Wicks, Otic and Brownell, Bankers, i M Alcott & Uorton, M Col. Robert Campbell, St. Louia, James Ridgway, Esq. " Cniwrorn and Sackett' Chicaco. Omaha City, Aug. 30,1856. vlnl3-ly a. r. BSSETT, J. 8. aORTOX, H.H. HABDTNQ DENNET. MORTON & HARDING. Attorneys at Law, Nebraska City, X.,T., aud Glen wood, la. mils k mim W practice in all the Courts f Nebraska and UfirfW nf triP world and noble trees V Western Iowa. Particular 'attention M f J SQrldCe OI ine WOriQ, anu HOUie Wees bmDtlDsdWarrante--i collection of " REFERENCE: Hon. Lewis Cass, Detroit. I Julius D. Morton, . ilichiganj -Gov. Joel A. Matteson, Springfield, 111 ' , S J-)Y'me8' Iow CitJ Jo"; ' B. P. Fifiled, St. Louis, Mo.; Hon. Daniel O. Morton, Toledo, Ohio P. A. Sarpy, Bellevue, Nebraska: 1 Sedge wich A Walker, Chicago, 111; - Green, Weaje A Benton. Council Bluffj.Iowa' JAKES CAKOILL. ' OEO. W. CAMILL J. & G. W. CARGILL, FORWARDING AND COMMISSION IlIBRCIIArVTS.:-' AND -M ANUFACTIIRFUN uivkt Steamboat Landing, St. Joseph, Mo. i - -u-iuo, "CONSIGNMENTS of Goods and Prodace Xlt!' ed to as will be promptly and carefully attended to ai tae iowbsi rates. - -... . References. Tarlor A Shepherd, St. Louis, ' R. L. McGhee A Co., " J Li-eraore, Cooley A Co., ' " Merchants Generally, ,' St.Jo?ep. i. b. crinxa. "ons c. toek. i U Jill u a iu xtiv, Attorneys at Law & Real Estate Agents, OMAHA CITY, N. T, T7ILL attend faithfully and promptly to all busi. d .1 - ness entrusted to them, in the TerritorTal or Trva CV-rU. to the rurphs!e of lot and lands, n- . . a .... . buiidin'x, nearly ophite the Western Ex.-hanje Itonk, iartwtam street.--' ' Dee. S7.-159.- vlnSStf rr , . . t Miscellaneous, One Idea Hen , We have too many men in all occu pations M-ho have but one eet of ideas. Many a machinist will insist on believ ing that to do a day's work well is the requisite of all mechanical knowledge. His steadiness and patient skill are admirable, but he will turn up a dozen years hence, gray and worn, toiling at the vice or drooping at the lathe. He will be supporting a large family on one dollar and three-quarters or two dollars a day but that two dollars is the limit of all his possible daily Income. Mark us, that is the man who once said, "0, bother ! what do I want of a knowledge of general principles, mechanical calculations, drawing, busi ness information, and all that ? Why should I fill my head with all this stuff about the iron manufacture, estimation of machinery, mechanical engineer ing?" . Of course, you should not dis turb the priceless comfort of your easy soul. Of course, my 'dear sir, you should .stick close with a fire engine company, and devour cock-and-bull stories with the rapacity of a book seller's apprentice, or spend your time in a still more free and easy manner; but at all events you should not"bother your head where you are so wilfully opposed to any good which might come from-it. Meanwhile, you will find some of your companions, vice hands or lathe hands like -yourself, brake men or firemen even, pushing their way upward, gaining every year in skill and character, and ultimately ltua u.v kUC locomotive shop, the railroad, Or SOme V . t, . . tt other equally desirable position. You will still remain at the bottom, wonder ing where were the rounds on which your mates ascenueu to tortune ; and fretfully repining at the imagined un huckj fate eVer interposed bar riers to your advancement in lfe ; for- - . ' : . . ... . I . . .- . .. . gelling mai an inspiring energy must underlie all successful efforts to arrive at influence and distinction in the world. Journal of Progress The Suntoeam's GraTe. T Nothing in this vast creation is ever lost. Individuals may be losers through carelessness, but to the world at large no created substance can be lost. One combination of things is often changed into another, but no ingredient is ever utterlv destroyed, for at this moment the created universe does not contain one particle of matter more, nor one particle less, than belonged to it that day it came fresh from the creating Vn A nC TTI n, TirT-i r tinaAa oil Viinrr a wrv UaUUUl uiuinuvmuviiu.u68...Ji good. Never did a sunbeam shine in vain, and therefore no sunbeam that ever streaked this world with light could finally be lost. Yet the sunbeam lovely as it is, had its grave, and there sometimes for unnumbered ages it has slept in undisturbed repose. What is coal but latent sunbeams, which need only to be ignited to start out again into active life ? The sun, when many thousand y ears younger than he is now cast forth his radiant beams oh the of ferns and other acrogens started a his -bidding into vigorous life y they lived, rdiedj andunderweht 'changes which made them coal yes, coal I and the bid sun, hte "did.it all. ,' These sun beams have long been buried in the ferm of coal ; and though by ignition their 'resurrection-life is but " aJdim shadow. of their early brightness, they are yet sunbeams. We have nothing but sunlight in summer 1 or m winter. n. U44 tta wc wiy. The fire on our hearths, the gas in our tubes, the oil in our lambs, and the candles on our tables, are all the products of the sunbeam. , - We kindle them, and in the very act raise the sunbeam from its grave, and send it forth to run per chance a long cycle of changes ere again it rests in suclTJ place as )tha re VaTe dragged it; from.; The evil we do in the world is often paid hack in the bosom of homft. ' - . - I - . Une step in knowledge is one step iron jn;..0ne. 5 teplrcp sm i3 one step I ' " nearer Ut5aeu Contentment f :' As for a little more monejrimd ft lttle inore time, why 'tis ten to cne if either' one, or' the other would make you a whit happier. - If you had more time, it would be sure to hang heavily. It is the working man who is thdhappW uiau. . i.u.a.u "was tuaue iu ue ,acuvc, and he is never so happy as wjien he IS so. It is tne idle man trno'-ts'tiio miserable mani! "And, as" for money, dbnt you"' remember the ' old saying, "Enough is'as goodasafeast?" Money never made a man happy yet, nor will it.r ' There il nothing in its nature to produce happiness. The more a man has, the more he wants, and instead of its fillinsr a vacum. it makes one. If it satisfies one want, it doubles and .1 T trebles that want in another way. - That was a true proverb' of the wise man, rely upon it, . "Better is little with he fear of the Lord, than great treas- ures ana trouoie tnerewitn. via Jonathan ; or The Parish,' Helper. There is ' scarcely any lot so low, but there is "something" in it fo satisfy theman whom it has befallen'; provi dence having so ordered things, that in every man's cup, how bitter soever, there, i are , some , cordial drops,; some good circumstances, .which,, if wisely extricated,-are sufficient for the pur pose he wants; them that is, to make him contented, and, if not happy, at least resigned. Sterne.; ; . ; Antiquities of Kissin t rr In ancient Rome, kissing was an act of religion. The nearest friend of a dying person performed the rite of receiving his soul by a kiss, supposing that it escaped through the lips at the moment of expiration, ' as many pas sages in the'classical poets express.- The sacredness of the kiss was inviol able for. along time' before it was de graded into a current form of saluta tion ; and, if we may believe Pliny, its introduction as such was owing to the facility it gave" to" detect the degene rate Roman ladies, who (in violation of the old hereditary female delicacy of the Republic) indulged in secret potations of wine. It gradually became the common form of salutation among men, as it still continues to be in most Continental nations of Europe to this day. Among the early Christians the kiss resumed its importance. The jdss of peace was a sacred ceremony, observed upon the most solemn occa sions : it was called siqnacidum ora tionis the seal of prayer, and was a symbol of the mutual forgiveness and reconciliation required by the Church of all its members. In the Roman civil law the right of kissing was duly defined and protected. The kiss had all the virtue of a bond, granted as a seal to the ceremony of Betrothal, and if the contract was unfulfilled through default of the husband, he surrendered a moity ,of, the presents offered on that occasion, in expiation of the vio lence done to the modesty of the lady by a kiss. : Thus Shakespear makes Julia, in the Two Gentlemen of Ver ona,' after exchanging a ring with her lover, "seaf the bargain with a holy kiss ;" and traces of the same train of thought'; abound .in the old English writers." Ui : Always Firm. There are some whom the lightning of fortune blasts, only to render holy. Amidst all that humbles and scathes amidst all that shatters from their life is verdure, smites to the dust the pomp and summit of their pride, and In the very heart of existence writeth a sudden and "strange defeature," they stand erect riven, not uprooted a monument less of pity than of awe !: There- are some "who pass through - the lazar-hbuse; bf Misery, with a step more august than a Caesar's in his hall. The very things which seen alone, are despicable and vile associated with them, become almost venerable and divine ; and one ray, however dim .and feeble of that intense holiness, which, in 'the Infant Odd, shed majesty over the manger, and the straw, not denied to these who, in the depth.of .affliction, cherish His patient Repose is the perfection of activity. Great talents impose great obliga tions. Only the quiet heart can know the granduer of repose. Tho heart is not deeply moved while we count its beatings. To the pure, all purity is manifest; to the strong, all emergency. No man is the exemplar of all great, ness. One man is the carrier of one kind of greatness one of another. Achilles wins the victory, and Homer immortalizes it we bestow the laurel crown on both. Love is like a river, if the current be obstructed it will seek some other channel. It is not unfrequently the case that the kisses and attentions be stowed on the' child of six years are intended for her sister of sixteen. A Gentle Hint. Rev. Jonathan French j of South Andover, was to be supplied with wood by his parishion ers, according to the terms of his set tlement. Winter was coming on, but no wood had been furnished. Mr. French waited until the Governor's proclamation for Thanksgiving came, when, after, reading it to his people, he said, with great apparent simplicity; "My brethren, you percieve his excel lency has appointed next Thursday as a day of Thanksgiving, and according to custom, it is my intention to prepare two discourses .for that occasion pro vided I, can write them without a fire." The hint took, and on the next day all his winter's wood was in his wood-yard. A Lesson of Solomon. 1 The old man was toiling through the burden and heat of the .day, in culti vating his field with his own hand, and depositing the promising seed into the fruitful lap of yielding earth." Sud denly there stood before him, under the shade of a huge Linden tree, a vis ion. : The ' old man was struck v with amazement. ". - "I am Solomon," said the phantom, in a friendly voice. : "What are you doing here, old man?" "If you are Solomon," replied the venerable labor er, "how can you. ask this? In my youth you sent me to the ant; I saw its occupation, and learned from that insect to be industrious and to gather. What I then learned I have followed out to this hour,"' "You have only - learned half your lesson," resumed the spirit. "Go to the ant, and learn from that insect to rest, in the winter of your life, and to enjoy what you have gathered up." - A great poet represents a great por tion of the human race. Nature del egated to Shakspeare the interests and direction of the whole; to Milton a smaller part, but with plenary power over. it. And she bestowed on him such fervor and majesty of eloquence as on no other mortal in any age. Southey. . (.! What a blessing are metaphisics to our generation! A poet or other who can make nothing clear, cankstir up enough sediment to render the bottom of a basin a3 invisible a3 the deepest gulf in the Atlantic. The shallowest pond, if turbid, has depth enough for a goose to hide M3 head in. Landor. . A Mother's Counsel. ; Forty years ago, a mother stood on the green hills of Vermont, holding by the right hand a son, sixteen years of age, mad with love of. the sea. And, as she .stood by the garden gate, that sunny morning, she said:, "Edwin, they tell me, for.I never saw the ocean, that the . great temptation. of a sea man's life is drink. ...Promise me be fore yon quit your, mother's hand, that you will never drink." I gavo the promise, and I went the -hroad globe overr Calcutta, the Medlteranean, San Francisco, the Cape ot Good Hope, the North Pole and the South saw them all in forty years, and I never saw a glass filled with Sparkling liquor that my' mother's form by the garden gate, on. the green hill side of Ver mont, tlM not rJire.lefVs-.me, ;and to ilav, at sixt mv !lr,3 .arc", innocent of the faste of liquor? image, flings" over the rneane3t locali ties of earth an : emanation from the glory of Heaven. A Sceptic's Ccr.:3l2t!ct:i; r One drop from the pure fountain cf faith would havo yielded incalculable refreshment and strength. His thoughts I might have been profound, but they were not pious; even on the confines of death, the question "to be cr net to be,"i presented itself to him ; ho re peated, not the Lord's Prayer, but the dogmas of his false philosophy, "Man is a production of parents and nurses,' of art and time, of breath and air, of sound and light, of food and clothes ! And the superior part of - us, mind, that is an action of materials ; ; without phosphor there would be no mind ! The action of electricity upon certain materials, bound together by nerves, creates that sensibility of brain which we call consciousness." "To Be, or not to Be"by S,ans Christian An derson. . . . , : -v . ... Prayer Meetings. The Rev. John Newton says in a letter to, a brother clergyman : . I look upon prayer meeting3 as the most profitable exercises excepting the public preaching in which Chris tians can engage ; they have a direct tendency to kill a worldly trifling spirit, to draw down a divine blessing upon all pur concerns, compose differences, and enkindle at". least to maintain the flame of divine love among breth ren. But I need not tell you the ad vantages ; you know them : I only would exhort you ; and the rather, as I find in my own case, that the princi pal cause of my leanness and unfruit fulne33 is owing to an unaccountable backwardness to pray. I can write, read, or.converse, or hear with a ready will; but prayer is more inward and spiritual than any of. these ; and the more spiritual any duty is, the more my carnal heart is apt to start from it. When a sin 13 let in a3 a suppliant, it remains in as a tyrant. The Arabs have a fable ofa miller who was one day startled by a camel's nose thrust in the window of the room where he r . was sleeping. "It is very cold out side," said the camel, "I only want to get my nose in." The nose was let in then the neck, and finally the whole body; Presently the miller 'began to be extremely inconvenienced by the ungainly companion he had obtained, in a room certainly not large enough for both. "If you are inconvenienced you may leave," said the camel ; "as for myself, I shall stay where I am' Moral Influence of Needle-work. Richter says: "Most -of the finger works, whereby the female quicksilver is made stationary, bring with them this mischief the ; mind, remaining idle, either grows rusty with dulnes3, or is given over to the circling maze of fancy, where wave succeeds wave. Sewing and knitting needles, for in stance, keep open the wounds of disap pointed love longer than all the romances in the world; they are thorns which prick through the drooping roses. But give the poun'g girl such an occupation as poung men generally have, which shall require a new thought every min ute, and the old one cannot be contin ually raying up and glaring before her. Especially change of employment con tributes to.heal woman't heart; con stant progress in some one thing, man's. Bishop Otey, of " Tennesse, ii not opposed to the cultivation of innocent amusement. His pleasant disposition is illustrated by the following reniark of his: "Thirty years' ago I came to Tennessee with my wife, my fiddle and a horse and sulky. My horse and sul ky are long since gone, but my wife and 'fiddle remain as good as new!" i ' Into the auprust presence cf Reccr de'r'Hni, carae,an? ceremonic, Misther Martin O'Toole, his round; red face beaming with smiles' and rum, leaving t . t. - it. . . r . iur-iii ma naive tue oiucer y.uo "spoi- teel" hira for trial. -How are yees, oay how, yer honor! lere I am arain drunk and disorderly fine 3 and the ccst3 divll the cint 1. ...4 0 pay, at all to the work-Louse' blessed institution that; saving the lack of jiggers thanks to the kaythenishf council.. Out with yer sintince I'm hroublsd wid anxiety to reach my o!iT quarters. Dye mind, yer honor, dlvil " a cint Jo pay; at all; at all." V ; ' :. : And the self committed O'Toole, be ing ccrroberated by the statement cf the oScer, had the satisfaction of see ing the mittimus handed to that func tionary! and with a "Hince wid yees,"' ye dirty blackguard," he left the court leaving tho crowd around . convulsed - , with laughter. . Yankee Doodle. In a carious book on the Round Towers of Ireland the origin of the term Yankee Doodle was traced to the Persian ' tAm-: j xT "Yankee dooniab," or . "iniabihints of the New World." Layard in his book on "Nineveh and Remains," also men tions Yanghidumia as tho Persian name for America. "Tom, you sot," said a temperance -, man to a tippling friend, "what makca you drink such stuff as you do? 'Why the very hogs won't touch that brandy! "That's 'cause they're brutes," said Tom. "Poor creates ! they dunnb what's good: " ' r- 1 "Ma, does pa kis3 "you because ho loves you so?" inquired a little. fenxi.. ous plug bf his mother. "ToK sure, my son; but why do you ask that ques tion?" -Well, I gness he loves tho-kitchen-girl, too: for I seed him kis;i. her more nor fotiy times last Sunday . when you was to chnrch."- htrewaj a ICS's in that family. ' . ' ' - ''. . .1 : Coleridge's-' Classification . . or Readers. Readers may' ho divided' into four classes. . , :,j . . r . "1. Sponges, .who absorb' 'ail they read, and return it nearly in.tho saao state, only a little dirtied.; - .-'' , "2. Sand glasses, who retain noth ing, and are content to geS through ;a book for the sake of getting, through the time. . -, f , "3. Strain bags, who retain merely the dregs of what they read. "4. Mogul diamonds, equally .rare and. valuable, who profit bj-.what .they read, and enable others to profiit by it also." ..'.".. Female Novelists. Lady ' Mary Montague says, "Every young lady who ha3 read two novels can write a third." To cast a glance at the 'bcqk notices' in ourpnper?, one woid 1 swear that what "every young lady"' can Cq she has done. . ; ."Mr. Showman, what's that?" That ray dear, is the Rinocerow.. He ii cousing German or Dutch relative -to the Unicorn. He was born in the des ert of Sary Anne, and fed on bamboo and missionaries. lie 13 very coura geous, and never leaves home unle3 io uojc;, iu nmtu u.iac g'JCS SOinC-- where else, unless he is overtaken bV the dark. He was brought 'to -'this country very much' rgainst lds'owii will, which accounts for his low snirit3 when' he is melancholy or deje"cted;-i-He is now very aged, although he las been the youngest specimen of anima ted 'nature in the world. Pas3cn,'rny little dear; and allow the ladies to sur vey the wisdom of Providence, as Vk-. played in the ring:tailed monkey'," a hanimal as can ' stand 'aninir like a fellow crcetur, only it's reversed..' ;. ' "Harry," said tt young lady at'-the theatre, "how I should like to be'in actress." "An actress, Ilcnriettei why?" "Oh! it must be so nice to ba made love to in such pretty words evs rij evening. - r - .'."Gingerf "Sahl"' "Wheamrdit great race to come off dat dir.is.na much talk abo 1 hu 1 1,ccra c p.F: r: rSl rDc humar. race, :V'; v.t aaU 10 cjm c:. .:ora iongT , . . . . ... . .... T T . lho merit or r iij?cr.l:v. v;trn I cannot covir.iav.d circumstance, - J3 tt r recondite Ki' to them. 1 j '1 I