""WM mtifmwy"mmmnm The Commoiuer SEPTEMBER 11, 1908 13 Somo Entertaining Sights Last week was state fair week in the city where the architect of this department lives, and the architect spent several profitable hours study ing the crowds on the streets. A bunch of city boys, togged out in Up-to-date style, trousers turned up at the bottom, dinkey little hats with brims turned down in front, yellow shoes with huge brass buckles, vivid and flowing neckties . O, they were real "classy" "boys, nil rteht. And they stood on & cor ner and passed remarks about the people who went by. when a bronzed young fellow, surely from the country, went by with his shoes dusty, his clothing a little out of date his hat far from a model of fashion and his hands and feet troubling him, the "classy" boys, laughed and had a lot of fun among themselves about the "country jake. But it so happened that the archi tect not only knew all the "classy boys, but he knew the "country jake." One of the "classy boys' earns $4 a week in a local store. Another one never earned an hon est penny in his. life, but lives at home with his father, who is book keeper in .a manufacturing plant. Another lives with' his widowed mother, who has not yet spent all the life insurance money left her by her husband. And another earns a dol lar now and then as usher In a mov ing picture show, living with his father, who is a skilled craftsman. Between the lour of them they poa- sibly could have raised $1?37. "Thank you," said the bewildered visitor. A moment later another visitor asked the same question 0f another resident. "Certainly; three blocks east, three blocks south.. You can't miss it." Will somebody please tell the architect of this department where to find a fair where he can buy a genuine popcorn ball the kind of popcorn balls they used to sell glued together with a genuine sugar syrup, and plenty of it, instead of miserable glucose and not enough of that to stick the grains together? No, it isn't our "taster" that has gone wrong. It Is a perversidn of the commercial Instinct a perver sion that causes men to put up a miserablo imitation of the real thing for the purpose of deceiving the un wary and making an unearned profit. What we want Is a genuine ball of popcorn, real sugar, made like a ball instead of smashed into a flat cake and wrapped In tissue paper that sticks to it. No matter how fine the fair at tractions may be, there are two things that will draw people away from them a lost child and the pa trol wagon. O, yes; another thing the fire department making a rum Dr. Osier made one mistake in his attempt to set a date when a man was -useless. When a man reaches the age that he does not feel an im- a bunch of money to provido against posBiblo contingencies. When tho striko against intoler able conditions came as wo know it would our officials mado ready to pay strike benefits. Then tho employers went before the judge and secured a restraining order. "But did you not say wo could ac cumulate a strike fund?" wo asked in astonishment. "I did," replied tho judge. "But nowhere in tho records of this court will you find that I said you could pay out tho money after you accum ulated it. This injunction is now In force." Fortunately for us we have thus far been able to conceal our contempt. ORGAN Of Supsriw Ml ns tea! VaJtfft The rtcd arena baa latest models really create a new standard. la been developed and perfected by un so thnt our orsran 1 othftt (act. so great has beea the tneroTemeBt that we have dlscoa tlnuedall for mer styles. EbObTbIIII Anyono now in the market F mJIwI for an organ should send " mwaww fof our Reyf Organ Catalog. It will bo a revelation. The beautiful Idyllic pipe organ tone of these organs makes them a "wise Investment for homes and churches. Also ftarj;aiia in SlizAtJy UudOrzanu llundredsofgoodlnBtramentatakcn In exchange, offered at Bonilnal prices. Writt today. LYON & HEALY Adam Street. CHICAGO FOR LARGE AND SMALL FARMS In Northwestern In illaiiA tho xrrafe Ilallroad and Man ufactnrlnir belt of ,lhu United States. A Scheme That Failed Having read in tho daily newspa pers of largo orders given to man ufacturing firms, contingent on the election of Mr. Taft, we concluded to make a bluff. Calling upon tho tailor wo select ed a fine piece of goods, and with out deigning to inquire as to the price we let the tailor take our measure. This finished wo started out of the shop, but the tailor said: "We require a deposit with all orders." Turning haughtily to the knight of the needle and goose we exclaimed in thunder tones: "If Mr. Taft is elected I will come in and pay for the suit the morning after election. If he is defeated I shall not need it." Our family doctor says that with careful nursing he will be able to rnrliir.A our bond Riifll nlnnflv tn lot Olir hnt. RfftV on. Thn tnllnr'5 trrm I landed before wo cquld dodge. White KELLER ft WEMNGER, North Jaden, lad. References: Cltltona Hank, Farmers it Merchants, North Judaou, Ind. All tMiMd iron,3atioke.rJLJ I F toreandtameneaBron It. ' lie tacord.3 tons In 1 hour. A ' feed each itroke Smooth balost omt draft. Frco trial, satisfaction rnaran teou. Ask lor Catalog 33 Ait4Fa4afl Hay Praaa C.. ISZlW.IZtHSt. Kane OHy, M. Kill V 'ewc,fy on Installment; delivered on first DU1 payment. Cat'log free Emox Jewelry Co., Amcslniry, Main. GOVEItNMKNT POSITIONS In tho United States, Panama and Plilllppino IMmuU. Kxumln atlons soon In IJncoln. Circular 274 frivinir lull particulars ax to posltloim. salnrJcn, etc.. sunt free by tho Natl. Cor. Institute, Washington, I. C. 20 American Girl Post Cards, and mem bership to our pent card exchange; alfio 3 moo. subscription to our paper, all for 10 CtH. UP-TO-DATB FARMING, Dept. A, Iridlanapolls, Ind. pulse, to.,chase after, the fire denart- But tho "country jake" has 120 ment as it rushes down street, it is acres of corn that will go fifty bush els to the acre, and he will thresh not less than' a thousand bushels of wheat as soon as the threshermen can get to him, and he owns sev eral head of horses, some hogs and several head of cattle. He is only a renter now, but he has put upwards of $1,500 in the bank in his home town during the last threq years, and next year he will own a fine little farm of eighty acres all earned by his own labor. He came down to see the stock and machinery exhibits at the fair, and he not only had a nice little sum of money in his pocket, but his credit was good lor enougu of anything ho saw and wanted at tho fair grounds. He may not know how to wear fine clothes, and he may not be- able to whistle all the latest popular airs and talk know ingly about the "girls" in the chorus, but ho knows how to work for himself, and he knows one girl who is the only girl for him. The four "classy" boys were hav ing lots of fun, no doubt, but when that "country jake" is middle aged ho will have enough to retire and live at ease, while the four "classy" boys will be cursing their luck and loudly declaiming that "a good man has no chance in this country.!' time for him to shuffle off. Best Seller a 'problem No Us'o "If Mr. Taft is elected .this factory will start full time and keep going," announced the president of the com pany. "Well, if we don't like the work some judge will come along and en join us from seeking work else where," said one of the employes who had gone through an 'experience or two. "Is your new book novel?'" we asked:1 "It is," -replied the author. "The problem is to find the plot." Pass It Around "I've had my dream, and so I live content," sings Grantland Riro in tho Nashville. TenneBseean. All right, Rice; now como across with the name of the brand. piTrnTe HKcuuKi) oit nets Free report at to Patentability. Illustrated fluid Hook, and List of Inventions Wanted, went frco. KVANH, WILK15NS & CO., Waiiiinirton. D. O Texas School Lands $1.00 to $5.00 Ptrilcri Tezaa has passed now School Land Laws. MIIMom of acres are no w to bo sold by tbo Mate at 1 1. CO to t&cw nor .11 Ever notice how "mixed up" the directions are that some people give, and how brief and clear tho direc tions are that others give? "Will you please tell me how I can find the state house?" asked a state fair visitor of a Lincoln man. "See that store down street, the one with the big sign on top?" "Yes, sir." "Well, go a block the other side of the store, then turn to your left and go two blocks. Then turn to J our left again and go a half block and you'll see the dome. Then the rst will be easy." Optical (Tune: "Antloch.") Judge William. Taft of O-hl-o Thought he was very1 wise Until the "allies" grabbed him up And scratched out both his eyes. And when he saw his eyes were out, With all his might and main He jumped into Joe Cannon's arms, Who scratched them in again. And when his eyes were well once more He saw a great new light; Ho saw wage earners up in arms And ready for a fight. And then arose "Injunction Bill' - And back-tracked right away. He said we ought to modify The strong Injunction sway. But it's no use the toilers see The plain, unvarnished facts It was "Injunction Bill' hit them Where th' chicken got the ax. But . "Of course you have a right to accumulate a strike fund," said, the judge. Actinrr unoir the information our I union officials proceeded to lay up Up to Date "Why don't Wearyman go to work instead of loafing around looking up at the sky." "Ho isn't loafing; ho is just wait ing around for his airship to come in." Brain Leaks Prayer is a petition, not an order. Patience does not mean sitting around waiting for something to happen. The ministers who aro returning from their vacations find Satan still on the job. Men who are really busy seldom have time to talk about how much work, they have to do. .. Fortunately for us married men, our wives seldom try to live accord ing to the household magazines. If we waited for real trouble to come before we worried, most of us could be smiling the biggest part of the time. X.ast Monday a lot of worklngmen- marched shoulder to shoulder who will be clutching at each other's po litical throats in less than two months. This "affinity" dodgo does not fool people who possess an average idea of what constitutes morality. It is usually tho "high flyer" who drops the hardest. net-Acre. dy t Year's tlmo on the balance. 3 Intereat. tlrcalcge opportunity eTer offered to Inyeiitoni and farmer. Texaa UndlB better than Oklahoma, IowaorllllBOlu. Bend no er ata (or Book of Instruction. Hew State Law and Map ot Texaa.and I will tell yon TREE how to secure llat of over 00 million acrea o( vacant nubile land. In 5 dif ferent State, which are open to uoraeatead. Addresa E. C. HOWE, 783 Hartford Building , CHICAGO, ILL. Pianos On Credit 30 Days' Free Trial No Money Dow This concern, with a combined capital ol $7,000,000. -wonts to Bend you its wonderful Plana Book. Wo sell pianos from $144.50 up, and sruar antee a savins; of at least JH0. Wo ask no money down. We snip tho piano, and let you uso it m month, before you decide to buy. Compare II with others compare our prices with others. II you find ft the best bargain you ever saw, take two years to pay for it a littlo each month, Other wise, send it back. Don't buy a piano without seeing this book, fof this Is the larGTCstconcern of its kind in the world. We have 450,000 customers. Write us a postal today and simply say "Send your Piano Book." SjIaI, May, Stem Ce "" 35lh Street, Odcaffa "BANKING BY HAIL HADE SAFE" Why leave your surplus money where loss of 8am o is possible? Why not take advantage of the Deposi tors Guaranty Law of tho State of Oklahoma? , Wo pay four per cent on Time and Sav ings Deposits. Wo want your business and offer every , facility for the handling of tho same. Will send booklet containing law and other Information on application. GUARANTY STATE BANK , MUSKOGBE, OKLAHOMA J. D. BENEDICT, M. G. HA8KKL!, I'realdeBt (Ta ah let. OUR DEPOSITS GUARANTEED ,. , Aato . viU!j- 4g-"a!J