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About Nebraska advertiser. (Brownville, Nemaha County, N.T. [Neb.]) 1856-1882 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 10, 1857)
(Mil- flf (i . r Ay Ay Ay (p A Ay . DEVOTED TO "ART, SCIENCE, AGRICULTURE, COMMERCE, NEWS, POLITICS, ' GENERAL' INTELLIGENCE AND THE INTEREST'S OF NEBRASKA. VOL. II. CITY OF BROWNVILLE, NEMAHA COUNTY; N T. , THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 1857. NO. 11. fllR ... fl ; I it y i i ; i t . i ii II n i ! I ira'slut' 2li)krii$cr DITM AND rrBLISCED EVERT TECKSDAT BT W.. FURNAS icond .Street, let. Haia and "Water, " (Lake's Block,) CROWNVILLE, X. T. int ycr if rai J in advance, - - - $2,00 a . " " " at the end oi G months, 2,50 m- V .. . 12 3 00 ,-of If or tw.re wiU ..e far;.;. Lei at S1,5J per ji. oviJed the ctih accou-janics the order, KATS OF ADVERTISING: uare, (12 lines or Ic?,) one insertion, $1,00 0,0 2,50 4,00 6,00 10,00 5,00 60,00 35,00 iiiitionul insertion, marc, one month ' 44 three month.', " six months, u one year, c.s Crls of six lines or less one year, :iln:nn, one- year, ,alf Column, one year, roanb " " izhth Culumn, six months, alf Column, six months j . " ' .ourth " " . - i-hth rt : " Cu'lumn, three months, half Column, three months, fourth . " " eighth " " " nncin' e.mlidates for officc,'( in advance,) 18,00 10,00, S5.00 20.00 10,00 8.00 20,00 13,00 .10,00 6,00 5,00 h in adraBce will be required for all adrertisc- t except where actual. responsibility is known a pt cent for each change be added to the inlinjr Business Cards of five lines orles3,for 8 ras. -ear, 5.00. ; advertisements will be considered by the year, . s-ocified on the manuscript, or previously jJ upon between the parties. Ireriisemcnts.not marked on thecopy for a .peer number of insertion?, will be continued until or i out, and charged u.cordingly. 1 adrertijements from strangers or transient per . to be paid in advance. ic privilege, of yearly advertisers will be conSncd !y t3 their own business : and all advertisements lert.unin.. thereto, to be raid t,r extra early advertisers nave the. privilege of changing r advertisements ouartcrly. II leaded advertisements charged double the above s. irertienents on -jred extra. the inside exclusively will be BOOK AND FANCY OB PRINT I N G! Having added to tho'A-drcrtiscr Office Card and 'fb 1'resscfc, New Types of the latest styles, Inks of U colors, Bronzes, Fine Taper, Envelopes, c. ; we re now prepared to, execute Job Work of every de 'ription In a Style unsuqmssed by any other office a the United States. ' Particular attention'will be given to orders from a Stance in having them promptlyattcnded to. The Proprietor, who, having had an extensive ex rien'e, will give his personal attention to this branch i business, and hopes, in his endeavors to please, nb in the excellence of his work, and reasonable re?,to receive a share of the public patronage. M BUSINESS. CARDS. BltOWXVII.LE. A. S. HO LL AD AY, H. D. SURGEON, PHYSICIAN -ATrxci OlDStctrician. . ; BROWXTILLE," X. T.; . 5? lieits a Fhare of public patronage, in the various fanche of h is profession, from the citizens of Brown-. T.1U and vicinity. " MISS MARY TURNER, ' Ana Drcsd IMaltcr. First Street, between Main and "Water, 13 R O W XV ILLE, NV T. Bonnets and Irimmings always on hand. C. W. WHEELER, T- MID BUILDER. frXSri 323. ASD HTHZSZ Drownvillo, 3NT. "IT- JAMES W. GIBSON, BLACKSMITH -Second Street, between Main and Nebraska. BROWNVILLE, N. T. G. W. IIUBN. DEPUTY COUNTY SURVEYOR. TEMAIIA CITY, N. T. attend promptly to all business in his pro . fCSKien when called on: such as subdiving laim, laying out Town Lots, Drafting City Hats ,tc. 37-tf UVer BKNXET. gAE8 T. FISKK. Ot. B. GAKKIT. ArGCSTUS KXIGIIT. OLIVER BENNETT & CO., Manufacturers and Whalcsale Dealers in BOOTS AND SHOES, XO. R7 ?,T AIX STREET. F0KKEI.T, Xo. 101, CoBNB OF M AIM AND I.OCCST.) ST. LOUIS, MO. 1 WM. OSBORN. CLOCKS, WATCHES, DEALER IS Jewelry, lifted Ware, Cutlery, Spoons, i.e KehrasJca City; N. T. Lc. Engraving and REPAintxa .done on short """"ee, and ALL WOnK WARRANTED. I. T. WHYTE & CO., WHOLES ALU AND KETAtL PEALERS IN Ml GOODS. GROCERIES. 0. 1 ARCH1TEC Queensware, Hardware, COUNTRY PRODUCE. BllOYNVILT.r:, N. T. Tfce Farm and Garden. Bone-Dust for Cattle-Bone Disease. Iesshs. Editors la your article on salt, ground horns, &c, for cattle, you recommend feeding them togeth er a practice which I followed for several years, until observation con vinced me that it was wrong. I found hat my cows ate several times as much bone when in full flow of milk as when dry,' and at- such time.? w ould eat salt o their injury in order to get a supply of bone. I have since had a partition in my box, and fed them separately. I believe bone as necessary as salt for milch cows, and when kept on old pas tures is essential to their health, and improves the quality and quantity of their inilk. loung cattle cat much less bone than old ones. My cattle eat little, if any, until they were seven or eight years old, but have since eaten considerable. I believe that young cattle never have the "bone disease;" a complaint which 1 presume is much more com mon in its earlier stages than is sen- erally supposed. I well remember that when I was "cow-boy," the older cows were in the summer season sometimes troubled with a lameness or rather stiffness of the hind quarters, a sqeak ing and rattling of the joints, and an inability to raise their hind feet over the bars, lhese symptoms always disappeared as the cows dried up. -I had then never heard of the bone disease, but have since (some fifteen or twenty years ago,) seen a fatal case of it, and the first systoms were pre cisely the same as those above de scribed. The cow was old, and had been milked two years- in succession without drying. She lived many weeks after she was first taken, gradually rrowin worse until she lost the use of her hind legs, and would sit on her haunches eating the grass in a circle around her her owner still milking her, as he said for her benefit. A post mortem examination showed the bones very dry, particularly at the joints of the hind quarters. It the cow had been dried, or fed bone-dust without drying, she would probably have re covered. Anatomists tell us that the bones as well as other parts of an animal, are constantly being renewed so that that which is called bone disease, is sim ply starvation of the bones. A neigh bor informs me that his cow would cat but very little bone-dust when kept on hay from land that had been manured with bone. My cows consume from one-half bushel to a bushel each of bone in . a year. Common ground bone should not be fed. The article used is .the clean, dry sawdust and turning from the button-makers. C. Gent. II. V. W. Walcrburu, Ct. Ten Rules to be Cbserreil in Mak ing Butter. In making good butter there are sev eral nice operations to be gone through with, which require an eye to cleanli ness, forethought, and experience. 1. On milking clean, fast yet gently, resrularly twice a day, depends the success of the dairyman, .bad milkers should not be tolerated in a herd; bet- cr pay double the price for good ones. . 2. Straining is quite simple, but it should be borne in mind that two parjs about half full each will produce a neater amount of cream than the same milk if in but one pan; the reason of his is the greater surface. - 3. Scalding is quite an important feature in the way of making butter in cool weather; the cream rises much ouickdr, milk keens sweet longer, the butter is of a better color, and churns in one-half the time. 4. Skimming should always be done before the milk becomes loppered; otherwise much of the cream turns into whey and is lost. 5. Churning, whetner oy nana or otherwise, should occupy fifty minutes. G. Washing in cold soft water is one of its preserving qualities, and should hp rnntinned until it shows no color of the milk by the use of the ladle; very hard water is highly charged withjime, onH must m n, measure impart to it alkaline nronerties. . 7. Saltinr: is necessarily done witn the best kind of ground salt; the quan tity varies according to the state it is taken from the churn ; if soft, more if hard, less; always taking taste for the surest "uide. after about 24 hours, is for the purpose of givin rrmntpr comnactness. i or it 0. Second working takes place at the time of packing, and when the butter has dissolved the salt, that the brine mnv bo wnrked out. 1 0. Tacking is done with the hands or with a butter-mall: and when butter i nut into wooden vessels, they shoul br ;nnl:rfl turn nr three days in strong After ech pack ing, cover the butter witli a wet cloth and put, a layer of salt upon it; in this way the salt can easily be removed at any time, by simply taking hold of the edizes of the cloth. Butter made in this way will keep any length of time required. J.' O. Adams , G. Farm. How to Milk Clean. Messrs. Editors To "A Michigan Milkman, who asks for a "hin- sug ge.ition, or ite: experience, from any of your readers," in regard to de fective milking, I would give my meth od of milking. Each milker is requir ed to milk the same cows as far as practicable. Each time, and after the 11 Ml 1 1 . cows are an miiKca, we nein on one side of the yard, taking them in-rota tion as they stand, and strip each one thoroughly. But a little, it is true, is obtained from each cow, but in the ag gregate it amounts to something worth while, particularly when we consider that it is the very best of the milk, one quart of which is worth two of the first milking; and then you are sure -that the cows are all milked and well milk ed, especially if the owner be "around, ii i . i .i ovcnooKing ana aiaing in tne opera tion. I have practiced the above plan for several years past, and think it repays me well for the small amount of extra time and trouble expended. C. Gent. D. C. M. Chester i T. Breeding Short-Horns. Messrs. Tucker & Sox I send you an extract from a letter I have received from the well known breeder of Short Horns in England, and I think the most successful one in symmetry and qual ity (Sir Charles Knightly.) He says "If it is any gratification to know my opinion as to the breeding of Short Horns, I- shall have great pleasure in giving it you without reserve. My chief objection to the breeding from large bulls is, that one hardly ever sees a large animal of any description pos sessing symmetry, and I have always endeavored to get as near perfection in shape as I could. "It is a common, though I think an erroneous opinion, that by putting two animals together, both faultly m shape, but one having good shape where the other has bad, that one will correct the other. You cannot get a perfect herd of cows but by chance, care, and ex- nsc you may get a first rate bull. "My first desire is to get a good shoulder. T think it by far the first point to be attended to; and I believe n general it is little attended to. I , 1 . T 1 .1 may be wrong, out nave always set my face against using an upright shouldered bull. Not only do you ose the best part of the beef, but I be ieve you lose constitution. No ani mal with an upright shoulder can have a protuberant bosom, and consequent- y cannot have the same play tor the ungs, and the most common and tre- qucnt disease of cattle proceeds from he lungs. I would, in short, were 1 to use a faulthj bull, prefer that he should have every imaginable lault, rather han a bad shoulder. The two great faults belonging to the original breed of Short Horns were upright shoulders and large high hips, the latter of which are very much the fashion in the north of England, but Which I think a dc- ormity. It gives the animal the ap pearance of a bad loin when it does not deserve it, and causes the appearance of a hollowncss between the hip and the tail, which otherwise would not be the case. It ,has been' one of my hob by horses, tlmt provided the hips are not too narrow, to have tne nip joint project as little as possible. I bought he -Duke of Uloucester contrary to my own judgment. He had good flesh and hair, but a3 his calves were young when I sold them, I cannot form an oninion as to how they would turn out. 'Your countrymen have not tparca nwnev which I have always thought the most eilicient way ot getting a nera; but unless a man understands Vie thing himself, he will soon spoil them howev- l .1 v er goou xney iny uc. I consider bir (Jharles ivmghtiey 1 . - 7 TV w -w one of the finest old English gentle men in that country, and 1 have long known his enthusiastic desire to breed uniformity of tjvality have perceived it in his herd;-more than any otuer breeders' herd of ShortHorns in Eng land for many years, proof of which was shown by his steers in Smithheld The most uniform lot of three year old Short Horn steers, fifteen in number I ever' saw, was at Smithfield,bred and fed by him; their quality and their symmetry corresponded, which much influenced me in favor'of Sir Charles Knightleys herd. I have always closely observed them since, and have studied much from the information I have gleaned from him and his mode of breeding. This is the reason I send you some of his remarks. Country Gentleman, Wii. II. Sotiiam. Owcgo, Tiii3 Picture and that.. I have subdued the nations of the earth ; is there :rio other world for me to conquer ? Alexander the Great. I have fought a good ngut, I have finished my course, I Lave kept the faith : henceforth there 5s i laid up for me a crown of .rishteoui-.ress. fSt. PauL - -: rr ' Although the fig tree shall not blos som, neither shall fruit be on the vine, the labor of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; and the flock shall be cut off from ths. fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls ; will I reioice in the Lordj I will ioy in the'God of .my salvation. Habakkuk. - - . V - I I am taking a leap in the dark. fllobbs when dyino - - I Though! walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. fDavid. ' O ! God if there bo a God have mercy on me. Thomas Paine when i dymor. Eor 1 know that my redeemcrliveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth ; and though after my skin, worms destroy this body, yet in mv flesh shall I see God. fJob. in view of death. i. ' Growth Of the Mind. Wl ,1,! Tr ' I 1 I V V VUUVi y liiVAvvvtj - iia-vu m w ooi. f arA J T nnnnn,! f n .a lo hL i;,0(i oi. ready on the earth. I apprehend that the distance between the "iind of New- TTff rnn unrriuaan a of no hmaan KJtn , Angel. There is another view still more cfi.;i.;. .-TMNWfnn wu lifted his calm, sublime eye to the heavens, and read among the planets and the stars the great law jot the ma terial universe, was, forty or hfty years before, an infant without one clear per ception, and unable to distinguish his nurse's arm from the pillow on which he slept. Howard, too, who, under the strength of, an all-sacrificing benevo n-nna avnlnrn tho MPmna nt mimnr i r 1 buumiug, , ui v a . ' 11 v, ii .ULUSU, illilSpiUil ail ttll 11C , (kUU Ui- most oreaKing ius iiiiio ueart wilu iits - . i .i ii . . -.i . f , TT ' . , ' j a i neiu lias not man aireauy .raverseu 3 9 a . caiatca mm J Thoughts from Dr. WhatCly. It is one thing to prav that we may earn what is right, and another to pray hat we may find ourselves in the right, v ho were the orthodox, and who , T 11 were the true worshipers in israei. when Elijah was left . alone of the t ii i i -i ?i. n i ' i. ' i uord s propnets, wnue .jjaai s propnets were four hundred and fifty men? m many a case oi innovation, it i r" .: z l mignt oe lounu tua wnat is new ia uut . i i i. e- i -.i j. i. . . : . ruug, uuu iiiiiu nun. is niuu ia uui new. " Some men are zealous for truth, pro- vided it be truth, brought to light by themselves. The old proverb "a fool can ask more Questions than a wise man can answer," may very fairly have this added to it: A wise man cannot ask more Questions than he will find fools enough ready to answer, Men, in thinking only of what they . are running Irom, torget . what they - - are running towards. Tt hpiipvft in Chrisfinnitv. without knowing why we believe- in it, is not Christian faith, but blind credulity. Christian Progress. It is the work of a life-time to be come, a Christian. Many, oh ! many a time, are we tempted to say, "I make '"""J - no progress at all. It is only failure ' 1 . " .. after failure. - JNothing grows. JNow i.u -i. i u,- .Kflrl ;, lOOli. Ill tUC SCd. ucu mo uuuu i v.uii- uoanastsnaoy mesea-Deacn, - i-i.xi.i i i and you win mini, mat me ceaseiew w dome of St. Peter's-y our ry than thought to the instinctive ten flnr find rfiflur is but retrogression J,1- UA J . s . ,.,0i rr i;. , .11 i i ixxi i - a n TJ..f nr3. in anhour's time, andthe ocean has ad- 1 . ...t x- .nt vanced. Every advance has been be- yondthe last, and every retrograde movement has been an imperceptible trifle less than the last, lhis is pro cress to be estimated at the end of hours, not minutes. , And this i3 Chris tian progress. Many a fluctuation, many a backward motion, with a rush at times so yehement that all seems lus. ; uu 11 ui ti u uu ica., . . . . .-t l.itln. - hna r n n ro rrnin onn the next does not carry us back so far iuuU10 xic-o . w-brtx, -uu as we were before. , Every advance is a real gain, and part of it i3 never lost. Both when we advance, and when we fail, we gain. We are nearer to God than we were before. The floods of spirit-life have carried us up higher on the everlasting shores, where the waves of life beat no more, and its fluctuations end, and all is safe at last. Usefnl .to Everybody. IIow to Clean Pars. The season. for wearing furs is rap idly approaching, and as doubtless many of our lady readers would bo obliged to us for teaching them to "make them as good as new," we sub join the following directions : Strip the fur articles of their stuff ing and the binding, and lay them as much as possible in a flat position. They must then be submitted to a very brisk brushing with a stiff clothes brush; after this, any moth eaten parts must be cutout and be neatly replaced by new bits of fur to match. Sable, chinchilla, squirrel, flich, &c, should 1 , 1 1 1 -IT- do treated as ioiiows: v arm a quan- lllJ new bran in a pan, taking care that it does not burn, to prevent which i. i 1 , 1 . 1 11 musc oe actively stirred. When weli warmed, rub it thoroughly into tne fur with your hand; repeat this two or tnree times; then shake the fur, and give it another sharp brushing, - r wl.:i. r. uum nee uuui uuai,. . n unu iuis, ermine, eve, may be cleaned as tollows: laJ the lur on the table, and rub it well with bran made moist with warm water rub it until quite dry, and afterwards with dry bran. The wet bran should . - . . . , be put on with Hannel, and the dry with a piece ef book muslin. The light iurs, in addition to the above, 1 1,1 U 1 - .1 SUUU1U UC IUUUUU VillU rt 1 1 Dran process. Furs may be much im proved by stretching, which may-be managed as follows: To a pint ot soft w , ainie. inC. 01 Salt a!S soiveu, wua mis solution sponge tne inside of the skm (taking care not to lt the fur) until it becomes thorough- iYsaiuraieu; men lay it careiuny on u uuaiu, vtiiu tuc iui siuu uununaiu, in its natural position, then stretch as much as it will bear, and to the requir ed shape, and fasten with small tacks The drying maybe quickened by plac ing the skin about six or eight inches from the fire or stove. Medicine and War. I . . O - iiiic ait ui uicuiuuc auu uig aid ui Will The last ha8 for its obiect tlie destruc tion, the first the preservation of the mi . 1 .1 , -.i i. i nnu umcuiuuuuus ui rum, uuu auxious ly resolves among different schemes nt the-se,T which shal scatter destruction to the widest extent nnil tilth t.hA snrnst mm. Hi3 r.rnrrrpsq is marked by devastation and blood, by depopulated fields and smoking villa- ges, and the laurels which he wears are bedewed by the tears of widows and or phans. The acclamations which he wins from one portion of his species are l . 1 1 ." answered bv the curses and execrations of another ; and the delusive splendor, .i i.Tf.j j.i mo. proud ana imposing array witn which he contrives to gild the horrors i ! r i -. i ii oi ms proiesuon, are uuime pomp aim . ? i. r x mL rcunue .01 me muS 01 terrors. xu uri ui liu&nu putc.ua ilu u. i.tu.e and secrecy like the great processes ot nature, to scatter blessings on all with in its reach ; and the couch of sick ness, the silent retreat of sorrow and despair, are the scene of its triumphs. Heat Upon the Icchergs. A rolling noise is heard, like the thunder peals of our autumnal temp- ests, and we sec the head of an iceberg 1 r .1. 1 l r ii separate irom the trunk, and iaiicrasn- 1 1 1 1 ii " i i ing into tne sea, tnrowing up clouds of spray to a great hight. lhc mon ster osculates several times, a3 11 to recover itselt upon its base, or perhaps in rIoti nf sf.lnt.fl.tlnn t.n nther irfthnrn-s: for who can interpret the mysterious " "o r 7 language ot nature A long swell goes to announce, at a distanac of sev- eral miles, , its entry into the world; a ?..x - .t.:-.k i.. Iew nimutes more, aau uiat u.u nmir rrna n Hnnnn fldTlt tlfirnnn M ft T . r" " .V, ' V "fe r : , oi me iamny oi giants. j. uiau. uuu . - . , , ,,,, . i uttie vou are in me worm i im. .ai. , - ' i i vour Dvramius iwo uuuureu uisu rvremnn : nere are mountains emut hundred feet out of the water, and nunurea ieet out oi tuo i, auu "iLU uasc3 l vr. V? with bases two thousand feet deep ; " u"me " .UItiu; of four hundred feet. Memoirs of Lieutenant BeUot. To Make Y iiitewasii that will xot Rub Off. Mix up half a pailful of lime and water, ready to put on the wall; then take one gill of flour, and ty..-- it m.tl. 4-Vi- Tcofoi. tliori Tinn? nn if i -i- . sufficient to thicken it; I o . . . -t i h . - x th ryhitewash: r ... stir all well together, and it is ready ior use. The pleasure of love i3 in loving. We are happier in the passion we feel, than in that which we excite. The identical-first glass which crea 1 ted all the drunkards has recently been discovered. . Food for T&inkers. Newspapers. J udge Longstrect, of Georgia, whose views on any subject are sensible, practical, and worth treasuring, thus sets forth tha. value of a newspaper : "Small is the sum that is required to patronize a newspaper, and most am ply remunerated is the patron. I care not how humble and unpretending the gazette he takes, it is next to impossi ble to fill a sheet fifty two times a year without putting in something that is worth the subscription price. Every parent whose son is olf from home, should supply him with a paper. I well remember what difference there was between those of my schoolmates who had, and those who had not access to newspapers. Other things being equal, the first were decidedly superior to the last in debate and composition at least. The reason is plain they have command of more facts. Youths will peruse a paper with delight, when they will read nothing else." No Advantages for Education. It is often said by those who have risen from poverty to comfortable prop erty, when speaking of their children, that they hadn t the advantages of cd ucation. This is a poor plea. Culture comes to any one who desires it enough to get it. No one can help being ed ucated who opens his eyes and ears and keeps them open in thi3 world. X. M. The conversation of the intelligent, the reading for the million, the lecture sys tem, and ten thousand things become the teachers of the willing heart and progressive mind. - Persons will refrain from evil-speak ing when persons refrain from evil hearing. If we can still love those who have made us suffer, we love them all the more. Like as a chameleon hath all colors save white, so hath a flatterer all points save honesty. Real difficulties are the best cure of imaginary ones because God helps us in the real ones, and so makes us ashamed of the others. "There are three things to be de sired in this world," say the Chinese; "male progeny, official employment, and long life." There is but one man who can be lieve himself free from envy, and it is he who has never examined his own heart. "v. As frost to the bud and blight to the blossom, even such is self-interest to friendship; for confidence cannot dwell where selfishness is porter at the gate I Librarie3 are the shrines where all th reicg f ' t f n f true virtue n nfl t..t w:fiinnf. ,i(ln,;nn nn,1 imnn. ' I . - - u are preserved and reposed. Bacon Humility is a grace that adorns and beautifies every other grace ; without it, the most splendid, natural and ac quired acquisitions lose half their charm. With many readers, brilliancy of style passes for afiluence ' of thought ; they mistake butter-cups in the grass for immeasurable goldmines under the ground. He is a great simpleton who imag ines that the chief power of wealth is to supply wants. In ninety-nine cases out of almndred it creates more wants xi. ;. ! luau 11 ""PP11 Tfthn ir0rld suspect your well-in- tcnjC(i design, be not uneasy. It only sh0ws that mankind arc themselves . . taIse and artiul) ,Yhlcll 13 the causo 0i ,1 1 tneir DCinS suspicious. Indolence is a delightful but distrcss- . we must be doing something nua 1. 0.:nn ?, lPc,n.n u tj uv'w" "w dencies of the human frame. HazliU. There ig a kina 0f physiognomy in the titles of books, no less than in the faces of men, by which a skilful ob server will a3 well know what to ex pect from the one a3 the other. But ler. Happiness is much more equally divided than some of us imagine. One man may possess most of the material I lm. little .-f tlir 4 -..nrr another may very possess much of the thing, but .!. . ... few ot the materials. Begesning of Sin. If we would put a stop to the beginning of sin, we must begin first where sin begins, namely, in the heart and thoughts; which the Gospel has sumccted to tho Law of God, as well as the outward actions, - which was the error of the Pharisee j who took care of the outward man on- ly. Ihis will make our duties easy Joker's Colnnra. "My son, what did you bite your brother for? Now I shall have to trhip TV 1 . 1 .1 1 you. von z you remember the. go.uen rule I taught you: If you wouldn't like to have yourtrother Lite you, you' shouldn t bite him. "Ho, mother, get out with your whipping. If you wouldn't liko to have mo whip you, 'taint right for you to whip me, are it t Some gentlemen being at a tavern together, for want of diversion, one pro posed play ; "hut," said another of the company, "I have fourteen gocd rea sons against gaming. ft "What are they, said another. "In the first place," answered her "I have no money." , ; "U I said the other, "if you hau iour hundred reasons, you need not name another." A lady is said to be beastly beauti ful when attired in a full set of sable, otter, and lynx skins. It is a remark able thing, in connection with this sub ject, how much sooner the weather seta in "bitter cold to those furnished with handsome furs, than to those iiot so fortunate. A Danish writer speaks of it nut so miserable that it did not know which way to fall, and so kept standing. This is liko the man that had j uch a complication of diseases that lie did not know what to die of, and so lived on. A pompous fellow raado a very in adequate offer for a very valuable prop erty, and, calling the next day for an answer, inquired if the owner had en tertained his proposition. "No," replied the other, "your prop osition has entertained me." , A foppish fellow advised a friend not to marry a poor girl, as ho ; would find matrimony, with poverty;, up-hill work." "Good," said I113 friend, "P would rather go time." . 1 up-hill than down-hill, any. The Difference. A gentleman having a large sized six shooter.in h.a hand,. was asked : ' . "Pray, sir, is that a horse pistol? "No, sir," he replied, "it3 only a Colts !n A bookseller advertises "new chil dren's books." This is somewhat like the man who advertised "re 1 .children's stockings black men's leather glovc3 plain ladies' fur soles and mahogany !. .lilrn.i'a Tri.r2 ?' ! VUHUt .U J VUMliitJ . There is a vast deal of ;oimd phil osophy in the vulgar distich " - "Di CT;rc n IrnZTh JliIeT en t epin.ons; Some likps leeks and somo likes iniornt."' "Ah! my dear fellow," said an old man once to a friend, "I am quite weak and broken down with age. I used to walk entirely round the park every day; but now I can walk only half way round and back again." . , - "Did yc vote yesterday, "Michael?" "Sure I did, according to th. instruc tions." L ' "An' what were the instructions?" "Didn't you hear them ? and often!" . vot early. "What kind of wood is that ?" "Its cord-wood," replied the chop per, with the greatest nonchalance. "How long has it been cut V" inquir ed the anxious captain. "Four feet,".. said the chopper. . Thorcau, the Concord philosopher, says that if a ya-nkee happens to fall asleep after dinner and take., a nap. of half an hour, the first thing he. does' after waking i3 to stretch himself and ask "what's the news ?" . ' Men kis3 the hands of wcraen after kissing their lip3 on probably tho same principle that children, unwilling to leave the tempting fruit, oat the skin of the apple after devouring; the apple itself. . Tho kind lady who sent its" a mince pie, says a cstern editor, w ith the re quest "please insert," ia assured that sucharticle.3 are never crowded out by a press of other matter. ' A modern writer thus dc!ine3 honor : "Standing fire well, and shooting a friend whom you love, in order to gain the praise of a few othera whom you despise. . , "Do you keep the bf.r here?'' in quired a traveller of a gentlemanly bar-room loafer, a few days, since. . "No, sir, the bar keeps fao here." A country paper ' lately got up an account ofaftrpj headed: "Destruc tive Fire Eleven luil ling?, Ten Horses and Ono Cow in Ruins.". A patent has been taken cut in Bos tod for cleaning sh, ty giving them snuff; when they snec;.'.', .their come off. seaie3