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NOVEMBER 2, 1900
The Commoner.
13
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The Lights o' Home
Wlien the shades of evening gather,
and the disappearing sun
Marks the close of day's endeavor,
and the weary tasks are done;
When the stars begin to twinkle in
the arch of heaven's domo,
I am longing for the welcome of the
shining lights o' home.
Through the little cottage window
with a radiance divine,
And a welcome in their gleaming, I
can see the bright beams shine.
Far adown the street they greet me,
and they beckon me to haste
To the home where love awaits me,
where love's hand the light has
placed.
O, the lights o' home! Their gleam
ing, shining down the street afar,
Bids me hasten to the greeting wait
ing where my loved ones are;
And the toil of day forgotten in the
welcomes that will greet
Makes the homeward journey easy for
my tired, halting feet.
t. p
Childish feet make merry music as
they patter o'er the floor;
Happy voices wake the echoes as my
children ope the door;
And their ringing, happy laughter bids
the cares of day depart,
While the joy of life and living takes
possession of the heart.
Lights o' home! Their mellow gleam
ing marks the way from care and
strife;
Brighten ev'ry nook and corner, give
a zest to love and life;
And each ev'ning, with my loved ones,
hand in hand we gaily roam
Through the fairy lands outlying,
bathed in gleaming lights o' home.
A Query
Mr. M was making a call at the
home of a business associate. Being
very fond of children he danced little
Dorothy on his knee, and Dorothy,
while enjoying it hugely, kept her big
black' eyes firmly fixed on Mr. M 's
shining expanse of forehead. Inci
dentally it might be remarked that
Mr. M s forehead reaches trom nis
eyebrows to the back of his neck.
"What makes you so quiet, Dor
othy?" queried her papa.
This -was Dorothy's opportunity and
she grasped it.
"Papa," she asked, "why don't you
ever go barefooted on your head like
Mr. M ?"
Free, But
The returning tourist leaned over
the rail as the great steamer slowly
approached the wharf.
"Ah, America, the land of the free!"
Tin exclaimed. "Home, sweet home.
O, but it's good to once more see my
native land, to breathe the air of free
dom and to "
At this juncture a gentleman in a
blue uniform adorned with brass but
tons tapped the returning tourist on
the shoulder.
"Beg pardon, sir," said the official,
"but you'll have to accompany me."
"Why, what's the matter?" gasped
the returning tourist.
"A little matter of a few diamonds,
some laces, a watch or two and some
French brandy concealed in your
boxes and trunks."
An hour later the returned tourist,
after handing over to the customs offi
cers a bunch of money big enough to
choke a cow, walked out into the oDen
air and stopped for breath beneath
the folds of a huge flag.
"I move to amend," ho muttered.
Horrible Revenge
Farmer Kornsilk came into the
house, his face wreathed in smiles.
"What tickles you, Hiram?" quer
ied his wife.
"Ma, you remember last summer
when I went to the city and met that
young Mr. Stuckuppe who spent a
couple of weeks with us last summer?"
"Yes, Hiram."
"You remember how , he kinder
snubbed me because my clothes wasn't
tailor made and because my hat
wasn't right in fashion?"
"Yes, you told me about."
"Well, Maria, I've just got even with
him for treatin' me that way."
"Goodness gracious, Hiram; what
have you done?"
"I've just shipped him a barrel of
annles bv exnress and wrote him p
letter telling him he could have 'err I
for nothing by just paying th
charges."
"That's what I call heaping coal
of fire on his head, Hiram."
" 'Coals o fire,' nothing! They're
Ben Davis apples."
Preparation
With a sigh of deep regret the wis'
old T. Gobbler laid aside his eveninf
paper and remarked:
"The top limbs and a long fast fo;
me.
it
"But why cease eating right now
papa?" queried the little Gobbler
"Ever since yesterday the master haf
been giving us the best things to eat
and the most of them. Why, I car
just eat all I can hold without hav
ing to hustle a bit."
"Be warned in time, son," said T
Gobbler. "Better the high limbs and
the long fast with mo than a contin
ued feast and the ax before the end
of the month. The annual sacrlflcr
draweth nigh."
"What do you mean, papa?"
"My dear, the morning paper con
tains the president's Thanksgiving
proclamation. For years the appear
ance of that proclamation has usnered
in a season of anguish and tears for
me and mine. I've no time to ex
plain, but if you are wise you'll follow
papa's example. Me for the top
bough and a month of hunger."
Unfair Advantage
The eloquent political speaker was
pouring forth a torrent of eloquence
in defense of his party and its poli
cies. He was appealing to patriotism
with tears in his eyes.
"My fellow citizens," he said. "I
love that dear old flag which so
nroudlv floats above us today. Be
neath its waving folds we have peace
and plenty. Under the sheen of its
glorious stripes and stars we are pro
tected, and all the world looks on it
and is glad. It is the beacon of lib
erty beckoning to the downtrodden
of earth. It demands of each one
of us our largest measure of devo
tion." While the applause was ringing the
orator wiped the perspiration from
his classic brow, and then continued.
"No sacrifice it may demand of us
can be too great. It must be upheld
at any cost. Where it has once been
raised it must never be hauled down.
We who live beneath its folds must
ever be ready to die to defend it.
Yoa, wo must bo ready to ohed our
life's blood"
At this juncturo a gratlornan
climbed upon the stage and extended
a hand in which was a sheet of paper.
"Wh-a-a-fs that?" queried tho
speaker.
"O, I've listened to what you'vo said
about making sacrifice of blood an all
that sort o' thing Vr th' old flag,"
drawled tho man who had interrupt
ed, "an I thought this would bo a
good time t' let you correct tho tax
Bchedulo you handed in a week ago.
I'm th' assessor an' I guess you forgot
to put all your Btuff down. Don't you
think it would bo easier to pay a few
uonars or honest taxes v keep th'
old flag flyin' than it would bo to die
Vr it?"
While the orator was gazing blank
ly at the assessor about nine-tenths
of the audience sneaked out, realiz
ing that it would bo much easier to
think about dying for tho flag than to
actually pay tho cost of keeping it
Hying.
The one-tenth that remained had
nothing to assess, therefore were
nly amused.
A Cereal Story
From tho Tuneup, Nob., Cheerful
rjvre:
Bill Bottles brought us in a sample
ar of his corn last Thursday. We
Igure that it will run about a pint
'o tho ear if the entire crop is equal
o the sample.
Jim Wellers brought in a cornstalk
Vednesday that was seventeen feet
ilgh and thirteen feet to tho first ear.
rim says he'll have to gather his corn
Ith one of them patent pruning
.nives that work with a lover. He
claims that the stalk he brought in
vas the shortest one he could find
I !n a 80 acre patch.
The bridge across Lickus creek was
out of commission a couple of days
last week. One of the stringers broke.
Ab Corners took tho old stringer out
md fixed up the bridge by substitut
ing a stalk of his corn. He thinks
It will hold until tho county commis
sioners can meet and take action.
Corn shuckers in the Pottet neigh-1
uornoou nave sirucic aKiunat hiiuuk.-
ing by the bushel. They claim they
ought to be paid by the cord.
Den Carberry, who has been run
ning a corn sheller in this neck o
the woods for years, announces in
this issue that he will raise his price
for shelling three cents a bushel. He
says the ears aro so big he Is put to
heavy expense hiring men to break
them in two before they are fed into
the sheller.
Ye editor drove out to the Lick
Skillet neighborhood yesterday and
looked over the results of Miss Mazle
Dubet'3 summer's work. Miss Mazle
broko the ground, planted the crop
and tended 85 acre of corn the last
summer, and has just finished shuck
ing the entire crop a little matter of
5,950 bushels. In order to prevent
misunderstanding and annoyance ye
editor blushingly admits that the cards
will bo out next week.
MAKING THE HOME CHEERFUL
How to Provide Amusement for
Old and Young-Fun for All
We frequently urge tho renders of this paper
to do till they can tovrardu making the heme on
cheerful as possible for nil the family.
Now wo wunt to tell you how you can cheer
and brighten jour homo In n itttxii'ly wonderful
way. Just thlnkl You ctwi get a genuine I5d son
phonograph on free trial In your home unrt
lobe paid for If acceptable tit tho rate ut 5.09
a week and upward. Bee the offer at the bot
tom of thiu column.
Suppose ou get Home minstrel show records
reproducing to aU.ol to perfoc lion the (treat
est comic art sts. Thin take some band music,
Soiirh'k Marcher. Waltzes by Stratum, hou! Htir
rtng lively music, then grand opera concert
saassa-jfea
.rTr2i"T35jr
Music for Your Homo
pieces as well as tho fined vocal solos; also
comic songs, ragtime, dlalogfli comic recita
tions, pluno, organ, violin, banjo and other Ins
trutnental music; all kinds of sacred mtwlc,
duets, quartettes, f ull choruses. ..--,
This wondiTfu' Instrument. I think, is far. far
bettcrthan apiano ororgan.thouprh costing only
one-llMiui one-tenth a much: tor It Blre you
endlcHsvuricty.lt always plays perfectly una
everybody cun play It. .-...,,,
With an Kdkon phonograph in yurhomcyou
can arrange a concert at any time w UB i just
tuch a programme as brings $1 and f2 a scat la
the opera houses of a big city. nwrnnn ,,
Or If you like dancing you can arrange a
dance In your own home or in any hall; for the
Edison phonograph is loud enough.
Yes. indeed, the EdLson phonograph is tho
king of entettaiuers for the home.
Head what Mr. Edison says; read the great
free-trial easv-puyment offer.
Mr. Edison
says:
" I want to see a.
Phonotfraoh in every
1 American home.
Limerick
There was a young man in Mobile
Who broke the town law with his
while.
When confronting the judge
He muttered, "O, fudge!
It seems to be useless to squile."
Brain Leaks
Heroism sometimes consists in not
doing things.
It's getting to be very difficult to
tell where the rear advertising sec
tion of the average magazine begins.
The officeseeker is usually worried
about the future of the country.
People who go to church from a
sense of duty seldom catch the odor
of sanctity.
8end no moneCflB
Free Trial
Free Trial Means Free Trial
TJ o Money Down. No C.O.!.
Try tho wonderful Edlton phonograph In your
own home before you decide to buy. Then If.
acceptable pay on cosiest poaIMe payments.
ri tti flruat kind of a (Tendlne ZdicOO
TinonoiCTftDU. r
i " w m
W
SIGN
This Coupon
-JC fr jti or
'W
'&
n trttt thO CTMlt raijtoa J z? n:
catalogs and full explanation s&V Q&
1 or cue wonocnui rco uiai
offer. Han't botberwIU
wrltlnru letter. J tut
write your name ana
addrCM puumj uu
the coopon ana - Ai
mail today. WV;
A.
-Frederick
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Uiibita. Q.
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