jjflpi fwj u x v 10 The Commoner. VdLTJME 10, NtJMBEE 38 (T f-",-s"fJ: r' diffii 'SlIlMMIWITl rN er mmoRflr()t Tho Tariff Tariff on soap, . . Tariff on rope, . . Tariff on sugar and copper. , Tariff on shoes, Tariff on screws, Those who must- buy come1 a 'cropper. Tariff on brass, Tariff on glass, Tariff on coffins and cradles. Tariff on stool, Tariff on meal, Tariff on dlppertf and ladles. Tariff on glues, Tariff on booze, - Tariff on halters and bridles. Tariff on boots, Tariff on fruits, tlarlff on Bibles and idols. Tariff on hay, . .Tariff on clay, Tariff on coal oil and candy. Tariff on jugs, Tariff on drugs Isn't that tariff a dandy?-.".. Tariff on boots, .' Tariff on sheets, Tariff on woolons and cottons:;,.; Tariff on beans, ;.'.;. -: Tariff on screens, V- ' ' Isn't the whole tariff rotten? ' '. ' Tariff- on lead, Tariff on bread, Tariff on organs, piai.os. "' ' Tariff on straw, , . ,..l( Tariff on -slaw, . :t,'.. . ; Tariff on prunes and bananas. '-A? Tariff on socks, Tariff on clocks; Tariff on all of creation; But, glory bo! Thoy didn't agree To put a stiff tax on salvation. ship, As an example of too previous enumeration of the poultry while the eggs are in process of incubation this is" entitled to the ribbon. Mr. Can non may not be eligible when the timo comes. Quito a number of g. o. p. con gressional candidates are regretting that their nominating conventions were held prior to" the Maine election. Some of these days we hope to see a, city that boasts, of tho kind of popu lation it has, rather than the number. . The Illinois republican state con vention seems to have had its for gettery working full time on the Lorimer person. i Since the Maine election the bar bers have seriously considered rais ing the price of shaves to 20 cents for all g. o. p. candidates. Doubtless thero. are a number of administration supporters who wish they possessed Senator Hale's politi cal foresight. "Dioxydiamidoarsenobensol" is the name of a new blood remedy recent ly discovered in Germany. Sounds like an administration defense of the Aldrich tariff law. also very generally unconcerned about it. , Jealousy consists" largely in always looking for something you hope never to find. The man in love with his work is never much concerned about tho whistle. Men wfto labor for the reward of public, approbation seldom hear the cheering. Crooked politics thrives best where tho cry of "vote the ticket straight" is loudest. The mpro money one has the easier it is to talk about the bles sings of poverty. It would be easy to get to heaven it. we were allowed to be the sole judges of our own conduct. Funny, isn't it, but tho boy who is so anxious at eighteen to have a heavy beard is even more anxious at forty to get rid of it. DO YOU NT A NEW BED? ThwBwMtlful Vamlre Bnowr White, Guaranteed ) qd StnihireBedrTO Wa ntnL'D "If ntvlno 41... l- a and boatbcdiiln tho World. Wo oll them at lo vr Factorjrl'rlccs You can trrthom S0rinv y.fnl you buy.ffjarwrito for Factory Prices and Bod Ca.ta.inn ran.' Marlon Iron fc Braw Bed Co., JOQMaln St., Marlon, IntC x f Prices 08ent1l,raeS Chicago Scale Co. StP" Eyeglasses Not Necessary That Hie eyes can be strengthened so that eyeglasses can be dispensed with in many cases lias been proven beyond n doubt by the testimony of hundreds of people who publicly clilm that their eyesight has been restored by that wonderful little instalment called "Actlna." Write forIJKni TRIAL OFFER and PlCIili HOOK. ACTINA APPLIANCE CO., 851N Curtice Bltlgi, KunatiB City, Mo. "Taft and Roosevelt have a con ference" was a recent newspaper headline. We'll wager that Taft wasn't the .one who was hoarse next day. Kept Busy did you spend your va- Suspicious "I hear that your engagement 'with Miss Dashem is off?" "Yes; it was broken last weok??' "I don't want to be inquisitivebut would you mind tolling me what! caused it?" "Not at all. Miss Dashem showed me a crazy quilt she had pieced from silk neckties." "What did that have to do -with it?" "It struck me that a young woman who managed to get hold of that many nqcktles had enjoyed, entirely too much experience in the engage ment line." "Where cation?" "On a farm up in tho northeast corner of tho state." "Gracious, how did you manage to pass away your time on a lonely farm?" "0, no trouble at all. When I wasn't slapping mosquitoes I was picking sandburs out of my skin." lOOFIKQ. ' WARRANTED FOR TWENTY-FIVE YEARS. To any station East of the Rocky Mountains. One Ply weighs 35 lbs., 108 square feet, $1.10 per roll. Two Ply weighs 45 lbs., 108 square feet, $1.30 per roll. Three Ply weighs 55 lbs., 108 square feet, $1.50 per roll. We save you the vholsalers' and retailers' profit. These special prices only hold good for immediate shipment. INDESTRUCTIBLE BY HEAT, COLD, SUN OR RAIN. ANYBODY CAN LAY nV Write for FREE SAMPLES or order direct frorrt this advertisement. Satisfaction guaranteed or money refunded. We refer .you to the Southern Illinois National Bank. Century Manufacturing Co. East St. Louis, 111. Short Arm Jnbs The trouble about whitewashing Ballinger is that it will be mighty hard to find a man physically able to wield the large brush that will' bo necessary if tho job is finished in this decade. And HiuryT Too "The man who invented the pay-as-you-enter street car syystem "was a great ,gonlus." "Fudge! He was only half a genius." "What makes you say that?" "He-'didn't begin it by inventing tho come-when-you-want'em car sys- em." ONE DOLLAR Pays for a Big Daily Paper 3 Times a Week and The Commoner Both One Year After carefully reading what the railroad maua'gers have to say we are convinced that thoy believe they ought to be allowed to cliarge a rate sufficient to pay interest on their in flated dividends. Sufficient "There are a dozen reasons why I can not lend you the money, my friend." "What are they?" "Well, I haven't got it, and " "What'n thunder's the use of the other eleven?" The proposition to sell eggs by -weight is but a variation of the old shell game. The statement that thirty billion disease germs have been found in one cold storage egg is but another proof that disease germs are willing to inhabit anything. Mr. Cannon says he will be a can didate for re-election to the speaker- Sure! "What good did you do your con stituents during your term?" "Well, Is done" some of them mighty good." It was not until later that It dawned upon ub that' our language is very subtle. Brain Leaks Sunday service will not atone for Monday meanness. Clocks were made to tell time by, not to kill time by. The world loves a lover because it can have so much fun with 'em. The half of the world that Is Ig- jnorant of how tho other half lives is THU THRICE- i ne A-WEEK New York World and The Commoner I Year $1. This Extra Special Offer Good Only for a Limited Time A REMARKABLE OFFER By special- arrangements, good only for a limited time, The 'Com moner is able to make this unpar lelled bargain subscription after to send The Daily New York World Thrice-a-Wreek Edition a big daily paper three times a week and The Commoner, both one year each for $1. Regular price of both i3 $2. This big offer means 15 G big daily papers from the nation's metropolis for. all practical purposes aB good as a regular daily and 52 issue of Thie Commoner, or 203 rapOrc for only $1, less than a half cent apiece. This special offer is good to all new or renewing subscribers who send In their subscriptions promptly To get tho two papers, the full amount, $1, must be sent .to Tho Commoner, Lincoln, Nebraska, and mention this offer when wilting. The Commoner wants 'averydne to call the attention of their friends to this great offer, TJiis extra special inducement will enable you to help along tlu work Thq Commoner is doing) by adding to its list as many new names as possible. Address ttHE COMMONER, Linqolir, Neb. H r-r p "T" , . riA-.W .)U Jmt .tij fcjp J