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The Commoner;
VOLUME' 4, NUMBER 2S
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"bargain boLys." '" ;
East over noted, 0 my friends,
Fate's ever unkinw ways? ' ' ;';
iHastthou o'er noted when she sends '"
Her so-called "bargain days?" ';
When you aro flush with ready cash
And feeling 111 and right, . :
'tOf bargains you got ne'er a flash,
For there aro none in sight.
'Kt's dlfCerent when you're nearly broke'.
And you think once again
' VYoU'll have to gently place in soak
Your faithful watch and chain.
JTIb then the "bargains" loom immense
To tomnt tho nassorbv:
tlust.whcn you're down to 30 cents
And nay day nowhere nigh.
r3Tou need a hat ah, there's your size,
And just a perfect oeauc.
oho. bettor .has yet met your eyes,'
Nond other seems to suit,
f Was four-r-now two." A great appeal,
T6 economic sense.
'Alas, when you dig down you feel.
A .paltry 30 cont3.
A
jfVou-see a shirt that meets your taste
Htmg up in fine display;
fro road its price you quickly haste,
Then slowly turn away. v" '-,
'This dollar shirt now 'sixty-two"--
You sadly wander hence,
For at your pocket's bottom you
Feel only 30 cents. ' '
"This suit is now Four Ninety-eight
Was glxtecn yesterday."
Suro mammoth bargains such as that
But seldom come your way.
tYou need the clothes, and. that's a
cinch
Your own is full or rents
You dig down deep and sadly feol
The sum of 30 cents.
'Twas over thus, and very liko
'Tis thus 'twill over be.
Good bargains you can never strike
When you are up tn G.
But bargains wonderful and grand,
Alluring and immense, - s
Will loom around onoVry hand-
When you've but 30 cents. -. - v
"Yes, going up into tho northwest
country," said tho tall passenger. "I'm
Ipoklng for land. As I was saying,
this menace of the gamuilng bplrit
is"
j "Going to stop at Fairfax or Bone
steel?" queried tho fat man.
. "I'm going to register at Bonesteel.
If I can draw a quarter section of
that"
Just then a man camo through tho
'.Jain announcing sometnmg or, other
about the drawing ana the tall pas
senger hurried to as"c him the total
number of registrations to date,, and
then uusied himself figuring out his
chances.
Evor Notloo That.
. Roasting cars are always best just
when your teeth are so poor you can't
gnaw it off i he cob?
When you want watermelon the
most you have to eat it off of a plate
with a patent kind or fork?
' When it is hottest ana you- want to
sit around without a collar and with
the neckband of. yoUr snirt turned in,
company always comes?
Just when you have plenty Of time
to read the daily newspaper there is
never anything worth reading in it?
Busy M&n ,,
, , "Binks Is the busiest man in the
country now." "
"That's strange, t tnougnt lie was
so rich he' didn't have 'to work."
"His riches are responsible. Ho
bought a big touring auto a short time
ago. Now, when he ren't fixing some
break in the machine he is in court
defending a damage suit."
Dlfforo nt.
"Gee whiz, Maria! I'm 'going to
move out of this Neighborhood. Those
Binks children are always yelling; lust
hear that one yell now. It's enough to
drive a man crazy. Why can't people
teach Their children not to be forever
running around the neighborhood cry
ing at tho top of their voices. If I
owned the kid that's doing all that
crying I'd"
"O, Mr. Binks, that's our own pre
cious little Johnnie cryrng. I won
der "
"Our Johnnie? Poor little follow!
Something must have frightened or
hurt him. I'll go right out and see
what's the matter." ' . '
Consistent; ' ' ,
"Yes, sir," exclaimed." tho tall pa's-"
senger. "I believe the best thing the
government ever did was to suppress
the iniquitous Louisiana lottery. It
cultivated a spirit of gambling. Gam
bling, I insist, is the bane of our
national life. The gambling mania is
growing, and stern measures are nec
essary if wo would throttle 'it. 'And'
it must bo throttled, else it will de
stroy us as a nation. We must Bet
our heels upon it. Wo must set our
faces against it. We must"
uoing lar " quoried a fat
across tho aislo.
man
Old Storlos.
New stories are as scarce as hen's
teeth. And the new stories are sel
dom as good as the old ones. Senator
Stone. has been telling a story and it
has been' taken up -by the newspapers
and given' wid .circulation. Accord
ing to Senator Stone the inhabitants
of Missouri)' in the early days of the
anti-slavery agitation, met every pros
pective settler" at the Mississippi river
and pointing 'tcKa. cow asked the new
comer what it -was. If the stranger
said "cow," he was allowed to enter
the state. If he said "keow," ho was
spotted as an abolitionist and turned
back. On the other hand, the Kan
sans, who were largely free soilers,
naa a Dear at the state line. If the
newcomers called it "bear," they were
welcomed to the territory. If they
Called it "b'ar," th6y were turned back,
being Missourians and pro-slavery in
their sentiments.
This is a good story, but it is like
all other good stories merely a varia
tion of a story told amid the Judean
hilte three thousand or more years
ago. The Ephrairaites waxed wroth
at. the Gileadites because they had not
been asked to help in the fight against
the Ammonites, and as a result the
Lphralmites and the Gileadites went
to war in earnest. The Gileadites got
the best of it, and posting men at the
fords of the Jordan, stopped the flee
ing Ephralmites as tney maae appear
ance. Being men of the same race and
not wearing distinctive uniforms it
was difficult to ten enemy from
friend, so JIjo Gileadites framed up a
scheme that gaye tho early Missouri
ans, and Kansans their clue. When
ever a man showed up at tho ford ho
was stopped by tho Gileadites pickets
and asked. "Art thou nn ?7 '-i,.
I Of course the scared fugitive would
M
i-',
dGmr it Then the nlckets "would say
to him, "Say now 'sniaboleth.'" Ow
ing to some peculiarity of their lingual
apparatus tho Ephraimites could not
sound the aspirate, and thoy wpuld say
"s'ibboleth." A moment later there
would be a dead Ephralmite congealed
in the bushes. Acording to biblical
lore there were "forty and twq thou
sand" aspirates droppea at the, fords
of the" Jordan that day. ,'.
The whole story may be -found in
the twelfth chapter of Judges, first
six verses. .
BralnM-occks.
You can not break a bad habit, by
trying to bond it. .
Fame is dearly bought at the ex
pense of conscience.
r The man who trusts God is , not sus
picious of his neighbors. " '
The man who profits by his ;0wn.
One of a young man's grayest error's
is. to mistake foolishness lor cour
age. What's the use of having, a million
dollars if your stomach won't hplp you
enjoy it? ...
The man who does not care what
people think of him is seldom worth
thinking about.
If heaven were reached only .by the,
accomplishment of great things it
would be a very lonesome place.
One trouble about moving is that
you always find so many things you
didn't know you had and do not want
Ever notice h6w quickly, time flies
when you are trying to make, up your"
mind to begin a particularly, hard
job? '
; Some men, quote the. scriptural
phrase, "Charity begins at- home,-" as
an exoiise for loving themselves above
their fellows.
Honestly now, if you saw a real live
woman who $jKked anything like .the
pictures in' the fashion , papers,
wouldn't you call for help? , ,!
It's all well enough to say "Speak
softly and carry a big stick," but the
man who carries a big stick usually
acquires a very gruff voice.
Some men will hunt all day for ah
excuse for . doing wrong,. ' when t!here
are a score of reasons for doing right
within their range of. vision.
We'd dearly love to meet some 'child
who could say as bring things as we
read about in the juvenile departments
of the' newspapers and magazines.
We always enjoy summer,, b'.eeause7
It is so amusing to. hear a' man who
don't know wheat f rom rutabagas de
clare that this. Is "good, weather for
corn."
Is there anything that bores' you
quite so much as the amateur photo
grapher who insists on showing you
the photos he took during his summer
vacation? lit
Suppose you had a dead friend whose
soul you know is in glory, and a living
friend whose spuj would bo lost with
out your help. If you had your choice
which would you do, bring the dead
friend! back to life or save tlie soul of
your Hying friend? Of course you
would save the soul of your livinc
friend. Thnf Wni,i i, '"
- . v "u " a siputer work
than raising the dead friend. Perlians
ie Master had this in mlhS wX
He said, "Greater works than I do"
etc.
-
hnti1' Hfflo f"X fX i '
world. -
Every human being in the' universe
has. his special talenc; successful men
are those who; have kept that talent
before the -world. '; .
Objections can be raised to every
course of action. Be governed not by
the objections, hut by the points in
favor.
;A man should not burden himself
with trying to think everything out
in advance; act ana the way will
be made plain.
The Only real failure is a failure fh
attempt the accomplishment of that
wnicn one wouia ao.
Take firm hold On life just where
yoii are. Many men fail from always
reaching out for the unattainable.
Hofdfast to your own dream. Alone,
if necessary, work it . out- to a ma
terial reality. Care ' not for the
world's-scofllngs.
The eye of each individual marks
his own horizon. Likewise 'each man
limits his career by the boundary ho
himself fixes.
The measure of a man's' character is
Ilia power to resist the dragging back
influence of his environment.
, Nothing worth doing is unimport
ant. Give thought to every phase of
an interview which you are about to
have, or a proposition you are about
to make. Ponder well your words
before you speak them. ";"
1 Do hot be discouraged when you
seem to be accomplishing little. Look
tiack over the past and you will find
that when the most important changes
were taking, place in ' your Hfo you
did not realize it. : .''' u
Do not govern your' life, -which is
entirely individual to .jfaitf1 self, by
another's outlook. Perhaps1 he 'could
not accomplish what1 you have in
mind; neither could you accomplish
the" task he sW f Or himself. '
Remember that "every ship is a ro
mantic object, except that we sail
i,n." From being at cltise range we
fail to , see our own life1 work in its
true aspect. Get into '"another shin"
I for awhile and view your work at a
distance; you will then see it at vits
right valuation. ' T ' ' .
DOri't1 keep pulling the other way.
Get in harmony with the spirit- of the
concern you are with aha carry out its
plan's according to established meth
ods. When you can improve on these
methods, suggest a means to do so,
but if your suggestions are not ap
preciated, fall in line and help ma
terialize the plans of others.
An erroneous idea prevails among
some people that the self made man
is a success and, ttie college made
man is a failure. Many men fail
some of them are coiieg'e men and
some' are not. It all lies .in the man
and his. determination to win. This
determination leads nim ir a college
man, to apply his learning; if not a
college hian, to acquire the necessary
konwledge by special stuay ana ap
plication. One thing is certain, the un
qualified man nver wins. Common
Sense;
Commonsense...
1 A man ' of original ideas will never
be. lost. iri the crowd. ' l
.Fill' each' Wur w6111l'VG:'in n
NOW and : Wii cohKment ' '
If a man has faith in himself he
Who Gets It?
"Win lives in that little cottage
down there by the lane?" .
"Txhere dwells the man who. wrote
the poem that made Beas.ley's shaving
soap famous." , ...
"And who resides in the splendid
mansion on yonder hill?"
"Beasloy." Chicago iiecora-iioHu-
Cancer Cured
izemr And all Skin ana Womb DUcwea. JTl
jior illustrated JJook, Bonnrcu. '""- u,.
DR. BYE. Sana, Kansas City. Mo.
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