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The Commoner.
VdLTJME 10, NtJMBEE 38
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Tho Tariff
Tariff on soap, . .
Tariff on rope, . .
Tariff on sugar and copper. ,
Tariff on shoes,
Tariff on screws,
Those who must- buy come1 a 'cropper.
Tariff on brass,
Tariff on glass,
Tariff on coffins and cradles.
Tariff on stool,
Tariff on meal,
Tariff on dlppertf and ladles.
Tariff on glues,
Tariff on booze, -
Tariff on halters and bridles.
Tariff on boots,
Tariff on fruits,
tlarlff on Bibles and idols.
Tariff on hay,
. .Tariff on clay,
Tariff on coal oil and candy.
Tariff on jugs,
Tariff on drugs
Isn't that tariff a dandy?-."..
Tariff on boots, .'
Tariff on sheets,
Tariff on woolons and cottons:;,.;
Tariff on beans, ;.'.;. -:
Tariff on screens, V- ' '
Isn't the whole tariff rotten? ' '. '
Tariff- on lead,
Tariff on bread,
Tariff on organs, piai.os. "' '
Tariff on straw, , . ,..l(
Tariff on -slaw, . :t,'.. . ;
Tariff on prunes and bananas.
'-A?
Tariff on socks,
Tariff on clocks;
Tariff on all of creation;
But, glory bo!
Thoy didn't agree
To put a stiff tax on salvation.
ship, As an example of too previous
enumeration of the poultry while the
eggs are in process of incubation this
is" entitled to the ribbon. Mr. Can
non may not be eligible when the
timo comes.
Quito a number of g. o. p. con
gressional candidates are regretting
that their nominating conventions
were held prior to" the Maine election.
Some of these days we hope to see
a, city that boasts, of tho kind of popu
lation it has, rather than the number.
. The Illinois republican state con
vention seems to have had its for
gettery working full time on the
Lorimer person.
i
Since the Maine election the bar
bers have seriously considered rais
ing the price of shaves to 20 cents
for all g. o. p. candidates.
Doubtless thero. are a number of
administration supporters who wish
they possessed Senator Hale's politi
cal foresight.
"Dioxydiamidoarsenobensol" is the
name of a new blood remedy recent
ly discovered in Germany. Sounds
like an administration defense of the
Aldrich tariff law.
also very generally unconcerned
about it. ,
Jealousy consists" largely in always
looking for something you hope never
to find.
The man in love with his work
is never much concerned about tho
whistle.
Men wfto labor for the reward of
public, approbation seldom hear the
cheering.
Crooked politics thrives best where
tho cry of "vote the ticket straight"
is loudest.
The mpro money one has the
easier it is to talk about the bles
sings of poverty.
It would be easy to get to heaven
it. we were allowed to be the sole
judges of our own conduct.
Funny, isn't it, but tho boy who
is so anxious at eighteen to have a
heavy beard is even more anxious at
forty to get rid of it.
DO YOU
NT A NEW BED?
ThwBwMtlful Vamlre Bnowr
White, Guaranteed ) qd
StnihireBedrTO
Wa ntnL'D "If ntvlno 41... l- a
and boatbcdiiln tho World. Wo
oll them at lo vr Factorjrl'rlccs
You can trrthom S0rinv y.fnl
you buy.ffjarwrito for Factory
Prices and Bod Ca.ta.inn ran.'
Marlon Iron fc Braw Bed Co., JOQMaln St., Marlon, IntC
x
f Prices 08ent1l,raeS
Chicago Scale Co.
StP"
Eyeglasses
Not Necessary
That Hie eyes can be strengthened so that eyeglasses
can be dispensed with in many cases lias been proven
beyond n doubt by the testimony of hundreds of people
who publicly clilm that their eyesight has been restored
by that wonderful little instalment called "Actlna." Write
forIJKni TRIAL OFFER and PlCIili HOOK.
ACTINA APPLIANCE CO.,
851N Curtice Bltlgi, KunatiB City, Mo.
"Taft and Roosevelt have a con
ference" was a recent newspaper
headline. We'll wager that Taft
wasn't the .one who was hoarse next
day.
Kept Busy
did you spend
your va-
Suspicious
"I hear that your engagement 'with
Miss Dashem is off?"
"Yes; it was broken last weok??'
"I don't want to be inquisitivebut
would you mind tolling me what!
caused it?"
"Not at all. Miss Dashem showed
me a crazy quilt she had pieced from
silk neckties."
"What did that have to do -with
it?"
"It struck me that a young woman
who managed to get hold of that
many nqcktles had enjoyed, entirely
too much experience in the engage
ment line."
"Where
cation?"
"On a farm up in tho northeast
corner of tho state."
"Gracious, how did you manage to
pass away your time on a lonely
farm?"
"0, no trouble at all. When I
wasn't slapping mosquitoes I was
picking sandburs out of my skin."
lOOFIKQ.
' WARRANTED FOR TWENTY-FIVE YEARS.
To any station East of the Rocky Mountains.
One Ply weighs 35 lbs., 108 square feet, $1.10 per roll.
Two Ply weighs 45 lbs., 108 square feet, $1.30 per roll.
Three Ply weighs 55 lbs., 108 square feet, $1.50 per roll.
We save you the vholsalers' and retailers' profit. These
special prices only hold good for immediate shipment.
INDESTRUCTIBLE BY HEAT, COLD, SUN OR RAIN.
ANYBODY CAN LAY nV
Write for FREE SAMPLES or order direct frorrt this advertisement.
Satisfaction guaranteed or money refunded. We refer .you to the
Southern Illinois National Bank.
Century Manufacturing Co. East St. Louis, 111.
Short Arm Jnbs
The trouble about whitewashing
Ballinger is that it will be mighty
hard to find a man physically able
to wield the large brush that will' bo
necessary if tho job is finished in this
decade.
And HiuryT Too
"The man who invented the pay-as-you-enter
street car syystem "was
a great ,gonlus."
"Fudge! He was only half a
genius."
"What makes you say that?"
"He-'didn't begin it by inventing
tho come-when-you-want'em car sys-
em."
ONE DOLLAR
Pays for a Big Daily Paper
3 Times a Week and The
Commoner Both One Year
After carefully reading what the
railroad maua'gers have to say we are
convinced that thoy believe they
ought to be allowed to cliarge a rate
sufficient to pay interest on their in
flated dividends.
Sufficient
"There are a dozen reasons why
I can not lend you the money, my
friend."
"What are they?"
"Well, I haven't got it, and "
"What'n thunder's the use of the
other eleven?"
The proposition to sell eggs by
-weight is but a variation of the old
shell game.
The statement that thirty billion
disease germs have been found in
one cold storage egg is but another
proof that disease germs are willing
to inhabit anything.
Mr. Cannon says he will be a can
didate for re-election to the speaker-
Sure!
"What good did you do your con
stituents during your term?"
"Well, Is done" some of them
mighty good."
It was not until later that It
dawned upon ub that' our language is
very subtle.
Brain Leaks
Sunday service will not atone for
Monday meanness.
Clocks were made to tell time by,
not to kill time by.
The world loves a lover because
it can have so much fun with 'em.
The half of the world that Is Ig-
jnorant of how tho other half lives is
THU THRICE-
i ne A-WEEK
New York
World
and The
Commoner
I Year $1.
This Extra
Special Offer
Good Only
for a
Limited Time
A REMARKABLE OFFER
By special- arrangements, good
only for a limited time, The 'Com
moner is able to make this unpar
lelled bargain subscription after to
send The Daily New York World
Thrice-a-Wreek Edition a big daily
paper three times a week and The
Commoner, both one year each for
$1. Regular price of both i3 $2.
This big offer means 15 G big daily
papers from the nation's metropolis
for. all practical purposes aB good
as a regular daily and 52 issue
of Thie Commoner, or 203 rapOrc for
only $1, less than a half cent apiece.
This special offer is good to all
new or renewing subscribers who
send In their subscriptions promptly
To get tho two papers, the full
amount, $1, must be sent .to Tho
Commoner, Lincoln, Nebraska, and
mention this offer when wilting.
The Commoner wants 'averydne to
call the attention of their friends to
this great offer, TJiis extra special
inducement will enable you to help
along tlu work Thq Commoner is
doing) by adding to its list as many
new names as possible. Address
ttHE COMMONER, Linqolir, Neb.
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