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About The commoner. (Lincoln, Neb.) 1901-1923 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 11, 1907)
IftfVffTKizr' '- HfJ JANUARYJLlV 1907 The Common 13 Jl MRW The Strike Bill SImpldns wuz a worker, some Where's near 'bount 6 o'clock, Slttin' 'roiintl the grocery fire, where he'd talk, and talk, and talk. 'Lowed that he could 'complish wond ers '1th th' cradle an' the plow, An' said maybe, if chance offered he would shorely show us how. But when asked to give a reason fur his lazy, shiftless ways O' jus' never doin' nothin' but a wastin' ov his days, Bill would blink his eyes a minnit then would say as if surprised, "I'm a waitin', boys, on congress, f'r I must be subsidized. "What's the use o' -takin' chances?" Bill would ask in anxious tones. "What's th' use o' wastin' muscle or a rackin' ov yer bones?" Then he'dr settle back a grinnin' in th' ol' splint-bottomed chair, One hand reachin' out f'r crackers, tother mussin' up his hair. An' next day he'd keep a loafin' an' th' rest of us would sweat F'r th' clothes that we wuz wearin' an' th' little that we et. "'Taint no use o' workin' that way," William SImpldns he surmised; "Send pertitions down t' congress an' we'll all git subsidized." An at last we got t' thinkin'.that per haps ol' Bill was right, An' we made up a committee f'r t' try an' furnish light On -tills thing that Bill had mentioned, an.' it wasn't very long T.ill we found him right, by hector, an' th' rest ov us wuz wrong. An' we all just took t' loafin'; nary load o' grain we'd haul 'Cause we knowed it didn't pay us, an' we didn't work at all. An' we're goin' t' keep on loafin' till . the country's paralyzed Or our trusty old farm! wagons, like th' ships, is subsidized. Some Thoughts on a Variety of Things , ' It is all right to sit and think ''.about the good times we had when we were young," but when we seek to have fun the same old way we are very apt to be jarred. This is a per sonal experience. JDo you remember what glorious times we used to have during the winter months in the old, old days? Sleighrides, skating parties, taffy-pulls, and all that sort of thing? The other night we sat and thought Mr. Metcalfe's Book "OF SUCH IS THE KINGDOM" And Other Stories from LIFE NOW READY FOR DELIVERY A compilation of tho special urtlclos written by Richard L. Motcalfo for Tho Commoner and now published In book form. Cloth bound, printed from clear typo on heavy paper, gilt sldo-and back stamps, 200 pages. Kent postage prepaid on receipt of f 1.00. Address s Richard L. Metcalfe Care The Commoner .LINCOLN, .-. - - NEBRASKA. about those old skating days. Of What middle aged man is there who was not an expert on the ice when ho was a boy? We heard a party of young folks slurrying by on their Waf ,thG lake' thci1' skates jingling and their merry voices ringing on the frosty air. Well having been a fine skater in the old days, and being all alone on this particular evening, we decided to go to the lake and give tho young lolks of today a few lessons in fancy skating. Wo did, too-that is, we went to the lake. Say, it's funny how much harder and slicker the ice is these days than it used to he. We got the skates on all right, but they did not fool just right. They were all-clamps, and wn used to . skate on skates that wore uu-sirups. me neel strap came up over the instep and gave it a good brace. By the way, do you remember how that old heel strap used to wear a great blister on the outside ankle bone? We never noticed 'em, of course, until after we got home from the pond, but gracious, how they would hurt then, especially if we had to saw and split a lot of wood for mother! But this is a digression. We start ed to tell you how wo gave the young folks an exhibition of fancy skating. We gave the exhibition all right. After tottering around a little we tried the "outside edge," at which we used to be particularly good. But legs havr a habit of growing unruly as the year? go by, unless one keeps them in train ing. And those unruly legs of ours refused to do as they were told. The depression we left in the ice will remain there until the final thaw in the spring. Then we tried the "inside edge," the "dutch roll," the "grapevine twist," the "figure 8," and a few more but we tried them very cautiously. And caution is not a good thing to use when one wants to do stunts on the ice. One must have nerve, and strike right out. We gave an exhi bition, as before remarked, but it was not up to the advance notices. It was very much like the- advertised tragedy that is so vilely played that it becomes a farce. It is all right to have people laugh with us, but when we are doing our best it is dis comfiting to have people laugh at us. For the rest of our natural life we are going to be content with sitting by the fire and telling how well we could skate twenty-five or thirty years ago. No more practical demon strations in ours. But what a lot of fun it is to sit by the fire and recall those old skat ing days. Nowadays it often becomes too cold for ihe young folks to go skating. But it never got too cold in the old days. The colder the bet ter. Remember how we used to build a huge fire on the bank, and then pile a few rails along for the girls to sit on while we fastened on their skates. Gee, how numb our fingers used to get! When they were that numb we could never hold an ax or a saw, but it was nothing to fasten a half-dozen obstinate buckles provided the straps were on "her" skates. Just shut your eyes and see if you can again see an old game of "dare base." Look out, there goes Dot after one of the prisoners! Crackey, how that, girl could skate and dodge! And how easily Clarence Norris could sueiik punt our guards and got on our Hne. Gracious, what a bump you ot when you tried to dodge Billy Arm atead and collided with Venc Lokk! Remember those old gamoB of "shin, noy?" Every time you think of that good old game you wonder what peo ple can sec in that game of golf. O, how the old faces come aain to view. Laughing eyes, in which the light of boyish and girlish friendship shines, peer at you through tho mists of the long, long pasL As you sit there the years roll from your should ers, the silver in your hair fades again to darkness, the wrinkles arc Ironed out by a magic "hand, and the blood grown stagnant with the passing years again leaps through your veins No wonder you get up feeling Hki you could again don the skates and do fancy stunts for the boys and girls of tods' y. God pity the man or the woman who can not sit by the fire and dream of the old, dead days.lays when lire was life without a care or a respon sibility. The governor had pardoned a man who had been convicted of a crime. The evidence was convincing. There was no doubt of guilt. Yet the gov ernor had exercised clomencv, and many men were condemning him. But out there In that little country village was a grayhaircd, widowod mother who was crying for joy, and her withered hand was resting upon the head of tho boy who had been given back to her. "He was a good son, governor," said a sobbing woman as she sat by the desk of tho chief executive. "He never gave me a cross word, and he took good care of me. He fell into bad company, and ho learned to drink and to gamble. One night, when under the influence of liquor, ho got into a quarrel at the gambling table and stabbed a man. He did not deny it. But it was the liquor, governor. Won't you please give him back to me?" The weeping mother knelt at the feet of the governor, and her sobs shook her weary frame. "He was always good to me, gov ernor; always good to mo. He will still be good to me If you will give him back!" O, all ye carping critics. You may think you could withstand the plead ing of a mother like that but could you? Before you condemn the governor, put yourself in his place. Brain Leaks A new broom does not sweep clean. A clear conscience needs no press agent. A pampered stomach is worse than a spoiled child. A tract to the freezing will not put warmth in their blood. Some men advocate reform and se cretly seek to prevent it. Tf we could we would cancel the in surance upon every apartment house where "no children" is the rule. A man who never -has anything to do is not a good man to apply to when you want something Important done. You can do so many favors for a man that he will come to the point when ha looks upon them as his just due. We do not like to see babies too awfully clean and dressed up. It leads us to believe that they are not hav ing a good time. The easiest thing in the world Is to make mistakes; the hardest is to acknowledge them; the next hardest is to profit by them. Of course it would be dangerous for any nation to knock a chip from Uncle Sam's shoulder, but .why should Uncle Sam- be so foolish as to carry a chip around on his shoulder? 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